Chapter 2 - The five he once cherished

Date: September 18, 2018

Time: 5:29pm

Location: Living room of The Pentagon

Cast: Yotsuba Nakano, Itsuki Nakano, Nino Nakano, Ichika Nakano, Miku Nakano

Director: Fuutarou Uesugi

-Begin!-

"Itsuki?"'

"Mmm?"

"I-I'm a bit worried about Uesugi-san. He hasn't seemed himself lately."

"Mmm mm mmm mmm mm (I agree with you too)"

"You noticed as well, Yotsuba? I thought I was the only one who noticed that Fuu-kun looked a bit…disheveled."

"Me too. He's been trying to cover it up, but I've seen him drop his facade once or twice at school. He's definitely done that more than once or twice…for an amateur actor like me only to notice Fuutarou-kun doing it now probably means that whatever he has has gotten worse."

"Mm mmm mm mmm mmm mm mm mmmm mmm (He hasn't eaten as much as he used to in the cafeteria with us as well)

"What about you, Miku? Have you noticed anything?"

"Um…I'm not too sure, but I've overheard him muttering to himself sometimes when he's alone."

"Really? What was Uesugi-san mumbling about?"

"I didn't really hear anything, but it sounded…it sounded gutteral and desperate, as if the person mumbling those words knew their days were numbered, but didn't know how to stop it."

"That's not good. There's definitely something wrong with Fuutarou-kun."

"We should ask him about it soon!"

With words of assent (and a particularly vigorous nod from Itsuki, who was still eating), each quintuplet went off to do their own things, but one thing was certain: all five of them had a certain black-haired boy with golden eyes in their minds.

-End!-

And with that, Fuutarou Uesugi ended the 3,125th scenario that was playing out in his brain. He had to be prepared for anything, after all.

There would be no room for self-doubt or insecurity if he was to embark on this final journey.

Of course, he wasn't so self-centered to believe that everything that he just imagined in his mind would happen exactly as he had envisioned. However, what he knew was that something similar to the conversations he had envisioned in his head just now would happen.

Maybe some of the quintuplets would immediately forget about him the moment they ended their discussion.

Maybe the way the quintuplets that voiced their own opinions would differ astronomically from whatever he had imagined.

Maybe they would take a long time, beating around a humongous bush before finally getting to the main topic at hand.

Maybe it would be one of those few times where Itsuki wasn't actually eating, the sun finally rose from the west, and pigs grew magnificent wings and started flying.

No matter the case, the Nakano quintuplets would eventually notice something wrong with him. If they didn't, it wouldn't actually have had major effects on the status quo, but Fuutarou would have been just a little disappointed in them. Just a teeny, tiny bit disappointed.

Thankfully, he didn't have to wait long for the quintuplets to come asking.

On Saturday, Fuutarou was working on his homework and studying for his physics exam next week when his phone rang. Suddenly filled with a strange sense of foreboding, he accepted the call.

"Hello, Uesugi here."

"Fuutarou-kun? This is Ichika. Would you like to hang out at a cafe with your Onee-san? You must be tired from studying all the time…after we eat, I can reward you with a little bit of fun ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)"

"No." Fuutarou breathed a sigh of relief. Perhaps this wasn't the moment he was expecting after all.

"Mouuu, Fuutarou-kun…you haven't rewarded me for working really hard in a while though, come to think of it." He could literally hear Ichika pouting, her face puffed up like a chipmunk whose cheeks were filled to the brim with nuts.

"Uhh…that is true…but…" And, as if she had sensed Fuutarou's determination waver like a fragile stalk of wheat in the wind, Ichika moved in for the kill.

"Theeeere's steak in that cafe, Fuutarou-kun. Did you think I would forget that it's your favourite food? And I'll be paying, so don't you worry about the price. It's the least your Onee-san could do, after all."

"...Fine. What's the name of the cafe?"

"I'm not sure, let me check...Oh! It's called Amaiuso's, but most people call it Amu's."

"Ok, its not too far from my house, so I'll go. But after this, you and your sisters will have to study hard if you want to get into a good college in the future."

"Aye aye, captain!"

Fuutarou shook his head and sighed. Damn you Ichika, he thought, you really know how to get people to do things. After hanging up, Fuutarou got ready to leave, and quickly slipped on a white and gray cardigan with black pants. As he stepped out of the door, a thought formed in his head, and he smiled. Just in case one of the quintuplets had questions about the practice problems he intentionally made harder for them in order to push them to realize their untapped potential, he slipped a few metal rings with notecards on them into his back pocket and left. In fact, out of the five sisters, he was pretty sure he knew which one was going to have those questions.

When he arrived at the cafe, he was surprised to find all five quintuplets waiting for him there. Fuutarou sighed; it seemed that Ichika had lied to him again.

"Ichika, didn't we agree on only you getting the reward?" Fuutarou harrumphed.

Upon hearing that, the rest of the quintuplets jumped in, as if they were desperately trying everything in their power to cover up some sort of machination.

"Tsk tsk tsk, Fuu-kun, did you ever think that I would let you be alone with one of my sisters? You know I would never allow you to ever do such a thing."

"Fuutarou, we haven't done anything besides study like crazy for these past few months…we deserve a reward too, not just Ichika. Besides, its not that expensive, so we won't be using too much money too."

"I didn't want to come, Uesugi-san, I swear! (said Yotsuba, who was currently bathed in enough cold sweat to fill a swimming pool to the brim) But my sisters forced me to come with them so I had no choice!"

"U-U-Ummm…..Uesugi-kun, there were some practice questions that I was stuck on, so I thought this was the perfect chance to ask you about them. Sorry for not telling you sooner;I totally didn't just make this up to distract you from the fact that we all wanted to come here to talk with you for no particular reason at all hehe"

The quintuplets' reasons were (mostly) logically sound, but as Fuutarou Uesugi looked closer it became abundantly clear that it was all a facade; behind their flimsy masks of smiles and cheerfulness were unmistakable signs of worry and concern.

He sighed. How he missed the days where they were able to talk and laugh together without having to hold anything back. Back then, if they were concerned about him they would have immediately blurted it out and they would have addressed it together. Unfortunately, those days where being with the quintuplets was a blessing instead of a curse were long gone, solely because of him and him only. It hurt, it really, really hurt when even your closest friends had to put on their stupid, artificial masks in front of you.

Well then. If they were putting on their masks, so would he. Acting disinterested and indifferent, he put his hands on his hip and asked, "So, are we hanging out or not?"

.

.

.

"Fuutarou-kun, are you doing fine?" Ichika asked as she ate her shaved ice.

Expected. "I'm doing fine. Why do you ask?"

As he answered, Fuutarou noticed that the speed in which the other quintuplets were savoring their cakes had slowed noticeably. He took another bite of his delicious steak (though anything this cafe could come up with would never be able to compete with Raiha's cooking), and contemplated the situation he was currently in. This probably meant that they were listening in, and wanted answers. He had to assuage their fears quickly.

"Because…you haven't felt like yourself lately." Ichika said quietly. There it was: the true reason why they had come.

"Really? I guess its just been all the midnight oil I've been burning trying to study and come up with learning plans for each of you bakas."

"But you haven't been eating much lately too, Uesugi-kun." Itsuki piped up, a meat bun in each hand and her mouth stuffed with three.

"And I've never seen you with unkempt hair before." Followed closely by Nino, taking a bite out of her pancakes and twirling her hair around her finger, trying not to sound like she cared.

"Are you really sure nothing's wrong, Uesugi-san?" asked Yotsuba, full of worry and concern. "You could tell us what's going on, we'd be able to understand."

Thing is, Fuutarou thought to himself, I'm not so sure you'd understand. Not easily, anyway. He felt a little pang in his heart, cursing himself for letting the pressure and stress get to him and making the quintuplets worry. Even if he was to die, he…he still cared about the five idiots who messed up his dull, mundane existence and poured new life into it. Therefore, he couldn't let them worry. Not until after his journey had begun. Thus, Fuutarou would divide, then conquer.

"Of course I'm not going to feel like myself lately when I've been sleeping 4 hours a day, Ichika you baka." Fuutarou said while gently bonking Ichika on the head, drawing a small bout of laughter from her. Next, Itsuki.

"I've been poor, Itsuki. Of course I'm not going to eat much."

"But Uesugi-kun, you've been eating half a bowl of rice a day!" Typical of her to notice that, but I appreciate the concern. Fuutarou smiled inwardly.

"I just want to save some money for a present for Raiha, that's all. Also, I've taken your meat bun."

"HUH? Mouuu Uesugi-kun, give them back to me!" Looking down to find her meat bun gone, Itsuki cried out in frustration and lunged forward, trying to get them back from Fuutarou.

"Since when have you worried about my hair, Nino? You sure it isn't my manliness that's gotten to you?" Fuutarou teased as he tried to keep Itsuki away from her beloved meat buns. Instantly, the quintuplet with magenta hair grew beet red and quickly turned away, muttering about how he was an idiot and he could go rot in hell for all she cared.

"Anyone would say that they're not fine when they have to worry about all five of you and how to make you girls pass your exams so your scary father doesn't get mad at them, Yotsuba.

Having beaten back the questions of the four interrogators, Fuutarou decided to put in the final nail in the coffin with a coup de grâce.

"I'm fine, you guys. Just a few days of rest and I'll be back to normal."

He could notice Yotsuba, Nino, Ichika, and Itsuki visibly relaxing. Inwardly, he breathed a huge sigh of relief, certain that from now on, everything would be relatively smooth sailing. But Miku…Miku's demeanor had changed dramatically over the course of his conversation with her sisters. At the very beginning, she had a small smille and was even laughing softly at some of the banter exchanged between them. But now, she was trembling, her knuckes white around the cup of matcha green tea that she was taking small sips from, the pained and conflicted feelings that were playing out on her face worrying Fuutarou. Stopping himself from beating around the bush in the event that Miku would clam up, he quickly got to the point.

"Miku, is something the matter?"

…And with just eight words from her, his heart nearly stopped. Not literally, though, because even though the author could have turned this story into one about coping with pain and loss, this story would have essentially ended here and the readers would be furious.

BANG!

The table trembled as Miku slammed her hands on it and stood up. She was shaking, but from what Fuutarou didn't know. "Fuutarou, are you going to leave us?" she asked with a slight tremor in her voice and tears rolling in her eyes like shining diamonds, threatening to spill out.

"W-what are you talking about, Miku? I'm not going to leave you girls, at least not until you've passed all of your exams." Fuutarou stammered. He…had not expected this to happen. Had not expected Miku, out of all the sisters, to be this perceptive.

"You haven't been yourself lately, your uniform looks messy at school, you look tired all the time and now you sound as if you're trying to hide something…Please, Fuutarou. Please tell us the truth." Every word that came out of Miku's mouth shook Fuutarou to the core; she was crying, tears rolling down her cheeks and splattering like broken hopes and dreams on the floor.

Fuutarou Uesugi's breath hitched. Just a tiny bit, but enough to raise the eyebrows of the rest of the quintuplets. His breathing grew short, panicked, threatening to reveal his true colors and topple the fragile house of cards he had built up.

For a moment, Fuutarou paused, his resolve deeply shaken by how stupidly close Miku was to the dark, painful truth Fuutarou held close to his heart. How did she even know? he wondered.

For a moment, he doubted whether or not he was able to pull off this attempt at a farewell.

Oh, how he wished he could confide in the quintuplets about his difficult decision right now.

If he only let a single seven letter word roll off his tongue and float in the air, all the burning questions in their hearts would be instantly answered, though whether new ones would pop up was almost entirely possible.

If only he could be completely sure that they would accept the news and his intentions wholeheartedly with open arms.

Unfortunately, Fuutarou Uesugi wasn't 100% sure that they would understand his actions. And they weren't as close as they had been, either. Months of rabid infighting and vicious arguments had frayed their seemingly unbreakable bonds of friendship. But mostly, it was partially because of them that he had decided on this path of no return. He wished it wouldn't have come to this, but there was absolutely no way he would tell the quintuplets the truth now. Not now, at least.

Fuutarou took a deep breath, steeling his resolve. He had to put on the greatest show of all time, otherwise he would waver and the Nakano quintuplets would eventually find out. I'm sorry, girls. He thought.

"To tell the truth, Miku…I haven't been feeling well lately. And to all of you, I'm sorry for making you girls so worried. I've been having headaches for the past few months and it has affected me quite badly, though I didn't know exactly how bad it had become until you all noticed I wasn't looking good. I thought that it would be short, and that I would be back to my normal self soon, but clearly it hasn't. I truly apologize for bothering you girls."

Hearing this, the Nakano sisters felt bad for Fuutarou. He had this illness for so long but didn't want to tell us because he didn't want us to worry…Fuutarou-kun/Fuu-kun/Fuutarou/Uesugi-san/Uesugi-kun, you really don't have to push yourself this hard for us.

"We'll ask Dad for some medication for your headaches. In the meantime, Big sister Onee-san will come check up on you and make sure that you're doing fine," Ichika said with a wink.

"Next time, you can tell us if you're not feeling well or anything, Fuu-kun. We won't bite you or anything. After all, how can you teach us if you're sick and unable to move?" Nino scolded.

Oh, if only you knew the truth. Fuutarou smiled. To the quintuplets, he looked to be happy that they were concerned about him. To him, however, it was a sad smile. A smile that showed Fuutarou as his genuine self: a stressed out nerd who had no one he trusted to confide in, who'd crumbled like a house of cards under the weight of a single decision he both hated with a vengeance and loved with all his heart.

"Thank you, Yotsuba, Nino, Ichika, Miku, and Itsuki. I'm sorry I never told you about this sooner. I really cannot express the gratitude I'm feeling right now, and I'll try to get better as soon as possible so I can truly be at my best when tutoring you girls." The five sisters glowed with pride and happiness at being complimented from their tutor, something that only happened once in a blue moon.

"So, what questions did you have for me, Itsuki?"

The quintuplet Fuutarou directed this question to instantly turned a bright shade of red similar to her hair color. Itsuki did, in fact, have queries about the practice questions he gave the quintuplets...but she had not expected Fuutarou to ask about it, certain he would forget and that she would have to remind him about it.

"Y-yeah! I have a few questions about vocabulary that I needed help on…" She took out a piece of paper with vocabulary words on it, and was opening her mouth to speak when Fuutarou stopped her. "Are the words you're stuck on, by any chance: hubris, affirmation, erudite, sympathize, and…alliance?" His eyes twinkling, Fuutarou's joyful (or gleeful, depending on how you looked at it) smile rivaled that of the Cheshire Cat.

(The last word he mentioned wasn't actually a word that confused her. Out of all five of the words he selected, the first four she was able to pronounce with correct inflection and perfect pronunciation on a consistent basis, but she didn't know their meanings. However, the word "alliance" was a special case; she understood what it meant, but somehow managed to make it sound like a type of alley ever single time she tried to say it, hence he meant it as a playful tease)

And, judging by the way that Itsuki puffed up her cheeks in a hilariously adorable pout, she knew what he meant as well. "Mouu, Uesugi-kun! You know I can't say that word correctly! But the other words were exactly the ones I was stuck on. How did you know?"

"What can I say? I know you girls too well, and I have the practice tests that you did so I know the words you have a tendency to mess up on. Here, these should be the vocabulary words that you regularly miss; review them and give it back to me once you have them all understood and memorized." He took out a few metal rings with tiny notecards attached to them, looked to make sure that they were really the ones that Itsuki had trouble on, and passed it to her.

"Wow, thanks! I'll make sure I won't get those words wrong again, especially that one." At that, Fuutarou couldn't help it, and he genuinely smiled for the first time in six months.

Struggling to contain said smile, he turned back to the other quintuplets and chuckled. From their faces, it seemed he had talked to Itsuki a bit longer than her sisters could handle. Nino and Miku had put on pouts worthy of being placed in the Guinness World Records, Ichika's smile was plastered to her face, making her look like a funny clown, and Yotsuba…well, Yotsuba herself was ok, but her ribbon was defying the laws of physics and logic by doing the macarena. For the readers who have read up to here and whose mind has exploded at this devastating bombshell: Yes, it was doing, of all things, the macarena.

Now, only now, did Fuutarou breathe a genuine sigh of relief.

He had survived. Now, on to the next task: to make sure his days were truly numbered.

When he got home after saying goodbye to the quintuplets and promising to keep in touch, he took out the things in his pocket and put them on the table. Only then did he realize that he had made a mistake. His eyebrows furrowed in confusion, wondering how he could have let this happen. It was quite a big mistake, actually.

In the notecards he had given Itsuki, one of them was his suicide note.

Even in his desire to die, Fuutarou Uesugi wanted his death to be as painless as possible. That would never happen, of course, but he felt that, at the very least, he could try to lessen their suffering by explaining himself. That would be better than disappearing without a word, carving painful holes into the hearts of everyone around him that would only grow wider with every unanswered question. Thus, Fuutarou needed to explain himself, and he also wanted to say his final goodbyes as well, two things he believed a suicide note would accomplish at the same time.

When thinking about how to write his plea for death and hide it in plain sight so that the his family, friends, and the quintuplets would only find it when he wanted them to, he had decided to use his notecards. It was easy to carry, no one would suspect a thing since he always carried something like that around, and best of all he had thought it amusing to write his wish for death in the one thing that gave him hope for a better life by making him the top scorer in the entire school.

Fuutarou had checked to make sure that the notecards were the ones that Itsuki needed, but he had merely glanced at the first notecard of every bundle, and in the heat of the moment he forgot that, because he needed to hide it in plain sight, he had, coincidentally, written a word that Itsuki had commonly missed on the first notecard in the bundle where he had written his suicide note.

But instead of weakening his resolve, this unexpected turn of events strengthened his will to die. He knew that the quintuplets would unite to try to make him feel useful again, but that would never last, not while they still fought for his love. And in a few months, he would be back at square one and he really didn't want to know what he would do at that point, having been led on with false hope and disappointed once more. For him, his family, and the quintuplets, it would be much better if his heart didn't shatter into small, painful pieces. Hence, it had become a race against time, one that Fuutarou Uesugi was determined to win, even if he had to pay with his life.

And he knew exactly where the finish line was.

No. Best not to be so hasty.

Under normal circumstances, it would be better to rush, as that would dramatically increase the chances that he was able to complete his journey. However, he faced not one, not two, but five sisters who knew him as well as he knew them. As a result, if he went for it now, they, being able to cover more ground, would have an insurmountable advantage, and so would be able to stop him in his tracks easily.

So instead, he would play the long game. Wait, wait, and wait. Lull them into a false sense of security. The time will come when their guards will lower ever so slightly, but enough for him to spring forward past the finish line. He had the time. He had the patience.

This put a temporary stop to his plans, but in the long run it changed nothing at all.

He would merely have to wait longer. He had the patience, after all.

No matter what, no matter how, he will achieve his objective.

To free himself, and to prevent himself from continuing to ruin the lives of everyone around him.

Author's note:

For those who were wondering, no I have not decided on whether or not this will become a quintuplet x Fuutarou fanfic, so no this is not going to be an Itsuki x Fuutarou or Miku x Fuutarou fanfic, at least not yet. She just didn't get a lot of screen time in the anime so I wanted to amend that.

I wanted to make this my first fanfic for 2 reasons.

First, Gotoubun no hanayome was truly the first anime that hit me hard, and I just felt like this was the best way to immortalize my gratitude for it changing my life.

Second, I was looking for a suitable topic for my fanfic when I came across Salt in the Wound by Miku'sChiefMilitaryStrategist. In my opinion, this was a particularly interesting topic to write about because virtually no other fanfiction has covered it yet, and since the author had stopped it midway I decided that I would try to put my own spin on it. Go check it out, its a good fanfic and I would like to thank it for inspiring me to write this fanfic.

Also, reviews are very much welcome for this fanfic, good or bad. So please let me know what I can improve on so I can give you guys a better chapter every single time.

I don't know how often I'm going to update this fanfic with school and everything, but I will try to stick to a weekly update for as long as I can.

That's it for this week's author's note. Thank you for giving me your time in reading this fanfic, and I can't wait to tell you what comes next for Fuutarou and the quintuplets. See you next time!

Welp, my sleep schedule is ruined. - K1tsune