Chapter 6

"It's not his to give. It never belonged to him." Helena's anger deflated. She loosened her grip on the handlebars and lowered her eyes. "It was my mom's."

Then Jason realized where he had seen the motorcycle before and why the purple finish was so familiar.

It belonged to Selina.

Helena and Selina were as close as he and Bruce were estranged. Damn right, Helena had the strongest claim to that motorcycle.

"I'm sorry, I didn't know. Selina never used it while I was with you guys."

"It's okay." Helena sighed. "She used it, just not as Catwoman. My dad disapproved after her identity was outed."

Jason huffed. "He doesn't approve of a lot of things."

"And that's why we keep secrets from him. My mom especially."

"Being mysterious was kind of her brand."

"There's probably a lot you don't know about my mom and me."

"I..." Jason hesitated. "I regret not getting to know her better while I was with your family."

Helena's eyes drifted outside the garage door toward the sun behind the Gotham skyline. "Damn it, Jay, you got me in a mood." She sniffled, her eyes wet. The sunlight made her green eyes shimmer like emeralds. "Wanna talk?"

"Um... Sure..." It was the least he could do for presuming she had stolen her own property. The last thing he wanted was to be the reason Helena cried.

"Thank you." Her tone implied the conversation would be serious. Jason picked up his coffee and followed her to the loft's exterior steps. He hoped she would tell him why she was here.

"I love that you put this here," Helena said, climbing the stairs, "Perfect spot."

On the exterior landing of the loft was a beat-up and cracking leather bench. Jason had scrapped it from an old Chevy Impala, an older model with a bench seat in the front instead of bucket seats.

Helena sat down, and Jason followed suit. He took off his hat and crossed his legs on top of a stack of tires in front of the bench. It all faced south, toward the Delaware Bay and the Atlantic beyond.

He had placed this all here precisely for the sun. Here, he could take a break from mechanic work and watch the sunset before turning in for the night. Or, he could also relieve himself from vigilante work and watch the sunrise before turning in for the day.

He took a sip of his coffee, taking a moment to savor it. Helena made a damn good latte. After a moment, she tucked one leg under the other and scooted closer to him.

Now he was uncomfortable. Damn it, Helena.

"Did you know it was just my mom and me for the longest time? And it was good. She was more than enough. I didn't need another parent. I didn't know Bruce Wayne was my father until I was five."

Jason took his eyes off the view and looked at her. "Really? Did he know?"

"Yeah, my mom tried to hide me from him, but he's the goddamn Batman; of course, he found out."

Jason scoffed. "And Talia somehow managed to keep Damian and me a secret for eight fucking years."

She lifted a brow at him. "Oh, what's that supposed to mean?"

"Means Bruce cared about you and your mom more than anyone else. You always demanded his attention. Or so he felt."

Helena shook her head and sipped her coffee. "Didn't stop him from having a kid with another woman."

"Not forgiving him, but Alfred always told me your mom and dad never really had a real relationship until they got married. Your mom was in prison when he hooked up with Talia. And..."

"And?" Helena looked at him expectantly.

"You wanna share secrets? Cuz I got some."

Helena pouted—something that made Jason's chin quiver. "These aren't secrets I'm telling you, Jason. Let's call them untold truths. These aren't things I hid from you. It's just... stuff we never talked about. No one will be hurt by me telling them... except..." Helena fidgeted with her nails. "Except maybe me."

Jason thought about his secrets and whether they were even secrets at all. He carried these burdens because he didn't want to open up to people. He understood.

"Fair enough. Alright, well..." He took a deep breath. "Talia's manipulative, and..."

"Duh," Helena said.

"I mean, her relationship with Bruce wasn't totally consensual on his part."

Helena almost choked on her coffee. "What? How?"

"She drugged him, Poison Ivy style."

"Ha! And the tabloids said my mom was trying to trap him. If only they knew. No wonder Damian is the way he is."

"In Talia's defense, Alfred said it was a small dose. Bruce was so celibate back then that he didn't need much prodding. Talia is…" Jason blew a soft whistle. "Not... unattractive."

"Hmph." Helena took a sip of the coffee. "My father always told me that he just missed my mom. As if that helped."

Jason thought about it, and it seemed reasonable, if not a little funny. Bruce had a type. Femme Fatales that liked to toy with him. Dick told him Bruce once had flings with Wonder Woman and Black Canary for a hot minute each.

They sat in silence for a while, watching the lights of the skyscrapers and street lamps twinkle on, sipping coffee.

Out of nowhere, Helena giggled. "Did you know my mom escaped prison to attend my ninth birthday? It was special for her. Y'know—cats and nine lives."

"How'd she get away with that?"

"Yeah, my father nearly had a stroke. Luckily, he and Barbara's dad were able to sneak her back in before anyone noticed."

"Blackgate must be a fucking mess if they didn't notice Catwoman was missing. Hard to believe Gordon went along with it."

"She was convicted for stealing from Oswald Cobblepot, of all people. There are worse crimes. The problem was that he was mayor at the time. He threw the book at her because he could, but plenty of people thought the sentence was too harsh."

"Well, I got another on that note. Alfred told me Bruce proposed to your mom every time he took you to visit her at Blackgate. She turned him down every time."

"Uncle Alfred likes to serve up tea, huh?" Helena smirked.

"Only things that won't hurt anybody. Alfred knows everything about the Waynes."

"So my mom turned my father down once a month for five years. That sounds like her, alright. Okay, my turn." Helena shifted in her seat to face Jason. "Diiiid you know you were my mom's favorite Robin?"

Jason put his feet down, feeling a little smug. "Yeah, I kinda guessed. She was the one that convinced Bruce to take me in after I stole the wheels off the Batmobile. She told me she had a thing for strays."

In the middle of a sip of coffee, Helena laughed and began to choke. She held onto Jason's leg as she composed herself. After hesitating, Jason rubbed her back to soothe her. The contact made his skin hum. "You okay?"

"Yeah, the funny thing is..." Her voice was a little hoarse, so she cleared her throat and looked at him with a big grin. "I was the one that convinced her to persuade my dad to take you in."

"You're kidding."

Helena shrugged. "I overheard them talking about you. I thought I had to meet the kid gutsy enough to steal from the fucking Batman. I knew we could be friends just based on that. I told my mom that if my father could take in Dick, she could take you. She only needed a nudge. You reminded her a lot of herself."

"What, that I like to steal shit and piss off Batman?"

"No!" She laughed and punched him softly. "It's actually that you both grew up the same. You had similar backgrounds."

"What do you mean?"

"Her dad was a criminal and her mom was an addict. Both abandoned her. Her parents were exactly the same as yours."

That made Jason pause a second and blink a few times. "Never really thought of it that way."

"Now we're even. I got you a place to stay way back then, and you're returning the favor now." She smiled at him, and for a moment, Jason lost himself admiring the shape of her lips.

Then she got up. The sunset was over. The night was here. "Thanks for the trip down memory lane, Jay. You hungry?"

There was an empty feeling in his chest now. He wished the intimate moment wasn't over. "I could eat. Just let me finish up downstairs."

She nodded, picked up their empty coffee mugs, and entered the loft.

Jason just sat there momentarily, trying to empty his head and not think too hard. The longer he sat, the more he didn't want to return to Helena. He didn't like opening up like that to anyone. Either it left him hurt or, this time... unsatisfied.

He finally stood up and went downstairs.

He ignored his tools and the bike, going straight to the punching bag in the bay he had made into a gym.

As he mauled the poor bag of sand, his mind reeled.

Dick and Alfred had always told him that Selina saved him from the human meat grinder in the foster care and juvenile detention system. Now Jason found it ironic that before all the times he had pulled Helena out of trouble, it had all begun with her pulling him out first.

It wasn't Selina; Helena was his savior.

Even before he knew she existed, she was looking out for him.

Fuck, I don't need more reasons to love her. I need less.

He deliberately avoided her since "coming back" because of all these confusing feelings. He couldn't blame Helena and Selina for how his life turned out. They had meant well. But most of the terrible things he experienced would have never happened if he had not met Bruce, and they were responsible for that.

Jason had difficulty adjusting to living at the stately Wayne Manor and attending the posh Gotham Academy. The safe world he was supposed to be grateful for was alien to him.

He never asked to become Robin. Bruce saw the damaged and angry little kid his wife convinced him to take in and dealt with it the only way he knew how. He distracted Jason's anxiety with excruciating training. He redirected all of Jason's aggression by turning him loose on criminals.

It worked until it didn't.

Bruce put Jason on the frontline of a war against the evils of human nature. Nobody, especially a teenage boy, had a chance of winning. Jason was pitted against the very same type of people that birthed him. Jason eventually saw his deadbeat thug of a father in every criminal he knocked down. He saw his insatiable addict of a mother in every lunatic he locked up in Arkham.

Instead of saving Jason from a human meat grinder, Bruce had turned him into one. So much of his time as Robin was full of rage and hatred. He saw red everywhere.

And back then, the only thing he didn't hate was Helena.

Back then, he was in love with her.

And now he realized something.

That love did not die when he did.

Notes

I think this is the longest chapter so far. I dumped a lot of backstory on you guys, but I hope it was interesting and clarified things. The AU of this story and my take on Helena are inspired by Tom King's Wedding arc, Paul Levitz's Worlds' Finest series, and one more writer's iconic run, but I'll keep them a mystery for now. 😏