Lisa

All the awesomeness that comes with finally seeing Jennie again disappears with that single statement. It's amazing what a person can forget in a year. Such as the way I built our entire brief relationship on a lie.

It doesn't matter that I had a plan all worked out to explain why I lied. Because the truth is, I had plenty of opportunities to tell her—and every time I was about to, something would happen or I'd find a reason to put it off. Until it was too late. I was too afraid that I would lose what we had, that it would change things, that she would see me differently. I lost her anyway, though, because she didn't answer when I called from LA. Even worse, she didn't leave me a way to contact her: no note, no number, nothing.

"Lali?" Jennie looks confused, and hurt, and nervous, and just so damn beautiful.

"I can explain."

She wrings her hands. "Are you a professional hockey player now?"

"Yeah, but—"

"For how long?"

I blow out a breath. There's no point in lying anymore. "This will be my seventh season with Chicago."

"Seventh?" Her lips flatten into a line, and that hurt shifts, turning into something that looks like betrayal. "You lied to me about your job?"

"I was going to tell you the truth, I swear." It's the worst cop-out.

Her brow furrows. "It was the two of us for weeks—you had plenty of time to tell me the truth. Why would you lie in the first place?"

"There's a logical explanation, Jennie. I promise, if you'll let me explain, it'll all make sense."

She continues to wring her hands. "How can I even believe you? What else did you lie about?"

"Lisa, Chen, you two comin'? We need you for the team picture," Alex calls from behind me.

Fuck. I forgot that Chen is still here, watching this train derail.

Jennie takes a step back. "I have to get back to work anyway."

"Just give me another minute," I call out.

Alex throws an arm over my shoulder, completely oblivious to the tension flaring or Jennie's anxiety, which I'm far too familiar with. "Sorry to interrupt, but I need to borrow this one for a minute—can't take a team picture without the captain."

"Captain?" Jennie parrots, eyeing me like I'm a stranger and not the person she spent almost six weeks playing house with.

"You being all modest again, Man?" Alex slaps me on the chest. "This one is the best player in the league."

"Uh, Alex, I think—" Chen tries to interrupt.

"You're an excellent player too, Chen." He winks at Jennie. "You did a great job on the tour, especially dealing with the whole dolphin situation."

"Thank you. That usually doesn't happen during birthday parties. Typically Dillon waits until evening to get frisky with Daphne." Jennie takes another step back, muttering something under her breath as her cheeks flush.

"Do you think we can put a hold on the team photo? I need a minute with Jennie. We know each other." I pin them both with a meaningful look.

Alex's eyebrows pop, while Chen's pull down and then shoot up. It would be funny if things weren't so tense right now. Alex drops his arm and steps back, eyes darting between us. "Sorry, sorry. Sure thing. Liam and Lane are getting antsy to open their presents."

Jennie's still trying to back away slowly.

"Please. It's not what you think."

Her spine straightens, and she crosses her arms over her chest. "You don't know what I think."

"Can we go somewhere and talk?" I glance over at the information desk, where three girls are huddled together, watching us.

"I can't—I'm in the middle of a shift." She takes another step toward a door that reads STAFF ONLY.

"What about when you get off? We could meet for coffee somewhere close by?" I realize how inappropriate the first part sounds after it's out of my mouth.

Either she doesn't notice, or she pretends not to. "I can't. I'm busy."

"It's been a year, Jennie. I tried to call when I got to LA, but you never picked up. All I want is the chance to talk—at least give me that."

"There was a storm. A tree took out the phone lines and all the power. Even the generator didn't work." Her rigid stance wavers, and her bottom lip trembles.

That explains why the phone just kept ringing and ringing and eventually all I'd get was a click and a dial tone, but she could've left me with a way to get in touch with her. "I didn't know about the phones. Why didn't you leave me a way to contact you?" I take a step forward for every step she takes back.

She blinks, confused. "I did. I left a note with my phone number and email."

My stomach twists with this news. I'd considered going back to Alaska after LA, but things had been so difficult with Max's birth, there hadn't been time. "I didn't find one when I went back this summer."

"I left it in your bedroom. And maybe it was a good thing you didn't find it, considering you're a liar." Her chin trembles, and her hands flutter in the air before she clasps them together in front of her.

I was in such a rush that morning, worried about my brother and Joy and the baby, wishing I'd done things differently with Jennie. I didn't even think to leave her my cell. "I made a mistake—granted, it was a big one. I just . . . you didn't recognize me. I didn't think . . . can I give you my number now? I get that this is a lot to take in, and maybe you need time to think? I can give you that, but please, at least give me a chance to explain."

She shakes her head, but she pulls her phone out of her pocket, keys in the pass code, and hands it over to me. I quickly add myself as a contact before she can change her mind. Then I send myself a message to make sure I have her number before I hand it back.

I don't know what to do with my hands, so I shove them into my pockets. "Can I call you later so we can set up a coffee date?"

She holds her phone to her chest, eyes darting to the STAFF ONLY door and then to the group of women gathered by the information desk before coming back to me. There's no warmth, just wary mistrust. "I don't even know you. Why would I go on a date with you?"

"Don't say that. You know me, Jennie. The only thing you didn't know about was my job. That's it." I take another step toward her, but she shakes her head and backs away.

"That's it? It's not a little lie, Lali. You told me you were an alpaca farmer instead of telling me you were the captain of a professional hockey team. That's kind of a pretty huge detail to leave out, don't you think?" Her voice shakes, whether with anger or another emotion I can't be sure, but she looks as if she's on the verge of tears, and I hate that I'm the one who did that to her.

The door behind her opens. "Jennie? Sorry to interrupt, but I need your help with the otters. Ollie keeps trying to make moves on all the female otters, and you're the only one who seems to be able to control him when he's like this."

"Of course. I'll be right with you." I don't like how relieved she seems by the interruption. She spares me another wary glance. "I have to go. Take care of yourself, Lali, if that's even your name." She spins on her sneakered heel and speed walks away from me.

Even in the awful beige pants her ass looks fantastic, which is a terrible thing for me to notice or focus on.

I take my hat off and run my hand through my hair, cursing under my breath. What are the chances that I'd run into her here, of all places? That she would end up in my city? At least I know where she works, and I have her number. Now I just have to work on getting her to agree to talk to me.

I head back to the party, take part in the team photo, and watch fifteen kids from newborn to six years old turn a room upside down faster than a bunch of drunk frat guys on a bender.

Alex steps up beside me and sips out of a red cup. "You all right?"

"Yeah." I nod, even though I'm probably the furthest thing from all right. For a few minutes I was ecstatic. Now I'm confused, disappointed, and freaked out. I just want to sit Jennie down and make her hear me out. And I want to understand what the hell happened to the note she left and why it wasn't there when I went back this summer.

I was pretty sure I was falling in love with her, and I figured it was mutual. One minute she was the center of my world, and the next she was just gone.

"I'm gonna call bullshit, Lisa. Wanna tell me what's going on with the tour guide?"

"Jennie. Her name is Jennie. And we had a . . . thing a while back." I'm being vague, mostly because explaining this sucks. I've never told anyone the full story about what happened with her.

"She doesn't really seem like your usual type, or what used to be your usual type, anyway."

I nod in agreement. "You're right about that."

Alex looks around and slips a flask out of his pocket. "You look like you could use a shot."

I lift a brow.

He motions to the screaming gaggle of children, players, and wives. "I know you're here because you're the team captain and you want to make a good impression on your teammates, not because you love spending your Saturday afternoon with a bunch of screaming kids. Add in whatever's going on between you and the tour guide, and you definitely deserve a drink. Besides, I figure this'll get you to talk. Can't keep it all bottled up forever, Lisa. I know the last couple of years have been intense."

He has a point. I hold out my glass of lukewarm soda. I'll leave my car here and pick it up in the morning if I need to. And based on how things are going, I have a feeling a lot of alcohol will be involved in the rest of my evening.

"So, tell me what's going on with the tour guide."

I drain half the cup in one gulp. "I met her on Kodiak Island last summer."

He's in the middle of a sip and cough chokes. "That's the girl from Alaska? I thought you said she was from Washington. What's she doing here? Don't tell me you have another stalker." The year before I took over for Alex as captain of the team, we got pretty close, mostly because he took me under his wing and mentored me. At the time I didn't realize he was grooming me to take his place. Since then we've stayed pretty tight.

"Yes, she's the girl from Alaska. Yes, she's from Washington. She got offered a job here and took it, and I'm pretty sure she's not stalking me."

"How can you be sure? I mean, you're not that hard to find."

"She wasn't big on technology." I scrub a hand over my face. "And I never told her I played professional hockey."

"Too busy getting busy to be bothered with the chitchat?" Alex asks.

"No. Well, I mean yeah, there was lots of . . . sex, but that wasn't what it was all about."

"So how is it that you being a professional hockey player never came up?"

"I might've lied about where I lived and what I did for a living." I mumble it quickly and drain my cup. I could use another drink. Or just downing whatever is left in his flask.

"Why lie?"

"She didn't recognize me, and she wasn't into hockey. You know how it is with bunnies. They're just in for the fuck and the ride, right?"

"But she's not a bunny, so I'm not getting why it would matter then." He looks confused more than anything.

I sigh, aware explaining my rationale isn't going to be easy. "I wanted to be normal for a few weeks."

Violet squeezes her way between us, snatches Alex's cup, sniffs it, and raises an eyebrow. "Seriously, Alex? You better be careful how sauced you get. Your parents said they'd have a sleepover in the pool house with Robbie, and you know how I get in my second trimester."

Alex grins and bends to whisper something in her ear. She hands him back the cup, turning her attention to me. "I assume you're coming out for drinks after this shitshow." She motions to the table of children shoveling cake into their mouths.

I rub the back of my neck. "Uh, we'll see."

"Lisa's trying to hook up with the tour guide," Alex supplies.

Violet grins knowingly. "You mean the poor woman who was trying to hide that huge dolphin dick?"

"That's the one," Alex replies.

She gives me a light punch on the arm. "My respect for you just went up a few notches. I had no idea you were into the nerdy chicks."

"She's not nerdy," I say defensively.

Violet gives me a look. "Uh, she knows an insane amount about aquatic animals and can rhyme off statistics like a Beat poet. Also, as a nerd, I can easily identify other nerds—and she is definitely one. It's too bad they can't put her in something other than beige, because she's also super gorgeous. You should invite her along. Introducing her to your friends will go a long way toward getting you into her pants—if that's your plan, anyway."

"I don't know if that's a good idea."

"Why not? When was the last time you went out with someone, Lisa?" Violet looks like she's about to start in on me about dating. It wouldn't be the first time in the past year.

At one point Violet and the rest of the girls mentioned setting me up with one of Poppy's massage therapist friends I'd been interested in back when I first came to Chicago. But I wasn't in the right headspace, and I didn't want to make things awkward or mess up a friendship if things didn't work out.

"Nerdy tour guide is the Alaska girl from last summer." Alex passes me the flask behind her back.

"Wait, what? She's Alaska girl? That's so awesome!" Violet jumps up and down once with excitement. It quickly turns into a grimace, and she grabs on to her boobs. I look away because Violet, for being as small as she is, has a huge rack, and she's currently wearing a shirt that shows off a significant amount of cleavage, and all the jumping and self-groping only draws more attention to it. Also, I don't want Alex to catch me looking.

"Yeah, I don't know if awesome is how I would describe this situation."

"Why not? It's like fate." She grabs Alex by the shirt and tips her head back so she can look up at him. "Just like when you accidentally let your nerd hang out when you mentioned how I was reading Fielding at a hockey game. My beaver took the reins that night."

He gazes down at her, wearing a half smile, all the fucking love in the world oozing out of them like freaking rainbows. Actually, I think he might be looking down her top. "Best damn night of my life."

I'm about to ask them if they want some privacy, but Violet returns her attention to me. "You have to go talk to her."

"It's not that simple."

"Of course it's that simple. Why wouldn't it be?"

"Apparently she lied about her job," Alex tells her.

Violet frowns. "Why would you do that?"

I shrug. "Because I'm an idiot. She didn't know who I was, and it was kind of nice being a regular person for a few weeks, you know what I mean?"

"So what kind of job did you tell her you have?"

"I told her I was an alpaca farmer, which would've been true if I didn't play professional hockey."

Her frown deepens. "That's an oddly specific lie."

"My parents were alpaca farmers."

Her nose wrinkles. "Really. How did I not know that?"

"It doesn't come up much in conversation, I guess?"

"Okay, so you lied about your job—no big deal, right? Unless you lied about something else?"

I scrub a hand over my mouth and mutter, "My name."

"I'm sorry, did you say your name? Why lie about that?"

"Well, like I said, she didn't recognize me, and it wasn't like I made up a fake one. I just gave her my nickname instead."

She blinks a few times. "You told her your name was Lisa?"

"No, I told her it was Lali, which is what my dad always called me and what my brother and sister still call me now. So it wasn't totally a lie. I mean, my name is pretty uncommon. Shit. I handled this all wrong, and now she's going to look me up and see all the bunny crap."

"So was it just that you didn't want her to know you used to let the puck bunnies use you like their personal dildo?"

"No. That wasn't it. I mean, now it's obviously going to be an issue, but I just wanted to be normal for a few weeks. And now she knows I lied to her about my job and my name, so I'm pretty sure she doesn't want anything to do with me. And even if she's willing to talk to me, once she realizes what else I've left out she'll probably never want to speak to me again."

This fuckup is on me. I kept putting off telling her the truth, maybe in part because I hoped that if she fell for me the way I fell for her, by the time I finally told her what I really did for a living, it wouldn't matter.

"Well, that's a complication, since you're still obviously hung up on her."

"Yeah. I have her number, though, so that's good, right?"

"If she'll answer your calls, sure," Alex says.

"And what happens when she finds out about my personal relationship history?"

"You mean that you used to be a manwhore?" Violet asks.

"Yeah. That."

Violet puts a hand on my shoulder, her expression serious. "If it's meant to be, she'll get over it—as long as you didn't give her some kind of lasting STD as a gift."