Sara was relieved to finally be alone. As much as she new her friends wanted to be there to help and support her, she needed space. Emotions were still something she preferred to deal with privately, especially when she struggled to make sense of them. And right now, she was struggling.

It felt like her head was swimming. She knew it was a combination of exhaustion, overwhelm, recovery and what she had just been told, but that didn't make it any easier to make sense of it all. While she knew she had some privacy and was unlikely to be interrupted in the next little while, she dropped her head to the pillow and simply let her thoughts flow with no attempt to analyse or change them. It didn't take long before tears were running down her cheeks even though she honestly couldn't say what it was that was causing them. She didn't feel particularly devastated (although that surprised her), but there was a definite sadness present. As her wandering thoughts bounced between Grissom, being unable to have a child, and the reality of her hospitalisation, it felt like her brain was playing a multi court tennis match with a dozen balls and all she could do was simply allow them to bounce around, unable to follow any one in particular but being aware of the chaos around her. As her tears went from a silent light trickle to a steady stream, the balls seemed to coalesce into one single thought and event that hit her with such a force the wind was knocked out of her and she struggled to breathe.

For the first time in months, the pain from losing what would be her only child hit her like a freight train. She had so carefully filed away her emotions and memories, but they were exploding like a bomb had gone off. Her quiet tears quickly turned into sobs. She cried until there was no energy left in her, and she curled up in a ball and fell asleep.

When Brass and Grissom left Sara they had expected it to only be a few minutes before they were allowed to return. They waited patiently as the nurse left flashing them a smile and a thumbs up, and continued to wait while Dr. Mark spoke to Sara. Both were becoming increasingly impatient and anxious after 20 minutes had passed, but when Dr. Mark emerged and they stood to go back in, he shook his head at them and gestured for them to follow him.

"I told Sara about the surgery." He explained.

"Why didn't you wait for us to be there with her?" Grissom interrupted.

"I asked if she wanted you to come back in while we talked and she declined." Dr. Mark told him gently. "And when I left she asked for some time alone. She suggested that you go home, Mr. Brass, and get some sleep. And she asked for some space and time alone for now. She will let a nurse know when she's ready for visitors and for her physical therapy to start." He said, watching the concerned men in front of him.

"I'm not sure it's a good idea for her to be alone right now." Grissom said.

"I agree. But it's what she has asked for, and I think for now we need to respect that. She's had a lot happen that has been out of her control. This is one tiny way we can start letting her feel like she's in charge again." He gently told them. "And I promise we won't let it go on for too long. If she hasn't asked for someone in an hour or two, a psychologist will check in with her. But for now, I'd like to do as she asked and let her have some space to process the news."

"How did she take it?" Brass asked him.

"She was very careful to not show any emotion." The doctor told him. "It was obvious she knew there was more than we had told her, but I don't think we will know for a few days how much it will affect her."

"We may never know." Grissom said sadly. "Sara is very good at keeping her feelings to herself."

"She did want to know who else knew. I told her that to the best of my knowledge the two of you were the only ones. If anyone else knows or suspects, I would advise you tell her. And maybe tell them to not bring it up or discuss it unless Sara does."

"That's a good plan." Brass agreed.

"So what can we do for her now?" Grissom asked, wanting nothing more than to rush into Sara's room to comfort her.

"Let her have her space." The doctor told him. "And be there for her when she will let you." Grissom bit back the urge to yell that Sara would never let anyone be there for her and sighed instead.

"She mentioned she wanted some of her own clothes this morning." Brass said. "Why don't you get a key from Nick and go to her place to pick up a few things for her?"

"I still have my key." Grissom told him without thinking.

"Well, there you go. Go home and pick up something comfortable for her to wear. And anything else she might be missing." He suggested.

"That's a good idea." Dr. Mark agreed. "Comfortable clothing that won't be difficult for her to put on and take off. And whatever else you think might make her feel a bit more secure and comfortable here until we can send her home." Grissom nodded, agreeing but quietly anxious about returning to the home they once shared.

"Ok, that sounds like a good idea. Jim, you go home and get some rest. I'll call Catherine and update her and she can update everyone else."

"I'll see you tonight, then." Brass said, leaving Grissom with the doctor. "Call me if she needs anything."