By the time Catherine had finished helping Sara with her stretches, Sara was doing them independently while Catherine did them herself standing next to her. After much badgering, Grissom had finally agreed to do them as well. What had begun awkwardly now had all three of them amused and laughing.
"I think Sara's in better shape now than you are." Catherine told Grissom as he struggled to bring his knee to his chest.
"Yes, well, I believe that's always been the case." He told Catherine pointedly. "Why should it be any different today?"
"Maybe because she's recovering from surgery?" Catherine teased.
"He was in better shape than I was a few days ago." Sara added.
"Only because you were unconscious, dear." Grissom told her as he sat down, conceding defeat.
"I think after that, we need some pizza." Catherine told them. "Where do you want to order from?"
"What about that Italian place that opened just before you left?" Sara suggested. "Greg will know their number. He should be awake soon."
"Sounds good. I'll sort out the pizza, you let Brass, Nick and Greg know what time you want them here. I'm going to go home to shower and change first so I'll be back in maybe 2 hours? You can let me know if anything changes."
"OK. I'll tell them 7 then?" Sara suggested. "So they'll be up, but it won't be too late here. I think I'm supposed to be back in my room by 8 or 9." Catherine nodded.
"OK, see you around 6:30-7 then." Catherine gave a final wave, then left Grissom and Sara alone together for the second time that day.
"How are you feeling?" Grissom asked her gently, reaching to hold her hand as he had when she was unconscious.
"I'm fine." Sara told him, and he quirked an eyebrow at her. "OK, I want to go home. And I'm frustrated at how slowly things are going."
"You've only been awake for a few days. Your body needs time to recover, it's been through a lot." Grissom reminded her.
"And I'd rather do that at home, where I have privacy. And my own bed, and my own shower, and my own everything."
"We will get you home soon. But to do that you need to make sure you don't overdo it. You need to let your body rest and recover." He told her and she huffed. "I know you aren't used to slowing down or taking breaks, but right now that's what you need to do." He reminded her as he squeezed her hand. When he looked up at her again, he was surprised to see tears forming in her eyes.
"I don't want to." She said so quietly he could barely hear her. "I want to be back at work. I need a distraction, I don't want time to think or to feel."
"Oh honey." He stood and gently nudged her over to the far side of the bed before crawling up next to her and wrapping his arms around her. "I know. I've been doing the same thing. But maybe... maybe that's not helping either of us." He pulled her head to his chest and felt her curl around him, and leaned down to kiss the top of her head. "I think it might be time to stop running away from feeling."
"How can you forgive me?" Sara whispered. "It was my fault."
"No, it wasn't." Grissom told her firmly. "None of what happened was your fault. I should have been here. Jim told me what happened with McKeen. If I had been here, I could have helped. You wouldn't have been under so much pressure, and all alone."
"If I had..."
"No more ifs. We can't change what happened. But it wasn't your fault, Sara. You didn't do anything wrong."
"Then why did you stay away?" She asked him with a pained cry.
"Because I was scared." He admitted. "I was scared you wouldn't want to see me. I was scared that it was my fault, that something was wrong with me. When you said you wanted to try again, all I could think was that you deserved better. You should find someone younger, someone healthier. We tried for so long and it just didn't happen... I was convinced that it was my fault and if you could find someone else you would be happier." Sara lifted her head off his chest to look at him.
"How could I be happier with someone who wasn't you?" She asked him. "It wasn't just about wanting a baby. I wanted to raise a child with you. I wanted to do this together."
"I'm so sorry. I just wanted you to be happy. I thought... I thought you'd be happier with someone else."
"But you didn't even ask what I wanted." Sara told him. "Why didn't you talk to me?"
"I didn't want to hurt you more than I already had." He admitted. "I was scared." Sara nodded and remained silent, not knowing what to say. Grissom held her closer, and for the second time that day his tears mixed with hers as they cuddled together.
"Are you going to stay?" Sara asked him, her voice barely even a whisper.
"Yes." He told her confidently. "I'm staying. I can get my own apartment if you would prefer that. I can come back to the lab, or work at the university. Whatever will be easiest for you. Whatever you want."
"Come home." She told him. "I need you."
"I need you too." He told her, and gently lifted her chin with his finger. Looking into her eyes, he slowly brought their faces closer together and hesitated, but then she closed the gap and gently kissed him.