December 1935
Looking at her reflection in the mirror, Peggy heaved a big sigh. Her ugly black boots were glaringly obvious, especially in contrast to the pale green dress she wore. Her dress, too, had seen better days, but at least it was somewhat fashionable. It was the only thing that was!
Her brown hair, unable to hold a curl to save her life, was tied back into a messy braid. She wished the house had electricity- then she could try her friend Amy's electric curling iron. Maybe that would help her hair cooperate. But even if it did, it wouldn't matter. Her skin was far too tanned, even in the dead of winter, to be beautiful. She wished, not for the first time, that she had taken after her mother with her fair Norwegian roots. She wished she looked more like Dottie- a perfect blond, blue eyed doll. Speaking of-
"Do you want some lipstick, Peggy?" Dottie asked as she horned into her space. Dottie leaned forward into the mirror and smeared some deep red lipstick over her lips.
"Dottie! You're only fourteen! You're too young for that!" Peggy cried, thoroughly scandalised. "Where did you get that, anyway?"
Dottie stepped back to admire herself, primping her perfectly curled hair. "I got it from Mother's room."
Peggy was sceptical. "Mother doesn't wear makeup."
Dottie rolled her eyes. "All right, I borrowed it from the general store. I'll give it back."
"Dorothy Ann!" Peggy cried. "You-" she dropped her voice quickly- "stole it?"
"I said I'll give it back!" Dottie said. "I've got to look pretty, don't I? I don't wanna be an old maid like you!"
"Eighteen does not an old maid make," Peggy said. "And you're going to confess to Mr. Bauer and pray he doesn't tell Mother or Dad!"
"I will, I will," Dottie promised. She twirled in her dress and frowned. "Why can't we have nice things? Nora just got two new dresses a month ago."
"Never mind what Nora has. Be grateful for what you have," Peggy scolded. Although she, herself, often felt envious of the relatively rich Millers, she never mentioned it. It was too close to complaining. Besides, the only reason the Millers were rich was, supposedly, due to some less than legal activities during prohibition. Peggy's family might have been poor, but at least they were honest.
Well, mostly honest. Dottie was going to land herself into a lot of trouble one day if she made 'borrowing' a habit. Peggy had half a mind to march her downstairs and make her confess to Mother. But she hoped that Dottie would do the right thing on her own.
BbbbbbAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRUUUUuuuuuUUUuuMMmp
Dottie groaned. "He loves that dumb horn, doesn't he?"
"At least he's getting better," Peggy said with a shrug. "But it's no wonder with all the practice he puts in."
BAARRUUUUUMP
"You would think he's sounding better. You don't know a thing about music!" Dottie cried. "The only way he's better is that now our ears don't bleed any time he plays! And, anyway, he doesn't sound any better right now," Dottie said. "In fact, he sounds worse than ever before!"
"Maybe he's just trying to tell us to hurry up," Peggy speculated. She gave herself one more look over in the mirror. As satisfied as she could possibly be, she nodded and grabbed Dottie's arm. "Come on, let's go."
The two girls hurried down the stairs and went into the living room. Dottie quickly grabbed her coat and scarf, and had her face covered just as Mother came into the room.
"Off to the dance?" Mother asked. The girls nodded. "All right, be safe. If it starts snowing too hard to come back, stay with the Nielsens, okay." Again they nodded.
"You look so pretty, Dottie," Alice said in awe. "I can't wait until I can go to a dance."
"Next year," Mother said.
"Dances, blech," Rebecca mumbled from the floor where she was playing with some blocks with Mary.
"All right, you better get going," Mother said. She grabbed Peggy's shoulders and gave her a quick kiss on the cheek. "Let me know if anything exciting happens."
Peggy tilted her head, confused. But she smiled and kissed her mother back. Then she grabbed her outside clothes and bundled up. Together, she and Dottie went out the front door. The truck was waiting for them, ready to go. Andrew was leaning against the driver's door, holding his trumpet and chatting with Dad.
"I wanted to play with the band tonight," Andrew said. "But I don't think I'm good enough yet. I have to keep practising, but I think I'm getting better. You know, maybe when I go away to school, I'll be in a big city and I can find someone there to give me lessons. Mr. Hagen said I shouldn't bother, but Conrad said he could teach me, but there's just never enough time to stay in town after school. And you know I spend a lot of time in the chemistry lab during lunch. I'd rather be there than practising my trumpet. Gosh, sometimes I wish I could just pause time and learn everything there is to know, and then-"
"There's enough hours in the day to do what's needed, Andrew," Dad interrupted. He turned as the girls came down the steps and smiled. "Hello, ladies. Ready to go?" They nodded. Dad took Andrew's trumpet from him, then went around to the passenger door and held it open. He helped Dottie and Peggy in, then leaned in just as Andrew took his spot in the driver's seat. "You be careful driving, Andrew. The snow's not too bad, but don't take any chances. If it gets too rough, turn around and come home. And stay with the Nilsen's tonight, even if it's not snowing."
Andrew scowled. "The Nilsens? But shouldn't I be home to do my chores in the morning."
"Don't worry about that," Dad said. "Just be safe. Love you, I do, girls. Have fun."
"We will!" Dottie chirped.
"And, Peggy… say hello to Freddy for me." Peggy blushed and nodded.
Dad shut the door and jogged up onto the porch. Andrew put the truck into gear and started driving down to the road. Peggy looked back to see Dad still standing outside. He would probably wait until they were out of sight before heading inside.
The three Carters settled in for the drive.
"Just what is wrong with the Nilsens, Andy?" Dottie asked. Andrew grumbled something unintelligible. "What?"
"It's Mary Jane! She won't leave me alone!"
"She likes you," Peggy said.
"Aw, come on, don't say that. She's just a kid!"
"Not for long, though," Peggy replied. "She'll be old enough for the harvest dance next year. And, anyway, it wouldn't kill you to be nice."
"I'm always nice," Andrew insisted. "Maybe that's the problem. Maybe I ought to be mean to her. Maybe she'll take the hint."
"Someone with a dog face like yours ought to be grateful any girl likes him," Dottie teased, nudging her brother with her elbow.
"I don't have a dog face!" Andy protested.
Dottie shrugged. "Maybe, maybe not. But you know who doesn't have a dog face? Freddy Pelzer. Do you think he's ever going to ask you to marry him, Peggy? You know you're not getting any younger."
Peggy's eyes grew wide and her cheeks burned.
"I like Freddy," Andrew said, saving Peggy from answering Dottie's impertinent question. Although, truthfully, that probably hadn't been his intention. "You know he came to the house last week. I think he was talking with Dad. Don't know what about. Maybe he's hoping to get hired for the summer. Kind of early to be discussing that, though. And, anyway, of course Dad will hire him. He's a good worker. And he's smart, too. He keeps talking about going to school one day but money is tight. Gosh, I hope I have enough money to go to school when the time comes. I want to go right after highschool. I don't want to have to wait until I'm old like Freddy. Mr. Larsen says my grades are good enough that I can get a scholarship if I do just as well next year. I wish I could take chemistry, but Dad says business is the best choice, so I can run the farm when I get older. You know, I've been thinking-"
Peggy let Andrew ramble. Dottie tried to get a few words in, but once Andrew was on a tangent, it was hard to stop him.
An hour later, Andrew was talking about which chemicals were needed to make fireworks when the truck stopped in the highschool parking lot. Andrew hopped out and went around to open the doors for his sisters. Dottie's feet had barely touched the ground before she was hurrying to the school. Andrew looped his arm through Peggy's and together the two oldest Carter siblings followed her.
Dottie was already dancing with someone by the time Andrew and Peggy had checked their coats.
"Andrew! Over here!" someone hollered. A group of boys were hovering around the punch bowl, waving him over.
"I'll see you, Peggy," Andy said as pulled his arm from hers and went off to join his friends.
Peggy stayed back and looked around the gymnasium, admiring all the Christmas decorations. Even in the midst of this economic depression, there was still joy to be found. Dances were a great way to forget about worries and were being swung around, laughing without a care in the world, while boys competed with each other to see who could get the prettiest girls to say yes to them. It didn't matter that their shoes were worn or that their clothes were ragged. The cheery music from the band made everyone want to tap their toes and dance.
"Guten Abend, Margaret."
Peggy looked over to see Freddy Pelzer had appeared beside her.
"Oh. Hi." Peggy mentally cursed the heat which had once more taken up residence in her cheeks.
Fredrich Pelzer was a tall, handsome man with dark hair, blue eyes, and a pleasant smile that showcased his perfect teeth. Despite living in America for the last seven years, he still bore a strong German accent, but his voice was gentle and kind.
Ever since arriving in Crabapple Junction, Freddy had worked for the Carters during the harvest. He also went to the same church. For the most part, their encounters had been brief and impersonal. That all changed at Peggy's first dance, over four years ago. Being shy, she had hidden in the corner, too afraid to do anything but watch everyone else having a good time. She stayed there for at least an hour before he approached her. At first, she thought the handsome man, six years older than herself, had been playing a joke when he asked her to dance. But he had been so nice and sweet that that could not have possibly been the case. No one else had danced with her that night- some stupid boy had called her a 'dirty squaw', sending her back into her corner- but that one dance with Fredrich had given her the courage she needed to attend the next dance, despite the humiliation the insult had caused her.
Since then, the boys had smartened up and would ask her to dance, but the first song always went to Freddy. Over the past year, however, their tradition had taken a bit of a turn. The first dance led into the second song and then the third. And now their interactions extended beyond the quarterly dances. Now, he sat beside her at church. Afterwards they would stay behind and have a picnic lunch (outside during the summer, inside the church during the winter). Then he would drive her home. Neither spoke much but when they did, Peggy found the conversations interesting and meaningful. It was safe to say that Peggy was in love with him. But did he love her? She couldn't be sure if he was, or if he was just being a nice guy.
"Will you dance with me, Liebling?"
"Always," Peggy replied. Freddy took her hand and led her to the floor. He held her close as the music slowed.
"It is a shame the Bablers are not here," Freddy remarked after dancing in silence for a few moments.
"Oh?" Peggy peeled her cheek off Freddy's shoulder and looked around. Sure enough, she didn't see anyone from the Babler family.
"Ja. They had to move to the city."
Peggy's heart sank. "Another foreclosure?"
Fredrich nodded. "Your father has managed his farm well, though. I think you will be all right. But it is a poor time to be a farmer."
Peggy didn't answer, instead resting her head back on Freddy.
"Education is the future," Freddy continued. "That is why I am going to move as well. I have a job lined up in Minneapolis, and then I will apply for school."
"Oh?" Peggy didn't look up, feeling her heart crack at the news. "Andy said something about that."
"It will be hard. Very hard. Long hours will be spent working with not much time for anything else. And there will be little money for anything, even the necessities."
"You will make it work. You're a hard worker."
"Yes. I… it does not seem right to ask you to give up the stability of your father's home for a life like that."
Peggy furrowed her brow and stayed quiet.
"But I must." Fredrich gently grabbed her chin and moved her face so that he could look her in the eye. "Because I very much love you. And I want you to marry me and come with me."
Oh. So he did love her.
Peggy's heart burst with a warmth that went down to her toes. "You know I've never been afraid of hard work. And I very much love you, too."
They were about to kiss when, suddenly, a very off-key trumpet sounded over the dance floor. Peggy whipped her head over to see Andrew on the stage, playing along with the band and looking like he was having the time of his life. The others in the band seemed to be bearing their new member with a mixture of fondness and exasperation.
Peggy couldn't help but laugh. "A dog with a bone, that kid. You sure you want him for a brother-in-law?"
Freddy laughed with her. "I would have a thousand such brothers if required."
BARUMP BARUUUUUMP
All eyes were on Andrew when Peggy and Freddy shared their first kiss.
Mother, of course, was ecstatic when she heard the news. Dad gave an approving nod, saying that Fredrich was a good man who would work hard. Andrew was a little perplexed- does that mean you're going to leave?- Dottie was insanely jealous- I can't wait for my turn!- and the other girls were excited- Can I be the flower girl? I want to be a bridesmaid! Oh this is so romantic! Rebecca was indifferent- Freddy's okay, I guess.
"Oh, Mother, I'm so happy," Peggy said, holding Mother's hands in hers. "Margaret Jane Pelzer! Do you think we can go into the city and buy a dress?!" Peggy was a simple girl, but in her heart she had always dreamed of wearing a dress like the ones she saw at the movies or in magazines. In particular, she remembered seeing actress Jill Esmond in her beautiful gown and halo crown. "I know, I know it'll cost some money, but-" Peggy stopped herself when she saw her mother's face fall. "I mean… it's a special occasion, isn't it and, I just thought… We could make a dress! A nice silk one and we can dye it afterwards so I can use it again and-"
"Margaret," Mother sighed.
"We'll find some money," Dad said.
Mother turned a hard look on Dad. "From where? You already dipped into Andrew's school money to buy a cow off the Karlsens. And another cow off the Bablers! And where are we going to get the money to feed those cows anyway?! And the tractor needs to be repaired before Spring! And what about Christmas? I suppose it's another year without presents?"
"Ila, we'll talk about it later," Dad said.
"No, now! We've lasted this long, but we're haemorrhaging money right and left! How long are we supposed to keep that up?"
"Ila! Our room. Now."
Dad grabbed Mother's hand and led her out of the living room. The children were left in shock. Their parents never spoke about money in front of them. And, while times were certainly tough, they had always had enough. But they were all aware of how many farms had been lost in the last few years.
Peggy felt sick with guilt.
"Are… are we going to lose the farm?" Alice asked.
"No, no way," Andy said firmly. "Dad wouldn't let that happen. We might have to tighten our belts, but it'll be okay. I don't have to go to school. That was a pipe dream anyway, wasn't it? I'll stay here and help out. Or I'll get a job in the city. Or… join the army or something and send my earnings home. I think they'll let you join up at sixteen. But I'll lie about my age if I have to. And, uh, Peggy, you can take in some mending. Oh, but you'll be getting married and leaving us. Well then, Dottie, you can take in some mending."
"Or I can get married to someone who's rich!" Dottie said. "Or not rich. But if I get married, that will be one less mouth for Dad and Mother to worry about."
"You're not getting married," Andrew said. "Come on, let's all put our heads together, we can come up with some way to make money!"
The Carter children gathered round, throwing out ideas, except Peggy, who slipped away from the group. Without bothering with a coat, she went out the back door and ran out to the barn. There, she climbed up into the loft and threw herself into a pile of hay. Tears sprang from her eyes. She cried for the trouble she caused, the guilt she felt, and, selfishly, for her dreams of a beautiful wedding dress.
She didn't know how long she was crying when she heard the barn door open and the ladder up to the loft creak.
"Peg?"
Peggy barely looked up at Andrew before burying her face back into her hands. She felt something warm fall over her and peeked out to see Andrew had covered her with a blanket. Then, he sat down beside her.
"I'm so stupid," Peggy sobbed.
"I don't think so."
Peggy shook her head. "No. I am."
"Because you want a nice dress to get married in?"
Again Peggy shook her head. "I shouldn't have said anything. It was stupid. I shouldn't have complained."
Andrew was quiet for a moment. "But you weren't. Peggy, you never complain. Ever. I haven't heard you complain once in my whole life. Wanting something nice isn't complaining."
Peggy sighed and leaned against her brother. "It might as well have been. Now our folks are fighting and everyone's worried. I should have-" She sucked in a breath, feeling herself about to cry again.
Andy put his arm around her and pulled her in tighter. Her normally chatty brother didn't offer any more words. Instead, he just held her while she cried.