Today was a super-duper good day!

I got a new ki-mo-no that Kaa-san and Tou-san said would make all the boys notice me, which was super important.

Both my nee-sans also got new ki-mo-nos. Aiko-nee-san and Tomi-nee-san were super-duper pretty! They were gonna wear their pretty ki-mo-no to the A-ca-de-my to-mor-row so that a clan boy would fall in love with them and marry them.

I couldn't wait to go to the A-ca-de-my too! I would be the bestest ninja and get the bestest boy!

I smiled as I lay down and went to sleep.

…

I woke up to rumbling. Why was the ground shaking? There was something wrong.

There was a giant red monster in the distance. It felt like paindeathhatredanger-

I was screaming

-coughingfeverlonelycovid-

Someone was holding me and running

-riotviolencequarantinesickness-

Darkness

…

I drifted in and out for a few days. I wasn't somewhere I knew. Kaa-san (mom?) kept trying to get a medic-nin to look at me but they were busy (was there some kind of play?). In the meantime, my big sisters held me a lot (I'm the big sister. Why is everyone so big?).

There was a lot of people crying and weeping. Others were just quiet. After a while everyone went outside. Tou-san held me while an old man talked to everyone (dad? Why's your hair so dark?).

Then we went back home to the teahouse (my house is green. What is this place?). My room was still a mess so mommy didn't have to take out the bed again (this isn't my room).

"I love you Hana" she said as she slid the door closed.

Hana?

Did she call me Hana?

But my name

My name

My name is-

…

I woke up in the morning with a pounding headache that made me regret returning to consciousness. Blurgh.

Unfortunately, I knew myself well enough by now that falling back asleep wasn't an option. Not to mention I can't recall having such a bad headache before…

Wait, do I have covid!?

I sat bolt upright, scrambling for my phone at the foot of my bed. Except I wasn't in a bed. I was in a weird bedroll thing-a futon. I was in my futon, that used to belong to my big sisters. The big sisters that I both knew intimately and was also absolutely certain I didn't have before.

My headache doubled. I groaned, putting my head in my hands.

Ok, deep breaths. In 1-2-3-4, out 1-2-3-4, in 1, 2, 3, 4, out 1, 2, 3, 4. I can do this. Aside from my headache, I'm not hurt. I'm also not dreaming, because I know what dreaming feels like enough, and I don't feel this much pain when I'm asleep.

So. Where am I, how did I get here, and why do my memories insist that this is my room and I have two big sisters. Those are the questions I need to focus on.

I feel like a horror video game character…

I open my eyes and cautiously get out of the bed roll/futon thingy. I was in a small room with what looked like tatami mat floors and walls that were half wood paneling and half… plaster? There was a small window with purple curtains on the wall above my futon and by the foot a closet. There were a few decorative fans on the walls and two paper lanterns hanging from the ceiling. And it was all incredibly familiar and strange at the same time.

I… I knew this place. That fan was a gift for my third birthday. Those lanterns were from my dad's business trip.

My vision swam. I sat back down on the futon, hand over eyes, and waited for it to pass.

Okayyyy… something weird is going on here. I mean, weirder than everything else. Ugh, nevermind.

I should check the outside. I padded over to the window, but whoever made it made the sill high up I could barely see over it. This whole room was very tall.

Peering into the closet just revealed what looked like stacked cloth.

Maybe getting out of this room would be helpful.

I padded over to the door which was also really, really tall for some reason. Also it was a sliding door. Luckily, I had had a sliding door before so I had some idea of how to open it quietly. Press slowly to see which way it tended to lean. If it leaned outward press open slowly. If not, it would swing out and then you could open it. Move slowly and cautiously. Close with a fingernail over the edge and stop before it hits the frame. Fortunately for me, the door seemed well oiled, or sanded or whatever, and was fairly quiet.

Now I was in a hall, with wooden floors and the same wood panel/plaster combo walls as the room I was in.

At one end of the hall was another really high window and at the other end was a staircase… that went to the living room if my weird sense of familiarity was correct. From the stairs I heard the soft sounds of talking.

Trying to remember what I'd read about moving quietly I walked to the stairs. The very tall stairs, that reminded me of university bleachers. I did a sort of careful scooch-slide down the stairs to minimize the chances of slipping and making noise as I got closer to the talking.

"-really, I don't know what the Hokage was thinking! The little monster will kill us all!" said a woman's voice that made a part of me go mom?

"Not for a while though, its still in a baby's body," said a man's voice, this one a voice that went with dad in my mindscape. "We have time. I'm worried about business, no one is looking to celebrate or go to a teahouse right now."

My head started to hurt more. And it made it difficult to concentrate.

"People at the academy are scared," said a girl. "And lots of the Uchiha still haven't returned."

There was a spike of pain and my foot slipped. "Ouch!"

"Hana!" said the woman-Kaa-san-mom as she came into view. "I didn't hear you wake up. Are you okay?"

"My head hurts," I mumbled.

She clucked at me and picked me up, my arms automatically going around her neck. "I'll get some pain medicine. Then I'll see about getting a medic-nin over here," she said. "They must've gotten most of the urgent stuff done by now you'd think."

Medic-nin? Weird term, weren't they called MAs? But no, my weird sense said they were ninja? That focused on healing?

"Don't worry!" said the one of the two young girls in the living room Mom entered. "Once I marry one of the clan ninja we'll be the ones at the front of the line!" she declared.

I ignored Mom cooing at her as I blinked trying to reconcile what I was hearing. Ninja? Ninja weren't real-

My headache spiked again as the other sense insisted that yes they were real and my sisters were learning to become them so they could marry a clan ninja like the Uchiha or the Hyuuga-

Vertigo gripped me as I recognized those names. "Konoha..?" I murmured.

"Konoha is fine dear," Mom said. "The late Hokage-sama protected us all."

Naruto. I was in Naruto.

I swear if those reality-shifting Tiktok teenagers were right I'm gonna be so effing pissed.

AN: Sorry the first upload was wrong.