Tales Of The Flame & The Axe: A Shooting Star Falls Story
Part Seven: Come Clean
"Gnomes…" Tambry said with disdain as she furrowed her brow. "Like the little statue ones that people put in their gardens?" Alessandra inquired. "No… These are the real deal… And I absolutely hate them…" the violet haired woman replied to her. "Mom… You and Dad both have told me to never say I hate something…" Lucas stated in a confused tone. "Y-Yeah… But this is one of the rare instances where it's alright to…" she assured her son. "Why? Did they do something to ya' Aunt Tambers?" Mabel asked. "Yeah… You could say that…" the olive skinned thirtysomething said as she narrowed her eyes; recalling the event as if it had happened just yesterday. "Well? What did they do?" the curious redhead continued her line of questioning. "It all started the summer before we lost your Aunts…" she began as they all took a seat around the unlit campfire. "I-I was eighteen and felt like the world was mine… That I could do anything I wanted to. The only thing was that I had just gotten out of a bad relationship and back then, I was the kind of girl who always had to have a boyfriend… I-In retrospect… I-I maybe should have taken some time to work on myself… But that's a story for another time… Anyway… I was on this online dating app called 'Tender' where you pretty much saw someone in PhotoModded profile image and read a short blurb about them…" she began as the teens looked on. "That sounds incredibly shallow…" the usually reserved Grendy commented, much to the surprise of Tambry. "Trust me… It totally was…" the somewhat embarrassed woman replied as a wave of shame crashed over her; a bit blindsided by the kind girl's brutal honesty.
"So anyway… I saw this guy named 'Jeff' on there and he seemed to be a pretty good looking guy and his blurb made me laugh. I swiped right and we started messaging. He was witty… And charming… And looked hella hot. I should have known that it was too good to be true, but I was lonely and wanted to hang out with someone new" Tambry continued as Lucas shifted uncomfortably in his seat; thoughts of his mother looking for someone to hook up with, albeit many years ago, was off-putting to the teen boy. "So, he said to meet up in the State Park one day and sure enough… I did. I guess they chloroformed me, because when I came to I was smack dab in the middle of a wedding ceremony. Instead of the dreamy guy I had talked to online, I was instead surrounded by dozens of little men with beards and pointy hats" she recalled before taking a moment to breathe. "You must have been so scared!" Courtney said with fright. Although she had put on a somewhat brave front earlier, she was actually terrified of the pint-sized creatures. "I was... They were about to conclude the ceremony when Dipper, Mabel, Wendy, Nate, Lee and Thompson all came to my rescue. Armed with a leaf blower, Aunt Mabel was able to scatter them while Wendy untied me. I'll never forget that day as long as I live…" she concluded as the teens sat stunned at the story they had just been told.
"So… Why do you think they were tearing through our campsite like that?" Mateo asked; breaking the stunned silence of the group. "Dunno… Probably just hungry or something" Tambry dismissed as she stood up from the campfire and walked back towards her tent. "What if they were after that book?!" Alessandra wondered aloud as she swung her short legs back and forth. "Yeah… What is that thing anyway?" Lucas agreed. "I already told you dude… It's one of your Mom's trashy romance novels…" Courtney said with a chuckle. "NO IT'S NOT!" both Tambry and her son replied in unison; anger coming from the young man, while the violet haired woman's reply dripped with embarrassment. "Jeez… Touchy…" the redhead replied as she picked up the tome and dusted it off. Opening it up, she read the cursive handwriting that adorned the inner cover. "Multi-Dimensional Spellbook… Maybe this is what they were after..." the ginger preteen thought aloud as she held it up for all to see. "Maybe… I mean, the only way they'll ever get a Queen is by conjuring one up with a magic spell or something…" Tambry quipped. "Pfft… Magic is hella fake…" Lucas replied. "That's what you think…" Pacifica said under her breath as a smug smile formed on her face. "People say there have been lots of weird things that have happened in this town over the years… Why couldn't there be a magic spellbook? I mean, we just saw some freaking real life gnomes for crying out loud!" Grendy argued. The group of teens took a moment to think about what the usually meek teen had said. As usual, the lanky brunette was the voice of reason. "That does make a lot of sense…" Lucas relented as the teens began to get the campfire going; the sun beginning to set on the strange day in the forest.
Dipper and Wendy's flight had arrived in Vancouver early in the afternoon. Instead of the sunny and clear conditions they had left behind in Gravity Falls, the couple was greeted with cloudy skies and light drizzle. After taking a cab to their hotel, the two lovers proceeded to reignite their flames of passion. Clothes and inhibitions were shed as the two became one; their love making unrestrained as they had no fear of being interrupted by their children or anyone else for that matter. After a few goes, the sweaty and sore bodies of Wendy and her husband Mason collapsed onto the queen sized mattress; the duo soon falling fast asleep. A few hours later, Wendy began to stir in the large bed as the dying light of the late afternoon filtered through the blinds of the hotel room. For a brief moment, she had forgotten where she was and panic came over her; the woman hastily grabbing the bedsheets to conceal her nude form. The feeling of panic soon subsided as she remembered that she was on vacation with her husband. "Hey Dip… Wake up honey…" she whispered into her lover's ear; her hot breath tickling the slumbering chestnut haired man. A soft laugh came from his mouth as he began to stir in the spacious bed that had become a canvas on which they painted their portrait of love earlier. "I'm gonna go wash up… Then we can hit the town…" she informed her husband; playfully tapping him on his bare bottom before she arose from the bed and made her way to the bathroom. Dipper heard the door close and sat up in the bed; running his fingers through his hair as he recalled the fantastic start to his vacation.
Dipper put on a pair of blue jeans, a grey t-shirt emblazoned with a logo of a band he liked, and a black leather jacket. A pair of black and white skate shoes completed his look as he sat on the edge of the mattress. Wendy emerged from steam filled bathroom and sauntered back to the bedroom, where she spied her husband fully clothed and ready to go. "Somebody's an eager boy…" she said with a chuckle as she dropped the tan towel that had concealed her nakedness. Dipper could hardly believe that despite giving birth to twin girls that his wife's body was just about as slim and toned as when they had first met two decades prior. The tattoos that she had gotten over the years practically jumped off of her alabaster skin; a tapestry of her troubled past and promising future. In addition to the sleeve on her right arm she had commissioned following her suicide attempt, she eventually covered up the surgical scars under her arm with the tiny handprints of her then infant daughters and the date they were born. Unknown to him, the feisty redhead planned to pop her husband's ink cherry when they visited a famed shop on Sunday. Until then, he remained blissfully unaware of the slightly devilish plans his lover had in store for him.
Walking out into the cool air of the early evening, Dipper and Wendy walked hand in hand to the Granville District, where they had read about the abundant night life it had to offer. Free from the responsibilities of parenthood for the first time in over a decade, the couple decided to let loose and have a night of recklessness. The first bar they walked into had a stage off to the side, where a rock band was playing a set. Dipper ordered a few shots of Irish whiskey, while his wife had opted for a glass of straight vodka. It always amazed him how the young woman could knock back the burning liquid as if it were nothing more than the water it resembled. Feeling the buzz from the alcohol after a few moments, he grasped his wife's petite hand and led her toward the performance. For the next hour, the two lost themselves in the screaming guitar riffs and melodic vocals of the group. Although they were slightly older than most of the other revelers, Dipper and Wendy were able to hang with the rowdy twentysomethings that surrounded them and relive their concert going days once more.
The band finished their set and soon the married couple found themselves at the bar once again. Opting for some water to stay hydrated, the duo were about to leave for another bar when they were stopped by a clearly drunk woman. "I-I knows you f-from somewhere!" the raven haired girl stammered. A puzzled look formed on both Wendy and Dipper's face. Although they were under the influence of alcohol, the pair recognized that they weren't nearly as far gone as this woman. "You must be mistaken… W-We're not from around here…" Wendy replied as she grasped the hand of her lover just a little tighter. "No! Y-You're in that movie they're f-filming… Over on English Bay! Ocifer D-Down! Yeah! You're Jamie LeCroix! C-Can I have your autograph?!" she gushed to the thoroughly confused woman. "Just go with it Wen…" Dipper discreetly suggested to his wife. "Alright! You got me!" Wendy said with a chuckle. Although she was aware of the famous Hollywood actress, she thought that the two didn't resemble each other in the slightest. After signing a bar napkin and posing for a picture, the duo left the bar. "Jamie LeCroix! Ha! Yeah right!" Wendy laughed to herself. A curious Dipper pulled out his phone and searched Boggle for images of the actress. Much to his surprise, the young woman was a spitting image of his wife except for her dark brown hair and piercing blue eyes. "I dunno… I can totally see it…" Dipper said as he showed his wife the picture he had pulled up. "Well… I guess that makes one of us…" Wendy retorted as they continued down the sidewalk.
"Jamie! Jamie! Who's the arm candy?" a man's voice shouted out as a camera's flash went off and nearly blinded her. "I'm not Jamie LeCroix! My name is Wendy Pines!" she yelled back. "C'mon Jamie! Can I ask you a few questions?" the slender man asked as he stuck a video camera in her face. "Dude! She's not Jamie LeCroix! She's my wife! Wendy Pines!" Dipper replied with a bit of anger. "Okay! I get it! You're a method actor… But can you please answer a few questions for me?" the man insisted. "Ugh! Fine! Whatever!" she huffed as all three came to a stop on the sidewalk. "Jamie… What is it like to play such a strong female character such as Wendy Corduroy?" the man asked as a look of confusion came over both her and Dipper's face. "Character?!" she replied. "Yeah… Your movie 'Officer Down'… You star as rookie officer Wendy Corduroy on the worst day of her brief career. What is it like to pla-" he began to explain before the thirtysomething cut him off. "I-I don't know what kind of prank this is dude, but I am Wendy Corduroy-Pines and I can prove it…" she said in a firm tone as her petite hand retrieved her identification from the small clutch she carried. Holding it up so that the interviewer could see, his expression quickly changed from one of annoyance to that of amazement.
"Y-You're actually her! I-I'm so sorry!" the man apologized. "What's this all about?" asked a very confused and slightly agitated Dipper. "Well, they started filming the other day… I-I guess that hair and makeup did such a good job on Jamie that I couldn't tell you two apart… Once again… I'm truly sorry…" he explained. "Movie?!" both Dipper and Wendy exclaimed in unison. "Yeah… Officer Down… It's… Well… It's about what happened that day… H-How you were the only cop on duty and how you kept your cool to talk down a deranged criminal… You mean you didn't know?" the man asked with a bit of shock; certain that the person that the film was based on would be in the know about it. "Nope! W-Who the hell told them they could make a movie about my life?! That they could profit on both my and my husband's grief?!" she replied as a red hot rage began to consume her. "Look… I don't know… I'm just paparazzi… If I were you though… I'd go down to the set tomorrow and demand some answers. You're missing out on some serious dough…" the man answered as the couple shot him a nasty look. "What? You are… Anyway… Sorry to bother you…" he apologized one final time before walking away.
"I can't fucking believe it! Who the fuck would go and make a movie about what happened without talking to me or you?! I mean, can they even fucking do that?!" Wendy fumed as she punched an ornate lamppost that decorated the sidewalk; a move she instantly regretted as pain radiated throughout her hand and wrist. "I know… That's hella fucked up…" Dipper agreed. "Well… If I'm being mistaken for a famous Hollywood actress, I say we party like one…" Wendy said as a smirk formed on her face. The hazel eyed man knew the devious expression well and while he didn't know what she had in store, he knew that she was hell bent on doing it. "I mean… It's not that I'm angry about them doing a movie about me… I-It's just tha-" the redhead began before being interrupted by a group of college aged women. "OHMYGOD! Jamie LeCroix! C-Can we get a selfie?!" a short and somewhat rotund brunette asked. "Like, totally!" Wendy said in a sarcastic tone, which was lost on the group of adoring fans. After a few pictures in which Wendy discreetly brandished her middle finger, the crowd dispersed.
The married couple made their way to a second bar, this one more grungy and dank than the previous. Sauntering up the bar with a confident swagger, Wendy got the barkeep's attention. "Yeah… I'll take a glass of your finest vodka… neat" the redhead said as she swept a stray bit of hair behind her ear and winked. Dipper was unsure of what his wife was fixing to do, but decided to take in the show that was sure to take place. "I'm going to need your card…" he replied as the grizzled man held out his large calloused hand. "Excuse me?!" the ginger woman shot back. "Yeah… This stuff ain't cheap… I'm not about to let some chick just order this much without opening a tab…" he responded. "Don't you know who I am?!" Wendy shot back in an offended tone. "Nope. Don't care either lil' missy…" the man said without an ounce of care in his voice. "I'm Jamie Freakin' LeCroix! Famous Hollywood actress! I'm filming a movie here! Surely you've heard of me…" she shot back as Dipper put two and two together; a small smirk forming on his face. "OHMYGOSH! IT IS JAMIE!" a woman shouted over the drone of the alternative music that came from the aged sound system. "I liked your work in 'The Revengers'…" a rough looking biker commented before taking a swig from his large mug of beer.
The bartender pulled out his phone and did a quick search on the supposed actress. He was certain that the redhead was just trying to swindle him out of some top shelf booze and wanted to shut down the situation as quickly as possible. In his nearly twenty years of bartending, he had just about seen it all and he would be damned if he the younger woman could pull one over on him. Much to his surprise, the first image that popped up was that of a woman that was a dead ringer for the one that stood in front of him; save for her hairs color and length. "I'm sorry Miss LeCroix! I-I didn't know… It's on the house!" the man apologized as he quickly fulfilled her order, fearful that she would slam the business on her extensive social media network. "And anything he wants as well!" she commanded while pointing to her husband. Dipper didn't get to see this assertive side of his wife often these days, but when he did, he loved every bit of it. Taking his wife up on her offer, he glanced at the many glass bottles that lined the shelves. While there were a few choices that were enticing, one dusty bottle with a dark brown liquid caught his eye and intrigue filled his mind. "What's that on the top shelf? The dusty one?" he inquired. "T-That is not for sale…" the barkeep quickly replied. "Then why's it on the bar?" Dipper commented. Wendy watched the exchange with curiosity as she knew Dipper could be quite persuasive while not being too forthright with what he wanted. "I-It's there for decoration… A gift my grandfather received many years ago from a sailor as payment of a debt…" he once again answered. "Well… I think Ms. LeCroix made herself very clear… Didn't she?" Dipper shot back. A deep sigh was heard from the other side of the bar as the man relented and grabbed the bottle while muttering something about entitled millennials under his breath. Blowing off the dust, he placed both it and a shot glass in front of the chestnut haired man. 'Almann's Pure Irish Pot Still Whiskey' Dipper read as he lifted the bottle from the well-worn wooden bar to take a better look at it. After examining the bottle for a few moments, he realized that while Wendy had pretty much given him carte blanche on the bar, this was a family heirloom of the bartenders and it would be wrong for him to drink from it if she had no intent of paying the fair price for it.
"On second thought, I'll take the Royale Crown XR on the rocks…" Dipper requested as he handed the aged bottle back to the raven haired man. A look of thankfulness was briefly displayed on his face before being replaced by his gruff one. A few moments later, Wendy rejoined her husband at the bar. "So… What'd ya get?" she asked with a bit of a slur as the clear liquor had begun to affect her. "Some Royale Crown XR… I was gonna get whatever was in that old bottle at the top of the bar, but I could tell it meant a lot to the bartender…" the chestnut haired man replied. "Y-You're a good man…" Wendy said as she pecked her lover on his cheek. "So… Any idea what you're gonna do tomorrow?" Dipper asked as his drink arrived. "Nah… I dunno. I mean, I kinda feel bad for running up this huge tab for Jamie. I mean, she's just an actress. It's not like she was the one who is making the movie… She's just doing her job" the redhead replied as her husband took a long sip from his glass of whiskey. "Yeah… That's true. We should go back to the room and find out more about this movie… See who is behind all this. At least we didn't go nuts with this whole revenge thing though…" Dipper commented. "Yeah… About that…" the ginger woman said as she shifted uncomfortably in her seat. "What'd ya do?" her husband inquired as he once again held the glass of caramel colored liquid to his lips and took a long sip. "I-I… Well… I kinda told the whole bar that shots were on me… Err… Jamie LeCroix…" the auburn haired woman said with a bit of shame in her voice.
Dipper took a moment to process what his wife had just said. While he was certain that whatever the cost would turn out to be was mere pocket change to the starlet, he was nonetheless disappointed in her behavior. "Look… I know that was pretty shitty of me… B-But in my defense… I am ripped off my ass right now…" the ginger woman commented as she leaned on her husband. Having just consumed the one glass of whiskey at the first bar and a second at the one they currently found themselves in, Dipper had a pretty good buzz going, but was much more composed than his wife. "Well… Let's go back to the hotel and sleep this off. Then in the morning, we can figure out who is trying to make a quick buck off of Mabel and Pacifica…" the brown haired man said as he stood up from his stool and helped Wendy off of hers. Dipper and Wendy were just about to exit into the cool summer evening of Vancouver, when the door opened and an auburn haired woman walked into the bar. Both she and Wendy's' eyes met as they paused to take a better look at one another. Dipper was instantly reminded of the time that the shapeshifter had taken the form of Wendy in the bunker. Once again, a doppelgänger of the woman was in their presence.
"Dude… You're Jamie LeCroix!" Wendy blurted out before realizing that she sounded no different than the people who had asked her all night for photos. "Wow… Y-You look just like this character I'm playing…" Jamie commented as she swept a stray lock of hair from her face. Aside from their attires, the two could be twins; a fact that wasn't lost on Dipper. "Funny that you should say that…" Wendy said as she opened her clutch and fished for her identification. Locating it in the seemingly bottomless purse, she presented it to the starlet. "No fucking way…" Jamie said with a chuckle as she did a double take. "Yup… I'm Wendy Corduroy. Well… I was until I married this hottie… Now I'm Wendy Pines…" the ginger woman explained as she clung to the arm of her husband. "I'd say that things ended up turning out alright for you then…" Jamie said as the trio sat down at a somewhat sticky table in the loud tavern. Jamie had many questions for the inspirational woman and luckily, Wendy was more than happy to oblige. Over the course of the next hour, the actress tried to think of everything she could to get a better grip on her character and deliver an award worthy performance. During the impromptu interview, Dipper kept wondering when his wife would ask just who was behind the movie. "So… Who's producing the movie that you're filming? I-I wasn't told that this was going on… Honestly, we just kinda stumbled upon it…" Wendy asked the actress. "No way! So, you had no idea that they are making a movie about your life? About what happened? That's messed up!" Jamie said as she took a sip of the water she had ordered. "I know, right?!" Wendy agreed. "I figured that you were here as some sort of consultant or something…" the faux redhead continued. "Nope… Just here to get away from the kids for the weekend…" the former officer said with a chuckle. "Well… I can get you on set and maybe we can both find out who is trying to make a buck off of your story…" Jamie offered. "That would be great!" Wendy exclaimed as a smile formed on her freckled face.
"So… I've got a question…" Dipper said as he looked towards the actress. "What would that be?" the younger woman asked as she met his hazel gaze. "What is an actress of your caliber and social standing doing in a dive bar like this?" the chestnut haired man inquired. It was a question that he had been meaning to ask for some time, as she seemed to stick out like a sore thumb amongst the more average looking patrons. "Well… I was gonna turn in early because we're filming the scene at the bank tomorrow and I wanted to mentally prepare myself for it… But then I got an alert on my phone saying that I was spending about forty-five hundred dollars at this bar, so I wanted to see who was running up my tab…" the starlet said before continuing her explanation. "I still don't know who it is, but the only reason they could even open a tab here is because the actor who's playing you kinda digs these places… Says that going to them helps keep him grounded and connected to the real, instead of the fakeness of the entertainment industry. To each, their own I suppose… Anyways, I came here one time and now there's someone running up an impressive bill on my dime…" Jamie said with a bit of a scoff. "Yeah… About that…" Wendy began as the blue eyes of the actress focused their attention on what she was going to say next.
Author's Note: So, this chapter took a little bit longer than I wanted it to take to write, but I was in short supply of free time lately. That and honestly I was suffering from a bit of writer's block. I have tons of B-Stories to fill my chapters out, but I'm still trying to figure out the middle of my main story. Like, I know where I want it to go and all, but I just have to figure out how to get there. Case in point, the whole story of Wendy and Dipper finding out that they're making a slightly more dramatized movie (I'm leaning towards it being a Lifetime style movie or something, but it may be a big Hollywood one… Not entirely sure) was just supposed to be a short B-Plot and it totally ended up consuming this chapter. Anyways… Why were the gnomes after the Spellbook? Who is behind the movie? What will Jamie do when she finds out that Wendy was the one behind the massive bar tab? Answers to all that and more in the next installment of Tales Of The Flame & The Ax… -iKLOT
My Playlist For This Chapter:
The Decemberists – "Severed"
Jonathan Davis – "What It Is"
Starset – "Halo"
Chevelle – "Joyride (Omen)"
Theory Of A Deadman – "Straight Jacket"
Sick Puppies – "Rip Tide"
Nothing But Thieves – "Sorry"
CHVRCHES – "Get Out"
St. Vincent – "Los Ageless"
The Official Shooting Star Falls AU Reading Order:
Underage Discoveries On A Reckless Night: A Shooting Star Falls Prequel
A Shooting Star Falls
Echoes Of A Nearby Future: A Shooting Star Falls Story
Scarred Summer: A Shooting Star Falls Story
The Dark Days of Candy Chiu: A Shooting Star Falls Story
Forever Memories: A Shooting Star Falls Story
Stable Times Or A Wild Ride?: A Shooting Star Falls Story
Grenda's Confession: A Shooting Star Falls Story
Birthday Weirdness In The Rose City: A Shooting Star Falls Story
The Gift Of Forever: A Shooting Star Falls Story
Wendy & Dipper Vs The Future: A Shooting Star Falls Story
Life In Transit: A Shooting Star Falls Story
Pause The Moment: A Shooting Star Falls Story
Tales Of The Flame & The Axe: A Shooting Star Falls Story