"Good morning, everyone! It is now 7 AM and nighttime is officially over! Time to rise and shine! Get ready to greet another beee-yutiful day!"

Excellent. The announcements are here.

Knock knock knock.

…

…

…

I step forward slightly and smile when the door opens. "Good morning, Ka-"

I flinch back as Kaguya screams and nearly slams the door in my face.

But, as soon as it's closed, it's open again.

"I-I'm sorry!" Kaguya says, hiding behind her door and peeking her head out at me. "I just - y-you startled me, and, with everything-"

"It's okay, Kaguya." I say reassuringly. "I just came over to let you know I don't hold your vote against you." I say, trying to look and sound as genuine as possible. "We're all in an unfortunate situation and unfortunate decisions are going to have to be made. So there's no need to freak out about it like yesterday, okay? You and I are good."

Kaguya frowns thoughtfully. "I…" she trails off, looking as if she were trying to find the right words.

I wait patiently.

"...R-Respectfully, I disagree." Kaguya says, still frowning.

Oh? Now this is a surprise.

I match her frown. "You don't want to be on good terms with me?" I ask, a bit confused. This doesn't seem like something the Ultimate Weather Broadcaster would say.

Kaguya's eyes widen. "N-No! It's not that," she says and her frown deepens. "I just…I did - we all did a bad thing by voting to kill one of us. Wouldn't you say that's a crime?" Kaguya asks.

"Well…no." I disagree. "We had no choice, if you didn't vote it would be a vote against yourself." I say.

"But if we all took a second to think about it and discuss it, we could've all abstained. Then there would've been one vote against everyone - an eighteen way tie." Kaguya says. "In that case, nobody would've been complicit in the would-be death of a classmate."

Ah…I think I see what she's trying to say.

"But it's like you said, Kaguya, we all committed a crime by voting for someone else," I say, leaving out the fact that I ended up voting for myself by default. "Since that's the case, we're all in the same boat. Why can't we start off on a clean slate?" I ask.

Kaguya goes silent again and I can practically hear the cogwheels turning in her head.

This is the first conversation I've gotten to have with the usually anxious Weather Broadcaster but I think I'm getting to know the real Kaguya - not the one she presents to the world.

The real Kaguya has a bit of a naive sort of view of the world. Going by this conversation, her concept of justice and morality is very black and white. Kaguya believes all crimes and criminals are bad and that's why she's reluctant to accept my offer of friendship - Kaguya believes she committed a crime, so in turn, she doesn't believe she deserves it.

At least her view comes with a silver lining for us, her fellow captives. If all crimes and criminals are bad, then all heroes and authorities are good. Kaguya won't actively be trying to sabotage any future trials or investigations.

Kaguya finally speaks again: "...I'll think about it." she says and shuts the door again.

…Well. That didn't go how I'd hoped it would.

I sigh and start to make my way to the cafeteria. I pass by a jogging Jotaro doing laps around the dormitory.

Even though I didn't get to start off the day by making sure Kaguya and I were okay, I still think today should be a better one than yesterday.

After all-

We have our…water…back…

…

…

…

As I walk into the kitchen part of the cafeteria, I think that it might not actually be a better day…

"...What…What exactly happened here?" I ask.

…for Sachiko, Sumire, and Shion, at least.

The three girls in question slowly turn around to face me, all three of them soaking wet from the waist up.

"...Shion was helping me do the dishes." Sumire starts.

"Because she shouldn't be doing them in the first place." Shion continues.

"And I came to get a drink of water and the sink exploded." Sachiko finishes.

…

…

…

"Pfffftt."

"Don't you dare laugh, Tatsumi Endo." Sachiko scowls.

"Don't you dare laugh, Tatsumi Endo." the twins repeat in a mocking voice.

Sachiko grits her teeth and slaps the twins upside their heads and storms out of the cafeteria. "I will speak to you later, Tatsumi." she says and walks off to presumably get a change of clothes.

I turn back to the sisters to find them arguing over who gets to do the dishes and honestly, I'm having a lot of trouble figuring out if they hate each other or not.

"Sit down and relax, sister."

"I'm perfectly capable of washing some plates and utensils, sister."

"Shut up and let me take care of it, dear sister. Wouldn't want an accident to happen, now, would we?"

"Shut-"

Their voices lower suddenly, Sumire cutting herself off with what sounds like a pained noise and both sisters looking down at Sumire's hand. There's a mixture of annoyance and concern on Shion's face and a mixture of annoyance and exhaustion on Sumire's.

Shion whispers something harshly to Sumire and the latter nods reluctantly, flexing the fingers on her right hand with an unreadable expression on her face.

I get a feeling the two of them have forgotten that I'm standing right here so I quickly grab a box of cereal and quietly step out of the kitchen.

I don't think I was supposed to see…whatever that was, but I'll get to the bottom of that mystery too.

The completely different on-screen personality from Kaguya, the mystery of why the Kotobuki twins stopped skating together (which probably has to do with whatever I just saw), and most importantly, the mystery of who brought all of us here.

After all, what is an Ultimate Paparazzi if not an expert at gathering information that was intended to be private (sometimes. I'm not a total creep, okay? I take public information and make it more known too!)?

As was silently agreed yesterday, not everyone has gathered in the cafeteria. It'll probably be another day or two before we can civilly eat as a group again.

Takagi, Kite, and Yuuji are sitting at one table and Min and Aria sit at another.

Interesting combinations.

Hmm…

"Ah, my Ultimate Investigator, come hither!" Takagi calls. "The whisper of eternal night summons you back to my side. Splendid! What a blessed reunion, a boon from beyond the eventide! Come, partake of this joy with me-!"

"Takagi means to say good morning-" Kite starts as I walk over to sit down with the trio.

Takagi puts a hand over Kite's mouth. "Forgive my Ultimate Advisor, Sir Takagi," he says. "I shall get to the point and not squander any more of your time. I mean to pose you a query, Ultimate Investigator," Takagi says with a calculating expression. "What say you about the mirage that hath taken over mine Kingdom? Dost thou have any inklings as to who may be behind it?"

…What?

"Do you have any suspicions about the identity of the Mastermind?" Yuuji rephrases in a vocabulary everyone can understand.

I gasp, "You speak Takagi-language too?" I ask the filmmaker.

Yuuji laughs lightly, seeming much more at ease than he was when we first met. "I mean, I am an Ultimate Filmmaker. I'm fluent in a lot of made up language and vocabulary." he says. "You'll get used to it eventually."

Oh, of course he is. Come on, Tatsumi. Step up your game.

Takagi huffs and leans back in his chair. "That is what I said, is it not?" he pouts and turns back to me. "Come, my Investigator, relay your knowledge unto us." Takagi orders.

Hmm…do I have any suspicions about the identity of the Mastermind?

I mean, everyone was there in the gymnasium when Monokuma appeared so it can't be the same case like it was with Mukuro Ikusaba hiding amongst her classmates disguised as her sister.

…

Wait. What did I just say?

When my eyes drift towards the kitchen, Takagi clicks his tongue and shakes his head at me. "Worry not, Sir Takagi, the Ultimate Spymaster and the Ultimate Lady-in-Waiting are not women you should fear." Takagi says confidently. "The Kotobuki sisters are two of the most trusted members of my retinue."

("I guess I get Sumire's, but why Spymaster?" Yuuji whispers to Kite.

"Probably because figure skaters are nimble and stuff like spies…I dunno." Kite whispers back.)

"R-Right…" I nod.

That may be what Takagi believes, but I need to investigate more and form my own opinions. And, it's not the wisest idea to disagree with Takagi so I'll just go along with him for now. The twins haven't exactly done anything wrong (other than make the rest of us [re: me] very uncomfortable) so I don't need to treat them as hostile…yet.

…I don't like twins. They give me the heeby-jeebies.

"So, I'm guessing you trust Kite and Yuuji as well?" I ask, gesturing to the other two boys.

The boys in question smile expectantly at Takagi.

Once again, Takagi clicks his tongue and shakes his head. "Not quite." he says. "Hark, Sir Takagi, Ultimate Investigator!" Takagi says and points a finger very close to my face. "Sir Kite, Sir Kikuo, Lady Sumire, and Lady Shion and I were all already bonded together before arriving here," he says. "As such, I have the utmost faith that these four subjects are innocent of the wrongdoings that have brought us here."

I look at Yuuji.

Yuuji sighs, "Takagi, Kite, Kikuo, Sumire, and Shion were already friends before arriving here so he doesn't think they're behind our kidnapping." he translates. "He vouches for them, he doesn't vouch for me - which, I guess, is fair." Yuuji says. "Takagi doesn't know me yet."

Kite crosses his arms. "What, so Yuu can translate what you say for Tatsumi but I, as your Ultimate Advisor, can't?"

Takagi puts his entire hand over Kite's face. "Cease your grievances, Sir Kite, and hasten to the kitchen. My same faced minions have been gone for quite some time, I am beginning to worry." he says, giving Kite a knowing look. "Now shoo."

Kite nods and walks off to the kitchen without another word.

"Now, Sir Tatsumi, you have your assignment. I wish you godspeed in thy pursuit of the truth - now go. I have much to discuss with Sir Yuuji." Takagi says and turns to the blonde in question. "What ho, Sir Yuuji, back to our previous dialogue. Divulge thy epithets and thy vocation."

Yeah, no.

I quickly get out of there and bring me and my cereal to Min and Aria's table.

"Hey guys, can I join you?"

"No." Min deadpans.

"Go ahead." Aria smiles.

I stick my tongue out at Min and sit down. "So, what's going on here?" I ask. "You two seemed to be in a rather heated discussion earlier."

Aria rolls her eyes, "Min is trying to get me to ask the other side if Ryoji is more famous than her or not." she says dryly.

Min grits her teeth. "I know for a fact that I'm more famous than him but he somehow has more subscribers on MeTube than I do on Flitter!" she cries. "I just want to know how that's possible!" Min demands.

Well for one, Ryoji's personality wasn't plucked straight from a high school movie with a bitchy mean girl as the antagonist.

But…actually, now that I think about it, wasn't Ryoji-?

"Tatsumi! You know a lot of…stuff," Min says suddenly, startling me out of my thoughts. "Use that freaky memory of yours to tell me the truth." she says as more of a demand than a request.

Ugh. I can never muse in peace around these people.

I'm not going to tell her any dirt I may or may not have on Ryoji, but I'll amuse her: "What exactly do you have in mind, Min?" I ask. "I know a lot of things but you're going to have to be more specific."

Min frowns thoughtfully and Aria smiles slightly, a knowing look on her face.

"Well…" Min says. "Um, I don't know," she says. "Isn't there, like, any dirt on the guy?" Min asks.

Well, um, I don't know Min, why don't you, like, ask him?

Fortunately, I don't have to answer because the man himself comes to my rescue.

"Hey, Tatsumi! You feeling good this morning?" Ryoji asks cheerfully. "The water got turned on overnight, isn't that nice?"

I smile, both at Ryoji's appearance and the annoyed look on Min's face. "I'm feeling great, Ryoji, thanks." I nod. "You came at a great time, actually," I say and turn my gaze back to a red faced Min. "Min has some questions about your MeTube."

Ryoji looks pleasantly surprised. "Really? You?" he wonders. "What d'you wanna know?" Ryoji asks.

Min grumbles, fidgeting with the sleeves of her white fur jacket. "It's…noth-"

"Min was wondering how you amassed so many subscribers, Ryoji." Aria says with a smile. "Won't you please tell her? She's oh so curious." she drawls.

Ryoji beams. "Really?" he asks and his face falls slightly. "Well, I don't actually use my MeTube or Flitter all that much any more, but people just liked my speedrunning videos. And I was nice to every – I was nice to my fans and engaged with them a lot." Ryoji explains and his face brightens again. "It wasn't that hard, actually."

While Min, now sucked into the storytelling, drills Ryoji with passive aggressive questions and a bemused Aria watches, I make a mental note of Ryoji's correction.

He wasn't nice to everyone.

Interesting.

So Ryoji really did–

Min slams her hands down on the table. "Didn't you say something to the red twin-"

"Her name is Sumire." Aria chimes in.

"-about collabing on her MeTube or something!?" she demands. "She mentioned it when we and her stupid sister were talking-"

"Mmm, 'stupid sister'?" Aria hums. "Didn't you just get done rating everyone on physical attractiveness and put Shion near the top? You know, before you started rambling about Ryoji's fame." she says.

"I-" Min freezes. "Shut UP, Aria!" she screeches, her face turning even redder. "I have eyes you know, I'm allowed to acknowledge physical beauty while also acknowledging that Shion is the bitchiest person here!"

"Ha! Takes one to know one, Tae!" Shion's voice shouts from across the cafeteria.

A now seemingly okay Sumire and Kite stand behind her, unimpressed looks on their faces.

Min grits her teeth. "Mind your damn business, Kotobuki." she snaps.

Shion scoffs, rolling her eyes. "You screaming loud enough for the entire cafeteria to hear makes it everyone's business, dumbass!"

Well, I guess the nice girl facade is off already.

As Shion and Min's arguing gets more and more intense, Ryoji and I exchange a look and silently agree to escape their line of fire and flee the cafeteria.

As soon as Ryoji and I escape the cafeteria, we walk right into another scene.

Mikasa, Rui, and Hakuma.

An excited Rui circles a silent Hakuma - who appears to be in his vigilante persona - with a sketch pad and pen in hand, frantically sketching out the Ultimate Vigilante in his armor. Mikasa circles Hakuma in the opposite direction, muttering to herself as she looks him up and down.

"Um," I look at Ryoji. "Were they here when you came in?" I ask.

Ryoji nods and sighs. "I think they're in their creative headspace or whatever," he says. "I tried talking to them but neither of them responded." Ryoji says. "I did take a look at what Rui was drawing though - it's Hakuma in actual armor instead of this military gear stuff." he explains. "And Mikasa is muttering about how he moves with all that stuff on and how she can translate it into data and…stuff."

I raise an eyebrow. "They want to make him a video game character?"

Ryoji shrugs. "I guess."

"I s-"

I stop mid-sentence when Ryoji's stomach makes the loudest noise I've ever heard a stomach make; it even pulls the girls out of their heads.

Hakuma, Rui, Mikasa, and I turn to stare at Ryoji.

Ryoji blushes furiously. "I forgot to grab breakfast. Min distracted me." he says and looks at me. "I'll see you later." Ryoji says quickly and runs into the cafeteria to prevent any further embarrassment.

I turn to look at the trio.

They look back at me.

And then they immediately go back to circling Hakuma and muttering to themselves.

I sigh and shake my head. "Poor Hakuma." I say and make no move to help him, walking towards the dormitories to see if Sachiko is all cleaned up.

As I get closer to Sachiko's dorm, I can hear her shower running.

Well.

What do I do now?

I'm about to go into my dorm to wait when I hear a jovial tune from behind me.

I turn around and smile at the sight of Kikuo. "Good morning, Kikuo." I nod. "Sleep well?"

Kikuo nods and you know, I didn't notice before but either Kikuo can play the flute with that mask of his still on or he can just pull it up and down really quickly.

The two of us stand in a rather awkward silence for a moment.

"...So," I say. "You're not mute, right? You have selective mutism." I ask bluntly. At the surprised look on Kikuo's face I quickly add, "I-It's not rude to say that, right? I didn't mean it rudely."

Kikuo shakes his head and pulls his mask down to his chin (so he does pull it down!) and brings his flute to his lips. Ooo, the skin usually under the mask is a tiny bit lighter than the uncovered skin. It's not too noticeable, but myself, being the Ultimate Paparazzi, notice everything.

He plays a different but still positive sounding tune and quickly pulls his mask back up.

"I'm assuming that's a yes to the selective mutism?"

Kikuo nods.

Hm, so my theory was right.

I smile kindly at him, "I'll save you the trouble and ask questions you can just nod or shake your head to, is that okay?"

Kikuo nods, the corners of his eyes crinkling, and I can tell he's smiling.

"Are you holding up okay?" I ask.

Kikuo nods.

"You and your friends, the Milk Tea Crowd, are you better at communicating with them?"

Kikuo nods again and smiles behind his mask.

"That's nice, that's nice." I nod.

What else can I ask him that doesn't require him to talk?

Hm…

"Do you have any suspicions about who brought us here?" I ask.

Kikuo starts to shake his head, and then he pauses.

I wait.

Kikuo looks around the dormitory and points at a door.

I raise an eyebrow. "You think…Yuuji is responsible?" I ask.

I mean, sure the guy was a little rude when we first met, but that's to be expected with our current situation.

Kikuo shakes his head and I wait patiently for him to come up with a response. He clenches his fist. "I…"

My eyes widen and I hold myself back from commenting on his speaking.

"Bad…bad vibes." Kikuo says in a small voice.

Oh.

I rephrase my last question, "You don't think he's responsible, you just don't like him." I state.

Kikuo nods.

Interesting.

"Then you and I will keep an eye on him, okay?" I say reassuringly. "After all, I'm Takagi's 'Ultimate Investigator'." I say with a wry smile.

"And I'm the Ultimate Plague Doctor." comes Sachiko's voice from behind us. "You were waiting for me, Tatsumi?" she asks as I turn around. A freshly showered Sachiko nods politely when she sees Kikuo. "Good morning, Kikuo."

Kikuo nods back and reaches up to pull his mask down and-

"Good morning, everyone! Please gather in the Gymnasium in fifteen minutes!"

Sachiko flexes her fingers, looking unusually anxious and angry.

I frown, putting a hand on her shoulder. "Sachi?"

Sachi jumps when I touch her and looks at me with wide eyes before putting on a small smile. "I'm fine." she says and looks between me and Kikuo. "Let's go."

As soon as the last person enters the gym, Monokuma springs up from behind his signature podium. "Well, well, well! Let's get right to it, shall we? I'm interested to see how this one turns out…" he says, trailing off mysteriously.

Katashi, the one guy I haven't seen all morning, speaks up first, rolling his eyes. "The motive, right? Spit it out already." he snaps.

Mitsuki, the one girl I haven't seen all morning, speaks next. "You know, I'm a little nervous." she says with a frown. "Doesn't he usually do a whole spiel before dropping the motive bomb?" Mitsuki wonders.

Aria frowns. "I have a bad feeling about this."

Jotaro taps his chin, "A bad feeling or a bad feeling?" he asks.

"Shut-" Hakuma starts but Monokuma finishes his sentence for him.

"Everyone shut up and look at your PDAs!" Monokuma says angrily. "I just sent all of you a name…" he says. "The name you received is your target. If you manage to kill your target, you get to leave without a trial! Simple as that!" Monokuma says gleefully.

Everyone goes silent for a minute, no one moving to check their student handbooks.

…

…

…

"CHECK YOUR HANDBOOKS!" Monokuma demands.

Everyone checks their handbooks, including me.

…

…

…

…

…

I see.

Well, congrats to my target, I'm basically a get out of jail free card in this situation. I would never, ever even consider killing an Ultimate.

As for the others?

The annoyed look on Shion's face, the dark look on Ryoji's face, the unreadable look on Hakuma's helmet clad face…someone is definitely considering it.

A/N heyyyy

all the potential killers

they are beautiful