How You Doing Insane Gang!

Does anyone know any HTTYD fics that involve real Viking history and traditions? I'm thinking of making another mini-series where the gang meets Saxons. What do you guys think?

Takes place in between RTTE season 5 and 6. This also has swearing and adult themes yins have been warned.

Disclaimer: The franchise would never die if I was in charge.

Stoick cracked his neck from side to side as he made his way to the Great Hall for his lunch break. Most of the villagers were already inside enjoying today's meal of Salmon and potatoes.

He got his plate from the banquet table observed the slew of Vikings from his raised seat. He could spot his son's friends back at their claimed table. The only two that were missing was Hiccup and Astrid themselves.

Probably off exploring again and lost track of time. Stoick thought to himself.

He walked down to the teens to ask about his son's whereabouts when he overheard Snotlout.

The boy was tearing into an extra mutton leg. "So two days ago I went to go find Hiccup because he put me on fishing duty again—"

"Snotlout is this a real story or you just complaining again?" Fishlegs asked as he picked up a slice of potato.

Snotlout held out his hands. "Yes, it's a real story! Now let me tell it before Hiccup and Astrid decide to make an appearance."

Stoick lifted an eyebrow. What story did Snotlout have that he wouldn't want Hiccup and Astrid to overhear?

"Anyways I open up the side door and was about to yell for Hiccup's scrawny butt when I hear them fucking right above me!"

The twins burst out laughing and Tuffnut wiped an imaginary tear from his eye. "Oh wow that's embarrassing, you have the worst luck."

"Yeah, what is that like the fourth time you saw them?" Ruffnut interrupted.

Fishlegs pushed his plate away. "Did you really have to tell us that story while we're trying to eat?"

Snotlout crossed his arms. "What? It's not like you haven't seen them going at it either, you're just lucky that you saw it once."

"And it scarred me for weeks."

"How many times have we caught them, Sis?"

Ruffnut counted her fingers and held up three fingers. "Twice, and don't forget that one time Dagur saw them and he wouldn't stop crowing about it."

"They should give us a heads up for something," Snotlout pouted, "I didn't think cuz would be that good..."

"Okay, can we stop talking about it?" Fishlegs asked.

Meanwhile, Stoick thought he was going pass out. His little boy is already having sex? Stoick didn't even give him the talk yet so how would he know what to do? The color drained from his face. Was he being safe?

There was one other person listening to the teens' conversation namely one Osvif Hofferson.

"What is Haddock doing with my little sister?"

Fishlegs started to panic at his tone of voice. "Nothing Osvif, they are better than ever and not doing anything inappropriate together."

Snotlout waved him off nonchalantly. "It's crazy, right? I mean what does Hiccup have that I don't? I bet I can fuck a girl better."

Osvif's eyes widened. "That's what they're doing?" He banged his fist against the table and hastily made his way towards the doors.

"Wait! Osvif! Where are you going?" Fishlegs cried out.

"Oh, Thor! Hiccup's going to get his ass kicked!" Tuffnut exclaimed.

Ruffnut smacked Snotlout on the helmet. "And Astrid will kill you for telling him."

"Guys! We have to warn Hiccup before Osvif gets to him!" Fishlegs warned.

The four went quiet and locked eyes with one another before all simultaneously got up at once to push and shove their way out the door.

"They might not be far as they're probably on their way to the Great Hall to eat." Fishlegs calculated.

"Let's head to the village square then." Snotlout pointed out.

Tuffnut elbowed the rest of them. "Look! There they are!"

Ruffnut pointed in the other direction. "And here comes Osvif!"

The gang rushed to get to Hiccup before Osvif. Hiccup was walking hand and hand with Astrid towards the Great Hall. They were a little caught up on an island if you know what I mean. He turned his head to see his name being called and halted.

"Hey gang, what's up?" He unlaced his hand from Astrid's so he could wave at them.

Each one started yelling and making hand motions. Snotlout dragged his index finger across his neck frantically while Ruffnut had Tuffnut's neck in between her hands and was roughly pushing him back and forth. Fishlegs was the only one who pointed to someone heading towards them.

Hiccup furrowed his eyebrows and gave them all a confused face. Osvif? He looked a little pissed off and he was grumbling under his breath. Maybe he should ask him what's wrong.

"Osvif! What's wrong?" Hiccup asked him as he approached.

Osvif cocked his fist back to slug Hiccup in the lip. The force sent him reeling back as he tried to find his footing again. His left hand immediately went to his face and his right skimmed the ground beneath him to keep him upright.

The gang cringed at the hit and Astrid shoved Osvif away.

"Osvif! What the hell!"

He ignored Astrid to face Hiccup again. "It's because your the chief's son isn't? Makes you think you're entitled to her when you two aren't even together?!"

Hiccup wiped the blood way from his cut lip. "What are you talking about?"

"The first chance you get to be away from Berk along with Astrid and you take it to don't you? Just so you can fuck her and have your way with her."

Astrid pushes him away again. "I can't believe you! Is this some twisted way to do defend my honor?"

Hiccup grew agitated and spit blood on the ground. "Oh yeah? And who told you that because you're the fourth brainless guy this week to punch me so make it good."

Osvif swung again this time connecting with Hiccup's eye and cheek. It sent him to the ground and caused the gang to step into action. The boys pushed off Osvif who was leering over Hiccup and the girls helped sit up Hiccup on the ground.

"Go home Osvif! I'll deal with you later!" Astrid scowled.

Osvif huffed before turning around and go back to their house.

"Yikes, he got you good cuz." Snotlout winced.

Astrid lightly grazed his already purplish eye. Hiccup hissed in pain. "So I don't suppose you guys know what that was about."

Tuffnut shrugged, "We tried gesturing. Don't you know sign language?"

"That was sign language?"

Ruffnut placed a hand on Hiccup's shoulder. "We don't know sign language."

"We're sorry we didn't warn you in time Hiccup." Fishlegs apologized.

"How did my brother find out about us anyway?" Astrid asked.

Fishlegs twiddled his thumbs in nervousness. "Well...he might have overheard Snotlout whining about catching you guys in the act two days ago."

Astrid punched Snotlout in the side. "You saw us?"

Snotlout looked flustered. "Yeah! I was going to complain to Hiccup about putting me on fishing duty again but instead, I saw you two again."

She sighed and pinched her nose, "Can you guys take Hiccup back to his house and get some ice on his face? I have to go talk some sense into my yak brain of a brother."

Tuffnut held out a hand to help Hiccup off the ground.

"Yeah, we're on it." Snotlout mumbled.

Astrid made it back to her family house to see Osvif sharpening his sword. Thank the gods their parents or Kar was here to witness the argument.

"Thanks to you me and Hiccup now have to do damage control."

Osvif didn't look up from his work. "Serves him right for taking advantage of you."

"Oh, my Thor I didn't think you were this stupid."

Osvif jabbed his sword into the floorboards. "What do you want me to think Astrid? The second you guys live on a different island and he's all over you and without asking me for permission or dad!"

She couldn't help her leg going out and kicking his. "I'm old enough! I don't need permission to do anything let alone who I want to date!"

Osvif scrunched up his nose. "You two are dating?"

Astrid threw up her arms. "Yes!"

He rubbed his bicep and had the decency to look sheepish. "Oh...that makes sense..."

"We didn't want to make a big deal about it so only the gang knew and my sex life isn't anyone's concern."

"Wow, I feel like an ass."

"That's because you were and you need to apologize to Hiccup."

Osvif winced. "How's his face?"

"A split lip and probably a black eye but he's had worse." She sighed.

He stood up to take his leave. "Come on, I need to apologize."

The two walked into the Haddock house where Hiccup was perched on the table holding a block of ice to his face. The gang was circled around him.

"Oh great, he's back to finish me off."

Osvif held up his hands. "No, no I came here to apologize."

Hiccup quirked an eyebrow but remained silent he took that as his cue to continue.

"I jumped to conclusions and I thought you were only using my sister but she explained to me that wasn't the case and that you two are dating. Which I'm happy about by the way."

"Apology accepted and I'm sorry for not being man enough to tell your family or mine yet."

"Stoick doesn't know about you two?"

Of course, to make matters worse Stoick opened the door to call for Hiccup, though he looked uncomfortable doing so.

"Hiccup, son...I may have overheard Snotlout say somethings and we need to talk."

Don't worry the second and last part will be out tomorrow.

Stay Crazy.