This was originally posted just on Ao3. I've decided to crosspost it here as well.
sham, pain, problems
Chapter 1 - sometimes you just don't know the answer
Four little words, and all they required was a simple answer. There was no room for disappointment or misunderstanding. And yet…
Kai had it all planned out. It took three months of planning, but after three years together, it didn't matter. It would all be worth it.
Of course, it would be at their spot. A little cliff side picnic table where they used to study when the weather was nice.
The old hot dog stand nearby was still open, he'd checked. And the table was private enough that he didn't think the bored high school student would be impeding on the private moment.
It was the middle of the summer. People were less likely to be hanging around than if it was the start or the end of the season.
It was dumb, but it was perfect.
What could go wrong?
No worse words could be asked.
"Will you marry me?"
"I… No."
His smile wavered and then fell at the look on Cole's face.
Cole's eyes darted around, looking everywhere except at Kai. To the ring, his shoes, the people on the beach below. His chest was starting to rise and fall a little too fast.
"No," Cole said again. "I… I can't. I'm sorry."
And then Cole was gone, and Kai was left kneeling on the ground, wondering what he'd done wrong.
Calls and texts weren't going through to Cole's phone. Whether it was because it was off or Cole had blocked Kai's number, well…
Kai sighed and looked around their apartment. It was big, and the mismatched dark couch and chairs clashed horribly with the stark white kitchen table. Knick knacks from both their lives were mixed together on tables and shelves. Trophies, cool rocks and shells, photos, little gifts, a bowl of plastic fruit neither of them remembered buying.
The TV hung cold against the wall, reflecting his face in the morning light. He turned away, not wanting to see the bags under his eyes or the worry lines creasing his brow.
Where the hell was Cole?
Sure, he was pissed that his boyfriend rejected his proposal, but Kai had thought they both were on the same page. He probably just needed some time to himself. Still. Cole should tell him that. He didn't need to ghost him.
What if…
By the First Master, what if Cole was in the hospital? Some unnamed person, lying unconscious or with no memory?
Shit.
He needed to go check or call or… or…
His phone buzzed in his pocket.
Faster than one could blink, he'd accepted the call.
"Cole?" he said, not reading the name or seeing the photo on the screen.
"No?" said the person on the other line. "It's your sister? Nya? You do remember me, don't you?"
Kai's shoulders sagged as he leaned against the wall, dragging in a heavy breath.
He could hear people laughing in the background on her end. Jay, mostly, and a few others. Friends. Family.
"Hey."
"What's wrong?"
Of course Nya would know. It'd been the two of them for so long, that she would know something was up by his tone or the inflections in his voice.
She called out for people on the other end to shut up. There was a cry and a murmur, but they quieted down nonetheless.
"Kai?"
"Cole rejected me."
There was silence.
"Kai…"
"Please don't."
"Do you want to cancel the trip? We'd totally get it."
Kai took one look around the apartment — his and Cole's apartment. A heaviness squeezing at his throat. His voice came out raw and cracked.
"No," he said. "No. I'm still going to come up."
The steady clacking of the train rolling over the tracks and the dark blur of the world passing by outside the windows smeared into a nothingness. Even the music playing from his earbuds could do nothing. Social media was worse. Everyone was getting proposed to.
Kai pulled the hoodie closer as he adjusted himself in the hard foam and leather of the seat.
Just a week ago, he thought he would be on this same train, holding the hand of his fiancé. But Cole…
Cole still hadn't responded to him.
Lou had, and that was much better than nothing. At least Kai knew where his boyfriend was.
Were they even still together? Could Kai still even call Cole his boyfriend? What was going on?
Kai bit the inside of his cheek to mask a groan as he rubbed the heels of his palms against his stinging eyes.
Don't cry. Don't cry, don't cry, don't cry. Don't. Cry.
A tear slipped down his cheek and he tugged the collar of the hoodie up to hide his face.
When he emerged, it was at his stop. His eyes were red and his face was puffy and streaked by the tears.
The NinDi ride from the train station to his family's home was… a ride. That was the best thing to call it. A ride.
Nya was out front waiting for him, her partner, Jay, by her side. She leapt out of her seat next to Jay on the front steps and over to the car the moment she saw them slowing down.
He'd barely had a moment to breathe before her arms were around him, squeezing tightly.
"I'm sorry," she said into his shoulder. "I'm so, so, so sorry."
He didn't say anything, only squeezed her back.
No one asked about Cole or why he wasn't with Kai. Instead, they gave him these looks. They were sad, mouth always partially open to ask or say something, before hesitating and asking something else. But their eyes were always a little too curious for comfort.
Kai, for the most part, ignored it.
"Do you want some coffee?"
"Yeah, that'd be great."
"How is work?"
"Work's fine. It's been keeping me busy."
"I heard you got a promotion a couple of weeks ago, congratulations!"
"Thanks."
And it was wash, rinse, and repeat. Every single time.
Kai wasn't surprised in the least. What else could someone say or ask after a person's partner rejected their proposal. And there was only so much to talk about.
The week had passed with mostly little fanfare or real reminders of… everything.
Except for what he seen in the recycling and waste bins.
A bright colorful foil banner. An empty bottle of champagne. The remains of a cake left on a box that had been ordered from the local bakery.
Kai dumped the recycling in the bin, marched upstairs to his old room — Jay and his mom calling after him, closed his door, and lied down on his bed.
He spent the next hour scrolling through social media. There were still engagement photos and videos, but he swiped past those and focused on the baby and vacation photos people were posting.
And then, the text came through.
It was from Cole.
And all it said was, "I'm sorry."
The two simple words haunted him for the last day of the trip. They haunted him on the NinDi ride to the train station. They haunted him on the train ride back to Ninjago City. They haunted him on the bus to his and Cole's apartment. They haunted him up the stairs and through their door.
His door. His apartment.
All of Cole's things were gone.
The only proof Cole had lived there were the spots untouched by dust, and the empty drawers for clothes in their room.
He'd left things like appliances and furniture they'd bought together, but his personal items? No where to be found.
Cole was gone.
Inspired by: "Champagne Problems" by Taylor Swift