A/N: The events of this story take place after Star Wars: Fallen Hero: Chapter 34

Just Like You: Zay's Tale

I'm afraid.

Zay took a deep breath, and tried to focus, what she was planning, what she was about to do, it would not be easy.

Fear was to be expected, and given her history, something that she was more than a little familiar with.

Fear…was an old friend.

Her hands were cold and her heart was pounding, it was one thing to plan what she was about to do, but to actually go through with it.

That…was something else.

The small courier vessel rumbled all around her, its hull being pressed upon by the strange dimension called hyperspace. Within the ship, The Fairwind dwelled Zay and four other people. The ship's crew, the Celchu family.

Zay had been their guest for the last six days. Morse Celchu and his wife Dal had found the girl hiding in an alley near the space port where the Fairwind had docked.

She had told them a sad tale, the death of her mother, and that she was being pursued, people looking to collect a debt.

It had been enough Dal had agreed to let her come with them, to get her off Nar Shadda.

It was just what Zay had needed.

She had been looking for a way off world. The Smuggler's Moon was not a place that lent to survival, especially not for a fourteen-year-old on her own.

Zay winced her hand going to the pocket in coveralls to the item within.

The Celchus made their living transporting ships for clients, they moved from world to world, and ship to ship, delivering the vessels to either their home ports, or to docking bays where the pilots, and or cargo, awaited their arrival.

According to Morse, Captain Celchu, they had been doing it for almost eighteen years now, first on their own, and now with their sons in tow. Seventeen-year-old Johun, piloted, while sixteen-year-old Rand worked on the engines.

Zay swallowed hard.

They were kind people, good people, people that would take a stranger, a lost girl off of Nar Shadda without a thought of reward. They were…

You know that isn't true.

Zay paused in her musings. The voice she had heard was not her own, but from within her, she might have called it her conscience, but…

What it had to say to her was far from moral.

"You're wasting time, girl," the voice hissed, "You've made a plan, you have what you need. Now get started or forget the whole thing."

Zay nodded.

Yes.

She had made up her mind. Her master had given her a task. The Celchu family knew nothing of that mission, she had told them nothing.

She doubted that they would understand.

When a Sith Lord like Darth Avaryss gave you a chance to prove yourself, when she offered you a place at her side…only a fool would turn that down.

Zay took another deep breath and mustered her courage, she put on her cutest smile and hobbled into the ship's passenger compartment.

Morse and Dal were sitting at the small table in the center of the room, going over some business on their datapads. Rand Celchu was in bunk off to their left, with the ship in hyperspace, the young engineer had little to do. Johun was up on the bridge she figured; he had been at the helm more often than not in the last five days.

The older Celchus looked up as she entered, their faces warm and inviting.

"Hey there, kid," Morse said, "Looking forward to our next stop?"

Zay's eye twitched slightly, it took all her strength not to say anything.

"Of course," she lied, even offering up a slight laugh.

"This…Phaseera place…you…you are sure that I'll be welcome there?"

Dal Celchu smiled at her.

"It is one of the nicer worlds we have visited in the last few years. It is a young colony in need of strong backs and brave hearts."

The older woman nodded.

"With all the wars on, there aren't many young people left to build places like it. A smart young woman like yourself will be welcome.

Zay accepted her praise with a slight nod. In the week that she had been here, she had helped Dal Celchu several times. Cooking, cleaning, and aiding her rescuer with her work on the ship's main computer, a catching several mistakes before they could be downloaded, saving the Celchus time and effort.

Zay was familiar basic computer programming, and slicing, something she had needed to learn from her first owner, Ankar Duma.

A necessary skill when encountering out of date computer systems in abandoned vaults.

Zay's hands curled into fists.

Master Ankar had purchased her on the slave market when she had been only eight years old. He had been something of a treasure hunter. Seeking out forgotten places and the treasures within.

He always purchased children, easily controlled and small enough to slip into places they weren't supposed to be.

On his last mission, he had sent her and four other children into an old Sith vault. Only Zay had come out, and not unscathed.

Paul, Tyree, Jana, and Nebin had not been so lucky.

They had died in the dark, Zay had heard them die, and had to leave them behind, bleeding she had dragged herself to her master, back into the light.

Her left leg spasmed slightly at the memory. From her foot to her ankle, the flesh had been twisted and warped, the result of a small cut, a cut made by a blade dipped in Sith poison.

If not for Master Avaryss, she realized, I would have been dead in matter of days.

Of course, if it was not for Avaryss hiring her master in the first place, Zay would likely never have gone into that vault.

She tried not think about that, the past was the past.

She needed to focus on the now.

She had a plan.

She needed to stick to it.

"Phaseera is going to be better than Nar Shadda, kid," Morse Celchu promised her, "Not that that is hard to do."

Her rescuer's wife chuckled.

"This will be a new start for you," she promised, "A life of peace after so much fear."

"In two days, you will be starting a brand-new life."

Zay smiled at that.

Sooner than that, she thought to herself.

In her mind's eye she could see Darth Avaryss, the dark haired Sith was giving her a sly smile.

"Remember, child, Peace is a lie…"

"There is only passion," Zay mumbled.

Morse looked up at her.

"Did you say something, kid?"

Zay shook her head.

"No," she answered.

Her smile becoming wide, her eyes flashed with excitement.

"I want to thank you for everything you have done. Taking me with you, giving me a chance at something new."

"You owe us nothing, kid," Dal said.

"Nevertheless, I wish to do something nice. I…maybe…no…but…no, that won't work…"

Finally, Zay giggled.

"I know. I can COOK for you!"

Both of the Celchus looked at each other.

"That is not necessary, kid," Morse said.

"But I insist," Zay interrupted, "I used to cook for my family all the time back home. I was good. My ma…my mama said so."

"You really don't have to," Dal said.

Zay flashed the two her most innocent look.

"Please, let me do this. To thank you and the boys for everything you have done."

Morse looked at his wife, and then at Zay.

"You really don't have to…"

"PLEASE!"

The couple finally caved.

"Fine, kid, just don't make a mess," Morse said.

"I'll clean up. I promise."

"Do you need any help," Dal asked, "Anything?"

"Nope, I got this! Trust me! You'll love it!"

Zay hobbled away, her heavy boot clunking on the deck.

As she left, she heard Morse say something to his wife.

"Sweet, kid. I hope Phaseera works out for her."

Zay smiled not the sweet smile of a fourteen-year-old girl, but the grin of a firaxa shark.

Sweet kid?

Yeah…right!

IOI

She worked quickly, The Celchu had supplied the galley well for this journey. From Nar Shadda to Osmund Re, with a brief stop on Phaseera, a twelve-day trip.

Zay's lip curled as she worked.

They really shouldn't have mentioned Phaseera.

It made what she had to do that much easier.

After her first two days on the Fairwind, she was almost ready to abandon her mission. Darth Avaryss had charged her with finding the location of Survivor Base, the home of the Jedi Master Jas Dar Bynn and his rebels. They were currently being used by her master as pawns, but that was not enough.

Master Avaryss needed to know the location of the world they called home; she needed the exact coordinates.

Zay had been tasked with that mission, penance for daring to access her master's holocron without permission.

No, she thought as she sliced up some tomo root.

Master Avaryss had not punished me for looking at her holocron.

She punished me for being stupid enough to get caught.

She had told Xen Loor what she meant to do, her master's fellow Sith, and former apprentice, Xen had agreed with her, or…had the Sith only convinced her that it had been her idea.

Regardless, Zay had been caught, and given this mission to make up for her mistake. For Four days she had wandered the smuggler's Moon, trying to figure out how she was going to get off world, much less find the location of a secret Jedi base.

After the second night, she had almost given up hope, sleeping in a box as the dirty rain of Nar Shadda pattered on the pavement.

She was hungry, thirsty, and frightened. As she dwelled on what had happened. She cursed Master Avaryss for doing this to her. Cursed Xen for lying and tricking her. Cursed the Zakuul for starting a war with the Sith, and the galaxy for giving her such a life.

She had been a slave as long as she could remember. Sold away from her mother. Forced by Master Ankar to crawl into dark and dangerous places.

In that moment, Zay felt her despair and loneliness fall away. She no longer felt fear…

She felt…hate.

PURE WHITE HATE!

As a child, Zay's Mama had always told her that the Jedi would come. One day, the champions of the Force would come to their small world and break the chains and bring the masters low.

A lie, Zay knew now.

A cruel trick to keep them from freeing themselves.

The Jedi weren't heroes!

The galaxy was not a place of justice. The Republic was a lie!

They were all evil…cruel!

SHE HATED THEM ALL!

SHE…

In that moment, she felt it, it…it was like…

She gasped.

She felt cold, so cold that it almost felt like she was burning, but beneath the pain, there was something more.

Something...better.

Master Avaryss had called it the heart of darkness, the pure pulsing energy of the dark side.

It was everywhere, and in all living things.

Light shone down, but it cast shadows on all things.

It was in those shadows that the Darkside existed.

The power of her master.

The power of Avaryss!

As she sat in that box, amazed by what she had found, she heard it…a whispered voice that sounded so much like her master.

Peace is a lie, there is only passion.

Through passion, I gain strength.

Through strength, I gain power.

Through power, I gain victory.

Through victory, my chains are broken.

The Force…shall set me free!

Those words echoed through her head, and in the heart of darkness, she understood them.

The mission, what her master desired, it was not impossible.

Not if she was strong.

Not if she trusted in the Force.

Trusted…in her hate.

When the rain stopped, she hobbled to the space port, it took a few days, but the Celchu family had found her.

Now, she was here.

Rand and Dal had both stopped by as she worked in the kitchen, asking if she needed anything. She assured them she didn't. That they were all going to be happy with what she was fixing.

They had returned to their duties. Weak in the Force, none of the family guessed what was going on.

Zay looked down into the pot.

Her eyes narrowing.

If only they had known.

The first two days aboard the Fairwind had been nice. Morse and Dal had fed her and let her get cleaned up. Rand had showed her the ship's engine. He had been most eager to tell her about his work, to impress her with what he knew.

She got the feeling he liked her. He was cute, make no mistake…

…but he was no Temmin Tagge.

The young Jedi padawan had ensnared her gaze, and her imagination.

Yet, if he was lost to her, maybe Rand…

…maybe…

Johun had showed her the bridge. How to steer and work the comm systems. He even showed her how to program the hyperdrive and bring them in and out of lightspeed.

The two boys answered her questions eagerly, happy to impress the young girl.

That knowledge was now…very useful.

For those first two days, she had almost given up on her mission again. She...she had started to like the family, being with them. Though she missed the people at Survivor base, Dr. Tagge, her son Temmin. She knew that if she didn't return with the information her master sought, she would not be able to return at all.

Avaryss would punish her, she would have an accident, a fatal accident, she knew it.

Rather than risk it, she was willing to stay here, stay with these good people. She felt safe, secure. They didn't treat her like a slave. They listened when she spoke. It felt nice.

She thought they might actually take her in.

They might have wanted her to stay.

They might have let her join their family.

Those hopes died when Captain Celchu told her about Phaseera, how she could a build a new life for herself there.

Zay had said nothing, she had given no outward sign of how she felt, she had simply smiled shyly and left.

She had hobbled back to her bunk, lay down on the bed and screamed into the pillow.

She didn't know this Phaseera, but she knew labor colonies.

Could you build a new life there, sure, but it was a life of menial drudgery, building something up for future generations. Rewards you would never live to see.

Master Ankar had visited several labor worlds during her time with him. Asking after children that had been dropped off. He had never purchased any when she had been with him, but that was only because there had been none available.

Sometimes, she knew, labor worlds would pay ship captains for people, finder's fees they called them.

Just another form of slavery.

Hard worlds, hard worlds, but vulnerable, slavers and pirates often raided labor worlds. Her friends Paul and Jana had been taken from a labor world.

Did the Celchu family mean well? Probably, but it didn't change the fact.

They don't want me, Zay realized.

They want to get rid of me!

They didn't want to help, only the pay for taking me to Phaseera.

All their kindness has been a lie.

She had been tricked.

THEY LIED TO ME!

She sobbed into the pillow, she…she had thought…

And…that is when it came to her again.

The darkness reached out.

And again…Zay let it take her.

As she lay there, feeling betrayed and angry, the dark side whispered to her.

It gave her ideas, and slowly, the plan to how she would accomplish Avaryss' mission came to be.

Zay looked up into the darkness, her expression cold and hard.

Dal and Morse had lied to her, betrayed her!

They would pay.!

Again, the darkness whispered in her ear, offering advice, and advising patience.

She listened and accepted what she heard.

It would take some time, a day or two at the most, but…she knew what she had to do now.

Yes, she knew.

IOI

As she moved back and forth between the cooking station and the pantry, she paused.

Three days ago, she had come up with her plan, last night she had acquired the last piece.

Her hand dipped into her pocket.

It was time.

She turned back to the pot, the stew she was preparing had been a favorite of Master Ankar, and Lord Avaryss had had no complaints either.

She looked down into it, seeing her reflection the chrome of the stove.

She frowned.

One ingredient left to add.

The most important one.

She reached into her pocket and pulled out a small vial. She held it up to the light, her eyes narrowing.

Her fear rose up again.

I can't do this, she thought.

I can't!

Yet again, she felt the darkness whisper to her, whisper to her in Master Avaryss' voice.

Do you want to go back to your old life?

Do you want to live as a nobody on some labor colony?

Do you want to wait to be ripped away from everything again?

Do you want to be prey…or…do you want to be the predator?

Again, Zay felt it, the hate for the galaxy.

It rose up, fed by the dark side within her, and the experience of opening her master's holocron.

Do you want to be nothing?

Do you want to be afraid?

Zay swallowed hard.

That was the real question, the one desire she had above all.

She wanted a life better than Mama's.

She didn't want to be a slave, but above all, most importantly…

She took a shuddering breath.

Most of all…she didn't want to be afraid anymore.

You will not be the dark side whispered.

I promise.

Zay…didn't hesitate.

She emptied the vial into the stew, stirring it in quickly.

A cold smile came to her lips.

Delicious!

The vial had contained a small amount of hyperdrive lubricant, highly toxic if ingested.

She knew what it could do, Master Ankar had used a vial to deal with a creditor once. Her master had chosen not to pay the man back with credits. The Lubricant was odorless and tasteless, or so he had claimed.

It was used to dampen static electricity in a hyperdrive, in an organic body, it quickly shut down electrical impulses, especially to the brain. Master Ankar had watched with a smile as the man he had murdered got more and more sleepy as his body shut down, finally his head fell to the table, and didn't rise again.

Zay took a shuddering breath.

You don't have to do this, her conscience said.

Spill the stew, and…

Her eyes narrowed.

No.

Master Avaryss would not be afraid, not when she had a mission.

Zay took another deep breath and smiled.

She could do this.

Holding the pot carefully, she made her way out of the galley.

She walked slowly, appearing more tired that she was.

Dinner...was served.

As well as...revenge!

The family was waiting for her. Dal and husband applauded her hard work. Rand even rose from his chair to help her bring it to the table.

He was so kind, so trusting.

Zay giggled into hand.

So very stupid!

"It smells wonderful, kid," Captain Celchu said.

"Yes," Dal agreed, "This was very thoughtful.

"Thanks," she said with fake yawn.

She was feeling tired and had a slight headache. She would go lay down, but not before bringing a bowl to Johun on the bridge.

She would eat later, she promised.

Yes, she would rest, and in a half hour or so, it would be done.

She watched her saviors take the first bite, then a second and a third.

Zay, their murderer, smiled.

she couldn't believe it, but it was done.

She did it!

Part of her still wanted to warn the family, tell them to stop eating, but she resisted that urge.

There was no going back now, and there was one last Celchu to deal with.

She hobbled up to the bridge to give Johun his helping, his death.

She giggled again.

She…she had never done anything like this before.

She was scared, but…excited at the same time.

Is this how the dark side felt?

Is that how Master Avaryss felt all the time?

She wasn't sure, she would have to ask her master about it, after she gave her coordinates for Survivor base.

She would find it, she was sure.

She trusted in the dark side.

She thought nothing of her victims. It was like master Avaryss always said:

The weak deserve their fate.

They were far too trusting, this time, it would cost them.

Dearly.

Zay shivered.

She couldn't help but feel she had taken a step on a new path.

It was frightening, but that was okay.

Fear was an old friend.

She knew fear, and now…she knew hate.

She would never be afraid again; it was time for everyone else to be afraid.

It would be a welcome change.

She thought about Avaryss, about all the power that a Sith had to offer.

I'm ready master.

Teach me.

A/N: Zay's adventure isn't offer, it has two more parts, and then she will be returning in Fallen Hero, a far different girl than when she left. Hope you liked this little look into her mission, until next time dear readers.