Episode 44: Space Wedding
(Play You'll Never Find Another Love Like Mine by Lou Rawls for this first section.)
Rawls exits his office and waved hello to Charlene.
Colonel Rawls: Hello, Charlene.
Charlene: Hey Baby. Ready for the wedding tomorrow?
Colonel Rawls: You know it. I asked Sureshot to be my best man and he said yes.
Charlene: That's good. Now all we need is a flower girl.
Colonel Rawls: Sally Brown already volunteered to be one.
Charlene: Perfect. And you have the cadets setting up our wedding, right?
Colonel Rawls: Yup.
In the wedding room, they are currently getting ready to set up for Rawls and Charlene's wedding.
Toothpick Sally: Okay Cadets. Rawls wants this wedding to be perfect, so your mission is to give him the space wedding ever.
Queen of Diamonds: I love weddings! The bride and the groom getting married. It's romance in the air!
Eleven of Hearts: I know. I totes love weddings!
Bebe: I love them too! They're amazing!
Bessie: I got my wedding planning badge after getting a couple married.
Professor Chaos: I, Professor Chaos, do not like weddings. I'm a supervillain.
Honey Queen grabs his collar.
Honey Queen: Listen here, boy! You're not gonna act all villainous on us today! So either you help us prepare for the wedding, or I'm gonna smack you across the face! Understand?!
Professor Chaos: (Scared) Yes...
Honey Queen: Good!
She lets go of his collar.
William: Nichole, what did your mother and I say about threatening to smack people across the face?
Honey Queen: Sorry. I was just trying to snap him out of his villainous phase.
Mrs. Daniels: It's fine, but next time, don't threaten anyone.
Millie (South Park): Anyway, let's make this the best wedding ever!
Everyone: Yeah!
(Play Open the Door to Your Heart by Darrell Banks for the rest of this section.)
The Space Tree Cadets begin to set up the wedding for Rawls and Charlene. Bessie puts up a happy wedding day banner. Queen of Diamonds becomes her alter ego Lola and she wears her flower girl outfit that Leni made. Kevin Stoley blows some balloons so they can be ready for the wedding. Meanwhile Rawls grabs a fancy wedding suit from a random store in Space. He then flies back to the Space Tree after paying for it. Everyone else continues cleaning up the wedding room. Snoopy washes the walls while the South Park moms clean the floors. Bessie creates a just married sign and then puts it on the back of the ship.The dance room was already cleaned up by the Loud family so everyone can dance after Rawls and Charlene get married. Linda Stotch puts some food in the dance room so everyone can eat while they're dancing. After a whole day of setting up the wedding, they were all done.
Bessie: All set for the wedding!
Ben: Yeah. Rawls and Charlene are gonna be happy to see all of this!
The song ends.
(Play I Do Love You by Billy Stewart for this section and skip to 0:32.)
Rawls gets in a hot tub, which is now in his office.
Colonel Rawls: Ahhh... That bachelor party Sureshot threw for me was amazing. Now to relax so I can get ready for bed and be all freshened up for my wedding. (He sighs) Now I'm gonna be raising a child, who's gonna be due sometime after the wedding since she's been pregnant for 8 and a half months. I'm excited to be a father. Maybe I'll share my office with Charlene. Yeah. She'll love that. I'll tell her after the wedding.
He continues relaxing and the song ends.
(Play How Sweet It Is [To Be Loved By You] by Marvin Gaye for this section.)
The next day, it was now time for the wedding. Everybody in the Space Tree entered the wedding room and are ready to get watch Rawls and Charlene get married.
Bessie: This wedding is gonna be a success!
Lola (Loud House): You said it.
Lana: Yup.
Lola (South Park): Hey. It's been a while since we met.
Lola (Loud House): Yeah. You traveled to Royal Woods to help me with my pageant.
Lola (South Park): Yeah. I saw you win.
Lola (Loud House): True. Anyways, I hope the bride and groom enter soon.
Rawls exits his office in his tuxedo.
Colonel Rawls: Okay. Time for the best wedding a Space Colonel could ever have.
Randy approached him.
Randy: Hey Rawls. It's great that you're getting married.
Colonel Rawls: I know.
Randy: So... How did you and Charlene meet?
Colonel Rawls: So you want the story of how me and my soon to be wife met? Well, here's the story.
(Play Walk Away from Love by David Ruffin for this section.)
Flashback
Colonel Rawls (Narrating): This is the story of how I met Charlene. It was during my days at the academy. She was a new student at the time. We had space training and she was the best at everything. I had a crush on her, but I was too shy to talk to her. She was the greatest girl I have ever met. Tanner also had a crush on her and we competed to see who wanted to be her lover. (It then showed a young Rawls asking a young Charlene to the dance.) I asked her to the academy's space prom and we had the best night of our lives. Unfortunately, her parents didn't approve of me and wanted her to date a much better looking boy. And then she and Tanner started dating, but she never forgot about me. We still kept in touch everyday. But her parents made a big mistake because they realized that Tanner wasn't a good boyfriend. He was a massive jerkface to her. He forced her to marry him and they did. But when she got pregnant a few months ago, she divorced him and started to find me. She flew through the Galaxy to find me, but she ended up getting stuck on Tundra. Luckily, the Quadrarians rescued her and she was taken care of by their current Queen. Thanks Sea Lizards for helping her by the way. And then after she was okay, she flew back on her journey to find me.
End of Flashback
It was back to the present.
Randy: So the sea lizard people took care of her on their home planet?
Colonel Rawls: Yeah. That's what she told me.
Randy: Okay. Anyways, see you at the wedding.
He leaves and the one of his personnel approached him.
Space Tree Personnel: Sir, Charlene is about to have the baby.
Colonel Rawls: What?! Where is she?!
Space Tree Personnel: She's in one of the hallways.
Colonel Rawls: Oh no. I'm coming, Charlene!
(Play Stop! In The Name of Love by The Supremes for the rest of this section.)
Rawls runs through the Space Tree and he is searching for Charlene.
Colonel Rawls: Charlene? Charlene?! Where are you?!
Charlene: (From a distance) Ah!
Colonel Rawls: I'm coming Charlene! (He continues to run through the Space Tree hallways until he sees Charlene.) Charlene, you okay?
Charlene: I don't think I'm gonna make it to the alter. My water broke and I need to be taken to the medical room!
Colonel Rawls: Don't worry. (He picks up Charlene.) I'll get you there. Besides, having the baby is more important than the wedding right now.
Charlene: Thanks Rawls.
Colonel Rawls: You're welcome. Now let's head to the medical room!
(Play Reasons by Earth, Wind and Fire for this section.)
Rawls starts running while carrying a pregnant Charlene, who is breathing a lot.
Colonel Rawls: Don't worry. I've got you. Just try to hang on until we get to the medical room.
Charlene: Okay!
He continues to run as fast as he could while holding Charlene. One of his personnel saw him carrying Charlene.
Space Tree Personnel: Hey Sir! What's going on?
Colonel Rawls: She's about to have a baby! Head to the alter and tell everyone to put the wedding on hold! That's an order!
He continues to run while holding Charlene, who is still breathing heavily.
Space Tree Personnel: Okay.
While he heads to the alter, Rawls continues to carry Charlene to the medical room.
Colonel Rawls: Don't worry. We're almost there. Just don't push until we get to the medical room.
Charlene: Um, Rawls?
Colonel Rawls: Yeah. What is it?
Charlene: I see 2 people holding glass!
Colonel Rawls: Oh crap.
Charlene: You're gonna have to toss me over them.
Colonel Rawls: Aren't you pregnant?! Won't it hurt you and the baby?!
Charlene: I'll be fine and so will our newborn baby, so just do it!
Colonel Rawls: Okay! Anything for you, sweetie!
At the 1:35 mark of the song, everything is in slow motion as Rawls tosses Charlene in the air and he begins to slide under the glass. The two personnel holding it notice them. The slow motion ends as Rawls gets up after he stops sliding and catches Charlene. They continue to make their way to the medical room.
(Play California Soul by Marvin Gaye and Tammi Terrell for this section.)
Everybody in the alter are still in their seats waiting for Rawls and Charlene. Bessie was listening to the song on her Zune and humming the lyrics. Gwen then looked at it.
Gwen: Um... May I ask what song you're listening too?
Bessie: California Soul.
Gwen: Which version?
Bessie: Marvin and Tammi's version. It was released shortly after Terrell died.
Gwen: Okay.
Bessie: Do you guys want to listen to it?
Portia: No. We're good.
Bessie: Okay.
Lola (Loud House): Ugh... Where are they?! We worked really hard on this wedding!
Penny: Maybe they got lost in space?
Nelly: No, dumbass! They wouldn't go out into Space on their special day!
Angela: So Butters...
Butters: Oh no.
Angela: Maybe we can have a wedding like this one day.
Butters: But what if I don't want to marry you? I could just may any other girl.
Angela: I'll just get rid of them so I can have you all to my self! You're my Butterbear and you will always be my Butterbear!
She hugs him really tightly, and he is uncomfortable.
Butters: Fellas, she's making me uncomfortable! Can you get her off me?!
Lynn: Why should we? You two are perfect for each other.
Butters: No we're not! She's really crazy! She keeps using all of my toothbrushes and keep taking all of my underwear! I'm down to my swim trunks because of this!
Craig: Maybe she should get a life on Craigslist.
Tweek: Ha! Good one!
Angela growled angrily.
Charlie Brown: What's taking them so long?
Linus: I don't know. It's not usual for the bride and groom to be late to a wedding.
Marcie: They're probably running late.
Peppermint Patty: We worked so hard on this wedding and they're gonna be late?!
Carlos: Hey Señorita Lucy. Maybe we can have a wedding like this.
Lucy (Peanuts): Yeah right! I'm not into hot Spanish jerks. I'm into beautiful blonde musicians, like Schroeder.
Schroeder: You know I still hate you, right?
Lucy (Peanuts): I'm just you're just joking.
Kyle: Carlos, how did you get out of that deportation center?
Carlos: I told the guards that I was innocent and they let me out and my parents were allowed to come back to the United States. We decided to take a ship to this place.
Kyle: Oh okay.
Shelly: I hope you don't manipulate any more girls.
Carlos: Bitch, please! I'm a changed boy!
Stan: Don't call my sister a bitch!
Toothpick Sally: No fighting in here!
Chance Sureshot: We should put the wedding on hold until we find them.
One of the staff enters.
Space Tree Personnel: Rawls is in the medical room with Charlene. She's about to give birth, so put the wedding on hold!
Everyone gasped.
Recap Robot: We must head to the medical room immediately.
Toothpick Sally: Okay. Let's go.
They left the alter while some others follow them.
They entered the medical room and noticed Rawls and Charlene with their new baby boy.
Colonel Rawls: Hey Everyone. Meet our new baby boy Toby.
Charlene: Isn't he cute?
Bessie: Aw! He's adorable!
Charlie Brown: Yeah. Congrats.
Colonel Rawls: Thanks.
Linus: You're welcome.
Charlene: It's too bad we have to put the wedding on hold.
Medical Staff Member: I know. How about you have your wedding tomorrow?
Colonel Rawls: That's a good idea.
Sally: I know! Toby can watch you guys get married. That's the first thing he'll witness.
Charlene: That's a good idea. Let's do it.
The next day after Charlene was released from the medical room...
(Play Wedding Bell Blues by The 5th Dimension for this section.)
Peppermint Patty: Looks like it's time for the wedding for real.
Lynn: Yeah. Here they come!
Sally, who is dressed as the flower girl, walks down the alter and drops flowers on the ground as Rawls and Charlene hold hands.
Toothpick Sally: Recap, when they get to the stand, give them their wedding rings.
Recap Robot: Okay.
Rawls and Charlene approached the stand as Father Maxi is about to get them married. Recap Robot approaches the stand with the rings.
Father Maxi: We are all gathered here to celebrate the wedding of Colonel Rawls and Charlene Roseworthy. Rawls, do you take this nice woman to be your lawfully wedded wife?
Colonel Rawls: I do.
Father Maxi: And Charlene, do you take this amazing colonel of this space station to be your lawfully wedded husband?
Charlene: I do.
Father Maxi: Okay. Since you vowed to keep your marriage permanent as long as you shall live, you may now kiss the bride.
(Play the Wedding March for the rest of this section.)
Rawls and Charlene kiss and everyone in the room cheered.
Sally: Let's party!
Charlie Brown: But who's gonna watch the newborn baby?
Security Guard: I'll watch him while you guys enjoy your party.
Colonel Rawls: Okay. Make sure nothing happens to him.
Security Guard: Yes Sir. Now let's head to the party!
Everyone: Yeah!
(Play Dancing in the Street by Martha Reeves and the Vandellas for this section.)
Everybody is now in the dance room dancing while the security guard is not only standing outside the room, but watching Toby. Rawls is dancing with Charlene.
Charlene: You're an amazing dancer, Rawls!
Colonel Rawls: Glad you think so, Honey.
Charlie Brown: This has been an amazing wedding.
Linus: I agree. This is the greatest.
Butters is drinking some punch when Angela approached him.
Angela: Hey Butterbear.
Butters: Please don't call me that.
Angela: Oh Butters, you know how much I love you.
She hugs Butters tightly again.
Butters: Ah! Let me go!
Angela: Oh Butters... I will never let you go.
Butters: Someone get this crazy girl off me!
Colonel Rawls: Angela, stop making Butters uncomfortable! That's an order!
Angela: Fine. (She lets go of Butters.) You guys are no fun.
Charlene: You're great at commanding people.
Colonel Rawls: Thanks, honey.
Snoopy dances as Flashbeagle while everybody claps for him.
Lincoln: This wedding has been successful.
Clyde (Loud House): You said it, Buddy.
They all continues dancing to the song.
The next morning, Rawls and Charlene are about to go on a honeymoon.
Colonel Rawls: Make sure you take good care of our son until we get back.
Charlene: Yeah. And make sure nothing happens to him!
Chance Sureshot: Okay. Enjoy your honeymoon.
(Play I Can't Help Myself [Sugar Pie, Honey Bunch] by The Four Tops for the rest of this chapter.)
Colonel Rawls: You ready?
Charlene: Yeah. Let's go!
They blast off into space while their ship has a just married banner.
Colonel Rawls: This is gonna be the best honeymoon ever.
Charlene: You said it.
Screen goes blank and the credits roll for 30 seconds.
Stay tuned for episode 45.