Why. The FUCK. Did I. Agee. To LUNCH? Blossom Utonium, of all the people in the world that I wanted to avoid this year, top of the fucking list is Blossom Utonium. I've been so focused. Cityville took most of the bad boy out of me and without the need to be a RowdyRuff, without HER I've been able to reinvent and apply myself in a healthy direction. I came to Townsville U to be a designer. Your attire says a lot about your reputation and the way you can shape it. So I'm a Business major with a minor in Fashion Design. What the fuck does the Psychology of Sex have to do with either of those? Well, sex sells. Might as well discover a way to make it empowering and profitable depending on the audience. At the time, it seemed like a good idea…
I wanted to stay under the radar. The less people talk about "the guy with red eyes" the lower the chance of running into her. My brothers are on board but Boomer's been saying Bubbles hates his guts since we got here this summer. I don't think that's the case, but that's none of my business. Butch has grown this random unhealthy obsession with Buttercup, but again, none of my business. Just keep under the fucking radar.
Talking Butch off the ledge from bombarding Buttercup and blowing our cover made me late to class that day. That's how I landed in that damn seat and she had been watching me the whole time. Waiting, plotting. What the fuck were you studying me for Blossom? Clearly I wasn't a threat, but after that "discussion," she switched her tactics on me completely. She's been fucking with my head.
The touching, the eyes, the skirt, the fucking aroma, and to top it all off, my name on her perfect plump lips? Why the fuck are you on me, Blossom Utonium?
"Why the fuck did I agree to lunch?" I all but exclaim to Butch on the phone outside of the coffee shop Pinky and I planned to meet at. Today is the day.
Butch: "Because you want to smash!"
"HELL NO, THE FUCK MAKES YOU THINK THAT?" My brother is fucking delusional. I'm not even like that anymore. I'm focused.
Butch: "The fuck you don't?! Bro, before this class you were on some no wank all hustle bullshit and now I can hear you at night through the fucking walls! I thought we were haunted or some shit!"
I wish he were lying. Like I said, she's been fucking with my head. "I'm in a SEX CLASS, it doesn't necessarily mean I want to smash her."
Butch: "Who the fuck else would it be?! I don't know about you, but I'm getting my Butters the moment finals are over. Your "Pinky" wants you right now and to be honest, you could use her."
"You don't even know her right now! This is a whole different Pinky!" I hate arguing with Butch. Especially when he makes Butch sense.
Butch: "I don't give a fuck if she's missing a pinky now! I know who you are when she's around you! You don't have to go all the way back to the old you but damn bro, I miss that guy."
He has a point. After Cityville, I became more rigid with myself and my expectations. I got comfortable with blending in and not needing anything else but reinventing my reputation. Maybe the old me wasn't all bad after all? I turn to face the shop and she's propped in the doorframe waiting for me to finish my call. Shit, how long has she been there? Bitch, has super hearing…
"Butch I gotta go, Pinky's waiting for me to give her these notes," I begin to hang up the phone.
Butch: "Make sure you give her the -"
*Click*
I shove the phone in my pocket and think about a game plan to avoid this conversation. Best not to mention it. She may not have heard anything, right?
"Hey, sorry I didn't know you were inside already," I scratch my head through my hat. Better to feign nonchalance. "I would've come in sooner."
She gives me a sly smile and begins to pull me by my arm into the establishment. "It's okay, there was a line and a small wait for a table to be cleared off. The place has died down a bit and they're ready for us if you are?"
Okay, that's good at least we'll have some privacy when this goes up in flames. "Sure thing, Pinky. Lead the way."
I follow her to the booth in the secluded back corner of the room. Study corners. Circle-shaped booth and table with one way to get in designed for ultimate privacy. What is she planning?
She slides into the booth and I slide in after her. We're mostly across from each other so nothing to "cozy" about our proximity.
The waitress arrives to take our order. "Anything I can get you guys?"
Pinky perks up and cheerily gives her order, "I'll have the mocha strawberry affogato."
The waitress finishes writing her order down. "And you?"
"I'll just have the cherry cold brew, thank you." So far so good all of this seems normal. Until Blossom pulls out her card to pay.
"Here feel free to close it out, I know you guys close soon and we'll be able to get out of your hair quickly so you guys can go study." She motions her card to the waitress.
"No, here take my card," I quickly interject.
What the fuck is her game? Isn't this a date? No, not a date. A study date? Barely, more like a 'copy my notes and let's agree to leave each other alone date.' Either way she's not fucking paying.
She leans across the large table and lowers my wrist holding my card. Touching, again. "No, I insist. You're letting me copy your notes and I'm eating up your study time. It's just a gesture."
This girl is fucking gorgeous. Full lips, perfectly pierced nose with freckles dancing along the top of it. She's got those big pink, knowing eyes with heavy curtain bangs framing her face. Thank god she wore a high neckline, but the side boob contrasting this racer-style black top doesn't hurt at all. She has a few freckles there too. I wonder if she has any more?
By the time I snap out of my stupor, it's too late. The waitress is gone and Blossom's card is nowhere in sight.
"I could've bought drinks," I futilely re-offer to her. "It's no big deal."
"Then it's no big deal that I bought them." She chuckles. "Do you have the notes?"
Right, the reason we're here. "Um, yeah here," I hand her my iPad. "Just scroll to the days that you missed and… copy them? Are you still a pen and paper notetaker?"
She laughed and tucked some hair behind her ear, "Yeah, sometimes, but I'm just gonna send these to my iCloud if that's okay?"
"Yeah, that's cool." A way to contact you, that's convenient. Or maybe this is all in my head. She seems normal. Blossom-y. I guess all the subtle "signs" I thought I was seeing were just my pent-up tension.
The waitress comes back and drops off our drinks and bill. Blossom takes a break from note-sending to dig into her affogato. And she lets out this sound that nearly makes me choke on my coffee. Is that what you sound like?
"Oh my god, you have to try this," She says angling the dessert towards me with a vice grip. "It's almost better than sex."
"Almost?" Shit, I didn't mean to say that aloud.
She chuckles and takes another bite. "Missed your chance! Yes, almost. I know people like us don't always get the best partners but there are ways to still have great sex." She lifts the spoon out of the cup and holds it in front of her mouth. "Psychology says so." She takes the bite and flips the spoon in her mouth to get every last bit.
It makes sense now. Blossom Utonium is trying to kill me.
"What're you in this class for anyway, Brick?" She asks. There goes my name, again. "Aren't you a business major?"
I just have to keep the conversation. Keep it cool. "Uh, I'm a Fashion minor. I'm using this class to help change the way we enforce dress codes in the workplace and to help create clothing that can be sexy and empowering."
She squints and studies me while releasing the spoon from the confines of her mouth. She concludes her internal analysis and points the utensil in my direction. "Like Ms. Bellum."
Where the fuck did that come from? "Sort of? Ms. Bellum is a good example but the uniform could probably still use some reworking. The neckline, the skirt-"
"I got it!" She interrupts me. "You're in this class because you wanted to fuck Ms. Bellum!"
Now where the fuck did THAT come from?! "The fuck? No. I mean, yeaaah. But, no. That's not-"
"I totally get it," Blossom mumbles through a mouthful of ice cream and espresso. "She's so fucking hot you didn't even need to see her face to want to fuck her."
What is happening?! "I RESPECT Ms. Bellum!"
She is still going. "You can respect her and still wanna fuck her. The body on that woman." She makes an exaggerated hourglass motion with her hands. While sucking down the melted parts of the dessert through her straw.
"IT'S NOT HER BODY THAT I'-"
"So what, you got a thing for redheads?" She effortlessly pushes her finished dessert to the end of the table and fixes me with a knowing smirk.
Dead. Blossom Utonium just killed me, and she didn't have to lift a pinky. "I didn't say that."
"Who do you get off to?" She's leaning across the table now. Too close. "I bet you fantasize about what face she makes."
Who are we talking about right now?
She lets out a long sigh and leans her head back against the seat. "Or better yet," she makes direct eye contact with me and she looks wilder than I've ever seen her. I can't look away. "Who's face does she have when you think fucking her and entangling your hands in her red, copper hair?"
Then I hear it. A slight hum from her side of the table, the lightest sheen of sweat on her brow, and the rise and fall of her chest. Pinky brought a toy to lunch in broad fucking daylight. Who is this woman? I flick my eyes up and down her body in shock and… something else. My body begins to live up to my name. She smiles at me and the vibrations get a little louder.
"Are you insane?" I ask her in a voice lower than usual. "There's people in here."
"Slightly," Her voice was a mix of light, fluttery, and gravel. Music to my ears. "There's only one person here and she's in the back waiting for us to leave so that she can lock up."
She puts the remote on the table. "Why fantasize? Make me your fantasy."
I know I shouldn't. I know it's wrong and indecent. Everything that screams "bad," but I pick up the remote anyway. She is my fantasy and it's been taking all of me to fight it, to keep my focus. So maybe if I indulge just this once, just this little bit, I can be free of her. But I can't let her go without the challenge. I unbuckle my pants. Maybe I'm a little insane too.
"Ms. Bellum you should know that I'm a good man now, and I don't plan on bringing any harm to this city," I whisper so only she can hear and increase the intensity on the remote.
"I believe you," She breathes, "but will the rest of Townsville if I say you've committed a crime?"
"Why would you say that?" I ask her. Interesting turn Pinky.
"I believe we both have something to gain here. I can grant you the free life you want-" she starts.
"But?" I take the bait and ease into my ministrations.
"There's something you must do for me first." Blossom licks her lips. "I am the most protected woman in this city, Mr. Jojo."
"Yes, I'm aware," I give the remote a slight increase. "Whatever you need Ms. Bellum."
Blossom bites her bottom lip while gripping the edge of her seat. She looks at me with those sultry, knowing, pink eyes.
"I turn my back to you and walk over to the mayor's desk. I look at you over my shoulder and say, I need something that doesn't require protection."
"I push you onto the desk lifting your skirt. Teasing you with one hand and pushing your hair out of your face with the other to kiss you." We are insane.
"I stop your hand from moving my hair and tell you, you don't get to see my face until the end." Him, is not the devil, the devil is a redhead.
"I plunge my fingers into you and make work of your blazer. You can tell I'm not pleased with the arrangement." I increase the vibrations by two notches.
Blossom moans at the sensation and replies, "I love being the boss."
"I play and suck on your breasts before removing your panties and going down on you." One more notch.
Blossom clutches her tits through her shirt and spreads her legs in the booth. At this point, she's grinding into the seat and I'm going full speed on myself at the sight of her. I actually hate this woman. She brings out the worst in me.
"I yank you up by your hair and tell you to stop teasing and fuck me already." She grits through clenched teeth.
"As you wish." I set the vibration as high as it could go and placed it back on the table. I've been ready to let go of it so I can focus. On me, on her.
Blossom gasps and strains her neck to the ceiling with clenched eyes. I can tell she's holding on for dear life. I'm right behind her. Her breathing is ragged and she is even better than I imagined. Blossom in the classroom, Blossom in my bedroom, even Blossom as Ms. Sara Bellum. Nothing beats Blossom in this booth right now.
Her breathing begins to slow and she begins to emerge out of her stupor. She leans across the table with both hands sprawled on the surface. She tilts he head to the side looking up at me through lazy but clear eyes.
"Oh Mr. Jojo," Her voice comes back to herself. "If you want to see what my face looks like, you've got to earn it in real life."
Blossom snatches the remote from the table and turns the device off. I detach my hand from myself like a hot iron. I hate her, I hate her, I hate her.
She fixes her posture and prepares to get up while I tuck myself back into my jeans.
"That was hot," she said sliding out of the booth. "You almost had me there. Coming?"
I silently slide out of the both after her and follow her out of the coffee shop. I don't know what to feel right now. Liberated, vulnerable, but more than anything challenged. Pinky has been sizing me up since the moment I walked into class that day. Here I was playing it safe, playing small. Does Pinky think she can beat me? I invented sex appeal. I am her wildest fantasy. She is merely a mirror of everything I actually am. She thinks she has so much self-control. No, Pinky just hasn't been fucked right. She could use someone like me.
I blankly look over to her while standing in front of the shop. "Where's your dorm?" I ask.
A sinister smile begins to creep across her beautiful face and the Femme Fatale says, "Race you there."
I follow her pink stripe in the sky to a white building on the east side of campus and land on the second balcony.
Thanks for reading!