(A/N: Now the cops, Mario, and Peach learned that Bowser Jr. is the one behind the mess, and he's a little liar, just like his father. It seems that in the royal Koopa line, the apple doesn't fall far from the tree. Enough of that; I'll get this chapter started for you guys!)
It was going to take a few days for them to get the forensic evidence from the paintbrush, and during that time, Mario and Bowser Jr. both took lie-detector tests, just to see who was telling the truth, and they were also going to do a maternity test to see if Princess Peach really was Bowser Jr.'s mother. Peach also took a lie-detector test, to further prove to Jr. that she was not his mom.
Even though the cops already had the idea that Mario was as innocent as a kitten, they figured it would be smart to do the tests just to humor Bowser Jr. And to see just how much of what he said was true. Mario and Peach agreed that it would be easy to just take the tests. Plus, it would be kind of funny to see how stupid Jr. was going to look when they proved him wrong.
But waiting for the results to come back was not going to be an easy chore, because as far as Jr. was concerned, he was the innocent one, Mario was the guilty party, and Peach was simply lying about not being his mom because she was under Mario's spell.
However, until they learned the real truth, the cops put both Mario and Bowser Jr. to work, with Peach helping them watch the pair to make sure the work was getting done, and that Jr. wouldn't attempt to do something stupid, like steal Mario's invention. The island really needed to be cleaned up, and even though the cops had a good feeling that Mario was an innocent man, he still had to work until his innocence was proven.
"When the results come back and I'm proven innocent, boy, are you gonna be sorry, Mario, you big bully! It means you'll also have to surrender Mama Peach to me, and there's nothing you can do about it!" Bowser Jr. proclaimed on the first day of work as they cleaned up the road to the Big Windmill in Bianco Hills.
Jr. was using a mop and rags to clean up the mess he made while Mario was using F.L.U.D.D. There was no way the cops were going to give Jr. a machine like F.L.U.D.D. It looked to be a pretty complicated piece of machinery for kids, and because Jr. was a kid, he might break it if he wasn't careful.
Mario was doing his best to keep quiet and not reply to Jr.'s mean words. He wanted to ignore the kid, but that wasn't what Jr. wanted him to do. Jr. really wanted Mario to try and say something really mean to him, but he didn't. Mario had to think about something else to say that didn't involve hurting Jr. Then he got an idea.
"Right... But I was thinking, Jr.: how about we make this a little more interesting? You know, we can make a deal about Peach's maternity and lie-detector tests when the results come in?" Mario asked the child.
Jr. was not really expecting Mario to say something like this, but he did have to wonder what Mario was getting at with this suggestion of his. He decided to play along, even though he knew he had to be careful, just in case Mario was trying to catch him off-guard.
"Oh! Okay, what kind of a deal?" Jr. asked, a little warily.
"Well, if the results say that Peach really is your mother and you're the innocent one here, then I will clean up all of Isle Delfino without complaint." Mario began, knowing that it really was best to humor the little brat.
"Good! If I were you, I'd start saving my strength, Mario. You're going to need it all when the results come in!" said Jr. with a big smile, feeling confident that the results would be what he wanted to hear.
Peach frowned. She really hoped that no one would tamper with the results of the maternity test, for she already knew that she wasn't Jr.'s mother. She didn't want to be his mom, for the kid added her name to the parental title, which was very disrespectful to her.
"Not so fast, kiddo! There's still a chance that the results might say otherwise, you know. So if it turns out that Peach is not your mother and you're the guilty party... then you're going to clean up Isle Delfino instead, without my help." Mario finished.
The cops heard this and nodded their heads at each other. They had decided that yes, it was more than a fair enough punishment for the child. Their plan was that if the lie-detector tests revealed that Bowser Jr. was indeed the culprit, then he should have to clean up the island. Plus, the Chief had said that when they were dragging him into the police station.
"What?! But... but that's not fair!" Jr. whined. He turned to the police and Peach and said, "Officers! Mama Peach! You have to tell him that's not fair!"
"I'm not your mother, so I say it's fair enough." Peach said.
"The lady is right, kiddo." said the rookie.
"Yeah. And I even said that you'll have to clean up the island if you're guilty of the crime. Oh, and I should warn you that you'll be using something even worse to clean up this place if you were lying about everything." said the Chief.
"All's fair in love and war, Jr. But the idea of you being wrong is just 'what if' for now. And remember, you're innocent until proven guilty, so you don't really need to worry about that sort of thing until the results come in." Mario told him.
Jr. couldn't figure out why Mario would even suggest such that they do this sort of thing, because he knew well that Peach was his mama. His papa told him so, and if he said it, then it had to be true. His papa would never lie to him, like Mario and Peach were doing.
"Have we got a deal, Jr.?" Mario asked, holding out a gloved hand.
If Bowser had been there, he more than likely would've told Jr. that anything suggested by Mario was a trap, so he shouldn't really accept it. But Bowser Jr. was so sure of the fact that Peach really was his mother, and he so badly wanted to see the look of pure shock on Mario's face when the tests proved that Peach was his mother that he said, "Deal!" And then he and Mario shook on it, making it official.
"All right. When the results come in, we'll find out who is going to be cleaning up the rest of the island." said the rookie.
"You don't really believe that the monster child is going to come out victorious, do you?" Peach nervously asked the police.
"Not at all, Miss. We just have to play along to humor him until we find out the truth." the Chief said.
Peach looked up and silently prayed to the Star Spirits that Jr. would really be proven guilty.
During that time, the sunlight began to return, for Shine Sprites were being recovered. Some of them reappeared as the island got cleaned up, and some had been stolen by Bowser Jr. (the cops had to inform the judge about this). But most of them came from the raccoon in the boathouse (who would have been arrested if he didn't give them back for free).
A few days later, they got the forensic evidence back. There were fingerprints on the paintbrush, but when the cops asked Mario for his fingerprints, they were not a match. Mario assumed that the prints belonged to the professor, since the paintbrush was his invention, and he was the one who made it.
"And I know they couldn't have been mine because I usually wear gloves, which don't leave fingerprints." Mario pointed out to the police, who nodded their heads. Mario was right. He hadn't touched it.
However, among the professor's fingerprints, they did find tiny claw-prints, which were from Bowser Jr. touching it, obviously. And they were a match. Bowser's weren't on it, for they would've been bigger, or maybe he had stolen it for Jr. and wore a glove when he did. This was proof that Jr. had been using it.
"Oh, those aren't mine." Jr. said about the tiny claw-prints upon finding out that they matched up to his.
"We saw you touch the paintbrush, so we know they really are yours." said the Chief.
"Well, there's something wrong with your eyes, because they're not mine." Jr. lied.
The cops decided to blow him off, and they turned to look at Mario and Peach. The princess politely asked, "Have the results from the lie-detector tests and the maternity test come in yet?"
"Oh yeah, they just came in!" said the rookie.
"And they're going to be revealed in the courthouse, so let's get a move on." the Chief said.
So Mario, Peach, and Bowser Jr. followed the cops to the courthouse. Everyone was quietly sitting in the courtroom, including the judge and prosecutor. They were all waiting patiently to go over the results of the tests. The only one not there was Bowser, because he didn't know what was going on.
Once everyone was seated, the prosecutor began to speak, "As everyone might have heard on the news and read in the paper, the accused, the possible criminal, and the princess have all taken lie-detector tests. The princess has also taken a maternity test, for the possible suspect thinks she is his mother."
No one in the room really seemed to believe that Peach was Jr.'s mother. She was a human, and he was a complete monster. The thought of a woman like Peach mothering a beast like Bowser Jr. was... barbaric, to say the least.
"Today, the results have come in, and it's time for all of us to find out the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth!" the prosecutor finished.
"In fact, we have invited a very special guest to come and read the results of the tests to us! And he happens someone all of you should know very well." said the judge.
The doors opened, and everyone looked in that direction to see a turquoise-colored Pianta walking into the courtroom.
"Oh my gosh! It's Joe Schmoe Piantana!" yelled a Pianta in the courtroom.
(A/N: I intended to use Maury Povich, but it wasn't allowed. So I had to think up this new host, and I thought him up quick. Hope you don't mind.)
Everyone except Mario, Peach, and Bowser Jr. recognized the famous Pianta at once and warmly welcomed him with a standing ovation. When the applause died down, Joe sat down in the witness stand and said, "A few days ago, I received a phone call asking me to come here and read the results of several tests."
"That is correct, sir." said the judge.
"Well, as you can see, I was happy to come and do it!" said Joe, which made the Piantas cheer again.
"Order! Order in the court!" the judge demanded, banging his gavel to quiet the people down. When the noise died down, the judge added, "We have three lie-detector tests, and a maternity test for you to read us the results of."
The prosecutor then held up 4 manila envelopes and handed them to all Joe.
"All right. Now which results should I go over first?" Joe asked as he carefully looked at each envelope. They were all neatly labeled with names on them, and they told what the results were for.
"Well, I really think we should save the DNA test for last. The first ones you go over should be the lie-detector tests." the judge explained.
"Yes, I was thinking the same thing myself. That's how I would be doing this if we were on the set of my show." Joe replied.
"And we decided that you should start with Bowser Jr.'s lie-detector results." said the prosecutor.
"Shouldn't I read Princess Peach's lie-detector test results first? You know, because of 'ladies first'?" asked Joe, looking at the envelope containing the results of Peach's lie-detector test.
"Actually, sir, I'm rather looking forward to hearing the results of Bowser Jr.'s lie-detector test." Peach spoke up.
"Yes, please read his results first." Mario said.
"Okay, then. Let's see here..." said Joe as he opened the envelope containing Jr.'s results. He looked at the paper, and got ready to read the results aloud.
Everyone in the courtroom went quiet, eager to hear the results. Jr. eyed Mario with a smirk as Joe began, "Okay, Bowser Jr., it says here that you were asked if the big paintbrush you were using was given to you by the old man who made it? You said it was, but it says here that you were telling a big, fat lie."
Jr.'s smirk disappeared, his skin turned pale, and his eyes went wide as everyone in the courtroom went, "Ohhhhhh!" Now it was Mario's turn to smirk at the look of horror on Jr.'s face.
"Then you were asked if you planned to use the paintbrush to pollute Isle Delfino? You said you weren't, but the lie-detector says you were lying again." Joe said.
Jr. was beginning to hate this. How could that lie-detector be so smart?
"You were asked if you knew that Mario and Princess Peach were coming to Isle Delfino ahead of time? You said you did, and the lie-detector said you were... telling the truth this time. All right, that's a first." Joe continued.
"Well, duh! That was a no-brainer!" Jr. said. He never would have come here if they weren't coming, or if he hadn't known.
"He had to have known we were coming here. But how in Grambi's name did he find out about it?" Peach whispered to Mario.
"I wish I knew, Peach." Mario replied in a whisper.
"You were asked if you intended to make a mess on the island and frame Mario for the crime? You said that you didn't, but that's not what the lie-detector thinks. It says here that you were telling another lie." Joe said.
"I wasn't lying! I just wanted Mama Peach back!" Jr. said.
"Okay, now we're on the final question. You were asked if you were trying to get Mario in trouble so you could take Princess Peach away from him? You said you weren't..." Joe started.
Peach looked happy when Joe referred to her by her real title, not the disrespectful one Jr. called her by.
"'Cause I was telling the truth." Jr. said.
"Actually, it says here that you were lying right through your little yellow teeth." Joe finished.
"It wasn't a lie, and I wasn't taking her away! She's my Mama, and I want her back!" Jr. yelled.
But after Joe had finished read the results of Jr.'s lie-detector test, no one really believed that Peach was the kid's mother. Especially because there was absolutely no physical resemblance between him and Peach. Add to that the lack of respect he showed her by adding her name to the parental title.
The Piantas were beginning to realize that they had Mario wrong! This Koopa brat was the one who had caused all the trouble on their island! Even though Jr. was clearly denying the results that said he was lying, there was no doubt in everyone's minds that he was the one they were supposed to be treating with hostility.
Then Joe decided he would read the results of Mario's lie-detector test next, which everyone seemed to accept. As he began to read the results, Jr. was praying that Mario would be proven to be nothing more than a dirty, rotten liar.
"Okay, Mario, you were asked if you came to Isle Delfino to take a nice, relaxing vacation. You said that you did, and the lie-detector said... Wow, look at this! You're telling the truth." Joe began.
Everyone began murmuring amongst themselves. So Mario and his friends were right about that.
"You were asked if you had ever been to Isle Delfino before you decided to take your vacation here. You said you hadn't, and the lie-detector says... you were telling the truth. That's two for two!" Joe read on.
Jr. was not happy. The results were supposed to say that Mario was lying; that he had been there before. But Mario was truthful.
"You were asked if you had any idea that the island was messed up prior to your arrival. You said you didn't know, and the lie-detector said... Three for three! You're telling the truth again." Joe added.
Everybody felt stupid for blaming Mario now. If he didn't know about the mess, then he couldn't have been responsible for it.
"Finally, you were asked if you ever planned on making a mess of Isle Delfino. You said nope, and the lie-detector said... you passed this test with flying colors! Give yourself a pat on the back, man!" Joe finished.
Mario smiled and did as Joe said. He gave himself a pat on the back.
"Oh Mario, I knew you'd pass the test! I just knew you would!" Peach said excitedly as she gave Mario a big kiss on the cheek, which had Mario blushing like mad. He always felt that way whenever Peach gave him a kiss.
Everyone on the island immediately said in unison, "We're sorry, Mario!" They were also going to make up for the horrid way they treated him, and they knew that they had to.
"You can't apologize to him just yet, people! The dude with the silly name still needs to tell me that Peach is my mama! Mario's not off the hook yet!" Jr. declared.
"Oh yeah, you still have to read the results of Peach's tests." the judge said to Joe.
"All right. Let's read Peach's lie-detector results now." said Joe.
There was still a good chance Jr. may be right about Peach. He listened intently as Joe began to read the results of Peach's lie-detector test.
"So, Princess Peach... You were asked if you were the one who planned this vacation to Isle Delfino. You said you were, and the lie-detector says... you're an honest lady, because you're telling the truth." Joe began.
Peach nodded her head. She was the one who had come up with the idea.
"You were asked if you invited Mario to join you on this vacation. You said you did, and... you told the truth again!" Joe went on.
Jr. looked angry at that. Of course she invited Mario along!
"You were asked if you told Bowser Jr. that you were coming here. You said no, and the lie-detector said you were right. You didn't tell him a thing!" said Joe.
"Of course she didn't tell me! Mama Peach told Papa she was coming here!" Jr. said.
"What in the world are you talking about? I did no such thing! I didn't even see your father around the time I planned this vacation!" Peach replied.
"Yes, you did! There was that day he was in the Mushroom Kingdom, and he said that you told him you were coming here!" Jr. said.
"No way! The only people I told were the people I invited, or planned to invite on this vacation, and Bowser Jr. and his father were left in the dark. How they found out is beyond me!" Peach said.
Joe looked at the judge and saw him frowning. This yelling was contempt of court, and Joe knew that it wasn't a good thing. So Joe said to the princess and Koopa, "Hey, the judge doesn't look too happy with you guys right now, and I'm not going to be happy if either of you get into trouble with the judge, so do you think you could maybe save the shouting match for later and let me get back to reading the results?"
"Oh! I'm terribly sorry for interrupting you, sir. Please continue." Peach apologized.
"Yeah, Mr. Tree-Headed Guy! Tell us all that she's my Mama!" Jr. said.
"You're in luck, kiddo, because that's what the next question involves." Joe told him before saying, "Princess Peach, you were asked if you and Bowser Jr.'s father ever been engaged in sexual intercourse. You said no! The lie-detector says... you were right about that."
Everyone in the courtroom (save for Joe and Bowser Jr.) all nodded their heads. They knew that Jr. had to be lying about Peach being his mother.
"You were asked if you gave birth to Bowser Jr. You said no again, and the lie-detector says that once again, you're telling the truth." Joe added.
Mario hugged Peach. He was glad that she was proving to everyone that she wasn't Bowser Jr.'s mother. She was always honest with him, and he loved her for it.
"You were asked if you ever signed any adoption papers to claim Bowser Jr. as your child? You said you didn't, and the lie-detector says... you're as honest as ever." Joe said, sounding happy.
Now everybody could plainly see that Jr. had lied about Peach being his mother.
"You were asked if you knew about Bowser Jr.'s existence before seeing him here on Isle Delfino. You said no, and the lie-detector says that you told the truth." Joe added.
Mario smiled, and so did Peach.
"Finally, you were asked if Mario had ever kidnapped you from Bowser Jr. and his father. You said no, and the lie-detector determined... you should pat yourself on the back, too. You're as honest as Mario." Joe finished, sounding really pleased.
So even Peach had passed the lie-detector test with flying colors. Mario and Peach shared a tight hug after that, with Mario patting her on the back.
"You know, it's not often that I get to read two good test results in a row, so this was actually very refreshing for me." Joe said as the Piantas in the courtroom began chanting his name. They were clearly enjoying this.
"Don't forget, sir. You still have one more test to read the results of." said the prosecutor.
"Oh, that's right. I almost forgot. It's time for me to read the DNA results!" Joe said.
Mario and Peach let go of each other. Of course, they still had the results of that test. But after hearing the results of Peach's lie-detector test, they pretty much knew what the results were going to be.
So Joe slowly opened the envelope and removed the results, trying to build up the suspense as the cheering died down.
"Get on with it already!" Bowser Jr. yelled.
"Hold your horses. I will." Joe calmly assured him. Then he looked at the results and read, "All right! It says here that when it comes to a kid like Bowser Jr., Princess Peach is..."
"My mama! She is my mama! I knew it! You lose, Mario, you losing loser! Have fun cleaning up the island while I take Mama Peach back to Papa! He's going to be so proud of me!" Bowser Jr. rudely interrupted before laughing fiendishly.
"Do you mind?! I wasn't done reading the results yet!" said Joe, sounding annoyed. He did not like when his guests would say what they felt the answer was going to be, whether or not they were right about it.
Mario turned to Bowser Jr., glaring daggers at him to shut him up. That actually scared Bowser Jr., causing him to freeze up, and the Chief seized that opportunity to hit Jr. with his taser, causing him to fall on the floor, on his face, ending his evil ways for the time being.
"Ow..." Jr. moaned softly, unable to believe that one of the cops had the gall to do such a thing to a kid like him.
"We're really sorry for the inconvenience, sir. Please finish." the Chief apologized to Joe as Bowser Jr. lay on the ground, in pain.
"Okay. As I was saying: Princess Peach is... to quote Baby Sinclair... NOT the Mama!" Joe read in a loud, clear voice.
Everyone in the courtroom didn't really seem all that surprised, but Mario and Peach were so happy that they shared a passionate kiss, glad that the results were exactly what they knew they'd be. In fact, the Piantas in the room all stood up, formed a neat, single-file line, and walked over to Mario so they could apologize for being so mean to him.
Each Pianta said, "I'm sorry, Mario." They said what they were sorry for, and then they promised him that now that the truth had come out, they were going to treat him nicer from now on. Mario was so relieved that he thanked the Piantas and accepted their apologies, forgiving them.
The Piantas also assured Peach that they knew she was not Jr.'s mother. They knew it because she looked nothing like him, and the fact that he showed her a complete lack of respect. Peach was glad to know that the Piantas were on her side.
Even though he was in pain, Bowser Jr. was completely floored! He was absolutely certain that Peach was his mama, but Joe said that she wasn't!
"Hey mister, did you just say that Peach isn't really my Mama?" Bowser Jr. asked Joe, who seemed to enjoy the sight of the Piantas politely talking to Mario and Peach.
"You bet I did, because that's what the results said." said Joe.
"But... that can't be true! Papa said she was my Mama! There has to be some sort of mistake!" Jr. exclaimed.
"I hate to break this to you, kiddo, but the DNA results never lie. She's not your mommy, and you're just going to have to ask your daddy who your real mommy is." Joe told him.
"Great..." Jr. moaned, knowing what this meant. Unless Mario decided to just call off the bet. Yeah, he'd never really go through with it!
"Hey, Jr., I'm sure you know what this means, don't you?" Mario asked Bowser Jr.
Apparently, Lady Luck was not on Bowser Jr.'s side.
"Dang it." Bowser Jr. moaned as the cops, the judge, and the prosecutor thanked Joe and paid him good money for taking the time out of his busy schedule to come in and read the results of the tests. He told them it was no trouble at all.
Mario and Peach even thanked Joe for his part in proving their innocence and Bowser Jr.'s guilt to everyone on the island. Joe told the lovebirds that he was more than happy to have done it.
So Joe Schmoe Piantana was able to read the results to prove that Mario and Peach were innocent, and Jr. was guilty! But the story is not over yet! Stay tuned to see more!