Chapter Eight: What It Means To Be Good

Chapter Summary: Uta reflects on the most important relationships in her life, gets some clarity from Eudora about what it means to be a gamma and overhears a conversation that prompts her to embark on her first real adventure.

AN: As mentioned before, there is a POV shift. This chapter takes us back through some events in the previous chapters from Uta's POV and we're not going to be in Shanks' perspective for a few more chapters. This chapter features a bit more about what happened to her during her abduction. Warnings in advance for references to child abuse, grooming, assault, murder, negative self-talk and victim-blaming.

Uta had always known that she lived in a small corner of the world.

Windmill Village in general was tiny when compared to the forest, mountains and sea which surrounded it, but beyond that, she knew that the world was bigger, wider, more wonderful than anything she knew in her little life.

Windmill Village was stifling with none of the adventure that she craved. She knew the island too well, knew all the songs that drifted on the breeze. The sea tried to bring her new melodies and rhythms, but Uta wanted to go out there and experience the music of the world herself, not just hear it secondhand.

The need to be anywhere else might've crushed her by now but most days the feeling was tempered by the presence of her twin brother. They spent their days together, doing what little adventuring they could in their small village, listening to the island's whispers in the waves, the air, the sand, the trees which Luffy was better at hearing than she was, the messages in the birdsong that Uta was better at picking up. Luffy watched the world, looking deeply at the colors of people's souls to tell when they were good while Uta listened to the songs within their heart to tell her about their souls. It required opposite senses but between Luffy's sight and Uta's hearing, they made it work and they built a constellation of people that they claimed within their small village. It was true that it was a very small constellation, just them and Makino. Grandpa too when he was around, plus Mayor Woop Slap when his song wasn't too annoying and his complaining wouldn't drown out the island's whispers. But there was something else out there.

Ever since she could remember, there had been a feeling in her chest that pulled her heart and mind towards the sea. There was an insistent, sometimes painful, tugging to be somewhere else, somewhere new. There was a place that was home to… something, something that was missing from her life, a song that was unfinished, a melody that she couldn't quite remember all the notes to, something that wasn't in Windmill. Uta didn't know what it was, couldn't even guess, but she knew that she couldn't find it if she stayed on Dawn Island. She had to leave one day, she had to explore the world to find that elusive thing.

Grandpa's stories had solidified that idea in her head. When he visited, bringing with him the staccato percussion of drumbeats and the lively blows of bagpipes and bugles, he would tell her and Luffy about his exploits on the sea with the rest of his crew aboard the Hounder. He'd dazzle them with tales of people he defeated or times when he survived the wrath of the sea. Uta would eat up every word, partly because any word from her grandfather was precious and rare, but also because it made it easier to picture herself living out those adventures. She longed to break free of her tiny corner of the world and experience the life her grandfather talked about.

She listened to his other stories too, the ones that Luffy bailed out on because they weren't fun. The ones Garp told when he was bleary-eyed and his loose lips could only produce slurred speech. The ones he told when his heartsong became less jaunty and turned to more of a dirge. She listened when her grandfather's voice grew weary and his shoulders sloped with an invisible weight. She listened as he spoke about regrets and atrocities, his disdain for Absolute Justice and the arrogance of false gods. His words were usually accompanied by the strong scent of his malt liquor, but Uta listened anyway, even when he didn't realize she was the one he was talking to. She listened to him denounce and praise the Marines in the same breath and she knew that she would never want to be as torn on anything in life as her grandfather was about this. It made her sympathize with him even when she grew angry at him for leaving all the time or throwing her and Luffy in the woods to train against monkeys or giving them knots on their heads from his dreaded Fist of Love.

She was adamant about not being a Marine and even though he'd say the twins were supposed to follow in his footsteps, she thought it might've been one of those situations where they were supposed to do the opposite of what he did even if he explicitly told them to do something: like when he offered them liquor which they were supposed to say 'no' to, or when he fell asleep at important moments which they weren't supposed to do because that was lazy, or when he ignored people during conversations which the twins should know better than because it was rude.

Grandpa was a walking contradiction that way. Even his heartsong was a contradiction, shifting from lively to somber in what seemed like seconds with little warning. It was enough to give Uta whiplash. The only person more of an anomaly in Windmill Village was Luffy. Well, anomalous to everyone except Uta. Even Grandpa didn't totally get Luffy, which was a shame because they were more alike than either would admit. That was probably why they argued so much. Uta had to learn to be a peacemaker at an early age to mediate between her warring family members. She had had to a mediate between Luffy and the rest of the world in general.

Lu strutted into life with a carefree smile and a zest for adventure, uncaring about whether he was seen as a freak or an outcast. He was able to look deeper than with just eyes, so he could see within people, see if they were good or bad. That sight was often what he built his worldview around, even if that made it terribly simplistic. Uta knew things and people weren't just good or bad, there were shades of both in most and that was reflected in their songs. Uta could do something similar to Luffy but for her, she didn't see into people, rather she could hear into them. A person's heart, soul, desires and goals laid themselves bare before her like musical notes, composing themselves into a song that only Uta knew the words to, one that only she could manifest into being. Most people didn't even realize the music that existed inside of them, the harmonies flowing through their blood, the melodies thrumming in their hearts. Uta was privy to it all just as Luffy was privy to the good and bad in others.

His simplistic view often made him run afoul of people who looked down on him, thought he was an idiot, out of place, naïve and foolish. That kind of thing never slowed him down for long and so the world would try to knock him down harder and harder every time. Yet, it never managed to succeed. Luffy's heartsong remained unchanged: jubilant drums beating out a peculiar rhythm, triumphant horns playing with a melody that was both gleeful and daring, strings strumming an enticing and inviting tune. Luffy's heartsong gave the distinct impression of warmth. It was a song Uta knew as well as she knew herself and it was one she never tired of, even when the world tired of her brother, but that was okay because that was what she was for. She was his big sister and she stood as a buffer between Luffy and everything else. Whether it was Grandpa or bullies or adults who saw him as an annoying pest or Luffy's own recklessness, Uta was always there to reconcile him with the world, to make sure that those two songs could co-exist.

And, yes, sometimes she made sure through violent means, but at the end of the day she was a Monkey D. Her grandfather taught her to always be ready for a fight and what better reason to fight than for Luffy?

Windmill Village was small, but Luffy was big, huge, enormous. His spirit was like a supernova, a bright burning sun that was always there to shine a light on Uta in her darkness and loneliness. Yes, there was something out in the world that she could not touch, a piece that her soul was missing that was flung out across the sea, a missing chord to the song of her life, but so much of her was held together by Luffy. Their souls were intertwined with one another, so much so that Uta knew when he was happy or sad, when he was hungry or angry. She knew his wants, his desires, his hopes and his dreams. She had realized years ago that Windmill Village would never be enough for him. He was too big to remain on this island. Dawn would never have enough color for him, his song would remain unfulfilled if it never got the chance to play out in the world. Even if she hadn't had her own desire to leave, she would've always ended up going because she would follow him to the ends of the world just like he would do for her. That wasn't really an issue though because he craved the same things as her, felt the same hole she did, and wanted the same freedom she longed for.

Luffy was even more vocal about never being a Marine even though he hadn't heard Grandpa's darker stories. He was always adamant about being able to do as he pleased, maintaining his independence and fighting for Uta's as well. They hadn't had much choice but to be self-reliant with Grandpa gone so often and the other adults always busy. So Uta and Luffy built a life that was just their own, made their own way as much as they could, made plans together for their future. Luffy was the one that lit the fuse to her dreams, made sure she knew that they would leave Windmill one day and they would go sailing, chasing after that thing that was calling to them, and they didn't have to be Marines to do it. They wouldn't be fishermen either. They didn't have a name then for what they would be, but she knew they would be together, just like they always were, their hearts producing a shared melody that bound them just as surely as the blood flowing in their veins did, and that was enough.

Until it wasn't.

Until he came and lied to her, used her dreams against her, used them to hurt her and Luffy. She left the island, just as she always wanted, but it was nothing like she hoped it would be. Luffy wasn't there and all that existed beyond Windmill's shores was pain. She endured a month's worth of pain until Grandpa came and ended it.

Uta had never seen so much blood in her life, nor did she know a man could scream the way Daku screamed as Grandpa hurt him, killed him, obliterated him. She hadn't witnessed it, Bogard had taken her away and brought her aboard the Hounder, but she could hear it: the blows and the screams, Grandpa's snarling and bellowing, Daku's begging and apologies near the end, the creaking her abductor's ship made as Grandpa broke it to pieces, the crackling of fire as it burned with Daku on it, still alive, until they both sunk below the waves, the way his song had risen in tempo and pitch before abruptly cutting off.

Grandpa's white Marine jacket had been dyed red when he returned, the smell of iron filling the cabin she was holed up in, shaking behind Bogard's legs as she listened to her Grandpa not just kill a man, but destroy him in Uta's name, leaving no trace of him behind, his song snatched from the world in gruesome fashion.

What Grandpa did had scared her, but what scared her more was that she felt relieved. Daku had paid for what he did to her, what he took from her, the lies he told her and the pain he caused her. His song didn't deserve to be heard, not when it had so completely deceived her. It felt like justice. That feeling made her think uncomfortably of Grandpa's stories and made her sick with herself.

She was happy to return to her small corner of the world after that, to her familiar songs and her beloved twin, and made no plans to leave that corner again, even as the tugging in her chest persisted, even as the call across the sea remained, even as her dreams beat against the steel trap she locked them in. She had tried to follow her dream and it had been the worst choice she ever made. She chose instead to follow the string inside of her that bound her to Luffy.

Lu was always a sure bet. It didn't matter if she was wrong or damaged or used. It didn't matter if no one else in the world wanted her, if they saw the darkness and wrongness in her the way Daku had seen it and turned their backs on her because of it. Luffy wouldn't care. His love was as certain as the rising sun. She knew that he would accept her no matter what, so when the sneers and turned noses began to be thrown at her, when the songs of some of the villagers became asynchronous and more of a cacophony in her ears, when they saw her as the demon Daku assured her she was, she did not fall apart completely because Luffy was there to hold her up, even when he didn't realize that's what he was doing. When she wanted to stay in bed or when she changed her name because hearing it reminded her of how Daku had said it or when she couldn't walk down the street without wanting to cover her ears because some of the heartsongs were so hateful, he had been the same twin brother she always knew him to be: loving, energetic, enthusiastic, seeing the best in her when she didn't see it herself. Her partner in crime in all things. Luffy had gotten her through the year after her abduction.

Luffy, and loathe as she was to admit it, Ace too.

She would never say as much to his face, she'd rather die first, but it was nice to be around someone who didn't treat her differently because she was a gamma. Ace was a jerk, a fact that didn't change after he knew what she was, what it meant and how it happened. His heartsong was loud and heavy, filled with shredding guitars and aggressive drumbeats and howling melodies that sounded like ghosts. Despite how domineering his song was, it was never hateful towards her, it never lashed out at her with cruelty no matter how unkind his words were. It was refreshing.

She was grateful because getting through that tough year had been enough for the sea to give her something back, just like Bogard said it would.

The night of Daku's death, Uta had laid in the captain's quarters of the Hounder, wide awake and shaking beneath one of her grandfather's cloaks while the alpha stayed on the deck, watching Daku's ship until the last piece of burning wood was claimed by the sea. Her grandfather's scent clung to the fabric and wrapping it around herself let her pretend it was the hug she desperately needed. Instead, he stayed outside and watched his handiwork while Uta laid curled up in his bed, shivers of disgust and terror wracking her small frame. Bogard stayed close, likely hoping his neutral beta scent would calm her down but it didn't do much. Grandpa's scent clinging to the cloak helped but Uta didn't think anything short of being back with Luffy would make her feel better. Bogard had taken her shaking as fear at what her grandfather had done and he had begun to reassure her in his usual curt tone.

"I know it may seem harsh now, but what Garp did was necessary against men like this Daku. It wasn't just a Marine dispatching a criminal or a grandfather protecting his granddaughter, he was challenged by another alpha who injured one of his pups and forced a bite on another. As pack elder, it was his duty to show not only that fiend but everyone else what happens if his own are threatened."

Uta did not reply to his words. His heartsong was as calm and unchanging as it always was, a slightly boring piano sonata with the faintest echo of a snare drum which Uta had come to associate with most Marines. Bogard was the picture of calm both inside and out but not even he could drown out the crashing cymbals and the blaring horns coming from her grandfather above deck, nor could his demeanor make her forget how suddenly Daku's song ended, stopping mid-phrase and echoing loudly in her ears even now.

"Don't worry, your grandfather has given something to the sea in your name. The sea will give you something back in return."

"She won't. I have a Devil Fruit now. Mother Ocean hates me."

Uta couldn't hear her whispers anymore. Her voice was always fainter to Uta than it was for Luffy, as were the voices of the trees, the winds and the leaves, not that Luffy cared as much to listen to Them as he did the sea. The sea's voice had become easier to decipher after Daku took her. As Uta sat terrified on her captor's boat, Mother Ocean would sing soothing songs of comfort to her, the waves rocking Daku's boat more than usual, akin to a parent rocking a cradle. All that stopped when she ate the Devil Fruit. She was now deaf to the few words she could hear before. She was abandoned, abhorred. The sea would give her nothing.

"Your Devil Fruit is irrelevant when it comes to this. This is an older, far more important exchange with the sea. Blood was spilt and given to Her. A foul soul offered over to Her to punish as She sees fit. She will give you a boon for removing such darkness from Her shores. The ocean is all about return."

Uta had not believed him for a long time. Why would the ocean reward her in exchange for something so violent? Daku wasn't good but Uta wasn't either. She didn't deserve a gift. Recently though, she had started to believe Bogard was right. Grandpa had given Daku to the sea and a year later, the sea had sent Shanks. With Shanks' arrival, the feeling in Uta's chest that had been pulling her towards something unknown suddenly had a destination, and it was him.

It wasn't something she acted on right away, not like Luffy. Once he decided someone was good, there was very little that was going to stop him from trying to befriend that person, even if Uta believed otherwise or didn't like their heartsong. She was suspicious of Shanks before she met him. Most adults didn't indulge kids, at least not without an ulterior motive, but these new pirates were showering Luffy with attention for seemingly no reason. Luffy would come back to Uta, practically glowing with happiness as he gushed about the newcomers.

"Lucky Roux cooks the best meats, and he gives me giant turkey legs."

"Yasopp tells boring stories sometimes when he's feeling sad, but he has great pirate wisdom and he can shoot a can with his eyes closed."

"Bonk Punch plays the violin and he has a monkey that can arm wrestle."

"Hongo taught me how to count cards and how to tell which berries are poisonous."

"Limejuice can juggle four beer bottles without dropping a single one."

"Building Snake has two swords that he can use at the same time."

"Gab is so strong he can lift a table with three men on it."

"Benn is so smart, almost as smart as you. He taught me the names of some stars."

"And Shanks? Well, he's just the best. He's tall and strong. I think he might even be as strong as Grandpa and I didn't think anyone else in the world was. He knows so much about the sea and he has the greatest stories. He wears a super cool hat and this glass wood bracelet thing. He's got scars because he's a strong pirate that other pirates want to challenge. He's an omega and Akihiro says that means he can't be strong or brave or a leader, but he's the captain and everyone listens to him. Well, most of the time 'cause Shanks says that if Benn is really mad at him, then what Benn says goes. He can be silly sometimes, but he's great. I want to keep him. Can we keep him?"

"Luffy, he's a pirate and a stranger. You shouldn't trust him so much."

"You have to believe me, Uta. He's different, he's good, I can feel it."

Luffy had had stars in his eyes as he described the Red Hair Pirates, his face lit with admiration, and it had given Uta a sinking feeling.

She remembered all too well how enchanted she had been with the last unknown visitor to come to Dawn's shores. Daku had seemed interesting and mysterious to her, his heartsong had been a dark timbre of sharp violins, a deep bass and a piano which only played in minor keys contrasting with a convivial piper's refrain. She hadn't known what to make of it and the enigmatic rhythm had lured her in much the same way Luffy was taken with these pirates. It put her on edge. She was Luffy's big sister, it was her job to protect him. She hadn't protected him from Daku, who Luffy never liked. Daku, who had punched Luffy in the face and broke his arm when the boy tried to wrestle Uta away from him. Daku, who had hurt Uta in unnamable ways and hurt Luffy by extension through their bond. She had never wanted him to feel the things she felt less than in that month of hell. It only made her feel angrier with herself and more disgusted that she hadn't been strong enough to fight Daku.

She wouldn't stand by and let something like that happen again, so she had observed them from a distance. Captain Shanks was hard to miss with his straw hat and red hair beneath it brushing against his scarred face. Luffy flitted amongst the pirates with carefree abandon but he always gravitated back to the captain, not that it was hard for Uta to guess why. The moment she saw him there was a tugging in her chest. She had gotten good at ignoring it over the past year, burying it deep down and focusing on the bonds she shared with Luffy and Grandpa. They were known and reliable. Following the unknown had led her to Daku, but the tugging didn't go away like it usually did when she ignored it long enough. It remained, dull and throbbing and pulling not towards the sea but towards the group of pirates. At first she thought it was pulling her to Luffy, but their bond was much softer, more suggestive and less demanding, comforting in its familiarity. This was harsh and insistent. It was pulling her towards the captain, not Luffy or the sea.

She narrowed her eyes in interest but still kept her distance as well as her mind closed, not wanting to hear any of the pirates' heartsongs. Rather than listening, she watched the captain and Luffy with a critical eye, searching for all the signs that she missed with Daku, the ones that Dadan drilled into her head during her weekend training. She followed them as Luffy and the captain left Makino's bar, hand-in-hand, the older man listening to Luffy's rambling without spacing out or telling him to shut up. Any jokes he made were in genuine jest and Luffy never seemed to mind them, not that he would've even if they were meant to be cruel.

Luffy took him to his and Uta's favorite windmill, which shocked her because they never took anyone there, not even Makino. Inside the hollow tower was where they kept any treasure that they found on the island or things Grandpa had brought back for them. It housed their sacks for the nights they slept there, which wasn't often lately since Makino had moved them permanently to her apartment above the bar. Uta didn't mind that. She loved Makino's song after all: gentle strums of a harp mingling with a melodious flute but backed by the strong chords of a cello, all conforming into a tune meant to comfort, meant to portray safety but also reflecting a quiet sort of strength. Even so, some nights the twins would tell Maki they were going to Grandpa's house and then go to their windmill instead. It was decorated with pictures they had drawn, songs Uta wrote, dreamcatchers Maki helped them make and books that Uta liked reading. It was a little haven that they created with each other to shut out the world. Now Luffy was bringing Captain Shanks into it.

Part of her felt indignant about that. He hadn't even asked her before he brought some pirate he barely knew into their space. Contrary to that feeling, she waited on bated breath to see what Shanks would say about it. She didn't know why she cared but she did.

"So… what do you think," Luffy had asked, nervously wringing his fingers as the omega man inspected the decorated walls, looked up at the glass top of the windmill which gave a view of the sky and noted the nesting birds in the rafters.

"I like it, Anchor. It's not often I meet someone with their very own windmill, you know?"

"Shishishi, silly Shanks. It's not mine, it belongs to the village. Uta and I just borrow it is all. One day, I hope we have a ship just as big as this."

"Oh, well you'll need a really big crew for that."

"Nah, just ten crewmates, like you. They'll be my closest friends, my nakama and my pack. We'll all be free together."

"I don't doubt that, Anchor. You've already got the makings of a great pirate. It's not just anyone that values freedom the way you do, and not just for yourself but for others too. Make sure you hold onto that when you manifest. It doesn't matter what your second gender is, you stay the same stubborn, fearless, crazy kid you are. I'll be sure to look out for your jolly roger on the seas."

"You know, I could start even quicker if you took me on your crew."

"Not happening," Captain Shanks replied, ruffling Luffy's hair.

"Aw, come on. I'm ready and I won't take up that much space."

"I've already got an anchor, kid,"

"I'm not an anchor."

The captain pointed to the anchor on Luffy's shirt before chuckling good-naturedly at the boy's resulting ire.

Uta watched them continue to banter back and forth but the unease she felt slowly ebbed away, enough for her to leave them alone. She couldn't trust herself to know when people were good or bad like Luffy could, but she knew just from that small interaction that Captain Shanks wasn't like Daku. She could already see some of where Luffy's admiration stemmed from, even without hearing the captain's heartsong. Shanks wasn't like most adults, who often grew annoyed with the sound of Luffy's voice after five minutes, the omega listened to every word Luffy said, even the silly ones. He didn't look down on Luffy's interests or mock him for anything. He was tall and handsome and even though his hat looked older than him, it somehow completed him. She knew that he was a pirate, but she didn't fear him, instead there was an allure about him.

Daku had an allure too but there had always been something underlying in his words even as they promised Uta the world, something darker in his song that Uta chose to ignore because Daku was nice to her. He told her she was pretty and the best singer, that she was meant to share her gift with the world like she always wanted. He didn't mock her when she said people's souls were music to her ears and that she could hear the songs inside of them, that her dream was to help the world hear the songs that only she was privy to. He was the first person to say that the world should hear her songs outside of Luffy and Makino and so it was a validating experience that made it easy to ignore the things that weren't right about him.

With Captain Shanks, she didn't feel that undercurrent. He was genuine in how he saw Luffy. She wasn't worried about him hurting Luffy the way Daku hurt her after that, but she still kept her distance from him, even after officially meeting him. She was glad Luffy had found someone to indulge him, she didn't want him to lose that when Shanks learned of his cursed sister. Most people reacted one of two ways when they realized she was a gamma: with disgust or pity. She didn't want to face either, so she gave the pirates a wide berth until her night terror when Shanks came and helped her, stopped her frantic mind from racing with scenarios that hadn't happened and brought her back to reality. He knew then what she was, there was no way he could be that close to her and not identify her scent, but it hadn't mattered to him. He helped her anyway, carried her back to Maki's bar and sang her to sleep.

When she woke up, she was surprised to see him still there, sleeping in a chair next to their bed with his straw hat resting over his face. The pull in her chest had gone wild, making it clear to her that at the end of that tether was him. She didn't know why or how. She only felt a similar feeling with Luffy, and Grandpa to a much lesser extent. The pull to Captain Shanks was a strong one, like there was a part of her that knew him despite him being a stranger.

Finally, she allowed herself to listen to him, truly listen with her whole heart and mind, to hear his song. She gasped as she recognized the chords of the strumming guitar along with the soft piano played in major keys, contrasting the minor key of Daku's heartsong sharply. Shanks' song consisted of drums similar to Luffy's, violins similar to Uta's and windchimes that were uniquely his own.

His heartsong completed the melody that had been forever unfinished in her mind.

She looked back at Luffy when she felt a shift in the bed behind her. He was wide awake and uncharacteristically quiet. He was staring at Shanks with a soft happy look on his face, his eyes big and restlessly taking the older man in. Uta recognized it as the look he wore when the joyful feelings got so big that they clogged up his throat and his chest so he couldn't speak. She had seen it directed at only a few people in their lives, people that Luffy considered to be family: Uta, Grandpa, Makino. Now Captain Shanks too.

Luffy's eyes switched to hers, a silent plea in them.

"Okay, we can keep him. But I have to find a present to thank him first."

Luffy had given her a light-beam of a smile and the two had quietly made their way out of the room and downstairs.

After that, it was easy to open herself up to Shanks and his crew, to get closer to them even if she didn't tell them everything. She didn't tell them how she could hear music inside of people nor did she mention she and Luffy could hear the voices of things people thought didn't have a voice. Partly because Grandpa had always forbidden the twins from telling anyone but also because she didn't want to give Shanks and his crew another reason to turn their backs on her. They accepted her being a gamma and accepted her Devil Fruit, she did not want to push her luck by adding her strange quirks to the mix. Luffy also kept quiet about it, mainly because his sight and hearing nature's voice came so naturally to him that he often forgot others didn't see or hear the world like he did. Besides, Luffy said so many weird and silly things that his words could easily be overlooked if he mentioned their secret. At least, if he mentioned it to anyone but Shanks. Shanks paid attention to everything they did, put weight in every word they said, cared about everything they were. It was unusual and strange in that most people didn't react to the twins that way. Uta desperately wanted to hang onto that precisely because most people didn't pay much attention to them.

In turn, she enjoyed being around the Red Hair Pirates, spending time with them and hearing their stories. She liked getting Gab, Limejuice and Building Snake to play tea party with her and pick out dresses. She liked brushing and braiding Hongo's hair. She liked learning how to throw really far from Yasopp and still hit something. She liked baking treats with Lucky Roux. She liked collecting shells with Bonk Punch and Monster. She liked fishing and stargazing with Benn. She enjoyed doing just about anything with Shanks. The Red Hair Pirates' individual heartsongs were always a delight to listen to, especially how they harmonized with the song they shared as pack and nakama. She quickly reached a place where she couldn't imagine her life going forward without them.

Shanks helped her to see herself differently after Daku, to not be afraid of herself anymore, to not be afraid of her dreams anymore. Daku did a bad thing to her, but she didn't have to lose her dreams because of him. She could still set sail with Luffy and explore the world, no matter how dangerous the world could be. She could still listen to all the melodies the world had to offer, write beautiful songs and perform them for everyone, giving hope and joy through her music. She would be able to do it because she was a good singer and was able to see music where others couldn't, not because Daku made her eat the Sing Sing Fruit though the Fruit didn't hurt her natural abilities. She had a new dream now as well. She wanted to sail with Shanks and his crew. She would be on Luffy's crew eventually, but they both agreed that being on Shanks' crew first would be a good start for them as pirates. So, when the opportunity to sail aboard the Red Force came, there was no way Uta could let it pass her by. Stupid Freckleface Ace was going, Uta wouldn't let Shanks leave her and Luffy behind.

It took a lot of convincing, and Makino's help on top of that, but the twins had managed to secure a spot on the ship for the trip. True, they were only going to the other side of the island, but it was still fulfilling Uta's new dream. She was still getting to sail with Luffy, Shanks and the crew. And she guessed it was okay that Ace was there too, even if he was still a jerk. His song was getting softer lately and as much as he annoyed her, Uta didn't like to hear how diminished he was becoming. Ace was meant to be driving bass lines and raucous drumbeats, not somber ballads. She hoped the trip helped him find that passionate part of himself again, dummie or not.

Town Center might as well have been a whole other island because Uta looked around and she didn't see the Dawn she knew. The people moved so quickly, they dressed differently, and they talked differently too. Their heartsongs were all in a faster tempo than the residents of Windmill Village, matching the pace at which they lived their lives. Instead of the comfort of the windmills looming overhead, there was the royal palace. While it was pretty to look at, Uta did not forget her Grandpa's words about nobles and how royals were usually the worst of them. She didn't find anything familiar until the dress shop had decided that she couldn't have any dresses because she was a gamma. Gab had taken her away before she heard everything that was said about her, but she heard enough: demon, cursed, changeling, unwanted. She had heard it all before.

She tried to remember what Shanks told her. It wasn't her fault. Daku did those things to her, not because of her. She was still herself. She was still Monkey D. Luta Uta, dress or no dress.

Still, it hurt to see the scornful looks on the faces of strangers who decided without knowing her that she was the reason for Daku's darkness. It made her remember how she felt listening to his agonized screams and the wild pitch of his song accompanied by Grandpa's mad laughter as Daku's ship burned. Uta hadn't felt bad about it, she had been happy. No good person would feel that way listening to someone burn to death. Something in her was wrong and that was why she was a gamma.

It was harder to believe that after meeting Eudora.

Even being a gamma herself, most of what Uta knew about them came from books and what others said. Gammas were demons and changelings. They were damaged and used goods. They were cursed and destined to be alone for life. They were an enemy of the gods and outcasts with no place in the world.

Betas and omegas, though seen as lower than alphas, had their place in society even if those places mostly weren't fair and made them subservient to alphas. Gammas didn't have that because they weren't meant to exist. Why would society make room to allow demons to live amongst them?

Makino often told her her life would be what she made it. As an omega woman, Makino wasn't meant to be a business owner, of a bar no less. She had been a midwife at first, just like her omega mother, because that was the kind of job that omegas were supposed to have. But Maki was never happy in that role. Uta remembered her heartsong was much sadder and more subdued before she chose to follow a new path. Eventually, Makino took over Party's Bar when the previous owner, her alpha cousin, died. That decision was contested by some of the villagers at first, but eventually everyone accepted it because Makino fought for it and she told Uta that she'd need to do the same for her dreams, especially when it seemed impossible. Most days, it was hard for Uta to envision herself being something beyond what history said she could be even after she knew what she wanted.

Eudora was nothing like the books and the whispers described gammas. She could not imagine anyone thinking she was a demon or hated by the gods. She was beautiful and kind. She was generous and empathetic. Her smile was dazzling, her words were soft and her eyes were warm. Her heartsong reflected all that. It included instruments that Uta rarely heard and even ones she didn't know the name of, likely indigenous to the South Blue. She could identify a marimba, steelpans, an acoustic guitar and other instruments coming together to play a mid-tempo melody that was both comforting, rhythmic and sweet.

Unlike with most people, the music flowing in Eudora's veins seemed more settled. Most people's heartsongs jumped out at Uta, begging to be heard, interpreted and sang so they could join the chorus of the world's song. Eudora's song, in comparison, was content, like it knew it would not be caged, like it didn't need Uta's help to be sung. It suffused itself through Eudora's whole body rather than remaining in a small chamber of her heart like everyone else's. Eudora's song wasn't hidden, it was her and she was it. Uta hadn't seen anything like that before. It made sense to her when Luffy told her that Eudora was a singer. The noblewoman had already given her song a voice so it didn't need Uta to do it. That just made Uta drawn to the woman all the more. There was no way Eudora could be cursed. But if Uta accepted that, didn't that mean she would have to accept it about herself too?

Eudora didn't just become a gamma, something similar to what happened to Uta would have had to happen to her. She didn't understand how though. Eudora was wonderful, but more practically, she was a noble. Nobles were supposed to be the safest people in the world. Grandpa told her all about the things in place to protect them and give them power over everyone else. She couldn't imagine anyone like Daku being able to get to someone like Eudora, who would've been more powerful than everyone in Windmill Village combined before she could even walk. Uta itched to ask her, but she refrained from doing so, knowing how much it bothered her when people brought up what happened to her.

Instead, she basked in the happiness being in Eudora's presence gave her. The noblewoman did not seem to be upset with Uta attaching herself to her and no one else was either, Luffy and Shanks even encouraged her to go look for her once they were settled in the house.

"Eudora says she has some special flowers. Let's go ask to see them," Luffy suggested, pulling Uta by the hand towards the door of their temporary room after they got bored with jumping on the big fluffy bed.

"You want to go see flowers? Ugh, you're such a girl," Ace groused.

"Nuh-uh, they're cool volcano flowers so it's different," Luffy defended.

"Even if they weren't, you better not tease my brother about what he likes again, Freckleface," Uta hissed at the older boy.

"So he's a girl and you're a snake, huh? 'Cause you sure sound like it."

She balled up her fist and almost lunged at the older boy when Shanks' voice came floating towards her from his adjoining room.

"Uta, no hitting people in someone else's house. It's rude, don't you think?"

"Yes, Shanks. Sorry," she apologized, glaring at Ace as he gave her a smug grin.

"It's alright. Go see those flowers. Eudora has a show tonight, she won't have time soon enough. Take Ace with you. You're in charge. Make sure the boys stay out of trouble."

"Sure will, Shanks," Uta agreed, a smug grin now settling on her lips as Ace balked.

"What?! I don't have to listen to her or you!"

"You will if you want those daggers back," Shanks replied.

Ace started huffing while Uta gave him a teasing smile.

"Come on, Freckleface, let's go. No running or shouting and keep your hands to yourself," she ordered primly.

"You're not the boss of me," Ace grumbled but got up anyway and followed behind her and Luffy.

"Am too, Shanks says so," she shot back in a sing-song voice.

"It's okay, Ace. Uta's always in charge of me and I don't mind," Luffy reassured him.

"That's because you'd probably be dead already if someone else wasn't in charge of you."

Uta rolled her eyes but didn't contest the comment because it was true.

They found Eudora in the backyard, tending to a flowerbed filled with purple hibiscuses.

"This must be a really great flower 'cause Shanks likes it too," Luffy commented as they joined the woman.

"Hello there, my young friends. Recognize the flower, do you?"

"Shanks has it on his glass wood bracelet thing."

"His log pose. Yes, I noticed. It's a hibiscus."

"Like Hibiscus Rouge," Ace asked.

"Exactly like Hibiscus Rouge. Not many people know about her."

"Shanks told us all about her. Plus, she's Ace's—ow!" Luffy's excited words were cut off as Ace stomped on his foot.

"Don't hit Luffy!" Uta chastised, smacking him in the back of his head in retaliation.

"Shanks told you not to hit me in someone else's house," Ace shot back, rubbing his head.

"We're not in the house, we're outside," Uta replied, lifting her nose haughtily.

Eudora giggled at them.

"You two remind me of me and my siblings."

"He's not my brother."

"She's not my sister."

Both Uta and Ace replied at once.

"He's just a dummie that my Grandpa adopted."

"She's just a know-it-all that showed up one day to ruin my life."

Eudora shook her head with a fond smile, her violet curls swaying in the breeze with the motion.

"If you say so. But, yes, these flowers are special to me and so is Hibiscus Rouge. You see, we are both from the same island."

"Batteria, right," Luffy asked.

"Close, it's Baterilla in the South Blue."

"Did you… did you ever meet her," Ace asked hesitantly.

Uta spared him a quick glance. His face looked both considering and cautious, like it always was when he broached the topic of his parents with strangers. It was usually his dad he asked about and it was always with a hint of hope that Uta didn't even think he realized was there. He would ask what they thought of the possibility of Gold Roger having a son, hoping that the answer would be different, and it never was. Ace thought of himself as a demon, that he should've never been born because that's what everyone told him. Uta felt angry when she heard him say that and would tell him he was stupid for listening to strangers in the first place. Ace would throw in her face that she thought she was a demon too and she believed what people said about her, so she couldn't tell him he was stupid without her being stupid too. Uta would drop it after that. Why should she care how he felt about himself anyway? They weren't friends.

"As a matter of fact, my family was quite close with her."

"But you're a noble and she was a pirate. How'd that work?"

"Baterilla's nobility is not the same as many islands. Don't get me wrong, they can be quite stuck up and full of themselves, only caring about their profit over people's lives, but a contingent of nobles are considered "new nobles" because they only reached that status recently. Baterilla relies heavily on agriculture and most nobles find their fortune through the crops of the land. The king elevates those with the most land and crops to the status of nobility ever so often. After my grandmother was able to secure a sizable plantation and become the largest producer of sugar cane on the island, one of the most important crops we export, the king elevated us to the status of nobility. Before that, Oba-chan was a crewmember for a trader's ship that Portgas D. Rouge was a cabin girl on. Baba grew fond of her. They were both omegas determined to follow their dreams after all. Before she set sail with the Red and Black Pirates, Rouge visited our house a lot. My Jiji was a shipwright and even helped build her ship, the Anne Bonny."

Uta privately thought that knowing Eudora's family was only recently made nobles helped explain how she could've gotten in a position to become a gamma. Maybe new nobles weren't as protected as old nobles, just like no regular noble was as important as royalty and even royalty wasn't as important as Celestial Dragons, at least not to the people who controlled the World.

"It sounds like you knew Hibiscus Rouge really well," the little singer surmised.

"I was a kid at that time, but I admired her. She inspired me. The people of Baterilla value ambition and tenacity, so most of the villagers and quite a few new nobles were proud of her for going out there and defying the World by making her own path."

"She sounds like she was a really cool person," Ace commented wistfully.

"She was," Eudora agreed, a nostalgic smile on her face.

"The person who killed her must be a monster then."

Eudora's eyes cleared and she gave Ace a searching look before a sad smile crossed her lips.

"It's much more complicated than that I'm afraid. It wasn't a person that killed her, it was the World."

"The world," Luffy asked with confusion, looking at the ground suspiciously.

"Not literally, but the World Government are the ones who put Rouge in the situation that killed her. They're the ones who hunted her for something that could never be a crime. She would be alive if they hadn't told their lies and spun the truth to be what they wanted it to be."

Ace seemed to be taking it in, struggling to process the words.

"What's the thing? The thing that should never be a crime," Luffy asked curiously.

"Love. She loved her family, her pack, and wanted to protect them. For that, they hunted her down. Even that didn't stop her. Her last days on this world were used turning that immense love into one of the most amazing feats I've ever witnessed. The World has erased her name and her history but Baterilla, scarred and bled as it has been, is still proud of her to this day and so am I."

Uta gave Ace a furtive glance. His hands were clenched into fists and he was biting his lips while his cheeks had a hint of red to them. She didn't know what he was thinking but she was certain it was nothing good. Luffy opened his mouth to speak but Uta cut him off, changing the subject before it caused Ace to blow his top.

"We actually came out here to ask if we could see your volcano flowers before we all have to get ready for the show."

Eudora's gaze lingered on Ace a moment before they switched to Uta.

"Of course, I did promise Luffy he could see them, but you all have to follow my instructions to the letter. They're not in bloom yet, so they are still delicate to handle."

Uta and Luffy nodded and began following after Eudora, though Uta had to grab Ace's arm to make him follow them. She decided to listen to him, really listen, not just with her ears but with her mind and her heart. His heartsong was now a mournful and angry thing, beating against the walls of his chest ragefully, every chord strumming with self-recrimination.

"Are— are you okay," she whispered to him.

He shot her a glare in return.

"Mind your own business."

"Fine, forget I asked," she replied, rolling her eyes as she stopped listening to him, his song cutting off with a weeping violin echoing in her mind.

Eudora stopped them outside the greenhouse and gave each of them a pair of thick gloves.

"It'll be hot in there. Don't touch anything unless I say and don't take these gloves off. Their temperatures are quite high before they're in bloom, but they will still be wondrous to look at."

Once she was sure all three children were in compliance, she opened the door to the stone greenhouse. Uta was surprised to see that the room was lit up in several different colors and the light source was the flowers themselves. They were sectioned by color, all the plants sitting in flower beds made of brick. Curiously, rather than soil, the flowers were growing out of what appeared to be ground magma with red hot lava just visible amongst the blackened gravel. The flowers were jutting out of the rocks with glowing stems and flower petals in shades of purple, red, blue, green, white, pink and orange. Each flower had bulbs coming out of the middle which were dripping fluorescent liquid the same color as the glowing flowers.

"Whoa, that so weird but so cool," Luffy gushed, running up to the box of red flowers but somehow refraining from touching them, perhaps because the flowers were whispering angrily and making their displeasure known to the world.

"What's dripping from them," Uta asked, examining the purple flowers with interest. Their whispers were the least hostile but Uta still couldn't quite make out what they were saying.

"Nectar. When they are in full bloom, their temperature decreases drastically and the nectar cools down. Hummingbirds eat the nectar and it's also harvested. Would you like to touch them?"

"Oh, please, please, please, please, please," Luffy started begging, prompting Eudora to laugh.

"Okay, let's find one close to bloom. If they are too young, they don't like to be touched. They may melt or even explode. They're prima donnas that way."

"I thought they were magma flowers," Luffy returned confused.

"It's an expression, Lu," Uta explained, but her eyes strayed over to Ace who was weirdly quiet.

He was near the orange flowers at the far end of the greenhouse. He wasn't touching them, but he didn't appear to be looking at them either. Uta's attention went back to Eudora as she brought her and Luffy to a flower she deemed safe for them to touch, while still wearing their gloves to protect their hands from being burned.

This flower's voice was clearer than its compatriots, perhaps because it was more mature. It was grumpy and sounded sad… no, not just sad, something deeper, something even more melancholic. It wasn't a new emotion. She had felt it lingering in some of the Red Hair Pirates' heartsongs, in Shanks' heartsong, in Yasopp's and Grandpa's. She didn't know what it was, couldn't put a name to it.

She strained her ears to pick out what the flower was saying, biting her tongue so she didn't ask it questions in front of Eudora.

Wrong… not where I belong… the ground is wrong… the room is wrong… home, I miss home.

Homesick. That was what it was, the feeling was homesickness. Uta had felt that way before, but it wasn't a place she was missing, rather it was a person. She felt sorry for the flowers. No wonder they were so angry, they lost their home and now they had to figure out how to survive in a strange place with only a strange woman to rely on.

Her eyes strayed back to Ace, still standing unnaturally quiet amongst the angry flowers. She couldn't help but think that Ace and the magma flowers had a lot in common.

"You know, Uta. These flowers are very picky. I've found that while they don't like being touched, they do love to hear singing. Perhaps you can dazzle them with a song."

Uta lit up at that.

"Really?"

"Why not? Luffy has told me stories of your voice. I'm eager to hear it myself and the flowers will appreciate it too."

"Uta's a great singer, they'll love it," Luffy assured confidently.

"I guess I can come up with something for them."

Uta closed her eyes and took a deep breath, taking in the whispers of the flowers and let the words come to her.

I recall that day we played together by the sea
Just you and me
Still that scent of ocean seems to fade each passing day
It slips away

So I sing an old familiar song
I hope you know the one
I will sing to call you back to me

I need you to hear it
Need you to believe in
Something out there beyond the open sea
Out in the starlight
I need you to hear it
Need you to believe it
There's a wind stirring my wings
That is always beckoning
Calling me above into the open sky

Uta stopped singing as the angry whispering slowly dimmed but that was not what gave her pause. She opened her eyes when she heard sniffling coming from beside her. She turned to look at Luffy who had his head down, a tear slipping down his cheek.

"Oh no, Lu is sad. I'm sorry, Lu. I don't know why I sang that song, it just… it just came to me," she apologized, leaning over to hug her twin as she felt a swell of guilt.

"It's okay. I like the song, Uta. I love all your songs. That one just makes me remember when I missed you," he assured her, hugging her tighter.

"I missed you too. That's why I made the song."

"Oh, I didn't mean to upset you two," Eudora commented regretfully.

"S'okay. Uta made that song for me when the bad man had her."

Uta stiffened just a little before remembering that Eudora wouldn't judge her.

"Singing made me feel a little better before Grandpa came for me. He didn't make me stop even after he gave me the Sing Sing Fruit."

"Holding on to the things that make you you is an important thing to do in order to survive. It helps make sure those things are preserved when you get to the other side of all that bad. It was very smart of you to do, Uta," Eudora responded.

Uta felt her cheeks warming up a bit at her compliment.

"Hey Eudora, do these flowers make fruit," Ace asked, speaking up for the first time in minutes.

"No, these are much too small for that."

"So, what's this?"

Uta and Luffy looked over as Ace held up a small fruit in his hand. It was round and orange, its skin covered with swirls and a pattern that resembled flames. It was silent to Uta, she couldn't hear anything it said. That was slightly strange. She had been able to hear the Sing Sing Fruit loud and clear. It had called out to her, enticed her to eat it, to let it help her give a voice to the songs of the world. Daku had said it chose her so she might as well eat it. Besides, it would make her useful to him. Either way, silent or not, she knew she didn't want it to be in Ace's possession.

"Put it down, Freckleface. It's a Devil Fruit," Uta ordered him. She didn't know why there was a Devil Fruit in here, but Ace was the last person who needed one.

"She is quite right and it was locked away for a reason," Eudora said, hurrying over to take the Fruit from Ace.

She bent down, lifted up a chest with a strange crest on it and placed it inside before closing the chest up.

"Thought you already had a Fruit, why do you need another one," he asked, crossing his arms.

"It's not for me. Eating two Devil Fruits is a death sentence. This Fruit is for very important business I need to attend to. Akuma no Mi are not to be trifled with, children. You must remember they aren't toys. They can be very dangerous."

"You have one, Prissy Princess does, even the freak clown does. Must not be that important."

"Oh, but they are. Many people seek them out because they are rare, which means they are quite willing to hurt others to acquire them. You must do your utmost to stay clear of them and do not eat one without understanding what it means."

"If you say so," Ace mumbled.

"She doesn't have to explain herself to you in the first place, jerk. I already told you not to touch anything."

"I already told you you're not the boss of me."

"I am if you want your precious daggers back. Shanks said—"

"Yeah, yeah. You and your precious Shanks."

Ace glared at her before storming off. Uta rolled her eyes in response.

Drama queen.

"I'm sorry about him, he's always like that," she apologized to the older woman, feeling embarrassed at Ace's behavior.

"I'm sure he has his reasons," Eudora responded before she placed the chest on a high shelf.

"I don't know about you two, but I'm getting hot in here. How about we look at some dresses for the show tonight?"

Uta smiled at that and nodded happily.

"Ooh Uta, we should wear matching outfits," Luffy suggested excitedly.

"Fine, but I'm picking what you wear."

Uta had never seen as much clothes as was in Eudora's closet. She had several outfits for children and tons of dresses for Uta to pick from, but she now had the added work of finding one that Luffy could wear matching clothes with and it had to be clothes he could wear sandals with because he wouldn't change his shoes no matter how much Uta tried to convince him otherwise.

Luffy was currently inside the walk-in closet looking for shorts that he could wear with the striped shirt Uta picked for him. The two gammas sat on an ottoman at the end of Eudora's large bed, going through the selection of ribbons the older woman presented Uta with to see which color she wanted for her hair. Eudora was weighing her options between the white and red one when Uta plucked up the courage to ask the question she'd been holding in all day.

"Eudora?"

"Yes, sweetheart?"

"Are we bad?"

Eudora looked up immediately from the ribbons she held.

"What?"

"Gammas, are we… are we cursed? Are we bad?"

Eudora sighed in response before she put the ribbons down and gave Uta her full attention.

"Do you think you're bad?"

"Sometimes," she admitted.

"May I ask why?"

"People become gammas because their souls are wrong. That's what the books say anyway."

The winds said differently but they didn't understand much about how people worked. Most of their stories about gammas were secondhand retellings from the seas whose Voice Uta could no longer hear, so she had had to rely on what people said about her distinction more than what nature said.

"Maybe the books do say that, but we know better, don't we? Our souls had no bearing on the actions of the people who hurt us."

"Shanks says that this happened to me, not because of me. He says that I'm not the bad one, Daku is."

"You don't believe him?"

"Daku was bad, I know that. He killed people in my village and he hurt Luffy."

"He was bad for doing those things. He was also bad for what he did to you, don't forget that."

"But I let him take me."

"How so?"

"I trusted him, I listened to him even when Luffy said there was something wrong with him."

"You're a child and a grown man betrayed your trust for selfish reasons. That doesn't mean you did something to deserve it."

"I let him trick me. Daku said that he would take me from Dawn so that I could sing for the world, like I always wanted. I only realized something was wrong when he told me to keep it a secret from Luffy. By then, it was too late. He killed villagers who tried to keep him from taking me and he hurt Luffy when he tried to stop him too. The only reason he didn't kill my brother is because I agreed to go with him. How is that not my fault?"

"He took advantage of you. He turned your dreams against you. All the actions taken here were done by him, not you. He set it all in motion, so it can't be your fault."

"I did do a bad thing that he didn't make me do."

Eudora gave her an openly curious look, not pushing for an answer but open to receive one.

"When my grandpa came to rescue me, I knew that he was going to hurt Daku but I didn't know how bad it was going to be. The Marines were supposed to arrest him and take him to be executed, I heard some of Grandpa's crew talking about it, but Grandpa got so mad when he saw that I had been bitten. He dragged Daku away and he killed him… horribly. I didn't see it but I could hear all of it. He beat him and cut him, he shot him and broke things. It took hours. He screamed the whole time. Then when Grandpa was done, he burned Daku alive with his ship," Uta explained, the screams and laughing, the burning and pleas, the desperation evident in Daku's voice and his song, all of it still echoed in her ears.

"And I… I was happy. It felt good that he died. I was glad he was hurt," she admitted shamefully, a tear slipping down her face.

I was glad his song was over, she thought but didn't say.

"A good person wouldn't feel that way, so I can't be good. Maybe people are wrong about gammas' souls being rotten. Your soul isn't. You're good, I can feel it and see it, but there's still something wrong with me."

"Oh Uta, come here sweetheart," Eudora beckoned to her, inviting her to tuck herself beneath the woman's arm and press her head to her chest.

"Do you know what feeling happy in that moment makes you?"

"A monster?"

"No, not at all. It makes you human. Someone that you trusted hurt you in an unfathomable way. He betrayed you, laid claim to you when he had no right and tried to turn you into a possession. Being happy at his demise does not make you a monster. It's only logical that you would be glad that someone who caused you so much pain would no longer be able to hurt you, the people you love or anyone else ever again."

"But the way he died was awful."

"He led an awful life. He was an alpha, born with the opportunities that other second genders have to fight tooth and nail to receive all because he had the luck to be born with a certain set of hormones. He used the freedom man's laws gave him to subjugate and steal freedom from others. No person who stoops so low deserves to draw breath. He used his awful life to do awful things and those actions brought him to an awful death. None of that is on you. You don't owe him your sympathy simply because he suffered in his last moments. I'd be willing to bet that while you laid on your deathbed from a bite he inflicted on you, your very life hanging in the balance as your body struggled to overcome his cruelty, that he spared you no thought beyond whether he would be able to continue victimizing you."

Uta bit her lip at that. After Daku bit her, she got sick almost immediately. It had been the worst experience of her life. She had thought everything else he did was awful, and it was, but it was different to have the new threat to her life be coming from within. That was the second time she had almost died, the first being when she was just a baby. She didn't remember that but both she and Luffy had become horribly ill after their birth. They spent a whole month sick, small and pale and weak. Grandpa had been sure they would die but somehow, they had pulled through. Luffy always said it was because they were strong. She tried to hold onto that during her second illness, but it was hard to do so when her body was shutting down. Her whole being had ached in places she didn't know existed. She spasmed and shook, her nerve endings feeling like they were on fire. She could barely move while she roasted in a fever and yet was freezing cold. She was exhausted but couldn't sleep beyond periodically fainting. A part of her had wanted to die just so her suffering could end, but she couldn't imagine leaving Luffy behind to face the world alone, and the world had so many more songs for Uta to discover, so she fought. All the while, Daku spoke to her. He threatened to go back to Dawn and take Luffy if she didn't survive. He told her she was weak and worthless and that he'd throw her body in the sea to never be found if she did die, like he had done to the other kids. Uta had wanted to prove him wrong as much as she had wanted to survive for Luffy.

"I know my words sound harsh, but I also know that that experience has stolen any child-like wonder you may have with the world. You see it as it is, in all its beauty and horror. You are not one of the monsters who have made it horrible, not now. What you do with your future is up to you, not anyone else. If you continue to believe yourself a monster, you will make one of yourself. You need to see yourself for what you truly are. Daku was the monster. He did something that could've killed you, but you survived it. Do you know why?"

"Why?"

"Because you're strong. You being a gamma just proves it."

Uta furrowed her brows at that.

"So many children are taken and have a bite forced on them like what happened to us, much more than we're told about, but most don't survive. It isn't their fault, but their bodies are unable to adapt. We were lucky, ours did something miraculous. It became the rarest thing it could to save our lives. In our darkest hours, languishing at death's door from a bite that we didn't ask for, our bodies exhibited resilience that still can't be fully explained. It's so astonishing that the World Government has deemed it an offense simply because they fear the power we possess from having defied the laws of nature itself. That strength is nothing to be ashamed of. How can we be monsters or cursed when we have the will to do something like that?"

Uta blinked. She had never seen it that way before.

"I'm proud of what I am because it shows who I am: a survivor who is determined to live free. That's what being a gamma says about you too. The world doesn't understand that, but then again, they don't understand what we survived either. And they don't need to, you don't have to explain anything you don't want to. You're not obligated to make them understand any more than you're obligated to feel guilt for how this Daku died. You transformed into something new so that you could have a chance to live your dreams, a chance at real freedom. Don't let the world take that from you. It'll take everything if it's allowed to, but you don't ever back down. You have to show it just how strong you are. And you are strong, Uta. You're one of the strongest little girls I've ever met."

"Me?"

"Oh yes. Other gammas who survive often struggle to find a voice after facing what we have, but you still have yours. What's more, you still want to share it with the world. That is strength. You hold onto that for me, never let anyone tell you what you can or can't do. Never let anyone else tell you who you are, you have to believe it yourself or it'll mean nothing. Can you do that?"

Uta nodded her head, her eyes glistening with unshed tears. Eudora gave her a smile before pulling Uta closer, resting her head atop the smaller girl's, her violet curls falling over Uta's face. Gammas didn't have scent glands, but they could still produce their own unique scent, though it wasn't as strong as any other distinction's and their gamma signature often overpowered their unique scents but this close, Uta could identify mango, pineapple, chocolate, hibiscus and rose mingling with Eudora's gamma signature. It was a comforting smell and she relaxed even more into the woman's arms. She spent about a minute enjoying the warm embrace before Luffy popped out of the closet.

"Uta, I found it!"

She wiped her cheeks before she ducked out from under Eudora's hair only for her face to turn up in horror.

"Lu, you cannot wear rainbow shorts with a striped shirt!"

"Why not? These shorts look awesome. Do you like them, Eudora?"

"They certainly match your spirit, Luffy," the older woman replied magnanimously with an amused smile.

"See? Eudora loves it."

"She's being nice. This is exactly why I pick the clothes on matching days. Come on, we're finding something different."

"Aww, but Uta…" Luffy whined.

"No buts. Let's go," she ordered and marched him back inside the closet with Eudora's laughter tinkling behind her.

The rest of the night went well. Uta enjoyed her time at the circus and swimming with Shanks as well as lying in bed, resting against his chest while he read her and Luffy a bedtime story. She wondered if this was the kind of thing that fathers did. She wasn't an expert. She had never had parents. All she knew was what Makino had told her and what she had observed in the village. All the kids were older than her and Luffy, but not by much, and all of them had at least one parent. She noticed that parents held kids' hands or let them ride on their shoulders. They bought them things in the marketplace that they wanted not just things they needed. They scolded them when they were naughty but they also worried over them when they were hurt. They said things like, 'I love you'.

Shanks does most of that, Uta thought to herself before she pushed the thought away.

She didn't want to think about things like that. It made a heavy feeling settle in her chest and crazy, impossible thoughts pop up in her head. It was better to not think about things like that.

Sleep was coming fast, settling over her mind, making her thoughts sluggish.

I wonder what Shanks would say if I told him I loved him, she thought before she drifted off to sleep.

She wasn't sure how long she was sleeping before she woke up again. She was confused for a moment, blinking blearily around the dark room and wondering what woke her up. She could hear Luffy behind her, snoring away and still fast asleep with an arm thrown over Uta. She had learned how to sleep through his snoring a long time ago, so she didn't think that was what woke her up. She shrugged and settled back down, intent on falling back asleep when she heard a whispering voice.

"I know what the plan was, I helped you make it, remember," Ace hissed.

Of course it was Freckleface. Uta rolled her eyes and was about to tell him to shut up when another voice spoke up.

"If you remember the plan, then why are you changing it now?"

Sabo? What's he doing here, Uta thought, scrunching her eyebrows.

"I… I just can't wait anymore, alright?"

"Um, no, not alright. We've been saving for months now so we can eventually get our own ship. Our treasure is the most important thing and lately it feels like you don't feel the same way. Our plan is simple but it works because we're careful. Now you want to go running to the Bluejam Pirates to see if they can give us a ship."

"Not give us one, sell us one."

"We don't have enough money for them to sell us a ship and dealing with them is too risky. We can pinch everything in this house and Bluejam will probably tell us it's not enough. He's not a trustworthy guy. We're not ready to deal with someone like him yet."

"We don't need to have enough money, we can trade them for a ship."

"What could we trade them that would be valuable enough to give us a ship in return?"

"What about a rare fruit that can give a person powers? Even Bluejam will want something like that."

"Huh? What the heck are you talking about?"

"The richy-rich lady that owns this place had a Devil Fruit laying around."

"A what-fruit? That name doesn't exactly sound great."

"It's fine. Look, here it is. I took it from the greenhouse. All of the pirates here are drinking so it wasn't even hard."

Uta stiffened at that. Ace had stolen Eudora's Fruit? That jerk!

"That's it? Looks weird but other than that, it doesn't look like much."

"Maybe not, but something like this is what gave Uta her singing powers and the freaky clown his Chop Chop abilities."

"It must cost a fortune then."

"It doesn't need to cost a fortune, just enough to get us a ship."

"You're sure that's what you want still?"

"What do you mean? That was always the plan."

"I know, it's just… you've been different lately."

"The hell is that supposed to mean?"

"Ever since you met the pirate that you said knows your parents, you've been… quieter, but also angrier. I don't get what's going on with you."

"You don't need to get it. We've got a plan and we're sticking to it. Are you in this with me or not, Sabo?"

It was quiet for a moment but apparently Sabo agreed.

"Good, let me get my pipe and we'll go. I was able to get some of my new daggers too, so let's get out of here while the jackasses are busy drinking."

Uta listened to the boys shuffling around for a moment before she heard them climb out the window. She sat up, watching their shadows moving within the mango tree outside the window. She was frozen for a split second before she bolted out of bed and shook Luffy awake in the process.

"Huh? Wha…? Uta? What's wrong?"

"It's Ace. He stole Eudora's Devil Fruit," she explained, quickly rummaging through their drawers for suitable clothes.

"Eh? But why?"

"He wants to give it to a pirate so him and his friend can get a ship."

"There are other pirates here," Luffy asked, perking up at the mention.

"Lu, that's not what's important! Ace can't just steal from Eudora."

"She is nice and she gave us a really big dinner and she made you feel better. Ace shouldn't take her things," Luffy reasoned.

"What are we going to do," he asked, getting out of bed as he rubbed his eyes.

"We're going after him and Sabo."

"Sabo?"

"His friend."

"Oh, okay. Should we tell Shanks?"

Uta paused at that. She could go get Shanks and the others but Ace said they were drinking. Plus, well… she didn't want Ace to get in trouble. He had stolen from Eudora and apparently got his daggers back without permission. It wasn't nice things to do but he was just being stupid. Ace wasn't bad. He wasn't a monster. She didn't think the crew would think so, but Ace might think so even more if he gets in trouble with them and Uta didn't want that.

"No, we'll follow Ace and Sabo. We'll see what they're up to, get the Devil Fruit back and make Ace come back to the house. We'll put the Fruit back and then Shanks will never have to know anything happened. Besides, Shanks said I'm in charge and I'm supposed to keep you boys out of trouble, so that's what I'm doing."

Luffy shrugged after a moment.

"Okay," he replied, not questioning her logic.

It was more for her benefit than it had been for Luffy's anyway.

They dressed quickly and then went to the window. Uta looked out and spied two forms in the backyard skulking across towards the gate.

"Come on, let's go so we can catch up."

"Uta, we're going on a real-life adventure. This is so cool," Luffy exclaimed as they climbed out of the window towards the mango tree.

"We are going on an adventure, aren't we? Our very own quest. We've got to be strong to complete it."

"Don't worry, we're super strong."

Before her talk with Eudora and before the sea gave her Shanks, Uta would have doubted that statement. Not the Luffy part of it. She had never doubted Luffy's strength a moment in her life. How could she? Even she knew that he was a rare person: someone who was singularly interested in maintaining his own freedom and going about life in his own way but never let that piratical selfishness stop him from being good. Luffy was bright, he was like the sun and Uta didn't doubt him anymore than she doubted that the sun would rise in the morning. When it came to herself, that was another story entirely. Luffy was adamant that she was strong, that he was only as strong as he was because he had her, but Uta had never been so sure. Her life before Daku felt like a distant dream and she couldn't remember how she thought of herself before him, how she felt about herself. It felt like she had always doubted her own capabilities, her worthiness, her goodness. At times she would wonder how it was that she was Luffy's twin when he was a bright star and she was a pale moon by comparison. But in this moment, she didn't feel that way. Now, that she knew what it meant to be good and what it meant to be a gamma from Eudora, now that she knew what it felt like to be seen, wanted and known by someone outside of Luffy thanks to Shanks, who still thought of her as worthy and important despite everything, she could believe that she deserved to be at Luffy's side. She deserved to be his twin, she deserved to think that she was just as strong as him. They could go on adventures together and one day they would be a crew. Not just family but nakama as well. So, they would go on this adventure, the first of many adventures that great warriors of the sea were meant to have just like Yasopp told them. They would be what Shanks inspired them to be. They would be pirates, just like they always wanted. And pirates were meant to protect their treasure. The Devil Fruit was Eudora's treasure and she had given Uta something that could not be replicated or replaced, she had come into her life and simply by existing, she had given Uta hope. Uta owed it to her to help get her treasure back. Besides, Shanks said pirates had allies all the time and Eudora was basically a part of the Buggy Pirates, so this was just like Uta and Luffy helping out an ally.

"You're right, Lu. We are strong."

Luffy looked at her searchingly for a moment, his eyes not wavering from her. It wasn't an instance of twinspeak, as Shanks had started calling it, though others might confuse it as such. Not many people noticed Luffy's ability to stare deeply into someone's soul any more than they realized Uta's ability to hear the songs of their heart. After Daku, she found it difficult to trust the music she heard. His heartsong had not deterred her from falling into his trap. Luffy never questioned his estimation of people and Uta trusted his judgement even more than she trusted her own. Besides, she never minded it when Luffy looked into her. Even when she was sure he would finally see the darkness in her, he would always smile at her like she was good. After a moment, he grinned brightly.

"Uta's made me so happy," he declared, giggling a little.

"What did I do?"

"You believe in yourself again. I would've kept believing in you enough for both of us, but I was getting worried that you would never find your belief again."

Uta blinked a little at that before smiling sadly at her brother.

"I might forget again that I have belief in myself, that I'm strong and good, but you'll help me, won't you?"

"Shishishi, silly Uta. Of course I will."

Uta nodded in return with a smile and then took a deep breath as the two easily climbed down the tree. They had scaled much steeper and more dangerous things than this, so the first step of their adventure was easy.

They ran across the yard, avoiding a raccoon that startled and then hissed when it saw them coming. They reached the back gate and poked their heads out, observing what was beyond. It was late, so there weren't many people walking the streets but it wasn't empty either.

For a moment Uta couldn't tell where the boys went until she saw the shadow of their pipes stretch across a wall as they turned the corner.

She threw one last look at the backyard. The house's lights were still on and if Uta strained her hearing, she could make out the laughter of the drunk pirates inside as well as music and singing. If Shanks found out they left the house without him, he'd be furious. They would be grounded for the rest of their lives. But Sabo said the Bluejam pirates were dangerous, she couldn't just let Ace get himself into trouble.

The crew would likely be at their drunken revelry for a few hours more and wouldn't even notice they were gone. Uta took a fortifying breath, steeling herself for the upcoming adventure before she grabbed Luffy's hand and walked beyond the gate.

AN: Comments are welcome. I have no idea when the next chapter will be posted but I know it will also be from Uta's perspective.