The Cabinet of curiosities

by Apprentice Tom

A collection of short stuff! Cutting room floor: Scenes that did not make it into longer stories. Omakes to published Fan Fiction and Cannon scenes. Harry and Others who act differently from Cannon. Incubators: Ideas that may or may not be fleshed out into full stories in the future and finally very short one shots. I'm rating this M.

15. Chapter 15 Ask Xeno about Spiderman

This week's Dear Xeno is inspired by an idea provided by Slytherinsal #2617304. A prolific author. Please check out Sal's writing on this site.

Dear Xeno,

My teenaged son spends hours in the bathroom, and I was wondering if he was spending time looking at PlayWizard and indulging in vigorous wand polishing. So when he was out, I investigated, and I found a loose floorboard. Imagine my horror when I found magazines - muggle magazines, about someone called 'Spiderman.' Now being able to call one's son on an excess of right hand exercise is one thing, but this... is my son about to try to have a liaison with one of the acromantulas in the Forbidden Forest?

Worried, from Worcester.

Dear Worried:

There is every reason for you to be worried. But not about your son cavorting with Arachnids. No, your son is careening down the road of subversive muggle entertainment. What he, and now you have discovered is something the muggles call 'Comic Books'. They are neither books or comical for the most part. Some folks will argue that they are a mirror on society. Perhaps giving the reader a glimpse of what society has become. Often, they take a hard look at subjects that most find squeamish. Abuse, Addiction, Dabbling in Dark Arts, ritualistic sacrifice. Some may even cite benefits of reading them, raise awareness, etc.

But I think they dabble too far into the 'DARK' arts. Fanciful creations born of dark ritual magics transforming people into gross creatures like Captain America, Superman, Ironman, Batman and Robin, The Hulk, Aquaman, and Green Lantern with abilities even beyond Wizards! They are opposed by even more fanciful evil creatures and super villains like the Joker, Riddler, Lex Luther, Professor Zoom, and Dark Seid. These portray the eternal good vs evil, light verses dark conflicts.

Now if you found your son reading Wonder Women, Bat Girl, Cat Women, Cheetah and Josie and the Pussy Cats, (Especially Josie and the Pussy Cats as they cavort around a stage with very brief costumes singing subversive music like sirens leading youth to depredation), then I'd think you'd have to have a chat with him about his wand!

Just take a peek at the skintight minimal clothing they wear. All of them wearing cat suits. Sexy suggestive cat suits. Why Bat Girl should be called Cat Girl for the outfit she wears.

I know some out there will say: "At least he's reading something!" But just think where this will lead. I shiver to think of a ritual circle, carved rune sets, a bubbling cauldron of potion and the night of a solstice when a young witch or wizard is holding a comic book and bottle of Ogden's finest in one hand and a wand in another!