Disclaimers: Naruto isn't mine. This is purely a fanfic using someone else's characters.

Warnings: This story includes strong language, violence, angst, references to suicide/ suicide attempts, & referenced/ depicted child abuse.

For Whom the Bell Tolls

Chapter 5: Struck a Chord

"Thinking of you is a poison I drink often."

-Atticus

- - -

Naruto decided to pretend the whole incident in his room never happened. It was just easier that way. Besides, it wasn't like Sasuke meant to do anything to him. He thought he was someone else. It wasn't like he wanted to.. kiss him.

Right?

No. He must have misread the situation. I mean.. they're both guys. Acknowledging that someone had an appealing face is one thing, but that doesn't mean.. for all Naruto knew he might remind Sasuke of a girl. Maybe that's why he acted that way.

He was confused, but he knew one thing for sure. It wasn't him Sasuke was seeing..

It wasn't him.

- - -

"Are you coming over today? I think I can convince Iruka to make ramen."

Naruto and Sasuke sat at a small table in the corner of the library, pretending to work on their essays while attempting to carry on a conversation. They switched to passing notes for a while when the librarian gave them a stern lecture about library etiquette but went back to chatting once she finally left. Naruto was determined to get Sasuke to hang out with him- he wasn't going to let the school librarian get in his way.

"And why would that make me want to come over?" Sasuke asked, his voice flat, his mind distracted.

"Because I love ramen."

Sasuke gave the excitable blonde a blatant look. "Again- why would that make me want to come over?"

Naruto tilted his head and gave a small smile. "Because you like seeing me happy."

Something heavy and pained passed through Sasuke's eyes, but he blinked it away before Naruto could get a good look. His grin slipped. "Are you ok?"

Sasuke turned away from him, then suddenly got to his feet. His fingers trembled, and he forced them into tight fists.

Naruto reached out and gently touched his hand, but Sasuke tore away from him. "Sasuke..?"

Without a word, he grabbed his things and left. Naruto stared after his retreating form, trying to decide if he should chase after him or leave him alone. He wanted to follow, but he had a feeling his was the last face Sasuke wanted to see right now.

- - -

The dismissal bell rang, and Naruto decided that he had given Sasuke more than enough alone time.

Time to find the moody bastard.

This wasn't his first time dealing with the raven's sudden mood swings. They've been friends for a few weeks now and he was finding that being the Uchiha's friend wasn't such an easy task. Sometimes it felt next to impossible. But he was determined to keep him by his side. They still had yet to share their baggage with each other, but Naruto knew it was just a matter of time. When they did, he would finally, fully understand Sasuke. And he hoped that Sasuke might come to understand him too.

Until then, he just had to stick it out and stay persistent. He wouldn't let his only real friend in Konoha slip away.

He tossed his things in his locker and raced through the halls, keeping his eyes peeled for long ebony hair and the teme's forlorn face. He pushed through the crowd by the front door and finally spotted him over by the front gate.

"Sasuke! Hey, Sasuke!"

The Uchiha sighed, but otherwise ignored the blonde. He needed a break. From his smile, those eyes, his face.. even his mannerisms were too fucking close for comfort. He didn't trust himself. He didn't know if he could keep them separate in his mind, but he needed to. Because he needed to figure out if the feelings he was starting to have towards Naruto were actually for Naruto, or if they were for him. He didn't want to use Naruto as a replacement, but he didn't want to ignore his feelings either.

He needed to figure it out, and he couldn't do that with that fucking face in front of him all of the time.

"Sasuke, wait up!"

He could hear him approaching, could feel his patience slipping. Naruto grabbed his arm to stop him, and that thin thread keeping him together snapped. Sasuke spun around and shoved him, hard. Naruto stumbled back and fell to the ground.

"Nnnn.." he groaned, pushing up from his elbows. He looked up at the irate raven and narrowed his eyes. "What the hell was that for?"

"Take a fucking hint, Naruto. I don't want you around me right now."

"Well that's too fucking bad!" Naruto shouted, rising to his feet. "Not everything is about you, Sasuke!"

Sasuke growled and grabbed him by the collar of his shirt, yanking him close. "I can't be around you right now. So- Back. Off."

Naruto grabbed his wrists, keeping him close. "Will you just talk to me?! Let me help you!"

"Pshh. Right. You can't even help yourself."

Naruto's grip on his wrists tightened. "You don't know anything, Sasuke."

"That's right. I don't. And neither do you. So don't pretend like you can do shit for me, because you can't." He ripped his wrists free and shoved Naruto back a step. "Do us both a favor and leave me alone."

Naruto watched him leave, again. And once again, he was left with a choice- he could let him leave and ignore him for some indeterminate amount of time, or he could go after him. It could blow up in his face, he could make matters worse and Sasuke could wind up shutting him out for a lot longer, but there was still a chance that he would talk to him.

Maybe it should start with me, he thought. Maybe if I tell him something personal, he'll finally open up.

What did he have to lose?

Naruto waited until Sasuke was nearly out of sight before following after him. He sent Iruka a quick text letting him know he'd be spending some time at Sasuke's, then turned his focus back to the raven, careful to stay far enough away that he wouldn't know he was being followed.

I'll make it impossible for that bastard to ignore me.

Not a lot he can do when I show up at his house. Naruto smirked to himself.

Pretty obvious you don't know me as well as you think you do, Sasuke. Because if you did, you would have seen this coming.

- - -

It didn't take long for Sasuke to reach his house. They made their way down a few blocks, through a neighborhood, and across a small road. A large dark home sat nestled between a set of cherry blossom trees. A tall wooden fence kept the backyard enclosed and hidden from the rest of the street, but the front of the house was open and welcoming. An assortment of shrubbery lined the walkway to a small landing with a large red door.

He slowly crept forward as Sasuke unlocked the door and stepped inside. Naruto stared after at him, wondering what he should do next.

I could just try the door and see if it's locked, but if it is that's really weird. I guess I could just knock on the door, but what if he just slams it in my face. Then I'm back where I started.

"Fuck.. how do I get in?"

"The front door usually works best for me."

Naruto shrieked and spun around to find one of his teachers grinning down at him.

"Wha-what?! Kakashi-sensei, what are you doing here?!"

"I could ask you the same question, Naruto. Mind explaining why you've decided to come to my home and grace me with your presence?"

Naruto's eyes widened. "Wait- your home? But.. doesn't Sasuke live here?"

"Ahhh- now I understand. Yes, Sasuke lives here."

Naruto stared at him, his mind still struggling to catch up. "I'm so confused."

Kakashi laughed and patted him on the shoulder. "That does not surprise me, Naruto."

"Hey!"

"Why don't you come in. I'm sure Sasuke would just love to explain it to you."

Naruto quirked an eyebrow at his teacher but followed the man inside. It was what he was trying to do after all. It was a stroke of luck that someone was willing to just let him inside.

Kakashi unlocked the door and held it open, and Naruto eagerly stepped over the threshold. He slipped out of his shoes and looked around as Kakashi dropped his things to the side. Naruto took suit and deposited his backpack next to the door before stepping further into the house. He wandered into a room off to the side that had a massive couch, tons of greenery perched on shelves and standing in the corners, and wall to wall bookshelves. Knowing it was a teacher's home, he assumed it was a collection of dull academic books, but it turned out to be the complete opposite. Apparently, Kakashi-sensei had a love for dirty romance novels.

That.. is surprising.

"Sasuke! I have a surprise for you! Why don't you come down for a sec?"

Naruto bit his lip, suddenly feeling a bit nervous. This might have been a bad idea.

He could hear footsteps coming down the stairs. Guess it's too late to change it now.

"What did you need, Kakashi?"

"Well, and hello to you too."

"Just tell me so I can go back to my room."

Naruto strained his ears, listening carefully to their conversation. By the sound of it, Sasuke was still in a bad mood and his relationship with Kakashi-sensei was pretty casual. He was surprised but they didn't have his class together, so for all he knew he was like this at school too.

Doubt it, though. Kakashi-sensei is pretty chill, but I don't think even he would put up with that.

"You know what" he heard his teacher say, "it'll be easier to just show you."

"I'm really not in the mood for one of your games, Kakashi."

"Oh, it's no game. Follow me, come on."

Naruto swallowed as the sound of footsteps closed in, then turned to face them. Stop being weird. You're fine. There's no reason to be nervous.

"Why are we going in here? What could possibly be-" Sasuke froze. At first glance, it looked like his blonde was there, waiting for him, and for a moment he forgot to breathe. The moment faded when the actual blonde snapped into focus.

"What is he doing here?!" he growled.

"Apologies, Naruto" Kakashi cut in, "he's not always this insufferable to be around."

Sasuke spun around to glare at him. "Why would you bring him here?!"

"Sasuke" Naruto took a step forward, "can we.. can we talk?"

"No. We can't."

"But I-"

"I didn't want you here!" Sasuke screamed, eyes burning with rage and pain. "Just fuck off, Naruto!"

"Sasuke!!" Kakashi shouted, all humor gone. "Do not talk to him like that."

"Whatever. Just leave me alone." He stormed out of the room and rushed up the stairs. They could hear him move down a hall and then a door slammed.

Kakashi glanced over at his dejected house guest. "Naruto, are you ok?"

The blonde nodded but avoided his gaze. "Umm.. Kakashi-sensei?" he said quietly. "Would it be ok if I.. went upstairs for a minute?"

"Naruto.. I don't think he's going to let you in."

Naruto nodded again. "I know. But there's something I want to tell him."

Kakashi clapped a hand on his shoulder and gave him a small smile. "Sure, Naruto. Go ahead."

He moved past him, grabbed a book, and stepped further into the house. "I'll be outside if you need me" he called over his shoulder.

Naruto waited until he heard the back door open and close before heading over to the stairs. Just tell him, he told himself. Sasuke's never going to open up if you don't. It'll be ok. Just tell him.

Naruto padded down the hall and stopped in front of the only closed door. He crossed his fingers and brought it close to his lips. Don't let the truth hurt our friendship. He'll still see me as Naruto.

Just Naruto.

He sank down to the floor, his back pressed firmly against the door. "Sasuke?" he called.

A long silence filled the space between them, but after a while he finally broke it. "Leave me alone, Naruto."

"I.. I want to tell you something."

"I don't care."

Naruto dropped his head back against the door and closed his eyes. "I want to tell you how I.. got my scars."

Silence settled between them once more, but this time he got the sense that he had Sasuke's full attention.

Naruto took a shaky breath and, with his eyes closed, recounted the worst part of his life.

Author Note:

Ahhh.. I just love a good cliffhanger.

Don't you? ;)