AN: Well, here's chapter 15. Well, without further ado…

Let's get on with the show!

XXX

A Man Defined ~ Past

Shinji sat in the plug of the Black Beast; his fingers still wrapped tightly around the controls. His chest heaved with every breath he took, and his eyes stung. I knew piloting this thing would be hard, but damn. This plug just feels wrong. Like it's tainted.

It probably is, Leliel responded to him, this thing… it's essentially an angel, more so than even the cousins… I think. Its existence truly is an odd one. What's worse is that though the soul inside of it is silenced and unable to exert its will upon Armaros, it is definitely thine soul, brother. I believe that is what must be causing this reaction. Nothing I do to it can prevent it from being able to interact with ye.

Shinji grunted in response as he slowly got his breathing under control. A few moments later he looked around the battlefield. The others were getting back to their feet, but he was glad they looked well enough. Asuka and Toji had taken the most damage, but that was to be expected, what with the whole eye lasers thing. Honestly, he shouldn't have been surprised when it happened. He'd just wished he'd been closer at the time so he could have lopped off Sahaquiel's head before she even got that chance.

A screen popped up on his left, showing Asuka's face. One with Misato was right next to it.

"Shinji… Where did you get this Evangelion from?" Misato asked. Shinji's eyes cut away from them with a frown. He really didn't feel like explaining, but he doubted he really had the option to refuse. Well, that was a lie. He could, but he knew doing so would be counterproductive. The Black beast began to sink into a fresh portal, courtesy of Leliel.

"I'll tell you when I get back…" he grumbled, eyes narrowing. He cut the link with them as the Black Beast vanished into the Dirac.

~X~

Misato and the other pilots waited in Central Dogma for Shinji to arrive. Asuka and the Lieutenant Colonel were the most worried amongst them. They'd been the only ones able to talk to Shinji at the end of the battle and what they saw unsettled them. His eyes had been sharp, burning red, and unkind; his hair white as snow. He looked disheveled, as if he'd been in some sort of fight or struggle, but they couldn't understand that considering how easily he'd killed Sahaquiel. Asuka personally thought she'd seen some sort of dark purple glow about him, but assumed it was a trick of the light or something like that.

"Was he alright?" asked Rei. Asuka told the rest of them that Shinji had seemed off when they talked but didn't elaborate any further whilst they were making their way back to Nerv. She held her silence until they arrived in Central Dogma as well, unsettling the others even more. Seeing an equally worried expression on Misato's face didn't help either.

"We're not entirely sure," Misato responded, hesitantly, biting her lip.

"I doubt the boy is hurt," intoned commander Ikari as he stood from his seat and left the room. He had little doubt Ritsuko or Fuyutsuki would keep him in the loop concerning Shinji. Misato shot the man a glare, but kept her mouth shut. The doors closed silently behind the man and she turned her attention back to the pilots.

"As I was saying," she began, "we're not sure. He just seemed very troubled. We can't do much more than wait for him to get here." Her pilots made some disgruntled noises at the news and she could understand. She wished she had more answers for them, but these days she found herself increasingly lost on how to help them. There was just too much out off her control; too much out of everyone's control really. None of the adults were capable of truly assisting these kids on this journey like they should be. They tried their best, but in the end the only ones who could really understand them to the fullest extent were their fellow pilots.

Honestly, she was just happy there were so many of them now. They were invaluable to each other. The doors opened again, and she turned, expecting to see one of the technicians walking in or walking out as they went about their business, checking on something or other. Instead she found herself bearing witness to one of the oddest scenes.

The Ikari family walked into Central. Commander Ikari was sporting a fresh, red hand mark across his left cheek. His face was stoic as ever, but that only served to make the whole thing funnier. A few feet away from him was Yui, looking rather upset with her arms crossed over her chest and her lips downturned. Shinji was slightly in front of his mother and Misato was happy to note that his hair, at least, was back to its typical color.

Kyoko strode past Misato, taking quick, clacking steps up to Yui and promptly throwing her arms around the woman in a gentle hug. Surprised at first, Yui froze up, but proceeded to hug the woman back when she realized who she was. The red hair covering her field of view was a dead giveaway. Elsewhere, Asuka was having a mini panic attack. Shinji's mother was awake, and she had no idea how their first meeting was going to go.

"Yui, I, um… it's… well, it's been entirely too long. I'm glad you're back."

"I'm happy to see you again too, Kyoko," Yui smiled, "I have so much I'd like to talk to you about. And I want to meet all my son's friends too, but Shinji already told me he had something important to talk about with Misato. So, I suppose it will have to wait for a bit." As she said this, Shinji had already walked up to the Lieutenant Colonel and the other pilots.

"How damaged are the Evas?" Shinji led. Misato's face scrunched a bit at that.

"Uh… they're alright. There's going to need some maintenance done, but they'll fully be operational again in seven to eight hours."

"You've got three," he replied. Any other conversations in the room hushed.

"I'm sorry, what?" questioned Ritsuko.

"We've only got about three hours until Sahaquiel comes back. Leliel confirmed that she could tell our kin was reforming and ascending."

"That's not enough time for the damages to the other Evas to be fully repaired. Sure, they weren't a threat to their functionality, but they'll still be connected to the pilots. They won't be able to have very high synchronization numbers like this. Not to mention the damage Sahaquiel inflicted are exploitable. I doubt she'll just ignore them," said Kyoko. She was no longer hugging Shinji's mother, merely standing next to the woman now, a stormy look on her face as the gravity of the situation was setting in.

"She won't," said Leliel as she appeared next to Shinji from the Dirac, "I believe this was all part of the plan. If she failed to defeat us with her initial assault, a quick ascension in order to stifle our recovery time was the ideal. The time it takes to ascend is proportional to one's strength, fully explaining why Sahaquiel chose to take up this endeavor."

"We need to prioritize repairs to the Evas' nervous system. If we can do that, at least the pilots will be able to sync fully," said Kyoko, striding out of the room a moment later to oversee repairs.

"Well… this is a problem then," sighed Misato, "speaking of which… is everything alright, Shinji? You didn't seem well on comms earlier. Did something happen? We're going to need all of us at full strength to take Sahaquiel down, I assume." Rei noted her brother looked distinctly uncomfortable, but with a sigh he spoke.

"I'm well enough. I wasn't looking so good because of the Eva I was piloting. It's not like the others. It is… difficult."

"What is it, exactly? I've never seen an Evangelion like it," Ritsuko inquired, sounding interested. Shinji just sighed again.

"It's an Evangelion from a different dimension in the Dirac. It's known as Armaros. Apparently, it was built on a Nerv moon base. Leliel retrieved it awhile back just in case we'd need it… but that thing is closer to being angel than Evangelion. It feels wrong in the plug. And somehow the soul within it is mine, or the Shinji from its home dimension to be exact… it's so full of anger and hatred. And with our soul's being near identical, it's hard to differentiate who is feeling what… it's stressful and there's bleed over, but I'm fine. I can still pilot."

Ritsuko and Gendo looked skeptical, but they voiced nothing. Their opinions weren't exactly highly valued at the moment. In Ritsuko's case, she could have avoided that simply by keeping said opinions to herself, but over the last couple of days, she'd agreed with certain remarks the commander had made one too many times. She seemed as little more than a cold, angry, puppet in Misato's eyes lately.

Ritsuko knew her friend didn't think too much of her these days, and thus to make sure the danger Shinji posed wasn't entirely ignored, she held her tongue. There's no way they'd pay any attention to what the boy might do if she spoke. Misato's frown had deepened after listening to the boy, and she could see a war ragging behind her friend's eyes. Frustratedly, Misato pinched the bridge of her nose and took some deep breaths.

"Okay… for now you kids get a bit of relaxation in. You're going to need everything you've got for this next fight if the previous ones are anything to go by," Misato said.

~X~

An hour later, Shinji was comfortably cuddling with Asuka on a couch in the pilot's lounge. It had taken thirty minutes for him to actually relax, even with Asuka's help, but he was feeling better now. On his left side, turning a page in her book was Rei. She seemed unconcerned with anything aside from the words on the page as she relaxed against the black leather of the couch. Mari was playing a game of Uno with Toji and Kensuke at a table a few feet away. Every so often he'd hear one of them snort or Mari say her—seemingly—new favorite phrase: "Oho? Are you approaching me? Instead of running away, you're coming right at me?"

He had no idea where the line had come from, but Kensuke apparently did as he'd laugh almost every time. He was glad they weren't stressing out. He wished he could say the same for Leliel, but she was floating upside down above them, as if the annoyingly white ceiling was the floor. Her eyes were distant, and her eyebrows were pulled together in deep thought. He'd tried to get her attention once about ten minutes ago, but that had been fruitless. He was considering trying again when Misato's voice came over the intercom.

"Pilots to Central."

Shinji was doubtful anything good would be said when they got there. Misato sounded less than pleased. The pilots stopped what they were doing and stood before making their way to Central Dogma. Inside the large room they found Kyoko and Misato engrossed in conversation. They were looking at a clipboard in Kyoko's hands, some sort of chart on the paper there.

The two of them turned to the pilots shortly after they walked in. Kyoko sighed and Shinji frowned. As he thought, this would not be good. Holding the clipboard to her side, Kyoko approached them.

"We won't have the nerve damage taken care of before Sahaquiel returns… it's simply too much work. We're only thirty percent of the way there."

"So, what are we supposed to do…?" Kensuke asked.

"Don't sortie," Shinji said, his arms crossed. Asuka protested immediately, saying she wouldn't just let him go out there alone. Rei agreed with her, as did Misato. Shinji wasn't really hearing it though. There weren't any other choices really. They couldn't come with him considering their Evas' conditions.

"Look, I won't be alone. Leliel will be there with me, right?" He looked to his kin and was surprised to see her shake her head.

"No… my accompanying ye will matter not."

"Why not?" Mari asked, sounding almost aggressive.

"There are six seraphs. We know now of four with certainty. Taking that into consideration, we are broken up in tiers even amongst seraphs. Gaghiel, Israfel, and I are on the weaker side… whereas Sahaquiel and the others are above us. Even working with ye brother, we would not best her with but two of us. She is that powerful."

Silence.

Shinji's brows furrowed in thought. That complicated things.

"Can we hold her off long enough for the nerve damage repairs to be completed?" Shinji asked.

"I'd need at least another three hours. She'll be here in two. Can you hold her for that long?" Kyoko inquired. Leliel shook her head.

"It is unlikely… however, I have a way we can defeat her… but brother, I ask that ye do not become too angry with me for this."

"What…?"

"I will be back shortly… I am… sorry, brother." She said as she slipped into an inky black portal beneath her feet. It consumed her in a moment and closed, leaving the others looking at the empty space where she used to be.

"Do you know what she was talking about?" asked Asuka. Shinji shook his head.

"I wish. Just as much of a mystery to me though," he replied. Another thirty minutes passed. Everyone was tense and Kyoko had already gone back to working on the Evas. Shinji was just beginning to really worry when another portal opened in front of them. It was a few feet away and for some reason Shinji felt his heart clench ominously. Something was wrong. He could feel it.

Leliel floated through the portal. Shinji caught her eyes for a second, but she looked away quickly, a melancholy look on her face. He didn't understand why—at first—but then someone else stepped through the portal. Shinji's blood ran hot. His lips pulled back into a sneer and he felt Asuka grip his hand. He shook her off as he stepped forward.

"Hello, Third," drawled his inner angel.

"I told you that if you ever tried messing with me again that I'd find a way to kill you..." said Shinji. Leliel belatedly realized what was happening and tried stepping between them.

"Brother, wai—"

It was too late.

Shinji lunged towards his inner angel. His speed whipping Asuka's hair into her eyes. She quickly moved it out of her face and her eyes fell upon her boyfriend throwing a fist towards her… well, herself. They didn't look exactly the same in some ways, but it was definitely her.

Then there was a burst of flames that emanated from her look-a-like's body. It engulfed Shinji and exploded upwards into a column of fire that licked at the high ceiling of Central Dogma. The room became unbearably hot in mere seconds, but she didn't notice. Her heart was pounding in fear. Shinji was at the center of that fire storm.

Asuka heard something shatter from within the column of flames, as if someone dropped a glass bowl on the ground. Then she felt more than heard something impact the ground hard. Then, as if it was never there to begin with, the blazing pillar and all the heat that accompanied it was just gone. Left in its place was her boyfriend being held to the floor by his neck, her doppelganger leaning over him with a vicious, wild-eyed glare.

"I told Leliel we'd just kill each other if we met again…" her doppelganger scoffed.

"Wha… What?" Shinji choked out, his hands wrapped around her doppelganger's as he tried to pry them off his throat. The back of her hands burst into flame and he flinched away.

"I'm sorry, brother. I did not account for what… that person has been doing to you since your arrival… this is not him. This is the Asuka from your dimension or—as I've come to call her—Nuriel. She is like you." Leliel informed them. Asuka watched her boyfriend's face as the information sunk in, his eyes widened almost comically, and any struggle left in him just fell away.

"Asu…ka?" he asked, his voice wavering.

"Third Child."

"How…?" he asked, looking way from her. Asuka—the other Asuka—scoffed.

"What? Can't look me in the eyes now that the roles are reversed?" she asked harshly, her eyes glowing a malevolent red.

"Nuriel, please. This is not what we're here for," Leliel pleaded. The observers were lost to say thee least. Asuka was the only one who really knew that Shinji and Nuriel hated one another, but she thought this was extreme. She had to be missing something. This was too excessive, especially when they used to work alongside one another.

"Let him go," Asuka said, not fully realizing she'd spoken until Nuriel's eyes rose to meet her own. Her doppelganger held her gaze for a moment, then her eyes dropped back down to Shinji.

"She's defending you?"

Shinji didn't respond.

"Does she know what you did? No… of course not. Of course you wouldn't tell them," Nuriel continued on at his lack of response. Asuka couldn't help but notice that her boyfriend looked resigned to it all.

"Asuka… please let him go." Nuriel froze at that voice and her eyes snapped up again, this time resting on Kyoko for the first time. Her eyes shifted back to a familiar blue, but it did not last. The red returned as Asuka heard Shinji make a pitiful choking noise. Nuriel was tightening her grip.

"Why should I!? You would have me spare my murderer!? This worthless little coward strangles me to death after the apocalypse him and his fucked up family caused, gets a free second chance at life, and now that I'm finally able to repay him you want me to stop!?"

"He… what?" Asuka asked, a lump in her throat. She felt cold. Her eyes searched out Shinji's, but he wouldn't look at her. That was answer enough… it always was with him.

"Sister… please. You and brother Seraphiel have much to work out, but right now we need you. If you don't help, this dimension will fall," Leliel tried. Asuka watched Nuriel grit her teeth before scoffing again and releasing her hold on Shinji's throat. He stayed on the ground for a moment, and when he stood, he looked at no one.

"Asuka, I…"

"Save it, Third. I'll help. But only because I don't want my mom to die. Besides, we have unfinished business. If anyone's going to kill you, it's going to be me," Nuriel spat.

~X~

Shinji sat in Armaros's plug despondently. He could hear the soul trapped within the Black Beast raging, harshly whispering horrible things into his ear. He ignored it. Or he tried to. He couldn't, but he refused to actually acknowledge anything being said. He had no way to distract himself from its murmurs. Though he'd left his comm's open, easily accessible to anyone willing to patch themselves in, no one had bothered to speak to him.

But could he blame them? They'd heard what he'd done. He'd killed Nuriel. She may have found life again somehow, but it doesn't change what he'd done. And Nuriel—he couldn't bring himself to call her Asuka—herself? She looked so different. Her once long hair had been cut short, only managing to reach her shoulders. Her right eye was covered by a black eyepatch and she wore a black beret, blue jeans, and a white tank top covered by a red jacket. And yet underneath all that was her plugsuit. Her good eye shined red, at least, it did when she looked at him. What have I done to her?

"You know what you've done… and is the silence of those Lilin you care for really so surprising?" chuckled his inner angel. This time, he knew it was him. Nuriel would not have willingly entered the plug with him ever again.

"Go away," Shinji said. His inner angel snorted.

"You are not so convincing when you sound as though you've had the very life sucked out of you," his inner angel replied. Shinji didn't have enough fight in him to even get mad. So he decided to ignore him instead.

"Oh, you know that's pointless. You can't ignore yourself," his inner angel continued upon realizing Shinji wasn't going to respond, "You always knew it would come to this. I don't know why you fought so hard over this. You were never going to have your happily-ever-after."

"Go away!" Shinji shouted, gripping the controls harder. His inner angel chuckled.

"You forget that your comm's open, my other self," his inner angel grinned, fading out of his peripheral vision. He was quiet for a moment longer before his enhanced hearing heard a cough from the comm's. Teeth grit, Shinji swore. The third child would have been happy about Misato suddenly speaking up, letting everybody know the Angel had been spotted outside Earth's gravitational pull again, if not for the fact that he knew he was about to have a real fight on his hands. Not to mention the other pilots were all waiting in the plugs of their Evas for when they could launch. They undoubtedly heard his outburst.

Trying to block out the voice of Armaros once more, he focused.

And then an intense chill swept over him.

Snow Fell.

Winds raged.

Sahaquiel spoke.

"Vermin!" A shadow blotted out the sun. Shinji looked up.

"Ye thought me bested; felled by thine warriors, thine lowly half-breed, and my traitorous kin." Her voice sent shivers down Shinji's spine. The roofs of what few buildings remained in the transformable city began to frost over as Sahaquiel's talon-like toes touched down upon the asphalt.

"Now ye will know thine arrogance." Shinji's eyes rose from Sahaquiel's toes, blackened as if frostbitten, and moved up, trailing from her pale blue legs up to her stomach. She had no navel; what lie there in its stead was the purple outer ring of a rainbow-like sclera. From purple to green, to pink, to yellow, to a vibrant orange. And at the center of it all was a black iris.

It was Sahaquiel's eye; iconic in its horror. When he was still in his home dimension, he'd see it in his nightmares on occasion. He couldn't forget it. Feared what would have become of him and his had they failed to prevent her from impacting. Shinji felt his insides squirm as the eye twitched, rolled around on Sahaquiel's emaciated stomach just beneath her visible ribcage and look at him.

"I am the eyes of the Father, that which looks over all within his universe." Shinji tore his eyes from the eyeball only for his gaze to land on Sahaquiel's too-long arms. They didn't seem as though they belonged on her body and led large hands with twitchy, blackened fingers. He heard something flap and rose Armaros's hand to guard his eyes on reflex as the winds picked up. Upon Sahaquiel's back were butterfly wings, so long in their span that the single flap toppled multiple buildings. Each wing had another rainbow-like eyeball.

"My steps towards the father shall bring thine final chill." Buildings everywhere suddenly shattered before the icy rubble righted itself mid-air, unable to even fall to the ground, and launched themselves towards Shinji. He threw up his A.T. Field and blocked the attack, but then gasped as even that began to frost over. He felt himself grow cold. Panicked, he dropped his field only to be caught in the gut by a large chunk of ice that sent him toppling to the ground.

"My gaze marks the end of days! A new ice-age cometh." Gasping for breath, Shinji got back to his feet, his eyes narrowing upon the curtain of hair, tipped with icicles that cut off just above Sahaquiel's breasts, covering her face from view. He could still see them though, three eyes that glowed with chromatic light.

"Ye dared to raise thine hands against us. Ye impede our righteous mission! Thine arrogance knows no bounds and can be tolerated no longer. Thine world shall be swallowed within my frozen void! I am the sheer cold, the all-encompassing frost of the universe, the inescapable chill! I am the Seraph of the Void—I am Sahaquiel!" Shinji watched as she took a rattling breath. She held it for only a moment, but to him it felt like an eternity.

Then an unearthly screech passed through her lips. He felt as though all the warmth had been pushed out of his very bones. The falling snow turned to hail. The waters in the distance froze over in an instant. The ground flash froze. Trees died and shattered on the spot. That coldness settled in his heart and Shinji felt fear. No Seraph had ever seemed this powerful—this insurmountable—before.

"Now know thine place beneath my feet."

XXX

And that's the chapter! Sorry for the cliffy. The fight will come next chapter. I plan for it to be a pretty big/significant one. The first bout against a Seraph of the upper order should be something standalone, I feel. Also sorry for no chapter last month. Took a break for the holidays. Now that I'm back though… hope you guys enjoy this. Leave some reviews for me, yeah? I'd love to hear from you all.

I've made a wattpad, btw. This fic is being posted there, mostly just because I felt like it. I do have some original work there as well though, if anyone is interested. It's not the same as what I have on my though. And hey, it's free.

www dot wattpad dot com/user/CruelZer0