Thomas- Reaching the mountains was easy until we had to go on foot and ended up getting shot at. Currently, Julia, Jorge and I were hiding behind one rusted car, while everyone else took cover elsewhere. Jorge gave me a bomb, why does he even have this, and told me to wait for his count. Julia yelled that we're going to die because I'm going to end up blowing us up, and I told her that now was not the time. Then guns were pointed at us before we had the chance to detonate the bomb, and I flung my arms in front of Julia, blocking her. There were two girls standing in front of us, half of their faces covered, until they saw Aris, then they took off the coverings and flung their arms around him. Apparently, they were in the Maze together. "Never thought we'd have another reason to be grateful for this shank, but I like not having guns pointed at us," Julia said. The girls: Harriet, and Sonya, led us to another car to take us to the Right Arm, which they were also a part of.
Their leader, Vince, met us and inquired who we are, and it seemed like the world wanted to keep making our lives more difficult, because after Harriet announced we are Immunes, Brenda collapsed, and Vince was ready to shoot her because she got infected. Panicking, I tried reasoning with him, asking if there was anything we could do for her. I noticed Julia stand in front of Brenda, a face like thunder, daring Vince to pull the trigger. My heart stopped momentarily, but I stayed focused. Then a woman came over, Mary, and she said that I could help Brenda. Somehow, this woman knew me, and when she hit us with the truth, I froze; I betrayed Wicked; I helped the Right Arm; I was their source, hence my being sent to a Maze. And then Mary looked over at Julia, and she almost dropped to the ground. Vince caught her and asked what was wrong, but Mary shook her head, saying she needed to focus on helping Brenda first, but said she needed to talk to us when she was done, including Julia.
I looked over at her and her face was a mix of shock and confusion, but there was a hint of a smile on her lips as she looked at me. I followed Mary as they carried Brenda into a tent, and it wasn't until she admitted she worked for Wicked that I remembered the random memory I had; Ava and Mary had been friends, the picture on Ava's desk. Ava telling someone that Mary died of the virus. I guess she lied to the person because Mary left and betrayed Wicked. Mary explained the reason they hadn't found a cure, and that the serum she was giving Brenda could only give her a few months of life. "We can't take her with us," she said, solemnly. Then she and Jorge left so Brenda and I could rest. "Come find me when you wake up." I nodded and laid down, sleep hitting me instantly.
**Skip after Thomas & Brenda Talk**
I let Jorge go inside to be with Brenda, while I made my way over to the guys. Julia and Mary were sitting with them too. I sat down on Julia's right, and we waited for Mary to speak. "What I'm about to say might shock you all but…" she paused to look at Julia, smiling sadly at her, but her eyes were bright with emotion. My breath caught in my throat as I remembered the memory once more. No, that's impossible… "It's been a long time since I last saw you, Princess," Mary said softly. Julia stiffened next to me, and Newt placed a hand on her shoulder. "You know her?" Mary nodded. "I've known her most of her life until I left Wicked. I didn't want to leave you behind, I should've taken you with me, but being on the run with a child isn't the smartest thing to do." Julia looked at Mary with disbelief, but she also looked angry. "How do you…" "I was another mother to you, once. You called me Aunt Mary, and you, our beautiful Princess." Julia inhaled sharply, grabbing her necklace. Mary smiled. "We, your parents and I, gave you that on your 5th birthday." Mary sighed and hung her head. I took the moment to really look at Julia, and I was scared, because if what I was thinking is right… God only knows what she'll do.
"Did her parents…" I couldn't even get the words out. Mary smiled sadly, then looked back at Julia. "Your parents worked for Wicked." Five simple words, it's incredible how much damage a few words can do if you use them right. Julia was shaking, her eyes were wide with fear and pain, and she tried getting up but fell. I reached for her while everyone else jumped to grab her, and I sat her back down. "When we were in the Scorch, this guy, Janson, said she couldn't be touched, he was scared of her. Do you know why?" I asked. Mary looked like she wanted to remain silent, like what she had to say would make it all worse. But I had to know, and Julia deserves to know the truth if what I think is right. "Your father was a Pilot, but your mother, she's a doctor… she runs Wicked; Ava Paige." And just like that, I wished desperately that I was wrong. Slowly, as if Julia would break into pieces, I wrapped my arms around her and pulled her into me, as if I could protect her from the awful truth. The guys watched, shock and horror on their faces, as Julia hyperventilated, tears pooled down her face despite how hard she kept her eyes shut. She started coughing and choking, like she was about to be sick, so I dropped her to her knees and rubbed her back, focusing on Newt while she threw up.
Newt's eyes seemed to pop out of his head, this whole time, everything we've been through, I've never seen him this scared. Mary held out a thermos to me and I helped Julia drink as much as she could. Slowly, Newt got down next to her and took one of her hands. "Love, you're nothing like Wicked. You're nothing like your… like Ava. You were a kid; you couldn't have known…" Julia was deathly still. She stopped crying, but tears still clouded her eyes. Her breath was shaky and sounded broken. Minho got down too and slowly reached for her, pulling her into a hug. "Newt's right, you're nothing like those shanks. Explains the bitchiness though." Newt flung his hand out and smacked him on the head, but Julia said nothing, she didn't even laugh. She looked checked out, dissociated from everything. Mary got up and patted her head, then left us alone. "I need to… I need…" Julia's voice was too quiet, we hardly understood her, and she could barely talk. Standing on shaking legs, with Minho's help, she walked away, and every step was wobbly, and she almost fell a few times. None of us moved, not even Newt. No one knew what to say or do. Part of me wanted to go after her, but we couldn't bring ourselves to follow.
We all sat back down on the rocks, quiet for a moment, just looking out at everything. Then we took a moment to remember those who couldn't be here but should've been. The friends we lost. I realized Teresa wasn't here, and asked where she was. Newt pointed over to a small cliff on the mountain behind us, so I got up and went to check on her. On the way, I saw Julia far out in the distance, far away from everyone and the camp. I don't know where she's going, but I really hope she won't go too far. When I reached Teresa, she seemed off, then she started talking about her memories, and what happened to her mother. "I need you to understand… why I did it," she choked out, trying to hold back tears. I was so confused, until I saw lights out in the distance, headed our way. No, Teresa, no… "What did you do?" She had the nerve to look sorry, but I was panicking, running down the mountains, praying I could warn everyone. But Wicked reached them first. Shots fired, soldiers were everywhere, things were exploding, it was carnage. Wait, Wicked… oh, God, Julia! Julia was alone, but I was too far away to reach her.
I found Jorge and Brenda, and we ducked behind a car, trying to stay safe. I noticed Newt, Minho, and Fry making their way to Vince, grabbing guns, and trying to help take down soldiers. I wanted to run and help them, but Jorge held me back, saying I couldn't help them, and that we'd be in trouble unless we left now. "No, I can't leave them. You guys need to get out while you can't," I told them. Brenda opened her mouth, as if she were going to change her mind, but in the end, they left, wishing me luck. I watched, hidden, as soldiers grabbed other kids, including my friends, and put them in groups. Janson was here, taking count of the Immunes, and looking for me. I didn't fight, I gave myself up, walking over slowly, kneeling next to Minho. He asked why I didn't run, "I'm tired of running." I'm done. Another Berg landed, and out stepped the head bitch herself, Ava Paige. Then Teresa came over, and I told the guys that she was a traitor, and she had the nerve to make it out like she was in the right.
"What the fuck?!" We all turned and saw Julia, and my nerves shot up at a hundred. Then her eyes locked onto Teresa, and I saw the fire that had been snuffed out so long ago burst and burn in her eyes. She marched up at her and cracked her, hard, and down she fell. "I knew we couldn't trust you! You fucking bitch!" Julia screamed at her. I sighed, thinking of all of Julia's hostility towards her, remembering how Newt said she was good at reading people; Julia was always right, he had said, and I hated myself for not trying to understand her. "Julia…" Ava gasped. We all looked at her in horror, except Julia, she was all anger. "My little Princess…" Ava began, but Julia spat at her. "You dare…" Julia couldn't even talk, all her anger seemed to burn away her words, and she was shaking, this time from pure rage. "So, you sacrificed your own daughter for some stupid cure?" Julia spat the words at Ava through her teeth. "No! Never! You're my daughter! I put you in the Maze because I couldn't bear to lose you! You found everything out, and I wanted…" "You wanted to protect yourself and all your fucked up crimes?! You erase my memory and send me into a place created to cause mental trauma, to study us like lab rats, for what?!" I glanced around at Newt, and we shared the same terrified look.
"Out of fucked up curiosity, what was supposed to happen back in the Scorch? Was I going to be harvested too?" Julia growled. "No! You were going to be brought home, brought back to me!" Ava yelled, pleading with Julia. "My home is with my friends, the people you hurt and sacrificed! The people you killed! You destroyed my home! What makes you think I would've stayed with you, knowing what I know?! What I've been through!" And in that moment, I felt a small pang of guilt over Gally, and I was shown yet another reason they'd been together. Oh, Julia… "Julia, you don't…" Julia punched Teresa again, causing her to yelp in pain, clutching her eye. Ava sighed, and tried defending herself, saying she wasn't a monster, and we all looked at her like she was crazy, which she is. Then Mary came through, going back and forth with Ava, until Janson shot her. Julia choked on a scream, and Vince was in agony, clutching Mary's body. Then Wicked went to take us, but I was so done; with Wicked, with the loss, everything, so I pulled out the bomb Jorge had given me earlier, finger on the trigger.
Ava, Teresa, and Janson tried reasoning with me, Teresa was crying, but I didn't care. "I'm not going back," I said, struggling to keep it together. Then Minho, Newt, and Fry came over, huddled close to me, telling me to pull the trigger, that they were ready. And then Julia came over and rested her hand on my shoulder. Ava started screaming, Janson was holding her back, eyes wide in terror. "No! Not her, not my baby!" "Fuck you," Julia hissed at her, tears in her eyes. We looked at each other, and she smiled at me, big, and beautiful. I wrapped an arm around her, and she laid her head on my shoulder. She placed her hand on my chest and Newt placed his hand over hers. They smiled at one another, then he smiled at me, and I almost didn't pull the trigger, wanting to see that smile always. But I knew this was the better option, and clearly so did my friends. "Julia! No, come back! I can't lose you too!" Ava pleaded again, reaching for Julia as much as she could. Julia said nothing, she raised her middle finger, and I choked on a laugh.
And then a truck came zooming in, crashing into a plane, causing it to explode, debris flying everywhere, and we all had to duck to avoid getting killed. Then all Hell broke loose; guns being fired from both sides, Immunes getting grabbed by Wicked or fighting back. People running away or running to fight. I pushed Julia over to Newt and made sure they ran off far enough until I followed, only to get jumped by Janson, but before he could shoot me, someone hit him first, Brenda. I caught up with everyone, but Minho grabbed a gun to cover us, making sure we were all safe. Then he tried running after his ammo ran out, but he was shocked, and down he went. Julia and I both screamed for him, trying to run after him as they dragged him away, but Jorge grabbed me, and Newt was pulling Julia back. We all watched helplessly as Wicked took Minho from us, and any remaining Wicked soldiers boarded the Berg. Ava and Teresa watched us with disappointed faces, Janson glaring at us like he wished us dead. And then they were gone; anyone from the Right Arm still alive cheered in victory, but for us Gladers, we were in another nightmare.
I felt someone pull my hand and turned slowly to see Julia looking at me with a pained, pleading face, pleading that what just happened wasn't real. Pleading that she didn't just lose someone else she loves. Newt's face matched hers, Fry's eyes were closed, his face turned sideways, as if he could pretend this wasn't real. Jorge, Vince, and Brenda watched us, silent, faces filled with sympathy. I pulled Julia and Newt into my arms, Fry doing the same from behind them, linking us all together. A safe circle. "Can I hug you now?" I whispered to Julia. The laugh she let out was broken, and she gripped my arms like her life depended on it, like she needed strength. Newt let her go and nudged her into my arms, and I wrapped them around her completely. This was nothing like the first hug I'd given her, back at Marcus' place, this one meant something. She sniffled, but she didn't cry. I tried to give her whatever strength I had left through the hug, I hugged her like I wanted to shield her from all the loss.
Vince suggested we all put out the small fires and then rest for the night. Julia let go of slowly, her arms slipping off me and falling limply at her sides. She took Vince's' hands and said something to him about Mary. He looked at her appreciatively, but his eyes held back tears. Together they went back to Mary's body, and we watched as she placed her hand on Mary's head and whispered something. Vince hugged her and they kneeled in silence, one morning the loss of their love, the other morning the loss of family that they had forgotten. Newt and I met each other's eyes, feeling sorry for Julia once again. Jorge and Brenda joined Harriet in putting out fires, while Newt, Fry, and I went around helping to set up tents or fixing ones that had fallen in the chaos. An hour had gone by until we had finished, and the heavy weight of everything hit us all hard, sleep lulling us more and more with each second.
People were dragging themselves to tents for bed, Vince among them, but it was more of a struggle for him; he sleeps alone now. Fry and Brenda followed Jorge and Harriet to another tent, but Newt and I couldn't sleep yet. "We'll come to bed soon, we have to…" Newt trailed off, glancing at Julia, she had walked away from the camp, back to the spot she was earlier. Our friends nodded and wished us goodnight before leaving us. "Tommy… did you know… Julia…" Newt didn't to finish his question, I knew what he meant. "Sort of. Back in the Scorch, I had a random memory of when I worked for… them. Ava was telling someone Mary had died of the virus, and there was a picture of the two of them holding a baby." Newt's face was unreadable as I talked. When he said nothing, I continued, "When Mary called Julia "Princess" I remembered the memory, and I put it all together, but I hoped I was wrong. At first, I thought Mary was going to tell us Julia was hers, but, well…" I trailed off. Newt sighed, nodding. He started walking, and I followed. "She can't be alone after all this. She'll break, Tommy." I sighed and stood in front of him, gripping his shoulder. "I think she's already broken, Newt." Pain flashed in his eyes, and he turned away, like he couldn't face the truth of my words.
He ran the rest of the way to Julia, despite his limp, and I kept up with him, glancing over here and there to make sure he was okay. When we reached Julia, she was standing so still we had to check she was still breathing. Her eyes were looking up at the sky, but I don't think she was really looking at anything, or maybe she's remembering the Berg flying away with Minho. "Julia, love, you should get some sleep," Newt spoke softly. I noticed he didn't reach out to touch her, like he usually does. Maybe he's afraid she'll physically break if he did. She said nothing, gave no indication she heard him, just stared up at the sky, mindlessly, her eyes empty. "Love?" Newt called her. Again, nothing. I nodded over to her, asking him to let me try. He nodded, understanding what I meant. I stood in front of Julia and placed my hands on her shoulders, calling her name. Nothing. I squeezed her shoulders, not wanting to shake her, and this time, she looked down at me. She said nothing, just gazed at me with empty eyes, and it cut me. "I want to stay out here… please." Her plea came out in a small whisper, almost childlike, and I felt sad hearing it. "Love, you shouldn't… you need to sleep in a bed, warm… safe." Newt choked on that last word, and Julia turned away from us. "I want to stay out here," she repeated. "I need to be alone." Newt was about to argue, but I stopped him, placing my hand on his chest, looking at him imploringly.
We stared at one another; I frowned at the pain in his eyes, he looked ready to yell, or scream, to break. Newt, who was always trying to be so strong for everyone else, the Glue, as the Gladers called him. I wrapped one arm around him, and flung the other out to grab Julia, pulling them both into a hug. Newt's arms flung around us, Julia just let it happen, but she didn't move to hug us back. But it was okay, we could be strong enough for her. Newt whispered goodnight to her and dragged himself away. I looked back at her one more time and gave her a small smile. She didn't return it, she didn't acknowledge me, just turned away to sink slowly to the ground and wrapped her arms around herself. I turned to follow Newt back to camp. When we reached a tent, we sunk into our beds, laying on our sides to look at each other, and we didn't look away until sleep grabbed hold of us and then there was nothing.