Dark and wiry. That was what the alp feather looked like under the microscope. After that encounter in Chinatown, Egon managed to catch the feather just in time. He had carefully place it into a plastic bag right before the demon was sucked into the ghost trap. The intricate details were just like a bird's feather, except with ectoplasmic activity. He felt like Captain Ahab capturing the sliver of a tooth from Moby Dick, and like that scenario (which never actually occurred in the book), he was far from over in his hunt. After all, Moby Dick was just one whale and there was an unspecified number of these demons that had more complicated motives than "being a whale."

The lab was quiet except for the humming of electronic analyzing machines. Those bacterial and fungus samples were full of life but too small to make any noise. Oh, what a commotion they'd make if they were much bigger than they were.

But then he heard the familiar sounds of heels walking up the steps. Egon could recognize that sound instantly. It was Janine. What could she possibly be doing here? Her shift ended an hour and a half ago.

The steps became louder until they stopped in that very room.

"Egon, can we talk?" asked Janine.

Egon took his eye off of the microscope and turned around. Janine was standing there with Casey in her arms. She gave off the vibe of a librarian who was irate with a bunch of noisy teenagers. Why did she have to be here? Didn't she know that one shouldn't bring a baby into a laboratory?

"Really, Janine?" asked Egon, "Right now?"

"It's never a good time, is it?" asked Janine, "Which means that it's as good a time as any."

Egon sighed. "Okay, what is it?"

"I'm starting to think that you don't love Casey. You've been cold toward him at best and at worst, you pretend he doesn't exist."

"Janine, of course I care about him and acknowledge his existence. I visit him every so often and send him money, don't I?"

"Well, whoopdie-doo. What do you want, a freaking medal? He needs somebody who does more than just visit him every so often."

"Well, in case you haven't noticed, I've been busy lately."

"Busy doing what? Studying your spooks? Playing with your toys?"

It was amazing what words could do. People downplaying Egon's work was not at the top of the list of things that would irk him, but it was pretty far up there. "As a paranormal scientist, it is up to me to think about not just the intricate details but also the big picture. When ghosts attack, the entire city is at stake. Do you want me to put that aside to focus on just one tiny person? I have more and better work to do."

"Egon, for God's sake! Casey is your son, not a houseplant! It says a lot that the other guys have been far more supportive of me than you have, even though they have close to the same job as you and – Oh, yeah – you're the father!"

Egon's skin bristled. He hated being reminded of this, possibly even more than his work being downplayed. He gritted his teeth. "I keep telling you, Janine, you don't know for sure if I'm his father!"

"It's good you brought that up because that's the other reason why I came here." Janine took a piece of paper out of her handbag and unfolded it as best she could. "I got the results of the paternity test back today."

"What do they say?"

"You pass with flying colors. Congratulations." Janine handed the piece of paper to Egon. "It says what I, everyone else, and Casey's birth certificate have been saying this entire time."

Egon skimmed through paragraphs and data that were on the piece of paper. Yes. It was legitimate. There was no denying it any longer. He supposed it was good that the pizza delivery guy wasn't the father. He was pretty sure that kid was still in college. It was also good that the mayor wasn't the father. That man already had plenty on his plate. It was difficult enough running New York City without ghosts running amok. At the very least, Egon was hoping that this baby would end up being Louis Tully's problem. Janine had been sweet on him for a little while. But no. That little weirdo got off Scott-free. Maurice the cat would have to be his baby for now.

Nonetheless, he had no time for this shit. He turned around, slammed the piece of paper onto the table and went back to looking at the feather through the microscope.

"Oh, so, the science that you love so much has shown you that you've been neglecting your parental duties and you just choose to ignore it," said Janine, "Is that what this has come to?"

"What do you want me to do with him?" asked Egon, "Nothing more than what I'm doing is going to matter. It's not like he's going to remember this point in his life anyway."

"Egon, it's not just about him. It's about me as well. Parenting is hard, Egon. Don't get me wrong, I love being a mother. But I don't just want to be Janine the Mother. I also want to be Janine the Okay Baker, Janine the Lover of Puzzles, Janine the Person Who Sings Great Karaoke When She's Drunk."

Like an active volcano that last erupted hundreds of years ago, Egon felt sputtering rage well up within him. He trembled a bit, trying to push down those feelings, but those feelings were not going to sway to any pushes. After all, magma tended to burn anything in its way.

"Egon, I feel like I'm losing myself! And frankly, I think you've been losing yourself, too."

"Well, would you look at that!" said Egon. He turned back around and pushed aside his microscope. "Janine is having an identity crisis! Meanwhile, the city has been overrun with sleep paralysis demons that have mysterious motives that could put everyone including you and the baby at risk! YOUR PROBLEMS SUDDENLY DON'T SEEM SO SIGNIFICANT NOW, DO THEY?!"

Casey responded to Egon's outburst by wailing and clutching onto his mother's blouse. Janine looked at Egon in shock.

"Egon, there is a time and a place for everything," said Janine. She didn't yell but she spoke loud enough to be heard over the baby's cries. "NOW is not the time and THIS is not the place for that tone!"

Janine looked like she was on the verge of tears, herself. She stared down Egon, expecting him to say something. It wasn't like she cared what he would say. After all, she could take it, even when she was at a breaking point.

Quite frankly, Egon was shocked, too. He didn't emote very much and this was just one of the reasons why.

"Sorry, I… I…" he said, "I think I need some fresh air."

"Yeah, I'd say so!" said Janine as she rocked the distressed infant, "And don't come back until those jets are fully cooled!"

Egon left the firehouse for some fresh air, or at least as fresh as New York City air could get. There was no doubt that he was a man who thought about things. There was no doubt that he was a man who overthought about things. But now he had to think about things that he didn't think enough about. He had to think about his own problems and his own ways of reacting to them.

He still had some rage left in him and the best way to get it out was to go into an alleyway and kick the nearest trashcan, which he did. He kicked it hard enough to make a clang that reverberated several stories up.

"Hey, buddy!" said a man outside his window, "What did that trashcan ever do to you?"

"Er… sorry, sir!" said Egon, "It won't happen again." Unfortunately, it wasn't like Egon could punch a pillow right now. Maybe some nice scenery would calm him down.

Egon walked far enough to find himself at a park. He sat down on a bench next to an overfilled waste receptacle. The pigeons strutted around and pecked for any morsels that were at Egon's feet. He didn't think about it very much but these birds had some pretty colors up close and the coos they made were soothing. He could see why Nikola Tesla liked these birds so much.

Then he remembered that Nikola Tesla didn't have any children. The famous underappreciated scientist didn't have to think about any child when looking at these birds, much less any cold relations toward said child.

When Egon saw the results of the paternity test, it told him that Casey was his, specifically that Casey was his problem. But if he knew one thing about data, it was that it didn't make moralistic accusations. People did. The issue here was with the way Egon thought about it. Casey wasn't the mayor's problem or the pizza guy's problem or Nathan Corman's problem or even Egon's problem. In fact, Casey wasn't a problem at all; he was a baby. He was completely innocent in all this. If anybody was the problem, it was Egon.

Egon had his reasons to focus on his work, especially if there were nightmare demons attacking people in their sleep. But the rest of the time, he was mainly doing filler work that didn't need to be done. Janine was right. He was using the excuse of "brushing up on his research" to ignore his new family. He made the mother of his child feel unloved and unwanted and, when confronted with this, he made his infant son cry. He was a monster. If anybody deserved to be blasted by a proton gun and sucked into a ghost trap, it was him.

But why did he feel this way? He was happy (although still kind of nervous) to become a new parent, but only until Janine went into labor. He felt like running away at that moment. He was just like Doctor Frankenstein right after bringing his creation to life. It had been years since he read that novel but he remembered that it did not end well for Frankenstein's monster. If Egon had to pick an example from his own life, it would be when he was in the fifth grade and he hid in the janitor's closet to avoid giving a speech in front of the entire school. He eventually gave his speech but after much prodding from the principal.

He eventually faced that fear. However, it was for something that could be done within fifteen minutes and then forgotten about for years. The same couldn't be said about fatherhood.

But what man would admit that he was afraid, especially of something that millions of men before him did?