To Be More

Sakura panted and wiped away the sweat on her forehead as she bundled together the combination of freshly cut bamboo and wood onto her wagon. It was time to make a new batch of bow and arrows for her shop as well as making sets of household items to sell. She was stressing out because she had woken up later than usual and now was rushing to get back to open her shop for the day.

Not to mention she had to get back in time to brew tea for Sasuke as well.

"Why does this load have to be extra heavy today?" She groaned as she pulled the wagon onto the dirt road to go back to town.

It took her about a good twenty minutes of traveling before she actually reached the town and another ten minutes before reaching her shop.

Her heart dropped when she saw Sasuke already there.

"I'm so sorry! You've probably been waiting for a long time already." Sakura apologized immediately.

Sasuke was surprised to see her disheveled appearance and sweat dripping down the side of her face. His feet seemed to move on its own when he saw the fully loaded cart of wood and bamboo she was hauling and ran over to lift the handle out of her hand.

"Shouldn't you ask at least another person or two to help you pull this? This is too much on your body." Sasuke scolded lightly as he pulled the wagon over to the side of the shop and set the handle down.

Sakura seemed to pay no attention to his heeding as she hurriedly scrambled some dried herbs together and poured water into a kettle to heat the water.

Sasuke noticed how stressed and frantic she was and he walked over to her. Hesitating for a bit, he then reached over and caught her by surprise by grabbing both of her hands and stopping her.

Sakura could feel her cheeks heating up from his actions.

"Sakura. Take a breath and calm down." Sasuke advised and was more at ease her tense shoulders relaxed and dropped down. "It's not like I'm going to have your head cut off if you don't have the tea ready by the time I'm here."

"I'm sorry, I just...I just didn't want to waste your time. I know you have to do your daily rounds and that you have a busy schedule." Sakura apologized once again.

"It's fine. I don't mind waiting." Sasuke reassured her.

Sakura stood awkwardly, not really sure if she should pull her hands away or not from his grasp.

Sasuke glanced down at her hands and realized that they were rougher than expected. Well, it would make sense for it to be like that from the years of making weaponry and gathering and grinding herbs for her shop. He turned her hands over so that he could examine her palms and sure enough, there was the evident callus on her fingers and palms from her labor.

"You have all kinds of medicinal herbs. Why not use them to treat your hands?"

Embarrassed that he was examining her hands so intensely, she abruptly pulled away from him. "I just don't have time, that's all. Besides, treatment won't be much help anyways with the work that I do."

"It would do good to take a break and allow it to heal properly."

Sakura shook her head. "I can't afford to take a break."

Sasuke could only sigh at her stubbornness. He watched as she turned back to the kettle and poured the hot water into a cup before handing it to him. He wondered how he could offer to take some stress off her shoulders. It would be difficult to find some free time, but he could make it work somehow. He would have to change his daily routine just a bit if he wanted to accommodate her into his schedule.

"Would you be willing to step away for a few hours?" He suggested.

"Hm? Why?" Sakura shook her head. "To do what?"

Sasuke almost sighed yet again. Goodness, did she think there was nothing else in the world to do except to work in her shop? "...I thought it would be nice if we had a meal together."

Sakura fought the urge to stare at him like he was crazy. "I can cook my own meal here. Besides, I brought along some dried mackerel that will help to keep my energy through the day."

"Well, we are friends now, are we not?" Sasuke insisted on. "It would not make sense for all our interactions to just be here in front of your shop."

Sakura stayed quiet. She thought of Ino and Hinata and all the times she blew them off so she could stay to tend to her business. She was always guilty when she turned them away, and that same guilt was creeping up in her stomach right now with Sasuke. She glanced back at the stack of bamboo and wood that she had worked so hard to haul here and thought that she still had much to do.

However...how could she deny Sasuke when all he's done is help her?

"I...I guess...I can spare a few hours with you." She agreed hesitantly. She turned around to cover her herbs and made sure everything was in place before she could leave. "Will I just be riding on your horse with you?"

"We can just walk." Sasuke shrugged.

"O...oh. But wouldn't people be staring?" Sakura still felt insecure about being seen with him. She can already imagine the gossip around town if they were seen walking together, not to mention they would also be sharing a meal together as well.

"It does not bother me." Sasuke remained stoic and started walking ahead.

Sakura scrambled to cover the last of her herbs before catching up with him.

She kept a few inches behind him and kept her head hung low when she could already see some villagers staring and whispering. She gasped when she suddenly bumped into Sasuke's back, not realizing that he had stopped walking.

"Sorry-,"

"Walk next to me, not behind me. It's not like you are my servant or anything." Sasuke cut her off and turned slightly to face her, waiting for her to come.

Sakura slowly and nervously stepped closer to him until they were shoulder to shoulder. As Sasuke started walking again, she made sure her steps were in unison with his and that she was walking the same pace.

"So...when you do your daily rounds, do you have to report back to the palace?" She decided she should stir up a conversation rather than just walking in silence. She needed a distraction from all the looks they were getting.

"A monthly update. I write about the condition of the general economy of the district, what needs improvements, and address any concerns that I cannot solve myself."

"How is this district compared to the one you came from? I can imagine things are not as interesting."

"I enjoy it."

Sakura was surprised by his response. "You enjoy it? I've been here my whole life and things are simple here. There's not much entertainment."

"That's why I enjoy it. Not much conflicts and the villagers are nice. It makes my job easier."

Sakura nodded understandably. That made her wonder if his previous district gave him a lot of troubles. She was curious about his background. He seemed a bit...lonely, to say the least. She noticed that he did not speak to others unless necessary and strictly adhered to his duties. Though despite that, he was kind and spoke calmly. Usually with other shoguns and daimyos who were in charge here, their demeanor was almost just like Orochimaru's - boastful, haughty, and tyrannical.

Sasuke was different. A good different.

"Do you have any places around here that have good food?" Sasuke asked once they passed by a few food merchants. Some shops were filled with freshly steamed buns, while others were filled with cooked meats and side dishes.

Sakura thought for a moment before one particular place came to mind. "Well...I do know one that I personally enjoy. The owner's daughter is a friend of mine."

Ino's parents owned a fairly popular food shop that was well known for their seafood and vegetable dishes. As soon as Sakura arrived alongside Sasuke and was seated at a table, Ino immediately came out to greet them.

"Welcome!" She bowed towards Sasuke. "It's such an honor to have you here, Lord Sasuke."

"Sakura recommended this place."

Ino clasped her hands together and stared affectionately at Sakura. "It would make sense that she would! She is my precious friend...and she's also single-,"

Sakura cleared her throat loudly. Goodness, it was just not a good time to be taunting her right now, especially in front of Sasuke. "We'd like to order."

"Of course, of course! I do recommend our steamed seabass and grilled eels, along with our seaweed soup and sides of white rice."

"We will just get that then." Sakura replied quickly, hoping to steer Ino away as soon as possible.

"Coming right up! So...I have been noticing you two together often. If it is not too much to ask, Lord Sasuke, is it because you have taken an interest in my friend?"

Sakura rolled her eyes at Ino's question.

"We are just having lunch as friends, Ino." She answered before Sasuke could say anything and grabbed the side of Ino's kimono, pulling her closer. "Please stop being nosy." She whispered pleadingly.

"Well, it is always so hard to convince you to hangout but here you are, willingly taking time out of your day to have lunch with no one other than the most handsome shogun in all of Japan!" Ino almost squealed.

Sakura groaned and quickly shooed her away. "We're hungry, please just hurry up with our food."

She turned back to Sasuke and bowed apologetically. "Sorry, she is always like that. She is just a very...happy person."

"No worries. She seems like a good friend." Sasuke noticed she looked a bit embarrassed. He hoped that she was not overthinking Ino's teasing. It honestly just seemed like Ino was happy that she was here with a man, which was something normal for friends to be excited about, he supposed.

That also made him curious if she's ever had a lover in the past.

"Have your friends...ever seen you together alone with another man like this before?"

Sakura was a bit taken back by his question, but she shook her head at him. "No...I guess I never had the time to make acquaintance with other men. Besides, I am not too worried about it. I accept life as it is...if someone comes into my life and I happen to like him, and can imagine myself building a life with him, then of course I would consider things such as courtship and marriage. But right now, it is not my priority."

Sasuke stayed quiet and made a short nod. With the way she was attached to her work, it would make sense for her to not have time to talk with other men.

"Well, what about you?" Sakura suddenly asked. "Did you have anyone where you came from? Any special women in your life?"

A stab of pain jolted through Sasuke's chest as Karin flashed in his mind. He was not sure if he was ready to talk about her to anyone yet, let alone Sakura who he barely knew for only a few months.

Sakura could see the change in his expression and she suddenly regretted asking him that. Maybe he had a dark past of some sort? Or maybe it was a relationship that did not end well?

"Sorry." Sakura muttered. "If it is something too personal, you don't have to tell me."

Sasuke felt bad that he could not be transparent with her about that part of his life, but it was still too painful. For some reason, he couldn't bring it in himself to speak it out loud yet.

"Um, what about family? I mean, it is obvious you came from an honorable family, considering the fact that you are a shogun. Would you mind telling me about them?"

"They're dead."

Sakura almost wanted to slap herself for asking that. She should probably keep her mouth closed now. She wondered if that meant he grew up as an orphan like her. Although it was no doubt that he had more luxuries in life than her, she was sure that it was still a lonely journey all by himself.

Sasuke glanced at her when he noticed that she did not bother to ask anymore questions. He felt bad because small talk was not his strength. He always answered to the point and only spoke when necessary, but now that they were supposedly friends, he knew he had to pry out of his shell - even if it meant revealing the most intimate and troubled times of his past.

"...they were killed by bandits." He continued on. "I was seven. My older brother hid me in a wardrobe so I was the only one safe from the attack, but I still saw everything that happened. I've been by myself since then. Even though it was years ago, the details of that night is still etched into my mind. If I could avenge my family, it would give me a greater purpose in life, but I can't even do that because I have no way of finding out the identities of those bandits." Sasuke paused, thinking back to the good memories he had with his family before they passed. "...they were good people. My father was wise, my mother was kind, and my brother...was my protector. At seven years old...they were everything to me." It was strange. This was the first time he ever spoke of his family to someone. He didn't even tell Karin, even though they had courted for so many years.

It was like a heavy load was lifted off his shoulders. Maybe it was because he had harbored his sorrow all by himself for so long, that by telling it to someone now, it was a release he never knew he needed. His body almost jumped from the sudden touch of Sakura's hand over his. He looked up at her and was taken back by her expression completely filled with genuine compassion.

"I'm so sorry you had to endure all of that. No little boy should ever have to witness something like that. I can't imagine what you felt in that moment, but I know the feeling of growing up without family. It's hard and brutal...and lonely...but..." Sakura smiled at him and slightly squeezed his hand. "...you were strong enough to make it to today. That's all that matters."

Sasuke's chest swelled up with a kind of warmth that he has never felt before. What in the world was happening right now? And why was it that whenever she smiled at him, his mind would go completely blank as if he was frozen in time? In his entire life, no one has ever offered words of comfort or sincerity to him. He didn't know how to respond and frankly, he was absolutely speechless right now.

"Ooooh my gosh! How bold of you two!"

Ino's high pitched squeal snapped the both of them back to reality. Her gaze was intensely transfixed on how Sakura's hand was holding Sasuke's. "My goodness, Sakura, have you been keeping this a secret from me and Hinata?! You were lying to me earlier, weren't you? Lord Sasuke, you are a very lucky man. She is the most hard-working person I know, and I guarantee that if you bring her home as your wife, you will be the happiest man on earth!"

Sakura blushed at Ino's words and immediately let go of Sasuke's hand. Sasuke himself was a bit flustered by Ino's comment and he just lightly cleared his throat and averted his eyes away.

Ino chuckled lightly at their embarrassed reactions. "Well, your food is ready. Please enjoy...you love birds." She snickered on her way back to the cooking area as a few servants quickly set the freshly cooked foods on the table.

"I apologize for her manners. She should be more respectful towards you." Sakura sighed and shook her head. She would have to scold Ino later. "Let's eat...hopefully the food is to your taste." She passed a bowl of rice over to him and gestured for him to eat first.

Sasuke could not help but steal glances at Sakura as they ate. He hated this internal conflict within himself. It was hard to keep a guard up around her when she was full of surprises. He promised himself to not get too close to her, but he was already contradicting that. He honestly would not mind having a deeper connection with her, to even be precious and life-long friends if possible, but he was just scared. He did not want to lose her, like he lost everybody else in his life.

Sakura happened to be stealing glances at him also. Hearing about his past made her heart ache. She was going to make sure that she would be a good friend to him, and she hoped their friendship would be something that gave him strength.

More than that, she hoped that she would be able to be his place of peace and comfort amidst all the hardships in his life.

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