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Order in the Court (1/1)

Steve, Danny, and Kono stood around the smart table trying desperately not to laugh as an angry looking Chin stalked through the glass doors into the bullpen.

He stopped, hands on hips, and glared at his co-workers.

"Go ahead," he said. "Get it out of your systems."

"How was court this morning?" Kono asked before dissolving into laughter.

"Or maybe the more important question," Danny said as he tried hard to school his features. "How was jail this morning?"

Chin shook his head with a wry smile as the other team members fought to control their laughter. The frustration of the morning was beginning to subside and it was hard not see the more comical aspects of what had happened.

"Did Judge Callahan really arrest everyone in the entire courtroom?" Steve asked.

"Every single person." Chin removed his tie and stuffed it in his pocket. "I've never seen anything like it."

"Anyone who has ever been in his courtroom knows how much he hates cell phones going off during trial," Kono said. "He starts every court session warning everyone to turn off all devices."

"I know. Everything was going along fine. I was almost done explaining how we found Suarez hiding under his mother's porch with all the stolen money and drugs still in his possession," Chin said. He held up his thumb and forefinger an inch apart. "I was this close to being out of there. Five more minutes and I would have been home free. Then all of the sudden a phone rang."

"I'm sure Callahan hit the roof," Danny said.

"To say the least." Chin unbuttoned the top button on his shirt. "He asked whose phone it was and nobody fessed up. So he asked again. Still nothing. Then he threatened to arrest everyone in the place and hold them all in contempt until someone claimed responsibility."

"Can he even do that?" Kono asked.

"Apparently he can." Chin removed his suit jacket and tossed it on the nearest chair. "He ordered everyone but the jury down to the holding cells to be booked on contempt of court charges. At first I thought he didn't mean me too," he said. "But I was wrong."

"How did it get resolved?" Danny asked with a grin. "Or are you still facing charges?"

"It only took about 30 minutes in the holding cell for the new paralegal from the PA's office to come clean. He said he knew the rule but was just so nervous about making a good impression on his first day in court that he forgot, then panicked when it rang."

Kono chuckled. "Callahan will have him cleaning the courtroom on his hands and knees as punishment."

"The PA and the paralegal were in the judge's chambers hashing things out when I left," Chin said. "They recessed the trial until tomorrow morning. With any luck I'll get in and out before anything else weird happens."

"Don't tempt fate. It reminds me of the second time I ever testified in court." Danny smiled at the memory. "It was a simple B and E. Defendant was a low level thug and petty thief. My training officer had arrested him at least three times in the last six months. Kid was a real knucklehead. But my TO said it was gonna be a piece of cake testimony. Open and shut case."

Steve smiled. He'd heard this story before but loved hearing Danny retell it.

"So I get up on the stand," Danny continued. "My uniform is pressed just so, my badge is shining. And I give my testimony. When I'm finished the defense attorney says he might need to recall me for a few more questions after his next witness testifies. He was calling the knucklehead's girlfriend who was there during the arrest. In those days, they didn't make you leave the courtroom if you were gonna be recalled. They just told you to sit in the gallery."

Chin nodded. "I remember those days."

"So the girlfriend gets up on the stand and starts talking about what a great guy the knucklehead is and how he would never do anything wrong and how the police just target him because they need a scapegoat and on and on," Danny said. "I mean she was pouring it on really thick. My training officer was sitting beside me real calm because this is exactly what he expected. He'd seen it all before.

And let me tell you she was the typical Jersey-style knucklehead's girlfriend. Big hair, red lipstick, and earrings as big as saucers. She starts talking about how she's pregnant and how excited he is to become a father and how he would never do anything to jeopardize that. She holds up her hand and points to this cubic zirconia and talks about how they're planning a wedding. She points to the defendant who was wearing a gold earring in one ear and says that she bought him that as an engagement present. Then out of nowhere this juror in the front row of the jury box goes nuts. She jumps up and starts screaming that the witness is lying. That she isn't pregnant and there is no baby."

"Wait…one of the jurors knew the witness?" Kono asked incredulously.

Danny barked a laugh. "If only it was that simple. This juror hopped the railing towards the witness and she was ready to go. I mean like taking off her earrings ready. And the witness wasn't backing down either. My training officer and I helped the bailiffs get everything calmed down. Once we did, the judge questioned the juror and asked her what was going on.

She said that she had spent the last three nights with the defendant and he told her he loved her and he was breaking up with his old girlfriend as soon as the trial was over and they were gonna be together."

"Unbelievable." Chin shook his head. "Forget the obvious fact that she didn't see he was using her for an acquittal, why in the world would she think it was ok to start dating the defendant in the trial, and then admit it so easily to the judge?"

Danny's eyes sparkled and his grin widened.

This was his favorite part of the whole story.

"The defense attorney was a good guy. He questioned me in court a few times. He was fair and never took any cheap shots. But he was a bit of a free spirit. Long hair, long beard, rumpled suit," Danny explained. "But of course he had his client all cleaned up for court. Fresh haircut. Nice suit."

Danny paused, savoring every minute of the upcoming revelation.

"Turns out this juror thought the knucklehead was a lawyer and the public defender was the one on trial."

Kono barked a laugh. "Didn't she wonder why the defendant was questioning the witnesses?"

"Apparently not," Danny said.

"Really makes you worry about how much some jurors pay attention," Steve chuckled.

"How did it all end?" Chin asked.

"The judge declared a mistrial obviously. Knucklehead ended up taking a plea and getting 4 years. Juror got a year suspended for interfering with a court process. I have no idea what happened to the girlfriend," Danny said.

"Well hopefully nothing like that is gonna happen tomorrow," Chin said. "I'm just gonna go in, wrap up my testimony and be out in under 10 minutes. Smooth sailing."

Kono cringed. "Don't say that. You probably just jinxed yourself."

Chin laughed. "There's no girlfriend on the witness list so I think we're safe."

"There's a mom though, isn't there?" Steve asked. "And wasn't she the one that threw a poke bowl on you to try and distract you from looking under the porch where her son was hiding?"

"Better buckle up, buddy," Danny snorted. "You never know what's gonna happen next."

THE END

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