Shinichi let out an unusually long yawn, all along with his tears that escaped the sides of his eyes. The way he stretched his mouth was too wide that even his palm failed to hide it. Sleepy was the only word he could use to describe his morning today. Despite how strong the coffee Ai had prepared for him, his brain didn't seem to be fully awaken by the caffeine at all.
"You'll be late if you don't get moving, Tantei-san." Ai warned him of the ticking clock as her hands were moving deftly helping him make a knot for his tie.
His eyes fell unto the strawberry blonde before him, studying every expressions she was showing on her face. She was looking as fresh and stunning as usual with her school uniform hugging her figure decently. And she was looking as calm as she was on any other days; the total opposite of him who was utterly worn out– both his outer appearance and his inner soul.
No one to blame for that but his own inanity for spending the whole night wide awake. All was because the things Sonoko revealed yesterday afternoon won't leave him alone. It kept resonating inside his head, pressing him to think to himself. In the end, the fact that her admission had his resolve crumbled to pieces only pulled his head deeper into a mess to the point that it was straining him away from his sleep.
After all, he and Ai both had agreed to keep their marriage as it was. He couldn't have violated what they had decided together one-sidedly simply because he selfishly had a change of mind, could he?
"You're good to go now." Ai said, patting his upper chest once she was done taking care his tie.
She let her hands lingered on him for a short second, like always. A small hint of blush was decorating her cheeks. He found nothing weird about her at all up to this very moment, until he caught a glance of her bare left ring finger.
Where was her ring?
He was going to ask her that, though her attention was shifted toward Chiharu who also needed her assistance to get ready for the day. She quickly retrieved her hands and strode down to where their daughter was; his eyes followed her. He missed his chance.
"You're such an airhead, are you not?" Yukiko commented, startling him. It turned out she was standing behind the counter all along, drinking her tea while watching the young couple from the corner of her rolled eyes– especially his pathetic son.
"W-what is it?" Shinichi stuttered, feeling his mom's stare drilled a hole on his head. Yukiko sighed.
"Don't you ever heard of a saying 'it is the man who makes the choice, and the woman makes the judgement?"
It was his turn this time to roll his eyes at her seem-to-be another nonsense utterance. He believed he heard an imaginary crow squawking flying across their heads as silence overwhelmed the two of them.
Some veins popped up on Yukiko's skull a second later. She was exasperated at her son's dumb response. If only her position allowed her to be so blunt in this situation, she might have taken this matter into her own hands again, like what she had done to them on the day of the New Year.
She could do nothing this time around, regrettably. The uncertainty that was clouding her son's eyes since last night told her that this was a problem that only him alone could solve. Even so, how old was he exactly to be this experienceless with romance?
"What I'm saying is that Ai-chan is waiting for you to make your move, duh." Yukiko explained, poking her forefinger at his chest. "You should've known by now that she always looks up on you whenever she makes her decisions, don't you? If you are wavering, then who else could she lean on to?"
Shinichi went quiet yet again. It was unlooked-for that his mom's words would sink into his mind, unlike the one before. And the more he brooded over it, the more his heart stung.
Ah, right. He said to himself. This is her we are talking about.
He must've grown beyond accustomed to her wonted performance to have forgotten for a moment that she loved to keep things to herself. He should've understood without asking that her taking off her ring must have meant something more than what was seen.
Was it to remind him to pull himself together and stick to the conclusion they had talked out during their visit to Ran's grave? So essentially speaking, the diamond ring indeed had no longer fulfilled its purpose since things between them won't progress to anywhere. What difference did it make if she wore it then?
An unsettling feeling stirred within him upon realizing this; an ache that he didn't know how to deal with. A buried pain that he didn't discern he had entitled to sear his heart. Then as if to rub salt into his wound, Heiji's astonishing wedding invitation arrived at their mailbox several days later.
"Did you guys get the letter?" Genta asked with so much unusual seriousness in his voice. Ayumi and Mitsuhiko nodded simultaneously, taking a big gulp of their nervousness. "Then show it on count of three. One– Two–"
On the late afternoon, the day the invitation came, Shinichi went home surprised to find the three teenagers sitting in a circle on the floor of his living room. They were still in their uniform, a sign that they just got back from school. Instead of going to their respective houses, they gathered here in his, discussing things that sounded trifling.
"–Three!"
They took their hands out at the same time, each was holding a letter that had the same design. Anyone could guess those letters were from the same sender obviously. They were laughing thereafter, delighted and giddy. Chiharu was also laughing with them while sitting on Ayumi's lap.
"What are you so excited about?" Loosening his tie, Shinichi came to approach them.
He was instantly welcomed by the running Chiharu and the detective boy's loud greetings. He squatted down to pat the little girl's head and to see what those three teenagers had been up to.
"It's this– Ta-da!" They showed their invitations straight to his face.
"A letter?" Shinichi took one of the envelopes and began to scan it.
"Look at the sender's name. It's Heiji-niichan and Kazuha-neesan's wedding!" Ayumi exclaimed. "We are all invited to Osaka."
"And since the date is a few days after our graduation, we are thinking of having our graduation trip there as well." Mitsuhiko added. "We're here to plan it all out together."
"We should list those foods we hadn't got to try during our field trip last year." Genta began to droll, imagining all the local culinary he could find there. He got a light scolding from the other two, like always.
Watching their merry mood as they took out a pen and laid out some papers, Shinichi curled his lips. Since when did his house become their basecamp?
"Yours is on the table beside the sofa, Tantei-san." Ai's voice pulled him back to Earth. Turning his head, he saw her enter the room, holding a tray of mugs in her hands. His mom followed suit with another tray of snacks.
"Ah, thanks." He stuttered a little.
His eyes pursued her for some reason, unknowingly observing every nick of her gestures and expressions as she arranged the drinks on the coffee table. It was as if he was searching for something out of her appearance. Something that he himself wasn't sure what.
His heart almost jolted out of his chest when her eyes shifted to his direction; her blue orbs were holding his dark blue ones still. Like a thief that was caught red-handed stealing, he briskly broke their eye contact, flustered at his own conduct.
"Hey, Shinichi-oniichan." He heard Genta call his name hanging. "Does it mean you're the only old bachelor left among your friends?"
Everyone went silent at the plump boy's innocent-yet-unanticipated question. It was Yukiko first who broke into tears in response to him. Her faking tears, to be exact.
"You see, I've always wanted to see my daughter-in-law wearing the wedding dress we choose together one day." She recited the old classic dialogue, adding fuel to the fire. "But looking at my hopeless son, I don't think it'd be soon."
"Don't say that, Yukiko-san." Ayumi responded, getting lugged by the superb acting skill of the legendary retired actress.
"Even though he's a mystery maniac, I'm sure romance would come for him too." Mitsuhiko said with so much assurance. He was also getting drawn by Yukiko's acting.
"Oi-oi. Are you trying to be sympathetic or sarcastic?" Shinichi cringed at their teasing while the rest were back at laughing hearing his retort.
Still, he had to admit that his fellow detective friend had indeed made an expeditious move here. It hadn't been a month since he was told about his engagement, and he already received his wedding invitation today. It won't be long before he'd get to hear him brag on his child's omiyamairi photos, perhaps.
Surrounded by their gleeful noises, Shinichi's scrutiny was drawn to the distinctive chuckle of his wife. He heedlessly stole a glance at her, eyeing her again subtly so she won't notice him staring this time. And he wondered what she was probably thinking when she read the invitation letter– what she might envisage when she listened to his mom's quip.
He felt like a total jerk all of a sudden.
Hence, like the spring wind that blew gently the budding Sakura trees, so did Shinichi's determination sway and is left undecided.
.
.
.
Graduation day, as all people knew it, was a day that marked the end of what was seemed to be everything. Unlike the one they had in the middle school, high school graduation was filled with tears more than laughter. Those tears mostly came from the juniors who were sending their favourite seniors off; some came from the graduates who were bidding their goodbyes to one another.
For they knew that their worlds wouldn't be the same once they stepped out of the school ground today.
Though as saddening as it was, they let themselves indulged in the euphoria of wearing their uniform for the last time.
The detective boys too didn't let this moment slip away as they took as many pictures and videos as they could for their keepsakes. They dragged Ai into all of those, of course. Yukiko wasn't acting much different in this case.
Being the fill-in for the Professor who was stuck on the contractual agreement with the company he was partnering with, Yukiko won't leave her daughter-in-law alone without getting a single nice shot of her. Not until she was satisfied capturing her from various angles, at least. This was one of those precious unreturning life milestones that she must keep in the album, she reasoned. The Professor and Fusae would want one printed and framed for their living room too.
Having no more excuse, the shrunken scientist bared a soft smile on her face and let them do as they wished.
Only for today, she thought.
Some underclassmen who happened to see that couldn't stop their hearts from melting. That rare smile of hers was indeed a gift bestowed upon them on the very last day before she left for college. Moreover, with the congratulatory bouquets of flowers they had just given her on her hands, she looked exactly like a goddess. They made sure to imprint the view into their brains.
The queue of students who wanted to present Ai their flower bouquet and those who wanted to admire her from a short distance was almost endless. But there also stood another crowd of students, a few meters beside them, that was much more countless. It consisted mostly of females though.
Those female students were flocking around a boy who was now known as the former soccer captain of the school, Yuuto. It was nothing new for a guy such as him to have some girls fighting over the second button of his uniform– a graduation day's tradition that never died and was always to be expected.
"Yuuto-kun sure is popular, isn't he?" Ayumi commented. The other two boys nodded in agreement.
"Yuuto-kun?" Yukiko pried.
"Hmn, it's that guy over there. He reminds me a lot of Conan-kun." Ayumi explained, a blush of admiration appeared on her face. "If Conan-kun were here, he might've been the school soccer captain and be as popular as him between the girls."
"Heh, is that so?" Yukiko answered with a heap of amusement. She would keep musing over the boy if it wasn't for her phone's vibration distracted her. Checking the incoming message, she smirked. "It's Shin-chan. He said he's already here."
She informed the detective boys who became gleaming with anticipation for the detective's arrival. After all, they had made him promise to buy them some gifts for their commencement. They ripped off Shinichi's wallet with their expensive wishlist items.
However, their focus were back on Yuuto as they heard cries of disappointment broke among those flocking girls all of a sudden. Shinichi who had just joined them also marveled at the ruckus. Then they saw the boy, with a playful apologetic smile, refused to give his button to them. What surprised them more was when he moved his feet to the direction of a certain strawberry blonde.
The commotion was ceased instantly while his steps were full of confidence, splitting the groups of folks to give him way to reach her spot. Every eyes were on him, though he didn't waver at all. He had set his mind.
"Haibara-san." Yuuto called her. "Give me your hand, please."
At the sudden call of her name, Ai turned her heels and instinctively showed her free hand as instructed. Questions were all over her look. Then before she knew it, Yuuto stretched his right arm out and dropped something onto her palm.
It was his button– the legendary second button of his uniform.
"I want you to have this." He said, slightly blushing. "I'll be going to Europe to pursue my studies, but I hope we would still be in touch."
Cheers and wails were coming back from the audience all at once, provoking a racket that was a lot louder than the one they threw minutes ago.
Realizing Yuuto's scheme, Mitsuhiko and Genta put on their annoyed looks almost immediately. They pulled him apart from Ai, intimidating him for having some nerve. Their sense of knighthood was aroused to protect their childhood girl friend from any wolfs that might prey her.
Meanwhile, Ayumi was amused at how surreal the scene was, which she only got to see in the movies, played before her. She was excited for her best friend who had just received a direct open confession for the first time in her life.
The said best friend, however, said nothing for the matter. Instead, she clasped her lips so hard into a thin line; a flabbergasted troubled look accompanied by light shades of red dye was clearly transpired on her face. She wasn't sure how she was supposed to react to this.
The detective and the ex-actress were both surprised, although the latter ended up giggling her lungs out as she witnessed the changing expressions her daughter-in-law manifested.
"Oh my, that boy sure has guts." She commented, leering her eyes to her son. "Unlike a certain someone here."
Shinichi could only laugh dryly both at her remark and at the rigorous commotion. As far as he knew, he didn't come here, rushing after finishing all his reports for the day, to watch his wife get confessed by the boy whom he thought had long settled their rivalry. So, what was that nuisance doing now?
He hurriedly gulped his irritated mood down his throat before he could feed his disgust further. He didn't want to ruin the day only because of this trivial thing. Little did he know though, that this insecurity he sensed would surface once again as soon as he entered their bedroom tonight.
There he stood on the door sill with his towel hung around his neck, hair still wet from the shower he had just took, and eyes burning with dismay from watching Ai's mesmerized look. What piqued him more was the fact that she had been sitting on her side of their bed since who knew how long; and in the palm of her hand was a blazer button that obviously didn't belong to him.
While the way her soft cheeks flushed a little was supposed to be cute in his opinion, he disliked it when he wasn't the one who made her put that kind of sweet look on.
"Could you please stop staring at that thing already?" He said, sulking as he walked closing in.
Aware of his pouty mouth, she teased him back with a smirk.
"What? Can't I look at what's given to me as much as I want?" She deliberately threw a sneer.
His scowl deepened at her playful remark. What was so special with that button anyway? He had given her so much more valuable gifts, both in terms of sincerity and moneywise, many times before. Let's say her engagement ring? Yet, here she was, admiring a cheap present she got from another guy.
A pang of jealousy hit him hard in his chest as a reminder struck him that the ring he bought for her had actually lost its worth. He supposed it served nothing more than those mere jewelries sitting in her accessories collection now. Without him realizing, his hand had already moved to touch her fingers and forcefully pushed them to fold her palm into a fist. He clenched her small curled hand in his, trapping the button under two layers of their grasps.
Confused by his sudden quirk, Ai looked up to him only to meet his darkened midnight blue orbs and his serious frown. The hurt reflected in his eyes took her breath straight away.
"Ai…" He muttered, stopping his sentence midway.
'Where is your ring?' was what he wanted to ask– the exact same one that he wanted to ask some mornings ago. But something with the way her gaze penetrated his soul dared him to quit it. Perhaps, he had become a coward.
A long stretch of silence occupied the room, anxiety began to seep into her bone. The longer she waited for him to finish, the uneasier she got. In the midst of their echoing heartbeats, she felt his grip on her hand loosened and saw his facial expression weakened.
"…if you are fond of buttons that much, I have a lot of spares in the drawer." He said with an impish smile.
His words dropped the tension in the air, leaving Ai dumbfounded of the unspoken suddenty. It took her some seconds for her brain to process the situation before she could retort back to him. She was all flustered whereas he kept getting under her skin with his half-witted giggle.
Not paying much attention to her riposte, he sneaked his empty hand to her jaw, caressed it gently and tugged her forward. He settled his lips on her forehead, shutting her up promptly with his proximity. Her lost of words did her nothing good but a chance for him to continue down to her nose. She squeezed her eyes tight as his hot breath tickled her face.
Pulling out slightly, he saw her adorable flushed cheeks betray her death glare. He chuckled just then before he proceeded to her lips. She melted soon after, scraping everything else aside as she responded back to his kiss.
"Say, why don't we make use of your uniform for the very last time?" He sighed against her, pushing her to fall back on the mattress. The bed creaked as he climbed slowly hovering over her. His knees were strangling her thighs, blocking any of her escape routes.
One or two water droplets trickled down his black hair, wetting the bed sheet where her strawberry blonde hair sprawled. Reaching out to the towel around his neck, she pulled it to ruffle his hair dry, coincidentally luring him closer than he already was.
"Pervert detective." She whispered a scornful comment, though her sweet smile, her whimpering voice, and her actions proved the opposites.
The button in her hand had long fallen to the floor rolling, but no one seemed to care. For his fingers slipping in between her palm was too much preoccupying them. And so, in the middle of this early spring night, they let themselves indulged in the pleasure of their exchanged heat once more.
A whole lot of reliefs flooded Shinichi for he managed to refrain himself from saying his distressing mind out loud. He was on the verge of trespassing a sort of an invisible line that she drew, only because he was burned with childish jealousy. If it wasn't for her eyes telling him the otherwise, he might've failed to suppress his rooting compulsion.
Truth be told, it assuaged Ai when he seemed to recognize her stress. He backed off even without her pleading, and that was enough to give her space for her perturbed emotions. After all, she understood that he'd notice her missing ring and that sooner or later, the moment would come eventually for him to ask her a question about it. Be that as it may, she sensed a wave of guilt kicked into her collided conscience upon discerning how much pain she had caused him.
Albeit, what was she suppose to do to explain everything?
How was she suppose to tell him that she had learned her lesson enough to not risk all her hopes on the uncertainty? How was she suppose to say that she couldn't stand watching him oscillating between his own dilemma? So until he could decide what he truly wanted to do on his own accord, she dared not hang on her pipedream– her ring.
At the end of the day, whichever his decision would be;
whatever her hidden concerns were;
they were doing alright in spite of the lack of the vow in their marriage, weren't they?
For the worst part, it was what they held in silence to convince themselves.
Author's note: Finally, I uploaded another chapter (yay). I know I haven't been updating this fic for three months, more or less– I'm sooo sorry and thanks for those who waits– but I'll finish this fic and that's for sure (good luck me). We are almost reaching the final part anyway, maybe a few chapters left before it ends, so yeah…
I do hope you still enjoy reading this story of mine, and as always all reviews and comments are welcomed. Happy reading!
Disclaimer: All characters of Detective Conan are belong to Aoyama Gosho. I don't own any single of them.