Follow Your Heart – The Cook Chronicles

Chapter 12 – Happy Anniversary

May 10, 1874

Dear Ma,

The college held graduation, which means I'm a second-year medical student! I can hardly believe it's been a year already since Andrew and I left Colorado Springs. Somehow it seems both a short time ago and a long time ago.

Even though there aren't any lectures this month there's still plenty to do. There's the work at the hospital of course, and besides that we conduct the inventories of the chemical lab and dispensary and report what needs to be ordered to Amanda. Now that we're advanced students, we get to do dissections on our own without Andrew's supervision and can assist with surgeries. Just last week Dr. Cleveland performed an ovariotomy. The tumor was much larger than the one you showed me from Myra's surgery. I understand now how something so big makes a woman think she's pregnant instead of sick.

We're also organizing the reception for the new matriculants. Amanda arranges the food for that since she knows how many girls will be coming. She said it's a smaller number than last year because fewer girls applied. We were all sorry to hear that because five girls have already left! Mary Beth was one of them. She said her father lost too much money when the stock market crashed last fall and that she needs to find a teaching position to earn enough money to be able to matriculate again. I know the college offers help (Deborah is here on a scholarship), but Amanda said that they don't have the means to help every girl who needs it. I'm lucky that Andrew doesn't invest in the stock market (he feels it's too risky) and his bank hasn't closed like others have.

I haven't told you yet about the biggest change here: Dr. C. resigned as dean. Amanda wasn't surprised because she thought Dr. C. was working too hard, but it surprised everyone else. She isn't leaving the college completely; she's staying on as Professor of Obstetrics and Diseases of Women, so I'll have classes with her this coming year. The board of corporators asked Miss Bodley to replace her. The girls think she was chosen because she's not married and doesn't have as many obligations as Dr. C. does, so they probably feel she'll be able to do the job longer. Dr. C. was dean for only two years, but Dr. Preston did it for six years before that. We had a long talk about how unfair it is, that it's easier for men to do so many jobs at once, but then Hannah said, 'At least the board didn't pick a man to be dean. Let's be thankful that they recognized a woman's college should be run by a woman.' Nobody could argue with that.

Please give Katie a big hug from me on her birthday. I hate to miss it again, but I know I'm where I'm supposed to be.

All my love,

Colleen

:

As the days crept closer to May 16, Colleen looked for signs that her husband remembered the significance of the date.

Not that she could tell.

Andrew talked about his work at the hospital, of course, and there was general talk with Amanda during breakfast and supper about things in the daily news, but he gave no indication whatsoever that the upcoming third Saturday of May was particularly noteworthy.

A few days before their anniversary, Colleen and Deborah had been assigned to tidy up the operating room after a procedure. Colleen was wiping a scalpel dry and inadvertently cut herself on the blade. She hissed in pain. "Ah!"

"Colleen?"

"It's nothing," Colleen reported, setting the instrument down and hurrying over to the washbasin to clean the wound. "Just a stupid cut."

Deborah went back to her own cleaning before hearing her friend call out again.

"Oh… dang it!" Colleen promptly dropped to the floor in search of the bar of soap.

"I'll help you—"

"I don't need your help!" Colleen interjected irritably. All went still as she knelt there, stunned. "Oh, Deborah… I'm sorry, I didn't mean…" She couldn't finish the sentence, biting her lip to fight off the tears.

Deborah sank down to the floor to sit with her friend but said nothing. She put a hand on Colleen's arm in support.

"It's Andrew," Colleen said with a sniffle. "I think… I think he's forgotten our anniversary."

"Dr. Cook is very considerate. He wouldn't forget a thing like that."

"I thought he was different, but I asked him this morning if we'd be doing anything on Saturday, and he said, 'Well, I thought you'd be with your friends, but if you want, we could go on a picnic. Should be good weather for it.'"

"A picnic sounds nice."

"But don't you see, he didn't even think of it until then. He thinks it's an ordinary Saturday. If he had remembered our anniversary, he would have planned something special like going out to a fancy dinner."

Deborah looked thoughtful. "Well… how do you know he's not planning on doing something like that and keeping it a surprise?"

"I… I didn't think of that."

"Obviously… look, I can't say if Dr. Cook has any plans beyond a picnic, but really, Colleen, the way he cares about you, I wouldn't fret if your anniversary has slipped his mind. Actually, you should be hoping there won't be an emergency Saturday to spoil your day."

With a start, Colleen remembered back to her birthday, how Andrew had had to watch as a young boy died despite his best efforts. How could she be so self-centered? "You're right. I'm being stupid and petty." She held up her finger and assumed the tone of a professor. "It's still bleeding. Would you bandage it for me, Miss Williams?"

"I'd be happy too, Mrs. Cook – as soon as we find the soap."

:

Saturday morning the sun rose with a few wispy clouds. It promised to be a picture-perfect day – a picnic weather day.

Colleen woke up and began getting dressed - quietly, for Andrew was still sleeping.

She'd had a change of perspective after her talk with Deborah and decided that no matter what unfolded the rest of today – picnic or not, special dinner or not - she would at least get it off to a special start by making breakfast for her husband. She was now as proficient in Amanda's kitchen as she had been back home in Colorado Springs and had persuaded the older woman to let her do the cooking solo this morning. Rather than tell her the real reason, however, Colleen had simply said that Amanda worked really hard and that she deserved a break now and then, which was true enough. For if Andrew had truly forgotten what day it was, then Colleen didn't want their landlady to make him feel guilty about it with a cheerful happy anniversary - or worse, a pointed did you forget something?

"Good morning," she said, seeing her husband's eyes open.

"Good morning. Did I forget that you have hospital duty this morning?" Andrew asked, seeing his wife already out of bed. Though she typically awoke first, Colleen would often remain in bed so as not to disturb him, unless she had morning hospital duty or a test to study for. Seeing as how there were no tests this month, service at the hospital was the only logical conclusion.

No, you didn't forget that. "I wanted to make cookies for our picnic today, and I thought I'd might as well make us breakfast, too. Give Amanda a little break," she explained in a rush, buttoning up her bodice.

He pushed back the covers and sat up to stretch his arms. "That's thoughtful of you, but you don't need to go through the trouble, Colleen. We can pick something up from the bakery."

"But I want to." Colleen stepped closer to his side of the bed. "I'll make your favorite, gingerbread."

He couldn't help but smile and reached for her hand. "Well, how can I say no to that?" Andrew gave her hand a quick kiss before getting to his feet. "Do you mind meeting me at the hospital later? I promised Ben I'd cover any surgeries for him this morning."

"Sure," Colleen agreed amicably. She watched Andrew head off for the water closet as she continued getting ready.

Later, once breakfast was over and Andrew had left for work, Colleen set about baking cookies while Amanda did the Saturday wash. Though her tenants sent out their clothes for cleaning to save her time, there were still the linens and her own items to clean. After hanging everything on the clothesline out back, Amanda returned to the kitchen to prepare a shopping list, the unmistakable aroma of gingerbread in the air. It made the older woman a bit nostalgic, fondly recalling baking cookies for her own husband and children. The Cooks didn't have children yet. Though she never pried into their private affairs, Amanda understood the how and why of that – and privately agreed that waiting until Colleen earned her degree was the most sensible thing to do.

Amanda's departure for the market left Colleen alone in the house. The young woman had a bit of time to kill after setting the cookies out to cool, so she headed back upstairs to tidy their room. Not to say that it was customarily untidy, but once a week it required sweeping and dusting in addition to the usual bedmaking, and once a month the rug got a pounding, too.

It was during the dusting that Colleen's eyes inevitably landed upon a picture frame sitting on the dresser - their wedding photograph. Andrew had walked right past it this morning, not giving it a second thought. Now, however, Colleen picked it up and sat on the bed, staring at it as the memories came flooding back…

Visiting the graveyard to share the day with her real Ma and Becky and Aunt Marjorie. The excitement of getting dressed, of doing up her hair and putting on the veil. Walking with Sully up the aisle and seeing Andrew waiting for her. Saying their vows. The feel of Andrew slipping the ring on her finger. Their soft kiss in the church. Posing for this very photograph...

With a heavy sigh, Colleen returned the photo to the dresser to finish her cleaning. Maybe Deborah's right - maybe he's still planning a surprise for tonight.

Then again, maybe he wasn't. And that… that would be all right, too. Because at the end of the day, Andrew would be there, with her, and she with him. She would be forever in his heart, and he forever in hers… which is what really mattered more than remembering a date on a calendar.

Still… it stung just a little.

When her morning activities were over, it was to change. She'd worn her gray paisley this morning, but she needed something a little more stylish for going out to picnic in the park. There was her blue Gilda dress, but Colleen decided to set that aside in favor of the red. It wasn't as fancy as the blue, and was starting to show its age, but it held sentimental value - for it was the dress she'd been wearing during their first kiss. Andrew probably didn't remember what she'd been wearing that day (men generally didn't pay attention to things like that), but no matter. It was special to her - special to them - whether Andrew remembered it or not.

Colleen smoothed her hair and fastened her white hat on her head just so. Dainty earbobs and a pair of white kid gloves completed the look. Satisfied, she returned to the kitchen and wrapped five cookies (two for her and three for Andrew) in a napkin, placing the small bundle in a picnic basket (the rest of their lunch they'd be picking up in town). She grabbed her reticule and knitted shawl (probably not needed, but in case it grew cool in the shade), and a blanket to sit on, before exiting the house, locking the door behind her with the key Andrew had left with her.

A short time later, Colleen saw that Maggie Pearce had pulled reception desk duty. "Maggie."

Her classmate knew exactly why she was there. "Colleen. Dr. Cook said he needed to get something from the college and would be right back."

"Thanks."

Colleen took a seat in the waiting area. After a few minutes, though, she grew restless. What was keeping him? She decided to find out, gathering her things to leave. With any luck, she'd meet him outside headed this way.

Alas, there was still no sign of him. Still, there were a couple of possibilities: he'd become engrossed in a journal article, or had gotten to talking to Mr. Brown, the school janitor, or another one of the professors who had stopped in this day…

Colleen climbed the short steps to the college and opened the door.

"Happy Anniversary!" came a loud chorus of female voices, accompanied by several giggles.

In front of Colleen, crowding the lobby area, stood two dozen members of her class. "Oh, this is so nice of you." She addressed Deborah. "Was this your idea?"

"If you hadn't cut your finger, I don't think I would have been able to keep a straight face," Deborah replied, dodging the question. "How is it, by the way?"

"Fine. I had a good friend take care of it."

Deborah smiled. "Well, maybe you should have a doctor take a look at it, just to make sure." Tilting her head, she indicated someone behind Colleen, and before she turned around, Colleen knew who would be there.

He hadn't forgotten!

Andrew stood there with Lucy Walker in front. He nudged the girl forward.

"I'm your flower girl," Lucy announced proudly, offering a single red rose to Colleen.

Though she appreciated the gesture, the nineteen-year-old knew the flower would mean more to the child. "You keep it, Lucy. It's not every day a man gives you flowers." She leaned down to whisper in the girl's ear. "It means he's sweet on you."

Lucy looked back at Andrew, then at Colleen. She shook her head. "Nah. You got him first."

The assembled women giggled at this this observation, and even Andrew chuckled.

"Maybe you're right. But I still want you to keep it." Lucy threw her arms around Colleen in a hug of thanks.

"Do I get a hug, too?" asked Andrew.

What Colleen really wanted to do was rush into his arms, the way Dr. Mike had rushed into Sully's arms after returning from Boston. But she refrained from such a zealous public display for Andrew's sake, as they were on college property, and he needed to maintain some professional decorum. Plus, she wanted to get back at him a little bit. "For making me think you'd forgotten?"

"I'm sorry about that, Colleen, but it would have ruined the surprise. Speaking of which, we still have a picnic to get to."

Frances brought Andrew his medical bag and hat, while Hannah took the picnic basket from Colleen. "I'll take that."

"But-"

"But you won't be needing it," said Deborah, handing her a different, heavier basket.

Colleen got the picture - Andrew had already pre-planned their lunch. No wonder he'd resisted this morning when she said she'd be making cookies!

"Shall we, Mrs. Cook?" Andrew asked, extending his elbow.

"Yes… thanks everyone, this was a wonderful surprise," she called out before taking Andrew's arm. Calls of bye and have a good time and happy anniversary echoed behind them as they exited the college.

The women disbursed, chatting about their successful surprise. Deborah escorted Lucy home.

Frances sighed dramatically. "Too bad he's an only child."

:

A horse and buggy were waiting for Colleen and Andrew at the curb. "The driver left," said Colleen, worried, looking up and down the street.

"Actually, you're looking at him," Andrew replied with a grin.

"You rented a buggy?"

"This is not an ordinary day, and this is no ordinary picnic." He set the blanket and his bag inside, took the basket from Colleen to place that inside as well, and assisted her up before getting in himself.

"I can't believe the whole school knew but me," she said once Andrew had set the horse on its way.

"That was the hardest part of today's preparations, keeping everything from you. Deborah almost spoiled the surprise, that day you were in the operating theater."

"What about Lucy?"

"We waited as long as we could before including her." He shook his head. "I don't seem to have much luck in giving you flowers. Guess I should quit while I'm behind."

"What do you mean?"

Andrew explained to her about the time he'd tried to ask her to the Sweetheart's Dance, only to find Colleen and Becky deep in conversation. He hadn't the heart to come between the two friends and had offered the yellow rose to the first woman who'd come along instead, Mrs. Nielsen.

"So that's why she picked you when it was ladies' choice," remarked Colleen, now having a more complete picture of that week's events.

"She's not a very good dancer; I was afraid she was going to step on my toes."

"But Becky and I wouldn't cut in. You hadn't asked either one of us to the dance, so we danced together instead."

"Yes, I guess I deserved that. At least you had a good time."

"We did," Colleen agreed wistfully. She rarely thought of Becky anymore. School occupied the majority of her time, and she'd made so many new friends, there wasn't a need to. Funny how things changed in a year...

Sensing her reflective mood, Andrew fell silent as well. They didn't have to keep up steady conversation. Sometimes just being together was enough.

It wasn't long, though, before Colleen noted that Andrew was bypassing Fairmount Park. He wasn't headed toward any of the other city parks she was familiar with either. "Where are we going?"

"Ah, I told you this was no ordinary picnic. We're headed to a place called Wissahickon Valley. It used to be Indian land until settlers arrived. Several acres were owned by William Penn himself. There's a timber mill in there now, but it's also used by people wanting to get away from the city for a few hours, like us."

The buildings and paved roads of Philadelphia gave way to lush green areas full of woodlands and wagon-wheel trails. Their buggy seemed to be on the main travel way, as they occasionally passed other carriages and riders on horseback traveling the opposite direction. After a while Colleen heard running water, indicating the presence of a creek or river.

Andrew directed the horse onto a faint side trail headed more directly into the forest canopy. Finally, he drew the horse to stop beside the creek so that it could drink leisurely after the long trip. Absolutely no one else was in sight, and not likely to find them, either, unless they turned off at the exact same place in the road. If Colleen didn't know any better, she could almost swear she was back in the woods of Colorado.

Andrew stepped out of the buggy and helped Colleen down. "Alone at last," he said, and before she could respond he was kissing her. He would never dare kiss her like this on a picnic in the city where someone could spot them. It just wasn't proper. Here, though, were miles of solitude, and propriety be damned. "I've been waiting to do that all morning, ever since you offered to make me cookies," he said after coming up for air, gazing into her eyes. "But you are worth waiting for."

Colleen grew warm at his compliment. "Yet you couldn't wait to marry me. I seem to remember that happening really fast."

He chuckled. "Guilty as charged. Though you were just as eager to marry me."

"Guilty as charged," she echoed. "So, now that we've agreed that we were equally eager to get married, can we agree it's time to eat?"

"You won't get an argument from me." He left his hat and medical bag in the buggy, retrieving the picnic basket and blanket. "Choose your spot," he instructed, handing her the latter item.

She did so, easing herself down before removing her hat and gloves, setting them out of the way on one corner of the blanket. Andrew knelt beside her.

"Let's see," he said, reaching into the basket. He pulled out two napkins and handed one to Colleen. "First, a toast." He retrieved two glasses and a jar. "Freshly squeezed lemonade. Well, it was fresh when it was made earlier," he joked before pouring each of them a glass. The young doctor wasn't much for speeches, so he kept it simple. "To my beautiful wife, on our first anniversary. May it be the first of many." He clinked her glass before taking a sip.

Colleen took a sip of lemonade.

"And now, for the pièce de résistance," he said, imitating a slight French accent. He pulled their lunch from the basket and unveiled it. "Grace's meatloaf sandwich."

"Grace's meatloaf… really, Andrew," Colleen complained. "That's not fair. I mean, I know what you're trying to do, but you know that's not Grace's meatloaf."

"Actually, yes. It is," Andrew corrected her, handing her half. "I sent her a telegram asking if I could get an advance copy of the recipe, since I didn't want to risk the cookbook not arriving in time."

Colleen was stunned, looking at the sandwich anew. "This is really her recipe? But who made it?"

"Amanda, of course. When you thought she'd gone to the market, she came to the hospital to use the kitchen."

"Amanda… was in on this, too?"

"Why do you think she was so amiable to letting you cook this morning?" he asked in return, immensely enjoying the look on her face. "Go ahead. Tell me if it's the genuine article."

Without further prompting, Colleen took a bite. She started to chew, and her eyes widened. She swallowed. "It's… heavenly." She looked at Andrew lovingly. "Thank you, Andrew."

"My pleasure. You know what this means, don't you?"

Colleen shook her head, as her mouth was already full of another bite.

"It means…" he paused dramatically, as he didn't want her to accidentally choke, "that Tuesday nights can be meatloaf night again."

"Andrew…" Colleen admonished half-heartedly because she was too busy laughing. Truthfully, it sounded wonderful, to have this little slice of home again on a regular basis. Home. That's just what this picnic was all about. The buggy ride, the woods, Grace's meatloaf… Andrew had gone through a lot of trouble for her sake, to make her feel right at home, knowing she couldn't have the real thing. "This entire day was your idea?"

"Well, not everything... I knew our anniversary was coming up. I thought of taking you out to dinner and dancing, as I know you like to dance. Then your friends Hannah and Deborah approached me. I think they were looking out for you - afraid I would forget. I couldn't blame them for being concerned. Unfortunately, doctors have a reputation for missing important events. They're good friends, Colleen. I'm glad you have them.

"But getting back to the story… I told them my plans, and they said, as a first anniversary, that I should make it more special, like plan a surprise. I said I was open to suggestions, and that's when the idea of a special picnic started, going someplace we could be alone for a few hours. One of the local girls recommended this valley. That meant renting the buggy. And your friends wanted to be a part of it, too, since they'd helped to plan everything. The most difficult part was acting like I hadn't planned anything at all for today, in order to surprise you."

Andrew looked at her then with love in his eyes. Colleen returned the look, and slowly leaned in. That's all the encouragement Andrew needed, and he, too, leaned in to kiss her tenderly on the mouth a few times.

"Mmm… you taste of meatloaf," she teased.

"As do you."

Colleen took a sip of lemonade, then said, "Wait a minute. My favorite sandwich. My favorite drink… do you have my favorite pie for dessert?"

Andrew had been hoping she would remember their private joke and was pleased to be able to provide the punch line. "Pie for dessert? I think not. If I'm remembering correctly…" He turned toward the picnic basket and brought out a napkin sack, "…your favorite dessert is…"

"Oatmeal cookies!" they said in unison.

"Oh, Andrew… I love you."

"I love you, too, Colleen." This time Andrew didn't wait for a prompt and leaned in to resume the kissing. Before long, he had his hand at her back, lowering her to the blanket and pressing himself against her side.

"What about dessert?" Colleen asked breathlessly.

"You have your favorite dessert, and I have mine," he replied suggestively, deploying the line he'd rehearsed.

-This is no ordinary picnic.

Colleen basked in her husband's attention. The fact that Andrew had gone through the effort to plan all this made her regret that she had ever doubted he would remember their anniversary. It made her feel loved and appreciated that he had made this day a special one, that he was now kissing her in this setting that was wide open and yet secluded at the same time. It was just the two of them, alone, taking a few minutes of their picnic to express warmth and affection for one another, something they'd never be able to do in one of the city's parks.

For his part, Andrew was relieved that the surprise had gone off without a hitch, and that he could now simply relax and enjoy this private time with his wife. It was a secret thrill for him, kissing her like this, something he'd never dare do on one of their regular picnics in Fairmount Park! He took his time, savoring the experience, as there was nowhere else that they needed to be, no outside demands on their time - and no one around to protest that it was indecent behavior. And though he had referred to their kissing as dessert, Andrew knew this was actually more of an appetizer. Tonight, they would move indoors, shed their clothes, and he'd be able to indulge in the full banquet of her body…

"Andrew?" Colleen asked hesitantly. She wasn't a mind reader, but the direction of her husband's thoughts was starting to become self-evident.

"Mmm…" he murmured distractedly.

"Andrew, you're, um… you're… you mean we're… you want to do that out here?" Colleen would never have believed it of her Boston-bred husband, and she found the idea surprisingly thrilling.

This time Andrew stopped to look at her, puzzled. "'Do that out…' Oh! You think this was leading to… that?"

"It's not?"

"No, darling, it's not." He half laughed; half coughed. "Well, not right now." Andrew shifted his position to prop himself up on one elbow, resting his free hand on her stomach. "I apologize if I misled you when I said this wasn't an ordinary picnic. Secluded as we might be at present, this is neither the time nor place to… to continue. Tonight, at home will be more appropriate."

"Oh."

To Andrew's ears, it sounded like she was disappointed. "Is something wrong, Colleen? Is it your monthly?" Its presence would certainly disrupt plans for continuing.

"No, it's not that." She hesitated before explaining, embarrassed. Even among people in the medical profession it remained a delicate topic. "I guess I'm a little confused. That you would get… that way, knowing you weren't going to… finish."

Now painfully self-aware, Andrew lamented how awkward his romantic interlude had become. No ordinary picnic indeed – this very discussion never would have happened on an ordinary picnic! He cleared his throat and eyed the matter objectively, which was the only way to handle such a sensitive subject. "Well, I… I suppose from your point of view it may seem strange, but um, it's just basic male physiology. Didn't Laura cover this in class?" he asked, referring to Colleen's physiology professor.

"Yes, but… well, isn't it atypical not to finish?"

"'Atypical?' Laura said that?"

"I… well… maybe not that word. Just that it's possible for a man to be interrupted, and not complete the act. You mean interruptions are common?"

"I- I wouldn't characterize it that way either," Andrew replied, frowning. "I suppose men simply take for granted that there will be certain times when it's... inconvenient to finish."

Colleen pondered it for a moment, coming up with a follow-up question. "Have you been… inconvenienced before?"

Oh, hell… Andrew looked away and scrubbed a hand down his face. Ordinarily, he loved discussing medicine with Colleen. It was their great mutual interest, and he'd thought that he could discuss any aspect with her no matter how delicate. Her inquiry, however, had shifted away from the general to the personal – the very personal. The twenty-seven-year-old had never intended to reveal this to her, yet there was no use in keeping it a secret any longer. "Remember last year, when we were kissing on the train?"

"You were aroused on the train?" Colleen couldn't believe it – she'd had no idea. Then again, in hindsight, the way they'd been seated next to each other would have allowed Andrew to hide his excited state from her.

"Every night. Which is why I was so eager to take you to bed when we arrived at the hotel. I suppose you could say I was highly motivated to finish what had been started on the train."

"So, when we're at home tonight… you'll be finishing what was started here?"

He took hold of her hand and rubbed the back of it with his thumb. "Absolutely. That is, if my beautiful wife is agreeable to the idea," he hinted.

Colleen's expression brightened. "Yes, I think she'd be agreeable."

He returned her smile, holding her gaze a moment at the thought of tonight. However, with the mood irretrievably lost, Andrew changed course to resume the picnic. "You were asking about dessert. I must warn you, Amanda didn't make these, since she was still at the house with you," he said, sitting up and retrieving the napkin sack. "They are Hannah's and Deborah's contribution."

"I'll risk it." She took a tentative bite. "Hmm. A little dry and crispy, but pretty good."

"You're lucky you didn't taste their first attempt. I wasn't about to let them give my wife food poisoning on our anniversary."

While they ate dessert and finished the lemonade, Andrew completed the recreation of their first picnic by pulling out a book of Sonnets by Shakespeare. "I hope you don't mind, I picked a different sonnet for today, number eighteen:

Shall I compare thee to a summer's day?

Thou art more lovely and more temperate:

Rough winds do shake the darling buds of May,

And summer's lease hath all too short a date;

Sometime too hot the eye of heaven shines,

And often is his gold complexion dimm'd;

And every fair from fair sometime declines,

By chance or nature's changing course untrimm'd;

But thy eternal summer shall not fade,

Nor lose possession of that fair thou ow'st;

Nor shall death brag thou wander'st in his shade,

When in eternal lines to time thou grow'st:

So long as men can breathe or eyes can see,

So long lives this, and this gives life to thee."

Colleen let the words and sentiment hang in the air before saying, "Thank you, Andrew."

He gave a bashful nod of acknowledgement and set the book down. "Can I interest you in a stroll along the creek, Mrs. Cook?"

"I'd love to, Dr. Cook."

Andrew stood and pulled Colleen to her feet. They walked along the edge of the water, Andrew occasionally moving a low-hanging branch out of their way. A squirrel darted up a tree. Neither of them said anything, simply enjoying each other's company and the natural beauty of the area.

They came to a spot with a large boulder and sat on it for a respite. Suddenly Colleen began untying her boots.

"Pebble in your shoe?" Andrew asked.

"Let's go wading."

"Wading?" he repeated uncertainly.

"Sure, it'll be fun. Don't worry, I won't start a water fight, I don't want to get my dress wet." She giggled and began to reminisce as she unlaced her shoes. "Though that can be fun, too. One time Jared dared me to go for a swim with my clothes on. He and Paul threw me in, and then all the kids jumped in and got their clothes wet." Grinning at the memory, Colleen glanced up at Andrew, who had made no move to remove his shoes. Her smile faltered at his expression. "Andrew… what's the matter?"

"Do you promise we won't go in very far?"

"Of course. I said I didn't want to get my dress wet. Are you afraid the water's too cold?"

"I can't swim."

Colleen was dumbfounded by the revelation. "You can't?"

Andrew shrugged. "It's like riding a horse. It's a skill I never needed to learn."

"Ma knows how to swim."

"Her father must have taught her. Mine never did. In retrospect, I believe he doesn't know how and came up with excuses to hide it. He said the Charles was too filthy to swim in and therefore unsanitary, and the few times we went to the Cape he warned of sharks lurking offshore."

Colleen clasped Andrew's hand to reassure him. "Well, we're not going swimming today," she said gently. "I promise, we're just gonna soak our feet a little."

Andrew nodded and removed his boots and socks. "The story you were telling before… why did Jared dare you to go swimming with your clothes on?" he asked, tentatively following her into the creek.

Colleen sobered; she should have realized he would ask about that. It was one reason she and Andrew got on so well; they were both curious by nature. "We'd been playing a game. I had to take the consequence because I didn't want to tell the truth. Jared'd asked me about when I'd been embarrassed the most."

"Something worse than not being able to swim? You don't have to tell me if you don't want to, Colleen, but if you ever do, I won't judge."

Colleen hesitated, but Andrew was her husband, she should be able to tell him anything, however mortifying it had been at the time. And today, he'd been honest with her. "Actually, there were two things I thought of, and I didn't want to tell either one of them. The first was when I got my monthly for the first time. I didn't know what it was… I thought the bleeding meant that I was sick and going to die."

"Your mother hadn't explained it to you? Your real mother, Charlotte, I mean."

"No. And Dr. Mike hadn't explained it either. She didn't even ask me if my real Ma had explained it to me. Lucky for me Grandma was there visiting us, and she told me what was happening."

"I see why you didn't want to share that, especially in front of the boys," he said kindly. "What was the other one?"

Colleen waded around a little before answering, for this memory was even more humiliating than the first. "When I first met him, Jared made fun of me… of my figure. He put a drawing on the chalkboard for everyone at school to see that I… that I was more developed than the other girls." It was part of the truth, anyway. Andrew didn't need to know about Jared trying to touch her. It would only make him angry - and Jared hadn't succeeded anyway.

"I'm sorry you had to go through that, Colleen. I promise you that if we ever have a son, I…" his voice caught, as he realized the subject he'd stumbled onto. Children. Colleen didn't need reminding of how different she was from other wives. She got enough of that from society at large. However, he couldn't leave the sentence unfinished. "I'll do my best to teach him to treat a lady with respect."

If we ever have a son… Colleen couldn't help but note his stumble. It seemed to be by some unspoken agreement that they didn't discuss their future family, probably Andrew's way of not making her feel bad that she wasn't a normal, stay-at-home wife – the type of wife he once expressed a preference for. Andrew had said Colleen had changed his mind on that point – but she couldn't help but wonder at times if he regretted not choosing a partner who could give him a family right away.

"I'll hold you to that promise," she said simply, quietly. Andrew smiled shyly at her and gave a curt nod in return before looking down at his feet in the water, partly to end the conversation, partly looking for where to step next. He had taken a few steps away before he heard Colleen's urgent whisper. "Andrew! Look!"

"Wha— oh."

A doe appeared upstream through the thicket of trees, approaching the creek. It lowered its head for a drink, followed by its fawn. Silently, they watched the deer. It was a magical moment.

A breeze waffled through the trees and the mother abruptly lifted her head out of the water, always vigilant. She seemed to look directly at Colleen and Andrew for an instant, then bounded back into the woods, the fawn trailing.

"Maybe we should head back, too," Andrew said.

"Coming."

While waiting for their feet to dry back on shore, Colleen remarked, "It's so peaceful out here. It reminds me of Colorado."

"Except for the lack of towering mountain peaks, I agree with you."

"Part of me wishes we could stay out here and not go back."

"Homesick?" Andrew asked, worried now that bringing Colleen into the woods was a bad idea.

"No… just that it's so peaceful, and relaxing. No pressure of school, of studying all the time…."

Andrew placed his hand over hers in reassurance. He would have liked to have said that she only had one more year of schooling left, that it would go by quickly, but of course he could not, as she had opted to extend her studies at Harvard. "Believe me, I know exactly how you feel. You just need to remember that it will all be worth it in the end. You'll be a doctor, and we'll be able to work together just as we planned."

"Together with your father."

"Well, yes… but nothing's set in stone. Our original plan was to work together in Colorado Springs. Obviously plans can change, but if you still have hopes of returning to Colorado to settle down and raise our family… I'm sorry, Colleen. There I go again, getting ahead of myself. You might decide to postpone children for a while after earning your degree."

She sensed it again, the suppressing of his dreams in favor of her own. Yet his dreams were important, too. "I can't say how I'll feel when I graduate. But that doesn't mean we can't talk about it at all. How many kids do you want?"

He was startled by her directness. "Oh, uh, well… I think that depends entirely on you. I wouldn't want to overburden you…"

"How many?" she persisted.

"Uh, well, I've never thought of a specific number… but at least two. It gets lonely at times, growing up as an only child." Andrew sighed, glancing out over the creek. "When I was younger, I'd ask for a brother or sister to play with. Eventually I realized my mother would get sad whenever I asked, so I stopped asking."

Instantly Colleen regretted pressing him. She hadn't even considered that she might have trouble conceiving, that she might be like her mother-in-law, or Grace – or Dr. Mike, for that matter. "Andrew… what if that's me? What if I can only have one… or can't have any?"

He rubbed her arm consolingly. "That's highly unlikely. You're young and you're healthy… I think you could have as many children as you are willing to give me. But if it will ease your mind… if for some reason your body is… incapable, we could look into adopting."

"Really?"

"You were adopted, as I recall. I think the results of that speak for themselves." He grinned at her.

Colleen's smile matched his. "I love you."

"I love you, too." He kissed her, and the breeze picked up again, stirring his walnut brown hair. "Hmm… as enjoyable as all this has been, we should head back and make sure the horse hasn't run off with the buggy."

After putting their stockings and boots back on, they returned to their picnic spot, walking hand in hand.

Colleen released a sigh of contentment as Andrew loaded up the last of their things. "Thank you for a wonderful picnic, Andrew."

"My pleasure. Do I get that hug now?"

"Yes, I think you've earned it," she replied, and pressed herself into his arms. "Happy anniversary."

"Happy anniversary, darling." They held each other, relishing this final bit of solitude. Finally, Andrew kissed the top of her head. "It's time to go," he whispered. The young doctor aided his wife into the buggy before climbing in and taking up the reigns.

Their anniversary celebration at an end, Dr. and Mrs. Andrew Cook returned home… to finish what they'd started.

:

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Author's Notes:

-"Dr. Cleveland performed an ovariotomy." – this is the same operation Michaela and Doc Eli performed on Myra in "The Great American Medicine Show", season 1. I included this detail for its historical significance, for Dr. Cleveland really did perform this difficult procedure during this time frame – the first woman known to have done so. We know because one of her students wrote an article about it in a Cincinnati, Ohio medical journal called "The Clinic" in 1875 (if you visit Dr. Cleveland's Wikipedia page, it's footnote #6). The article's anonymous author noted how other women were benefiting from Cleveland's instruction, and concluded, "The rapid advances that will be made in this direction in the next few years, will go far towards dispelling the doubts of those who consider the point still unsettled, as to whether or not women can make good surgeons."

-Enrollment figures for WMCP show a decline between the 1873-74 school year and 1875-76 (I couldn't locate the record for 1874-75). I cannot be certain, but a logical conclusion is that the economic recession of the time created greater financial hardship for potential students. Each year the college offered financial aid to six "capable and well-educated women" by special arrangement, which was kept "strictly confidential."

-"Dr. Cleveland resigned as dean." – She served as dean 1872-74, resigning mostly for health reasons, as she suffered from consumption (tuberculosis), the same disease Kid Cole had in the series. Though no longer dean, Cleveland continued to teach and maintain a practice. She would die in 1878 at age 49. Chemistry Professor Rachel Bodley was appointed her successor. The college would award her an honorary medical degree in 1876. Bodley served as dean for fourteen years until her death at age 56.

-Dr. Ann Preston, a member of the very first group of students at WMCP, became the first in a long line of woman to serve as dean in 1866, serving for six years until her death at age 59. A strong advocate of women's education, she oversaw the opening of the Women's Hospital and arranged for the WMCP students to attend the clinical lectures at Pennsylvania Hospital.

-Wissahickon Valley Park is in the northwest section of greater Philadelphia, popular with bird watchers, hikers, equestrians, bicyclists, and yes, picnickers. Its use as a natural recreation area dates to the 1850s. One website describes it as "quiet and secluded."