Author's Notes: Well, quite a controversy that last chapter caused! Some of you loved the idea of Kasumi as a villain, some of you hated it. Well, for those of you who stuck around, I hope you continue to bear with me, because this ain't gonna be your standard retread of the stations of canon, and this story's gonna get real twisty!
Mr. Haziq: What do you mean by that comment about Kasumi? I legitimately don't get the inference. As to whether this Raven is evil... well, yes, but she may not technically be "Raven"... you'll have to stay tuned to find out, I'm afraid.
And what images would those be, Death of Snipers?
Episode 2: Some Assembly Required
Blackfire blinked rapidly to clear the dazzle from her eyes. 'Since when did Earthlings have remote-range teleporter tech? They're advancing quickly...'
"Yo, what's going on? Why'd you pull us back, doc?" Ran called, his words prompting Blackfire to quickly scan her surroundings, taking in the combination of naked stone and advanced but clearly incomplete technology... Well, advanced by earthling standards, at least.
"Forgive me, but since Lady Blackfire suggested that your conversation required privacy, and since I do wish to speak to her, I thought it behooved us to recall you all here to Project Sentai." A young man offered.
"And you would be...?" Blackfire asked sweetly; polite, interested, and just a little bit flirty. The tone that had served her so well to ingratiate herself with the males of the Teen Titans when they had first crossed paths.
"He's Tatewaki Kuno, he's a teen millionaire who wants to help us operate as Teen Titans Tokyo, now can we please clear up this whole marriage rubbish?!" Nabiki snapped angrily, cutting off Tatewaki before he could introduce himself.
Blackfire permitted herself an amused smirk, but nodded and said, "Okay, okay, this has gone on long enough to stop being funny anyway..."
She strutted over to Shampoo, who looked at her with confusion but no hostility as the Tamaranean levitated slightly off the floor to bring them on even footing.
"Just hold still for a second," Blackfire chirped, and then she darted in and kissed the Chinese she-beast on the lips whilst she was distracted. Shocked gasps echoed from her audience, which she found quite amusing.
Luckily for her, she only needed an instant of contact, because she had to zip sharply backwards to evade a savage backhand from a blushing Shampoo.
"What do you think you are doing, foreign witch?! Even if you do know of the Kiss of Death, it is delivered on the cheek, not the lips!" She spat indignantly.
Blackfire put on her most winning smile and sketched a mid-air bow, whilst making sure not to get in arm's length. "Forgive me, but my people are able to learn languages by lip contact. I merely wished to speak to you in your own tongue so that we might clear things up."
"Oh... I am sorry for my reactions. Today has been... very trying," The embarrassed Chinese mutate confessed.
"Let us try and make it less so. Please tell me; who are you, where do you come from, why are you here, and why do you refer to Ran as your husband?" Blackfire asked her.
'She speaks like a noblewoman from back on Tamaran. Amp up the formality a little, that should make her feel more at home...'
The mini-giantess closed her three eyes and pinched the brow of her nose, inhaling and then exhaling slowly before she opened her eyes and began to speak.
"I am Shan Pu, a warrior of the Joketsuzoku people, who dwell in the village of Nyuchiezu in the Byankala Mountains of China's Qinghai province. Several weeks ago, I was disgraced when I won the annual tournament for young warriors, only to then instantly lose to an outsider girl who had snuck into the village and begun devouring my prize. I gave her the Kiss of Death, a ceremonial pledge to avenge my honor by defeating her, whether it costs either of our lives, but she fled. I pursued her here, only to be deceived by a pair of witches; they transformed me into the creature you now see. But the transformation also made me strong enough to break my bonds and escape them - when I regained control of myself, I sought to avenge myself, but I was accosted by Ran and the other woman. Believing them to be agents of those who tormented me, I attacked them. Having lost to Ran, by the laws of my village, I am now his wife, as he is my husband."
Blackfire blinked slowly, first once, then twice, before she closed her eyes and pinched the bridge of her nose.
"I'm sorry, that is a lot to unpack, but... you have to marry Ran? Because he beat you in a fight? I mean, you can be certain he's not in league with whoever transformed you, but still... marriage?!"
Shampoo nodded solemnly before explaining, "It is the ancient law of my people. A warrior woman who is defeated in battle by an outsider must avenge her defeat by a woman, but marry and bear a child by a man, for surely his children will be strong in kind."
The solemn look was rather undermined when she giggled girlishly and added, "Although, in this case, it is far from a burden! I have long lacked for suitable male companionship, but Ran is both strong and very handsome..."
Blackfire couldn't help but chuckle lustfully herself. "Oh, yes, he's certainly pleasing to look at, right?"
The two of them glanced at Ran with matching hungry looks, sharing a laugh before Blackfire added, "Now, I must speak to Ran and see about straightening this out, if you'll excuse me?"
Shampoo nodded, and Blackfire drifted lazily over to Ran and Ryumimi.
"Well, you two sure seemed chummy," Ryumimi noted icily, folding her arms disdainfully over her chest.
"Jealousy will give you wrinkles, sweetie," Blackfire chirped mockingly in response, wagging a finger at her before she turned a flatter look on Ran, crossing her own arms.
"Okay, I've heard her story, now let's hear yours. She acts like she's never seen you before, and yet you freaked out the instant you recognized her. Story time, Ran."
Ranma hung his head, shoulders drooping as he voiced a huge sigh of exhaustion. "It's a long one... A couple of weeks back, I was on the tail-end of this training journey into China. I met her in a little village way up in the Byankala Mountains, in the Qinghai Province. Wandered in the place when they were having some big martial arts tournament that only comes once a year, big feast for the winner... Problem was, me and pops were starving, and I barely paid any attention, added to the fact I can still not read any Chinese to save my life. Also, I have problems with kanji, same reason… Still, big table full of food. I was stuffing my face in seconds…"
He let out a bitter laugh. "If I'd stopped and thought for just five seconds instead of goin' charging in like my stupid old man, I might have thought about how odd it was that there was food there in the first place. Turns out it was the grand prize for the tournament winner, and Shampoo was pissed to see me chowing down on her winnings. And then I made another stupid mistake, and challenged her to fight for it - I figured if I beat her, that made me the winner, so no harm no foul, right? I took her down easily... and then she gave me the Kiss of Death; a pledge she was gonna chase me to the ends of the earth and kill me to restore her honor! She weren't the only reason I left China... but she definitely was one of them..."
Blackfire's eyes narrowed suspiciously at Ranma's explanation. 'Something doesn't add up here...'
However, before she could voice her suspicions, an incredulous Nabiki dismayedly interjected, "...And you didn't remember this before you started fighting her in the middle of the street?"
"Hey, she didn't have the horns, the tail, the ears, or the eye back then! An', well, she wasn't so... big, either..." Ranma gesticulated in the air, blushing as he did so. "An' I certainly don't know what's with that husband crap either!"
"...Okay, what's the real story?" Blackfire interjected sternly, crossing her arms and looking fiercely down her nose at Ranma, "You clearly missed some details out…"
"I toldja the real story!" He protested in response. Then he blinked as realization sank in, before groaning and putting his face in his hands. "Oh... right... What I forgot to say is that she's never seen me as a guy before."
Blackfire stared at him blankly. "Wait, Wait, Wait…."
Ranma blushed again. "Before I went to her village... I, uh, went to this place called Jusenkyo. Picked up a nasty little curse there. Cold water turns me into a girl, and hot water turns me back."
"...I'd say that's unbelievable, but after Raven, I know magic's a thing. Well, that certainly fills in the gaps. Okay, so the deal is that she came here to Japan hunting this girl who disgraced her - that'd be you, Ran. And apparently she got captured by a pair of 'witches' who transformed her into what she is now. She got away, but she was coming back to try and find them and get some payback when you two showed up and... well, you know how things went from there. Apparently, her people have a code of honor where if they lose to a male martial artist who isn't part of the tribe, they have to get married. So congratulations on your engagement, I guess..." Blackfire shrugged, though she managed to keep the smirk off of her face.
"I don't wanna marry her!" Ranma snapped, eyes immediately flashing to Nabiki and back.
"I don't think she really cares. Says it's a matter of honor... and if there's one thing that unites martial artists across the galaxy, it's the importance of your code of honor, right?" Blackfire asked, and this time she did smile, as Ranma clearly nodded his head in reply.
'Although I always preferred the actual fighting techniques, not all that spiritual rubbish myself,' She added in the privacy of her head.
Ranma then hung his head and groaned in frustration. "Now what are we gonna do?"
"Personally? I think we should offer her a place on the team," Blackfire cheerfully announced.
"...You have got to be kidding," Nabiki dryly announced, tail lashing behind her and betraying her true mood.
"She's strong, she's skilled, she's honor-driven - she'd really add some punch to our little group, and that's always a good thing. Besides, she said she was transformed by two people; how much do you want to bet that they'll turn up as supervillains sooner or later? And look at her; you know she's going to keep hunting them for revenge - isn't it smarter to keep her with us, where we can minimize the damage? Or do you want to let her go on the warpath and potentially hurt innocent civilians?"
Ranma grimaced in distaste, his expression unconsciously mirrored by Nabiki. "Well... shit, you gotta point. I ain't gonna marry her, but... yeah, I could fight alongside her."
"...I don't trust her, I certainly don't like her, but... it is logical. Besides, the more of us on this team, the safer we are, right?" Nabiki begrudgingly conceded. 'Besides, the more bodies between me and danger is always a good thing.'
"I knew you'd listen to reason!" Blackfire chuckled warmly. "Now, the other problem is what to do about her little problem with Ranma's feminine side..."
"Can't we just... not tell her I'm the same person?" Ranma suggested hopefully.
He was met with, although nobody could see it, matching expressions of scorn from both Blackfire and Nabiki.
"I'm sorry, I'm from out of town... remind me again; exactly how rainy is Japan's climate? Not to mention all the property damage that superhero fights can accumulate, which is certainly going to include broken water lines..." The sarcasm in Blackfire's voice was palpable, making Ranma wilt like a cut flower in a heatwave.
"I'd give you maybe a day, tops, before it'd come out, Ran," Nabiki added, making a dainty wave of her hand for emphasis.
"Besides, look on the bright side! Either the Kiss of Marriage cancels out the Kiss of Death, or the Kiss of Death takes priority over the Kiss of Marriage - so, one way or the other, you're going to be rid of one of your problems!" Blackfire cheerfully announced over her shoulder as she turned and drifted back to Shampoo, who had been watching patiently and staring longingly at Ranma.
Blackfire coughed delicately into one fist, before switching to Shan Pu's particular village dialect.
"I have explained your situation to your new husband, Ran, but there is a problem..."
"What are you talking about?! What problem could there be?" Shampoo protested passionately.
"Are you familiar with a place called Jusenkyo? Ran says that it is a realm of cursed water..."
Shan Pu nodded. "It lies not far from my village. It is a forbidden place, full of evil sorcery. Why do you ask?"
"Because Ran made a confession to me... He said that he visited Jusenkyo, before he visited your village. That he is the girl you came here pursuing-"
"What?!"
Shan Pu surged forward, charging past a startled Blackfire, who instinctively jinked aside to avoid catching a horn in the stomach. Ranma paled as the towering Chinese Amazon thundered towards him, stopping just short of him.
"I-I can explain!" He blurted instinctively, recoiling and waving a hand in warding.
"No is true!" Shan Pu cried out plaintively.
"Huh?!"
"No is true, what Blackfire say! You - you no is her! You is Ran! Is man! Girl what Shan Pu kill, she no is you!" Shan Pu insisted. Her face was contorted in dismay, and to Ranma's horror he saw tears start to well in the corners of all three of her eyes.
"I...I'm sorry, Shampoo, but it's true. I was that girl," He confessed, the shame written on his face.
"She Ranma Saotome! You Ran!" She protested.
Ranma opened his mouth, trying to find the words, only to let out a spluttering squawk as a sudden stream of cold water hit him squarely in the face.
"This is getting boring. Get on with it! Also, I'll need to rework the costume to account for the shifts in physique - that height decrease is quite significant..." Doctor Kei muttered to herself, passing the water pistol to a surprised Tatewaki Kuno before tapping at her personal data pad.
Ranma irritably spat the water that had collected in her mouth, then recoiled in fear as she looked at Shan Pu, who now seemed to loom over her like a monolith of flesh and bone.
"Guh-Girl-type... Ranma?" The Joketsuzoku breathed in disbelief. As she blinked, the tears at last broke free and slid down her face. Her face was dark with emotion, and even Ranma could see that her feelings had to be roiling inside of her like a storm, but Shan Pu forced herself to take several deep, cleansing breaths.
"Which one real? Which Ranma real Ranma?" She demanded. She didn't raise her hands or her voice, but Ranma still had to bite back a whimper at the sheer intensity in her gaze.
But Ranma rallied himself (well, currently herself), tapping deep into that wellspring of resentment to add much-needed conviction to his voice. "I'm a guy! This is the curse! I was born a guy, I should die a guy, and I'm only stuck with this wretched body until I can find a way to get rid of it! Now, I'm sorry about your prize, I really am, but I don't know how to pay ya back for it! But wanting me dead for it is overreacting, don'tcha think?!"
"Technically, she just needs to beat you in a battle, it's just that killing you makes the victory truly uncontestable. Still, it's an option, not the required outcome," Blackfire interjected. The glare was palpable.
"I don't throw fights, an' no martial artist worthy of the name would accept a thrown fight," Ranma instantly shot back, bristling defensively as he spoke.
Shan Pu couldn't help but smile proudly at Ranma's words, despite her lingering turmoil. 'And honorable, too! What a catch! ...If only I could remember what the rules were when it came to those touched by Jusenkyo... I am certain that great-grandmother told me once, but I just cannot recall... Wait. They do not know the law, only what I choose to tell them. So it is my choice... do I want the bitter satisfaction of slaying someone for merely besting me in a fight? Or do I want a husband worthy of me?'
'...No shit, I would rather have the husband!'
"Shan Pu is sorry for how Shan Pu treat Ranma. Kiss of Death no more," The Chinese Amazon solemnly stated, bowing her head and trying to look as humble as she could.
Ranma blinked, and then nervously rubbed the back of his (currently female) head in response. 'Wow, Blackfire was right, telling the truth actually did help!'
"Well... then I guess it's all okay, now, Shampoo. I forgive ya," The boy-turned-girl told her, only slightly having to force himself to smile as he said it.
Shampoo's face lit up in delight, and Ranma swallowed hard, because even given his rather considerable extenuating circumstances, that was a sight to make any red-blooded teenage boy feel rather hot under the collar.
"Is good! Now we get married!" Cheered the quite literal Chinese cow-girl, who suddenly lunged to snatch Ranma up into a hug.
A girlish squeal of fear burst from Ranma's lips, his martial artist's training and instincts allowing him to leap out of Shampoo's amorous embrace before she could crush him to her ample bosom.
"Hey, no, stop! I can't marry you! I'm already engaged - to Nabiki here!" Ranma protested shrilly, grabbing a startled dragon-girl and yanking her in front of himself like a human shield.
"Why would you tell her that?!" Nabiki yelped in equal parts shock and anger, her tail sticking ramrod straight up behind her, a sight that made Tatewaki Kuno stifle a giggle.
"C'mon, you don't expect me to cheat on you?" A startled Ranma protested.
"No, I expect you not to draw attention to me from the girl who acts like the world is a jidaigeki novel!" Nabiki shot back, turning a glare on her now-penitent fiancé (technically fiancée at the moment).
"Excuse... what is 'engaged'?" Shampoo politely asked, drawing the attention back to her.
"It means the two of them are promised to marry each other," Blackfire explained, smoothly slipping into Shan Pu's particular dialect.
"Oh," Came the simple statement from Shan Pu, who looked back at Ranma and Ryumimi - whose real name was evidently 'Nabiki'. She touched a finger to her lip, visibly thinking for a moment, and then she smiled.
It was not a very friendly smile.
"Promise no always come true..." She noted, in a conversational tone of voice that did nothing to alleviate the sinister implications of her words.
"Your point?" Nabiki asked cautiously, drawing on her long experience at dealing with less than compliant "customers" to appear as if the taller Chinese Amazon didn't intimidate her.
"Chinese Amazon law strict on Kiss of Marriage. But Shan Pu can be... flexible. No need be marry now. Will let Ranma choose. That fairest way, no?" Shan Pu's tone was friendly, even playful, matching the smile on her altered yet still beautiful face. Of course, given that she posed in a way to highlight her... bountiful natural talents, as it were, it was obvious she expected to be the winner in such a contest.
It was a sight that made an unfamiliar feeling sink its claws into Nabiki, a sensation akin to serpents squirming in her stomach. She was unaware of the fact her claws had grown noticeably longer, or that her teeth were visibly stretching into needle-like fangs as she opened her mouth to tell this... impertinent over-fed dairy-cow exactly where she could stick her attitude...
Perhaps fortunately for everybody, Blackfire suddenly interjected herself yet again, even going so far as to fly a loop-de-loop between the two of them to break their interlocked gazes before she chirped, "Well, then that makes another reason for you to join us!"
Shan Pu blinked, her third eye making the gesture a little unusual. "What you mean?"
Blackfire indicated herself, Ranma and Nabiki before she spoke, smiling brightly all the time, "We are a band of warriors dedicated to fighting evil forces that threaten this town! That includes the two witches who transformed you! So, why not join us? We could use a warrior as strong as you on our side. Besides, think of the glory you could win - and what better way to redeem your honor amongst your tribe? Not to mention, it's a perfect chance to show Ranma your best after accidentally giving him the Kiss of Death instead of the Kiss of Marriage..."
Another tri-eyed blink ensued, before Shan Pu nodded almost absently, before she suddenly smiled in genuine excitement. "Blackfire talk much-much sense... okay! Shampoo join you!"
"Excellent! Welcome to the Teen Titans Tokyo!" Blackfire grinned brightly in response.
'And with you around, things certainly won't be getting boring! Your little rivalry with Nabiki could be quite a lot of fun... Plus, you say you'll let Ranma choose? Well, that just means he can also choose a different girl entirely... Won't be easy to seduce him, but the challenge makes this all the sweeter...' The Tamaranean exile thought to herself, the wicked glee of her thoughts fueling the bubbliness of her exterior. A bubbliness that could have given way to a raging inferno had anyone been unwise enough to comment on how similar she looked to her little sister in that moment.
"If you girls are quite finished your little high school drama session, can we kindly get back to business? Why that head in a jar seemed to think teenagers were the only ones suitable is beyond me," Doctor Kei suddenly announced, using the intercom so her voice echoed like that of an impatient goddess, adding emphasis to her disgruntlement.
"Aren't you only nineteen?" Tatewaki Kuno asked her confusedly.
"I'm a college graduate!" She spat in response, "OK, So I breezed through high school, but that doesn't mean I'm immature!"
"Let's not fight, we just averted that already," Blackfire chided as she floated lazily over to hover just before Tatewaki, sitting in thin air with her knees drawn up and her feet tucked underneath her, levitating just high enough he had to raise his gaze slightly to meet hers.
"So... you want the Teen Titans Tokyo to work for you, hm? And what would we be getting out of this arrangement?" She asked him, studying his face to gauge the truth of his answer.
To his credit, Tatewaki appeared completely unphased, meeting her gaze calmly and levelly as he replied, "Not employed - a partnership. Similar to the arrangement between Jump City and the Teen Titans there. Project Sentai would provide this base of operations with all necessary addendums - medical care, training facilities, even domiciles if need be - as well as financial and legal support should you need it."
Blackfire made a show of thinking it over, rubbing her chin and humming to herself. 'Well, that certainly simplifies things; I was wondering how I was going to get a proper lair setup... best I'd come up with was beating up some low-level chumps and taking their stuff over for myself. This is way better gear than I would have gotten that way, and I don't have to try and bamboozle my new flunkies in the bargain.'
She promptly gave Tatewaki a toothy grin and sketched a Tamaranean royal bow. "Very well, you make a compelling argument! Consider the Teen Titans Tokyo sold!"
"To who, however, to who?" Kei mused from her vantage point, "Rose, I need to talk with you. In private…"
The eyepatch-wearing bodyguard blinked her sole uncovered eye, a quizzical expression hidden behind a veneer of professionalism. And also her mask. Still, she allowed the young science prodigy to lead her to a relatively sheltered alcove, away from where the other teens were currently grouped.
"What's bothering you?" Rose asked, even as she glanced back to make sure they hadn't been followed.
"Of the two of us, you're the one with the overt criminal connections... Honestly, stupid government officials, all I did was make one little computer virus for someone one time... Point is, have you heard anything about Little Miss Ganguro Throwback?" Kei asked Rose, a familiar expression of intense concentration on her face.
"I only dealt with the HIVE Five and whoever was employing my father," Rose mused, "But she has that air of duplicity that suggests... well, we offer her a place to live in the headquarters, preferably with as many overt and covert bugging devices as you're willing to use…"
"You wound me. I would not covertly bug anyone. The base just happens to have 24/7 surveillance and the comm devices come with GPS locators. As well as the fact I borrowed the feed from some satellites that have an acceptable resolution. Things were easier in Corinth…" Kei mused, picking up what looked like a fancy gearbox, with a green boxy object inserted into the top.
She absently caressed the device, turning it over in her hands before she sighed mournfully and put it back down, returning her full attention to Rose. "But yes, I'll be keeping an extra eye on this Blackfire…"
Rose and Kei quietly slipped back to join the rest of the teens, who were so deep in conversation they hadn't even noticed their departure, much less their return.
"If we're going to work for you-" Nabiki was saying.
"With him," Blackfire interjected, still smiling as she said it, but her eyes were cold and hard, mirroring the firmness in her tone.
"Then there's something you need to do for me first, before I agree!" The half-dragon declared, pointing a taloned finger at Tatewaki for emphasis.
"Tch. Mercenary wench, you art truly as avaricious as the beast you now resemble - so fitting a curse it is!" Scoffed Tatewaki, causing Ranma to fix him with a vicious look, curling his fingers into claws until the knuckles cracked.
Evidently, Tatewaki did have some semblance of a sense of self-preservation, for he sighed softly and declared, "Very well. What is your price, Nabiki Tendo?"
"I want you to call off this ridiculous morning gauntlet you make my little sister run," Nabiki immediately shot back.
Tatewaki blinked in surprise, clearly taken aback by Nabiki's demand. Then he let out a short, startled chuckle before he declared, "That's it!? Well, Nabiki, I would be happy to do so but if I had the choice!"
Silence fell over the half-built chamber, Blackfire and Shampoo's attention shifting between Tatewaki and Nabiki, clearly at a loss as to what was going on.
"Uh... ain't you the guy who started this whole stupid thing of Akane having to fight off all the guys who want to date her each morning?" Ranma slowly asked, clearly finding Tatewaki's reaction hard to parse.
To his credit, Tatewaki actually looked embarrassed, sheepishly rubbing the back of his head. "Yes... but I was but a callow youth, then, brimming with unrealistic ideas and overly grandiose expectations!"
"As opposed to now?" Nabiki muttered sourly, making only a token effort to feign that she was speaking under her breath.
Tatewaki ignored her and continued, "But I have realized my mistake since then. In truth, though I admire and respect your little sister, I no longer desire her heart. I allowed the matches to continue because I held hope that perhaps Akane may be standing where you are now - ready to take up the mantle of Nerima's champion, a shining beacon of martial pride and impeccable honor to beat back the rising tides of villainy!"
"You sure like to pile it on with a shovel, don't'cha?" Ranma drawled.
"But... sadly, I have to confess that I fear I cannot extend her such an honor. Your sister's martial prowess seems to have... plateaued. She is certainly effective, but... she shows no signs of improving. It's as if she has deemed that her current skill level clearly suffices and so no further honing is required..." Tatewaki shook his head, almost as if in dismay.
"That... sounds like Akane," Nabiki sighed forlornly, clearly unwilling to admit it, but also unable to deny it.
"That still don't explain why you haven't stopped it, then," Ranma interjected.
At this, Tatewaki sighed, looking very tired. "You ever heard of the proverb of the snowball and the mountain? So far, I've tried several different methods to stop it, even feigned sickness..."
"They still gather around the same time, and Akane wades into them. Once, they were just chatting to each other, not even carrying any weapons, and Akane apparently thought it was the normal morning Horde, and it all started up once again..." Rose offered, "It's not just one snowball, it's two, that are feeding off each other..."
"Well, then it's up to us to grab both balls and give them a good, hard squeeze," Nabiki declared flatly, tail lashing as if to punctuate her words. "If I tell my sister tonight that you've promised to end the morning fights, will I be telling the truth?"
"You have my word, Nabiki Tendo," Tatewaki assured her instantly.
"Anything else we want to get out of the way now, while we're still negotiating?" Doctor Kei interjected in her usual snarky way.
At this, Shampoo suddenly said something in Chinese to Blackfire, with the Tamaranean nodding before she translated for the others, "She wants to know if she can send a letter to her great-grandmother, to tell her about what's happened to her since she reached Japan."
Doctor Kei frowned at the notion. "She does understand that this operation is a /secret/ one, yes?"
Another quick interchange between alien and mutant, before Blackfire answered for Shampoo once again. "She promises to let you look over it so she doesn't say anything secret, and she assures you that it'll be safely delivered to her great-grandmother and nobody else, because she intends to send it with... the martial arts postal service?!"
Blackfire's eyebrows rose up in an all-too-human expression of incomprehension, incredulity coloring her words as she and everyone else turned dumbfounded looks on Shampoo, the Chinese Amazon giving them a look of confused innocence in response.
All of them except for one. Ranma crossed his arms and nodded sagely, an unconscious (he would insist) emulation of his father. "Ah, yes, Martial Arts Post Delivery. An ancient school, largely forgotten today. Only a few families still carry it on today, but a lot of them are in China, I hear."
Now they turned to look at Ranma, Nabiki voicing what everyone was thinking. "You're making that up!"
"No, seriously, it's a real thing! I studied under one when I was about eight. Their style's big on wilderness survival and movement through rough terrain, so pops wanted me to master it," Ranma assured her.
Doctor Kei pinched the bridge of her nose briefly, then sighed loudly. "Well... I suppose, given the conditions, I can agree. How much trouble can one little old lady in a remote Chinese backwater cause, anyway?"
Before anyone could weigh in on the matter, alarms suddenly began to blare, lights flashing red and blue as they had earlier that day.
"Warning! Warning! Paranatural criminal active! Warning! Warning! Paranatural criminal active!"
"Another one?!" Ranma blurted instinctively.
"The vocal warning's a little overkill, don't you think?" Blackfire asked conversationally.
Doctor Kei ignored them, instead tapping frantically at her wrist-mounted personal computer. "Incident occurring in Akihabara shopping district!"
"Then what are we standing around for? Let's fire up the teleporter and go and help!" Ranma urged.
"Unfortunately, the teleporter is still in its production stages. Its energy reserves are limited and its range more so - Akihabara is currently inaccessible," Came the blunt statement from Doctor Kei.
"Then what are we supposed to do? Walk?" He asked, waving his hands in emphasis of his disbelief.
Doctor Kei smiled triumphantly to herself and stood up. "Fortunately, I have a solution already prepared. Come!"
The young scientist briskly stood up and walked away. The fledgling superheroes looked at each other in mutual confusion, before turning as one to Tatewaki Kuno and Rose, who simply shrugged helplessly in response. With no alternative answer forthcoming, the four members of the newly anointed Teen Titans Tokyo hurried after her.
Moments later...
"Behold, my pride and joy; the Ground Outdoor Operational Network General-Purpose Explorational Rover! Or 'GO-ONGER' for short," Doctor Kei proudly announced.
The so-called 'GO-ONGER' was a long, four-wheeled vehicle with a sleek, almost oblong shape, painted in white with the English letters of its abbreviated title painted on either side. The teen superheroes looked at it, bathed in the light of a spotlight that seemed to have been rigged up almost specifically to give it a dramatic lighting system, before Ranma spoke up.
"...It's a motorhome," Was Ranma's blunt appraisal.
"It's a sophisticated multi-terrain attack and surveillance vehicle, thank you," came the icy rejoinder from Doctor Kei, who seemed rather put out by the lack of appreciation for her work.
"Is this what became of that decommissioned school bus you had me purchase?" Tatewaki Kuno interjected, looking askance from the machine to the doctor and back again.
"Can we focus on the important thing here? How is this actually supposed to help? None of us have driver's licenses, and even if we did, Akihabara is roughly three quarters of an hour away from here - the problem will be over before we get there," Nabiki pointed out.
Doctor Kei's frown was replaced with a smug grin as she dipped her fingers into her pocket and pulled out some keys, jingling them briefly in the half-dragon's direction. "Naturally, I will be driving. As to getting there in time... the GO-ONGER has more tricks up its sleeves than you realize. But if we're to succeed, we must go now."
"Hey, this is why I agreed to become a superhero in the first place!" Ranma declared, punching the air to emphasize his excitement.
"Well, I missed out all the fun before, and I could use some action," Blackfire purred, eyes briefly lighting up into amethyst flames.
"I can't let Ran take the field without Ryumimi, can I?" Nabiki asked, the question mostly rhetorical.
"Where Ranma go, Shan Pu follow," The Chinese cowgirl added, her three eyes seeming almost to glow as she looked at her newly minted teammates, as if daring any of them to say otherwise.
In all fairness, they probably would have raised the multiple valid reasons why Shan Pu going to join them after she had literally been seen terrorizing Furinkan maybe half an hour ago, maximum, was a bad idea... but the urgency of the situation, emphasized by the still-blaring alarms (Doctor Kei had at least shut-down the voice-recording and clarions, largely so they could all hear themselves think, but had forgotten the lighting), meant that the thought never occurred to them. Instead, they all piled into the GO-ONGER - Doctor Kei first, immediately sitting down at the dashboard, which bristled with buttons, levers, screens and other paraphernalia that clearly did not belong in your standard motorhome. The actual members of Teen Titans Tokyo followed, taking seats in an interior that really did look like a motorhome. Shampoo, however, found that her new...growth spurt... made things a little cramped, forcing her to sit on the floor, head hunched, rather than in a seat.
"The interior still needs some work, especially in light of our newest recruit. But all systems are go," Doctor Kei announced conversationally. None of them could see the uncharacteristically mischievous smile she had as she inserted the key into the ignition and gave it a sharp turn.
Two minutes later...
There was no place in any of Tokyo's vast array of shopping districts quite like that found in Akihabara. Japan's centerpiece of electronics and the spiritual heartland of both otaku and idol singer culture, under normal circumstances it was a vibrantly bustling place that thrummed with life.
These were not normal circumstances.
"Ah-hahahahaha! AH-HAHAHAHA! Cower, foolish mortals! Flee in terror from the all-conquering power of... the TECHNOTAKU!"
Most of the shoppers, window browsers, cosplayers and tourists had fled already, or at least barricaded themselves inside shopping departments. Even the most hardcore of otaku were, as ordered, cowering in fear and trying not to attract attention.
The reason for the panic? A literal army of robots had taken to the streets and were running rampant. Now, that might have sounded impressive on paper, but these weren't the usual battle-droids associated with Western supervillains or secretive military projects. This was an army of robotic toys and models. Destroid Tomahawks marched in lockstep up and down the street, arms that should have been just hollow molded plastic somehow launching real blasts of energy that blew fist-sized craters in the concrete. Iron Kongs clambered up telephone poles and swung from power cables, whilst squadrons of ZAKUs whirled and wheeled overhead.
Every imaginable variant of gunpla figurine was on the warpath, intermingled with the other robotic goods normally on offer at Akihabara. And at the center of it all, laughing maniacally, was the self-proclaimed Technotaku.
He was, fundamentally, an average sort of guy. Average height - he could have been either a rather tall teenager or a rather short adult. Average-looking features, made ugly through harsh living; stained, crooked teeth, deep bags under his eyes from late-night anime binges, gaunt cheeks bristling with acne from poor washing and a diet largely comprised of cheap junk food. He could have been a youthful looking young adult, or a kid aged by too many stimulants and late nights. He wore what looked like a life-scale replica of a Macross Valkyrie pilot's helmet, except it had been customized to resemble a stylized crown as well.
He flicked his fingers and scintillating beams of electrical energy surged from his fingertips, sizzling through the air and striking boxed mecha model kits on the shelves of a store whose window had just been blown open by one of his minions. The boxes exploded, the plastic components inside spiraling into the air and assembling themselves into intact figurines, expanding in size several times over. Their eyes glowed with the same energy and they immediately ran, hovered or flew to join the ever-growing army of mechanical mooks.
"Hahaha! Behold the power of Technotaku! Flesh is weak! Metal is strong! We are invincible!" Cheered the supervillain, proudly making his first debut…
Then he squealed like a little girl and threw himself onto the safety of the sidewalk as a car horn blared frantically behind him. He narrowly avoided being run over, but he still painfully scraped off some of the bigger pimples on his cheek in the process.
"Ow! What kind of maniac are you?!" He complained, scrambling to his feet with as much dignity as he could muster. Then he finally registered the sight of what could have been his demise, and he just stared in disbelief.
"...What's a motorhome doing in Akihabara?" He asked aloud. Never mind that the driver looked not much older than him.
The door flew open, and squeezing out of the door came the biggest woman that the Technotaku had ever seen, outside of some really niche ecchi art he'd been shared on an imageboard. He winced in fellow feeling as she caught a cow-like horn on the side of the door, having done something similar with his own helmet that morning, but she quickly compensated and freed herself. She was followed by three figures that he did recognize.
"Ah! The Teen Titans Tokyo! I expected no less! ...Alright, no, I didn't. Seriously, I thought you were based in Furinkan? How the hell'd you get out here so quickly, I barely started five minutes ago," He asked, genuinely curious.
"Let's just say that when a crazy science chick tells you her precious baby car can get somewhere fast, you better believe it!" Ranma unthinkingly advised him.
"Um... Okay, sure, good advice... no, wait, what am I saying?! I am the Technotaku, and today, Teen Titans Tokyo, you will surrender to my awesome mecha might!" Roared the supervillain, gesturing grandiosely at the four teens opposing him.
The newly fledged super-teens looked at the Technotaku, then at the 'robot army' that was massing around them. Blackfire, lazily floating in the air, was the first to speak up.
"So, correct me if I'm wrong... but your plan is to take on a Tamaranean warrior-princess, a martial arts genius, a half-dragon, and a mutated Chinese Amazon... with an army of toys?" She drawled, not even trying to hide her sarcasm.
What portions of the Technotaku's face were visible went a dark, bruised-looking red as he screamed so hard that specks of blood flew from his mouth, "They! Are! Not! TOYS!"
And as if to prove his point, the mecha figurines all took aim; energy blaster barrels began to glow, missile pods snapped open, magazines with slotted into place, chaingun barrels began to spin. It was an army equipped with model-sized weaponry that was all too real in its functionality.
Unfortunately for the Technotaku, whilst this little display of force might have been intimidating for regular civilians... the Teen Titans Tokyo weren't regular citizens by any stretch of the imagination. And even worse for him, such grandstanding gave them all a chance to react.
"Scatter!"
In hindsight, nobody was quite sure which of them said it. All they knew was that they all acted as one, breaking apart in four different directions, forcing the Technotaku to likewise divide his forces to pursue them, snarling in rage as he did so.
Ranma
'Man, it's been a weird couple of days,' Ranma mused to himself, his thoughts quite placid for a guy who was currently dodging missiles being shot at him by killer action figures. He backflipped over the miniaturized explosions, smoothly turning the motion into a picture-perfect goomba stomp on his assailants, plastic crunching into slivers under his feet.
'Get dragged from China without any chance to look for a cure, get engaged to a cute half-dragon girl, meet an alien, become a superhero, Shampoo shows up with a really different new look, get the kiss of death annulled but get engaged to her in the process...'
Something that Ranma could only vaguely describe as a mechanical red, white and blue samurai wielding a sword of green light came hurtling through the air, intent on slashing him across the face. Unfortunately for the animated model, Ranma's reaction time was far faster, and he lashed out with a knife-hand strike that split it in two across the middle, both chunks spiraling through the air for a moment before exploding in a dramatic-looking, yet harmless, spray of plastic shrapnel.
'And now I'm fighting a guy callin' himself the Technotaku and his army of killer toys!'
Digitized snarling drew him forcefully back to the real world as he realized he had been surrounded by figurines of robotic lions and tigers. The sounds they made - feline snarling run through a synthesizer - and the crudely cat-like shapes reached deep into the darker reaches of Ranma's soul, drawing forth just the faintest twinge of fear. But no more than enough to elicit a momentary prickling along his spine, before Ranma grinned darkly to himself.
'Oh, I'm gonna enjoy this...!'
Shampoo
'I had hoped, however tentatively, that I might be fortunate enough to visit Akihabara after dispatching my pigtailed nemesis... but this is most certainly not how I pictured it going!'
It was quite the bizarre vista as Shampoo, a strange melding of she-hulk, Chinese Amazon and cowgirl, was circled by squads of idol figurines riding on futuristic bikes, whilst blocky mecha in the vague semblance of humanoid soldiers attempted to take aim at her as their faster counterparts presumably kept her distracted.
Unfortunately, they hadn't reckoned on who they were dealing with...
'Garlands from Megazone 23, VR-038L Bartleys, VR-052F Mospeadas, ATM-09-ST Scopedogs... some of Ling-Ling and Lung-Lung's favorite mechas from our pirate TV channels. They might never forgive me for this...' Shampoo thought to herself with no small trace of grim amusement before she raised her foot and shot forward, attempting to stamp on one of her smaller cycling assailants.
She hit square on and crushed it to a pulp, as planned. What wasn't as planned was the way the shockwave rippled through the pavement like a miniature earthquake, splitting the concrete as violent vibrations surged from the impact point, knocking the other cycle-mechas flying into spectacular crash-landings.
Shampoo blinked, all three eyes shutting and opening in unison.
'Wow. That was not what I intended to do. How much stronger has this cursed body made me? I wonder... I have seen great-grandmother use this trick, but can I...?'
Curling the fingers of her right hand into a tiger's claw, she drew back her arm and then punched with all her might in the direction of the Scopedogs. The force of her blow turned the air itself into her weapon, a veritable cannonball of displaced air slamming into the massed figurines and pulverizing them without Shampoo having laid a physical hand on them. It also punched a small crater in the concrete under them, but that was unimportant.
Shampoo smiled triumphantly to herself, clenching her former claw-hand into a fist.
'Well, now... this raises possibilities...'
Nabiki
'I hate this, I really, really hate this! Is it really too late for me to get out of this superhero thing?'
Nabiki's heart hammered in her chest from exertion, lungs burning for air as she sprinted down the street, model Valkyries in GERWALK hot on her tail, sporadic sprays of bullets smacking into the asphalt behind her.
'Why couldn't this have happened to Akane?!'
Even as she thought it, she still racked her brain, trying to figure out how to get out of this mess. Flashes of white suddenly materialized into a large squad of Zentraedi battlepods massed on the street in front of her, aiming their turrets right at the approaching dragon-girl.
'Only got one chance, this better work!'
Instead of swerving, she hurtled straight towards the Zentraedi mecha, watching as their turret-tips began to glow in preparation to fire. At the very last second, reflexes honed on the tennis court combined with magic-bolstered strength to send her hurtling forward in a leap she would have once considered impossible to make. Her wings instinctively fluttered as she vaulted over the bizarrely shaped mecha, tail curling defensively against her body as she felt the static tingling of lasers that only just fell short of striking her. But the massed Valkyries behind her weren't so lucky; several exploded into plastic shrapnel, and the survivors immediately opened fire - not on Nabiki, but on their traditional enemies.
As the two rival factions of gunpla models began hammering at each other with all their strength, Nabiki instinctively stepped over to a particular sign before turning back to watch the fruits of her gambit play out. She smiled proudly to herself...
"SKREE-ONNK!"
And then nearly leapt out of her skin at the sudden synthesized shriek from just behind her. She turned from the battle of the Macross gunpla, and found herself staring down at the snarling mechanical form of a Zoid - a Death Saurer, to be precise. The black-and-red cybernetic dinosaur glared up at her with glowing eyes, before menacingly opening its jaws to reveal its charged particle cannon beginning to glow.
A sudden flare of heat began to roil in Nabiki's own stomach in response as a spike of rage suddenly hammered itself into her forebrain. Somehow, the animated toy became less a threat and more something she recognized from her days at Junior High School... a challenge. And she knew how to deal with a challenge...
(And, in a tiny back corner of her mind, her father's voice echoed from the depths of history: "Oh, Nabiki, we can't buy you that - it's far too expensive! Besides, that's a boy's toy - it's not something little girls should want to play with!")
Instinctively, Nabiki reached down into the burning, squirming sensation in her guts and belched forth a torrent of flames - sun-yellow surrounding a core of sapphire blue - that slammed into the Zoid like the fist of an angry god, leaving first a shadow, and then nothing. When she closed her lips, there was nothing but a bubbling puddle of molten rock where it had been standing.
The half-dragon stared at that faux-magma for what felt like an hour, before a Tallgeese buzzed her, its beam sword swiping at her face. Nabiki instinctively ducked away, and spat a fireball that engulfed the gunpla before it could dodge, causing it to explode into burning wreckage.
More flying mecha gunpla began to circle her, but Nabiki found herself grinning savagely, a familiar sense of confidence flaring back to life, almost as if it were stoking the literal fire inside of her.
"Well? Come on, then! I'm nobody's damsel in distress!" She sneered, doing her best to ape a stance that she dimly remembered of her father telling her was Dragon Style kung fu.
Blackfire
The many displays of Akihabara blurred into a fascinating collage of colors, vague shapes and lights as Blackfire soared through the sky, pursued by a veritable armada of animated human toys. The Tamaranean exile grinned savagely, feeling her heart thunder with adrenaline as missiles, bullets and energy blasts whistled past her skin as she twisted and twirled with all the grace that her sky-dancing tutors had inculcated into her.
'Stupid fools! If I can outrun a Centauri capture-probe, then you pitiful things don't stand a chance!' She mentally mocked as she did a barrel-roll, using the motion to catch sight of her current teammates.
'Well, look at that! They're not doing so badly after all... They might just shape up to be worth it,' She smugly noted to herself.
Ranma was utterly decimating a pack of cat-shaped robots, smashing them into pieces with a vindictive delight that was slightly puzzling, but ultimately of no concern to Blackfire. Shampoo, meanwhile, was a veritable wrecking ball, smashing her way through anything stupid enough to catch her attention. Even Nabiki (Ranma evidently really wasn't too good at keeping secrets; she'd need to work on fixing that) was holding her own, spitting fire and clawing at anything that got past her fiery barrages.
A micro-missile suddenly slammed into her back and detonated, the explosion jarring her back to reality with a grunt of irritation. She cast an icy glare back at her pursuers.
'Okay, playtime's over...'
She stopped her flight sharply, freezing in space so suddenly that the animated gunpla couldn't react in time and rocketed right past her. And that put them all right in Blackfire's sights. She held her hands outstretched, the glowing aura of each appendage merging together before she unleashed a continuous stream of purple-colored plasmic energies that swept through the ranked masses of mecha. They went off like fireworks, dissolving into bubbles of explosions in a scene that could have been lifted straight from an old mecha anime.
When Blackfire alone ruled the skies, the grinning Tamaranean made a show of dusting off her hands.
Meanwhile...
Beneath an advertising hoarding, a young girl was gibbering to herself. She'd just been doing her job, greeting people who came to visit the store she worked at, when suddenly this insane otaku was wrecking the place. She clutched the music player that she'd picked up in the rush to run out of the store, having seen many of her guests using them. She peeked out from her hiding place, only to duck back in as a squadron of Valkyries flew past on a strafing run, several of the figurines that had been sitting on the shelves now riding them.
"Shimatta…" She muttered, looking towards the shattered front of the store she'd been working in, and the kindly man who had been running it, now slumped against the wall, a bloody streak behind him.
Dashing out of her hiding place, she felt for a pulse, then found a blanket and draped it over him before hurrying to a new hiding place, pausing as she saw an odd looking van, the door open. She slipped into it, finding a small enough cubby hole. Whoever owned this van, she doubted they'd be back for it, and she just wanted to rest. Barely acknowledging a blinking red rectangle in one corner of her vision…
Moments later...
Kei slipped back into the GO-ONGER, a bag of items being dropped onto the chair next to her. Thankfully, the main area she'd been intending to visit was somewhere that didn't have that much gunpla in it, although she did regret that she'd not be able to get as much as she wanted once the smoke settled. Almost all of it was destroyed by this idiot. She'd gone past one shop she'd wanted to visit, since they did Busou Shinki and similar robot girls, but all she'd found was the place trashed and someone having put a blanket over the owner.
She took out her new phone, calling a number. "Yes, he calls himself Technotaku, Damages have definitely reached the minimum for calling you," She declared, "There are confirmed casualties, and I've got myself a new team. Teen Titans Tokyo… Ah good, you've heard of them. Technical support, as usual. Gave several shop assistants a teleport beacon disguised as a limited edition figure. I should have the place mapped by tomorrow,"
She then hung up and got out her computer so she could observe the battle, as one-sided as it was…
In the fray...
"No! NO! You've ruined everything!" Wailed the Technotaku, clutching his cheeks in horrors as he screamed like a little girl at the sight of his glorious army reduced to so much plastic debris, even as the self-proclaimed superheroes of Tokyo regrouped in front of him.
"Aww, what's the matter? Did we break all your toys?" Blackfire mockingly asked, the sweetness of her tone somehow underpinning the punch of her choice of words.
"Now we break him?" Shampoo suggested eagerly, cracking her knuckles as she did.
The Technotaku's face went red. "Y-You haven't won yet! I'll show you!"
He screamed defiantly as he raised his hands to the sky, crackling bolts of energy spewing from his fingertips and flashing across the street, striking wherever the remnants of his 'army' lay scattered. The detritus flew through the air, swirling into a whirling funnel of winds and plastic shards and a blinding light that had all four of the Teen Titans Tokyo shielding their eyes from the glare.
When it faded, they found themselves being overshadowed by an enormous mecha, easily two or even three storeys tall. Unlike the gunpla figurines it had been assembled from, it didn't seem to be based on any single specific series model. It was a clunky, boxy, humanoid machine, with its right arm ending in a massive gun-barrel and its left hand replaced by the square mass of a missile launchpad. A strangely shaped turret sat on its left shoulder, and its head was dominated by what at first appeared to be a single massive cyclopean eye, but a closer look revealed it to actually be a cluster of at least two dozen green lenses, more like a fly's compound eye than anything.
"Bwa-hahahahaha! Cower, puny mortals, you cannot stop the Technotaku's ultimate minion! The Super Fighting Robot, Omega-16!" Crowed the mecha's creator, currently perched triumphantly upon its right shoulder.
"...Huh. For a nerd, he sure can move quick when he wants to," Ranma noted absently.
"Any ideas on how to take this one down, fearless leader?" Nabiki asked, unable to keep the snark from her voice as she looked right at Blackfire.
"This time I break you! Kill them! KILL!" Howled the Technotaku, cutting off whatever Blackfire might have thought to say as he stabbed violently at the assembled teen heroes.
Omega-16 instantly leveled its cannon-arm at Shampoo and blasted her with a searing bolt of pink plasma energy before any of the shocked teen superheroes could react, launching her into a deserted store across the street amidst an almighty crashing of glass and plastic shelving. Its compound eye lenses began to glow, discharging a veritable rainstorm of laser fire on Ranma, forcing him to cartwheel away, flipping, tumbling and twisting as only somebody who had mastered Monkey Style Kung Fu could hope to achieve in order to keep himself safe. The turret on its shoulder began to spin, spitting more lasers - this time aimed at Blackfire, who climbed desperately skyward as part of her evasive maneuvers. And finally, its pod-arm snapped open and launched a barrage of rocket-propelled grenades at Nabiki.
This last choice didn't pay off as expected as Nabiki opened her mouth and blew out the biggest stream of flames she'd ever unleashed. The searing white flames struck the flying explosives, cooking the munitions inside and detonating them prematurely in a massive fireball.
The dying flames provided a lighting most suitable for a smile that teenagers throughout Furinkan had learned to fear, Nabiki waving a finger at the Technotaku in sarcastic reproach. "Ah-ah-ah! We're not so easy to take down as all that."
With perfect comedic timing, a starbolt rained down from above and caught the Omega-16's turret, blowing it to pieces in a rain of plastic shards and electrical sparks. Likewise, Ranma snatched up a piece of stone debris in his tumbling and launched it with inhuman accuracy through the air, catching the Omega-16 in one of its optic lenses just as it began to glow with built-up energy. The fractured lens explosively discharged itself, the entire compound eye of lasers shattering as waves of energy rippled across its fragile surface and tore it to pieces, causing the mecha to sway unsteadily and nearly topple its master from his perch.
"My baby! You'll pay for that! You'll find its armor a much tougher nut to crack! You'll join your companion in death!" Screeched the Technotaku, stamping on his mecha's shoulder - then nearly falling off as he ducked a flying chunk of rubble that almost took his head off.
"Shan Pu no dead yet!"
Frantically clawing his way back onto the Omega-16's shoulder, the Technotaku sucked in a deep breath, clearly ready for some defiant banter, only to instead let out a girlish squeal of shock, and promptly fell off of the robot again.
Shan Pu blinked in confusion and surprise at this reaction, before turning to Ranma. "What wrong him?"
Her surprise only deepened when Ranma's eyes went wide as Mu Si's glasses, his face turning the reddest she'd ever seen, even as the rest of him remained as frozen in place as the Technotaku's now-masterless machine.
"You too? What happen?" The confused Chinese Amazon demanded.
"You seriously telling me you don't feel a draft, China girl?" Nabiki incredulously asked her, doing her best to avoid looking at her as she did so.
Finally, the confused Shan Pu looked down, and her cheeks colored as she realized that, in addition to knocking her clear across the street, the Omega-16's energy blast had been too much for her already overstressed blouse, leaving her naked from the waist up.
'By the goddesses and the ancestors, how did that happen?! ...Then again, I suppose I should be grateful to still be alive after taking an attack like that with nothing more than some bruising... But no time to wallow in shame or self pity; I have a foe to smite!'
"That good shirt! Now Shan Pu mad!" She bellowed, charging right at the Omega-16 and exploiting the opening that the sight of her... talent... had created in its defenses. With the Technotaku distracted, he was unable to order his creation, and it simply stood there like a giant toy as Shampoo slammed her hand right into its midriff and yanked out some mechanical organ.
"No! Not the Tem Ray Circuit!" Wailed the Technotaku.
Shan Pu grinned savagely, and crushed the sparking piece of machinery in her fist. She was caught by surprise when the Omega-16 suddenly spewed beams of light from every joint and seam, before disintegrating into a massive mound of pulverized plastic, dissolving into a dust-like mass without a sound.
The Technotaku whined, a high-pitched, nasally squeal of dismay as he saw his ultimate weapon annihilated.
"He who fights and runs away, lives to fight another day!" He cried, spinning on his heel and sprinting away as fast as he possibly could...
Only to run right into a picture-perfect haymaker to the jaw from Nabiki. He folded like a cheap napkin, and was unconscious before he hit the pavement.
"Nice work!" Ranma called appreciatively to her, Nabiki instinctively preening from the praise as he wandered over and idly nudged the fallen supervillain with his toe.
"Not bad for our first real outing as a team," Blackfire observed proudly as she descended from the sky.
"We go now?" Shampoo asked, attempting to preserve her modesty with both hands, which... wasn't working out as well as she would have hoped.
"Don't we need to do something to make sure he goes to jail, first?" Ranma pointed out uncertainly.
A great glob of white gelatinous goo, resembling nothing so much as the sticky paste that Ranma vaguely remembered being permitted to use in grade school, whistled past Ranma's head and splattered across the unconscious Technotaku, gumming him thoroughly to the ground.
"There. That protoplasmic polymer will keep him contained until the proper authorities arrive to release him," Doctor Kei declared, casually holding the futuristic-looking bazooka that she had just fired at the Technotaku. "Now come; they've already been alerted to the situation, and we need to get back to base. That outfit is more suited for Kabukicho than Akihabara..."
And with that, she turned and walked briskly back to the GO-ONGER, gun on her hip and complete self-assurance in her body-language. The teen superheroes looked at each other briefly, before obediently piling into the vehicle after her. The door hissed shut behind them, and GO-ONGER's rear morphed into a stacked array of jet thruster-like engines, which roared to life and sent it blasting off down the street in a blur of silver-and-crimson.
That evening - Tendo household
"And, as suddenly and mysteriously as they arrived, the Teen Titans Tokyo departed, leaving behind a battered but grateful Akihabara shopping district in their wake!"
The news reporter droned on in the background as the combined Saotome and Tendo families sat down to dinner. For once, Nabiki wasn't hiding her half-dragon form, leading to the incongruous sight of the reptilian teenager sitting side by side with her human fiancé, the two taking serves from a simmering pot of sukiyaki as if they were any ordinary couple.
"Mmm, this is great stuff, Kasumi!" Ranma cheerfully announced around a bite of marbled beef.
"She's only the best cook in the whole block," Nabiki proudly explained, her tail jauntily flicking behind her and draping itself almost affectionately along Ranma's legs.
"Oh, yeah? Well, I bet you give her a run for her money," Ranma replied, swallowing his latest mouthful and reaching out to pinch a mushroom between his chopsticks.
A rare blush faintly dusted Nabiki's cheeks as she mumbled, "Well, um, I... don't really practice it much..." Then she hastily served herself some noodles from the communal pot.
Soun and Genma watched the interplay with fond paternal smiles on their faces, the two men visibly basking in the warm glow of success that their mad scheme to unite their families seemed to already be paying dividends. In contrast, Kasumi seemed indifferent to anything other than eating her fill of sukiyaki, going after the biggest pieces of meat, tofu and vegetables with what might almost be called aggression.
Akane, meanwhile, just watched her sister and Ranma with a simmering air of hostility and curiosity. As the television began to play interviews of the few people who had stayed to watch the fight, though, she finally gave in to the curious side of her feelings.
"What'd the vice-principal want with you two, anyway?"
"Would you believe there's a secret base being built for us - for the Teen Titans Tokyo - underneath the school?" Ranma asked, the retort somewhat muffled by the large chunk of tofu and vegetables wedged in his cheek.
Akane stared at him. In fact, everybody except Nabiki stared at Ranma, but it was Akane who first voiced her thoughts. "Oh, come on, that's ridiculous even for Tatewaki Kuno!"
"An' yet, that's where we were. Vice-principal's gonna consider our superheroing to replace the usual club requirements," Ranma nonchalantly observed, trying to take a really big piece of beef, only to pout as Kasumi beat him to it.
"Speaking of Tatewaki Kuno, we got him to agree to call off that stupid morning fight routine," Nabiki added, before she began to blow cooling breaths over some noodles.
Akane looked at her mutated sister with surprise and hope warring in her eyes. "You-You really mean it, sis?!"
Nabiki nodded, and Akane almost cheered in relief. "Well, it's about time! Honestly, I expected them to give up ages ago!"
Ranma and Nabiki glanced at each other, sharing a small, knowing look, then diplomatically returned to their dinner.
Meanwhile, at Project Sentai...
Blackfire looked at her room, which was little more than just a hollow in the rock with a cheap snap-together cupboard, a futon, and a door, and shrugged her shoulders.
'Well, I've slept in worse. Plus, the doctor said that I can customize it to my liking as the place gets settled in. All told, this is pretty good. It just needs one little finishing touch...'
She made a show of stretching and then leaning casually against a wall in one of the corners that would, hypothetically, be harder to cover with a concealed camera. Then she surreptitiously reached up underneath her hair and gently removed something that had been tucked away against the back of her skull.
Had there been anyone else in the room, they would have seen it was a small disk of silvery filigree... one that uncurled itself into something that looked like a mechanical cross between a house centipede and a dragon. She placed her hand against the wall, and the mechanical creature skittered out of her palm and began scurrying rapidly across the rough stone.
'A Dhorian cybernetic bug-biter... just the thing for getting rid of pesky little spycams, hidden microphones, and anything my dear hosts may have thought to secrete away in my new quarters...'
She stepped away from the wall, rotated her shoulders, and let out a yawn that was only partially faked before leisurely approaching her door.
'While it gets to work, I think I'll go and see what they have to eat here... nothing like a good fight to work up an appetite! ...Besides, don't want to risk Shan Pu eating everything before I get there...'
In the dark of the night...
The GO-ONGER sat still and silent in the darkness of its garage, the human (and human-adjacent) residents of the base having turned in for the night, and even the robot staff having shut down until sunrise with nobody awake to monitor them. As such, there was nobody around to see as a slim, slender, girlish figure gingerly slid open the GO-ONGER's doors, stepped out from its interior, and then equally gently shut them behind herself.
She looked around in surprise, somehow unphased by the dim emergency lighting - a compromise between saving power and the total lack of light that would come from being so far underground. Then the stranger timidly set off, furtively creeping towards the door leading from the garage into the base's interior.
'So hungry... I don't know where I am, but surely there's food here somewhere?' She hopefully assured herself.
As she passed beneath them, the lights flickered, only their low power setting making the wavering almost impossible to notice.
Under the witching hour...
Candles of ebony black and bloody red shed a dim light that filled Kasumi's room with a spectral luminescence. Thbey illuminated the form of the eldest of the Tendo sisters as she lay supine atop her bed, naked as the day, completely vulnerable as a robed, hooded figure painstakingly painted eldritch symbols on her bare skin.
The sinister image presented was rather spoiled when Kasumi began giggling like a schoolgirl, squirming helplessly on her sheets.
"Will you please sit still!? These glyphs must be drawn perfectly!" Complained the girl painting her, her second set of eyes opening to add weight to her disapproving frown.
"S-Sorry, Rae-Rae, but it tickles!" Kasumi snickered, grinning stupidly up at her lover.
"Just bear with it a little longer, I promise, I'm almost done," The cambion assured her. Once Kasumi lay still, she bent back to her work, painstakingly inking the final symbols over Kasumi's womb.
"There we are... that's a good girl," She crooned, placing the brush down and picking up the black diamond that she had given Kasumi earlier that day. It visibly throbbed and pulsed now, a crimson light shining unnaturally in its interior.
"Now be a brave girl for me and try not to scream - it'll all be over soon, I promise," She cooed, and before Kasumi could respond, she gently placed the gemstone atop Kasumi's navel, chanting softly under her breath.
Kasumi nearly bit her tongue as an ethereal current seemed to run through her body, waves of jarring, jolting pain assaulting her mind. She grit her teeth, moaning and hissing, groaning as her whole body seemed to seize up at once, every muscle tensing at once. There was a sensation she could only describe as somehow draining, as if she were a dishcloth being wrung out tight... and then, as suddenly as the pain had come, it ended, leaving Kasumi panting and sweating profusely on her bed.
"There we are! That's my brave, strong Kasumi - and look at what you did for us," Cheerfully announced her beloved Rae-Rae.
Panting hugely, Kasumi bent all her will to raising up her exhausted head, and saw that where a gemstone had once lain, there was now a little red fox curled up on her stomach. Before her wide eyes, it gently uncurled itself, looking right at her with eerily human innocent blue eyes. It slowly stood up on wobbly legs and staggered close enough that it could almost touch its little wet nose to her own.
Kasumi recoiled, lip curling in disgust as she looked up at her lover.
"This is your secret weapon?" She asked, brusquely pushing the half-grown fox-kit onto the floor, ignoring the 'kon!' of surprised dismay that her rough treatment elicited.
"Oh, she might not look like much at the moment, but she'll grow up quick! By morning, she'll be perfectly ready for me to send her off into the city to start making some mischief. You did very well to incubate her, my sweetie... you earned this..."
Kasumi's eyes went wide with delight, shimmering with lust as her girlfriend swept back her cloak, revealing herself to be naked underneath. The eldest of the Tendo daughters tilted her head back and spread her arms as the cambion straddled her and swooped down to press her hot, black-painted lips to Kasumi's neck.
On the floor, ignored by both women as they hissed and moaned together, the fox whimpered softly to itself as it nosed open Kasumi's cupboard and slipped inside. Finding a long-abandoned teddy bear from Kasumi's childhood, it wrapped itself around the cuddly toy, burying its head into the soft, stuffed plushness of its lap, taking what comfort it could from its inanimate affection...
The next morning...
The sounds of grunts, shouts, and incoherent battle cries echoed through Nabiki's bedroom window, the cursed teenager groaning in dismay and trying to smother the noise with a pillow over her head. A particularly loud bellow caused her claws to tear into the pillow sheet, wringing a tiredly outraged groan from her and causing her to bolt upright.
"Honestly, do they have to do this every morning!?" She spat disdainfully, glaring at her window in frustration. She grumpily threw aside her bed linen and went downstairs to give them a piece of her mind.
'Honestly, fiancé or not, I need my beauty sleep!' She grumbled to herself as she rounded the stairs and stepped out into the garden. There, she found Ranma and Genma, hands locked together and with Ranma visibly struggling to hold his father at bay.
"C'mon, boy; put some muscle into it! You normally put up twice this much of a fight!" Genma snapped, bullishly thrusting forward.
"I...I'm tryin', old man! I...I don't feel so good..." Ranma moaned, although he was clearly doing his level best to resist Genma's advance.
Even from where she was, Nabiki could clearly see that Ranma's skin was unhealthily pale, huge bags evident under his eyes, and his skin glistening with an almost greasy layer of sweat that was sticking his hair to his scalp and visibly staining his undershirt.
"Hmm... you do look a little feverish," Genma admitted. "I think maybe you should take a cold bath!"
And with that, he hooked his foot around Ranma's ankles and swept his son's feet out from under him, before using this to leverage his strength into a judo throw that launched Ranma across the garden and straight into the koi pond.
"Don't you two ever get sick of being up and fighting at this awful hour?" Nabiki sourly asked her future father-in-law.
"It's a necessary sacrifice! Martial arts require constant training and struggle - and if you're going to do more than just stand around and look pretty, girl, then maybe you should start joining us!" Scoffed Genma, who folded his arms over his chest.
"You stupid uncaring old idiot!" Roared Ranma as he surfaced, spitting water in disgust, glowering angrily at his father.
"What kinda father are you supposed ta be, treatin' yer only son like this?! Ain't ya ever heard of...of... what's wrong? Why're ya staring at me? C'mon, pops, ain't nothing ya ain't seen before," Ranma grumbled, finally covering his chest with his hand in a reluctant acquiescence to feminine modesty, trying to maintain a sullen glare in the face of his curiosity at his father's gobsmacked, open-mouthed silence.
Genma finally managed to find his voice, shouting aloud, "How did you get cured?!"
Ranma stared at his father; now it was /his/ turn to be stupefied. "What're ya talking about? I - Huh?!"
His shock only doubled as he realized that he couldn't actually feel the now-familiar sensation of breasts squishing against his covering arms. Gingerly, reluctantly, he looked down, eyes going wide in shock as he realized that Genma was telling the truth!
"I...I'm a guy again!? Ha! I'm - I'm cured! I'm normal again!" Ranma cried out, bursting out into triumphant laughter, even as his eyes flooded in tears of relief.
"But how?!" Genma demanded.
"I dunno, it just - it just happened! Maybe it wore off?" Ranma suggested hysterically, even as he continued to hug himself, tears of joy rolling down his face.
Unable to take it anymore, Genma threw himself into the pond as well, only for the hulking form of a very disgruntled panda to emerge. He grabbed Ranma by the shirt and began shaking him, growing incomprehensible panda-speak, but Ranma just continued to laugh. Until Genma slapped him, that is, whereupon Ranma punched his father in the face and kicked off of his chest to land on the shore.
"...I hate to burst your bubble, Ranma, but I think we should have Doctor Kei take a look at you. As much as you want this, you have to admit, this isn't normal," Nabiki gently yet firmly announced.
"Huh? Why should - whoa!" Ranma turned to face Nabiki, only to go beet-red and spin back the way he had been facing, covering his eyes with his hand for good measure. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to!"
Nabiki blinked, looking at Ranma in confusion. Then she looked down at herself, and realized she was wearing her favorite nightie instead of her usual pajamas. The nearly translucent pink one, which was just clear enough to make it obvious that she wasn't wearing a bra underneath. She blushed harder than she could ever remember blushing before, hastily covering her chest with both hands.
"Th-That's... That's alright, it was an accident... But anyway! My point is, you need to get checked out, Ranma, and Doctor Kei is the closest thing we have to a doctor who understands your weird body. You said you were feeling weak? Well, what if it's related? I mean, a sudden inexplicable feeling of sickness and then your curse just happens to stop afflicting you? There's no way that's just coincidence!" Nabiki pointed out, her confidence building steadily as she delved deeper into the logic of her argument.
"Well... yeah, I guess that makes sense," Ranma conceded, scratching the back of his head, but pointedly keeping his face turned away from Nabiki.
"Then come on - we'll get changed and go. Now."
Genma gesticulated and grunted, but realized that neither his son nor his daughter-in-law were paying attention. Hanging his head with a sad quasi-ursine grumble, he grumpily trudged up onto the lawn and began trying to shake off the worst of the water soaking his fur. Ranma and Nabiki headed inside, quickly heading upstairs to their respective rooms.
None of them noticed the dark figure in Kasumi's bedroom window, grinning sadistically down at them...
Chapter End & Closing Notes
If you saw this twist coming, give yourself a scriptwriter's credit! I'll be honest, I actually wasn't intending to cure Ranma - at least, not THIS soon in the story. But brainstorming sessions will lead to odd directions, what can I say? As for the mysterious girl from Akihabara, and Kasumi's new creation? Well, their story will be told in due time...
As always, leave a review if you can, and there's a TVtropes page already up for the Teen Titans Tokyo series that really needs some love, so swing on by and give it some attention!