The childhood of Meria Waters legitimized Meria Lannister for the first few years, and she had grown up with a loving mother who combed her hair, sang her Dornish lullabies and told her stories to put her to sleep. Only then Dyana Sand had died, and then the child had discovered that the Kingsguard member who often came to visit her and her mother was actually her father. He had taken her to Casterly Rock in the care of an unloving grandfather.
Lord Tywin had not been a loving grandfather at all. On the contrary he had always looked down on his bastard granddaughter just as he looked down on his young son Tyrion whose only fault was being born deformed and also having "killed" his mother, his father's beloved wife, by coming into the world, perhaps Tywin would have forgiven his son for being a dwarf if only his wife had not died or vice versa he would have forgiven him for causing her death if he had been born… Normal.
Queen Cersei had not even tried to be kind to Meria had never shown her the slightest affection and the child had soon realized that the farther away from the queen the better.
Prince Joffrey, the queen's eldest son, despised her just like his mother, unlike his siblings who were kind to their cousin, and although they resembled their mother and brother in appearance and not at all like their father, they had the opposite character. In fact, Myrcella and Tommen were kind and good-hearted and therefore entirely different from their elder brother and mother.
Jaime wanted to baby his daughter who was a mostly absent father and visited her three or four times a year, but Meria knew that he loved her, and she loved him, although she would have preferred him to defend her from the bullying of Cersei, Joffrey and Tywin.
On the whole however Meria's existence at Casterly Rock had been rather quiet with a grandfather who ignored her most of the time, her grand-aunt Lady Genna who cared for her and who was for her the closest figure to a grandmother she had never had then however she had learned that Lord Tywin had ordered the death of the children of her mother's cousin Princess Elia Martell. Poor Aegon and Rhaenys had met a terrible fate. They had been murdered in a brutal manner, to say the least, and their only crime was that they had Targaryen blood and were the children of Prince Rhaegar Targaryen, the heir of Aerys the Madman, and thus represented an obstacle to Robert Baratheon's claim to the throne after he had defeated Prince Rhaegar at the end of the Battle of the Trident. Battle that had put an end to Robert's Rebellion.
Deep down, Meria understood the political reasons behind the death of her cousins, but was it really necessary to kill them in such a brutal way and every time someone told her that she looked unbelievably like Elia, even though her hair was almost white-blond but curly like her mother's cousin and Rhaenys', she felt like crying and wondered what she had done wrong to share blood with the man who had ordered the death of two innocent children who also shared her blood.
Meria had received an education worthy of any self-respecting noble girl, despite being a bastard. She loved to ride and did so dress as a man, much to her grandfather's disapproval, and she hated embroidery. She liked to spend her spare time riding, walking outdoors, swimming in the river that ran through the woods near Casterly Rock. She often did these activities in the company of Lady Genna or her uncle Lord Tyrion. Genna, just like her brother, did not approve of her grand-niece riding in men's clothes, but she manifested her disapproval less clearly.
Meria's life changed a few months before her 16th birthday when she was summoned to the capital with her grandfather Lord Tywin and her uncle Lord Tyrion. As soon as she had set foot in the Red Keep she immediately sensed that something was wrong because her father did not greet her with his usual smile and the lion had a contrite expression.
It was her aunt Queen Cersei who announced that she was to marry the king's younger brother, Lord Renly. The union had apparently been Lord Tywin's idea, and Lord Jon Arryn the Old Lion had promised to settle the debt the crown owed House Lannister in exchange for his granddaughter's legitimacy, Lord Arryn had procured a good match and Lord Renly had gained a castle and a mine.
Apparently everyone was enthusiastic about that union, everyone stood to gain except Ser Jaime who was vehemently opposed to the marriage of his daughter who was not even sixteen and not even Lord Tyrion agreed. Meria? Oh, well, she was an obedient girl who believed in the Seven and who had been taught by her Septa that a woman's duty was to her family, to her father, to her obviously male relatives and the girl had lost count of the number of times she had been told that if she ever married it was her duty to be a good wife, to bear children, to help her husband when he asked and to keep quiet if not asked among other things. Absurd how many duties a wife and in general, a woman had and how many a husband and in general, a man.
"I will marry Lord Renly and do my duty." Meria said, ending the discussion that Cersei, Tywin, Jaime and Tyrion were having. The other four people in the room only seemed to remember her after she had spoken those words.
"Fortunately, it seems your daughter is smarter and knows her duty to our family better than you do." Tywin observed in a cold tone, turning to his eldest son.
When Jaime told her that she did not have to that if she wished he would put her on the first ship bound for Dorne or somewhere else far away Meria replied that it was all right and that there were worse things than marrying the king's brother and besides Renly was not much older than her, she was attractive, he did not share a passion for wine with his brother or for prostitutes and as far as she knew he had not fathered any illegitimate children. In short, on the whole she considered herself lucky.
She married Renly Baratheon two months before her 16th birthday as all but her father, great-aunt Genna and uncle Tyrion are mature enough to marry. Ser Jaime Lannister escorted her down the aisle of the Great Sept of Baelor with the air of a man who was escorting his daughter to the gallows rather than to marriage. Meria pretended not to notice the admonishing look her father gave her groom, and frankly Lord Renly looked anything but a happy groom, and the expression on his face was similar to Jaime's.
A little girl of not even sixteen was what Meria was, just a little girl who had been brought up hearing wonderful stories where the handsome knight rescued the maiden, they married and then lived happily. She was not naive, unfortunately she had already experienced first hand how cruel life and people could be especially if you were born on the wrong side of the bed, however could one blame her for thinking she was lucky to marry Renly? A young, tall, handsome man from one of the most important houses in the kingdom and the king's brother.
During the wedding banquet, Meria tried in vain to strike up a conversation with her consort, but he ignored her for the most part and the few times he did speak to her, it was to give her short answers. The girl noticed the glances that the groom gave occasionally to his friend Ser Loras Tyrell, the Knight of Flowers, but she did not pay any attention to the fact that her husband did not speak to her and thought that perhaps he was simply shy or nervous.
Renly did not even lay a finger on her later after they were left alone and half-naked in their bedroom at the end of the Bedding. He told her that he felt she was still too young to consummate the marriage and that he thought it wiser to wait. At the time he thought it was nice of him to worry about her, but soon discovered that her young age was probably just an excuse.
A few weeks after the wedding, she knocked on her husband's bedroom door and, receiving no answer, decided to enter anyway. She had finished her stash of parchment and wished to send a letter to her great-aunt. She wanted to confide in her and ask her advice about her marriage, which was still to be consummated, but when she opened the door, a scene appeared in front of her that she never expected to see: Ser Loras was kneeling on the floor, Renly was standing in front of him with his trousers down, and the Knight of Flowers had in his mouth… The maiden stared incredulously at the two men for a few seconds then recovered from her shock and left the room, closing the door softly behind her.
Dyana Sand, her mother, had once explained to her that there were men who preferred the company of other men just as there were women who preferred the company of other women, and some people had no real preference for either sex. According to the Faith, homosexuality was a sin, but Meria's mother had taught her that love was love and that it was right in all its forms and had explained to her that people in Dorne were more open-minded and had even told her that her cousin, Prince Oberyn Martell had numerous lovers in his life both women and men.
A few days passed before Meria found the courage to confront her husband. Initially Renly denied it, but eventually admitted that he was in love with Loras and that he believed he could never love anyone else as he loved the night, especially a woman. Poor Meria was deeply disturbed by those sincere and at the same time cruel words. She had hoped her husband would be one of those men who slept with both men and women.
Renly was not at fault for his inclinations and his wife did not condemn him for falling in love with a man instead of a woman, but there remained the problem of the non-consummation of the marriage and the need to produce an heir. The young woman did not wish to force her husband to do something he did not want to do. However, she felt that they should at least try. Unfortunately, but, it seemed that the Lord of Storm's End was not at all attracted to women. They tried several times to consummate the marriage without success.
Months passed and soon Queen Cersei and Lord Tywin began to pressure Meria to conceive a child as soon as possible. Failure was not contemplated was the phrase father and daughter repeated again and again. Jaime and Tyrion tried to defend Meria both saying that sometimes it took time for such things, that Meria was young and that she would surely conceive a child sooner or later. Each time the queen replied: sooner than later, hopefully.
By this time, it was the tenth month of the year and the new Lady of Storm's End had been married for six months, and as the Queen and the Lord of Casterly Rock grew more and more impatient for glad tidings and kept telling the maiden that a barren wife was useless people at court began to mutter behind the bastard's back. Some insinuated that Lord Renly was disgusted with her because of her bastard status and that he could not even get aroused in her presence, and indeed they were right only that the problem was not the bride's birth condition.
Two ladies covered in cloaks whose hoods covered their heads walked through the streets of King's Landing escorted by an armed man. One of the two women approached a poor one-legged man who was sitting on the ground with his back pressed against the wall. The man stank and who knows how many days he had not washed, and furthermore, it was likely that he had not had a good meal for some time.
"Thank you, my lady." The man exclaimed in a tone of gratitude when the woman, whose face he could not see, threw some gold coins at him. The woman did not reply and walked away followed by her two escorts and the man thought that she must surely be a noblewoman because the cloak she wore was precious and because she was escorted by a knight.
Within a short time, the group reached their destination: a wooden house on whose door was a small window whose glass was tinted.
"It must be here. I was told the door has a small window with stained-glass, and we are close to one of Lord Baelish's brothels." Commented the woman who had given the coins earlier to the beggar. The brothel she was referring to was mostly frequented by people of low social status. Those people who were poor but could still afford to pay a small amount to sleep with a woman or a man. Of course the prostitutes were not as good and skilled as those who worked in the brothels frequented by richer people, but otherwise they paid what they could afford.
"I don't like this place. These streets are frequented by the worst scum living in this city." Commented the knight, looking around circumspectly, who had hardly taken his hand off the pommel of the sword he wore strapped to his belt since they had reached that point in King's Landing.
"That is why you have come with us, Ser Tymor." The youth replied. She knocked on the door and waited for someone to open it or invite them in. The second woman seemed as nervous as their protector if not more so.
"Come in." Said a female voice. The noblewoman made to open the door however Tymor placed a hand on hers stopping her.
"I will go in first to check that there is no danger." He affirmed.
"I do not believe this woman could wish for our deaths." Skeptically the other replied however she withdrew her hand from the door and allowed the warrior to precede them inside.
"You may enter, it is safe." Said the man shortly afterward, reappearing on the doorstep of the house after having disappeared inside. Without answering, the noblewoman crossed the threshold followed by her companion.
"Who are you and how did you come here?" Asked a woman standing by the fire burning in a small fireplace on a wall to the right of the dwelling. The maiden removed her hood, revealing a long hair of such a light blond that it almost looked white.
"I am Lady Meria Baratheon." She replied. The hostess turned to look at her. A veil similar to the one Septe usually wore covered her hair and she wore a brown dress.
"You are the granddaughter of Lord Tywin, the bastard daughter of Ser Jaime Lannister." Hers was not a question, just an observation. Meria was so used to people using that derogatory term addressing her that she did not even pay attention to it unlike her protector.
"I advise you to show respect." He said, in fact, in an intimidating tone.
"Never mind Tymor after all what this woman said is true. I am a bastard and the fact that the king has legitimized me cannot change that sad reality." She commented. "I need your services, so I have heard rumors that you realize that… That I am able to increase desire." She continued, struggling to suppress the embarrassment she felt.
"I heard that you married the king's brother, and I am surprised that a bride as young and beautiful as you would need my services." Reiterated the other as she approached.
"Even young, beautiful women can need a… Help." The girl replied. The stranger stared at her for a few seconds.
"You know when Princess Elia was alive I sometimes saw her walking around the city and distributing food and money to the poorest. She was a good and generous woman. The people of the city were genuinely saddened when she died." She affirmed as she approached a large shelf with several shelves on which were stored various flasks of all sizes and colors. "You look very much like her." She said taking a small bottle and handing it to her.
"Many people tell me that." Honestly, she was starting to get fed up with people telling her that. She took out some coins and placed them in the palm the woman held out to her. It was rumored that she was a witch and that in addition to preparing various concoctions she was also able to do magic and predict the future. Meria did not know whether to believe those rumors or not.
"Thank you." She said bending her fingers over the coins then suddenly her gaze became vacant. She kept her eyes open, yet it was as if she saw nothing.
"Are you feeling alright?" Asked the Lady worriedly after a few seconds.
"Soon a war will break out that will devastate the kingdom. The siblings will fight each other for the throne, a bastard will sit on a throne that does not belong to him. The kingdom will be divided and ravaged by war. You will become pregnant by the end of the year and have a son, but one day his half-brother may become a threat to him." The tone of her voice was strangely different from the one with which she had addressed Meria earlier.
"Oh, then I will tell my husband and the rest of my family to prepare for this war." She said not at all perturbed by the woman's words. "I wish you a good day and hope I will not need your services in the future." She had to turn away and leave the house, but before she could take even a step the witch grabbed the wrist of her right hand and squeezed it. The blonde gasped.
"Dragons will return to the skies and a Targaryen woman will try to take back what she believes is rightfully hers. You will have to be strong Lady Meria. Two challenges await you, and you will suffer greatly, but this suffering and the love you will feel for your children will make you stronger." Predicted the witch. Meria released herself from her grip.
"Thank you for the warning, but we really must go now." She said in a nervous tone as fear invaded her. She noticed out of the corner of her eye that Tymor was about to approach, probably to get the witch away from her. However, Meria signaled to him with her hand not to approach. "Don't worry Tymor, it's alright. This woman only wished to warn me." She said striving to use a calm tone of voice and determined not to heed the words of a woman who was beginning to think she was crazy.
"Be very careful Lady Meria." The woman, who seemed to have come to her senses, advised herself. The blonde exited the house followed by her personal servant and her sworn shield. None of them uttered a word as they made their way to the Red Keep. The mongrel was determined not to heed the words of the witch, who was convinced she was speaking the words of an insane person; she also asked Lily and Tymor not to heed what the woman had said and not to tell anyone about what had happened. Indeed, she had already made this last recommendation the day before when she had decided to go to the woman because she feared that if it became known at court that she had gone to a woman of dubious reputation, people might misunderstand and form a bad opinion of her and her intentions.
"Will you talk to Lord Renly about the idea you had for… To try to solve your problem?" Lily asked later as she helped her lady get ready for bed. The blonde had already put on her nightgown and her friend was now brushing her hair.
"Of course, I'm not going to give him that concoction without talking to him first." She replied without hesitation. She had asked her husband to join her before she retired for the night, and he had also agreed because they both knew that it was good anyway to keep up appearances and to make believe that her husband regularly visited her rooms or that she visited him, although they often did not even attempt to fulfill their marital duties and just chatted. After all, it was pleasant to spend time together, although of course the husband would have preferred to spend those hours in the company of his lover.
"Do you think it will work?" Lily asked who along with Tymor and perhaps Loras was the only person along with her and her aware husband that the marriage had not been consummated and that she was still a virgin.
"If it doesn't work I don't know what else we can try and if I don't have a child soon I don't dare imagine what could happen." She responded by recalling the words her aunt repeated to her regularly, namely that her position as Lady of Storm's End would not be secured until she became pregnant and gave birth to a possibly male child and that if the marriage was ever annulled her second husband might not be as agreeable as her first. Those words concealed a veiled threat.
"Maybe that woman was right when she said that you will be pregnant by the end of the year." Said the maid in an encouraging tone. The other turned to look at her and smiled.
"Let's hope so." She replied, thinking that was the only part of what the woman had said she wanted to believe would come true. "Do you think if I were to have a child it would have blonde hair? All my aunt's children have blond hair and seem to have inherited more from her than from the king." She continued, rising from her chair.
"Possibly, I think…" Before Lily could finish her sentence a sound of shattering glass was heard, and when Meria stared at the floor she remained motionless with half-closed lips at the sight of the pieces of glass scattered on the floor and the liquid that had spread across the floor as a result of the breakage.
"Oh, on the bottle!" Exclaimed the blonde.
"I'm sorry, it was an accident. I hit the flask with my elbow unintentionally, and it fell on the floor." Said the servant mortified.
"Don't worry you didn't do it on purpose. It was just an accident." She replied, striving to remain calm.
"You are not going to visit that woman again? The neighborhood where she lives is not nice, and I'm honestly not sure if it's a good idea to use that liquid to increase desire and try to lie with your husband." Exclaimed the friend who had previously expressed her misgivings about her lady's plan.
"I don't think I have much choice, but I suppose I could ask Tymor to go." She replied, trying not to be taken aback. "Now go get the necessary cleaning soon Lord Renly will be here, and I don't want him to see this mess." She continued using her usual gentle tone. She was always kind to servants as opposed to other nobles like her aunt because her mother had taught her to be kind to everyone from the beggar to the richest noble. She was aware that because of her origins she might end up sweeping or floor or worse. Ser Jaime had taken care of her and made sure she had everything she might need. Not all men took care of their mongrels the way he did. She was lucky, even though she had not grown up in a family where everyone was kind.
After Lily had left without first apologizing again for what had happened she sat down on the dressing table chair from which she had just risen, and her gaze fell on the Seven-Pointed Star symbol of the Seven Gods that she had hung on one of the walls of the room.
"Mother, Father, I appeal to you to help me. My husband is a good and kind man and does not harm anyone. I don't think there is anything wrong in loving a person of the same sex. He and Loras do not hurt anyone. Please help us and give us the gift of a son, please." She said pleadingly, repeating the prayer she had been repeating every day for some time, even several times a day.
That night he dreamt of a small deer in a sunlit clearing. At a certain point, a dragon appeared in the sky and when she saw it, terror invaded her, and she feared that the dragon would eat the baby deer. Instead, the great winged beast landed near the baby deer, which did not seem terrified at all, and she was surprised to see the fire-breathing beast that, instead of eating the little animal, behaved as if it wanted to protect it.
When she woke up, she felt confused by the dream. She often had dreams that seemed very realistic to her, but she usually dreamt of an army of blue-eyed creatures that sowed death and destruction. She regularly had these dreams and began to believe that they concealed some meaning and wondered if the dream about the deer and the dragon was really just a dream or if it had a hidden meaning. The problem was that she would not know where to turn for answers.