2. NEVER HAVE I EVER

.

"Go back upstairs and get dressed. You are not going out like this."

Janet laughed as heartily as if he had just cracked the world's funniest joke. "Sorry, Daddy, no can do. You are so cute, Bri. Come on, let's go."

Brian heaved a sigh. He hadn't expected any different.

He had always been a babe magnet. Handsome and athletic, he had never, since high school, lacked for female company. Unlike many a heartthrob, he had never been cruel or disrespectful to women since he also possessed genuine kindness and decency, as well as smarts.

By his early twenties, he had built up an impressive roster of ex-girlfriends. Every breakup had been amicable. He had thought he knew women fairly well.

Nothing in his prior experience had prepared him for Janet.

The diminutive girl he had noticed on the bus one morning was a revelation. Everything about her was a surprise. A pleasant one, for the most part.

In all the time they had been dating, he had never seen her dressed up to the nines. That was another thing which set her apart from most other girls. She didn't seem to care about clothes. She dressed as if trying to downplay her stunning looks instead of showing them off.

If that was her purpose, she failed. Whatever she was wearing, be it jeans and a tied-up plaid shirt, or a loose-fitting garment resembling mechanic's coveralls, or a simple skirt with a casual sweater, her loveliness shone through. When they went out, Brian's emotions fluctuated between pride for being with the most striking girl in the place and an uneasy feeling that every guy in the room was ogling his girlfriend.

But that was the price of dating Janet. A price he was happy to pay.

And then there was tonight.

She had descended the stairs in Mrs. Starr's house wearing a royal blue off-the-shoulder cocktail dress. Unlike her usual baggy clothes, the satiny fabric tightly hugged her firm, perky breasts and tiny waist, flaring out into a puffy full skirt with a hem just above the knee.

Worst of all were her feet. She had on three-inch stiletto pumps with pointed toes. Bright red. He knew that the moment she started dancing – and there was simply no way she was not going to dance – every male's eyes would be glued to those tantalizing feet.

Brian looked her up and down with uneasy admiration. "You look... wow."

"If I look wow, then what's the problem? Don't you want me to look wow when we go out?"

"There's wow and there's way too wow," he murmured.

"Come on, Bri, don't be ridiculous. It's your best friend's engagement party. Did you expect me to turn up in my workout clothes?"

"You know what I mean, baby. Dressed like this, you'll need an armed escort on either side to get you safely there and back."

She stood on tiptoe and, pressing against his chest, looked him in the eyes. "I have all the escort I need, armed or not."

"Wait! You are gonna freeze with your shoulders all bare like that! At least add another layer."

"Say no more," she unexpectedly agreed. "I got just the thing."

Until that moment, Brian hadn't realized she was carrying a tiny red purse which matched her shoes. Just as he wondered how practical a bag this size could be, since the only thing that could fit in it would be one lipstick, she opened it and pulled out what at first looked like a small ball of bright red yarn. She shook it out, and it magically turned into a gossamer, intricate-looking lace scarf.

"There! Better now?" She draped the scarf rakishly over her shoulders.

"Worse," he groaned.

"Perfect! Let's go."

...

"Enough jumping around, you guys," announced Louise, the hostess and George's fiancée, after everybody had been dancing for a couple of hours. "How about we all catch our breath? Let's play Never Have I Ever."

"Couldn't you think of a more mature pastime?" asked someone.

"We have our whole lives to be mature. Let's be kids while we still have the chance."

Everybody sat in a circle around a coffee table with a few bottles of red wine and glasses on it.

"Maura, why don't you get the ball rolling," Louise addressed her best friend.

"No problem," agreed Maura. "Never have I ever... had sex in an elevator."

George and Louise raised their glasses in sync and proudly drank.

"Never have I ever... had sex in a moving elevator," took over the young man sitting next to Maura.

A solitary glass was raised amidst raucous laughter.

"Come on, guys, let's get off this track," complained Louise. "Can't anybody think of any exciting subjects other than sex?"

"NO!" responded the group in unison.

Louise shrugged resignedly. "Okay then. My turn. Never have I ever... had sex with two guys on the same ni – Oh no, Janet, your pretty dress!"

Janet's bosom and skirt were now adorned by a large red wine stain. The glass she had been raising to her lips lay on its side on the table, miraculously unbroken.

"Baby, what happened?" Brian leaned over her with concern. "You okay?"

"Janet, come with me quick!" yelled Louise before Janet had a chance to reply. "Let me help you with this. You don't want it to dry, or you'll never get it out. Come on, come on, come on!" Grabbing Janet's hand, Louise whisked her away to the bathroom.

Armed with paper towels and a salt shaker, she went to work.

"The patient may pull through, after all." She pointed to the dress after laboriously blotting and salting the wine stain. "Now, let's sort you out. What happened back there?"

"Nothing. My hand shook at the wrong moment, that's all." Janet was staring down at her skirt.

"Look, Janet," began Louise awkwardly, "I'm sorry if that was inappropriate. I didn't mean to get anybody upset. It was all in good fun, you know?"

"I know. I am not upset," murmured Janet.

"So, I just wanted to ask... none of my business but... is there something that's bothering you? A problem of any kind?"

Janet shook her head.

"Listen," continued Louise, "we don't know each other that well yet, but now with me marrying George and you dating Brian, we are gonna see a lot of each other. I'd like us to be friends. So, if there's anything you need to talk about... it may be easier with me than with someone who's known you for a long time. Besides, I am training to be a therapist, so I could use the practice. But if you want me to butt out, I understand."

"I am fine, Louise. Honestly. And thank you so, so much for your help! You are too kind." Janet smiled brightly at the other girl. Then turned away and muttered under her breath: "Much kinder than I deserve".

...

Brian stepped out onto the balcony and shut the door behind him. Leaning on the railing, he was deep in thought when he felt a hand on his shoulder. He swiveled around to see George's good-natured smile.

"So," said Brian.

"So," replied George.

"Big step, eh?"

"Very big. Listen, I've been meaning to talk to you about something important. I'll be moving out soon. And so should you. Don't tell me you can't afford a place to yourself."

"It's not about the money," said Brian reluctantly.

"Then what? Misplaced loyalty? Is that it?"

"George, you don't understand! He's been my pal since middle school."

"When he latched on to you like a barnacle and has been riding you ever since."

"Cut him some slack, okay? He is not like you or me."

"I'll say!"

"He'd be lost on his own. He has no schooling to speak of, no training, no job skills – "

"Good old Brian. You and your saviour complex. Always trying to carry the world on your shoulders, eh? How is that any of your fault? And how are you responsible for him? Do you intend to lug him on your back all your life?"

"Just until he gets back on his feet after being fired, lands another job – "

"And when is that gonna happen? Never! Why should he bother doing an honest day's work when he has you to wipe his ass for him? If you know what's good for you, you'll get out of that apartment and let him fend for himself for once in his miserable life. Find yourself a nice smaller place. And get your girl away from that creep ASAP."

"What?!"

"You heard me."

"Quit talking in riddles, George. Do you know something I don't?"

"Look, your Janet – " George saw Brian tense and hurried on. "She is a great girl. Special. But let me tell you, she's been through some heavy shit. You can see it in her eyes. She's had stuff happening to her she'd much rather forget."

"Hey, how do you know so much about my girlfriend?"

"Take my word for it. I can tell. Last thing she needs is that little jerk messing with her. I've seen the way he looks at her, and I swear, pal, that guy is trouble."

"Are you listening to yourself?" Brian tried to muster all the righteous anger he was capable of. "He's never tried anything with her! And if he ever does, I know how to deal with him. Where is this even coming from?"

"Don't be naïve, Brian. Just you wait and see. Hope it's not too late – "

"Hey boys, what are you doing out there, gossiping?" Louise stuck her head in the balcony door. "Get in here, I am about to serve the coffee."

"Coming, sweetheart!" George turned to Brian and said quietly: "Pay attention, pal. I am not kidding. I wish I were."

Just about to join his two roommates out on the balcony, Steve stopped short and cussed under his breath.