Thanks to all of you who have reviewed or favorited this story. I really enjoy reading your comments. They make my day. :)
Anyway... here's the last chapter for awhile. I've spent a week working on the next one, but it's not quite finished yet. So I don't know if I'll have anything for next week at this point. This one is a bit of a doozy for Ana. Sorry...
Chapter 12: Darkness Encroaches
They continued east in search of Ramandu's Island. The first few days at sea were calm and the sun was shining down on them. Luck seemed to still be on their side and they would be able to spot the Blue Star easy enough. However, though the sailing was smooth, a feeling of unease lurked in the air.
Coriakin's warnings were on the minds of many as they left the Island. They wondered what sort of tests they would face and if they'd overcome them. Ana had a feeling hers had to do with the nightmares she kept having but wasn't sure exactly which ones. The flashbacks from her past or the visions of a potential future. If they were visions, Ana knew this could very well be her last adventure. In all of them, she died.
However, after just a few days, their luck ran out and a storm soon fell upon them. It rained day and night for two weeks. Small fights and scuffles began breaking out among the crew. Everyone was restless. Shifts had to be created as it took several men to keep the ship on course during a storm. But people needed to get as much sleep as they could in the meantime. Sleeping on a ship was difficult under normal conditions and doing so during a tempest seemed impossible.
While Caspian and Edmund helped with the ship's rigging and steering, the ladies were forced to stay inside. There wasn't much more they could do than what was already being done. But it was mostly because the Kings wanted them safe from the weather. Besides, if they were dry Lucy and Ana would be ready to help if there was an injury. With the constant downpour, injuries from slipping and lost grips were more common.
Everyone was cold and wet, as miserable as Eustace had been the whole journey. Reepicheep was the only one whose spirits remained positive, which actually began to get on everyone else's nerves. Even Ana and Lucy had their moments, mostly due to being unable to sleep properly. So Reepicheep was put in charge of guarding their rations and supplies. With the poor weather, everyone had grown irritable and some had been caught trying to take more food. Which had only made the situation worse.
After days of being lost in a tempest, the Captain grew worried that they would never find the Blue Star. With the storm raging, they had no idea if they were still heading in the right direction. Ana knew Drinian had been in meetings with the Kings several times to try and convince them to turn back. Rations had been cut in half and they didn't have enough water to last much longer. But they had refused. It not only meant Caspian breaking the oath he made when he was crowned but also abandoning the search for Rhince's family. And neither King was prepared to tell the sailor that they had given up.
Since the ladies stayed mostly inside, Lucy entertained their time by telling stories. Sometimes Ana would join in, having a few stories of her own. Lucy's favorite story to tell was one Ana had heard many times. But Gael enjoyed hearing how the four siblings found the world and came to be Kings and Queens of Narnia. Both reminisced about past adventures during the Golden Age, much to the young girl's delight. The stories helped keep their minds off the troublesome days.
But it couldn't last forever. There were only so many stories one could recount. And while they helped during the daytime, the magician's warning weighed heavily on Ana's mind at night. She suspected the others thought about it during the evening as well. It was obvious no one was sleeping the best and the terrible weather wasn't helping. They were constantly being tossed around due to the rough seas.
However, Ana seemed to have the worst time. Much to her dismay, the nightmares had returned shortly after leaving Coriakin's Island. She had hardly slept at all during the last thirteen days. The only consolation was that the others weren't getting much sleep either so they didn't pay much attention to her. The storm kept them occupied during the day and if Lucy noticed, Ana blamed it on the storm. But that fourteenth night...things took a drastic turn.
κ§ π½πππππ ππ πππ π«πππ π»ππππ ππ κ§
Whispers. That was when Ana first realized something was wrong. She was restless, unable to really sleepβnot truly wanting to. The longer she stayed awake, the longer Ana knew she could put off the impending nightmares. But she also knew she was beginning to run on fumes from the lack of sleep. Aside from Coriakin's warning, she had a mix of nightmares and flashbacks haunting her throughout the night. She was at a breaking point and she prayed that Aslan would allow her proper rest.
The conversation she had overheard forced her to keep the fact that the flashbacks had returned from her friends. Ana really didn't want to worry them, not when they had everything else to deal with. Besides, she thought she could handle this on her own. She was grateful the flashbacks had mostly disappeared during the day. Only a few popped up now and again, but no one seemed to notice. So it was easier to hide and pretend she wasn't having any more of them.
But night brought them back up, always tremendously worse than the previous night. As a result, Ana tried to force herself to stay awake so she wouldn't have to face them. But it got harder to hide the lack of sleep and she understood that they were beginning to suspect it wasn't the storm keeping her awake. Ana didn't think they realized that she wasn't sleeping at all, but they had definitely noticed a lack of good sleep. But then again, none of them had had proper sleep since the storm began.
She tried to resist sleeping, but it was too much for her body. Ana was at her limits and trying to push herself past them. Her body wasn't having it, however, and she soon fell asleep to dark whisperings in her ear.
'Worthless,' someone hissed. 'They don't care about you.'
'No,' Ana said, refusing to believe it.
'They abandoned you! Left you to fight all alone. Left you to rot in a cell for 300 years. How can you say they care about you?'
'Stop,' she pleaded. But the voice just laughed and faded into the distance. It was replaced by things she didn't remember happening. Ana was sure some of them weren't even real.
There was a man with a dark smile and cruel eyes. She hated how the look in his eyes made her squirm. He got off on the pain he inflicted, liked to see the terror in their eyes. He had a rack of tools he liked to use to beat them into submission. When he realized Ana wouldn't go easily, he took special care in tormenting her. Physically and mentally. He whispered dark things to her, taunting. Telling Ana what he would do once he broke her, telling her of the horrors he would have her inflict on others. Whispering how she was an animal and only meant to serve him. Her magic didn't belong to her but to him.
There was a woman, pale lips curling into a dark smile. Her emerald eyes held a burning hatred. She taunted her too, telling Ana how the others had abandoned her. How they thought she was a traitor and better off dead. Her cuts were meticulous and the injuries she inflicted were meant to be painful, but not life-threatening. Not yet at least. She needed information; things Ana couldn't give her. But she grew angry about the lack of answers. Then she cared more about inflicting pain than getting answers. Her hands curled around a whip and Ana closed her eyes.
More images of being trapped in the dark. Several men loomed over her. Their eyes were just as evil as the others, but their words and actions seemed far crueler. They called her anything and everything they could think of.
Animal. Monster. Filth. Unwanted. Unloved. Abandoned. Mutt. Beast.
One held a fire poker, its tip bright red as he had just pulled it from the flames. Two held Ana down as she struggled and the other pressed the tip against her skin. She withered and tried to get away, but there were hands all over her holding her down. Hands everywhere and she just wanted them off. One dragged Ana towards the flames, holding her head so close she could feel the heat coming off of it and knew her face was red from it.
She felt Phoenix fighting against her, wanting to be released. Ana held it back, not wanting to lash out in anger. She knew what would happen if she did. But they brought the poker to her skin once more and she couldn't help it. She screamed in agony and felt her magic pulse through her, rush to her aid. In a flash, Ana had lost all control and Phoenix took her place. She was locked inside, only able to watch as it lashed out, attacking the nearest man. But there was nothing Ana could do to stop it. It wouldn't let her out, trying to protect her.
Golden eyes leered down at the man who struggled against her. The others fled in horror, unsure how to control this creature. 'Please!' the man begged, pleading for his life. But Phoenix knew the harm he had caused. Her talons dug into the man's shoulders and Phoenix prepared to end his life.
'No! Ana, stop!' the man commanded and suddenly his features changed.
It was no longer the man that had been torturing her. Instead, it was Caspian. Stunned, Phoenix froze and Ana regained some control. She shoved it down and transformed back into herself. She pulled herself off of him and retreated to a corner, as far away as she could get. Horrorstruck, Ana could only stare at the blood beginning to stain his shirt. She had lost control and hurt her King, almost killed him. Her worst fear had come true and she was terrified. If she couldn't control Phoenix then she was a threat to them. She couldn't protect them from herself.
He stood and began to approach, hands up in a placating gesture. But by then Ana was too afraid of what would happen and she pushed herself away as far as possible, back hitting something hard. Her eyes fluttered to the door wondering if she could make it there without causing any more harm. She needed to get away. But two figures stood in the doorway, their faces blurry. They had witnessed her attacking the King.
She panicked and put her hands up to stop them from getting any closer. Tears were streaming down her face and she couldn't breathe. Her heart was beating so fast she could hear it in her ears. The figures got foggier and she was unable to discern who was who. She couldn't see, couldn't catch her breath. All Ana knew was she was trapped and had hurt one of the people she cared about most in the world.
Someone grabbed her wrists and she only vaguely noticed that someone had gotten close enough that she was hitting them. However, she was too far gone to put up much of a fight. Somewhere in the back of her mind, she realized she was going to pass out. But Ana couldn't regain control of her breathing. The darkness was preferable to what she had just done and she welcomed it.
Unexpectedly, Ana felt her body being shifted and suddenly her back wasn't against something hard. It was softer and it moved. Through the haze, Ana was able to realize it was someone's chest. They were taking slow, deep breaths. So, she closed her eyes, choosing to focus on that, and felt her breathing start to even out, matching theirs. As it slowed down, so did the pounding of her heart in her ears. It was only then that she was able to hear someone speaking softly.
"Easy, Ana," they were saying. "Just keep breathing. Just like that. You're safe. It was just a nightmare. No one is going to hurt you. I promise."
And suddenly everything faded away and the haze in her mind cleared, though Ana didn't open her eyes. She felt calmer, more at peace, and more aware. Ana noted that she had gone limp, being practically held in someone's lap. Strong arms pinned her arms at her sides while holding her close to their chest. She thought it might've been Caspian, but Ana wasn't used to such contact from him and it threw her off. And she couldn't feel any blood on her back from his injuries so she realized it could've been one of the other figures in the room. She didn't even know if they were still there.
Ana tried to open her eyes to see but found she had no strength left to do so. All her energy had been zapped by whatever had just happened and the lack of a good night's rest hit her all at once. She tried to fight it but felt herself drifting off, safe in the arms of whoever was holding her. And for once, the nightmares stayed away. She would have to deal with the repercussions of her actions later. For now, her body needed sleep.