Yay! I finally got this chapter done. My issue was trying to transition from the events of the last chapter to exploring the next island. In the movie, they just skipped right to it but I didn't think that would work in this case. So I had to find a way to transition without taking too much or too little time to focus on the aftermath. It ended up like this. Not everything is resolved but I promise it will be eventually.

This chapter is untitled at the moment since the changes made it hard for me to come up with something. So suggestions are welcome. Let me know if anything comes to mind while reading. :)

There is a POV change mid-conversation that's not obviously marked. This is because the only way I could articulate what I wanted was to go to a different perspective. Enjoy!

Chapter 13: Untitled

When Ana awoke it was dark but not pitch black like it would be if it was night. There was some light breaking through and she could hear sea birds chirping. She assumed the storm must have stopped sometime during the night. But she didn't even remember falling asleep. Could she be dreaming?

Confused, Ana cast her eyes around. She realized someone had untied the curtains and closed them around the bed, blocking out most of the natural light. That was not something she normally would do, preferring to wake with the sunrise. She slowly sat up and pushed the curtains open. Sunlight pierced through the cabin windows. Alarmed, she realized it was at least midday and no one had bothered to wake her. It was rare for her to sleep that late and found it strange no one came to fetch her.

She flipped the blankets off and climbed out of the bed. As soon as her feet hit the wooden floor, a rush of memories sent her stumbling back down into it. She realized she wasn't dreaming as the horrors of the previous evening came crashing down.

The nightmare. Voices. Phoenix. Seeing Caspian. Hurting him.

She choked back a sob, not wanting to face what she'd done. She had hurt her King, her friend. The person she was supposed to protect. Ana realized that not only was she a threat to them but she was trapped as well. They were on a ship in the middle of nowhere so she had no place to go. No place to flee to. With no signs of land, she would likely die before she got anywhere. But perhaps that was her fate anyway. She deserved it for attacking the King. Anyone else would suffer the same fate.

Ana didn't know what to do. She couldn't face them, not after what she did. Lucy and Edmund had to have been the other figures she recalled seeing. That meant they had witnessed her attacking Caspian. Losing control was not a good excuse for lashing out. She should be in control of her magic at all times. If she wasn't then that made her dangerous and unpredictable. It made her a threat to everyone on the ship and she needed to leave. She couldn't put innocent people at risk. But Ana didn't know how to leave without being confronted by someone.

Just then, a quiet knock interrupted her thoughts. Terror-filled eyes flashed to the door, thinking someone was coming to deliver her death sentence. But Ana quickly realized that none of the royals would order such a thing. They might want her off the ship, but none would order her death. It consoled her very little though.

When she didn't answer, the person knocked again.

"Ana?" Lucy whispered, poking her head around the door. Her face showed great concern, but Ana couldn't look at her. As soon as the Queen stepped into the room, she chose to focus on the floor. There was a feeling of unease in the room.

"You're awake," Lucy tried to continue as if nothing had happened. "We were starting to get worried." The tension only grew when Ana didn't respond. She approached cautiously. "Ana? Are you alright? Can you hear me?"

The sound of Lucy's voice started to fade into the background and images began to flood her mind. Ana shook her head to try and clear them. She had to stay in the present or who knew what would happen. A hand touched her shoulder and she flinched away from it.

"Don't touch me!" she hissed and the hand retracted quickly. Normally the people in her memories didn't listen to her.

Confused, Ana frowned and shook her head. She looked up to see Lucy regarding her carefully. Not the dark figures she would normally see. She noted that the young Queen seemed deeply troubled. Her brows were furrowed and she held her hand as if she had been burned. It only ceased to make Ana afraid that she somehow had been. That she had lost control again.

"Ana?" Lucy questioned, voice nearly breaking. She reached out to touch her again, but Ana moved quickly out of her reach. She didn't want to be touched by anyone until she could be sure she wouldn't hurt them. She would have to keep her distance in order to keep them safe.
"Whatever you saw..." Lucy tried to placate, "...It wasn't real. It—"
Ana violently shook her head, cutting off whatever she meant to say next. "It wasn't... Not all of it. I know it wasn't."

Lucy's face softened and she started to step forward. But she stopped when Ana moved away from her like a frightened animal. Then it dawned on her that Ana was afraid. Afraid of her. And that only made Lucy grow more concerned.

In all the years she had known her, it was very rare for Ana to show such blatant fear. She always did a good job of hiding how afraid she truly was. Often for the sake of others. But what was worse was that she was scared of Lucy, someone who could never be a threat to her. And if she was acting like that around her, seeing the others would only make it worse. The events of last night had made Ana terrified of people.

"What happened last night..." Lucy began but Ana cut her off again.
"You know what happened," she said, voice cold and distant.
She frowned, confused. "I don't—"
"You were there."
So she had remembered after all. Lucy wasn't sure if she would. "But that—"
"And what you didn't see," Ana continued, "you were told about."
"What?" Lucy was very confused now.
"Caspian told you."

There was a strange tone in her voice. Disappointment maybe. It took Lucy a moment but she realized Ana had overheard. She had known for weeks what Caspian had told Edmund and her. She didn't know how much Ana had heard, but she clearly felt betrayed by it. However, she had now told Lucy what her nightmare had been about.

"Ana..." Lucy tried to sympathize. She wanted her to understand they were merely concerned for her. "We were just worried about you. Caspian didn't want to tell us but we pushed him to..."

She saw Ana open her mouth to speak but her eyes flicked to the door. There was a brief flash of fear in them before her face went completely blank. Her walls were going back up. Lucy knew the boys had arrived, equally concerned, and Ana wasn't pleased to see them. She turned to the door to tell them to go away.

"Please... Just go," Ana pleaded instead. "I-I want to be alone right now."

Due to the pitiful look on her face and the way Ana spoke, Lucy was forced to nod. She sent her a concerned look before leaving. If she hadn't known the others were there, she would've run right into them. They were practically pressed against the door and it's a wonder they didn't fall into the room when she opened it. Lucy noted that Caspian tried to sneak a peek into the room, but she shut the door too quickly.

"Well?" he asked almost immediately.
Lucy cast a glance at the door before looking at him. "Not here... She can hear us."

Caspian nodded and led them to the Map Room. It was the only room aboard the ship where they could talk somewhat privately. Gael often occupied the Stateroom if she wasn't with Lucy or her father. But even if she wasn't present, the royals didn't want to risk her returning mid-conversation. So they always gathered in the Map Room. Up until Ana's revelation, Lucy had thought it was private enough.

"Well?" Caspian pressed again, as soon as the door was shut. He was anxious to hear about Ana.
Lucy pursed her lips, trying to decide what to tell them without betraying Ana's trust. She decided to just be honest. "She's awake... But not well. She flinched away from me. Ana was afraid of me."

Both Kings looked greatly disturbed by this news.

"She what?" Edmund spoke with distress. He knew it was very unlike Ana to display such emotions.
"I thought she was having another episode," Lucy tried to explain. "And when I went to comfort her, she recoiled from my touch. Her skin was hot and her voice... She sounded so scared."
"D-did she mention what happened? Does she... Does she remember?" Edmund questioned. Caspian was thus far silent, staring almost dumbfounded at Lucy.

At his question, Lucy hesitated. She didn't quite know how to tell them that Ana had eavesdropped. That her nightmare had been about the events Caspian spoke of.

"Lu?" Edmund asked when his sister didn't answer right away.
"I'm not sure what all she remembers," Lucy admitted. "But she knows we were there."
"What about...?" Caspian finally spoke, voice trailing off as waved his hand.
"Ana didn't say." She noted that Caspian absentmindedly rubbed at his chest and she frowned a little. "But she said her nightmares were about the time she was... t-tortured."
They both looked surprised but it was Caspian who spoke. "She admitted it?"
"Well... no. Not in those exact words."

Lucy watched as looks of confusion crossed the faces of the two Kings. But they let her speak before pressing for details.
"She doesn't want to talk about it. But she said I witnessed what her nightmare was about. What I didn't observe, I supposedly knew. It took me a moment, but I realized she knew." She looked at Caspian. "She knows that you told us. And she wasn't happy that you did."
Caspian looked a little abashed. "D-did she say anything else?"
Lucy shook her head. "She heard you two arrive and then asked me to leave. She's shutting us out... If I had to guess, she remembers everything and feels ashamed."

Edmund nodded his head in agreement while Caspian looked away. It seemed to Lucy that he felt guilty about what happened. But she didn't know why. He had no reason to feel guilty nor did Ana have any reason to be ashamed. She had been trapped in a nightmare and hadn't known they were there.

"What should we do?" Lucy asked, heart broken that Ana was alone in this. She didn't have to be; she chose to.
"We give her space," Edmund said.
"But—" she protested.
"Edmund's right," Caspian interjected. "She feels we betrayed her trust by talking about her behind her back. If we want her to come to us, we have to respect her wishes."
Edmund nodded. "She'll come around. She just needs to know we're here if she ever decides to talk. Trust me. I know from experience. She'll come when she's ready."

Lucy was forced to agree. She didn't like it, but she didn't have a choice. The sight she saw when they entered Ana's cabin was ingrained in her mind. But if Ana didn't wish to speak about it, there was nothing she could do. Lucy would just have to wait. And pray that Aslan would give her the words when the time came.

꧁ 𝑽𝒐𝒚𝒂𝒈𝒆 𝒐𝒇 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝑫𝒂𝒘𝒏 𝑻𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒅𝒆𝒓 ꧂

For two days, Ana avoided the others. She didn't want to see them. It would only make her feel worse about what she had done. This was a pretty easy task as long as she never left the room. She knew Lucy stopped at her door to check on her several times a day, but she never knocked. Never entered. Sometimes even Caspian would pass by. But like Lucy, he didn't make his presence known. She was given space and left alone.

Her meager ration was brought to her by someone. Sometimes it was Lucy other times it was a random sailor. But she barely touched it, too upset to eat. Ana could see the distress on Lucy's face whenever she took away the untouched food. She never said anything, however, and left the room in silence. Ana knew it was difficult for Lucy not to say anything and she was starting to miss the sound of her voice.

However, Ana knew she couldn't stay shut up in her room. It would only cease to make the situation worse. The others would start to grow concerned about her as well. It was bad enough that the royals were worried. She didn't want the whole crew fussing over her as well. So, by the afternoon of the third day, she decided to venture out onto the deck.

Steeling herself for the stares and questions, Ana opened the door. No one was in the hall and she breathed a sigh of relief. At least she wouldn't get bombarded right away. Hesitantly, she made her way outside.

The fresh air felt good on her face and she breathed it in. There weren't many people on the deck so her presence would be noticed rather quickly. Ana walked to the port side of the ship and leaned over the rail. She found watching the water to be soothing and it helped clear her head.

Soft pattering interrupted the moment. Ana looked over just in time to see Reepicheep join her.

"What a lovely afternoon," the Mouse squeaked. "Even more so now that you're out and about."
Ana smiled lightly, looking back towards the water. "It feels nice to be out."
He chuckled a little. "Am I to assume you had some kind of nightmare just as the rest of the crew did? Everyone's been quite shaken." She nodded. "And I assume it had something to do with the events of the past few years?"
Perceptive. Trust Reepicheep to get straight to the issue, Ana thought but didn't answer him.
"Well," he continued after she didn't speak. "You know you can always talk to me if you need to."
"You and anyone else on this ship," she muttered. But Reepicheep obviously heard.
"We all care about you, Ana."
She sighed. "I know..." Ana turned to face him, a small smile tugging at her lips. "Everyone but Eustace."
The Mouse laughed. "We're lucky if he cares about anyone aside from himself."

He stayed with her for a bit in silent comfort. But eventually, he scampered away and she was on her own. Ana turned to watch him go before casting her eyes around the ship. She didn't see any of the royals. She wasn't sure how she felt about that. A part of her was glad because she wouldn't have to face them. Another part was nervous because she knew she would eventually. The longer it dragged out, the more anxious she would get.

As if the mere thought could make them materialize, they did. The doors to the stern cabins opened. Caspian exited first, with Edmund and Lucy close behind. Ana gasped and turned so her back was to them. She felt her heart beating faster as her breaths grew quicker. She gripped the rail in an effort to ground her to reality as her vision swam.

They didn't notice her right away, much to her relief. It gave Ana time to take a few deep breaths and calm down. She didn't know why seeing them caused such a reaction. But she hoped it wouldn't be a common occurrence. Otherwise, she would have to keep herself locked up.

She wasn't sure who she was expecting first, but for some reason, she was thankful it wasn't Caspian. Even more so, that they didn't all approach at once.

"I do hope you're not planning on jumping overboard," Edmund spoke from behind, voice light. He was trying to joke while showing his concern that she might actually be contemplating it.
"Of course not," she answered.
"That's a relief," he said. "I'm not sure who would be more horrified by such an act."

Ana felt rather than saw him signal to the others. It seemed all three had been concerned that was her plan. Edmund was probably informing them that she wasn't about to throw herself into the sea. She didn't turn to see for sure. They weren't close enough to catch their conversation but she could still sense the two nearby.

Edmund approached the railing cautiously. When Ana didn't react, he relaxed and mimicked her position. Though his grip on the rail was much looser than hers. She held on so tightly that her fingers were starting to hurt and her knuckles were white. Ana forced herself to let go. But her posture was stiff. She was far from relaxed.

"Are you feeling better?" Edmund asked after a moment's pause. She nodded, not trusting her voice to speak. She wasn't sure what to say to him. "Lucy says you're not eating..."
"I—" she choked out. "I haven't been hungry is all."

It was obvious he didn't believe that. But he also didn't push the matter. Instead, he said something quite unexpected.

"I still think of her sometimes," Edmund stated, causing Ana's brow to furrow. She didn't follow the change in conversation. "Not all the time, thankfully. But if I'm alone on a cold night, my thoughts can wander to her. To her cells and those who suffered at her hand. That's why I don't like winter or the cold. They remind me too much of her."
Oh... Ana realized. He was talking about the one person he never talked about.
"And I know that I have no one to blame but myself for that... It probably only makes it worse."
"W-why are you telling me this?" Ana implored, concerned.
"Because she still haunts me. Trying to tempt me into doing something I know is unworthy. Telling me that I'm undeserving..." his voice caught a little and she was forced to look at him.
"But you're not," Ana reassured him. "You've more than atoned for that. But more importantly, Aslan has forgiven you. Nothing else matters."
He nodded. "I know. And for the most part, I believe it. But sometimes...she sneaks into my thoughts and tries to convince me otherwise."

Ana still wasn't sure why he decided to open up to her now. Especially since the events he spoke of were long buried. She suspected it had to do with what happened, but didn't understand how it related.

"All I'm trying to say is... We both have dark pasts, things we want to forget. I think we can relate better than most. But I couldn't get rid of them on my own and neither can you."
"I'm not..." she spoke, finally making the connection. "I talk to Aslan as I'm sure you did. I'll be fine..."
"I'm sure. But it might be best to try and let us help. We stumbled onto a very concerning sight and you had us all worried."

Ana nodded and looked away. She had been trying to think about what to say. An apology didn't seem quite acceptable. And she didn't know if she could tell them what happened if she wanted to.

"Are you—" she began, but the words got stuck. "Is everyone alright?"
"Everyone was really shaken at first. Lucy more than most... But she seems better now. She could do with a friend, though."
Ana took the hint and smiled a little. "I'll talk with her. I promise."

Whatever Edmund had been about to say was cut off by Eustace's arrival. He slammed a door shut—drawing everyone's attention—and stomped across the deck to confront his cousins. She felt Edmund's mood shift and heard groans from several crew members. It brought a smile to her face to know that he was still the same. She turned to face him while Edmund moved away from her.

"Eustace?" Lucy asked in concern.
"I'm starving!" the boy grumbled. "When can I get some decent food?"
"That's all you've talked about for days," Edmund reprimanded. "We're all hungry, Eustace. We have to ration the food to make sure everyone gets enough to eat."
Eustace groaned. "Well, I'm not getting enough! The rat and wild boar are probably stealing extra portions so the rest of us have to suffer."
"Really?" Caspian said, raising an eyebrow. "As I recall... You were the one caught stealing rations."

Eustace was taken aback by the accusation and tried to stutter out a response. Fortunately for the boy, the lookout's cry interrupted them. The two Kings left to investigate while Ana and Lucy tried to spot the island from the ship's edge. Ana could make out a small mass of land that appeared more vacant than Coriakin's Island.

But it was the only sign of land for over two weeks. So naturally, they would have to investigate. It may be their only chance of finding food. No one knew when they would make it to Ramandu's Island and they didn't have enough supplies to last.

So with a bit of hesitation on Ana's part, they climbed into the longboats and headed for shore.