Chapter 22- Cass Oceansong
"Get over here!"
Willow hid her candle before we got off the train, so the Peacekeepers don't know about it; instead of her candle, she's holding my arm, I think to hold herself up. I'm holding myself up too; my legs are wobbly and keep wanting to drop me down to the ground, like Aldera. The Peacekeeper that was holding Aldera dropped her when Buck started attacking the other Peacekeepers, and she hasn't gotten up.
"I said get over here!"
"Get off her, will you?" Volt says, holding onto a crying Keek. Most of the Peacekeepers are behind us with Buck and I think Aldar, but three are up ahead of us, trying to make us move.
"This is why we kicked your asses!" Osa shouts, still holding onto her side, while holding herself up on me too.
"Shut up and move." A Peacekeeper, a man with silver hair and a crooked nose, grabs Jet and throws him forwards, making him stagger. "Move, all of you!"
I'm trying to remember everything about home; my family, the ocean, Tempest; because the whole world is pushing in on me again. My ears feel empty because the train isn't in them anymore, but the screams and shouts behind us, and the sobbing all around me is making me shake harder than I think I already would. And the sky is too big after so long inside; the dark is pressing down on my head at the same time that the spotlights above us are blinding me.
I want to go home.
"You, walk." Another Peacekeeper, a woman with black hair, grabs the newest boy, Lar, by the back of his shirt and pushes him forward. "Are you all stupid? Walk!"
"You haven't told us where we're going," Rigg says.
"It doesn't matter to you."
"We're the ones going, so it obviously does," Volt adds, his arm still around Keek. Without warning, the woman Peacekeeper takes her gun and hits the handle of it into the middle of his shoulders.
"Shut up and walk." She looks at the rest of us, then points to Aldera, who's coughing and crying at the same time. "One of you get her."
"She's sick," Willow says quietly.
"And she's going to be dead, so it doesn't matter." The woman points at Flick. "Get her up and moving."
Flick stares at the Peacekeeper for a moment, then reaches over and down to pull Aldera to her feet. Willow squeezes my arm, her eyes wide. I don't know what's going on anymore; Buck is still shouting behind us, by the train car.
"Take this one!"
Together, we all look over to see Aldar jogging towards us, a bruise already forming on his cheek. "Get over there and keep walking," the silver haired Peacekeeper says, and Aldar just keeps jogging right past until he falls into step with Flick and Aldera.
Slowly, Willow starts walking, pulling me and Osa with her. I can't talk, I can't do anything but stare at everything that's happening around me; it's a different kind of cacophony than in the train. I don't know where we're going, and I don't know what's going to happen.
Curia, Beade, and Glow are all walking together; even though they look dazed like the rest of us, they still don't look scared. Jet and Cinder are straggling along, not with anyone, and Link and Rigg are walking alone too. The third Peacekeeper with us has hold of Sanguin's neck.
"What the hell is wrong with you?"
Sanguin doesn't say anything, just keeps making those horrible guttural moanings that he's made the whole journey. Aldar's taken Aldera away from Flick and has her on his back so he can carry her to wherever we're going. I like Aldar; I'm glad I shared with him on the train, and he was kind to give me bread in return.
"Where do you think they're going to take us?" I finally whisper. Willow shakes her head.
"Bet nowhere good," Osa says. I keep looking around to see where everyone else is; Link is right behind Curia and the others, and Silver has Violet close against her in the middle of the path. Lar is at the front, where the Peacekeeper threw him. Buck is still shouting behind us, and I can hear him slamming against the train car door.
Where is Oak?
"Willow, where did Oak go?" I whisper. Willow turns around then looks back at me.
"I don't know."
"We've got him! Get them hustling before we lose him!"
"Walk! Now!" The woman Peacekeeper grabs Willow and pulls her forward, taking Osa and me with her; sharp rocks and gravel are slipping into the loose sole of my shoe, but I can't stop to get it out. It's like when I got on the train, but this time I'm not crying. I don't think I can cry.
"Cass, do you need help?" Aldar asks.
"No. I'm okay." My legs keep trying to shake out from under me, but I have Willow and Osa to help me, just like I'm helping them. Volt is helping to keep Keek moving, because she has her face in her hands and she's still crying.
Where is District 4 from here? I don't know where the Capitol is, just that it's up in the mountains, but we've gone so far around Panem that I don't know where we are anymore. I want my family; I want my sisters and my mother and my father. I want to be on the Luna watching the stars; I can see some stars above me, but I don't know what they are without my father telling me.
"For god sake, get up you little bastard." The silver haired Peacekeeper grabs Lar from where he stumbled and fell and shoves him forward again. "Keep moving."
"Bastards!" Buck screams behind us, but it's muffled; I don't want to look back to see why. I just keep the rock in my hand squeezed tight into my palm; it hurts, but I need it somehow. Everything feels quiet in my head, like it's been stuffed with cotton; I can't really think.
"Silver, when do you think we'll be there?"
"Whenever they tell us we are," Silver says lightly, but I can hear the tremble in her voice.
"Why'd they choose that place?" one of the Peacekeepers says irritably behind me.
"It's close to where the old arena is, and nobody's using it."
The first Peacekeeper snorts. "Nobody's been using much of anything around here."
"Well apparently we are," Volt says.
"Do you want another one?" the woman Peacekeeper asks, holding her gun up again.
"Can you afford to lose another one of us?" Volt pulls Keek closer to him, just like Osa and Willow are pulling themselves closer to me. "You're already down three."
"One. We're down one."
"What do you mean we're down one?" Silver asks.
"We got two of your escapee friends," one of the Peacekeepers says behind us.
They haven't noticed that Oak is missing, so I think we're still missing two.
"Who'd they get?" Rigg asks.
"None of your damn business."
"See! I told you they wouldn't get away with it!" Beade says, almost triumphantly. For a moment, I expect Oak to start shouting at her, but then I remember that Oak isn't here.
"Thanks to you!" Osa says instead.
"She did what was right!" Glow snaps.
"I fought against idiots like you, so shut your mouths before I shut them for you," Link says.
"Drop it until tomorrow." The silver haired Peacekeeper pushes Link forward with the barrel of his gun; Link turns to say something to him, but closes it instead. Curia still hasn't said anything; she's just looking at us like she's weighing us.
My feet hurt so much, and my hand hurts because of the rock, but I don't want to drop it yet. I don't know where we're going but I don't want to get there; I want to go home! I keep hearing my father's voice, pleading for me to come home; he never sounded like that before. He never begged me before.
"So are we just walking to the edge of the Capitol, or are we going to keep walking until you get tired of marching us around?"
"I said shut it!"
I want to tell Volt to stop talking, but I don't think I can talk in front of these Peacekeepers. I don't know if I can talk at all; I just keep hearing Buck shout and the Peacekeepers hit Lar, and Aldera and Keek crying, and Sanguin moaning, and it's taking away my words.
Where did my handkerchief go? The one that Wave and Sea and Tempest gave me with my food in it. That was my last piece of home, because I took out my mother's braid. I don't know where District 4 is from here, and I don't know where we are now. I want to go home.
"Let's move! We're there!"
"So tell us where there is," Flick says.
"Shut it."
It's dark, but I can finally see a building up ahead, and the road under my feet isn't as rocky. There are still rocks in my shoes, and they're hurting my feet, but I can't stop to get them out.
"What is that?" Willow whispers.
"Nothing good," Osa whispers back. Her hair is wobbly, because she gave away so many of her hair pins.
Even Buck's quiet now, I think because we're all seeing where they're taking us. I'm so glad we're off the train, but I knew where we were going when we were on the train, at least after the first few days. I don't know what's going to happen now that we're here in the Capitol.
"It's a stable," Osa says, loud enough that everyone can hear her. "The last time I was in a barn I was blowing District 10's Peacekeepers to pieces."
"Don't hit her!" I scream, finally finding my voice in time to stop the Peacekeeper from hitting Osa in the head with her gun. "Please!"
"Drop the rock," the Peacekeeper snaps, pulling the rock I've been holding out of my hand and throwing it to the side. My hand stings now, but I won't say that it is. But the Peacekeeper leaves us alone.
"Right, inside!" The silver haired Peacekeeper is shouting, and suddenly there's a burst of light from inside the stable, because Osa is right. I've never seen a stable before, because I've never seen horses before, but I know what one is.
"Love the smell," Volt says, stepping inside. My eyes hurt from the light; I haven't been able to see properly in days.
"How are we parceling them out?" the silver haired Peacekeeper asks, looking at the woman with dark hair.
"He gets one of his own," she says, pointing at Buck. I look at Aldar, and he's still carrying Aldera, who isn't moving at all. "The others we'll sort out."
"What are we getting exactly?" Rigg asks.
"We're getting stalls, like the horses that are supposed to be here," Osa says.
"Smartass here gets away from her compatriots," the dark haired Peacekeeper says, and pulls Osa away from me. Willow holds on tighter to my other arm, and I'm glad, because without Osa holding me up I think I'm going to fall over. I'm so tired, and I can't even shout at them to bring Osa back.
"Get off me!"
"Right, get her; we'll put the thin ones together," the silver haired Peacekeeper says. "And get the boy into one by himself."
While the Peacekeepers half drag Buck further into the stable, the silver haired Peacekeeper pulls Aldera off of Aldar's back, even though she can't stand up.
"I can take her," Aldar starts, but the Peacekeeper squeezes Aldera's arm so tight she starts to cry again.
"Shut up boy, unless you want special treatment. You've got that bruise tonight; don't push it."
"Where do you want me, then?"
"Go after little smart ass."
"We're staying together." Silver is holding Violet around her shoulders and holding her hand too, and she looks so fierce that she looks completely different to when she was on the train. "Don't separate us."
"Bastards!"
One of the Peacekeepers that was with Buck comes back and takes Silver and Violet by the shoulders and leads them away, while a metallic clang comes from further in the stable.
"You two, together," the other Peacekeeper that was with Buck says, looking at Willow and me. "Come."
Willow and I are both holding each other up while we follow the Peacekeeper into the light and over dirty straw to a stall that already has Flick sitting in it. "Sit down and shut up."
"I'm over here." Osa's voice comes from a crack in the boards beside Flick.
"We're both here," Willow says quietly. The door to our stall slams shut with a clang, and it's darker in here than it was out in the walkway.
I think Buck is across the row from us, because I can hear him trying to move; they must have put more restraints on him, because if he didn't have them on he would be trying to break down the door like he was trying to on the train.
"Who's with you, Osa?" Willow asks.
"Aldar, and Rigg."
I'm so tired, and I'm so hungry, and I can't sit up anymore. Willow keeps sitting up, but I manage to get myself lying down, my head on Willow's lap.
"Don't put your head in the hay, you'll get lice," Osa says.
"Just lie down on me," Willow says. I nod, but I can't say anything else.
I can't stop thinking about my bed at home, and the food my mother would make us, even if we didn't always have enough. They always made sure we ate, even if my father had to steal the fish from the boat. It shouldn't be stealing, because we catch the fish, but the Capitol steals it from us, and now they've stolen me too.
Five more slams and clangs ring out, then the silver haired Peacekeeper says, "You'll get fed once we bring your friends in."
I can't hear anything but Sanguin's moaning, so Keek must have finally worn herself out from crying. Nobody's whispering either, and all I can hear is Willow's heartbeat through her lap and her breathing.
"Sit tight; the fun is tomorrow."
"I'm not going to kill anyone, Cass," Willow whispers. I cup my hand upwards to keep the cut from rubbing on the rough hay.
"I'm not either." I don't know how I'm going to get home if I don't kill anyone, but right now all I want to do is float away from everything. Float away like seaweed on the waves.
"You sleep, I'm okay."
I nod, because I can't say anything more. I want so much, but I can't have any of it.
I want to go home.