We soon arrived at Forks High, and I reluctantly exited Charlie's cruiser. To say I was nervous would be a severe understatement, I was worried about how everyone would react to me, especially the Cullens. Considering how Charlie was acting so differently than in the original story, I was worried how the Cullens were. It's unlikely that they drink human blood because of Carlisle's eyes, but who knows, maybe they do drink human blood, but only on occasion. Maybe they would drink my blood. Maybe they would find me irresistible, or repulsive, or intriguing. Maybe they would ignore me, or befriend me, or kill me. I had no idea what to expect from them, or from anyone else in this world. I felt like an intruder, a stranger, a freak.
Shaking away those thoughts before I lost my nerve and left, I walked to the office where I knew Ms. Cope would be. She was the school secretary, and she was supposed to give me my schedule and a map of the school. I hoped she would be nice and helpful, like she was in the books. But as soon as I entered the office, I realized that was not the case. "Hello?" I asked her quietly, trying to get her attention. She looked up from what she was doing in surprise. Before she spoke I saw that she looked very annoyed. She had a frown on her face, and she sighed heavily. She seemed to be in a bad mood, and I wondered if I had interrupted something important.
"Oh, hello, your Chief Swan's niece, Evangeline Meadows, right?" She guessed, she sounded and looked like she was bothered by my presence which was surprising, since she was depicted as being rather kind. She didn't smile, or greet me warmly, or ask me how I was. She just stared at me with a bored expression, and waited for me to confirm her guess. "Well?" she questioned while looking at me like I was dumb when I looked surprised by her attitude. She sounded impatient, and rude, and I felt a surge of anger. How dare she treat me like this, when I was new and nervous and in need of some guidance? How dare she act like I was a nuisance, when I was just doing what I was supposed to do? How dare she be so different from the character I had read about, and liked?
"Um…, yeah, that's me" I eventually answered, trying to keep my voice calm and polite. To be honest her attitude was getting on my nerves, I had never had much of an opinion on her character but I thought she was nice. Right now though, I really didn't like her. I wanted to tell her off, or walk away, or slap her. But I knew I couldn't do any of those things, because I needed her to give me my schedule. So I swallowed my pride, and my anger, and continued. "I'm here for my schedule" I stated with as much of an attitude she'd given me. I hoped she would get the hint, and stop being so mean to me. I hoped she would apologize, or at least be more civil. I hoped she would do her job, and let me go.
"I'd watch your attitude Missy" She said while giving me a dirty look, which I returned. She didn't seem to care about my feelings, or my needs, or my situation. She didn't seem to want to help me, or make me feel welcome, or be nice to me. She just seemed to want to make me feel bad, or angry, or scared. She was the worst secretary ever, and I hated her. I walked towards her to get my schedule which she held in her hand. I grabbed it, turned on my heel, and left. I didn't say thank you, or goodbye, or anything else. I just wanted to get away from her, and never see her again.
As I was leaving she said, "I hope you don't give your teachers that much of an attitude when you get them to sign your paper". She said it in a sarcastic tone, and I knew she was trying to insult me, or warn me, or threaten me. She was implying that I was rude, or disrespectful, or troublesome. She was suggesting that I would have problems, or conflicts, or consequences. She was being mean, and nasty, and spiteful. Instead of acknowledging her, I simply ignored her, and walked out the door. I didn't let her words affect me, or hurt me, or scare me. I didn't give her the satisfaction, or the power, or the attention. I just left her behind, and moved on.
I looked at my schedule, and saw that I had English first which means I would meet Eric Yorkie, Tyler Crowley, and the famous Bella Swan. I rolled my eyes, I never understood why people liked her. I think she's inconsiderate, and overrated. She's always whining, and complaining, and moping. She's always lying, and manipulating, and hurting. She's always dependent, and insecure, and selfish. She's not a heroine, or a role model, or a friend. She's a nuisance, and a burden, and a danger. But that's beside the point, right now I needed to find my way to class. I looked at the map that Ms. Cope had given me, and tried to figure out where I was supposed to go. I hoped I wouldn't get lost, or late, or embarrassed. I hoped I would find my class, my seat, and my peace. I hoped I would survive my first day at Forks High.
I got to class right before the bell rang, and asked Mr. Mason to sign my paper which he did, and I felt my face flush because I could practically feel the students' eyes on me. They were all staring at me, and whispering to each other, and making me feel self-conscious. They were all curious, judgmental, and rude. They made me feel like an outsider, a freak, and a nuisance. They made me wish I was invisible, silent, and gone. I was already uncomfortable, but I nearly died of embarrassment when he made me introduce myself. He said it was a tradition, and a courtesy, and a favor. He said it was for me, and for them, and for him. He said it was fun, easy, and quick. He said a lot of things, and I hated him for it. "Hi, I'm Evangeline" I murmured, and started walking to the seat that Mr. Mason said was mine, but he insisted that I tell more about myself. He said I had to say something interesting, personal, and memorable. He said I had to make an impression, a connection, and a statement. He said I had to be more than a name, a face, and a number. He said I had to be more, and I hated him for it. "…I moved here from Paris," I saw Mr. Mason's expectant look and continued, "I…like…dogs?". I said the first things that came to my mind, and hoped they would be enough. I said them without enthusiasm, or confidence, or pride. I said them without meaning, or feeling, or caring. I said them without being me, and I hated myself for it. Thankfully, that was enough and he let me go to my seat. He said I did well, and he was proud, and he was glad. He said I was brave, smart, and nice. He said I was a good student, a good person, and a good addition. He said a lot of things, and I didn't believe him. It was at that moment that I realized I was sitting next to Eric, and behind Bella and Mike. They were some of the characters from the Twilight saga, the books and movies that I had loved and hated. They were some of the people who had shaped my fantasies, and my nightmares, and my expectations. They were some of the people who had changed my life, and my world, and my destiny. They were some of the people who mattered, and I was excited and scared.
"Hey, I'm Eric Yorkie, your Evangeline right?" he said very enthusiastically, it seems he's at least kind of normal so far. Which is good, I'm glad not everyone is gonna be different. He said it with a smile, and a wink, and a nudge. He said it like he was friendly, funny, and cool. He said it like he wanted to be my friend, my guide, and my ally. He said it like he liked me, and I liked him back.
"Yeah, but you can call me Eva" I answered nicely. I was actually rather excited, I had always wanted to meet the Twilight characters. The actual characters, not whatever version of the few I'd met so far.
"Okay, Eva, it's really nice to meet you," he said with a huge smile on his face. "Are you really from Paris, I would have thought someone from Paris would have an accent, you know?" he asked exuberantly. He asked it with curiosity, admiration, and wonder. He asked it like he was impressed, intrigued, and amazed. He asked it like he wanted to know more, and more, and more. He asked it like he cared, and I cared too.
"Yeah, I am from Paris, but not Paris, France. I'm from Paris, Texas". I explained, people usually thought that. Even I thought that when I was really little. Somehow it didn't click that I lived in Texas not France, but my parents thought it was funny. They thought it was cute, adorable, and hilarious. They thought it was a joke, a coincidence, and a story. They thought it was something to laugh about, and to share, and to remember. They thought a lot of things, and I missed them. Gosh, I really miss them, I feel so bad that the last time I talked to them I was rather rude and dismissive. I was angry, impatient, and ungrateful. I was bored, restless, and rebellious. I was selfish, and stupid, and wrong. I was a bad daughter, a bad person, and a bad mistake. There were a lot of things, and I regretted them. I felt tears start to well in my eyes as I tried to hold them back. I felt sadness, guilt, and longing. I felt pain, remorse, and love. I felt a lot of things, and I wanted to cry.
"Oh, well, that's cool too. You kinda sound like you're from the south" Eric said, interrupting my thoughts, for which I was grateful. He said it with a chuckle, and a compliment, and a tease. He said it like he was amused, and charmed, and playful. He said it like he wanted to cheer me up, and make me smile, and make me happy. He said it like he was a friend, and I was grateful.
Throughout the rest of the class we talked earning us a few mean looks from Mr. Mason, but other than that not much happened. We talked about school, hobbies, and movies. We talked about a lot of things, and we had fun. I kept looking at Bella and Mike, I couldn't really hear what they were talking about, not that they were talking much, and if they were it was because Mike initiated the conversation. He was trying to flirt, and impress, and woo her. He was trying to be funny, charming, and romantic. He was trying to be her boyfriend, her lover, and her soulmate. He was trying a lot of things, and he was failing. She was ignoring him, and brushing him off, and shutting him down. She was acting bored, annoyed, and indifferent. She was acting like she didn't care, and she didn't want, and she didn't need. She was acting like she was above him, and everyone else, and everything else. She was acting like she was Bella, and I hated her. The class went by relatively fast, and before I knew it I was on my way to my next class. It was Government, which if I'm being honest, I don't have a clue as to what that class is about, but anyway. I hoped I wouldn't have to deal with Bella, or Mr. Mason, or anyone else. I hoped I would have Eric, or someone else, or no one else. I hoped I would have a good class, a good day, and a good life. I hoped for a lot of things, and I was optimistic. `
In my second class, which was Gov, I sat next to Bella and was very surprised by her disposition. I thought she sucked, but I never thought she was rude. Not really anyway, but throughout the entire class she glared at me and when we had to work together she only responded in short answers with an attitude. She acted like I was invading her space, or stealing her spotlight, or something. She was so hostile and unfriendly, and I didn't understand why. I'd wanted to yell at her to stop being an idiot when I read the books, and watched the movies, but right now I wanted to punch her in her stupid face. I wanted to make her stop looking at me like that. I wanted to show her that I was not afraid of her, or impressed by her, or interested in her. I wanted to make her leave me alone, and let me enjoy this crazy adventure. I was about to before the bell rang.
Third period trigonometry wasn't that great either because of Bella's constant glaring. It was one of my favorite subjects, and I was good at it. I liked solving problems, finding patterns, and applying formulas. I found it fun, challenging, and satisfying. But Bella ruined it for me, with her constant glaring. She made me feel uncomfortable, annoyed, and angry. She made me lose my focus, my confidence, and my joy. She made me hate trigonometry, and that's just not cool. Jessica was there and she talked to me a bit before Bella got there, and basically pulled Jessica away from me like I was diseased. She whispered something in her ear, and Jessica nodded and smiled. Then they walked away from me, and joined the other girls. I felt hurt and confused, and wondered what Bella had said to her. Did she lie about me, or warn her about me, or mock me? Did she make her think that I was weird, or dangerous, or boring? Did she ruin my chance of making a friend, or having some fun, or fitting in? I didn't know, and I didn't like it. And then I had to work with them because I didn't have a partner. We had to do some exercises on the board, and explain our solutions. When Bella had to talk to me she was rude, and I gave her back the same attitude she gave me. She barely looked at me, or listened to me, or helped me. She just muttered some words, or wrote some numbers, or rolled her eyes. She was useless, annoying, and frustrating. She made me do all the work, and take all the blame, and feel all the stress. She was the worst partner ever, and I hated her. Jessica looked a bit confused by the way we were acting, but ignored it. She probably thought we had some history, or some grudge, or some drama. She probably didn't care, or didn't want to get involved, or didn't know what to do. Which was strange since she's supposed to be a gossip. She just did her part, and smiled politely, and stayed neutral. She was nice, friendly, and harmless. But she was also weak, naive, and clueless. She didn't see Bella for what she was, or me for what I was, or the situation for what it was. She was oblivious. The class seemed to last forever unfortunately, but it eventually ended and I was on my way to gym.
Gym wasn't horrible, but it certainly wasn't good. I hate any type of physical exercise. I always get really flushed and out of breath, which is embarrassing. I feel like everyone is staring at me, judging me, and laughing at me. I feel like I'm weak, clumsy, and pathetic. I feel like I don't belong, and that I want to disappear. And the prospect of being flushed and out of breath was made even worse by the fact that Alice was there. She was one of the Cullens, the mysterious and beautiful family of vampires that I had somehow ended up in the same world with. She was petite, graceful, and cheerful. She was always smiling, dancing, and sparkling. She was everything I was not, and everything I wished I could be. I could've sworn Edward was supposed to be here but perhaps it's best he's not. He was Alice's brother, and the one who had caught my eye the most. He was handsome, charming, and mysterious. He was always brooding, and smirking, and dazzling. He was everything I wanted, and everything I feared. It would have been awful if Edward saw me like that, it's already horrible that I have to be in the gym in the first place with Edwad there, it just would've been worse. He would have seen me sweaty, and panting, and red. He would have seen me clumsy, and awkward, and boring. He would have seen me as a human, and a prey, and nothing. He would have seen me, and he would have hated me. We were playing volleyball apparently. I hated volleyball. I hated the ball, and the net, and the rules. I hated the hitting, and the catching, and the missing. I hated the team, the score, and the pressure. I hated everything about volleyball, and volleyball hated me back. Luckly, Alice didn't have time to pay much attention to me. She was too busy playing, winning, and having fun. She was too busy being perfect, and amazing, and awesome. She was too busy being Alice, and I was too busy being me. Usually, I would have jumped at the idea of talking to THE Alice Cullen, but not when I was red, and sweaty. I wanted to talk to her, befriend her, and learn from her. I wanted to ask her questions, and tell her stories, and share secrets. I wanted to be her friend, her sister, and her ally. But not when I was red, and sweaty. Not when I was ugly, gross, and disgusting. Not when I was me, and she was Alice. So, besides a megawatt smile and exuberant wave from her at the beginning of class that I responded to with a smaller smile and wave, we didn't interact much. To say gym sucked wouldn't be true, it was absolutely awful. It was painful, humiliating, and depressing. It was boring, frustrating, and exhausting. It was hell, and I hated it. Thank God it didn't last long. It felt like an eternity, but it was only an hour. It felt like a nightmare, but it was only a class. It felt like the end, but it was only the beginning. Thank God it didn't last long, but it lasted long enough.
Eric, Jessica, Tyler, who I'd met during Gov., and Mike wanted me to sit next to them, which I did. They were the first people who talked to me, and they seemed to like me. They were curious, enthusiastic, and welcoming. They asked me questions, and told me stories, and made me laugh. They made me feel comfortable, and happy, and accepted. They made me feel like I belonged, and that was nice. And it seemed Bella and Edward weren't together because she was sitting with us which makes sense since it was January 24th. So, I guess Edward just came back, and that means tomorrow the van incident will happen. Them not being together is both a good and bad thing. Good because Bella doesn't deserve Edward, and they never should've been together. Bad because now I have to deal with her glaring. While I was talking to everyone, minus Bella, I was waiting for the moment the Cullens would walk in. Which they did. I was blown away, they were all stunning. I don't know how no one ever questioned them being here. They were all so obviously different. From their unnaturally good looks, the way they moved, and the fact that their eye colors were all the same even though they were supposed to be adopted. It was amazing they'd been able to keep up the human facade for so long. They were beautiful, graceful, and mysterious. They were fascinating, intriguing, and captivating. They were everything I had imagined, and more.
Apparently, my staring had been obvious because I soon heard Jessica giggle and whisper, "I see you've noticed them? Those are the Cullens and the Hales. The big one with dark hair is Emmet, he's with the gorgeous blonde," she explained as they walked by. "The short pixie girl is with the blonde who looks like he's always in pain". She said their names and relationships, but she didn't say much else. She didn't say what they were, or why they were here, or how they were different. She didn't say anything that I didn't already know, or anything that I wanted to know. She just said the obvious, and the superficial, and the irrelevant. She was clueless, not to be mean or anything, I always liked her more than Bella. Anyway, so far they seemed to be acting normal, and now I was just waiting for Edward to walk in. When he did Jessica quickly told me who he was, "And that's Edward he's the only single one in the family, but don't bother trying to date him. Apparently no one in this school is good enough for him" she said, only a little bitterly. She said it like it was a fact, or a challenge, or a warning. She said it like she had tried, or wanted to try, or regretted not trying. She said it like she was jealous, or hurt, or resentful. And as she's said the last part I saw Edward smirk before looking at me, and faltering in his step. Wait, a vampire misstepping. I didn't even think that was possible, but whatever I guess. Edward quickly corrected himself and walked on to join his family at their table. But not before I saw his eyes, and his expression, and his reaction. He looked at me with curiosity, and surprise, and something else. He looked at me like he knew me, or wanted to know me, or needed to know me. He looked at me like he felt something.
"Yeah, I wouldn't even think about it if I were you, there's no way he would want to date you" Bella said sharply, snapping me out of my thoughts. Seriously, what's this chick's problem with me? I've never done anything to her. She said it with malice, spite, and venom. She said it like she hated me, or feared me, or envied me. She said it like she knew something, or suspected something, or guessed something. She sounded like she wanted to hurt me.
"Thanks Bella, I'm really glad you let me know" I said as sincerely as I could while looking at her with the biggest and fakest smile I'd ever given anyone. The phrase if looks could kill came to mind as she looked at me. She looked at me with anger, contempt, and loathing. She looked at me like she wanted to kill me, or make me suffer, or make me leave.
The rest of lunch passed by without much incident. I kept stealing glances at Edward though, and almost everytime he would either look at me, or he'd already been looking at me before I looked. I couldn't help it, I was drawn to him. He was so different, and so familiar, and so irresistible. He was so handsome, and so charming, and so mysterious. He was everything I had dreamed of, and more. I wondered what he was thinking, feeling, and wanting. I wondered if he liked me, or hated me, or ignored me. I wondered if he would talk to me, or avoid me, or approach me. I wondered what would happen, and what could happen, and what should happen. I wondered a lot of things. Suddenly, I thought, What if he can read my mind? I very quickly got my answer as I saw Edward's eyes widen at my thoughts, and my own eyes widened as I realized he could indeed read my mind. Great. He could read my mind, and he knew everything. He knew who I was, and where I came from, and why I was here. He knew what I knew, and what I felt, and what I wanted. He knew my secrets, and my fears, and my hopes. He knew me.
A/N: Hello, I hope you're having an amazing day, afternoon, or night, whatever, wherever you are. I really liked this chapter and hope you did as well. It's definitely longer than the others, which I hope you enjoy. And I don't mean to make you feel obligated to review, but it's really important at least for right now because for whatever reason I can't see the visitors or views for my story, only the follows, favorites, and reviews. So reviewing, following, and favoriting lets me know people are reading. I'm glad I figured this out cuz until today I had been considering discounting the story because it seemed like no one was reading it, but anyways I'd love to hear what you think. Bye xoxo.