you're losing me
Synopsis: unless you're choosing me.
Notes: I warned you all on tumblr, this isn't nice not happy, but I'm posting another surprise today so you'll be muchy and happy inside.
I do not own TVD, if I did, it would be Kalijah all the way.
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"I don't understand" Elijah tried. His eyes lost as his hand came in contact with the back of the chair to his right.
The room was half lit, streetlights came through the ceiling-to-floor widows but only barely and the lamps were adjusted to their medium.
Katherine faced him sighing, her hands running the jean cladding her long legs, the chocolate locks bouncing when she shook her head in almost disbelief.
"I know you don't"
The pair was in an deadlock. They had been sick for some time now, even though both have been trying to deny so.
Ever since Elijah given up, last minute, of letting Katherine go, they had gone away, for some years, Katherine had thought she would finally be free from his abusive family, from any supernatural problems, it would only be her and him living the dream in Europe, happily ever after.
They had bought a house, such beautiful rooms, illuminated parlors, opulent furniture, just the way she liked and the way he felt comfortable.
And for months now, she had even thought about fostering a child…
How foolish of her, huh?
Happily ever afters never happened for people like her, actually they were never for anyone before, how could she be so careless as to deliver herself so much in this preestablished fantasy?
She was smarter than that, after all.
So why she hadn't seen this coming?
Elijah's family reaching out
Sending pictures of his niece
Asking for some favor here and there…
He had been calling and she knew he had been visiting when they went to the U.S
Not that he was prohibited of doing so, it was his family.
But Elijah was a soldier for them, a mere peon for their battles, didn't matter if his safety was harmed or if the things he held dear, besides his relatives, were to be damaged on the process. His siblings thought he wasn't allowed to have feelings, or worries, things he held dear, besides them.
It was cruel
She was tired of it.
And being Katherine Pierce, she had already voiced all that to him.
How long could we be a sad song
'Til we were too far gone to bring back to life?
I gave you all my best me's, my endless empathy
And all I did was bleed as I tried to be the bravest soldier
Fighting in only your army, frontlines, don't you ignore me
I'm the best thing at this party (You're losing me)
"I don't get it!" she raised her hands in disbelief "why, why? Would want to go there and be their bitch again?! After everything, after their despicable deeds, after the shit your brother put you, and me, through!" her voice came out loud and clear, her eyes were sparkling but Elijah knew she wouldn't cry in front of him, even though telling him all that was hurting all damn much.
"They're family, Katerina," he tried and maintain himself calm for both of them, although when the words left his mouth he regretted them immediately, he opened his lips to go back but her eyes turned somber as she averted her look from his face
"And I'm what? What do I do with everything we built?" her voice a whisper her demeanor a shadow of what once she was.
Elijah sighed, how could he make her understand he wasn't saying goodbye forever, it was only farewell, he would be back soon, to her longing arms. He loved her. Deeply. For ages now.
And I'm fading, thinkin'
"Do something, babe, say something" (Say something)
"Lose something, babe, risk something" (You're losing me)
"Choose something, babe, I got nothing" (I got nothing)
"To believe, unless you're choosing me"
"I'm tired 'Lijah…" came her confession. "I survived so damn much until now, I've been to hell and back, caused pain and sadness, live and happiness, always rising from my own ashes and mending my wounds… alone," she resigned from standing and moved to the couch in front of him. Elijah thought of making a move, but stayed by the chair.
"When are you going to choose me?" Her voice nothing but a whisper.
"I did,"
She scoffed bitterly and rolled her eyes, tears treated to fall but she cleaned them with the back of her hand, her wedding band and engagement ring catching the low light from the room. It almost made her cry again. She hated being this vulnerable, even more so in front of him and because of people who didn't deserve one single more tear from her, but the feeling of abandonment was so grand, it burned her chest so profundos she couldn't think straight.
"Did you? And for how long?" Singing she leaned her grand in her hands "I wanna ask you to choose me, pick me, but it doesn't matter because you already made your decision,"
"Stop acting like I'm leaving you behind, Katerina, I'm not!" He exclaimed finally moving from the spot and bearing his wife.
She resented him and didn't spare him a look.
"You're a pathological people pleaser, a family prisioneiro an antagonist in your own story,"
"I'm not leaving you,"
"No, you're losing me," Katherine finally liked him in the eye.
"You don't want me to go, it that it? Say so and stop talking riddles," he was trying not being rude but he has to make her understand he wasn't leaving her behind, he just wanted to rekindle his family flame and he knew for a fact she wouldn't go, and he respected that, that was precisely why he would do that alone.
"It's not just that and you know it,"
And the air is thick with loss and indecision
I know my pain is such an imposition
Now, you're runnin' down the hallway
And you know what they all say
"Don't know what you got until it's gone"
"No, Katerina I don't," he matter of factly said his hands in his trousers pockets
"This says much already then," she got up and started walking out.
Every mornin', I glared at you with storms in my eyes
How can you say that you love someone you can't tell is dyin'?
I sent you signals and bit my nails down to the quick
My face was gray, but you wouldn't admit that we were sick
"If you walk out now, there's no mending this Laterjna, if you walk out on us like that everything would have been for nothing," his tone was final but she recognizes sadness.
She stopped at the door handle, her nails digging into her hands, lips pressing together, finally she opened the dole and left the best years of her life behind.
Stop (Stop, stop), you're losin' me
I can't find a pulse
My heart won't start anymore
Notes: Go read Woodvale if you haven't already
