"I realized then that even though, I was a tiny speck in an infinite cosmos, a blip on the timeline of eternity, I was not without purpose. And as long as I had a part in the music of the spheres, even if it was only a single grace note, I was not worthless. Nor was I alone."
R. J. Anderson
The Way The World Could Have Been
January 1998
The Forest of Dean
Hermione woke with a start. The daylight streamed into the tent through the thin material that had become her home for the last few months. The sheer exhaustion of the last few months had caught up with her and she had slept the whole night for the first time in many months.
The familiar rumble in her stomach signified it was morning and with great exertion she rolled herself from the bed, pulling on her jeans and a large jumper she pulled the large orange throw over herself and left the minor warmth of the tent to brave the snowy air.
To her surprise Harry wasn't sitting in front of the fire as she had been expecting. The embers of the fire signified he had been gone for some time. Immediately she began to panic. He had her wand, without it she had no way to keep the fire burning and no way to make to santise the water to make the pots of tea that kept the nagging hunger at bay.
The logical part of her brain tried to reassure her that he must have gone for a short walk and would be back in no time. Patience, perspective Hermione… the little voice whispered soothing her. But something in the air felt omnious. Her intuition told her something was wrong.
She waited and watched.
Minutes passed, followed by hours, and as the sun began to set again in the sky, the panic set in with the cold.
With the panic the fears of the worst rampaged through her mind.
What if something had happened to him, what if snatchers had taken him? What if he was hurt?
What if he like Ron had left her?
As the darkness took over the area she knew she needed to do something.
Taking a sheet of parchment and a quill she left a note on the table. "I went to look for you, I'll be back soon, if I don't see you out there I'll meet you back here. H"
Pulling her bag over her shoulder she packed the books and the large orange throw that had been her comfort, and walked into the night.
She dug her feet into the snow to leave a perfect trail to allow her to find her way back to the tent. She walked for what felt like hours occasionally calling Harry's name until she had gone well beyond the boundaries of her spells and enchantments. As the snow began to fall Hermione knew she needed to return to the tent.
Within moments it was a white out, everywhere she looked was a mirrored image of the alternative and if the panic hadn't already completely over taken her being it would do just that moments later when she lost her footing, sending her carening down the hillside and landing on the rocky terrain below.
Attempting to stand pain shot through her ankle, causing her to let out a loud scream. It wasn't broken, but could no longer support her own weight.
Suddenly everything in the world seemed hopeless, and Hermione Granger let out a series of violent sobs. She was cold, she was thirsty, she was unbareably hungry and more than anything, she was tired. Not tired for sleep, no she was so far beyond sleep.
She wished she could close her eyes and wake up in her childhood bedroom, before Professor McGonagall had turned up with "wonderful news".
She wished she could go back and slam the door in her teachers face, tell her parents to stop being ridiculous.
To tell Neville he should have taken better care of his pets and left him to it.
To wake up and find she had been sorted into Ravenclaw, to leave Ron and Harry to deal with their problems themselves.
To Oblivate herself and go to Australia with her mother and father.
"Hello beautiful, you look a little lost?"
The voice cut through her breakdown like fire in ice. She opened her eyes, three snatchers surrounded her. She recognised the faces as those who had been prowling around the tent several months ago looking for Ted Tonks and Dean.
"I… No … I…"
She couldn't breathe let alone speak, trying to stand jolted pain through her ankle once again.
"You look very familiar princess… what's your name?"
"Penelope Clearwater, halfblood" it was the first name that came to her mind.
"Check the list…" The tall one grabbed her arm, "Let me help you up… You can't sit in the snow all night."
She pulled her arm away, "I'm ok, I… I don't need help…"
"Hey I know you, you're Potter's Mudblood." The snatcher to her left lunged forward grabbing her arm. "There's a 5000 Galleon reward for her."
She could feel her heart beating in her chest, she needed to slip away, to find a way out. She needed Harry to find her.
"No … I'm not … I'm half…"
"Stupify"
And with that everything went black.
Malfoy Manor
The stench of dampness was the first thing she noticed as her world came back into focus.
The second was the face of Luna Lovegood who knelt in front of her.
"Hermione, are you ok?"
"Luna? Where am I?"
"We are in the Dungeons of the Malfoy's house."
"How did I get here?"
"A few hours ago, three men brought you in here… they were very cruel looking, threw you down on the floor and said they would be back."
That explained the nagging pain that covered her entire body. It was so dark, her eyes found it hard to see much past her and Luna.
"How long have you been here?"
"A few months… Mr Ollivander has been here much longer than I have…"
The sound of footsteps could be heard from the hallway, Luna pressed her fingers against her lips and slid into the darkness herself.
A wand illuminated the area as Draco Malfoy entered the room, he immediately turned to face her, his face paler than it had ever been before.
"So… the rumours are true, what are you doing here Granger?"
She thought better of giving a sarcastic response.
"I would have thought Potter and Weasley would be keeping you safe not letting you wander in the forrest by yourself?"
So did she. She could feel her lip wobbling.
"Not like you to be quiet… ok …well the Dark Lord wants to speak to you…" He dropped his gaze as he said the last statement.
"He's going to kill me isn't he…"
Draco's gaze remained on the floor, "I don't know… he just wants to know where Potter is… if you tell him …"
"He will still kill me…"
In a matter of seconds, the fear of death had gone replaced by acceptance, she knew it wasn't going to be quick. If nothing else it would be long and drawn out, it would be painful. But once it was over…
With a deep breath she stood, her ankle painful but she would never let him see her fear, he would never see her pain. He wouldn't get the satisfaction.
Walking the long staircase she watched as a group of people came into view in a marble hallway. Portraits surrounded the walls, whispers of filthy Mudblood followed her.
Voldemort stood at the head of the group, he was as terrifying as she remembered, as she approached he smiled widely and opened his arms wide to her.
"... and there she is… the brightest witch of her age… it is a delight to finally meet you…"
He stood waiting for her response, if she had intended to speak to him her heart beating in her mouth would have prevented it.
"You chose not to address me? Why?"
She stood still, attempting to look more confident and defiant than she felt.
"Crucio."
The pain soared through every inch of her body, coursing in her veins like knives. She bit her lip, stopping herself from screaming.
As he stopped she fell to the floor.
"We do not tolerate rudeness here Miss …"
"Granger" Draco said with a crackle in his voice.
"Granger… you must know that the only reason you are not being tried with the other's of your … status is your knowledge of Harry Potter. We are eager to know where he is and what he is doing."
She remained silent, she would tell them nothing.
"Well… if you will not tell me anything I have ways of making you talk…" He knelt in front of her, his wand ran along the line of her jaw. "... we can make this entirely unpleasant… or we can take the easy route…"
Hermione felt tears escape her eyes, she wanted him to kill her now, for this to be over.
"Narcissa, have one of the elves bring some tea and a vial of vertaserium… Crucio!"
She felt her muscles spasm repeatedly as she hit her head on the floor, her jaw tight and her eyes bugged from their sockets, and as though in a dream she heard him. For the first time in weeks, his voice drifted into her mind, he was desperate, screaming her name, hammering walls begging for it to be him. Over and over he called to her.
As the pain ebbed she felt his name falling from her lips, "Ron…"
"Who is Ron?" the noseless psychopath asked.
Draco cleared his throat again, his eyes were red and he looked pertcuilarly disturbed by the events unfolding in front of him. "I suspect it's Ronald Weasley my lord … Potter's ginger friend…"
"The Weasley's, they are pureblood, yes?"
"Yes my lord. Known Blood traitors"
He laughed heartily and a nervous chuckle trickled around the room, "The mudblood is in love with a Pureblood… How precious?"
The patter of feet on the floor signified the arrival of the house elf. Hermione focused on the patterns in the marble pillars, tracing the patterns in her mind.
"Sit up child."
Hermione remained still.
"Imperio,"
Her body moved of it's own fruition. Struggling to a stand before taking one of the high backed chairs in the corner of the room. He sat across from her, before inviting the house elf to pour their tea.
White china cups with delicate handles and a matching pot and milk jug.
"Sugar?"
She watched his face, there was sincerity in his question and for a moment she questioned the reality of her situation. Moments ago he had sent an unforgivable curse shooting through her veins, and now they were having tea. Surely at any moment she would wake up dazed in the snow, or better yet, in her bed in her childhood home. Surrounded by family like Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz.
Maybe she was suffering from some flu and she was ready to wake up 11 years old again, the last 7 years being some horrible fever dream.
But upon meeting his gaze she knew that this was no dream, it came close to a nightmare but there would be no waking up.
She nodded, "Two please."
She might as well enjoy her last cup of tea.
He smiled showing his serpentine yellowing teeth and gestured for the House Elf to add the sugar.
"Milk?"
"Please."
The elf added the milk and Hermione thanked him. The elf avoided her gaze as he added the clear liquid to her cup.
She knew enough about Vertaserum to know this would be difficult but if she could word her answers correctly then she could mislead him enough to avoid him knowing the truth about Harry's mission.
Taking the saucer in her hand she brought the cup to her lips and took a small sip. He shook his head and used his wand to tilt the cup forcing her to down the entire cup.
"Let's not be silly Miss Granger, remember I can make this most unpleasant for you."
It burned her mouth as the boiling liquid slid down her throat. She coughed and spluttered, while he watched.
"So, Miss Granger, where is our chosen one?"
"I don't know." It wasn't a conscience choice to answer, and it was the truth. She didn't know where he was.
"You have been travelling with him, yes?"
"Yes, for the last 7 months."
"Why have you been travelling?"
"He is looking for your horcruxes, he plans to destroy them."
Her hands slapped her face, there was no controlling this, no roundabout truths. As his face slipped from shock to anger, she cursed herself for her naivety. To think she could ever get around this.
"How does he know about those?"
"Dumbledore, when Lucius Malfoy planted the diary on Ginny Weasley to possess her and Harry destroyed it in the Chamber of Secrets, he knew it must be a part of you, he found the ring and destroyed it in the same way."
An anger like Hermione had never seen flared behind his snakelike eyes, his nostrils flared. He slapped her with such a force she saw stars.
"How many does he know about?"
"He doesn't know how many you have, he knows about the Diary, the Ring and the Locket. He has the locket…" her voice crackled as she felt herself continue. She tried to force herself to stop but no force on earth could prevent this.
Without warning, he screamed in frustration, shooting a green light at an man stood in the corner of the room, he dropped to the floor all life gone.
"Process her for the compound, section 3, no physical harm is to come to her until I give the word, I may need her again"
She didn't know what the Compound was but she couldn't imagine it was a pleasant place.
"Stupify."
She awoke several hours later completely naked on a metal table in a sterile white room.
Upon trying to move she discovered she was in a complete body bind.
Two female healers stood at the end of the bed writing various notes onto parchment. Floating in front of them were a series of diagnostic charms.
"Well she's not a virgin, shame she would have been worth a fortune if she had been pure"
The diagnostic charm flashed a variety symbols in front of the healers. A loud beep sounded and silence fell over the room.
"It can't be…"
"Do it again …"
They repeated the process they had just done and the small beep sounded again.
"Well Granger, you might have told us this before he tortured you…"
As the brown haired healer waved her wand the sound of a dull whooshing filled the room. It sounded like a train.
"Heartbeats fine, do an ultrasound."
Ultrasound… what were they talking about… heartbeat...
And, very suddenly, without warning the memory filled her mind and she was back in the treehouse that July night.
Before she could do the math a black image flashed before her and with it the profile of a baby… her baby. Their baby.
"Conceived in july… so … 7 months… she's small for being so far along… poor thing."
"Father is … pureblood, oh merlin who who lower themselves… Oh a Weasley that makes sense."
Her mind blanked and she was sure for a moment her body shut down. Staring at the small figure in front of her kicking and moving as thought it didn't have a care in the world.
The brown haired healer smirked at her, "This is why Mudblood's shouldn't be having children… sterilise them all that's my opinion… wouldn't want my child associating with this riff raff… Should be sending Weasley to Azkaban for tainting the bloodlines as well… I'll just go and let them know about the developments."
The brown haired witch walked away, and the blonde witch turned to Hermione. She gave a sympathetic smile.
"I take it you didn't know that you were pregnant sweets?"
Hermione couldn't move but the tear that fell was enough of an answer. The healer pulled a cover over her and gave a small squeeze of her hand.
"Do you want to know what it is?"
Hermione blinked. She did, but she didn't know why, it was what you did, when you found out you were having a baby, right?
"A baby girl"
A conversation a life time ago played in her mind. Rose. Their little Rose.
"I'm sorry this is happening to you." The healer touched her stomach but pulled her hand away quickly as hurried footsteps could be heard in the hallway, Narcissa and Draco Malfoy burst into the room.
"Show me,"
The blonde witch did the charm again and her baby appeared before her.
Narcissa pressed her hand to her face, Draco looked dumbfounded. He watched her child intensely.
"When is the child due to be born."
"Early March, mi Lady."
"When Mercury is in Pisces and Neptune in the 12th." Narcissa whispered to no one in particular, the two Malfoys shared a knowing look. "Give her some food and hydrate her before you dress her, and take her to room 3, we must speak with the Dark Lord before we proceed."
The next few weeks blurred into one long nightmare.
She found herself alone and locked in a room that reminded her of a hospital ward for 23 hours of the day. Narcissa took it upon herself to supervise the remaining hour of the day, most days involved an hour long walk around the gardens where she took it upon herself to educate Hermione on each of the hundreds of flowers that grew and stories of the sculptures as they walked, before returning her to the room that had become her prison.
She often had to remind herself that it wasn't all bad, she was fed four meals a day per recommendation from the healers and made to hydrate herself, she allowed herself time to process the events that had preceded.
As her body nourished itself she felt her body changing, a small belly formed and with the acknowledgement of her presence her babies kicks followed quickly after. Soft spoken conversations in the wee hours of the night when it was just the two of them, allowed her to bond with her unborn child.
In the dark of the night, she wondered if Harry had returned to the tent, she worried how he would have reacted to her absence, and what would have made him leave her alone.
She imagined the conversations she would have with Ron, she imagined the arguments that would ensue and in those dark moments she recognised she would give anything to be able to have those arguments no matter how heated.
Her dreams were vivid and cruel, she would wake up in his arms before being ripped back to reality.
He would rescue her only to tell her he never wanted her throwing her back into the manor.
Their daughter with her wild red curls would run from her, she called out "Mummy", turning as the sun beamed down blurring her face.
Some nights they returned to the Burrow, and Rose would run into his outstretched arms, they would spin around until Hermione reached them. As she joined them, the world around her crumbled into a barren landscape a green light hit them and they fell to the ground like crumpled marionette puppets.
She woke with a start one February morning to find Draco Malfoy stood at the end of her bed.
He surveyed her with pity before informing her that his mother was otherwise engaged and he had volunteered to take the position of ward on her walk today.
"I'd rather just stay here," Hermione quipped back, lying down once more pulling the covers over her head.
"You don't really have a choice, "His" orders,"
"He has me imprisoned and is threatening to take my baby. He doesn't get to order me to walk as well Draco."
"Can you stop making this difficult? I don't exactly want to have the job of walking you either but we are here and I'm a damn sight better option than him."
The threat of him was enough to prompt Hermione to submit.
"Fine, but don't expect conversation."
"Do you promise?"
Throwing the cover back she heaved herself from the bed, stretching widely, cracking her aching back in the process, and her hands rested on her back pushing out her stomach.
His eyes fell to her stomach, and she watched him staring at her.
"What" she spat.
"What did you ever see in him?" a hint of something flickered in his voice but she couldn't put her finger on it.
"That's none of your business, now do you mind getting out while I change."
Draco raised his eyebrow "I'll be outside the door."
They walked in awkward silence side by side around the now familiar topiary of the sprawling gardens.
She breathed deeply enjoying the fresh air while she could. A sharp painful kick to her side made her stop suddenly.
She felt Draco grabbing her arm, "Are you ok?"
She yanked her arm from him, "Yes I'm fine, just winded." She looked at him with utter disdain, it was too late for pleasantries.
"Do you want to sit down?" her head said no, but the ache inside her answered for her.
"Yes," she said sharply "... please …"
Draco transfigured a nearby bush into a bench and motioned for her to sit, to which she obliged.
"You're not … you know?" Draco looked awkwardly at her from the corner of his eye.
"What?"
"Having it?"
"I'm not in labour, no… well I don't think I am…"
Another silence ensued. This time Hermione was the one to break it. "Why do they want my baby"
He leaned his elbows onto his knees and twisted his wand between his hands.
"I'm sure you know there was a prophecy, the one that foretold Potter would be the "Chosen One"."
She nodded. "The one your father destroyed in the Department of Mysteries."
"Well, yes. But there was more to it than Potter, that was part of the reason "He" wanted it so badly. It was rumoured to have said "There will be two. A boy born in the closing days of July. His parents defied him 3 times and lived to tell the tale and a girl born of the sacred the join of highest and lowest rank. When Mercury is in Pisces and Neptune in the 12th. She will deliver the final blow and end his reign in fire and flames. Two of the three will survive, together they will be the final rulers of the Hallows." He was convinced that having the prophecy would give him more information about where or who the other half of the prophecy was."
"So it might not be her?"
Draco nodded, "It could be any child anywhere, but your dates match that of the prophecy and given the make up of it's blood…"
"What if I say it's not Ron's… I could say I don't know who the father is or that he isn't a pureblood?"
"The healer's already confirmed who the father is, the charm shows paternity and blood status."
Another silence fell over them, the white peacocks wandered freely amongst the trees pecking at the ground intermittently.
"I never thought you would be stupid enough to get pregnant Granger."
Her first thought was to fire back, to defend herself but in that moment she agreed. She had never thought she would have been stupid enough to put herself in this position either. But life had a way of giving you exactly what you needed at the exact point that you need it and for Hermione the child that grew inside her had a purpose higher than she could imagine. She could only hope that she would be allowed enough time to protect her, to see what that purpose was, and to reunite with Ron long enough to tell him of the life they had made together.
"You've never been in love have you Draco" she said with a sigh.
"I have…"
She stood slowly, ready to continue the walk.
"What are they going to do to her?" She wasn't sure she wanted to know the answer.
"As far as mother is concerned, he wants to raise her as his own. If the prophecy is to be believed she will either destroy him along side Potter or she will help him destroy Potter. I believe he wants her to do the latter."
"... and what are they going to do to me…"
"The compound…"
The last stretch of the walk was taken in complete silence as Hermione processed the horrors that could await her, as they rounded the corridor to her room again Draco opened the door for her allowing her entry first. How chivelrous of him.
"They are moving you back to the dungeon tomorrow… you are to … have her there"
"Why?"
""His" orders…"
He stood for a little too long before stating "I'm sorry for this Granger… if I can do anything to make your stay here better,"
Internally she scoffed. She wanted to shout and scream at him for being so naive.
"Parchment…"
"Parchment?"
"Yes and ink, I have some letters I need to write…"
"I won't be able to send them…"
"They don't need to be sent, just kept… that's the least you can do for me isn't it Draco"
1st March 1998
Her cry signified the end of three long days of labour and as her baby was placed on her chest she gave a triumphant laugh. She had always known in her heart that it would end on his birthday, it had to, Rose was the greatest gift she could give him.
She pulled the girl to her chest, holding her close to keep her warm as she nuzzled her cheek against the damp hair of the daughter she could only pray he would get to meet.
"You did it, Hermione, you have a daughter, a beautiful little girl." Luna smiled as she rubbed the babies back as she lay on Hermione's bare chest.
"Rose… my little Rose"
"Beautiful name Hermione…"
She gazed at her daughter, in the light of the candle she could see her bright red hair illuminating her world with colour, in her mind she could feel Ron kissing her face, telling her she had done so well… a fever dream she was happy to indulge "You have your daddy's hair…"
She wanted Ron, she wanted him to barrel into the room wand raised to save them both.
But she knew they were passed that stage… if he had known where to come he would have been here by now…
"Happy birthday, Ron…" Hermione heard herself whisper, stroking her baby's face and fingers, Luna brought a blanket to wrap Rose in.
The cries faded to a whimper and there was an odd tranquility in the air. She felt her daughter breathing on her chest as the pain of the last few days became a distant memory.
The door opened, with a squeak and Hermione felt herself jump up from the bed. She had almost been allowed to forget where she was.
Narcissa and Draco Malfoy entered flooding the room with light from their wands. Rushing to cover herself, before attempting to stand to get away again, if she could get passed them she could make a run for it, she stood a chance.
Hermione knew she needed to protect the little girl in her arms, over her dead body would they take her.
"Sit down,you silly girl" hissed Narcissa "Hand her to me."
"You aren't taking her…"
Draco held his hand out to encourage his mother to retreat before he stood infront of Hermione.
"Hermione, I suggest you not try to be a hero here. You have no wand, its been a long … process for you and you are bleeding heavily." He nodded at the red pool now appearing at her feet, darkening dirt floor, suddenly feeling light headed she sat on the floor again, maybe if she complied they would let her keep Rose with her.
"Neither Harry nor Ron know you are here and they know nothing about her and …" he leaned in closer to whisper to her. "...we have no way to tell them…" He had never in the 6 years of acquaintance called them Harry and Ron, it felt wrong that he should start now.
He met her gaze. "They might come looking for you but there is no way for them or you to win this. Hand her over and I promise I will look after her. If you don't, he will come for her and none of us want that. "
Draco had desperation in his voice, but Hermione's resolve remained strong. She clung to her baby.
"She's the only thing, I have left." She sobbed taking in every moment. "You've already taken everything else, You can't take her from me too Draco."
"If I could change this I would…" There was a moment's silence "They will kill my family if I don't do what they want…" their eyes met again, a shared sadness and regret and for a moment she felt sorry for him.
She took in her daughters tiny features in the light of their wands. Her hair curled around her face in tight ringlets, her small nose scrunched and her rosebud lips pouted in the cold. Even covered in gunk she had to be the most beautiful thing in the world. A perfect mix of them both, without the flaws and trauma. Hermione planted a kiss on her forehead, knowing despite her wishes this may be the first and last kiss she ever would give her.
"Avada Kadava,"
Rose opened her eyes as the darkness came for Hermione.
A flicker of understanding, as she handed over the baton to her daughter.
A legacy she never asked for.
A quest she couldn't have agreed to.
At only minutes old the weight on her shoulders was immense but it a final defiant act Hermione gave her daughter a final gift.
As life slipped from Hermione's eyes, Draco caught Rose before she tumbled from her mother's arms. Her cord still intact, he watched as light travelled the length of it and into the tiny crying infant.
"What was that?" Draco asked his mother.
"You weren't supposed to kill her Draco, he could have your head for this."
"I couldn't …"
"Enough … She tried to fight back… she tried to hurt the girl… Sever the cord quickly, we need to leave here now."
Luna sobbed in the darkness as Draco cut the bond between them. "She would be going to the compound Luna. It's kinder for her to go quickly… sometimes death is a mercy."
"Her name is Rose," the small Irish whisper came from the darkness and he stopped in the doorway looking at the tiny infant now grizzling in his arms. She was so small, innocent and pure and about to go into a world that would destroy her before the door slammed shut.
2nd March 1998
Ron woke with a start, as the bright white room came into view. Something filled his throat, suffocating him. He tried to pull it out, his hands nipped and stung, something was stabbing his hand.
"Ron, it's ok me and dad are here" his mothers voice cracked as she stroked his arm.
Someone in a white uniform was at his bedside. "Ron sweetie, my name is Nurse Julia. I've been looking after you for the last few months. I'm going to take the ventilation tube from your mouth, it might scratch a little but that's normal."
His body ached, and burned. He was confused and exhausted, his mother was sat in the chair next to his and his father stood behind her.
"I'm going to go and get a fresh chart, I'll be back in a few moments, that'll give you a little time to chat."
His mum thanked the nurse before turning her attention back to him.
"Where am I?"
"You are in hospital dear…" she leaned in and whispered "... a muggle hospital"
A muggle hospital? How? Ron couldn't remember being ill. The last thing he remembered was the pain of being splinched, and now he was here. If he was here where were Harry and Hermione… the quest from Dumbledore…
"Where are…" he started before being consumed by a fit of coughing, his throat ached.
His father poured a glass of water for him.
"Harry is at home, he's safe."
"'Mione?" he croaked. His mum let out a sob and took his hand, his dad shifted uncomfortably, his face grey and pale.
"We don't know sweet boy, our last intelligence suggested … ."
"Not now Arthur… please…"
"We need to tell him the truth Molly…"
"Not now Arthur … please.."
"What truth… Where is Hermione?"
"She was captured by snatchers, intelligence on the inside tells us she..."
"She what…"
"... didn't make it."
Ron didn't remember much of the events of the next few months, it felt like a nightmare. Over the next few years his mother would repeat them over and over to him when it became too real.
He remembered the nightmare beginning.
He remembered the sound of the machine crashing to the floor as he ripped the tubes from his hands.
He remembered the sound of someone screaming her name.
He remembered the moment he recognised it was him screaming for her.
He remembered the sharp prick in his thigh as a muggle nurse shouted "sedate him" as the darkness took hold of him.
He remembered waking for the second time to the reality of his nightmare.
He remembered the nurse telling him about the little ball of light that appeared from the Deluminator.
He remembered the emptiness.
And every morning when he opened his eyes he remembered… it was all real. It was always real.
16