The big black dog sitting by the stove looked far more guilty than any canine should as he begged for scraps. After all, there comes a time in every prankster's career where they inevitably come to the conclusion that they have pushed their luck a little too far. Sirius was wallowing in the misery of that realization even as his cousin stirred what promised to be an ordinary lunch. The last week had gone a long way toward affirming that verdict, a very long way, if he were being honest.

Though she was nothing but courteous toward the new young woman in her life, Andi wore a perpetual frown to tamp down the anger that bubbled and simmered just below the surface. It was apparent for all to observe that she was not happy with being pushed to share what, by all rights, should be hers and hers alone. Everyone was walking on proverbial eggshells, everyone, that is, except for Luna. That girl had the survival instincts of a flobber worm. It was, therefore, a miraculous surprise when she managed to navigate the entire affair unscathed. Somehow, the little blonde was the only one able to draw the occasional smile from Andi.

It might have been made worse by the fact that concessions had needed to be made. With the guest room being occupied by the twins and Luna; it had been decided that Gloria would be sharing Ted's and Andi's bed. Andi had made it quite clear what body parts Ted would be missing if he were to eschew monogamy, piling more stress on an already tense situation. With his sensitive nose, Sirius was sure that no nighttime activities had taken place in that bedroom.

In his godson's bedroom, well, that was a different matter. Nymphadora had threatened to re-dose Harry with anti-libido potions on more than one occasion. Her smile, though, was more than enough to give lie to that threat. Who would have guessed that unleashing a teenage boy's instincts and then giving him unlimited access to a means of satisfying those instincts could have that outcome?

Sirius was not jealous in the least. Really, he wasn't.

Aside from the Andi situation, things had been going swimmingly. True, the Malfoys had settled the debts for all of the loans Narcissa had authorized, exactly as anticipated. However, before they could announce that they were doing so, an offer had been made to all of the debtors. Without exception, that olive branch had been accepted by every family that could manage to send a representative to the goblins, leaving outliers only with those who had been too indisposed to attend the meetings. That tactic had blunted any influence the Malfoys may have gained by making good on their promises, while still relieving them of a sizable portion of their assets, not to mention the likelihood that it would help disrupt any future plans from the dark lord. Sirius was looking forward to stripping those families of their magics once they inevitably reneged on their new contracts.

Life was good.

As for the children, they were enjoying their summer. Nymphadora was having a spectacular time introducing them to the wonders of the muggle world. Movies and strange foods filled their days. They even went to something called an amusement park. They had returned flushed and excited, proving that the name was justly earned. Though to be fair, Sirius was convinced that Harry found much more amusement that evening in his own bed.

Sirius was definitely not jealous.

To be honest, he was worried. Andi only seemed to be getting angrier as the days progressed, which is why, the day before, he had decided to do some damage control. The way things were going, he had to do something before somebody got hurt; namely, himself. This gave rise to the decision that it was time to lie like a two-year-old caught with their hand in the biscuit jar. Thus, he had sent a letter that would hopefully be arriving soon. Luckily, he had some decidedly unconventional material to work with.

Walking away from the stove, a pot of soup in hand, Andi called out, "Children! Ted! Gloria! Come eat!" Sirius wagged his tail as he marveled at the behavior. It was something of which his mother would never approve, from the shouting to even the cooking of a meal in the first place. Andi had picked up some habits that went against her upbringing.

By the time Andi had set out the soup alongside some fresh rolls, the rest of the household had arranged themselves around the table. Wary looks dominated everyone's faces.

"It smells good dear," Ted said, trying to lighten the mood.

"Flatterer." Andi said. "I have told you; I am not angry with you."

"That doesn't mean I can't compliment your cawl cennin."

"It does smell good, Mum," Nymphadora said, reaching for the ladle protruding from the steaming pot of soup.

"It will probably taste good too," Harry quickly added. He still had that goofy grin he'd been sporting the last couple of days.

Sirius was not jealous.

"Thank you." Andi said. "I appreciate the appreciation."

"I could cook supper if you like." Harry tried his luck.

"No, you need to spend time with your girls." Andi dismissed the offer.

"Harry spends most of his time with Dora." Luna noted. "She says I'm too young to have that kind of fun with him yet."

"Harry, you do need to spread your attentions some," Ted said, grabbing a roll. "Everything doesn't need to be that type of fun."

"I know." Harry blushed. "Sorry, I didn't mean to be so rude."

"We are just patiently awaiting our turn." Hestia said.

"What?" Harry blurted.

"Don't think we haven't noticed that Dora hasn't been able to walk straight for the past three days." Flora added.

"You two are getting to be as bad as Hermione," Andi said as the twins giggled.

"Yeah, well," Nymphadora grumbled, "They'll just have to wait their turn."

"I. . . Um . . . What?" Harry intelligently added.

"Have you neglected to inform your husband of his other duties?" Andi asked her daughter.

Nymphadora sulked. "I assumed that Hermione was ahead of them in line."

"I… Um… What?" Harry intelligently added.

"Why'd you think we were here?" Flora asked Harry.

"Ah . . . Err . . . Um . . ." said Harry.

There was a tapping on the window that conveniently saved Harry from having to answer the question.

"I'll get it," Ted said leaping from his seat. He hurriedly crossed the room and let an owl in. The bird quickly flew to land on the table near Andi.

"I am getting the impression that you have yet to internalize the situation you find yourself in," Andi said, taking the letter the owl had been carrying.

"I. . . It. . ." Harry stumbled for words. "It's all kind of new to me."

"You have been unceremoniously dumped into the deep end." Ted nodded as he sent a glance Gloria's way.

"It's from Sirius," Andi said, opening the letter and subsequently halting all conversation at the table.

A minute passed before Andi slammed the letter onto the table. In a swift motion she swept up her glass and hurtled it toward the wall, liquid and all. The owl squawked, though it had been nowhere near the flight path. It took wing and landed on the ledge to peck at the window in a desperate attempt to be let out.

"Bad news?" Flora asked as her sister went over to open the window for the bird did not relish the possibility of being consigned to tandori.

"That utter. . ." Andi seethed. "Sirius has just made it impossible for me to be mad at him."

"I don't think that phrase means what you think it means," Ted said, looking at the shards of glass now embedded in the wall.

Andi took a deep breath before standing. "Ted . . . Gloria . . . Come with me. We need to have a discussion." She then stalked from the room followed closely by the two she had named.

After watching them leave the room, Flora snatched up the discarded letter.

"Read it out loud." Nymphadora commanded as the other girl brought the parchment toward her face.

"Okay, Dear cousin Andi," Flora started. "Things are going according to plan. Most of the Death Munchers who have taken illicit loans from the Black family vaults are now bound by magical contract not to oppose our family. Even hinting at supporting the dark wanker in any way is enough for us to call forth the penalties and revoke their magic. I hereby authorize you to act in my stead if such an opportunity arises. Make them quake at the thought of defying the Blacks.

On a more personal note; I am unable to procure young Dudley for your pleasures. I simply have no leverage on that front. Let us be honest; he is much too young for you at this point. On the brighter side, Gloria practically fell into my lap. She should already be signed over to you and your husband, so this should not come as a surprise. While it is no guarantee that you will have the same relationship with her this time around, I am happy to provide you with the opportunity. And, yes, you will have to share her with Ted. Since you have already shared her with Dudley, I trust this will not be a sacrifice.

Again, I am sorry that I could do nothing in regards to your beau. He is much too young at this point and you still have Ted, so that wouldn't work out anyway. Let him be with his first wife and be happy for him.

Love your exceedingly good-looking cousin and lord, Sirius Black."

The boy's life had recently been turned upside down. Well, maybe not upside down, but he was suffering through some staggering changes. He was regretting wishing that his life could be as interesting as his best mate's.

Somehow fate had heard and decided to make his summer more outrageous than Harry's could ever possibly be. Just like that, out of the blue, he was engaged, possibly twice over. It had been decided that the twins, and he didn't mean his brothers, were to attend Hogwarts with him. Ostensibly, this would give him time to get to know them before deciding which, if not both, he would eventually marry. There had been talk of a dowry or dowries as the case may be, but truthfully, he had been too distracted by the word 'marriage' to pay much attention to that conversation.

Instinctively, he had sought solitude to chew over his new reality, finding a spot in the shade of a palm tree. However, he did not find the privacy he needed. Instead, the twins, his brothers, found him.

"This is where you got to." The first twin spoke and per habit, Ron labeled him "George" for the remainder of the conversation.

"You'd almost think you were hiding . . ." said Fred.

". . . when you should be spending time getting to know your fiancées," George admonished.

"Leave off," Ron snarled looking at the ground.

"Don't be like that, little brother," Fred said.

"We only want to give you, our congratulations," George supplied.

"And condolences," Fred added with a grin.

"Having a couple of birds dropped in your lap like this." George wiped a pretend tear away from his eye. "We couldn't be prouder."

"Or more jealous," Fred said.

"Leave off," Ron repeated. "Stuff like this should only happen to Harry. I'll bet he's having a nice quiet summer."

"Ron, Ron . . ." Fred tsked, "Such uncharitable thoughts. You are acting as if pretty young women are just popping out of thin . . ."

*Pop!*

Suddenly, a pair of twin girls came into existence along with an excited looking house elf.

"Good call, brother mine," George commented.

"Wheezy twins. Dobby bring Carrie twins as Master Harry Potter sir asked. Dobby also bring letter and bag," the elf said holding out a letter.

"That utter coward," Hestia huffed as George accepted the letter from Dobby.

"This ought to be good," George said, opening the letter.

"Hello ladies," Fred said cheerfully, echoed by his brothers, though Ron was more than a little sullen as he did so.

"Who's a coward?" Ron asked.

"Harry," Flora said. "Afraid of a little female attention, he is."

"There's a story here," Fred commented.

"Hopefully, it is written on this parchment," George said before starting to read. "Dear Fred and George. I need your help looking after the twins for me. The other twins, Flora and Hestia. Their presence is making my wife unhappy and I haven't a clue what I'm doing. So, I'm hoping you won't mind helping out a bloke. When I send Dobby, I'll give him a bag of galleons to cover anything that's needed. If you need more just call him and I'll send more. Sorry to rush, but Dora just headed to the shower and was hinting that I should join her. Keep the twins happy and occupied. With Hermione coming back tomorrow, I don't think I'll have time for them or Luna. Have fun, as if I need to tell you that. Thanks, Harry Potter."

There were a few seconds silence before Fred said, "Well, that was insightful."

"Wife?" questioned George, looking at Hestia and Flora. "Shower?"

"That utter pillock," Ron said. "Here I go through the trouble of getting engaged to a pair of twins and he still managed to upstage me."

A very beautiful woman with short blonde hair entered a seedy hotel room carrying several shopping bags. She was dressed rather peculiarly. Her tee-shirt was beyond tight and did nothing to hide her ample bosom. In contrast, her shorts were several sizes too large, being held in place by some frayed string that looked as if it had had a kip in a dumpster. On her feet were a pair of cheap flip flops, looking as if they were an afterthought for her outfit.

After making sure the door was securely locked, she placed her bags on the bed and took a deep breath. Then with a leer, she poked her assets with a finger.

"Oooo," she cooed in pleasure with a lopsided grin, before shaking herself and finding her resolve.

She then lost her resolve. One shower and thirty minutes later, she reached into one of the bags and drew out a thermos. She opened the bottle and took a swig. There was a grimace on her face as she resealed the container. Then, in a raspy voice she called out, "Dobby!"

There was a pop and the small elf appeared in the room. "Who be calling Dobby? Dobby not recognize pretty lady."

"I'm disguised." The woman held up her thermos. "Polyjuice. Got it from an apothecary."

Dobby squinted at the woman, examining her. "Dobby know magic. Dobby has felt before. You is boy from Master Harry Potter sir's dorm."

The woman nodded. "I'm here in secret." She pulled a piece of paper out of the same bag where she had retrieved the thermos.

"There something you be wanting to tell Dobby?" the elf asked.

The woman sighed before defensively saying. "I plucked a hair off some random bloke's shirt. This is as much a surprise to me as it is for you."

Dobby sniffed the air. "Happy surprise if Dobby were to guess."

"Look, let's keep this mishap just between the two of us," the woman said. "I need you to get something for me." She handed the paper to Dobby. "I'm assuming Harry has bonded with you and you'd be willing to run this errand for me."

Delight sprouted on the elf's face. "Master Harry Potter sir has taken Dobby to be his elf. Dobby is very happy."

"Good," the woman said, "then I'm sure you'll be willing to help me protect Harry from a very bad person."

"Dobby be helping even if Dobby not be bonding with Master Harry Potter sir," the elf said firmly.

"The woman I have in mind, will hurt Harry badly and kill a lot of innocent people. We need to stop her and we need to be quiet about it."

"Dobby be listening."

"Can you get the supplies?" the woman asked.

The elf looked at the paper and then popped away. Less than a minute later, he popped back, appearing with a large box.

"Perfect," the woman said, reading the lettering on the side of the container. With steely eyes, she lifted the lid and glanced inside. After nodding to herself, she retrieved a cardboard cylinder from a shopping bag. She reached in the box and pulled out an object, which she quickly stuffed halfway into the cylinder. Then, holding her breath, she tugged at its ring. After satisfying herself that everything would remain stable, she stuffed the object the rest of the way in and sealed the end.

"This be helping Master Harry Potter sir?" Dobby asked.

The woman nodded. "Hopefully, this will be helping a lot of people. Now remember, you can't tell anyone about this . . . ever."

"Dobby be keeping secret."

The woman nodded before standing to leave the room. "I'll be right back. If you could return the box to where you found it, we're pretty much done here." She then made her way to Diagon Alley where she rented an owl to deliver her package. After that, she returned to her room to wait.

Sometime later, Dean Thomas left the hotel with a grin on his face.

Richard Understaff was a happy warden. Admittedly, this was a rare occurrence when he was at work, understandably so since he was the warden of Azkaban. Nevertheless, he was currently happy. His workload had been significantly decreased. Through no fault of his own, several of the prisoners were now on the deceased list. Roughly half of the afflicted did not survive the latest attack on those bearing the dark mark. It had been rather gruesome, but the deceased had been found, bled out from self-inflicted injuries. The remainder were in body binds, preventing any recurrences along those lines.

Richard felt no pity for them. He could well remember what they did to become residents under his care in the first place. It was only a shame that they managed to escape their just punishment in such a manner.

Oh, the paperwork was a pain, but there was no danger of an inquiry or even condemnation from the higher ups. Everyone was well aware of the ongoing attacks and the inability to do anything about them. There was no chance of him losing his job due to negligence.

But really, the paperwork was a pain.

Albus Dumbledore sighed in frustration. He hated to admit it, but his plans were no longer tenable. The Potter heir was no longer under his control and he himself was wanted for questioning regarding the mismanagement of the boy. It was a given that wherever the lad was, those around him were steadily poisoning his opinion of Albus. It would take something drastic to regain the weapon's trust, assuming that was still an option.

Albus had found out that the boy had been married off. When he tried to obtain the address of the bride, he had been informed that, chief warlock or not, he was barred from any information pertaining to any member of a family in an open blood feud with his own. He had wasted an hour trying to convince the records keeper otherwise. Even his wandless compulsions couldn't overcome the magical oaths the other wizard had taken in regard to confidentiality. Furthermore, legilimency could only have helped if the information was something the subject had actually known.

As things stood, when Tom came back, he would be unopposed. The carefully laid trap Albus had been preparing was no longer primed.

To make matters worse, when he had returned to his school, he found that the wards were barring his entrance. It had been an infuriating wait before Minerva had come to inform him that his tenure had been terminated. The ungrateful ingrates hadn't even allowed him to be present to defend himself and his position, not that he should have needed to do so. He had already arranged for the board to be lacking the numbers needed for a quorum and he trusted Amos to keep things in check. Somehow, that hadn't been enough.

Albus was no longer the headmaster. He now had no avenue to influence the boy. The boy who would surely be hostile towards him.

It was a disaster.

He had weathered disasters before.

He just needed a plan.

Harry Potter had not seen the last of Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore.

Dolores knew that she was holding onto her position by the skin of her teeth. With Cornelius imprisoned and awaiting trial, the only reason she held onto her power was because the temporary minister was a complete incompetent. That wouldn't have been the case had the Bones woman taken the reins. Luckily, since she had been the one to arrest the sitting minister, she had declined the office due to a conflict of interests. Likewise, Scrimgeour had to abstain for similar reasons. Fortunately, Crouch had been passed over due to the current accusations of his handling of Sirius Black's incarceration. Surprisingly, it had fallen on Bagman to hold the post until either Cornelius was cleared or a new minister elected, something that would happen at the next Wizengamot meeting.

Really? Bagman? Who in their right mind had thought that was a good idea? The fool could barely tie his own shoes. And everyone knew that he was basically a figurehead for the interim. This left Dolores herself temporarily wielding the power. She had used that power to make sure that the bribes Cornelius had taken couldn't be tied to her. It hadn't been difficult, since she had had the foresight to take her cut in cold hard galleons, forgoing a paper trail. It wasn't like Lucius had been paying her directly. Fudge had been the one rewarding her. He had bought her silence on more than one occasion.

Now, she was being forced to find a way to consolidate her power, a way to make herself indispensable to whomever sat in the big office come the end of the month. If that person were Amelia, she'd be lucky to head a department come next month.

To make matters worse, Dolores had to buttress her failing power base. Many of those she could count on to support her undertakings were now spending time at St. Mungo's, under the effects of the dreamless sleep potion. She needed to find a solution, and she needed to find one fast.

There was a knock on her office door, before the head Unspeakable strode in without waiting for an invitation.

"Croaker." Dolores said, falling back on her habit of using a sweet tone. "I was just about to summon you. Have you found a way to help the innocent victims of Sirius Black?"

Damn that hood; the reply lacked any emotion. "Yes, we have found a way to help the innocent victims."

Dolores sat up straighter in her chair. "It's about time. Quick now, tell me so I can get this implemented."

"It would be my pleasure."

"Now don't be a tease." Dolores was happy for the first time in days. "Details. Give me details."

"We have developed a potion," Croaker said.

"Good, good." Dolores beamed. "This potion, it will block the attacks?"

"Better," Croaker said. "When imbibed, it will allow the drinker to renounce their connection to He-who-shall-not-be-named, thus severing the link through which they are being attacked."

A frown crossed Dolores' face but was gone before anyone could be sure it was there. "I see. Wonderful news that. How soon until it is available?"

"It is available now," Croaker said. "Anyone who were compelled into the dark lord's service shall have their release. Admittedly a painful one, but release nonetheless."

"It can't be worse than what they have already suffered," Dolores said. "It sounds perfect."

Despite the hood, a hint of a smile could be heard. "I should inform you, anyone who willingly and knowingly entered into the bond shall die a horrible and painful death if they choose to take this course."

"I see." The smile Dolores gave the man was strained. "Well, that can't be helped. Can it?"

"I am happy to say that it cannot."

The frown reappeared. "Must you be so callous?"

"Yes."

"You would threaten the lives of our fine and upstanding citizens?" Dolores accused.

"If this potion kills them, they are by definition neither fine nor upstanding. They would, in fact, be traitors, criminals of the worst kind."

"You would pass judgment? That is the Wizengamot's job, not yours."

"I would offer reprieve to the innocent. It is not my job, as you say, to do so for the guilty. They may refuse the treatment and be it on their heads to do so."

Dolores considered his words for a moment. "You are dismissed," she said after a minute.

As the Unspeakable was leaving, Dolores spoke up one more time. "You will find another solution." She commanded.

"No," He didn't bother turning to address her. "I will not."

"I will have your job," Dolores promised.

"You may try," Croaker said, sparing no more time for the woman.

Dolores sat at her desk, staring into space for a good ten minutes. Mentally she cursed the man the entire time. Then, she started writing up the paperwork to sack Croaker, but gave it up as a bad job. Despite being a fool, Bagman was reading everything that he had to sign and he would have to countersign such a dismissal. The damn Unspeakable knew this, too. She was going to need leverage.

Knowing she'd not be able to get anything else accomplished, Dolores decided to call it a day. She was in check and she needed to consider her next move carefully.

She didn't bother letting her assistant know she was leaving; she just needed the solace of her home.

It wasn't long before she arrived at her place of residence. The pink interior did nothing to lighten her mood. She was too intent on analyzing her blackmail material to pay it much mind. With single minded determination, she raided her hiding place and retrieved all of her collected intel. Soon she was sitting at her desk with a large collection of scrolls and journals before her. There must be something she could use. There must be some way to salvage the situation. Croaker could not be unassailable.

She was thumbing through the first journal when an owl flew in through the charmed portal set up for their use. It landed on the desk on top of her treasures and hooted at her softly.

Sparing the bird a glance, Dolores saw that it had a large cardboard tube affixed to its leg. Absently, she waved her wand, freeing the package.

The owl gave another soft hoot and left the same way it had come.

Putting down the journal, Dolores cast a series of charms to check for curses and other magics. Satisfied, she picked up the delivery. It took her a minute to figure out how to open it and when she did, it seemed like the contents were stuck inside.

With a frown, she upended it and shook until something popped out. It landed on her parchmentwork with a thud and ping. Quickly, she picked it up, noting that a part of it, a metal handle, was now lying on the far corner of her desk.

She brought it close to her face for an inspection. "A metal egg?" was the thought that ran through her head.

A second later, a thought was not the next thing to go through her head.