Nick and Courtney struggled to lug their camcorders while belly-crawling through the school's ceiling. Courtney set Nick's flashlight down and raised a closed palm. He immediately came to a halt.

"I think we're close," Courtney said while letting go of her camcorder. "Give me the blueprints."

Nick yanked a folded up diagram from his waistband and passed it to Courtney. She shone the light on the plans and scrunched her face in thought. "Yep, this is it. This turn leads me through the ventilation shafts towards the lunch ladies' office. You keep following the ceiling tiles straight. That will bring you to the middle of the kitchen."

Nick nodded, unholstered a pen laser from his kit belt, and passed it to Courtney. "You can use that to cut into the ducts." He patted his diamond-tipped scissors. "I can use these to trim a hole in the fiberglass to film through." After Courtney nodded, Nick asked, "You remember the rules?"

"Duh. There were only three of them." Courtney ticked each one off on her left hand. "Make sure the lens caps are off, turn off our walkie-talkies, and if we get in trouble…"

Courtney's voice trailed off, so Nick finished her statement. "Then we split up, run away, and get help."

Both kids mulled that idea over. Courtney eventually grumbled, "I hate that last one."

"Me too," Nick assured her. "But we all agreed it's necessary." Nick stared past Courtney at the fork in the road. "I guess that's it, then. We have to split up."

Courtney handed back the flashlight and blueprints. Once Nick had tucked them away, she placed her hand palm-up between them. Nick didn't hesitate to lay his own atop it.

Courtney closed her eyes and smiled. "Out of every crazy thing that's happened today, that's happened this whole year? The most insane of them all is that I'm holding Nick Dean's hand." She opened her eyes and added, "And maybe also that neither of us has any hair. I really didn't see that coming."

"I never thought I'd shave my head for anything," Nick agreed. He smiled at Courtney and said, "It was a good trade, though."

Courtney squeezed his palm. "When this is done, you better meet me at the saloon for a drink."

Nick smiled and promised, "You have my word, m'lady."

Courtney grinned wider, pulled her hand away, and offered a thumbs up. Nick returned the gesture, then he watched her disappear around the corner. Once she was long gone, he crawled forwards until he was over the middle of the kitchen. He grabbed his scissors, silently cut a hole in the tile just large enough to film through, and unscrewed his lens cap. He angled the camera through the opening and hit Record just as Ike and Meagan walked in.

Ike and Megan strode into the kitchen, flanked on either side by two joyless lunch ladies. They halted just past the door and stared at the line of ten women sporting identical blue dresses and white aprons. Their tall and heavyset leader took a step forward.

The woman's hair was graying and wrapped in a bun. Her apron was stained and her muscles bulged from years of hard labor. She stared the two children down, then managed a slim smile. "So, the great Meagan Miller and her sidekick have arrived."

Ike was grateful that his aviators hid his narrowing eyes. Meagan simply nodded and said, "Thank you for having us."

"Thank you for coming here," the lunch lady said. "I am Hazel, and I speak for all my kind. We have much to discuss, so let us begin."

An elderly woman with a crooked back emerged from the shelving units. With a stock pot in one hand and a ladle in the other, she began a rhythmic drumming. In a thick Cockney accent, she shouted, "Commence the Cleansing Ceremony!"

Ike immediately fell to one knee and stared at the floor. Meagan raised her hands above her head and looked up at the heavens. A lunch lady stepped out of the line and approached the prep table. She grabbed a gallon of holy vegetable oil, twisted open its cap, and filled a ladle to the brim. She flicked the dipper's contents onto Meagan's face and proclaimed, "Let the mother's tears wash away any trace of the patriarchy's contamination."

After Meagan was splattered, the lunch lady set the ladle down and grabbed the rest of the oil. She strode towards Ike and upended its entire contents over his head. "And let this blessed rain wash away all of your sins."

Once the jug was empty, another lunch lady faced Hazel and fell to one knee. She opened an ornate wooden chest which held a large navy blue towel and tiny cerulean face cloth. Hazel grabbed both and strode towards the children. She offered Meagan the towel and said, "Your impurities have been vanquished. You are now ready for the Sacred Towel of Drying."

As Meagan mopped the oil from her face, Hazel glowered at Ike. "Your corruption is diluted, so you may take the Hallowed Face Cloth That Is Also For Drying."

Ike glared for a long moment before accepting the relic.

Hazel motioned towards a round table in the middle of the room. "The holy feast is prepared. You may join us."

Meagan took her seat as Ike struggled to keep from sliding everywhere. After several awkward seconds he joined his friend and stared at the smorgasbord. Three cartons of chocolate milk and the lunch ladies' most revered dishes were set before him. Unseasoned peas and carrots, square pieces of cardboard-esque pizza, and undressed burgers graced with cold slices of cheese lay in wait.

Ike allowed the ladies to grab their portions, then scooped the leftovers onto his own plate.

The ancient woman banged her stock pot and bellowed, "Begin the Feast of Fortitude!"

Hazel raised her milk. "To the sisters who prepared this meal."

Meagan lifted her drink and spoke the line that Courtney had prepared for her. "To the mothers who built this school."

Ike hoisted his carton and flawlessly recited, "To the grandmothers who devised the recipes."

In perfect synchrony, three straws were gripped, opened, and shoved into place.

While Meagan and the leader sucked until they were blue in the face, Ike folded his hands and incanted the Prayer of Patience. When the girls' milks were empty, Ike took his own small sip. The lead lunch lady nodded in approval and stared at the children. "The gods are appeased. We may now talk." As Meagan chomped on her cheeseburger, Hazel said, "We lunch ladies hear each word that is spoken in our cafeteria. We know all that transpires in this school. Yet, you have shocked us.

"Deep Dish is beyond popular and both of you excelled in cooking class. Your stew shall surely sell easily. Why give it to us?"

Meagan set her burger down and took an enormous bite of pizza. "Ike and a had a lot of fun making the stew. But now that it's time to actually sell it, we realized we may have bitten off more than we can chew."

As a glob of pizza went down the wrong pipe and sent Meagan coughing, Ike slid her his chocolate milk and leaned forward. "We've got a saloon to run, classes to pass, and a half dozen other schemes going on. We don't have time to make and sell stew to every kid in school."

Meagan sucked on the milk, swallowed hard, and nodded. "And there's one other reason we're giving it up."

Hazel arched an eyebrow. "And what, pray tell, is that?"

Meagan narrowed her eyes and answered, "The Hungbringer." As Hazel straightened her back, Meagan explained, "They're stealing kids' lunches. Plus I heard that they sabotaged Chez Chic. It doesn't seem like a good time to start selling food."

Ike added, "It's a time to make powerful allies."

Meagan leaned back and smiled. "If there's a war coming, we want to be on the winning side."

Hazel steepled her hands and contemplated the children's words. "Powerful allies," she repeated. She drummed her fingers together and cocked her head at Meagan. "You have a show that reaches every student's ears. That could indeed be…useful."

Hazel swiveled her gaze towards Ike. "And I have heard tales of your legend, Ike Burke. You are the founder of the Dark Brotherhood, one of the school's fiercest fighters, and a tenacious force that never surrenders. We have recently come in need of such a warrior."

Meagan asked. "So what do you say? We'll sell you the stew. And if there's anything else we can do to help you, just say the word. You're all strong, but we could make you stronger."

Hazel was silent for a long moment. "We do indeed hold much power. But, I wonder, do you truly understand what gives us our might?"

Meagan shifted in her seat at this deviation from Courtney's script. She glanced at Ike, who offered the slightest of shrugs. Meagan offered, "I mean, every kid's gotta eat and you control the food."

Hazel stayed silent, so Ike added, "You're an unbreakable group. You strengthen each other."

Hazel offered a half smile and rose from her chair. Hands clasped behind her back, she began to pace. "You are both right, but there is so much more. Tell me, how long do you think civilization would last if children went hungry? If they were too weak and miserable to pay attention in school? If they didn't pick up the mantle when the prior generations passed? Everything humanity has achieved would crumble to dust without the lunch ladies. We are the tillers of the soil, the tenders of the crop, the guardians of the future."

"Cool," Meagan offered.

Hazel narrowed her eyes. "We give all that we have to this school. And we ask for nothing in return save for respect. So, can you guess what we lunch ladies despise more than anything else? More than students with absurd allergies? More than free lunch programs? More than thin-skinned children who complain about sour milk despite the fact that it lasts a week beyond an arbitrarily picked expiration date?"

While Ike peered at the stamp on his drink, Meagan offered, "Sack lunches?"

"No. As ungracious as those are, there is one thing that we detest more. And that is...food fights." Ike cocked his head in confusion as Meagan's face slowly fell. "They are the antithesis of all we stand for. They waste resources, turn lunch from a rejuvenating lull into a violent battle, and make a mockery of our sacred work."

Ike splayed his hands and said, "I don't understand. What does that have to do with us?"

Meagan gulped as Hazel glowered at her. "So, you didn't tell him?"

Ike asked Meagan, "Tell me what?"

Hazel growled, "When the Black Atom struck, we did all we could to comfort you children. When your own kind stole our Jell-o, you blamed us for a lack of dessert. You cried for sweets, and out of the goodness of her heart my mother obliged." Hazel motioned at the bow-backed woman beside her. "She offered you our most divine gift. She made you food from scratch. And how did you repay this kindness? You desecrated this holy place with the Great Food Fight of Two Weeks Ago!"

Meagan wrung her hands and said, "Uh, it was really all Sheen's idea. I just got caught up in the ruckus."

Hazel slammed her hands on the table and leaned forward. She rested her eyes an inch from Meagan's and snarled, "You told everyone to murder us all."

With a nervous laugh, Meagan protested, "It was just a figure of speech."

Hazel dug her nails into the table. "You foolish child. You thought we would forget, but we never do. We know what you did. We know that you have no interest in selling your stew. We know that you are after the Hungbringer."

As Ike leapt from his chair and balled his hands into fists, Hazel straightened her back. With a grin, she admitted. "And we know that you are not alone."

Nick watched in horror as ten lunch ladies pounced on his friends. A feral scream rang out from across the kitchen. Courtney's faint voice cried, "Nick, they're in the vents!"

Nick gulped, turned around, and flicked on his flashlight.

A pair of gleaming eyes stared back.

A lunch lady silently crawled towards him, teeth bared in fury. As she placed her full weight on the ceiling tile next to his, Nick slammed his camera down as hard as he could. The fiberglass and lady atop it went tumbling to the floor. As the woman screamed in terror, Nick yanked out his motion detector.

He thumbed it to life, and a half dozen dots blinked towards him.

Nick ejected his camera's tape, slid the cassette in one of his trench coat's pockets, and dove towards the ground. He bent his right arm and landed an elbow drop in the center of the fallen lunch lady's back. She roared in agony as Nick leapt to his feet.

Ike and Meagan had their arms pinned behind them and stared at him in terror.

Courtney was restrained and being marched towards their friends. She paid them no mind; her face was wrinkled in deep thought as she brainstormed a way out of their mess.

Nick turned towards the only exit, where four lunch ladies blocked the door.

Nick grit his teeth and whipped out his Hypno-beam. He shot each woman and screamed, "Fight the other-"

Nick gurgled as Hazel's muscular hand grasped his throat. She squeezed and hoisted him into the air.

"You have come so far," Hazel bristled as her mother banged her pot against each hypnotized woman's ears. As they stirred back to consciousness, Nick fruitlessly pounded on Hazel's wrist.

The lunch lady tore the Hypno-beam from his grasp, studied the weapon, and shoved Nick against a wall.

"Yet your journey ends here."

As Nick's oxygen dwindled and he desperately clawed at her vice-like grip, Hazel shot his three friends. They fell into a stupor as Nick's vision went dark. The last thing he saw was the weapon swinging his way as Hazel promised, "You will never be whole again."

"Nick, are you really going to leave me hanging?"

Nick's eyes shot open and his whole body shook in terror. He frantically looked around for the lunch ladies and his friends. There was no one there but Cindy. They sat in her office, and she held a raised glass of cranberry juice towards him.

Cindy asked, "What's wrong?"

"Where are they?" Nick panted while dropping his glass of Mott's and leaping to his feet. He glanced in every direction and asked, "Where did everyone go?"

Cindy set her drink down and said, "Nick, calm down. Jimmy said this might happen." She got up and grabbed his trembling wrist. "You were hypnotized. Your memory might be weird for a couple days. But it won't be permanent."

The hammering of Nick's heart slowed at Cindy's calming touch. He examined the office once more, then stared into her kind green eyes.

Back in Ms. Fowl's classroom, he and Cindy locked gazes for the first time. She basked in adoration and he finally realized how pretty her smile was. He handed her back her pen and asked, "Did you drop this?"

Nick clutched his head and shook the powerful memory away. "I don't understand. The lunch ladies had us, and then…" his voice trailed off as he couldn't remember anything except waking up in this room. "What happened?"

Cindy squeezed his wrist and smiled; grateful devotion radiated off of her. "They tried to hypnotize you. But you fought it off. You told me that they wanted you to team up with them. To do their bidding and steal more lunches. But you managed to resist. All because you didn't want to let me down."

Nick blinked in confusion as Cindy led him back to his chair. "I did?"

Cindy nodded and gently lowered him into his seat. She pulled her own chair beside him and sat so close they nearly touched. "You said that when you thought of me, you realized you could never hurt me. And that broke the spell."

Nick's blood chilled as Cindy's mesmerizing gaze drew him in.

There they stood amidst three corpses, where he first said the words that would always bond them together. "You know I'll follow you anywhere, right?"

Cindy's face fell as she studied his black eye. "I didn't mean for you to get hurt. Stopping the Hungbringer wasn't worth that. But even after what they did to you…you kept going. For me."

Cindy held out her palm. It trembled, then she placed her hand atop his. Nick stared in disbelief, then met her anxious gaze.

"I haven't had a crush on many girls. But the ones I have liked…I could actually feel it."

Nick's stomach twisted. "Cindy…"

"You told me once that Jimmy and I were great together. That I shouldn't throw it away unless I was sure that's what I wanted. I care about him…I always will after everything we've been through. But it hasn't been the same since that day at his lab."

Nick closed his eyes and clenched his jaw as he imagined Jimmy tossing his girlfriend into the mud and rain.

Cindy rubbed her thumb against his hand as she admitted, "He hurt me more than anyone ever has. But you?" She leaned her head towards his and whispered, "You fight for me every chance you get."

"Why did you do so much for me? You could have died for nothing."

"You're not nothing."

Cindy rested her forehead against Nick's and admitted, "I made a mistake letting you go. Please tell me it's not too late to make up for it."

Nick savored the feeling of her their lips nearly brushing together. After a few seconds, he found the strength to turn away. "Cindy...I can't."

Cindy's face fell. "Why? Jimmy will get over it; he has to."

"It's not that. It's Courtney."

Cindy cocked her head. "Courtney Tyler?" When Nick nodded, Cindy asked, "What does she have to do with this?"

Nick admitted, "We partnered up. She saved me. And...uh...something happened between us."

Cindy took a moment to absorb that, then narrowed her eyes. "That sounds awfully familiar."

Nick stared at the floor as Cindy dug her nails into her palm. "You only worked with her because you couldn't partner with me. She's just a silver medal, Nick."

Nick shook his head. "Don't say that. She's-"

"A nerd," Cindy snarled. "A freak who pretends she's a reporter, whose glasses are thicker than the dumb books she's always reading, who you only gave the time of day because you needed help getting over me!"

"None of that is true."

"Isn't it? Didn't you think all those things? Didn't you look at her and think she's nowhere near as beautiful as me?"

Nick stared into her manic eyes. Did they always have flecks of black?

He watched Cindy across the dance floor and stared in awe. There she was, somehow even more beautiful than in Canterbury.

Cindy stepped towards Nick and drilled her gaze deep into his. The ebony pinpoints swirled into wild spirals.

"Be honest, Nick. You thought she was ugly."

Courtney pulled away her beret, revealing a scalp covered in blood.

"You always wished it were me."

"I'd follow you anywhere."

"Tell me the truth."

I'd follow you anywhere.

"After everything we've been through, don't lie to me."

I'd follow you anywhere.

Her eyes spun, black overtaking the emerald and usurping everything around him.

You will never be whole again.

"If you ever cared about me at all, say what you thought."

The world evaporated and darkness replaced all that he had ever known. All that existed was the endless void, the chilling cold, and the deafening six words that must be obeyed.

"Break each other with the truth."

In his single second of clarity, Nick glanced around him. To his left were Ike and Meagan, to his right was Courtney. They were restrained in a line; each had their arms pinned behind their back by a brutish lunch lady. Hazel stood before all of them, grinning in anticipation. As he stared into Courtney's eyes, his body was stolen.

Nick's heart hammered in an irregular beat. His teeth chattered, his limbs shook, his neck twitched. His lips moved and alien words poured out.

"Yo..yo…you…"

Nick clenched his jaw; his teeth threatened to splinter. He groaned in agony as his mouth moved without his permission.

"You…are…silver and Cindy's gold," he spat. He panted for breath, thrashed his head, but the words kept tumbling free.

"I wanted her, not you." He gasped and watched Courtney's face shatter. "You're nothing you're nothing you're nothing! You're one day she's four months. I never thought of you before I never noticed you because you're a nerd you're a ghost you're a freak that's why I never saw you that's why no one sees you!"

Nick bit his tongue hard enough to bleed, but the words still came.

"You look disgusting. Your hair is gross I hate it! She's beautiful and you're ugly!"

Courtney's lips quivered as her eyes glistened. She slammed her lids closed against the coming tears, then her whole body shook.

"Yo..yo...you," her eyes widened in horror as the truth spilled out. "You're stupid you're worthless! I'm smart. I'm bet...bet...better than you. You're the loser you're the freak!" Courtney shook her head, groaned in frustration, and then screamed, "You're just a sheep! I don't need anyone but you need everyone! Without Jimmy or Cindy or me telling you what to do you're lost you're a loser you're pathetic. You're a sad lonely puppet. All you have is nice hair which is gone and now you're nothing and that's all you'll ever be!"

Courtney blinked, stared away in disgust, then scrunched her face in thought.

Ike clenched his hands into fists tight enough to draw blood from his palm. He trained his aviators on Meagan, groaned, and snapped, "You're a crazy idiot! I'm intense but I'm functional and you're just a lunatic! No one likes you because you're too much so how could I? Why would I be the only one who doesn't get tired of you? I'll hate you too just like they all do I can't be your friend!"

Meagan's face fell, she choked back tears, and then her body began to shake. She screamed, "You think I'm crazy look at you! You make Nerf Wars you make a saloon you are nuts and you want to judge me?" Meagan's neck spasmed and every vein threatened to burst. She looked up at the ceiling and snarled, "I hate your stupid sunglasses! They're not cool they're useless and dumb how do you even see? They make you look like an idiot I hate them!"

As Meagan panted, all four kids stared at each other in horror.

Hazel grinned and said, "And so it all comes out. Do you really think your pathetic group that detests each other can stand against us?" Hazel motioned at her sisters in arms. She turned to Courtney and mocked, "Why would you fight for a boy who thinks you're an ugly freak?"

"That's not true," Nick begged Courtney to believe him.

Hazel repeated her command. "Break each other with the truth. All that you said is what you honestly feel."

Courtney finally met the lunch lady's gaze. "I did think that Nick was dumb, that I was better than him, and that he was a loser."

Nick slumped in defeat as he stared at Courtney in disbelief.

Courtney narrowed her eyes and leaned towards Hazel. "I told myself those things when I tried to stop crushing on him. But they're not how I really feel. And I'm guessing the same goes for what he just said to me." She turned to her friends and said, "Everything we just heard was intrusive thoughts, things that popped in our heads before we really knew each other." She met Nick's gaze and managed a smile. "But I know you now, and you're the best person I've ever met. Nothing can make me forget that."

Hazel snarled, "He thinks you look disgusting! He thought that today."

"Duh," Courtney rolled her eyes. "My head is shredded; obviously I looked better with hair. I thought I was hideous when I first saw my reflection. How could Nick not think the same for a split second? But all that matters is when I felt like the ugliest girl in the world, Nick still made me feel pretty."

Nick smiled at Courtney and admitted, "I used to think nerds and geeks were losers. All I cared about was being cool, but what did that get me? I didn't feel alive until I shared a malt with the biggest nerd in school. Now I know that people like you are the coolest kids of all.

"And yeah, when we first teamed up I wished I was partnered with Cindy. Until I got to know you. Now there's no one I'd rather have by my side."

Meagan shouted, "I'm on your other side, jackass! But my bestie's right. Obviously I'm freaking nuts; that's my whole thing! How could Ike not wonder if he could like me? But he had a chance to change me today and didn't even consider it. And he could have walked away any time over the past two weeks. But he never did, so that means he's really my friend."

The group smiled at Ike. He glared back. "So do all of you hate my sunglasses? Or just Meagan?"

"Oh come on," Meagan groaned.

Courtney said, "They just make it seem like you're trying too hard to be cool. You don't need them, you're awesome!"

Nick nodded and added, "Plus we get in a lot of fights inside this building, dude. Shades are not a great tactical choice. How do you see through them?"

"If I couldn't see how did I beat you in every foam war?" Ike bristled. He sucked in a deep breath and growled, "Ugh, forget it. We're still friends. I guess."

Courtney stared at Nick and quickly winked. Nick cocked his head as she swiveled her gaze towards Hazel. "You see? You thought you'd get us all fired up."

Nick arched a confused eyebrow. Courtney slightly wiggled her hips and said, "You thought we'd get heated."

Nick stared at his own waist and the kit belt adorning it. The belt with one working thruster. Nick looked at the activation button on his right hip. He gently tugged his arms, but the lunch lady's grip was firm. When he and Courtney glanced at each other, he quickly mouthed, No hands.

Courtney smiled wider. She glared at Hazel and said, "You thought we'd kick each other when we were down."

Nick glanced at Courtney's legs; she slammed her left foot to the ground and moved it side to side.

Nick planted his feet deeper into the floor, angled himself towards Courtney, and waited for the perfect moment.

Courtney ever so slightly tilted herself towards Nick and said, "But you can't tear us apart. We're unbreakable."

Hazel walked towards Courtney and growled, "Then let's just try this again until-"

As soon as she stepped in front of him, Nick roared, "Now!" He kicked off the ground and launched towards Courtney. His captor yanked him back, but he managed to move a few inches. Courtney kicked at his hip, barely managed to hit the jetpack's power button, and Nick's one thruster flared to life.

"AAAGGH!" the lady behind Nick released him as the fire singed her clothes and scorched her skin. Nick rocketed straight into Hazel and sent them crashing to the ground.

Nick slammed his fist against the red button, scooped up the fallen Hypno-beam, and took in the scene.

Four lunch ladies still blocked the only exit.

Hazel groaned while clambering to her feet.

A half dozen brutes clenched their fists and stormed towards him.

Three others restrained his friends, who all desperately shouted the same thing.

"Nick, RUN!"

Nick shot the nearest lunch lady in the face with the Hypno-beam, activated his jetpack, and spiraled straight through the ceiling.

"Fight the other lunch ladies!" Courtney, Ike, and Meagan screamed as Nick ploughed through fiberglass and crashed into the beams above him. He deactivated the thruster, collapsed onto a ceiling tile, and crawled forward as fast as he could. He ignored the sounds of chaos below him while retracing the path he had taken with Courtney.

"Right…right…left," he whispered while taking the necessary turns. Once he was out of the cafeteria, he slammed his fists hard on the next tile and knocked it to the floor.

He lowered himself over the edge, dropped down, and crumbled to a heap next to the school store.

"Whoa," Brittany reeled back in shock. "Where the heck did you come from?"

Nick ignored the question as the cafeteria doors burst open. Two bloodied lunch ladies sprinted over the threshold and stormed him.

"Grab him!" the closest woman screamed.

Nick leapt to his feet and dashed down the hallways. Gotta get to Clarke, he told himself while craning his head over his shoulder. The gap between him and his assailants had been halved; he wasn't going to make it.

Nick stared at the wall to his right, grit his teeth, and whispered, "Godwin."

As the lunch ladies came within three feet of him, he leaped to his right. At the perfect moment he kicked off the wall, careened towards the lunch ladies dashing past him, and wrapped his arms around the nearest one's neck.

He used his momentum to spin around the brute. Halfway through his revolution, he slammed his right foot out and smashed it into the other woman's nose.

Red spackled the halls as the woman crumpled to the floor. Nick finished his arc and landed on his spinning pole's back. He kicked off of her and slid across the floor while she flew face-first onto the ground.

Nick jumped up and whipped out his Hypno-beam. A shot to the lunch lady's face sent her into a trance. Nick ordered, "Save the kids in the cafeteria!"

As the brute limped back towards the kitchen, Nick pocketed his weapon and patted his trench coat's pocket. The tape was still intact.

"No time to waste," he resumed sprinting down the hall. He'd just passed the library when a painted boy leapt off each bank of lockers lining the side wall.

Nick's eyes widened in shock as the two Dark Brothers tried to tackle him to the floor. He dodged one, but the other shoved him hard against steel. The assassins clenched their fists and approached him.

"They said that you…"

"Beat us. Made us…"

"Forget. You will not…"

"Win again," the closest assassin growled while tossing a jab at Nick's throat.

Nick juked away as the other's fist slammed into his blackened eye.

Stars burst to life amidst a white void. He collapsed to the ground as a powerful kick to his waist made his lungs explode.

"You'll die here. Like…"

"You should have before."

Ivory faded to reveal Cindy shielding him from a stampede.

There was Courtney, so eager to set Chez Chic ablaze to save him.

Ike stood behind him, gripping his shoulder and saving his life.

Meagan yanked on his arm, begging him to dance.

Nick narrowed his eyes as Courtney's words echoed in his skull.

We're unbreakable.

Nick screamed and launched himself into a kip-up. A fist flew at his face; he grabbed the clenched hand and twisted as hard as he could.

"Agghh!" the Dark Brother screamed as his wrist was sprained.

The other assassin launched a haymaker at Nick's temple. He ducked beneath the blow, kicked the boy's knee with every ounce of his strength, and felt his patella splinter. As the groaning child fell to one knee, Nick turned back to the boy whose wrist he grasped. He punched straight down onto the assassin's twisted elbow and felt muscles rip free from ligaments.

Nick let go of the child and punched him hard enough in the mouth to send a baby tooth flying.

Nick spun on the crippled boy, smacked his elbow across the demon's nose, and kept limping down the corridor.

"Clarke…get to Clarke," Nick gasped while clutching his throbbing ribs.

He made it to the foyer just as the sound of screeching tires filled the halls. He glanced over his shoulder and stared in disbelief as a cardboard truck banked hard around the corner.

"NICO!" Tony screamed through the driver side window while trying to run Nick down.

Nick hobbled towards the office, realized he couldn't outrun the truck, and dove to the side. Tony swerved the vehicle and slammed its cargo bay hard into Nick.

Nick careened onto the floor as the truck tipped over. Nick groaned in agony as Tony tore his way out of the cabin just before it burst into flames.

"I have student loans because of you!" Tony screamed while pouncing on Nick.

One hand wrapped around Nick's throat as the other slammed a powerful punch straight at his nose. Nick raised his left arm to block the blow; the impact still sent his limb bouncing hard off his face.

Nick punched Tony hard in the kidney. As he collapsed, Nick shoved him onto the floor. "That is not my fault!" Nick and Tony clambered to their feet, balled their hands into fists, and cast confused glances at the burning truck.

Nick moaned, "Oh no."

WEEWAHWEEWAHWEEWAH!

Klaxons roared and sprinklers flooded the hallway as the fire alarm blared to life.

Tony charged towards Nick. "I'll kill whoa!" Tony cried out as he slipped and landed hard on his tailbone.

"Just stay down, Tony," Nick moaned while limping across the foyer. Nick was in sight of the office when the building's main doors burst open. A 12 volt fire truck careened inside at an excess of two miles an hour. Two sixth-graders clad in firefighter's uniforms barreled towards Nick.

"GET OUT OF THE WAY!" one firefighter warned as his partner aimed the water hose at the flaming vehicle down the hall.

Nick easily sidestepped the fire truck as it inched past him.

A camouflaged Dark Brother burst off of the passing vehicle's side and tackled him to the floor.

"I will shatter-"

Nick punched the assassin in the throat, grabbed the side of his face, and slammed it as hard as he could into the floor.

"Almost there," Nick spat a bloody glob and shambled across the flooding floor towards the office. He was a dozen feet away when a ceiling tile and lunch lady collapsed to the ground.

Hazel groaned while pushing herself to her feet. "You shall go no further."

Nick swallowed hard, clenched his fists, and shouted, "CLARKE!"

Hazel roared and charged.

Nick tried to sidestep her, but his ribs flared in protest. She ploughed into him, wrapped him in a bear hug, and slammed him against the wall. As she wrapped one hand around his throat, she tore the Hypno-beam from his pocket.

"This ends now," she snarled while aiming it at Nick's face.

Nick closed his eyes as a familiar voice boomed, "Yes, it does."

Nick opened one eye to find Hazel straightening her back and lowering the Hypno-beam. Nick angled his head and spotted his principal striding towards them. Her white leather Louboutins clacked along the floor as she warned, "Hazel, there better be a damn good reason for you touching that boy."

Hazel stared at the Hypno-beam in her grasp, dropped Nick to the ground, and faced the principal. "He had this, ma'am. He used it to cause all this chaos," she motioned at the insanity around them.

Principal Clarke looked to her left, at the Retroville Middle School Firefighter Live Action Role Players extinguishing a flaming cardboard vehicle.

She turned to her right through the open front doors, where she spotted Assistant Principal Gonzalez rappelling down the side of the school with a half dozen children strapped to her back.

Then she stared hard at the bruised and bloodied lunch lady before her. Hazel said, "He broke into the kitchen. He-"

Nick desperately shouted, "She's lying! I have proof!"

Clarke flashed him a palm and said, "Her first."

Nick gulped as Hazel smiled. "He's been stealing lunches all week, ma'am. President Vortex asked him to find the thief; she didn't know it was him. So he tried to frame us. He broke into the kitchen, hypnotized us, and made us act like we were the Hungbringer. Then he filmed it!"

Nick's face fell in horror as he glanced at the tape in his pocket.

Hazel went on, "He was trying to bring you the tape so we'd get blamed and fired. But we were hypnotized, ma'am. He's the one behind all of this!"

Principal Clarke considered this for a long moment. She turned to Nick and said, "Come here."

"Principal Clarke…"

"Get over here. Now." Nick trudged towards her. He didn't say a word as she studied his face. "You're hurt."

Hazel said, "I was trying to beat him here to warn you about the tape. When I got ahead of him he attacked me. I had to-"

"His turn," Clarke raised a palm.

Hazel fell quiet as the principal studied Nick. "Nicholas Dean. You're H.A.L.L.P.A.S.S. You're James's friend. You're Cynthia's…she once told me that she trusted you more than anyone."

Nick stared up at her in surprise.

"So is it true that you somehow hypnotized every lunch lady in that kitchen before any of them could stop you?"

Hazel desperately said, "That's what happened. Why ask him anything? He's just going to lie."

Clarke glowered at Hazel and snarled, "His. Turn."

Nick swallowed hard and said, "They've been stealing the lunches, ma'am. They sabotaged Chez Chic. They hired the Dark Brotherhood to fight me and my partner. They got a Hypno-beam and used it on us. I'm sorry for everything bad that's happened today. But every bad choice I made was to stop them. They are dangerous and you have to fire them. Please," Nick's voice quivered as he begged, "believe me."

Clarke said, "Nicholas, give me the tape."

Nick swallowed hard, grit his teeth, and handed Clarke his evidence.

Clarke asked, "I let you kids do just about anything here. That's because in the real world," she motioned outside, "you're not going to have parents or teachers or me to help you. You'll be on your own, except for the friends you make along the way. So even if it means a few less classes, I want you all to be prepared. I give you a lot of freedom, but with that comes responsibility. To be a good person, to help each other, and to tell me the truth. So I will ask you this once, and I expect an honest answer.

"Were the lunch ladies hypnotized when you filmed this?"

Nick stared Clarke hard in the eyes. "No, ma'am."

"And you're certain that the lunch ladies did everything you're accusing them of?"

"Yes, I swear on my life, on Cindy's life, on the lives of all my friends."

Clarke studied the tape, nodded to herself, and turned to Hazel. "Hazel, go home. You're on unpaid leave until I review this and file a report to the superintendent."

Hazel's jaw dropped. "But…but…you haven't even seen any evidence!"

"I walked in on you holding a bruised child by the throat. That's enough for now."

"No," Hazel stormed towards the principal and glowered at her. Clarke stood motionless as Hazel towered over her. "Do you have any idea who you're up against? The power our union has? The friends I have on the school board? I am a lunch lady. We are the source of all this school's power and I shall use every ounce of it to smite you if you cast me aside!"

Once the lunch lady fell quiet, Clarke sucked in a calming breath. "You are an idiot."

Hazel cocked her head and asked, "What?"

"I said, you are an idiot. Somehow, amidst all the insanity in this place, I have the most trouble understanding how you can be this stupid."

"You listen to me-"

"No!" Clarke roared with enough fury to shut Hazel up. "The adults are talking now. And somehow this child," she motioned at Nick, "has a better claim to that title than you. You reheat food and slap it on a plate. You are not a hero, you are not higher ranked than a principal, and you are not the guardian of civilization. Honestly, what is wrong with you?"

Hazel shifted her feet and said, "I-"

"Just shut up," Clarke warned. "I let you and your absurd colleagues keep your bizarre paganistic matriarchal cult because I'm new here and didn't want to ruffle any feathers. Clearly, that was the dumbest decision I ever made. What was wrong with Principal Forrester that he let you act this way for years?"

A seventh-grade boy clad in a white coat walked through the school's entrance and waved. "Hello, I'm Evan White. One of the Retroville Middle School Psychiatrist Live Action Role Players. I can answer that for you. He was deeply mentally ill, ma'am."

Clarke blinked and stared at the child in confusion.

Evan raised his index and middle finger, flashed a salute, and retreated outside.

Clarke let out a trembling sigh and warned Hazel, "Leave this building before I call the police." Hazel hesitated, so Clarke shouted, "NOW!"

Hazel slouched to half her height and trudged her way outside.

Nick watched in amazement as the lunch lady disappeared. He turned to his exhausted principal and said, "Thank you, ma'am. But my friends are still trapped with the other lunch ladies in the cafeteria. I was able to send some help their way, but they're still in danger."

"For goodness' sakes," Principal Clarke mumbled while heading back towards her office. She motioned for Nick to follow. Once they were both inside, she grabbed the microphone on her desk and activated the P.A. system. "Attention all cafeteria workers. Seeing as how all lunches are finished, every lunch lady is to immediately take the rest of the day off. I am giving you all a direct order to vacate the premises. I'm heading to the cafeteria now. If I find any lunch ladies there, or any children in less than pristine condition, then you're all fired."

Nick collapsed in one of the chairs facing Clarke's desk. He sighed in relief and said, "I finally get why Cindy loves you so much."

Clarke managed a brief grin, though her face fell as she said, "I'll review your tape, Nicholas. But I'll need at least a rough report from you by the end of the day. If what you said is true, if all the lunch ladies were really stealing food and hurting children, we're going to have to clean house. That means I need evidence…and to find a whole new crew to staff the kitchen."

Nick pondered that as Clarke headed towards the door. "I'm going to the cafeteria. Take all the time here you need, then go see the nurse."

Clarke was just leaving the room when Nick asked, "Ma'am?"

"Yes?"

Nick smiled and said, "I think I know a few people who might be thrilled to work the lunch shift."