Chapter Five: Friends vs Snake Mastermind

The Doge exploded. A girl burst out of it. She cackled.

"I am Kayla the Best!" She declared. "And I am the mastermind behind this game!"

"We figured out who you were!" Scott yelled. "So we win!"

"Ah, not quite. See, you still have to play by the rules." Kayla pulled a rule book out of her coat pocket, flipping through it. "The only way to escape is to kill someone, right?"

Pelican glared at her. "If you're insinuating we kill you, well, I'd have no problem with that." She twirled her purple hammer.

Kayla smirked. "It also says if the students figure out who the killer is, the killer dies."

"So we have to set up an unsolvable case?" Michael asked.

"Nah. I'll let you kill two birds with one stone— if one of you will sacrifice yourself and die with me for the whole group, I'll let you all go."

Scott turned back to his classmates— no, his friends. He couldn't let any of them die. Not when he'd been so terrible to so many of them…

Scott turned back to Kayla, taking in a deep breath.

"I'll do it."

Scott looked at Kyle, shocked by his volunteering.

Kyle's raised hand quivered. "I'll sacrifice myself for the group."

"No!" Scott yelled. "I'll do it!"

Kayla shrugged. "I'll kill you both if you want."

"Let me do it!" Lace demanded.

"No, me!" Nosepickerfart whined.

Alexx sighed dramatically. "I suppose I shall also volunteer my pure, white-as-snow soul to be destroyed for the sake of my comrades." He snickered. "Even though they totally don't deserve it."

Pelican, Brubles, and Michael shared a glance. None of them were going to volunteer.

Kayla grinned wickedly. "I suppose you'll have to choose your sacrificial lamb."

Scott spun on his heel to face the group. "It should be me, guys. To atone for all my sins. Let me use my ultimate and take out this snake at once!"

Kyle looked at them pleadingly. "Please! I want to be helpful!"

Pelican rolled her eyes and beckoned them all closer. Once everybody was huddled, she whispered, "We can all just rush her, idiots. If she's dead, she can't execute us for murder."

"Ohhhh," Kyle said. "Yeah that's a way better plan."

Scott nodded, somewhat embarrassed he hadn't thought of that. "Everybody got their trusty purple hammers?"

"Got mine!" Nosepickerfart raised it.

Brubles took off her top hat and shook out a purple hammer. "Got mine."

Pelican twirled hers.

Michael gestured to his, which was leaning against his stand.

Lace pulled hers from behind her back. It had little bite marks on it. Perhaps she'd run out of nails to bite and turned to the hammer in anxiety. But hey, that's just Scott being a people reader .

Alexx pulled his from his pocket.

Kyle raised his a little. "Got mine."

Scott took his out of the inside of his jacket, brandishing it with a flourish. "Mine as well."

He turned to Kayla. "You snake and fool. Don't you see? Snakes never win. All your manipulation and death games will never overcome the power of…"

"Friendship!" Lace and Nosepickerfart cheered.

Scott sighed. "I was going to say 'snake hunting', but sure. Friendship works too."

Kayla chuckled. "You can't kill me."

"Wanna bet?" Pelican asked, before running at Kayla and striking her hard.

Kayla fell to the ground with a thud. And that was the end of her snakey reign.

~~~

The eight survivors went back to normal life pretty easily. Nothing was all that overturned in the real world.

Nosepickerfart created an army of children under the mentorship of DD.

DD found some decent friends (which mostly contained the survivors) and got back into fashion (albeit more monochrome this time).

Lace continued to be a stalker, but she shed her snakeskin and thrived without snakey tactics. Scott was very proud to have changed her ways.

Michael became the first person to have four ultimates— Ultimate Flirt, Ultimate Cutie Patootie, Ultimate Fashionista, and Ultimate Swiftie.

Kyle became a much happier person and started coming out of his shell.

Pelican adopted seventeen pelicans, all of whom she named Pelican, save for one— which she named Brubles, who was her best friend.

Alexx was hailed the smartest person in the world and managed to vanquish 96% of all racists.

And Scott. Little old Scott.

For a long time, he considered giving up his ultimate. He'd seen how paranoid and insane it had made him. But he came to realize it had also allowed him to see his friends for who they truly are. It allowed him to navigate his day to day life. He could never give the title.

So now, he wore it as a badge of honor, only in a different way. A way that, instead of demonizing everyone around him, brought out the non-snakey parts of them in that. A way that made him finally feel at true peace with himself.

~~~

"Ugh, you guys are ruining my photo again!" Michael complained. "Why are you all dumb?!"

Lace laughed. "Just pose everybody."

"And don't blink!" Brubles said. "Only I'm allowed to blink and ruin a photo!"

"No, you're not!" Pelican yelled. "If you ruin another photo, Brubles, I'll have to take away your pelican rights!"

Brubles gasped. "Never!"

Nosepickerfart beamed at the camera. "Say cheese!"

"Ew that is so lame," Michael said.

Kyle pointed at a button on the camera. "That's the timer. If you set it for twenty seconds, you might have enough time to get in the photo."

Scott nodded. "Thanks Kyle."

Kyle smiled. "You're welcome."

As Kyle took his place, Alexx smirked at Brubles.

"We should push Nosepickerfart into the lake as the photo takes," he suggested.

Brubles' eyes lit up. "We should!"

"Absolutely not," Scott told them, fiddling with the timer.

"Yeah dofuses." Nosepickerfart crossed his arms. "Ultimate Children can't even swim."

Lace laughed awkwardly. "Is the camera ready yet?"

Scott set the timer on the camera. "It is now!"

He ran to get into place. At the last second, the flash blinded them all, then the camera printed their picture.

Scott went and took it. "Thanks guys."

"Of course!" Kyle said happily.

"You're welcome!" Lace told him.

Scott heard screeching. He looked up.

Michael, Alexx, and Brubles did indeed push Nosepickerfart into the lake.

Scott sighed. "Time to go fetch a child."

"Careful of water snakes!" Lace called, teasing.

Scott smirked at her. "No worries."

"After all, I could sniff a snake out from a mile away."

The End: Water Snakes