Chapter 3:
Remnants
October 23rd
(PX)
[Recommended Music: PX, Muv-Luv.]
"How can you stand the stench?" Ayamine asks as Shirogane walks past to sit besides, causing her to edge away, features tightening.
"Come on, natto rolls ain't that bad, dude."
"So your taste is malfunctioning along your speech, huh."
"Ayamine, please," Sakaki softly scolds, tapping her glasses before clearing her throat through the chatter permeating the mess. "Well, what did you think of your first day here, Shirogane?"
"Fine, I guess. How to say it? The Instructor was more fierce than I expected."
"…Ahaha, she truly has a strong presence," Chizuru admits, to the nods of the rest as they eat.
Takeru scans their faces, saying nothing and continuing to eat "I was referring to the fact that she's getting upset at things she usually didn't, and how the lectures seem harsher than what I recall. Hell, I fought half serious against y'all and she didn't even try to stop me. And you guys… seem to think that's the norm here. Huh, well, just a little difference."
"And you also flaunted your abilities much," Mitsurugi says, sparing a concerned glance towards Takeru. "Your point was proven, yet I am loath to admit that she might have developed a grudge towards you."
"You're so dead. It was good knowing you," Ayamine gives him a pat in the shoulder while nodding solemnly, a grin on her face.
Causing Takeru to pale down a bit. "What?! What is she gonna do to me?"
"There is no reason to spur such fear in him, is there," Chizuru scolds in slow words, still eating.
"It's the truth," she insists, smiling at Shirogane.
Who groans a bit at the teasing. "Well, too late for regrets now. Whatever happens, happens. Are the lectures always this tough, though?"
"Oh, yes," Tamase nods, shrinking her shoulders, "the Instructor has redoubled the lessons given to us since a few months ago, since we…" gaze withers, lost in the whirlpools cast on her soup by the spoon.
Sakaki coughs, dispelling the downwards tilt of the other girls. "Anyways, we're almost at the end of October," she slowly starts, resting her chopsticks onto the table. "There's less than a month before the next CCSE. Shirogane, after today's displays I'm sure you can manage just fine. But I must ask anyway; Do you feel prepared to take the test?"
"Of course, more than ready to ace it," he nods firm, an instant and confident reply. "This kind of thing doesn't scare me anymore. Nothing could go and ruin the CCSE for us." he concludes, veering his gaze to each of them before going back to eat, leaving the spoon within his lips for a moment. "Unless the Game Guy causes an argument again, for some reason."
"What about the rest of you?" she asks the others, tapping her glasses.
Ayamine and Tamase give a small, but determined nod. Mitsurugi simply smirks while folding her arms.
So Sakaki sighs short, nodding. "A pointless question, huh? Well, thanks to Shirogane we have been reminded of how much we can still improve ourselves. With your help I'm sure we'll be ready to take on anything the test may throw at us. Once Yoroi comes back, we'll catch her up in no time to make sure everyone is on the same level. We'll clear it this time, without fail!" she declares, to a round of affirmations, clarity erupting in the others' eyes.
"Chizuru seems more passionate about leading us this time, she never was the type to give this kind of speeches… Another little change. It's nice to see her getting into the role this earlier, though," Takeru says, smiling as he stares at Chizuru.
Who then notices, but rather than look away leans a bit forward onto the table, hands rustling together as if to ward off the cold. "By the way… there's one more question I would like to ask, if it's alright with you?"
"What's up?" he simply answers, nodding back.
She closes her eyes, lips barely moving in breathless chanting, hands cuffing her own wrists before looking back to him. "You may withhold an answer, of course, but I'd like to know what prevented you from taking the CCSE with your previous squad, considering your aptitude."
All of them stare at Takeru, whose own eyes go to the table as he finishes his rice and mackerel without a single speck of hurry, despite the salty taste.
"Our training was going fine, everything looked most positive. But I…"
Wings of fire take to the sky from within the school.
Windows crack and splinter, the streets too. Everything's shaking, except the two pairs of wounded eyes that at him stare, lying limply on the ground.
Along all that in his mind flashes, only a flatline can Takeru hear at the moment, causing the grip on his spoon to almost falter as he rests it down.
"…I screwed up, big time. I failed them all."
She taps her glasses, arching one brow. "Did you fail some test, caused the squad as a whole to-" he shakes his head slowly, eyes closing shop too tight. "If not then, what happened?"
"Sakaki, perhaps it is not wise to ask," Mitsurugi adds, slowly sipping the final breaths of miso.
"No, it's fine, Meiya," he says, exhaling long, heavy. Still not looking up. "If I want you to trust in me, you gotta know at least what, well, sent me here."
"We shall not employ this against you, Shirogane. I believe we already told you of our privacy policy?"
"Yes, but this is… important, for real."
"May I ask why?"
"Because I got y…" biting the inner side of his cheeks, inhaling sharply, he looks up, up into the phantoms. "I got someone killed." Multiple people, multiple times.
"…What?" Mitsurugi's voice turned to just a whisper. All their eyes lost some shades of color, expressions as well, all equally petrified.
Licking his lips, barely joining his hands, he continues. "My fears and ineptitude caused things to end up like that. Had I been more brave I would have acted before stuff got out of control," he sighs, shoulders slumping and hanging his head, cold hands poking and probing all over him "Just like in Ouka, just like in Iceberg… When they truly need me, I'm never enough. All I can do is hope Sensei can save my ass. I wonder what the hell would I do if I were left without her aid. Probably lose my shit, for real."
"Shirogane, I…" taking a second to caress her air intake-like hills, she spoke slowly. "do not know what it is that happened but, I do not believe this is your cross to bear. Accidents happen all the time in this environment, and you were just a cadet at the time."
"…I must agree," Sakaki adds, unable to move or meet his shape. "Apologies for forcing such answers of you, yet accidents such as these cannot truly be placed on a single person's shoulder."
"And if it could have been your fault, you wouldn't still be military. Scapegoats are always disposed of in a timely and exemplary manner," Ayamine slowly whispers, grimacing and hanging her head as well. The other women of the table mimic her complexion, the overhead chatter caging their silence, making it apparent.
"…You could say me being here is kind of a punishment in itself," he says, sitting straight again. "If I weren't anymore, then at least there would be no more risks of leaks happening due to my strengthened causal pull. But so long as I live as an anomaly…" he laments, sighing before shaking his head. "In the end, my squad was… dissolved. And since I wasn't allowed into another team, I couldn't continue my training alone."
"And then the Professor reached out to you, to bring you here?" Chizuru asks as she brings a finger to her lips in a pensive gesture.
He nods, shrugging. "Pretty much. I won't hold it against you if you cannot fully trust me." Must be pretty hard on them to be training so hard just to be surpassed by a random guy that fell from the sky.
"Don't say that, Shirogane-san!" Tamase cuts in, hands and voice faintly quivering, unable to fully return his gaze. "Surely you've reached your level of aptitude because you've been training yourself for this chance, to… honor the memory of those you've lost, right?" she asks, almost stuttering, almost hunching down.
"Exactly. I apologize once more to have brought unpleasant memories back to you, I assure you that wasn't my intention," Sakaki again relents, giving him a small bow. "However, you proved yourself more capable than us. Your aptitude will surely be of great benefit not only to the squad, but for our nation as well. As a fellow Japanese soldier, I can only praise your dedication to keep honing yourself after such an incident," she nods strongly, giving a small smile in approval along Tamase and Mitsurugi, and only a faint nod from Ayamine as she swallows more pasta.
Takeru simply messes with his hair, heartbeats in a chained twister, ricocheting all over his ribs. "No, really, it wasn't anything so noble what drove me forward." Just the feeble hope of fixing all the mess I myself made.
"Regardless of the motives, your skills speak for themselves," Meiya says, arms folded as usual. "You bested all of us today, and while I don't plan to keep losing to you, I am looking forward to our sparring sessions. You'd be well served in being more proud of your strength, especially after what you had to go through," she affirms with a strong nod, and a few embers off her eyes.
He sighs and smiles small, returning half of the gesture. "Always setting me back to the right path with your thoughtful words. Whatever would I do without you, Meiya." He then coughs, rubbing one of his arms. "I just try to stay with my feet on the ground. I know I'm good, but there's someone out there who is better than me, so I can't relax." Not when I know what awaits in the future.
"So serious," Ayamine rolls her eyes.
Sakaki scoffs, hands tightening. "If you're only going to throw one liners then-"
"That's not a bad mindset to have, no. But don't push yourself too much, Special-kun," she looks right into his eyes, brows betraying her poker and lowering their inner side. "Not when you gave us a new objective to surpass. You just may be the edge we need to pass the CCSE, so don't focus so much on what was. Can't move forward if your eyes are not in the horizon."
"I… Thanks, Kei."
"It's Ayamine."
"O-Oh, right, sorry."
"It's alright, I said you shouldn't overburden yourself already," she says, going for a sip of water, eyeing the glasses. "We already have the Leader for that."
"What was that? Why don't you repeat-"
"Sakaki, Ayamine, do not begin again," Mitsurugi repines, lightly hitting the wood. "By goodness, can you two not spend one meal without arguing?"
"Y-Yes, we're all in the same boat," Tamase braves a stare, as menacing as a caterpillar. "Let's not give Shirogane-san an erroneous first impression."
"Ahem. Exactly," Sakaki asserts, nodding short. "Please do spare us your sass, Ayamine."
"Says Sassaki herself."
"How did you-"
"Pfft… Ahahaha," Takeru chuckles heartily, palming the table, halting their usual banter. "Haha- Cough. You guys are hilarious, for real."
"…What does 'for real' mean?" Mitsurugi asks.
"Oh, it's my way of saying something's serious or actually a thing."
"…I wouldn't call any of Ayamine's words hilarious in the slightest."
"Right back at you."
"See? You two can get along," he nods in cheer, both of them look away in protest. "But thanks for the honesty, really. I'll do my best to bring you guys up, if there's anything you ever need my door is always open."
"That's good to know," Chizuru nods, restoring her usual composure as she taps her glasses. "Let us do our best together from now on. Although, do not think we shall rely on you overlong. Coming on top of you is now my first priority."
"How bold of you, Squad Leader," Ayamine smiles, resting down the table.
"What?"
"You know, being so quick to the trigger. I'd say go get a room, but he even offered his own already…"
"W-W-What are you- I wasn't- This isn't about that!"
"Sakaki-san, please, it was only a joke!"
"Siiigh… Please ignore them, Shirogane. This is-"
"I can tell, don't worry, Meiya," he replies, lightly chucking at the embers throw between both dragons, and the poor kitty failing to stop the flames. "Still, it's good to see some things never change, here or there. Maybe, just maybe, everything can be better this time…"
The rest of dinner was spent on them debating on the day's training courses and lectures, some jabs shared in between. Sakaki excuses herself first, to go to the library, and the other three did the same shortly after, offering Shirogane to join in their nightly round of games. He refuses, citing some stuff he has to sort out, parting ways with them on the hallways. Directing himself to the elevator, to the XO's office, Takeru rests onto the inner walls, breathing calm and smiling, hoping.
Approaching the door and already forming a quick report for Yuuko, he tries and enters, only to smack himself against it, as he had done earlier today.
"What's up with this? Sensei never really locked her door up, unless it was an emergency."
He knocks the door, waiting a moment before the ding and Kouzuki's voice beckons him to enter. Past the ravine of papers and books, facing the monitor she is, fingers tapping the underside of her chin, expression blank.
"Good evening, Sensei," he salutes lazily after getting past the mess. "Is now a good time?"
"…Yes, thanks for coming yourself. As a matter of fact, there's something I was wishing to show you," she says, throwing a folder to the other end of her desk, standing and going towards the coffee machine. "Take a look at these papers, tell me what you think."
As he opens the folder, a name quickly appears in the papers. His own. There's information about 'his' own life, places where he should have lived, barely no intel on his studies or work, no medical records either. A date marked in red, the day of passing, was two years ago, but nothing of note was written about the matter.
"Sensei must have erased all the data she could from my profiles, and is probably asking my opinion on the matter. She never really told me anything about this last time, though. If this ain't enough, could we forge a new profile or something?" he wonders, tilting to look for her.
And finding a stare of pure dark metal returning his, along the sharp click echoing. A sound he recognizes very well, even if he's freezing in front of the two glares far more frosting than this night.
[Recommended Music: Old Battlefield, King's Field IV.]
"So, 'Shirogane'," Yuuko asks, taking half a step closer, raising her gun's aim to his forehead, "are you willing to talk now about the 'theories' in detail?"
"What… What are you-"
"Face the desk, hands were I can see them," she warns, aiming her verbal gun to the same target of her actual one.
Eyes wide, one twitching a bit under cold stabs to his chest, Shirogane complies, slowly so.
"…Now then, Shirogane, why don't you start telling me all about the theories?"
He doesn't move. Or seems to even be breathing. Full tilt, he'd call this.
Yet she doesn't spare a second for the devil. "The silent treatment will only gain you injuries, you know? Let's have a mature talk about this, I'm certain you can offer a compromise, can you not?" she offers in a low tone, with an even lower smile. Yet silent he remains, and so she frosts over again. "Is he playing dumb? No, I mustn't let my guard down yet, not until Yashiro confirms or denies my suspicions." After another moment of silence, she sighs while pressing the gun to his head, which makes him twitch. "It doesn't have to be this way, you know? You do realize that I cannot let you leave these four walls with the knowledge you already possess, do you? Something of the sort should have come up on your debriefing, mmh?"
"What the hell are you talking about, Sensei?" he asks in a dry whisper, all of him shaking subtly, the pieces sinking in.
"Oh please, stop with the Sensei. What's your answer, Shirogane? Are you willing to talk?"
Rather than talking, he moves his head slightly to a side, making eye contact. His cold, sharpened eyes bore into the Vice Commander, and she responds in kind with a new moon of her own. He doesn't flinch and remains standing there, expression falling dark more with every tick of the clock. His insides mirror it as well, so his nibbled lips tell.
"…So, care to tell me what's going on here, Sensei?"
"I am not certain I welcome your tone. Do you not realize the position you're in? Failure to comply with my demands will end in your death, I assure you."
"Huh… You're being serious about this?"
"Yes, 'for real'."
Downcast eyes lower their curtains, then are set ablaze. "Be my guest, kill me."
"What?"
"C'mon, shoot. Go ahead, be an idiot and kill the only person that can help you complete the 00 Unit."
"Really? Are you sure? Won't your employer get mad at you?" she whispers, smiling a bit.
"I've no clue what you're talking about," he fires back, scowling at both barrels.
"Huh, really? Tell me, what do you think about those papers then?"
"I suppose they're about this world's version of me."
"Not about you?"
"No, I told you I came from another world."
"Hmm… Not bad, boy. It took me much to learn to say half truths with as much poise as you."
"I had a good teacher, is all."
"Oh, mind telling me who?"
"…You, Sensei."
"What- You- Siiigh… You're testing me, boy."
"I mean, I ain't lying. Those papers are not about my life."
"Where's the proof?"
"Well, I moved to Hiiragi when I was… four, five? Eh, around that time. I came to live here to the house I told you about yesterday. I didn't live in so many different places as this world's me did. Feel free to have Kasumi confirm it," he shrugs slow.
She leans a bit closer, eyes narrow. "So the intel is not about you… But are you actually Shirogane?"
"No, no, my actually totally legit name is Ikite Naizo. Who the fuck else could I be, seriously?! Of course I'm Takeru!"
"Sigh, you really plan to stick to the parade, spy?" she asks, rolling her eyes, taking a step back, gun still aiming at his head. "Furthermore, the profile pertaining to this Shirogane shows that his name's kanji does possess a different reading than-"
"If you call me Takeshi again, I swear to causality I'm going to snap. This is kindergarten all over again…" he repines, facepalming hard and sighing even harder.
"Cut the chatter and let's get to business. Who sent you here, under that fake name?"
"Wait a sec, Sensei," he waves his hands slowly, gulping as she grips the gun again. "I am not a spy."
The XO grins, chuckling low. "You almost got me to believe your every word, you know? Feeding my pride like that, telling me something I wanted to hear for so long, hitting me while I'm weak. Thanks for reminding me never to lower my guard, boy."
"No, for real, I'm not-"
"Enough of this. Shirogane, who asked you to have me make the new OS?"
"No one," he instantly replies.
She frowns in further frost. "So you wanted that for yourself?"
"You could say that."
"What for? Money? Fame?"
"To help save lives."
"Please, stop lying. I'm willing to let you stay here if you tell me the truth, and our goals are in alignment."
"What are you talking about? I'm telling you, Sensei, I'm not a spy."
All of her tenses further, about to release the killer arrow. "…Really now? Then please answer the question, why did you want the new OS? Who sent you here?"
"I already told you."
"Yashiro hasn't sent anything. I see no shadow of doubt in him. Is he saying he's truly a Causality Conductor? No, that…" gulping down a desert, she returns his stare, only the beeps of the machinery and the tickling of the clock disturbing the air.
And yet, he can only look down, an abyss shackling his stomach, barely allowing air to filter to his lungs under the true dragon in front of him. "I'm not lying," is all he spares.
It only darkens an already bottomless pit.
"Persistent one, I'll give you that, boy. But no one that lived for sixteen years could have so few pages on their personal profile, this Shirogane literally had just one page worth of information. If not for the demands for answers of 1st Lt Tsukuyomi I wouldn't have thought to dig deeper into the public databases, into the Shogunate's one you were so afraid of. And lo and behold, there was a profile there with your name and grace in it; 1st Lt Shirogane of the IRG, MIA since 1998. The only question is, are you actually a Royal Guard or an agent trying to ruin my relation with the Empire?"
Since he says nothing, and makes no move either, she smirks a bit. "I pity you, however. If all your preparations learning about my work were to fail now due to being so easily found out, certainly death seems like a mercy."
"What the hell are you on about?! I told you, I'm no spy! Kasumi can confirm that, can't she?"
"…There are certain methodologies that are effective against ESP scans, boy. And anyways, I can't believe I actually fell for you tale. As if something like that could actually happen. The conductor is nothing but a pipeline," she says, dejectedly laughing, at herself, at everything despite how her posture loosens, sand slipping away under the battering wind.
"I'm not lying, Sensei. It's the truth!" Takeru insists, taking a step forward, a foolish step forward.
That makes the XO jump back, bracing, aiming at his face again. "Was it the Shogunate?" Would make sense with all the intel I left while Alt IV was under their care.
"No! I already told you-"
"America, perhaps?" All those games and stuff did resemble the American Way's doctrine, down to the plot he described of that 'tactical RPG'.
"Goddammit, can you listen to me?!"
"God damn it, indeed, boy." Eberbach, perhaps?
"I came here from another world. Why won't you believe me?"
"Because isn't it odd, everything you are?" she asks, frowning, a finger going to the trigger. "You are too good to be true, Shirogane. You're like a convenience store, lined up with solutions on demand to every setback I'm facing. The theories, this new OS to negotiate for the XG, your games that teach a random civilian how to be an ace pilot," to say nothing on all the top secret intel you possess, even as far as the identity of Subject K. The chances of such coincidences lining up are astronomically low… "When I saw how empty your report was I couldn't believe it. Why would a civilian have so little intel available? Of course the Shogunate would grow suspicious of you. But if you're a spy, if you were simply parading as someone else…"
"But everything I told you-"
"It was something important people already knew, or could have assumed."
"What about the pages of the theories, then, huh?!"
"Fabricated by the people who remained behind on the Imperial Research Institute when I decided to become UN. Either them, or the same ones pressuring the Empire towards a reinstatement of the Treaty, towards divesting the Shogunate of true influence." A little too similar to the issues I've had to deal with since a few months ago, ever since the base was put into operations under UN command to the dismay of some royals.
"And what about Sumika?! How could I know about her if I'm not really Shirogane Takeru and a time diver?!"
"There was a leak, not too long ago, regarding the presence of Subject K. It almost became a problem, to the point I had to request a cyborg guard to the UN," she says, smirking as she readjusts her grip.
"Wait, what?! For real? I didn't hear about that…" Shirogane pales, looking down. "Also, Subject K? The fuck's wrong with her, calling Sumika like that?" he wonders, despite the obvious veil of darkness the fox makes its nest in. Letting others get dunked on by fate isn't something extraneous to the Vice Commander.
Said XO sighs from her nose like a bull, almost wishing to rush at him in the same red blindness when tapping the trigger softly. "So it seems you do not know this world as well as you claim, mister time diver, huh… How low do you believe the chances of your fairytale being real are?"
"The same of your project getting completed," he deadpans.
The fuse tickled, Kouzuki sparks away. "Seems to me like you wish to rejoin the grave, mmh?"
"Oh, don't misunderstand me. I told you, I am Shirogane Takeru and your theory is correct, and we do win the war. I am not lying, Sensei."
"Vice Commander for you, boy."
"Oh, screw this! Come on, you really think I made up this crazy tale and brought gaming consoles to you just to fuck with your project?!"
"Others have done far more for less results. Deceit is not something I'm used to falling for, congratulations on that."
"What- But- Sensei, for real, I am being honest with you."
"Then, allow me to be frank with you, Shirogane. I went and inspected your room while you were training. And guess what this means?"
"First, that you ignored my warning, you absolute monster," he protests in bracing. "And second, that I don't have the theories on the base."
"Exactly. You don't have them," she smirks, circling around him. "I already know that talk about being from another world was all a lie. So, this is my last offer. Tell me who sent you here and why, to which organization you answer, where you got these Stallion 2 and Game Guy machines, who forged those two pages, how much you truly know about Subject K and I'll forgive your lies until now. So, what will it be?"
"Ahem… I told you, I'm not a spy. I'm truly a conductor," he whispers, fists balling up, shaking. "I'm only being careful, because I knew you were gonna jump the gun."
"Huh, really now? Then, where are the theories?"
"I… can't give them to you right now."
"I asked where are them, not why are they not in my hands already. You said we only have until Christmas to produce results, if my memory isn't wrong. Time is of essence, isn't it, Shirogane."
"Look, I know you must want them badly," he says, sighing hard, "but if I hand them over now, you might rush things and make the same mistakes again."
"My theory isn't flawed, it is not some fantasy nor fairy tale."
"I didn't say anything about-"
"I am more than certain everything is right! I've the capacity to make the required adjustments, I'm this close to reaching the answer, I know it! There is no flaw in my papers!" There can't be, after so long, after so many sacrifices. I cannot fail here!
"I-I know! Sensei, I am your ally, I am here to help you!"
"…Let's say I buy that, for now." Inhaling sharp, taking one step closer, aiming the barrel to his eyes again. "If that is the case, I want you to hand over the theories, right now."
"I refuse. If I do, you're gonna rush things and-"
A step forward, a hand outwards, steel almost rustles, cuddles an ear. Before a finger tenses inwards, firing off a deafening noise.
"A-Aaargh!"
A hole burned into the blue flag of the UN in the wall, Shirogane holds his ear in pain while supporting himself on the desk, a flatline echoing through the blast.
And darker than the smoke, more scorching too, she warns as she stares down. "If you really have them, you'll hand over the theories right this instant. If you're a spy, you'll talk about your mission here right away. Of course, unless you're a saboteur sent to mess with me."
Slowly calming his breath, rubbing his ear, he rises from the desk, a hand shakily covering his head.
"…L-Listen, I can't give you the theories. If you don't fix the flaw in the 00 Unit, the BETA will-"
BANG!
"There is no such flaw!"
Again, she shoots besides his ear.
"I know I am right, I am not insane."
Again, he yelps in pain along the burning blue flag.
"My deductions on causality are factually correct, they are not pseudo-science!"
BANG!
"This is your last chance, boy. Speak now or- Ow!"
In a split second, a clenched hand knocks the gun out of her hand, a repeating fist smacking at her wrist. The XO stumbles back, going towards the blackboard, looking for something to defend herself, driven by the swelling pain in one of her arms, the coldness falling all over her back. But when she turns around, the momentum stalls to nothing.
Because Shirogane hadn't moved an inch. He remains quietly looking her way, tears coming out of his eyes along hiccups as he tends to his ear.
"What the fuck is wrong with you, Sensei?!"
"Still calling me Sensei, huh? Cease the charade or I'm calling for-"
"We don't have the time for this shit, goddammit!" he roars, bearing his teeth her way, slamming the desk and collapsing a tsunami of papers unto the floor. "I'm not a spy for fuck's sake! I can't hand you the theories, and I can't tell you why because the ripples might screw us over if I do! I'm a fucking magnet for disasters, can't you remember?!" panting, he slumps down, eyes squinting and damp yet still burning.
"…Are you telling me you're truly a Conductor?" she asks, blinking slow, all the tension evaporating from her body upon the outburst, that she could tell was no lie.
"I've been telling you that since the start! You should know that better than anyone else!"
"And… N-No, where is your proof? If you're not a spy, why do you not want to give me the theories? Humanity's survival is at stake here!"
"I told you, because if I do you're gonna rush it to get results out! You need time to fix the-"
"My theory is correct, don't you dare repeat that!" After all I've done, after all these years, I'll make a mistake and fail? I complete the 00 Unit and it's flawed? I refuse to believe that is true!
"I'm not throwing shade, dammit! You know what I mean, look at you now! You never lose your cool, Sensei," he affirms, sighing and closing an eye when touching his ear too strongly. "What would happen if I hand you the papers now?"
"I… But I… Everything points to you- If the Shogunate pushes for answers on your profiles, if your presence here-"
"…Your life is going to be hell, isn't it," he asks, low, sitting onto her desk. She flinches, frozen in place by the faint spikes falling on her back at the dryness of the words, of the expression slipping like sand. "You told me that to my face by the way, last loop. My presence here, once we began to make progress for Alt IV, started to cause you problems. It was the only time when you snapped at me for real. So, yeah, seeing the state of the profile of this world's me now, I guess I can see the kind of legal shit they might throw at you… But I'm not a spy," he asserts, taking a limping step forward, still holding his ear, "I know what Alt V means for humanity. You can't have the theories yet, not until you can trust in my words and be calm enough to do things thoroughly."
She steps back, colliding with the towers of papers and causing a domino effect. The waves and crashes mimic her own expression and breathing as Kouzuki hangs her head, fists shaking. "…And, again, why should I trust in you? You're a literal convenience store, everything about you is too convenient. How do I know you're not deceiving me, exploiting my situation?"
He frowns yet again, his hands wringing in anger as a storm of white flies about in the office. Taking in air, looking down, Shirogane remains silent, until the last dangling paper met the mound on the floor.
"…Do you want to know?" he whispers.
"Huh? So, you're going to talk now, spy?" she smiles at him, showing her teeth, only to shut them as he grimaces, dampness back in his eyes.
"I guess… I guess I can show you a bit if it'll make you believe me, but only that and nothing more. Otherwise, the ripple could really screw us up."
"You insist you're a Conductor, then?"
"…That's what I am cursed to be, whether you believe me or not," he hangs his head, wilting down to the bone.
A sound startles them both, Yuuko's PDA dings about in her pocket. A new mail, from her assistant. Taking some steps back atop the hills of papers while never losing sight of him, she taps and opens it. Only to go slack-jawed.
"He's telling the truth. Sumika-san recognized his name and face, then went into shock. There's no hyper ceramic nor hesitation in him, I can hear his wails clearly."
"Then that intel was truly about this world's version of him? He truly is a living proof of my theory? An ally?"
Blinking does not change what appears in the screen, her mouth remains open all the while. Looking up, feet stepping erratically and almost stumbling upon an avalanche of papers under the heel, balance and sound seem to be entangling in the XO's mind.
"But if what he says is the truth and nothing but the truth, then my theories are flawed? His warning about the base being overrun by BETA will come true? But I- Everything I've done is- Why- How could-"
"So Sensei," the sliver of his voice brings her down back to Earth, to the shard of a gaze that remains burning. "Do you really want to see? It's not going to be nice."
"…I suppose I need to, if only to cast all doubts to the fire," she says, inhaling while restoring her usual mask, while staring at him as she walks towards him. "What exactly are you going to show me to prove that you're being truthful on all you've said?"
"…My memories. With Kasumi's help, I'll show you bits of some important stuff. I hope that with this you can regain your usual composure."
"So you're saying that… I'll truly make a mistake?"
"Not if you hear me out," he raises his hands slowly. "If you listen, you can avoid that outcome. So please don't try to pick up your gun. I don't want to hurt you, but I will defend myself if you try anything again," he warns, cracking his knuckles.
Taking another step forward into his bracing posture, she does not stop until they're almost face to face, gaze to gaze, blaze to blaze. "There is no justification you could possible have for withholding the theories from me. If you truly knew a parallel version of myself, you should know I am more than capable of dealing with a mere OS along them. Even if… there could be a flaw in the papers," she spits out, folding her arms.
"I do have a good reason. We can't screw this up or everything will go to hell again. I'm not willing to repeat that suicide, thank you very much," he says, scowling venoms back at her.
"Suicide? What are you implying?"
"…I won't be your pawn this time. I have my own set of goals right now, as I told you my status as an anomaly has to be fixed. But that won't come at the same cost as last loop."
"Am I right to assume you were the sole survivor of the Valkyries, then?"
"…Not just that. All the time, I'm the only one left, Sensei. I… won't let that happen again," he says, gritting his teeth. "I will be enough this time, no matter what happens. Our dreams won't crash against Iceberg this time, nor will they burn down along the cheery blossoms. Not while I'm still breathing."
"That's… an odd phrase… But if that's what you seek, why are you refusing to handing me the theories?!"
"Last time I did that you speedran the process and we almost lost the war."
"Is the flaw that severe?" he nods, she flinches back, hollowness in her lungs forcing a cough. "B-But I can fix it, I will. If you are an ally, you should know-"
"That you won't hesitate to bloody your own hands," he whispers, sighing to her frown. "From your perspective, victory takes priority. From mine, the methods do. If we are to work together, after you tried to kill me-"
"Interrogate."
"Killme," he spits out, "then our wishes have to be in alignment. My terms are simple; I want to restore peace to my world, and see if I can leave this one alive and with no large scale wars in the horizon. Is that agreeable to you or are you gonna blow my head off when I turn around?" he asks, crouching, grabbing the gun, offering the handle to the XO.
Who looks at it, back at his eyes, those unblinking pyres of fire with dampness still in their rims. Then sighs, waving a negative. "I suppose you can be given the benefit of the doubt, for the moment. Follow me," she says, turning around, and twitching as she sees the rampart of papers impeding their advance.
"I don't think you're cool with us stepping over all of this, right?"
"Mmgh… It is what it is," she grumbles, leading the way. "We shall be-"
"Going to the cylinder room, right besides this one."
"I see, so you already know."
"Isn't that proof enough, Sensei?"
"Vice Commander. And no, it is not. In any case," she says, squinting her eyes at the plowing trail he left from the desk to the door, "if you do anything to-"
"Sensei, one more word and I am going to be truly angry with you. You really think I'll hurt Kasumi and Sumika?"
"…I'm only warning you, is all," she simply says, leading the way.
Traversing the dark hallway uniting the main one with their destination, Shirogane rubs his arms off the chills the ambiance gives him, Kouzuki strides in long steps however. As the enter the room, they don't find anyone in there at first glance. Because the little bunny was quivering, hiding behind the cylinder.
"Yashiro, come on out," the XO orders, briskly walking up to the cylinder.
"…What do you need?" she asks, barely peeking.
"I would like you to scan Shirogane's memories, and link them back to me. Do you think you're able to do so?"
The little girl shivers and quivers even more, clutching the cerulean glass for dear life. "…I can try."
"Is something wrong, Kasumi?" Takeru asks, taking some faint, small steps to them.
She looks at him, almost cowering away. "Dark, it's all dark. You two are all dark, it hurts to see," she whispers, hanging her head and bunny ears, rope tightening, floor fading.
"Yashiro, this is an order. Your abilities are necessary."
"Sensei, maybe we should wait a bit before-"
"We are on a deadline, far shorter than I thought before. Also, for the last time, it's Vice Commander," she slithers out in poison, very much scalding.
"Siiigh… Sorry, Kasumi. I'll try and keep things… short. Can you lend us a hand?" he asks, giving a small bow.
Young Yashiro stares at them both for a moment through the numbness spreading to halt the overlapping of dark fog, relenting a nod then. "Understood. I shall try to share the images with as much clarity as possible."
"Thanks," he nods back with a small smile.
"Well, let's get started then," Kouzuki says, walking closer to the girl, extending her hand. "Close contact was beneficial for this, correct?"
"Yes. Please remain calm, even if your head begins to hurt," the assistant warns, flapping her bunny ears, before turning to face him, stalling the offering of her palm. Takeru again smiles down at her, a small shine of yellow rising through the otherwise gloom room. She finally accepts his hand, tiny fingers entwining with his as her bunny ears flap. "You may begin when ready, Shirogane-san."
"Kasumi, you can use my name, for real."
"Shirogane, can you get on with it already?" Kouzuki repines, her free hand curling a strand of hair, very slowly.
"Sigh… Sorry in advance. And Kasumi, brace yourself, okay?" he asks, and does not close his eyes until the little bun relents a nod, a tighter grip unto his hand.
Kouzuki imitates the motion, darkness claiming her sight. Silence, stillness, and the faint lukewarmness of young Yashiro's trembling hand is all she can discern. After enough seconds pass and her heels begin to tap on the floor, a faint shiver runs up her arm, shackling her nape, caging her head. Colors swirl, drops of ink thrown into a liquid substance, threads of smoke or incense threading a needle in midair, swirling, mixing, fusing, colliding into a large mass pulsating right before her. Resisting the urge to open her eyes, the twinge of pain behind them, she soon starts recognizing the forms, the patterns, the shapes.
And once everything falls into place, colors degrading to a slot, not bleeding away, the inside of a cockpit is what is now in front of her, her stomach bracing on its own at the rush of the area in the visor.
Chaos, orders, shouts, screams, all of it bursts into her ears, echoing distantly but too close at the same time.
And yet, that is not why her heartbeats almost stop. Those red spiders, all over the large cerulean egg, the Reactor.
The view changes, swirls in a flash to the nearby command center, its window splashed in crude, darker red from inside. Something burns inside her, clawing up her throat as the Shirogane from the memories is about to lash out, only to be stopped by a shout from Hayase.
"…For how long were we fighting during this incident?" she barely manages to wring out.
"One night," Shirogane deadpans.
"You're… You're shitting me. A single night did this to my base? Wait, why is Hayase staying behind?"
"This is a cause of the flaw I told you about," he answers, the scene fading to gray, to stillness.
"Wait, answer the question. What is-"
"She dies, fucking hell," he breathes out raw fire, softly rubbing the tiny hand gripping his. "It's okay, Kasumi. Won't force you to see that."
"…Please do not concern yourself with my wellbeing, I am able to deliver a projection of these topics, if you require it," she answers in a monotone, despite the quiver of knees and hands.
"Yeah, yeah. So Sensei, this is what I warned you about yesterday. And this," he sighs, the colors swirling, burning alive again, "is the result of our 'victory' that day."
Hallways turning into hospitals, bandages receiving no warmth from their patients, dry cries and shouts only rewarded by silence and the full weight of the departed. Rusted the sword, broken the soul. Nicked the sheath, bleeding the earth. The manic shouts, all the rows of limp bodies, who knows which were alive or not, even the stench of sulfur came to caress and kiss Kouzuki's nostrils through the projection. A dance of carnage, a dance she had already seen once before, when the light went out during the invasion.
"Is this worth the risk, Sensei?" he asks, now petting young Yashiro's head in slow motions.
"If… If it ascertains our survival, if it protects the planet, all the fallen would rejoice. We're a small price to pay for the future."
"…Do you truly believe that?"
"Of course I do. Faltering is not an option, running away even less. Apologies if you deem this cruel, but reality shows no mercy to anyone, boy. It is what it is."
"…Kasumi, I'm sorry for what I'm about to show you," he whispers, exhaling acid through clenched teeth. "Get ready to let go, okay?"
"Eh?" both the scientist and the assistant ask in unison, before feeling a creeping, crawling feeling make its way up their spines.
Small little ants, the tap of a spider, a trickle of cold water.
Spreading, all over. Sinking them, into them.
Everything gets distorted into a different image slowly taking shape behind the misty glass, faster, rougher than before. The fog reveals a wrecked TSF by twilight amidst ruins, Shirogane was sitting close to it for some reason. Kouzuki waits for something yet nothing happens, nothing at all.
Right before she snaps at the monotony, a voice waddles closer.
Marimo's voice. Sounding encouraging, almost motherly, she tried to get him back up by sharing insight, her own experiences when encountering combat for the first time, a second sun braving the eventual dusk.
"…Nothing like how she's being these days. I don't recall when was the last time she lowered her guard in this manner. Sigh… If he made her so proud, then I suppose he must have done something right. Perhaps, is this the aftermath of that incident?" she wondered as the image lost definition, tears flooding the eyes in the memory.
But then, he turned around.
And she saw everything going red.
Yashiro released their hands, giving out a small shriek, falling down.
Yet Kouzuki remains with her eyes closed, that image carved into her mind. Burning it.
That eyeball rolling on the ground.
A bunch of teeth splattered on the air, onto soil like confetti.
Flesh bombarded and torn apart like a madman's piñata.
And a BETA. A Soldier-Class biting the scalp, hair cleaning the teeth of giblets and grime.
"Shirogane, what the hell was that?" she asks, low, eyes still closed.
"…Your sacrifice. Is it worth it for you still, Vice Commander?"
"Marimo was… eaten?"
"…Yes."
"In my base? Under my watch?"
"Yeah."
"You're telling me- No, why would- Ugh… This is impossible! I would never let this happen!" she explodes, opening her sight, letting it fall in guillotine towards Shirogane.
Who is hanging his head, fully still, eyes still closed, too tight. "Of course you wouldn't let this happen. But that's not the point here."
"Then, what is the fucking point?!"
"You said it before, you'd do anything to win, right? Even releasing the BETA against your own troops."
"Wha- What?! I wouldn't- This is preposterous!"
"You released the BETA upon the base. Because you said we needed to be more serious about the war. You have some… I dunno, research thing in the underground, right?" he asks, her gaping features tell the rest. "Well, you said we needed 'proof' to back up our spoils to get the XGs when I asked you down the line. Didn't even show remorse for it at the time. So I ask again; Is this worth it, Sensei?"
"…But do my plans reach fruition? You are here, they must have. It wasn't meaningless."
"Yes, you are right. But," he takes a step forward, "that's last loop, not today. Do we have to let that happen?"
Lips part, close slowly, Kouzuki turns around. Clutching her forearms, replaying the scene in her mind, still smelling the sulfur thrusting into her nose. "…But her death wasn't in vain, was it? Surely, with your forewarning, if you tell the truth, I will have the time to devise a way to free you from whatever influence causality has on you."
"Wrong," he shoots down, sighing harder than her killer stare upon him, "because you run out of time by the end of things."
"I… Am I placed in custody or something?"
"You never told me what would happen, but it was not going to be pretty, I'm sure you can imagine."
"Then…" It means I do reach my goals, if all my detractors want me gone from the board to resort to such lengths, sighing, straightening out her coat a few times, she sighs the pitless collapse away. "Thenall the more reason for you to hand over the theories, if we are starved for time."
"I won't be complicit with their deaths, not again." Not while I still have cards to play.
"Why would- Again?"
"You heard me, Vice Commander. I'm not about to let you immolate yourself twice."
"Oh, a white knight, huh. Why do you care, if all you wish is to release yourself from causality's shackles? In the end it's my decision, the choice of this world, not an outsider's. If they sacrifice themselves, isn't it our duty to ensure their wishes are seen to fruition? You, as the veteran you should be, must be aware of this, too," she states, stepping towards the huddled shape between them, that was blocking her ears as if under water, softly bringing her back up. "All the debts we have taken must be repaid, they wouldn't want it any other way."
"…Are you sure about that?"
"Yes, I'm certain all the fallen in this war held the same hope you now harbor. There is no glory here, no power nor honor, no majesty or gold. Only the cesspit we must keep our future from falling into, that is all. All the deceased gave us a feather for our clipped wings to skirt the surface one day more; Why would you refuse their efforts to reach completion, Shirogane?"
For a moment, he merely returns her gaze. Turning around, walking to the cylinder, he softly places a palm on it, rubbing the glass in tender strokes. Far slower are the words that almost do not spill from his lips. "Someone once told me I led an enviable life, back home. I never was forced to part ways with anything, always had my way with things. It wasn't perfect, but I was content with life."
"…I see. Is this world now too bleak for your… sensibilities, perhaps?"
"Sensei, what is the most important, crucial skill a person must nurture?"
"Hm? Well… I suppose, the ability to seize opportunities, to not shy away from any if presented with the chance. Hesitations begets no beginnings."
"Heh, you almost sound like Meiya," he chuckles a bit, his fingertips leaving the glass, his eyes on the one inside. "So then, just, I dunno, put this in your head for a sec. Imagine I wasn't here, imagine I never arrive here. What happens?"
"…Do you know?"
"You fail, even when I do arrive sometimes. I was floored back then, it felt meaningless to keep on with the training under Alt V."
"Your point is?"
"You said the sacrifices are worth it, so long as we defeat the BETA. That should be the end goal, right?" he asks, she slowly nods as her features scrunch in puzzle. "But Sensei, if you're not here, who is there to stop humanity from killing itself again?" he asks, turning back, expression glitching.
"You are only assuming-"
"I'm not. Because I lived through that, part of it. When the curtain falls, there's nothing left but bloodshed," he walks up to her, causing Yashiro to hide behind the lab coat and quiver. Yuuko remains still, meeting the ballista, readying her own. "If you won't even consider my warning, would you let me show you?"
"…Yashiro, can you?" she asks, gripping that small hand.
Young Yashiro stalls her answer, simply bobbing her head mechanically and aiming for his hand, shivering and almost recoiling upon contact.
"It's okay, Kasumi. I'll… keep it brief, there won't be any deaths."
"I-I am able to perform my duty as-"
"Don't overdo it," he tells, petting her head. "Now then, Sen-"
"Vice Commander."
"…I hope you don't come to regret your decision to not listen."
She simply scoffs, softly closing her eyes, letting the whisper, the quiver sink her darkness into the spiral of colors once again.
Lasers burn the sky, Grapplers and Destroyers run rampant through the training grounds killing many soldiers in a matter of seconds, the operators ordering them to hold their ground despite the fact that such orders are clear suicide.
The wasteland extends forevermore, grayness intoxicating the sky, thickets of darkest smoke veiling the carnage. A tsunami of Tank-Class, a quake made by Destroyers, Grapplers jumping as if in the middle of a pogo, Forts hiding the horizon.
And all the while, the blue dots fade away. Pictures gone, trampled over. Bent fangs, charred meat, molten hopes and dreams. Chairs forever fated to be empty, empty as the nowhere the tears awaiting them will fall into.
"The only thing… a dead soldier can do!" a voice rasps through the common channel, an explosion ensues, blinding the surrounding area.
No time is allowed for Kouzuki to piece things together, her sight is cast into darkness under a Fort.
"I-It buuurns! Ahhhh! M-My nails a-a-are sliding off. Ughaaahh… Shi-Shirogane, kill me, please!"
Gripping the small hand that wants to let go, that pulls back, clawing a bit, Kouzuki is left surrounded by Tanks, that fail to reach her amidst the rush of the machine she's in. Despite the gurgling in her ears and throat, despite the burning in and out.
"Nooo! Takeru-san, please, help me! I-I don't wanna be eaten!"
In the end, however, only the one soldier remains standing atop blunted corpses, buried promises, lost comrades. Only Kouzuki's shared sight marches forward, a blade on each hand, launching the machine headfirst into the next horde, sending tides of gore over the Forts' heads.
"…What is this, Shirogane?"
"Operation Iceberg, the prelude to Alt V."
"Where is this taking place?"
"Is this worth it, XO?"
"You still survive, even against these numbers. If so-"
"Are their deaths worth it, all of them? If you say yes then-"
Amidst BETA she cannot count, the battle comes to a halt. All of the monsters cease their advance, looking up. Up at many sparkling points piercing the heavy metal clouds, growing, and growing. Casting a dark purple tint over the land, growing, growing darker. Falling right on top of their location.
"-is this also what they wished for, Vice Commander?"
In a blinding flash, her vision spins, whirls, she cannot tell. All that remains is a light too strong, eyes that close, then darkness like she had never seen before baring an abyssal jaw her way.
"Is this… a G-Bomb?"
"Many of 'em, in fact. I only survived by fleeing into a gate. By the time they were done doing their thing, well… See for yourself. The 'fruit' of the fallen."
But there was nothing to look at.
Nothing at all. Nothing above, nothing below, nothing around.
Not a single enemy. Much less an ally.
Only an eternal wasteland basking in twilight.
Silence, absolute and unchallenged.
Only broken edges, bent suits, jagged limbs, stomped tags, and a picture, a clover, or other such charms flying about in the lack of air caused by the bombs.
Ashes and shards sing a wordless requiem by howling into the wind, howling alongside the Shirogane of that day upon the lack of any one thing around.
The sky, until then gray, turns darker. Clouds zoom in, a vortex of thunders claiming the entire horizon. Falling closer, and closer.
Rain. Incessant in its stride, hitting like bullets all over.
A wave, water piercing the skyline. All that was in the wind is drowned, pushed back to the abyss.
Another wave, of people. Growing distant, stuck on the docks, raising small ones and begging, crying, screaming. To no avail, to gunshots even.
Under the cage of gunpowder not even the rainfall could break cracks spawn in everything. The people fall, the water rises, plushies and letters washed to nothing in the stream, tags and badges sinking down along shells and bloodstains, it all grows dark.
And remains dark, for a long while. A sound scatters, but it doesn't come from inside as everything had been.
Only then did Yuuko realize Yashiro had let go of her hand, and as she opens her eyes finds the little assistant rubbing Takeru's shoulder. Slumped to his knees, he was covering his face with both hands, trying to not lose what few breaths were still in him.
"H-Hey, what's wrong? Did-"
"Please, give him a moment, Professor," Yashiro pleads, bowing her head.
"I'm- Wheeeze… I'm fine, just give me a sec."
"No, you are not," young Yashiro insists, bunny ears flapping, rubbing his back. "Come on, deep breath, please."
"…I'll wait in the office. Yashiro, you… bring him once he's ready," she turns around, nodding sharply to the barely returned gesture from the little bunny. All said sturdiness flickers, melts a bit more with every step taken in the dark hallway.
It hurts, the gyrating burns in her stomach.
It hurts, a lot. Almost as the prodding that almost releases a geyser out of her throat.
It hurts, so much. For even after everything, a mimic of the drought in the Shirogane from the memories is left imprinted into her.
Snailing to the desk, barely able to climb the mountain of papers, Kouzuki cannot muster the energy to prepare coffee. Simply spilling her all onto the chair and spin, spin it all together is what she can do. Chaos had knocked on her door, inviting a date and finding her with the zipper down, papers on fire. For as stoic as she always remains, that darkish purple flash, the sphere of nothingness truly is a limit she, and many others, couldn't simply bear to cross twice. A melting face, spilling out of order within the circle, her best friend smiling, or seeming to as she's stretched by the tendrils devouring clouds.
"…If all else remains as his last experience hints at, nothing will be between the rest of HC and my research. Nothing at all between the protocol to digitize a mind, with consent or not, nothing between my reports on the effects of a G-Bomb and its radiation on both environment and humans," she concludes, again cradling her head in her hands, massaging her scalp slowly. "However, victory over the BETA is assured on that road…"
The door beeps and slides, the assistant lends a shoulder for Shirogane to limp into the room alongside. The roles are reversed as he helps her bridge the gap between the sofas and the doors, almost falling to the papers.
"Are you feeling well enough?" the XO asks in poker.
Takeru shrugs, crashing down to the cushion. "Yeah, feeling 'well'. Let's leave it at that."
"Apologies, I… don't know what I expected, to be honest. I suppose, you were not lying."
"No shit, Sherlock."
One of her brows twitches, she goes for a spin. "I assume your warning is based on what you remember from your life post-Iceberg and Babylon?"
"Yeah… I honestly still don't remember much from that, but, well, you saw what madness that looked like," he admits, hunching forward.
"Anything else you feel comfortable telling me about those memories?"
"All I can add is that we were told all of Eurasia ended up underwater. Of course, the Empire also ended up submerged, I think."
"What? All of… Underwater?!"
"Yeah, something about the gravity getting rekt or something."
"Getting what?"
"Fucked ten times to Sunday, basically," he tells, sighing and yawning at the same time.
"I… see. You won't budge on your stance, will you."
"Neither have you ever."
"Aren't you right," she chuckles, smiling a bit. "Do you truly think those accidents could be avoided?"
"We already can get to that point by playing our cards in the same sequence, more now that we have the theories here already. The real deal is, do we have the capacity to try something different?" he asks, staring.
She stops the spin, holding the silence, yet he does not recede. "And if we're left with no other choice?"
"…Then I won't fault you. If our goals are not compatible, let's… just help each other for a while. We'll cross the next bridge when it comes up," he says, heaving another half sigh, half yawn.
"That is acceptable. If I may, could I… ask you something about that last mission?"
"Yeah, sure."
"The G-Bombs… Did they work?"
"…No."
"Do you remember it clearly?"
Clutching his hands closely, as if holding an injured pigeon, he heaves another sigh, closing his eyes. "There's one memory, I think, from the days after Babylon. I'm taking out a Reactor with some other pilots, there's a bunch of BETA everywhere again. I think I… find a comrade there, I- Cough! Cough! Urgh…"
"Hey, what is it? Yashiro, what's wrong with him?"
"It's all dark inside," she says, again massaging his shoulder. "Please, relax. T-Take a deep breath…" she pleads, trying to dispel the dark crayon lines from his complexion, to not stare too deep into an abyss she could not detect a bottom from.
"T-Thanks, Kasumi," he smiles, wiping his mouth as the coughs let him go. "Well, it's always like this. I put someone out of their misery, but simply remembering that is enough to choke my heart silent. So, well, the answer is no, there's still BETA after the G-Bombs. Plus, I can give you the reason why."
"Hm? You can?"
"Yep. The G-Bombs cannot make it to the Reactors on their own, the orbital divers have to infiltrate the hive after the bombing. But with the mess made on the gravity, the divers probably couldn't launch. Or if they did, were left without support to finish their mission. All it takes is a single hive surviving after Babylon to send the world into ruin, after all," he notes, hollowing himself out again, coughing as he hunches a bit.
Kouzuki folds her arms, if only to halt their quiver. Aware of breathing and heartbeats, a cold feather tickling her ears, she spins in silence for a moment. "Shirogane, if I were to accept your terms, would you be willing to commit to my plans?"
"I'll help you out, yeah, but I'll speak up when I think I have to."
"…But will you follow me even if we must take cruel choices at times?"
"If you mend the causal anomaly I am and remain with power to deter the assholes that used me and my comrades as meat shields. I'm not gonna complain at every little thing but… we might clash a few times," he admits, messing with his hair.
"Fair enough. Do you still want us to work together?"
"No, of course not. I'm sure I'll find the next authority in quantum physics on a nearby park to help me instead."
"…Are you always like this or are you merely upset?"
"Yes."
Groaning at each other, he rolls his eyes, she goes for a spin. Young Yashiro sighs, shaking her head.
"…I shall try and heed your pieces of advice-"
"Warnings."
"Sigh, yes, yes. I shall try and keep them in mind, however, I will need you to start contributing to my project if you insist on withholding the theories," she asserts, leaning forward, staring at him and nowhere else.
"I mean, that's easy peasy. Let's just start the XM3's development, and I can lend a hand to the Valkyries in their trainings or something."
"…You think you're able to match their performance?"
"I did last loop, they certainly won't get worse by sparring with me," he offers, shrugging. "Also, we could use the consoles to teach them the basics of the XM3 while we iron out the bugs again. Actually, can we make more consoles here?"
"I guess? Do you truly want to use these games to train people?"
"We tested them yesterday, didn't we?"
"And they were far too complex to understand. The TSFs moved too erratically, the knights were too savvy for their own good. Also, why was that soldier climbing that ladder so slowly anyways?"
"You simply cannot appreciate the genius of Fideo Gojima… same as back home, too."
"Wait, I played these games?!"
"Yeah, that's how you got the idea for the theory, actually. From those other games you didn't want to see."
"Why didn't you tell me that?!"
"…You never asked? Anyways, yeah, GunParade Extra and Unlimited are what inspired Sensei back home, apparently. She bugged me to play the final part while she helped me before… she had to teleport me forcefully, but that one was also affected by the leaks, probably. Check them out when you feel like it, maybe it'll work to get you ready to review the theories even?"
"Siiigh… Fine," she accepts, standing to make more coffee. "I'll see what I can arrange. By the by, how would you rate your piloting skills?"
"I'm awesome."
"…Anything else?"
"No, not really. I am the champion of the game, so it literally doesn't get better than me as a teacher. If I get more time under Cpt Isumi I'll get even better too. Win-Win."
"…I suppose. I'll allow it, as a test for your usefulness," she says, filling the cups, Shirogane standing to help with young Yashiro's cocoa. Once each has their cup and have a moment to drink, the XO slowly spins again. "Before I forget, do you know what's up with the records of the other you in this world?"
"No. You only told me he was dead and to not think about it too much. I don't know anything about his life," he nods with an open shrug.
She returns the gesture, slowly sipping and gazing at young Yashiro, who gives a subtle nod. "I see. So that's why he didn't knew he was a Royal Guard and why the Shogunate came after him in the other worlds. If he was merely a normal boy or a desperate child trying to change the future, I may have realized he wasn't a spy. Being so calm and bringing so much help almost played against him." And after a brief moment, she spins back to the usual poker, facing him again. "Shirogane, about the first memory you showed me…"
"Yeah?"
"How- How did it happen? What can you tell me?"
"Well," he takes one gulp of coffee, resting the cup on his lap, holding it softly, "due to the flaw Sumika has, the BETA managed to outsmart us."
"…What? You said it only took one night, correct? All data points to them needing nineteen days at the earliest to assimilate our tactics, however?"
He strokes his chin as he leans back in the sofa. "They started to use our tactics, yeah, that's how they almost destroyed the base. But that's the thing, you found the flaw due to that mission. And that's all I'll say," he nods to the ceiling, going back to his cup.
"A flaw in the 00 Unit. The BETA using our tactics right after I complete it… Two-way communication, perhaps? Motoko-nee said, she said the overheating issues are still very much there in the cyborg tech too. But when? The times do not add up, if the 00 Unit must connect with-" her spin halts, her heartbeats skyrockets as her lips part on their own, recalling the large cerulean egg at the deepest part of the base. "I see… That's it, isn't it. Then that caused the base to be overrun. Maybe that last mission he mentioned,he said suicide before. Considering how that extremist faction has been lobbying as of late…"
"Hey, Sensei?"
"Yes?"
"Can I ask you something now?"
"Of course, what is it?" she says, spinning back into his sight.
"Why did you try and kill me?" His gaze lunges into her, fully open, unblinking.
She looks down, shrugging the sting away. "I panicked after seeing your profiles, I was convinced this was a ploy to sabotage me."
"Why?"
"Well, because you're perfect. Bringing a solution for almost every setback I'm facing, offering improvements to my plans, and your services as well, what else could I ask for? You're a godsend, an unlikely ally I didn't dare to hope for. And in this state of affairs that is very much odd. Apologies again, I let my fears take the reins," she admits, giving a short nod.
Yet he doesn't return to his usual relaxed stare, cup still held prisoner. "You seem like about to pop. I've only seen you like this twice, and it's never a good sign. Allies are not something someone as important as you should lack."
"I am important, yes, but I've lost much support in these last months, to be honest."
"For real?"
"What do you expect, really? The UN and the Empire's relations are really tense right now, what with the Treaty and Alt V hovering over our heads, and me being originally an Imperial researcher puts me in the eye of many detractors," she rolls her eyes, resting the cup on the desk, tongue lashing out poison when recalling derailing meetings. "Imperial people say that I sold myself to America, that I betrayed Japan. Some in the UN say I might go maverick and give my research's results to the Empire. Didn't I tell you this last time?" Maybe I didn't trust him that much before? Or was he focused solely on completing Alt IV?
" I never heard this kind of thing from you before, no."
"I see. Back to the point then. When I read your report and saw that there was so little information, I couldn't help to doubt you. Everything spiraled from there, and when I couldn't find the theories, well-"
"You lost your shit, I get it," sighing, he shrugs and smiles her way.
"…I suppose everything has been clarified now," she nods back, coughing back to poker. "Both of us need the other, so I guess I can give you the reassurance that I won't hide things from you, pertaining to our accord. I'll protect your back, so long as you contribute to my project."
"And I'll keep giving you warnings, as long as you lend me a hand with my anomalous state. That'll do, Sensei."
"…You still will call me that?"
"If you wanna keep things professional, I'll catch the hint, Vice Commander."
"Sigh… Just, whatever. Do what you like," she ruffles her hair, suddenly sighing long, hunching a bit. "Anyways, you return to your room. If anyone asks what were you doing, tell them you were aiding me in a special mission. I'll contact someone to deal with your records, it's going to be a tough call. But don't worry, I'll get it done. Bring the consoles here tomorrow, I'll start working on making more of those. That shall be all for now."
"Fine by me. By the way, the contact you mentioned… wouldn't happen to be Sakon Yoroi-san, right?"
"You know about him too?" Why would I have allowed him to meet you? If you're as important to the 00 Unit as it sounds, I see no reason to let him get close to you.
"Yeah. Isn't he on the Ministry of Information? You sure it's safe to let him in this kinda thing?" he asks, Yashiro nods in agreement.
"I'll tell him you're listed as 'dead' here despite you having been abroad for a few years, since I got that bit prepared and done already. Then I'll ask him to help me with the fixes here."
"Alright, just be careful. I think you already know, but he can reach the Shogun. If you give-"
"Wait, how do you know that?!" Did he meet her before or did I mention it to him? No, if he was solely focused on the project, why does he know of Yoroi's reach in the Shogunate? Why did I deem it necessary to have Shirogane know that intel?
"I'll tell you another time, but be careful with what you tell him." He says as he ruffles his hair, letting some air out softly. "I know you can deal with him just fine, but better safe than sorry."
"Now I want to know how you met him and how much you know of the Shogun. You're one big, thick bag of surprises, Shirogane. Though, if word gets out that a 'dead' Royal Guard is working for me…" she shivers, running her fingers over her neck. "You're right, especially with how some people in the Shogunate see me now."
"If that's all, I'll be going," he slowly gets up, rubbing his knees, waving off young Yashiro's attempts to help.
"Shirogane, one last thing."
"What it is?"
"Nothing will happen to this base in this world. You just focus on helping Squad 207 as much as you can for now. Leave the rest to me. Alright?"
"Yeah, I know. I don't think I can help you much outside of that as of now, anyways," Takeru admits, hanging his head, the rest of him falling even more. "Good night, you two. Oh, and thanks for the help, Kasumi," he smiles at her, she tilts her head. Shirogane chuckles as he waves at the little bun, then leaves.
A moment of silence extends, both finishing their drinks.
"So Yashiro, he didn't lie about anything?"
"No, he believes everything he said is the truth, and he was on edge the whole time."
"And… he truly is on our side?"
"Yes. He does hold you in high regards, despite some conflict in his heart. He also…"
"What is it?"
"…He seems to be fond of me?"
"Is that so? Do you dislike his emotions?"
"…I don't know. He seems… kind. I don't understand. He isn't afraid or suspicious of me."
"But you think we can rely on him?" she asks. The little bun closes her eyes, taking her time to answer. When she opens her eyes, she merely gives a nod before drinking some more. "Well… If you say so," Yuuko sighs, shrugging. "So Yashiro thinks he's our ally. That's way more than what many have gotten in their first evaluation."
And so, spinning away, the XO ponders and wonders the news. How a living proof of her theory was now within her grasp, worrying and looking out for her despite the shadows within. Someone who didn't mind young Yashiro being near despite her ESP capabilities. It was like before, but a bit different. The roots were still in midair, yet the flowers were extending and trying to fly.
And yet, a thorn remains. Stopping the spinning, directing her assistant to try and bring some order to the fallen papers, Yuuko dives headfirst into the databases and folders, cracking her knuckles and codes apart.
"There's still the matter of this world's Shirogane lingering open. He was a Royal Guard, so I'll have to deal with it carefully. 1st Lt Tsukuyomi wasted no time in voicing her aggravations, and she did try and access his profile earlier today. And he did say that the Shogunate always realized something was wrong with his situation, and thought it serious enough to warn me about Yoroi. After this blunder, I cannot allow his opinion of me to fall further before I gain his compliance to the project's benefit. Perhaps, I should assign an escort to him, someone to watch over his back…"
The way up and out seems uneventful, Shirogane slowly limps out of the elevator, yawning a bit. Usually cheery, the now hunched soldier directs himself to the trackfield, to get some fresh air. Contrary to his expectations, Mitsurugi is not present. Small is the sting in his heart at the emptiness, but it is there nonetheless.
So he sighs and yawns again, posture slumping a bit. Alone he steps outside, watching the stars amidst the silence. Simply letting the distant echo whimpering within him run its course, from his fingertips to his nape.
"I know I swore to never regret things, but it is hard not to fall to a 'what if', Sensei," he admits, resting against a wall as the gale blows. "Sigh… I know this isn't my Yuuko, I know, but to see her so willing to shoot me… Damn."
Rubbing his forehead, where an odd headband used to be, those last days in peace back home come to mind. The tournament where he awoke to his memories, the ensuing peace, the nothingness that happened, until everything happened at once. Life's like a loop-the-loop rollercoaster for the soldier, a bit too literally. And the safety measures seem to have been left in off-side.
"Sensei only looks so distraught when shit hits the fan, like when she threw her dear theories at me, or those days before Christmas. No idea why her reaction is different, but if it tells something is that she sees me as a more important piece than before. Well… compared to the ruckus I made last time, I guess I must look a bit more reliable?" he wonders, smiling up at the stars before sobering up, recalling it all again. "Remember Sensei's advice, it's all in how you approach things, positive and negative. Maybe there is a way to use the Nucleus to my advantage, if only to bring the others up to skill faster…"
Repeating the oath he screamed when in the reactor as the cerulean fireflies took all away, the cold wind of the night soon losses effectiveness. Standing straight and cracking his neck, recalling a gun offered to him, oaths and promises to fulfill all over again, Shirogane nods to the stars, to those departed towards them, and turns around, jogging to the way back inside.
And stopping so suddenly he almost slides to the ground.
"My, what a coincidence to see you here. Would you have a moment to platicate, Shirogane Takeru?" so imposed the dry ice verbal barrage with emerald eyes blocking the way, the feral query of 1st Lt Tsukuyomi.