"Hey. How are you doing?" Teylan sidled up to me. I was sitting in the underground cave beneath the Resistance HQ, staring deeply into the fire. I had been pensive as of late. I kept waking up from horrible nightmares and I wasn't able to sleep well.
The more blood and death I saw fighting the RDA the more clear my memories of our abduction became. When I was in TAP they had managed to convince me that we were abandoned and the humans saved us. But now that I was away from their indoctrination the truth was glaring. Our small group of misfit orphans were all that was left. I still didn't know the details of the incident and who was responsible, but I could still hear the screams of our people even when I was awake.
"Teylan…" I looked up at him with a sigh. I was tired, so tired that my eyes were weary and hooded and there were dark circles under them.
"You look like hell, sister. Did you just come from a hard mission?" He plopped down beside me, the brim of his hat shading his eyes.
Sister. That was what my clanmates called me. To the Na'vi I was just the Serantu. The humans referred to me as 'you'. I hardly recall my name anymore.
Aha'ri, my sister, was dead. This band of traumatized children was all I had. I could no longer trust Alma. She did save us from extermination at TAP, but if my dreams were to be trusted she was there when we were taken. Even if she saved us from the fight she let Mercer gaslight us for years about our tribe. About how we were unwanted.
I purposefully kept this suspicion about Alma from the others, knowing they would react with anger, and the secrecy didn't help our relationship. Nor and Ri'nela were closer than I could ever hope to be to either of them, and it was clear they were headed towards becoming a mated pair. Sure, Teylan was nice to me, but it seemed like he was willing to turn his back and stay with humans at any point.
"What are we, Teylan? Are we human? Are we Na'vi?" I curled into myself. I wanted to confidence Teylan had. The confidence to love human tech and clothing and accept a new reality. He never remembered the time before. TAP was all he knew, so he never tried to be different. I was no different, but I at least had the small things like the taste of our cultural food or the melody of our songs.
"We are us." He replied with a gentle smile. It was such a Teylan response that I couldn't argue.
"I don't feel like I fit in anywhere. I have a burning hatred for the humans now and I don't know where to put it. Every time I sleep I see Aha'ri and I hear screams. I can't sleep! I don't want to feel this way. I know the humans here are friendly and want to help. But I am confused. And I can't sleep!" Gritting my teeth I raked a hand through my bangs, pulling them back from my forehead. "I can't sleep, Teylan!"
"It's okay." Though I must have seemed crazy to him, Teylan spoke to me calmly. His hand patted my back and I relaxed, letting out a deep breath.
As soon as I was able to catch my thoughts again I thought of a particular face. There was someone who I felt a connection to, and I wondered just where that avenue would lead me. If I was brave enough I could start a new family, but I was still afraid of rejection. Because I was too human.
"Hey, want to hear me out?" I glanced over to Teylan to see him nod and smiled, knowing he would.
"In the Aranahe Clan I met a young hunter. He taught me how to use a heavy bow and he guided me to bond with my Ikran. I… keep thinking about him." I looked down at my hands, flexing them and remembering my first use of a heavy bow. "When I'm with him I don't think about the other things. My soul feels at peace."
"Maybe it's because you like him." Teylan was always so straightforward, and his human way of thinking made the answer quite cut and dry.
"It isn't that easy with us, though. Na'vi don't just get in casual relationships. It's forever. I don't think I have the confidence to approach him and ask him to love me when I am so broken. And the Na'vi hate the humans… the 'Sky People'. When he sees how I was raised by them… won't he hate me too?" I grabbed some dirt and tossed it at the fire, enjoying the effect of ambient luminescence sparking in the flames.
"If he does then he isn't worthy of you. You are everything we have heard the Na'vi to be. You move without a sound, respect nature, wield a bow with ease, wear the clothing and the songcord, and you've even been chosen by an Ikran. We might not have been raised Na'vi but you naturally pick up the behaviors and methods. You just have some extra life experience." His innocent smile tugged at my heart. I couldn't help but pat his head, feeling the familiar seams of his cap.
"What would I do without you?" I laughed. It was true. Out of all the remaining orphans, Teylan was the youngest and felt like a little brother. My heart ached at the loss the ones who didn't make it out but if Teylan had died he would have left a tear in my soul that matched Aha'ri.
"Sister, perhaps you should have a talk with that hunter. Maybe he feels the same way. You'll never know if you don't try."
It was solid advice.
"Yeah. Maybe I will."
I wanted to face Eetu with a clear mind, but sleep still didn't come to me. Teylan easily drifted off by the fire and I sat with him for a while but I grew restless. I had the courage to face Eetu now so I couldn't bring myself to squander it by waiting around.
Walking quietly out of range of Teylan, I held my hands around my mouth to amplify my sound and called my Ikran, Telisi. She heard my whooping and fluttered down to me from her perch on the top of the Resistance building. I reached out and stroked her muzzle, admiring her green and yellow patterning.
"It's good to see you today, Telisi." I crooned. She noticed the dark circles under my eyes and squawked back out of concern.
"I'm okay, really." I assured her. "I just want to go find Eetu. Do you think you can help me sniff him out?"
She nodded her head, her neck bobbling. I grabbed my braid and connected our queue together, the neuron strings weaving and creating tsaheylu. Easily hefting myself up, I straddled her back above her wings, feeling her powerful breath. Willing her to take off, she shot into the sky and let out a long screech.
It was a bit of a jaunt from the Resistance HQ to the Aranahe Hometree, but I always found the flight soothing. I wasn't aware that in my state of exhaustion the soothing nature meant my brain would fizzle out and relax, dipping into slumber. I fought the fogginess because I knew that my groggy mind was leeching into Telisi. We started to veer off course, her long wings tilting and drifting our path to the side.
I was half asleep so I didn't realize that Telisi had realized something was wrong. Instinct took hold and she was frantically trying to roost. She had been gaining altitude, going to where she was most comfortable in the floating rookery above the Hometree. I reached a point where I could no longer stay awake and I blacked out for a moment just as Telisi jolted upwards towards the next rock. The sudden shift knocked me backwards off of her back, but it still didn't completely jolt me awake.
My displacement pulled our queue apart and once we were separated Telisi became clear minded. She let out a call of alarm and swooped down to try to catch me. Fear and adrenaline should have rattled me awake but I was too tired to keep my eyes open. The last thing I remembered was Telisi finally managing to swoop under me, suspending me in air while trying to keep hold with her jaws.
I had pleasant dreams this time. I recalled my time in TAP, but not the time I spent under the careful eye of Mercer. My dreams were instead of the Serantu children, huddling in our bunks and humming the melody of the Na'vi song we knew. Aha'ri was alive in my dream, laughing along with the other children and thumbing our mother's songcord.
After dreaming of our childhood innocence I thought of the first time I came outside, when I escaped from the TAP compound. Every Na'vi bone in my body awakened, my soul crying for Eywa. The fragrant smell of the forest and the exuberant sounds of the wildlife were the most beautiful sounds I had ever heard.
I dreamed of climbing the rookery, lightheaded and full of excitement as I chased a coy Telisi higher into the sky. Eetu followed along, making sure I made it up while laughing at our antics. Her yellow eyes studied me as I neared her, carefully removing the vines from her jaws. We understood each other in that moment and I connected our queue, forever intertwining our destinies. And then our first flight, soaring through the sky. The sensation of cloud mist on my skin and the rush of air in my hair.
Last I dreamt of Eetu. When I first met him he was next to his fresh kill. I recalled how I thought he was charming, the way he smirked with confidence. He taught me to use a heavy bow, gifting me his, and watched with heated eyes as I shot the target. I glanced back, eager to impress him, and locked gazes with him. In that moment my heart was thudding so hard it reached my throat. He praised me and walked forward to correct my posture, giving me tips about drawing a heavy bow and how it was different from a Longbow. I could feel his body heat radiating to my back, his masculine scent covering me. Heat flushed to my cheeks and ears and I tried my best to hide it, shakily thanking him for the lesson.
It felt like I was asleep for years, and finally I cracked my eyes open. The evening sounds of Pandora filled my ears and I looked around groggily, realizing that the fauna was glowing in the darkness. It was night, a dangerous time to be alone and incapacitated. Gasping I sat up, patting the ground for my bow.
"Telisi!" I called, remembering what I had been doing last. I hoped my negligence didn't harm her. Soothing me, she crooned back, signaling she wasn't far away. Relaxing now that I knew she was okay and calm, I looked to the side to see that someone had started a fire and I was under a house-like root system that sheltered me.
"What happened…?" I murmured, rubbing my head. For the first time in weeks I had slept peacefully and my mind felt clear. It was nothing short of a miracle.
"You're awake!" Someone engaged me in Na'vi and I turned suddenly, gripping on to a rock in defense, but wilted when I realized it a familiar face.
Eetu was handsome as always. He had a lanky but muscular form and a firm, manly brow. In the dim lighting his bioluminescent freckle pattern sparkled like stars and his yellow-green eyes were sharp and vibrant.
He had a handful of sticks and dropped them by the fire before rushing to my side.
"Are you alright? Did you injure anything?" His large hands grasped my shoulders and my heartbeat echoed in my ears, his face just in front of mine.
"N-no. I feel fine." I flushed, my ears twitching nervously.
Relief gave way to irritation, and I could read the rapid shift of emotions on his face easily.
"Then what in Eywa were you thinking?" His fangs flashed as his lips curled, his brow furrowed and his ears down. "Do you know how dangerous it is to fly when you are tired? You could have hurt Telisi, and if she didn't act quickly you would have fallen all the way from the rookery. You could have died."
"I'm sorry." I blinked, realizing he was absolutely right. I could now vividly recall the peril I had been in. "But how did you know that's what happened?"
"Telisi showed me her memories. She was very worried about you." He clicked his tongue. "And just think of how I felt. You looked exhausted in her memories, and she barely managed to grab you when you fell. I nearly had a heart attack when she burst through the treeline with you in her jaws."
It was a reasonable enough explanation and I sheepishly apologized again, his vivid speech painting a detailed picture of just how upsetting my actions were.
"Why were you so tired?" His voice softened. The question was innocent, but I didn't know where to begin to explain it to him.
"I… have been having a hard time sleeping. I keep getting nightmares." I explained in a weak tone, hyper focusing on how he was still so close to me. Searching his face and mapping his markings and bioluminescent freckles in my memory, I had a hard time elaborating while I was so enchanted.
The proximity started to effect him as well and he deflated, all the anger leaving him. Emotion instead clouded his vision as he gazed at me, his pupils flickering as he studied me back. We were so close I could feel his breath on my skin, tickling me.
"You know… it occurred to me. When Telisi brought you to me unconscious… I couldn't even call your name. Everyone in my clan just called you Serantu."
"M-my name?" It was an absurd thing to ask. Usually a name would have been exchanged in first greetings but I hadn't heard my name in years. It was a foreign concept. So much so there was a long, heavy pause as I searched my memories.
"You don't have to tell me if you don't want to." Disappointment dipped his shoulders so I spoke up, my mind finally functioning enough to come up with the answer.
"No, it's not that. I was just shocked. My name hasn't been used in a long time. To the children at TAP I was 'sister'. To the humans I was 'you'. And to the Na'vi I am 'Serantu'. I haven't heard my name in many years. Probably since my sister died."
Tears stung at my vision, the mention of Aha'ri still a sore subject a great many years later.
"Then… can I have the honor of calling you by your name?" With a gentle hand he cupped my cheek, ready to wipe any tears that might escape.
"It's Mina'ri."
The moment I told him his lips stretched into a beautiful smile. I was so enamored with the sight that time slowed and I could only watch him, my heart pounding in my ears.
"It's a beautiful name." He announced. "Mina'ri."
"Don't do this again." The order was in a much more serious, deep tone. The shift between my name and his request was comical. I couldn't help but to laugh.
"I promise. I don't want to go through that again either. I can't imagine what would have happened if Telisi didn't catch me. And it was a stroke of brilliance to find you for help. I'll have to give her extra fish for it." A distance away I could hear her crooning and clicking with approval, glad for praise.
I cleared my throat, scooted away and stretched, getting the sleep out of my muscles. If I had allowed myself to stay near him I would have been content to stay like that forever.
"Ahhh! I haven't slept like that in forever. It must have been because you were nearby, Eetu. This is the first time in weeks I haven't had nightmares." I babbled it unconsciously but as soon as I mentioned it I knew it to be true. Eetu had a way of making me feel safe, comfortable, and protected. I knew he was strong, clever, and savvy. He was someone I could truly depend on in a fight, and someone who could easily provide for me if I was too injured to care for myself. And most importantly he was enjoyable to be around and conversing with him was easy and fun.
"Maybe the nightmares keep visiting you because you have lingering feelings. I can help you face them. Tell me what they are about." Sitting by the fire, he waved me over invitingly. His offer was appreciated but I was reluctant.
Eetu was very young during the first war and he likely didn't remember the atrocities of the humans. Yes, he had experienced loss with his Ikran and he knows what the RDA is doing now, but he likely isn't aware of the full extent of what happened. No one besides the Serantu and the Resistance truly knew what happened to my people, and even I only had flashes.
Teylan's words echoed in my mind, reminding me that I came to talk to Eetu. I needed him to know my past and to see if he would accept me as I was. Only then would I be able to accept these feelings… or move on from them.
I sat next to him at his provocation. He rustled in a gathering basket and pulled out a cut of Hexepede and some sage mushrooms. They looked of pretty excellent quality, which was unsurprising from such an excellent hunter.
"I figured you might be hungry." He grabbed some long sticks and tossed them at me. "Mind sharpening them while I cut this up?"
"I am hungry, actually. All I eat over at HQ is dry RDA rations. It does little to take the edge off for a Na'vi." I pulled my knife out of my belt and started to whittle the end of the sticks so it would be sharp enough to string the meat.
We sat in companionable silence for a while while I gathered my thoughts. He knew not to push me and quietly broke the roast into chunks, patiently waiting for me to decide to share.
"The Serantu didn't simply disappear." I started. "Growing up we were told that we were abandoned children that the humans graciously took in and that we should be grateful to them. We had no idea of the significance of our marks or what our clan was like."
"The Na'vi don't abandon our own." Eetu firmly stated as if he wanted to shake any doubts I had. I smiled at him and continued.
"I know. We always thought it odd. But we remembered little from our time before the humans. Some of us were so young that they didn't remember the Na'vi at all, like Teylan. Instead we were told that Eywa was not real and that we shouldn't sing, or have songcords. We lived being taught of human destruction and their ways and learned nothing of our people, and told that we were training to be ambassadors."
"… they told you Eywa was not real?" He paused in his cutting, horror on his expression. It was a concept no Na'vi had ever thought to question, simply because they were able to connect to Eywa with their queue. It was proof of her existence, and to deny her was to deny life.
"We had no Tree of Souls or Tarsyu Flowers to connect with. Only cold metal. There was no tales of our ancestors. It was as if our kuru was cut. There was no way to know Eywa so we were unsure and uneasy. Even still we were Na'vi. Some of us, like my sister Aha'ri, kept our culture close. She never believed we were abandoned and she always expressed doubt about the humans. She had all but convinced us to leave… but she…" I trailed away, my hands shaking.
"Why didn't you leave?" Eetu asked, his jaw set and grim. It was a prison he couldn't imagine, away from wood and leaves and enclosed with four straight metal calls. It was so small, built for humans, that once we grew beyond the size of a child we had to crouch in most rooms.
"We were told to be grateful to Mercer and the RDA, so some of us were afraid to defy them. My sister stood up and told them that we weren't humans and we weren't abandoned. We were Na'vi. She started to leave and… they killed her. Right in front of me. Mercer, who claimed to protect us, shot her down with their guns and made her an example."
"I'm sorry…" Eetu saw the pain on my face and wanted to cut me off, perhaps judging that I was getting too upset, but I continued.
"What he did was make her a martyr. The other children revered her bravery and took her teachings to heart. That was when I lost my name. Her actions were so great that the other children saw me and thought of her. The humans treated me worse than the others because they assumed I was just like my sister. It changed me. I realized she was right all along and I started to sneak peeks at documents left behind by Mercer and his group. We were not meant to be ambassadors for our people. Mercer had truly meant to use us for war. We were weapons to him, made to be able to trick the tribes into trusting us before we cut them down. But he found us disobedient. His next plan was to start a breeding program and steal our children so that he can raise them free of Na'vi influence from birth."
"He was going to steal your children?" Eetu dropped his knife, horrified.
"Yes. I knew it was a terrible place. We all did. I knew Mercer was lying to us. But he had already shown us that if we tried to leave we would die. So we all stayed put. Until Jake Sulley and his warriors waged war and pushed the humans out. Mercer could have released us but instead he ordered for all of us to die. Our teacher saved us and put us into a cryo sleep where we were lost for 16 years."
"That man has no honor." Picking up his knife again with a firm grip, he stared at the meat while he processed the information.
"If only I knew how right my sister was." Tears pushed forward and I grabbed a new stick. The whittling was proceeding slower than normal because of my tragic tale. "Ever since I have been free of the cold buildings of TAP and felt the warmth of the Na'vi, memories have awakened within me. Memories of growing up with my people. Some are warm, with music and laughter. But many are the memories of the night we were taken. I don't remember much other than suffering. It was complete genocide of the Serantu, I am sure of it. And when I dream I remember the blood and the screams. And sometimes, if I'm unlucky, I remember my sister's dying moments. And I wake up terrified and full of hatred."
"The Sky People know only how to destroy." Eetu gritted out. "Ma Mina'ri, I am so sorry. I shouldn't have asked you to share this."
"No." I smiled shakily, trying to will my body to calm down. "I wanted you to know about me. About why I fight. And why I can't sleep."
"You have been through a long trial. The humans will pay for their horrible actions." He was notably holding in his anger.
"But I feel peace around you, Eetu. Today I had only good dreams of happy memories. So thank you." I was so distracted, watching carefully to see his expressions, that I slipped. My knife slid off the stick and sliced into my finger.
"Ah! Shoot!" I hissed and dropped my blade, red blood welling up.
"Are you okay?!" Eetu abandoned his task instantly, rushing over to me with his brow furrowed in concern.
"It's just a little cut." I assured him, using my other hand to put pressure.
"I have some dapophet leaves in my pouch. Give me a minute." He rustled in the small pouch at his waist and I shook my head.
"There's no need to waste them. It's just a cut. I'll be fine."
"It's not a waste if it helps you heal faster." Finding two delicate leaves he had harvested from the very top of the plant, he carefully wrapped one around my finger, twisting it the ends so that it didn't fall off.
"Thank you." I whispered. I realized he was close again when I could feel his breath on my cheek. I looked up at him, my cheeks flushing pink. Despite our proximity I couldn't help but wonder what he thought of me. Was he full of pity now, seeing me as the broken person I was? Or did he truly accept me?
"Mina'ri." He mumbled. My name felt so sinful coming from his lips and I shuddered. He brought his hand up to my cheek, staring deeply into my eyes. At this distance I could see that his eyes had streaks of green in them that matched the lush forest around us.
"I see you." His confession took the air from my lungs. This wasn't a greeting. This was his way of telling me he saw my past and he accepted it. He knew I was anxious and he wanted to assure me it was okay.
The tears I had been holding spilled over.
"Oh." I tried to wipe at my cheeks but he was already brushing them away.
"Mina'ri…" His voice was deep and full of emotion. I had only heard it so rich when he was talking at Zomey's memorial. It caught my attention and I waited with bated breath and tears streaming down for his next sentence.
"It might not be the right time, but I feel like I'll suffocate if I don't tell you right now."
"You can tell me anything." I assured him in a little voice.
"I feel like it was Eywa's will to meet you. You came to me when I needed it the most, and you were the only person I wanted to share my pain with. You have such a gentle nature. Of course, you can be fierce when you need to be, but you appreciate everything around you down to every flower and you have a way of bringing people together that few possess. I think you are beautiful. Not only your soft features, but your soul and your mind."
His confession stole my breath and I could only put my hand over his and smile, tears still stinging my eyes as he finished.
"You are my safe place." He finished, spurred by my positive expression. "When I am with you I am at peace. And I want to be that for you."
"You are that for me already." I assured him, sniffling. "At the end of the day I only want to be by your side."
"I wan't able to protect Zomey, but I swear to Eywa that I will protect you. I could never live with myself if I let you get hurt." It was an unspoken promise to join my fight, and I shook my head.
"No. Eetu, you are a prized hunter of the Aranahe. They will never allow you to leave to follow me." Everytime I visited their Hometree I heard the people speak of him and how they admired him and how they trusted him. He had built up such a culture of respect and a rapport that I couldn't bear to tear him away.
"I learned to hunt so that I could provide for my loved ones." Firmly rejecting my refusal, he set his jaw.
"But I can't take you away from them. And I cannot join your clan. I am one of the last of the Serantu and I have a responsibility to help build back what was taken. The Na'vi need us to spread stories and wisdom and to act as a diplomat. There is too few of us to allow me to abandon our destiny."
It was true. The burden of my dying clan rested on the shoulders of just four survivors. I had no option but to do my duty.
"And how will you rebuild without children? Ka'nat will allow me to leave with you. He knows how important the Serantu are and that you will need to continue your clan with more generations. I want that with you." He held my hands in his, his eyes earnestly seeking mine. "I will stay with you. I will help you rebuild. I will be your strength and I will be your family. You only need to accept me."
"… are you sure Ka'nat will agree?" I replied sheepishly. He had been difficult for me to convince to fight the RDA and I still felt he held almost no fond feelings towards me. In fact he had almost ordered me killed when Etuwa was injured.
"You care too much about everyone else, though that is what I like about you. This isn't about Ka'nat or the Aranahe, it's about us. If we are mated before Eywa, how could anyone deny us?" Eetu kept my gaze, strong and unwavering. His confidence built in me.
"Alright." I felt blood rush to my cheeks, turning my blue complexion lavender. "I-if you are fine with me… I would like nothing more."
His hand swept under my braid to cradle my neck and he pulled me closer, the corners of his mouth quirking into a smile. Our lips brushed and I leaned in, reveling in the electrifying feeling. It amazed me how a tiny brush of our skin could affect me so deeply.
"Then let us go." He grabbed my hand and started to run, the action startling me and causing me to clumsily stumble behind him.
"Telisi!" He called behind us. "Feel free to clean up what we didn't eat!"
"Go where?" I asked, getting into a rhythm with my feet to keep pace.
"To see Eywa." His words were so clean it almost didn't register. I had no idea where we actually were since I was brought to this location, so I blindly followed. I had to break our connection so that I could traverse the forest with ease. It was beautiful at night, the forest glowing with subtle bioluminescence in all colors. Woodsprites floated around joyfully and fan lizards spun around, creating layers to the dense biome we traveled through.
It didn't take long for us to reach our destination, and Eetu leapt upwards to scale the side of a cliff. I was perfectly able to do so as well, but he turned and offered his hand to me. I blinked at it, confused by the gesture, but took it. Because of his lean, hunting honed muscles he easily hefted me up to side. I gasped as our bodies neared and suddenly it felt like I wasn't wearing enough clothing. Usually Na'vi clothes were comfortable and easy to move in, but in this moment it meant there was a vast expanse of skin available to push against him and fog my mind.
"Eetu…" I whispered his name, my mouth just inches from his as his hand rested on my waist. The two of us were pressed against the cliff face with little room to maneuver so every shift of his body was felt by me.
"Just a little further." He assured me, smirking in his devastating way. Dragging himself away he climbed higher, sure to wait for me to catch up. I scrambled behind him, still flustered. Because my mind was on other things I slipped on the last step and he grabbed my arm, pulling me to safety. Again I was close to him. So close our lips almost touched and I couldn't help but tilt closer, pulled to him.
"Come." He stepped backwards and I followed him. I was so absorbed in him that I didn't even notice that we were surrounded by a soft pink glow. It took one long tendril of the Tree of Souls sliding across my forehead to knock me out of my stupor.
"Oh!" I blinked and looked around, seeing the beauty of the sacred ground. "Were we this close?"
"Even Eywa agrees to our bonding." Eetu assured me, using the proximity to imply fate was at work. I was still uneasy.
"The Serantu never stay in one place. If you were to be with me you would not have a home. Instead we would be nomadic and travel between all the clans. Is this truly what you wish for?" My lack of confidence only made him smile with his cocky grin.
"Skxawng." I blinked at the unexpected use of the word 'moron' and his eyes curved fondly at me. "Have you not felt my sincerity? I will follow you. We will go to the Upper Plains, to the Clouded Forest, and even to the Valley of Origins. We could even go to the ocean clans. My home will be where you are."
"Then I have no more complaints." I smiled, holding my arms wide in invitation. He came to me, wrapping his strong arms around my shoulders and holding me close to hid body. Surrounded by his scent, I knew this was the path I was meant to take. He had shaken all of my inhibitions and convinced me to trust him.
Just by pressing our bodies together we shared warmth and fiery desire. He looked at me deeply with his yellow eyes, staring into my soul.
"I've never seen eyes your color before." He admitted, running his thumb gently along my eyebrow. "It was the first thing that truly captivated me about you. The blue-grey is such a gentle color."
"I was told by my sister that we had Ta'unui and Tayrangi blood, but I don't know if that's true. This color is much more common in the reefs. Aha'ri and I were the only Serantu children at TAP with this eye color." My gaze darted away, shy and self conscious. It was disconcerting to be different.
"No matter where they came form, they are beautiful. They remind me of calm waters." Blood rushed to my face, coloring my skin purple again. He put his finger under my chin to redirect my attention back to him.
"When you blush your Serantu mark turns brighter." It didn't help to calm me.
"Eetu!" I complained, covering my face. His name sobered him and his smile fell. Every instinct in my body told me that he liked the way I said his name, his eyes watching me as if I were prey.
Wordlessly he grabbed the end of his braid and held up his queue. There was no pressure or coaxing. He wanted for me to make the choice. My hands were trembling but I had no reason to deny him. I grabbed my braid as well and touched the queues together, the neuron strings weaving.
Instantly I felt how he felt. His heart was pounding just like mine and his body was hot and restless. I knew how much he longed for me and it only sent my own need higher. Under that intense desire there was affection. The warmth one felt when they saw something they liked lingered with the antsy feeling of lust.
My doubts were gone. He loved me as much as I loved him. Again we locked eyes. And we understood one another. Impatience built and in an instant we were entangled.
Before Eywa we were mated, and now no one could refute our bond. I slept again, full of peace and happiness, and we remained connected until the sun pulled above the horizon and formed a soft glow of morning across the sacred ground.
Forming the bond with another Na'vi is a strange thing. If Eywa disliked the matching or thought it would end in ruin she would make it unpleasant to stop the relationship, but our bonding just as intimate as I had been told it would be. And instead of the connection that one would have with a beast, which focused on guidance, it was a deep connection of shared memory.
Eetu likely saw many of the same memories I had dreamt of after falling from Telisi. I also saw his memories, and Eywa always shared the happy ones.
It gave me such a deep understanding on the life of the Na'vi. I saw how he interacted with other children growing up and precious moments with his family where his mother showed him how to read a songcord or his father showed him how to use a bow. I saw the moment he met Zomey, wrestling with her high in the floating mountains. He flew free with her in the sky, dipping low to the water so she could snack on fish.
And I saw me. It was strange to see through his eyes. The moment we met was special to Eetu as well, and I looked at my face as I nervously engaged with him, telling him Nefika sent me. He walked behind me to adjust my posture and I blushed, my ears twitching as my blue eyes darted his way.
Next was when I was sent by Kayi to find him, still grieving over his lost Ikran. When I approached he was startled but happy to see me. He called me 'Eylanay', which meant an aquaintance you wanted to know better. I saw how I looked to him, this time drenched in rain with the water droplets cascading down my face and over my bare midriff and legs. I didn't know that I could be attractive, but in his eyes I looked lovely, water drops sparkling in my black hair and eyelashes. He had been lonely, but upon seeing me he felt warm. I greeted him with a gentle smile when he asked why I was there.
"Looking for you." I said. I had no idea until I saw it from his side that that moment was impactful. Deep in his chest, where his heart had felt only sorrow, it moved for me.
Another moment of us together, when he put Zomey to rest. This time he greeted me as 'friend' and I crinkled my nose when I smiled widely back at him. My presence was a comfort, and he told me as much.
"Anything for you and Zomey." I replied to him, and his heart quickened. I handed him the Fortune's Fruit he asked for and he told me how he would use it.
"I don't know what to say." Doubt creeped in as he stared at the fruit.
"Say what's in your heart." He looked up at me, and the way the sunlight framed me in his eyes made me seem warm. I put my hand over his and smiled with kindness and his heart bloomed in his chest in response, his hand tingling.
I was with him, and when he turned from his eulogy he stared at me for a long while. My brows were bowed with sympathy and it appeared like I was holding back tears for him, my lips curved in a smile. Even I hadn't known I was making that expression, and it was softened by the evening glow of the sun.
"I'm so glad I could be here to remember Zomey with you." I said, my voice tight with tears. Again, though his heart had been leaden with grief for his Ikran my words lifted it, putting a thick pulse in his chest.
After this I saw a collage of memories. Every time I came to see him was recalled, be it a brief chat or when I asked to hunt beside him, he remembered the moments preciously. I had spent much time with him and I didn't even realize it until it was all laid out. Our laughter, our teasing, our heated looks. Sometimes we would make idle talk by the fire, the flames dancing and casting shadows on my face while my freckles glowed in the dim night.
The last memory I saw wasn't a good one, much to my surprise. I could only reason that Eywa wanted me to see it, which is why she shared.
It was when Telisi came dragging my body through the brush, startling Eetu who was out hunting. His heart sank, my body limp in her jaws. Fear that he would feel loss again settled in his belly as he rushed forward, taking me from her.
Telisi squawked in alarm.
"What's wrong with her?" Eetu asked, running his hand over my body to look for injuries. He saw none and became confused.
"Friend!" He patted at my cheek and my head lolled to the side, my body lifeless. "Damn it, I don't even know her name to call to her."
Regret caused bile to build in his throat.
"What was I doing this whole time? I don't even know her name." Eetu held me closer to his body.
Telisi waved her wings to get his attention, crying out, and turned her head to reveal one of her queue. He stared at her, unsure of what she wanted, but Telisi didn't move.
"Do you want me to look into your memory?" He asked, finally understanding. Because she had already bonded with me, tsahelyu would not change her loyalty. But it would allow Telisi to share her experiences. Understanding his meaning she bobbed her head and cooed, inviting him to try.
Unsure he held his braid up to her queue and they connected.
My face came into view, seen through Telisi's eyes. I looked terrible, my cheeks sunken and dark bags under my eyes. Still I smiled and patted her muzzle.
"It's good to see you today, Telisi." Concern made her cry out, and I shook my head. "I'm okay, I just want you to help me find Eetu."
The memory fizzled, Telisi jumping forward to our chaotic flight. Her vision was flickering, blurring and doubling. She was confused. Climbing upwards, tsahelyu was suddenly broken and she whipped around. My body fell from the air, my eyes barely open. I was set to collide with a floating rock when Telisi panicked, swooping to catch me. I almost fell off her back again so she grabbed me in her jaws.
It was impossible to fly while she was trying to balance me so she chaotically descended, barely able to avoid obsticles. The leaves of a Fortune Leaf Cane slowed our fall and we managed to reach the forest floor without getting injured. She released me to toss her head in the air and sniff, searching for Eetu's scent. It took a while of Telisi hauling me through the forest and smelling the air to finally catch his trail.
Eetu disconnected from her, realizing what had happened, and he cupped my cheek with shaking hands. The image of my body falling through the sky was burned into his memory.
"Thank you, Telisi." He made sure to give the Ikran praise but didn't tear his eyes from my sleeping face, my eyelids flickering as I dreamt.
"Why did you fly in that condition?" He murmured. "I almost lost you."
The last thing I saw before waking up was his vision fogging with emotion and a tear hitting my cheek and rolling down to my lips.
I was emotional as well, keenly affected by his thoughts and memories. He sensed I was awake and stirred as well, opening his yellow-green eyes and meeting my gaze.
"Ma Mina'ri." He laughed, reaching out to wipe at my face. "Why do you cry?"
"I'm sorry." I sniffled, feeling guilty. "I won't fly Telisi when I'm tired again. I didn't know you were that upset."
"That's a strange memory for Eywa to share." He lamented. "I only saw your happy ones. Though I was in many of them."
His teasing brought blood to my cheeks, my blush reaching my ears.
"Eetu…!" I complained, covering my face. As I rolled away our queues broke apart. A sense of loss came over me and I wondered if I would be able to function without him. It was the bond of a lifetime that only those mated before Eywa could experience.
"She probably showed you how upset I was so you won't ever do it again. I'm not sure I could handle losing you after what happened to Zomey." Eetu sat up and dusted himself off, looking for his armor that we had discarded the night before. I realized at this moment that I was still bare and scrambled to find my own clothing, clumsily slipping it on. As soon as I managed to put my headpiece on he came up behind me, wrapping his arms around my body so he could hold me close and nuzzle his face into the crook of my neck.
"What should we do now?" He asked, the hint of suggestion in his tone. My stomach growled in response.
"I'm so hungry." I admitted, recalling how we skipped dinner to come to the tree.
"Then let us head back to Hometree. Perhaps Reylun will have some food to give us. And we can break the news to Ka'nat and Etuwa." I could feel the way his lips stretched to a smile against my ear, his breath tickling my skin.
"Oh… goodie." My mood fell as I imagined trying to explain it to the Olo'eyktan.
"Do not worry. I will be with you." His assurance was enough to calm my nerves. "But first let us connect to the spirit tree. I want Eywa to always remember that we are mated."
The way the tree of voices worked was just as he insinuated. It kept our memories safe, but it only retains what we have uploaded onto it. No Na'vi in Eywa remembered their death because it wasn't a memory that was recorded. If anything happened to me before I connected with a tree or a Tarsyu Flower I would not know of my bond with Eetu even in Eywa.
"Alright."
Once back at Hometree I found we were blessed with our timing. Reylun was just pulling out one of his special pastries. I gratefully ate it, shoving playful bites at Eetu between my own. Careful eyes watched us and understanding lit Reylun's eyes. The older Na'vi was quick witted so he spotted our bond without difficulty, but he kept his mouth shut. There was no merit to sharing news that was not his own.
Once full I thanked the chef and then nervously idled at the bottom of the ramp that led up the center of the tree towards the meeting room.
"Come on, then." Eetu grabbed my hand. I locked my legs, refusing to take a step.
"I'm scared." I hissed, nervously glancing upwards.
"Look at the mighty Serantu, afraid to speak. No one would believe it." His teasing was irritating, but the smirk he accompanied with it was very enticing. I frowned, upset that he was so handsome.
"He doesn't like me!" I insisted.
"Putting it off will not help us." Eetu knew how to deal with Ka'nat and he hated secrets the most. "If you don't come willingly I'll pick you up and carry you. Imagine the scene that will make!"
It was more of a promise than a threat and I frowned at him, imagining the scandalized Aranahe gossiping about us as he carried me up the tree like a baby.
"Alright." I grumbled, finally dragging my feet. "Let's go."
When we reached the meeting chamber where the leader usually was I paused, but he had already noticed me.
"Ah. Serantu. Do you come with news of the Sky People?" The Aranahe were officially assisting the Resistance to fight the RDA so it was a valid assumption.
"… not exactly. It's a more personal matter." When I nervously slid into view he saw Eetu by my side and frowned.
"I did hear that the two of you have been spending a lot of time together lately. I hope you aren't thinking to ask for permission to bond." His eyes narrowed and I swallowed heavily.
"We don't really need permission anymore…" I assured him. As usual my attempts to soothe him did the opposite since he possessed a personality I had trouble with. He easily understood the hidden meaning of my words and fury flashed in his expression.
"The purpose of the Serantu is to travel and give joy and knowledge. Since you have come to Hometree you have done nothing but take. Now you have taken one of our best hunters?" It was a scolding I expected but I still flinched, my ears pressing back. Eetu glanced at my unease and took a step forward, shielding me with a strong arm.
"This was my idea so please don't shame her."
"And you didn't think to speak to your Olo'eyktan about mating with a woman from another tribe? If it were anyone else I would banish them!" The leader slammed his fist into the side wall and I jumped.
"I have completed my Iknimaya and finished my Dream Hunt. I am allowed to mate with a woman of my choosing. I had no woman who had ever caught my eye, so I lived alone. But my rights are still valid. I chose Mina'ri to be my mate and was blessed by Eywa." He stood his ground against the grouchy old man, and I admired him for his fortitude. I was at a loss. Though I felt like I had done nothing wrong I still felt anxious.
"You are allowed to mate with one of the People! She is an outsider!" Ka'nat's harsh words hit me and I trembled, gripping on to the hanging sash on the back of Eetu's waist garb. I knew what he meant. It would be less hurtful if he was concerned about my origins from another clan, but he was referring to my upbringing. I was an outsider because I was raised by humans.
"She is one of the People! In what way is she lacking?" Eetu was getting worked up and I reached out to grasp his hand. He glanced back at me and softened at my upset expression. The last thing I wanted was for Eetu to disrespect his Olo'eyktan.
"Father, perhaps you are being too harsh to them." Etuwa had been fetched by one of the guards and the Tsahik strode into the room. "Without the Serantu I would be dead. She is a warrior unlike any we have in our clan of weavers. And without her our very home would be destroyed by the Kinglor. They love her, and they have trusted her enough to find new homes to revitalize our forest."
"She brings war!" The scars from Ka'nat's past came to the surface, laden with grief for his dead wife.
"No, she brings peace. Only those willing to stand up to injustice can stop it. Is that not why you have chosen to join her?" The wise words of the Tsahik cowed her father and he paused, pondering her point.
"Is it not an honor for one of the Aranahe to be chosen by the Serantu?" She didn't let up, continuing to give him a barrage of reasons as to why he should ease his temper. "Eywa sanctioned their match, and now one of our own has an important mission to help rebuild a clan that was hunted to near extinction. We need the Serantu. They bond us together with other clans and bring stories and laughter, as well as important news and knowledge. What Eetu has done is the first step in bringing them back."
Once again I was amazed at the effect that Etuwa could have on her father. I peeked from behind Eetu and gave her a grateful grin. She nodded back.
"… you're right, my daughter." Ka'nat sighed, giving in. "Eetu, wherever you wish to go, the Aranahe will always accept you home. If you wish to fly with her, and if you are ready, you may choose to ascend the rookery again and choose another Ikran."
The complicated look on Eetu's face drew my attention and I put my hand on his back. It must have made him think of Zomey.
"Thank you, Ka'nat." He finally nodded in appreciation.
"And you." the Olo'eyktan focused on me and I stiffened, prepared for any curveball he might send at me.
"While the Serantu were nomadic, they also settled for periods of time. Before they disappeared, members would often stay with a clan for at least one rotation. You must promise me that you will bring Eetu back to stay every so often. All Na'vi long for their home."
It was a reasonable demand, and I nodded. Ka'nat's expression softened.
"You must stay as well. The Aranahe will not forget that we were the first to find the Serantu again, and we do not skirt our responsibilities. With Eetu at your side, you are now Aranahe was well as Serantu."
It was the most friendly speech I had ever received from the man and I nodded quickly, hoping he wouldn't have a change of heart.
"I have something for you." Etuwa smiled and rummaged through her pouch before holding out her hand. I gratefully received the offering and realized they were beads. "For your songcord. There are few events more worthy of a bead than finding your mate."
I couldn't help but roll the bead through my fingers, inspecting every little detail. It had two ropes twisted together around the center, a clear depiction of a paring.
"Then we won't take more of your time." Eetu grabbed my hand, and led the way out of the room. I chased along behind him, waving my goodbyes to Etuwa.
"What's the rush?" I asked him when we were out of earshot, curious about his sudden exit.
"It occurred to me that you already met everyone important to me, but I have never met your family. In you memories I saw the other Serantu children, but also a Na'vi man named So'lek. I thought it might be a good time to go to this Resistance HQ and introduce myself." When he mentioned So'lek his ears twitched and he glanced away from me.
"So'lek? Did you see memories with him? I've barely had time to spend with him." I tried to go back in my thoughts and consider what he might be referring to. Perhaps when he rescued us from cryo and greeted me in the Na'vi way. His 'I see you' made it feel like I could breath again because I knew that I would no longer have to deny myself. But I couldn't think of any instance that would make Eetu uneasy.
"Really? Because it seemed like he made you a songcord, especially for you." He still didn't make eye contact and instead continued our walk out of Hometree.
"I'm not sure it was just for me. He could have done the same for the others." As I said it I remembered that he likely only went out of his way for me. So'lek was a bit of a loner and he only paid me special attention because I had stepped up and fought to save him. There was a line of respect between us but I never felt like we crossed it. Though the moment he gave me the songcord was emotionally dense and I couldn't deny that.
"It didn't seem like that to me." The dip in his voice was cute, and I could tell that he was pouting. It was a new side to Eetu that I found really endearing.
"I'm sure there is no way that he could even feel that way about me. So'lek is twice my age." It was strange to think about, but So'lek and I were actually born around the same time frame. The only difference is while I was in cryo, suspended in time, So'lek was hiding in the forest and becoming more lethal and less social. It gave him a good 16 years on me, which is a wide age gap for any sort of romance.
"You don't seem to understand how charming you are." Exasperated he began to direct me through the foliage in the direction of the human resistance. His compliment was unexpected and I could only do as he wished, following obediently behind him. As we grew closer I felt an interesting anxiety.
I wasn't ashamed of Eetu by any means but I did fear how my fellow Serantu would take my mating. I also wasn't sure how Eety would interact with the humans stationed there, or even if anyone would approve of my relationship when we were in the midst of a war.
The steel sides of the building came into view and I completely tensed up. If I were to be honest I didn't like the place in the slightest. The human structures reminded me too much of TAP.
"Are you okay?" Noticing my body language, Eetu stopped to check on me. But we were already spotted.
"Hey, sister. Are you back?" Teylan popped his head out of the cave hideout and smiled widely, his fangs sparkling. I felt all the tension ease from my body, happy to see him.
"Teylan." I smiled and trodded over to him, ready to give him a noogie through his hat. My lover followed along beside me, mouthing Teylan's name and drawing conclusions with the shared memories.
"Is this the hunter you were talking about?" Teylan glanced to my company and Eetu grinned, more than happy to meet some of my clan.
" Eylanay, I see you." He gestured with his hand, touching his forehead and sweeping it away. Teylan looked absolutely delighted.
"It's nice to meet you as well." Teylan grinned, holding his hand out to shake. It was a completely different greeting than Eetu was used to but he still gripped on and pumped their hands up and down.
"I take it your talk when well?" Teylan glanced to me with hopeful sparkling eyes.
"I would not have had any confidence to go see Eetu without you." I gave credit where it was due and my mate realized how significant Teylan was, his eyes widening with appreciation.
"Now we are bonded under Eywa." I announced. It was easy to say to Teylin. He was simple to talk to.
"Really? The Na'vi way? I'm happy for you." Teylan's smile was lonely, but his words were genuine.
"Where is everyone else?" I looked around, half expecting Nor or Ri'nela to pop out.
"Nor and Ri'nela are over by the fire again, moping away from the humans. So'lek is inside by the fletching station, as usual. Alex is up in the research station, and Priya is by the monitors monitoring pollution levels. Not sure about Alma, though."
Alma's name made me sick to my stomach, my weird suspicions swirling in my brain, but I chose to ignore it.
"Thanks, Teylan. I wanted to check out any bowstring mods So'lek had to trade. I have a few duty rosters he might be interested in." It was not untrue. In my insomniac crazed state I razed quite a few RDA mining facilities and they always left critical data behind.
As we walked away Eetu came close to me, nervous about the strange building.
"I've never seen a Na'vi like him." He admitted. "He was dressed just like a Sky Person."
"Teylan… is special." I admitted. "He doesn't remember anything about our time before we were taken. He is very naive and innocent and believed the lies of the humans. I think he thought of Mercer like a father figure. No matter what sort of Na'vi clothing I try to give him, he claims he doesn't feel comfortable in them."
"Really?" Eetu frowned, his brow furrowing in confusion as if he had just discovered a rare species.
"He's still the sweetest person I have ever met. He just has some unique quirks." We walked into the decompression chamber, waiting to be cleared for the next door. The change in the air made my head feel loopy. Human air had a higher oxygen content, and if we were planning to stay longer I would make sure to get a CO2 canister to take a breath of here and there, but I was secretly hoping to keep the visit short.
"What sort of unique quirks?" Eetu asked, looking uneasy as the oxygen rich air hit him.
"He likes to tinker with human technology. The more complicated the better." My explanation just confused him further.
"But haven't you been trying to destroy human technology on Eywa? It doesn't seem like a very useful skill."
The door opened.
"It makes him happy so I just let him be." I strode inside confidently and people immediately started to scatter, spying a new Na'vi face. Most of the Na'vi that have come have showed open hostility to the humans here so they were quick to retreat. Eetu didn't seem to much mind and walked beside me with indifference.
Knowing the goal, and eager to get out of the compact space, I strode to the fletching station. So'lek was there carving a bow handle. He would pause every few seconds to grip it and check how his fingers fit.
"So'lek." I called his name and crouched by him, inspecting his work.
"You have come, 'eylan." So'lek stopped and twirled the blade around his finger before sheathing it. "How is the hunt?"
"It's going well. I have about 4 duty rosters to hand over. You have any good bowstrings I can trade for? Mine is getting a bit frayed." My request was simple and he nodded and pulled out a new one he had made.
"I tweaked the elasticity of this string so it will launch the arrows faster. It should easily pierce the glass on those sky people machines." I knew he was talking about the AMP suits. I took the string and tugged on it in my hands, shocked that it did have a different feel. Happy with it, I transferred the digital rosters to his tablet.
"But we have been all business." So'lek's eyes darted behind me, likely at Eetu. I followed his gaze to see that guest was impatiently shuffling on his feet, wishing to be introduced.
"Oh. I got so excited to get these lists out of my pouch I forgot my purpose in coming." I smiled at Eetu apologetically before continuing. "He wanted to meet you."
"Meet me? It's been a while since a Na'vi has come to see me." So'lek stood up and tapped his hand to his forehead. "I see you, brother. I am So'lek."
"I see you. I am Eetu, Mina'ri's mate." He did the greeting back to be polite, but added the last part with a smirk.
"Mate?" So'lek blinked before looking back to me. "You chose a mate?"
"It worked out that way." I admitted with a shy smile.
"He's Aranahe, yes? That old Ka'nat allowed this?" Surprise raised his brow. Before I came Ka'nat refused all of So'lek's attempts to recruit the clan for the Resistance.
"He gave us his blessings." Eetu assured So'lek, and I winced at his selective statement. It was touch and go and Ka'nat had barely relented with the help of Etuwa. But I suppose he did in the end give blessings.
"Do you have time for this?" It appeared that So'lek was less than pleased by my news. "You are irreplaceable in our operations. It's not the time for you to settle down and play house."
"I'm not going to stop fighting just because I am mated." I sighed.
"I will fight alongside her." The announcement took me off guard and I stared at Eetu. It had been briefly discussed but he now spoke it with such conviction.
"It's easy to make such claims, but she is the best fighter here. If you don't know how to fight the Sky People you will just drag her down." I could tell by the deepness of So'lek's voice that he was angry. I stepped in, my hands up to diffuse the situation.
"Eetu has fought with the Sky People before, and he is the best hunter of the Aranahe. He will be fine." I said the words as assurance and So'lek looked at me before deflating, completely slain by my defense of him.
"Why would your mate want to find me?" He grumpily added, taking his knife out to continue carving.
"Curiosity." I assured him. "When we shared memories he saw you. I had happy memories with you."
"Happy memories with me?" So'lek paused, his ears twitching.
"Yes. Look!" I untied my songcord from my belt and held it up for him to see. "Look at how many beads my songcord has now!"
He looked at the string and smiled.
"I was so happy when you gave this to me. It felt like I was finally becoming one of the People." I clutched it in my hand. "I had the confidence to move forward and earn more beads, and now it can make a true song."
"Don't get ahead of yourself." So'lek chuckled and ruffled my hair. "Wait until we finally end this war and make the Sky People leave for good. You and I will have to design a whole new bead to commemorate the occasion."
"I look forward to it." I offered him a warm smile and he grinned back, a rare sight, before standing at his full height and facing my mate.
"Eetu, was it?" He was serious again, ever the intimidating presence. Eetu nodded and So'lek paused, gathering his thoughts.
"The Serantu have been through atrocities that you can only imagine. Even I, who has lost his whole clan, can't understand the agony of being imprisoned by the Sky People and told that I was abandoned by my people. In those metal walls they couldn't even feel Eywa and weren't allowed our clothes or our traditions. Since Eywa has approved your union I have no grounds to object, but you must be sure to do right by her. Despite her suffering she shines brightly to those that fight for our land. Be worthy."
The speech was touching and unexpected so I teared up. I couldn't look their way or I might actually cry so I turned my head, my ears twitching.
"I will be." Eetu promised firmly, nodding again.
"I have much to do now that you have brought me more rosters." So'lek changed the subject.
"Are you leaving now? You won't stay for dinner? I learned a new recipe from the Zeswa I thought you might like." My shoulders slumped with disappointment. My time with So'lek always felt brief.
"I have things to think over, 'eylan." His expression was softer than I was used to, almost wistful. "I am at peace in the forest."
"Alright." I sighed and rummaged in my pouch, searching for the food I had cooked up. I found the crunchy stir fry I had made. It was a blend of fire seed and cloud seed with some spice I had purchased at the Zeswa camp. I handed it to him, knowing that the seeds would be a good snack while running about. I also knew So'lek was partial to spicy and crunchy food.
"Thank you." He put it in his own pouch, and touched his forehead in goodbye before disappearing.
"… he was an interesting man." Eetu broke the silence, noting my worried face. "But he will be fine."
"How can you be so sure?" I stuck my lip out in a concerned pout. "I've never seen him act like that before."
"I think he liked you more than you let on." Once more he dropped his suspicion and I furrowed my brow, disliking his analysis.
"Doubtful. Anyways, as So'lek said, I can't feel anything in these metal walls. I hope you don't mind that we skip meeting the humans. We can escape to the campfire spot under the building. I bet Nor and Ri'nela are still there. They hardly come inside if they can help it." The suggestion was more for him than me. I could tell he was feeling edgy, his stance shifting from foot to foot as if ready to bolt at any moment.
"I agree about the building. The air is too light." I found his description cute and couldn't help but to grab his hand to lead him out.
"Leaving already?" Priya skittered up to us and intercepted our path. "I was waiting. I mean, I was working. But I was hoping you would tell me who the heck that is."
Next to Eetu, Priya was comically small. He stared down at her in confusion. Not only was he not fluent in English, but Priya had a quirky way of speaking on her own.
"This is Eetu." I explained in English. "He's my… husband."
The word was foreign to me. In Na'vi we called marriage 'muntxa' which meant 'to mate with'. But in English referring to Eetu as 'mate' sounded strange. Almost like an innuendo.
"Husband?" Eetu repeated, his eyes twinkling. It was apparent that he liked the word, probably understanding what it meant by context clues.
"Husband? Are you kidding me?" Priya stared at him wide-eyed. "Well, hell. Even you kids are getting hitched and I'm stuck reading quadratic formulas all day and spying on radio chatter. It's a good thing I left my mother on Earth or I would never hear the end of it."
I tried to understand her meaning, tilting my head as I processed.
"I'm not kidding." I added, just to be sure. It was hard to tell with Priya what was rhetorical and not.
"I mean, congratulations. I don't have to buy you a wedding gift or anything right? Do you have a registry? What am I saying, of course you don't. But like… maybe a written list? On… leaves?" Her rambling always took my off guard and I tried to decipher it.
"We don't accept gifts for our marriage." I assured her, holding my hands up in surrender. Hell, we didn't even have written word.
"I'm… gonna shut up now." Priya laughed nervously. "You probably wanna do… newlywed stuff. Oh! Oh. Awkward. I didn't mean that sort of newlywed stuff… I meant… uh… you know what, It was nice to see you come by. And it was nice to meet hubby over there."
"Bye!" I waved to her and pulled Eetu into the compression chamber, heaving a breath of relief.
"That woman was weird." Eetu concluded with his limited knowledge of what we talked about.
"She can be a handful. But she means well." I agreed, waiting patiently for the air to go back to normal. Finally it had substance again, sticking to my lungs and ribs as I breathed in.
Once the doors opened I felt relief. The forest called to me and the sounds of the jungle was home. I hated the closed walls of human buildings and much preferred to sleep under the stars.
We made our way under the building to the sizable cavern underneath. Just as Teylan had said there was a fire going, but Ri'nela and Nor were nowhere to be seen. Perhaps they heeded the call of the forest as well.
"They're not here." I frowned, unsure of what to do. Eetu had wanted to meet the other Serantu. I considered if I should try to follow the scent of wood smoke that had soaked into their clothing, but Eetu plopped down on the ground next to the fire and patted the seat beside him in invitation.
"Come, yawne. We can wait to see if they'll return."
It was a suggestion I couldn't refuse. Being alone with Eetu was comfortable, and I sat down with a sigh, leaning into his side.
"You met So'lek at least, which was your main goal." I stared at him, wondering his thoughts on the mysterious Na'vi.
"And I'm glad I did! He definitely had feelings for you." The self satisfied smirk he wore irked me and I let out a huge, frustrated sigh.
"He does not. We have been through a lot together, fighting side by side. We have a bond, but it's not what you think."
"We will have to remain conflicted on this point." He shrugged. "It doesn't matter, really. We are already mated, and he knows it is a bond that is only allowed once. Regardless of if I am right or not he will have to come to terms with that."
"… if I didn't find your jealousy so sweet it would be really annoying." I let out a laugh and leaned into him, enjoying his warmth and his scent. We sat in companionable silence for a long while before Eetu finally spoke.
"Being here at the base of the Resistance really reminded me that at war. It was sobering. I had been riding the high of our mating and momentarily allowed myself to forget." Eetu's grip tightened on me and I stared up at him, listening patiently.
"If we were a normal couple that mated at a time where there was peace things would be different. Often the pair doesn't return for weeks; they will go someplace that they are alone and deepen the bond. But we can't do that, can we?" His smile turned sad, and I rubbed his back in small circles to soothe him.
"We will have to revisit that thought later. Nothing sounds more appealing than spending time away from the world, just you and I. Let's make it our goal once this is all over. Like a reward."
He liked my suggestion and this time his white teeth appeared in his smile.
For a while we sat together and my mind wandered away, my eyes captivated by the flames of the bonfire.
"What are you thinking about?" He asked, scooting behind me and wrapping his long, lean arms around my shoulders. He was quite a bit taller than I was and he easily tucked my head into the crook of his neck. Because I was actually pretty petite for a Na'vi he was able to encompass me well. His body against my back was soothing and as comforting as the flames, and his masculine smell drowned out the ash and smoke from the fire. I took in a deep, grounding breath, my thumb rubbing circles on his wrist bone.
"I was thinking… that I was reluctant to bring you here." As I admitted it a darkness churned in my gut, and I knew once more Eetu was about to open my innermost feelings.
"Did you not want to introduce me to your friends? I can't be that bad." The levity in his voice cued me into his teasing, but I could tell by the way his shoulders tensed that he was worried about my response.
"Nothing like that. I just didn't want to show you this part of me. I actually hate it here, with the metal and the smell of oil and grease. The unmoving, cold walls and dizzy air make me cagey." I had stopped rubbing at his arm and now my hand was gripping it, keeping him close for comfort. The pressure of his hug increased in return to help ground me.
"It is not the Na'vi way, and it is far from Eywa. I can see why you would dislike it." He was trying to reason with me and make my fears valid, but I knew it was more than that for me.
"No. I am scared of the humans here, I think." The croak in my throat accompanied the sting of tears and I leaned forward, hiding my face in his arms. "When we were in the TAP school we could trust no one. And when Toruk Makto ended the war they all turned on us though we had done nothing. Yes, there are some humans here that are helping. But to what end? They still use the holotables and the tablets and radios. They fight with guns and metal and fire. They can't eat our food, or live in our air."
"It's only a handful of humans and they are trying to make up for what the Sky People have done. It is their duty to try to make things right." Eetu was more positive than I was and I shook my head, my forehead rubbing against his forearm and wiping off some of my facepaint.
"But what of after the war? They have nowhere to go and we can't just kick them back to the sky. It's not like the RDA. They don't have the spaceships and the cryobeds to send everyone home. They will have to stay here and we never know when they will need more resources. Their stuff will eventually start to break down. And then… some of the humans have talked about starting families. There will be more of them over time." My voice tightened. "What if everything I'm doing to restore Pandora is for nothing?"
"Then we will have to teach them to respect Eywa and teach them our ways. The Toruk Makto, Jake Sulley… he was once a human. He lived in a dreamwalker shell and learned the ways of our people. He became one of us and chose to forsake the Sky People for Eywa. If they are willing to betray their people to help us now, they will be open to learning how to live here after the war. Without a kuru they will never have a true connection to Eywa, but they can at least respect her." I admired his confidence and I turned my head to smile. He pushed an errant feather out of my face.
"You wear a lot of feathers and beads." He laughed. It was not a normal fashion trend of the Aranahe, or the Serantu for that matter.
"Well, the beads are because Mercer never let us have anything like that. We wore plain outfits made in human fashion and he took any accessories. My sister used to keep our mother's songcord but he took that as well. Wearing beads is a reminder than he doesn't control me. As for the feathers… I like to take bits of Pandora with me, and all feathered plants are fun to collect and light to wear." I explained. "But I also like the human concept of 'birds'. They taught us this at TAP, about some of the animals that exist on Earth."
"Birds?" He pronounced the strange English term with a frown. "What is birds?"
"They are flying creatures, kind of like the Ikran or Stingbat. But on earth they are covered in feathers and they are really light with hallow bones."
"I see. We don't have any animals like that on Eywa… just feathered plants to pollinate. Why would they need feathers? Do they use pollen?" This line of questioning was meant to be distracting but it brought me back again to the days in TAP, where I was trapped and afraid.
"They use the feathers to catch the air and fly. The air is lighter on Earth." My smile turned bitter. "I always liked the idea of flying away from the school. I wished I could be a bird."
"Now you can fly, just as you wished. You have an ikran." Eetu leaned forward and nuzzled his cheek into mine. "You don't have to be afraid of the humans anymore, yawne. You have Telisi and you have me. No matter what happens after the war, we can solve it together. Stop worrying about things that haven't happened."
I knew to my bones he was genuine. For the first time since I first walked into the Kinglor Forest, breaking free of my childhood prison, I felt secure. No longer was the anxiety about the humans haunting me, and now I had someone I could trust. I would tackle the lingering doubt I still had from my nightmares and my suspicions about Alma later. Instead, tonight, I would allow myself peace in the arms of the man I loved.
We stayed by the fire, waiting for Nor and Ri'nela to appear, but they never came back. It was just as well, because any time I spent with my mate was not wasted. Tomorrow we would go to the rookery and find a new bond for Eetu so he could fly alongside me. But I was following his advice and putting that aside for now as an adventure for another time. It would be criminal to waste a moment since I lost so much time before. Every day I was growing more and more into my role as a Sarentu, and it felt like less of a burden with him.
Eventually we would all have to face our past. Alma would have to face her compliance in the downfall of our clan and subsequent kidnapping. My every instinct was right down to my desire to keep the truth to myself. After Nor learned of what truly happened he had to face his anger and responded with violence. Teylan had to face his human side and his Na'vi side. Ri'nela would have to try to keep everything together while denying her true feelings, heartbroken that Nor left.
We saved Pandora. We held Mercer accountable. But it had a great emotional toll on me. The greatest decision I ever made was to mate with Eetu because without him I would have been lonely I couldn't cope. With every betrayal he was there to hold my hand and be my support. I was criticized for prioritizing romance over war, but I couldn't regret it. Every day I wake up and he is there and I go to sleep and he is there. Pandora may be forever changed by the humans but at least my relationship with Eetu never will.