Letting It All Out
As always, all the credit goes to the WTB staff, producers, writers and cast. This takes place early season 7, a few months after TAN. I took some liberties with timeframes with Tony still dating Kathleen when Sam is already moved into the dorms. Also made it earlier in the season than it would have been in the show.
Samantha came home one afternoon to grab some of her stuff, possibly raid the kitchen for some food for the dorms and to hopefully get some peace and quiet to do some studying. She had just made herself a snack and had settled into the sofa in the living room when Jonathan came in the front door.
"Well there goes my peace and quiet!" she complained as she ate a bite of her snack.
"Well there goes the food in the house! Don't they have food in college? Or a place to bother other people?" he said sarcastically.
"Listen dweeb, I'm just here to try and get some studying done. You have no idea how annoying it is living somewhere that is noisy 24/7! I cant get anything done!" she said as she flipped through some of her books.
"I'd love to be somewhere where there's noise. For the past few weeks this place has been a ghost town. Mom's always out with what's his face, Tony's busy with Kathleen and Grandma… who knows where or what or who she's been up to! I'm practically raising myself around here…" he said as he stole some food off her plate.
"Hey that's mine dweeb! Get your own!" she said as she pulled the plate away from Jonathan. "I didn't realize it was that bad around here. I know things have changed since they started dating other people but that sounds a bit extreme. I'm sure it's not that bad" she said.
"Let's face it Sam. Things are not the same as they were for the past six years. It's weird. It's like they've forgotten how to be around each other. You're not around so you don't see it like I do. First, you were in New Mexico and now the dorms. It's like our family doesn't exist anymore…" he said as he stared down at his shoes.
"Don't you think you're being a bit dramatic? It's not that bad. Besides… this weekend is our sixth anniversary. We always do something as a family. I'm sure Dad and Angela have something planned. Just wait and see…" she said as she got back to her studies.
"If you say so… just don't hold your breath for this weekend…" said Jonathan as he stole more food from her plate and took off up the stairs before Samantha could do anything to stop him.
A few hours later, Samantha finished her work and went to pack up her stuff. Tony came in from the kitchen with his books and placed them on the side table.
"Sam! What are you doing here?" asked Tony.
"Nice to see you too Dad! Just came here to do some studying in peace! What are you up to?" she asked.
"I've got a date tonight with Kathleen. Came home to get dinner ready and then I'm heading out. If you want to stick around, I think Jonathan and Angela will be home later. Who knows about Mona!" he laughed as he started to straighten up the living room. Just then, Angela and Mona walked in the front door and Jonathan came down the stairs.
"Hi sweethearts! How was school Jonathan? How's college life Samantha?" asked Angela as she hung up her coat and briefcase.
"It was good Mom. You going to be around for dinner tonight?" asked Jonathan as he gave a quick glance at Samantha.
"Actually sweetheart, I'm going out tonight with Andy for dinner" she said as she flipped through the mail left on the side desk. Jonathan didn't say a word but just stared intently at Samantha with an "I told you so look" on his face. Only Mona could see the interaction between the two.
"Oh that's too bad Angela. I was going to hang around tonight for dinner. I was hoping the five of us could catch up" she said. Tony and Angela both gave each other an awkward look as they turned away from one another, going back to their mindless tasks.
"Maybe some other time okay?" said Angela as she put the mail down and headed to her office.
"Well maybe we can all catch up on Friday! What are the big plans? Fancy dinner? Carnival in Brooklyn? What do you all have planned?" asked Samantha.
"Friday? I have tickets to see a Broadway show with Kathleen. I didn't know you wanted to hang out Sam. I wish you had told me…" he said as he sat down next to her on the sofa.
Angela's heart dropped as she realized Tony had forgotten about their anniversary. She had purposely kept Friday night open as she knew it was September 20th and they had always done something as a family. She supposed she shouldn't be surprised with how off things had been the last few weeks. As she had become more and more accustomed to doing these past few weeks, she pushed down her sadness and put on a smile.
"I'll be around Samantha. Why don't we do a girls night? We can rent a movie and make some popcorn, just us!" she said with forced enthusiasm.
"Are you both serious? Do you not know what Friday is? It's our sixth anniversary of when Dad and I moved to Connecticut. How could you forget?" she said with tears in her eyes.
"I told you so Samantha. They didn't remember. They don't even care about us anymore… about our family. Its all about Andy and Kathleen… Let's face it Sam, this family is over" said Jonathan with more than a touch of anger in his voice.
Angela and Tony sat their speechless, both in total and complete shock over Samantha and Jonathan's words. Angela was the first one to snap out of it.
"Jonathan! How can you say that? You and Samantha are the most important people in our lives! Tony and I love you both and would do anything for this family!" she practically shouted.
"Sell it to someone else Mom. How can you say you and Tony would do anything for this family when you've barely said two words to one another over the past few weeks? You can barely be in the same room. When was the last time we all ate dinner together? Hmm? I can tell you- it was the night Samantha came home from New Mexico… six weeks ago! Since then, one of you has had a date or something else to avoid being together. Do you know I've eaten dinner by myself for the past week?" said Jonathan as his voice started to falter.
"Listen buddy… we've all been busy…with school, with work…" Tony started but Samantha interrupted.him.
"Save it Dad! He's right… I wish he wasn't but he is right. I'm sorry I doubted you before Jonathan. I just didn't want to believe what you were saying was true. I guess… I guess it's over…" she said as she jumped off the sofa, tears running down her face, as she bounded up the stairs.
"I hope you both enjoy your nights… see you when I graduate…" he said sarcastically as he headed up the stairs.
Both Tony and Angela sat there stunned again, tears forming in both their eyes. They finally looked up at one another, knowing there was so much to say, but neither being able to form the words. Mona, who had been surprisingly quiet through the whole family conversation, decided it was time to give her two cents.
"Well, that was something else wasn't it? Didn't know they had it in them, especially Jonathan. I guess the apple didn't fall far from the tree!" she chuckled.
"Mother! This isn't the time for jokes! This is serious! I had no idea they felt like this! Did you Tony?" she asked.
"Of course not! Who knew they felt this way?" he asked.
"Who knew? Who knew? You'd have to be blind, deaf and dumb- or named Angela and Tony- to not pick up on this storm that's been brewing for the past few weeks. You two have been so wrapped up in avoiding each other, you haven't seen what's right in front of you- two kids who are terrified of losing the only family, the only opposite parent, they've known for the past six years. What do you think has gone through their minds each time you two see frick and frack? Hmmm? As you two spend more and more time with them, getting closer and closer, moving farther and farther away from each other? What happens if you marry Andy? If you get engaged to Kathleen? What does that mean for your relationship with Jonathan, Tony? How about you and Samantha, Angela? Look… we've all thought you two would somehow see the error of your ways, dump those two and finally have your happily ever after together. That's obviously not happening anytime soon to my disappointment, but regardless of that, you two have a responsibility to those two kids up there- you know, the ones you threw together six years ago and formed this family for… now wake up and do something about it before it's too late!" she said as she also headed upstairs, leaving them sitting on the sofa, once again stunned into silence.
"I… I don't know what to say Tony. How could we be this blind? They've been suffering and we missed it? What kind of parents are we Tony?" she said with tears in her eyes.
"Eh oh, oh eh! We are great parents Angela! I mean we've been…distracted recently, but we've still been here for them! I guess it's understandable they are confused… it's a bit confusing for all of us trying to figure… figure this out… but they know we love them, that we are there for them!" said Tony.
"Confused Tony? Confused about what exactly?" she asked with sarcasm in her voice.
Tony was taken aback by the tone in her voice. He wasn't used to hearing that rough tone coming from Angela.
"Ummm… you know… confused about… things…" he said, not knowing how or if he should continue, opening what he assumed would be a Pandora's box he didn't know if it could be contained once opened.
"Things? Things Tony?" she said, now with anger in her voice. Tony inwardly and outwardly cringed as he saw the metaphorical box spring open.
"Okay Tony… so these things… could some of those things be how we worked so hard these past six years to build this family for it all to come tumbling down last spring? We… we had something Tony. Something special… you… you had my heart Tony! And you broke it into a million pieces when you did what you did. It's one thing to lose yourself in a moment of passion- like I said I've been tempted too… but to keep seeing her? Dating her after talking in Jamaica about getting married once you knew more about you. Did she help you figure that out Tony? Do you know now? Is it crystal clear I wasn't the one? I wasn't enough for you? Because that's the only explanation Tony. You figured out I wasn't the one for you…" she said, the anger very present in her voice, but the sadness seeping through, tears threatening to fall.
"Do you know how much that hurt Tony? To know I wasn't enough for you? Seeing you with someone… someone younger, perkier… prettier… and then one brief conversation and then nothing? I felt like I lost not only my best friend, but the future I saw us having… it was like it was here one day, gone the next… along with my heart…" she said, tears now falling freely.
"Oh Angela… I… I'm so sorry. I knew I'd hurt you but I had no idea just how badly I hurt you, hurt everyone. Like I said before, I wasn't looking for this… it just happened… but it's no excuse for how much I screwed this all up. It's obvious to me now how this impacted more than just me. I don't know how else I can say just how sorry I am Angela. So very sorry…" he said, tears falling down his face.
"You're wrong though Angela. You not being enough was never the problem. Don't you see Angela? Even with a college degree, a 'budding' career… I'll still never be good enough for someone like you. I could never be the guy you deserved. I'll always be some washed up ex-ball player from Brooklyn, while you are… you're everything Angela. You're beautiful, smart, funny, talented, beautiful… you not being the one isn't the issue… it's me Angela. It's always been me. You're heart wasn't the only one broken…" he said as he had to wipe away tears from his eyes.
"Oh Tony…" she started, the anger no longer lingering in her voice. "Maybe it's both of us. Maybe like we said, we have to both go through this stage of our lives to know if there is something there between us. I think a part of me will always feel like I'm not enough for someone like you, just like you feel the same way about me. We've forgotten that underneath everything is a strong foundation we have built over the last six years. A foundation built on honesty, on understanding, on… love. We owe it to ourselves, but more importantly our family, to remember that and not let our insecurities get the best of us" she said as she reached out for his hand.
"You're right Angela. There's too much at stake here to let anything get in the way of our family. I think we need to figure out a way to start putting the pieces of this family back together" he said as he took her hand and placed a gentle kiss on top.
"Let's cancel all our plans for this Friday and plan something really special for all of us! I'm going to make a better effort to be home more, especially for Jonathan. I have dinner scheduled next week with Kathleen and her father, but after that, I should be free for dinners" said Tony.
"I'll make sure I'm home earlier the rest of the week and all next week. I've only got a Yale game scheduled with Andy in a couple of weeks, so I'll make sure I'm around more too" she said as they both stood up and headed for the stairs.
"And Angela… not for nothing… no one and I mean no one is prettier than you. That's a fact…" he said as he headed up the stairs.
She couldn't help but blush as a smile slowly spread across her face as she too headed up the stairs.