Much as Rosemary and Lee wanted to stay in Cape Fullerton, they knew that they had to get right into the wagon and start making their way to Hope Valley so they wouldn't get caught by the setting sun. The road between the two towns was often used in the daylight, but anyone with any sense at all knew that driving a wagonload of furniture and belongings in the dark was a fool's errand.
As they walked from Mountie Headquarters toward the locked garage where Rosemary's things had spent the night, Lee reached out and tentatively touched Rosemary's fingers with his own. To his relief, her fingers curled around his warmly, holding tight. They didn't look at each other. Both just looked straight ahead and smiled.
They knew everything was different. That kiss hadn't been just a kiss. It was the culmination of weeks of longing and wondering, and the passion it had brought out in both of them was giving them pause as they walked through the Cape Fullerton crowds. If that kiss was any indication, it wasn't going to be possible for them to remain "just friends."
Rosemary's left hand was in Lee's right, and she was feeling some pressure on one of her fingers - the finger with her wedding band. She suddenly stopped and looked down at their clasped hands. Lee followed her sightline, puzzled, and as she splayed out her fingers and wiggled them slightly, Lee exhaled.
He tilted his head and looked up at her. "Rosie..." He took her hand in his and held it so that she could continue to look at the ring. "We don't have to rush this..."
Rosemary gazed at him, and Lee knew this look well already. There were a million ideas going on behind those sea-green eyes of hers, and he knew enough to just let them play out. And then, there it was, the slight narrowing of her eyes and a steely determination.
She reached down and started to pull off the ring, and Lee said softly, "You don't have to do that..."
"No, Lee," she said firmly. "I want to." She wiggled it off her finger and tucked it into her purse, and then she looked back into his eyes. "I think we both know that the woman who kissed you in that office is no longer committed to another man."
Lee was working very hard at holding it together. He was elated at the turn of events of the last hour, but wanted to be certain this was the right thing for Rosemary. "Are you sure?" he said softly, his dark brown eyes searching hers.
Rosemary suddenly smiled and Lee felt the sun come out. She raised an eyebrow. "Well, Lee Coulter, you were on the other side of that kiss. What do you think?"
Lee was trying to remember the last time he had blushed, and he realized that this was the second time in an hour that it had happened. He was still trying to process how it felt to have her in his arms, to feel her pressing against him, her mouth warm and urgent on his. He was almost wondering if he had dreamed it.
Finally, Lee let out a deep breath and smiled. "What do I think? I think I'm a very happy man right now, Rosie." He took her hand in his again and looked down at it. "But I know a thing or two about grief." He looked up into her eyes again. "I know that it can sneak up on you when you least expect it. You don't have to make any decisions today or tomorrow or the next day."
Rosemary smiled softly at him. "You're a very good man, you know that?"
In answer, Lee shrugged and made a face. Rosemary reached her hand up and put it on his cheek. "Do you realize that you and I have known each other longer than Jack and I lived together as husband and wife?"
Lee frowned and let out a breath. "Wow. Well, that puts it into perspective, doesn't it?"
Rosemary turned and started walking again, her hand still clasped firmly in Lee's. "I'm not worried about anyone but Charlotte." Then she turned and looked at Lee, still striding purposefully toward the garage. "But I won't let Charlotte dictate how I'm going to live the rest of my life. Just because she's chosen to live hers out alone, doesn't mean I have to."
The combination of his happiness and Rosemary's conviction finally spilled over into a laugh that turned into something of a snort from Lee.
Rosemary turned sharply and frowned, "You don't believe me?"
Lee laughed and shook his head. "Oh, I believe you. Believe me, I believe you completely." His eyes went soft and he walked Rosemary over to the space between two buildings. He'd waited so long for this, and now his patience seemed to be at an historic low. He leaned into her and he could see that, rather than pushing him away, Rosemary held a challenge in her eyes.
"Is this okay, Rosie?" Lee said softly, kissing her cheek so gently that Rosemary closed her eyes, feeling the warmth of his skin against hers.
"Um-hmmm," she said, a little breathlessly.
"How about this?" Lee whispered, brushing his lips across hers.
Rosemary smiled. "That's good, too," she said as she tilted her head to the side and pulled him toward her. Very quickly, his tentative kisses lost their playfulness as Lee pressed up against her in the dim alleyway. There was still a busy, bustling city life going on just a few feet away, but they were hidden in the shadows, and both of them quickly forgot where they were.
Lee knew that he had fallen over the edge completely. There was no turning back for him, and this sudden abandon made him realize how firmly he'd been keeping his feelings in check. He loved this woman beyond anything he'd even known was possible.
And from the way she was kissing him back, Lee thought there might be hope that Rosemary felt the same.
"Tell me about Abigail," Clara said, buttering her toast as the countryside flew by outside the window.
Elizabeth smiled and reached her hand under the table to place it on Nathan's leg. He reciprocated by putting his arm around her as she leaned against him. They hadn't slept quite as well on the mattresses on the floor as they had in the featherbeds of Hamilton, and she was feeling tired.
And yes, she had other suspicions, but she had vowed not to tell Nathan until she was certain. They'd been married for over a month now, and Elizabeth was one of the lucky ones whose cycles ran like clockwork. She was two weeks overdue, and she couldn't remember that ever happening since she was a very young girl.
Holding a secret from Nathan was nearly impossible for Elizabeth, but he'd had so much grief in his life, she had no intention of adding to it. She'd spoken to enough women who had been certain of a pregnancy and had miscarried very early on, that she knew how fragile it was at this point. She would wait until she'd missed at least twice before sharing the news with her husband. And she would talk with Abigail. Abigail would know when it was safe to tell him.
Smiling across at Clara, Elizabeth envied the young girl's appetite. Although Elizabeth had ordered tea, eggs and toast, she'd only sipped at the tea so far. If she was going to keep this from Nathan for a time, she would need to eat, although she had no desire for it this morning.
"Abigail?" Elizabeth said, sitting up straight and reaching for a piece of toast. "I wouldn't know where to begin. Perhaps if you ask questions?"
Clara nodded. "Is she nice?"
Elizabeth laughed. "Very. And kind, and compassionate and smart. And beautiful," Elizabeth said, looking at Nathan for confirmation. He gazed back at her and smiled.
"Much like Elizabeth," Nathan said to Clara, though he couldn't take his eyes off of his wife. There was something different about her and he was trying to put his finger on what it was. The simplest answer he could think of was that she seemed to have changed somehow since they'd married last month, and it was all to the good.
Not that she hadn't been serious before, but she seemed more pensive. And she'd always been beautiful, but there was a shine to her eyes that was brighter, and a depth to her gaze that seemed to hold volumes that he wanted to read. He'd always loved discovering new things about Elizabeth, but now, even more, he wanted to know everything that went on in her head, all her thoughts and dreams.
And in a moment he knew there was something she was keeping from him. And in the next moment, as he watched her grimace after nibbling on her toast, he knew what it was.
Sitting next to her in the Club Car on the train heading back home toward Hope Valley, Nathan's heart suddenly expanded exponentially. Of course he'd thought about it, of course he wanted children. They'd talked about it many times, and both felt the same; the sooner, the better. But now, looking into Elizabeth's eyes, he saw it all – what it had felt like to hold Allie for the first time, just hours after she'd been born. How he'd sat for the longest time looking into her eyes and wondering what mysteries were held there.
And now, it would be a child that he and Elizabeth had created together. Not one that he would love any more than he loved Allie, but one that held their history in its bones and its blood.
"Nathan?" Elizabeth said, and he realized she was frowning. He reached up with his thumb and smoothed the lines in the space between her eyebrows gently.
"Sorry," he said, almost in a whisper. "I was just thinking about everything I have to do when we get back..."
She didn't believe him, but she would ask him later.
Lee put his hands on Rosemary's waist and helped her up into the wagon before climbing up himself. The fact that they'd finally managed to tear themselves away from that alley was miraculous in itself, but now they were running late.
"We're going to have to push the horses a little," Lee said, settling in and taking the reins.
Rosemary tucked the blanket around her legs and pulled her coat tighter. She looked up at the sky, and watched as the bright blue was slowly being encroached upon by the clouds coming in from the north. "Does it look like it might rain to you?" she said, squinting her eyes.
Lee looked up and then moved the horses out into the traffic on the street. "It might. It's why I covered all your things with a tarpaulin."
Rosemary looked a little horrified. "And what about us?" she said, her voice rising.
Lee smiled. "Oh, I have one for us, too," he said, reaching back and pointing at a folded green square behind the seat.
Rosemary's eyes went wide. "So you intend to take a pregnant woman across the country in a rainstorm with... that... over us?"
Laughing, Lee turned to her. "Rosie, you do have a flair for the dramatic statement."
Rosemary laughed too. Lee had a way of making her hear herself like no one else, and what she'd just heard sounded ridiculous. She lifted her chin. "Well, I should hope I'm dramatic. I'm an actress, after all."
"That you are, Rosie. That you are." He reached an arm out and she raised an eyebrow before scooting herself over on the seat closer to him. "I'll protect you," Lee said, leaning over and kissing her head.
Rosemary sighed and put her head on his shoulder as the wagon rumbled down the city street heading out of town. For now, she could do this. Show affection, take comfort in the steadiness and solidity that Lee had offered her virtually from the first day they'd met. She moved even closer, feeling his warmth, and he held her tighter, one hand on the reins and one around her.
"Are you warm enough?" Lee asked. "I have more blankets."
Rosemary looked up at him and couldn't help reaching up a finger to trace the angular lines of his chin and up over his jaw, into the dark hair at his temples. "You have a good face," she said softly, gazing at him.
Lee took a deep breath and looked back at her, letting the horses take the reins a little as they moved past the outskirts of town. He leaned down and she raised her chin up as he kissed her. "Rosie..." he said tentatively, closing his eyes.
"I know..." she said against his lips. "Me, too."
Nathan and Elizabeth didn't really think they'd ever watch the moon in quite the same way again after these train trips. How they'd managed to have a full moon on the way out to Hamilton and one on the way back was simply serendipity, but this ritual of lying in the moonlight on their bed on the floor was becoming a favorite.
Elizabeth's hand was on Nathan's chest, as she absentmindedly curled a finger through the soft hairs there. She leaned over and kissed the spot just below his ear and began to move closer. Sighing, he moved his head back to give her more room, but as she pressed against him, she felt him stiffen just a little.
"What?" she said, opening her eyes and looking at him.
"I... I just wondered if we should..." He exhaled in slight frustration. Tongue-tied Nathan was back.
"If we should what?" she said, a frown beginning.
After she saw him open his mouth and close it several times, Elizabeth sat up. Her back was toward the moonlight, and Nathan saw a halo form around her curls as she looked quizzically at him.
"Nathan?" she said, brushing her fingers across his cheek, "You haven't been yourself all day. What's going on?"
She was so beautiful that he was having trouble forming the words, and not only because they were difficult to say. Elizabeth's skin looked incandescent in the light, and her nightgown had fallen open at the neck, revealing the rise of her breast just below the lace. He had never wanted her more.
"I just wonder if we should... if it's alright... since you're..." Oh, this was going to take all night if he didn't just spit it out.
"Is it good for the baby?" he finally blurted out, and then exhaled suddenly, as if he'd just been at a full run on Newton.
"The..." Elizabeth gasped, and then her mouth fell open. "How could you possibly know...?"
They stared at each other in the rare perfect storm of both of them being tongue-tied. Finally, Nathan smiled and reached his hand out gently to place it on her stomach. In the moonlight, she could see his eyes beginning to glisten as he whispered, "Is it true?"
Smiling back, and feeling her own tears coming, Elizabeth said, "I think so."
Nathan gently pulled her toward him, already feeling that he was handling something made of fine china, something breakable and even more precious than she'd been before. Elizabeth lay stretched out on top of him, and they held each other in silence for a time, both of them with thoughts racing but too much in their heads to even begin to say it out loud. She felt his breathing calm as his inhale became her exhale, moving naturally together in tandem, as they always did.
Finally, Elizabeth turned her head and looked at him. She put her lips at his throat, feeling the pulse there, and breathing in the familiar aroma of his shaving soap. Her happiness was at a level that was impossible to express. She had never loved him more than she did in this moment.
Moving her mouth up to his, Elizabeth kissed him, gently at first, and then more deeply. Their bodies were already in motion with the train, and Nathan was beginning to realize that there would soon be no turning back.
"'Lizbeth," he said hoarsely against her cheek, "Tell me this is okay..."
Laughing softly, she sat up to pull her nightgown over her head. "It's more than okay." Leaning back down, she said, "And if you think we're going to stop doing this for another eight months, you're dreaming..."