The other alters went to their individual spaces to give Barry and Yugen some privacy—Dennis, Patricia, and Hedwig left for the train station.
"Barry told her and she accepted us, she's even met some of the others." Patricia states with reverence towards the saintly beast.
"She also has a friend with the same gift as us." Dennis chimes in with devotion and subtle timidity.
The beast laughs with victorious respite as he turns his back to the horde, his eyes glaze over in thought as he stares at the glass in front of him, placing his hands together with benediction. "Blessed be the broken..." The beast turns around to face the horde once again, "I want to know what she's like with Kevin."
Dennis and Patricia glance at each other, flummoxed by the command. Hedwig's face contorts with perplexity, then he states with childish bemusement, "what?"
Although the beasts reasoning clicked with Patricia, Dennis still had questions. He nervously runs a hand over his scalp, "Uh...forgive me but, I thought the point in all of this was to protect Kevin, not put him in harms way..." Dennis wasn't afraid of Yugen, in fact, he thought she was special; but people are unpredictable. For Kevin's sake, he and some of the others were reluctant to let him have the light.
The beast let out a gnarring huff, then Patricia began to explain, "Dennis, don't you understand? He wants to find out if we can trust her to keep him safe." Patricia then speaks directly to the beast, "Am I correct?"
"You are correct, my child. Convince the others that Kevin should take the light, it won't take long after that to find out if she's a friend or foe." The beast words rumbled authoritatively, his chest heaving as his god-like stature allowed no further question.
Barry and Yugen didn't sleep that night, so they decided to go to Penn Treaty Park. They sat at a bench shoulder to shoulder, sipping coffee with donuts in their laps. Barry looked her over, salaciously peering at her outfit. She wore the same mini dress under a black wool coat with leather on the sleeves, as well as a pair of grey thigh high cable knit socks, and a pair of knee high boots.
"This girl could put on a moo moo and totally pull it off," Barry laughs at Jades abrupt statement.
Yugen turned her head at his sudden outburst with a curious smile, "what's so funny?"
"Jade thinks you could wear a moo moo and manage to pull it off," Barry smirks and Yugen sniggers at the comment.
"That's sweet." Yugen sips her coffee, hoping to hide her awkward blushing.
"So tell me a little about your friend Sarah, how did you two meet?" Barry questioned, then took a sip of his coffee.
Yugen explains to Barry that when she was 18, she got a job at a doggy day care walking dogs; a job that helped her loose a lot of weight. She mentions that she wanted to learn self defense and why—after Yugen and her mother's intense arguments that often consisted of cruel insults, and emotional manipulation where suicidal threats and self injury were involved, her mom would pay psychiatric facilities to abduct her, locking her away for a prolonged period of time, not knowing if she would ever leave. She felt ashamed of the fact that she was too weak to fight back, so she joined a kickboxing gym that taught MMA and Krav Maga, which is where she met Sarah. However, Sarah was not the one she met. Morrigan was the first—she was the fighter, the protector. She tried on several occasions to talk to Yugen, but Yugen wasn't well acclimated with social interaction that didn't involve meaningless cordiality with stuck up rich people, or a screaming match with her mom; so when she first put herself out there, she was very nervous and didn't really know what to do with herself. After a few conversations, Morrigan realized that Yugen was a very sad, sheltered, tortured little rich girl desperately trying to find her place in the world. Then she met Sarah, to whom she got close to very quickly. Over a course of a few months, Sarah and Morrigan noticed her restrictive diet and her bulimia, they also took notice of it gradually getting worse; she ate very little and always went to the bathroom afterwards, she never went out to eat when invited, her hair started to fall out, and one day she even passed out at the gym.
"Sarah has an alter named Katie who's an anorexic teenager, so they noticed similar symptoms." Yugen paused for a moment, staring at a donut hole in the palm of her hand, feeling overcome by a sudden loss of appetite.
Barry plucked the sugary ball of fried dough from her hand and popped it in his mouth, pulling her from her somber daydream. He decided it would be best to lightly change the subject, "so was she like, your first BFF?"
Yugen smiles as she gazes at her coffee, "she was my first everything."
Barry stops chewing upon Yugen's simple admission, "wow! I get it now."
Barry wraps his arm around Yugen, urging her to lean in closer. They rest their heads against each other, watching the sunrise over the Delaware River. From that moment on, days turned into weeks, weeks turned into months; before they knew it, it was nearly Christmas.
Barry didn't have to work during the holiday, so him and the others decided to spend their Christmas at Yugen's. Jade and Yugen stole one of Barry's mannequins and turned it into a Christmas tree, which everyone got a kick out of. Yugen used an old black and purple corset and a black tulle skirt for the upper half, they attached chicken wire to the bottom half then attached the greenery, adorning it with blue and purple lights and ornaments.
Yugen made fried chicken and pecan pie with Norma, who apologized quite frequently when she wasn't talking about her childhood at her parents farmhouse. She was the youngest of two brothers and one sister, the boys would work outside and the girls worked in the home, mostly in the kitchen. Her siblings moved on while she still lived there, when Norma was nineteen her parents died, leaving her and her siblings no choice but to sell the farmhouse. When she was twenty, she married a man who physically and psychologically abused her. One day, when she was lying in a hospital bed on the brink of death, she woke up and wandered off into the woods. She didn't know where she was going, nor did she understand why she felt compelled to go for a walk in the woods, but that was where she found her place among Kevin's system; Yugen felt brief concern at the possibility that she too may be an alter.
Bernice, a Spanish speaking alter, helped Yugen make bean and cheese papusas and chocolate chip cookies. She was ecstatic that Yugen knew fluent Spanish, and was giddy to discuss various topics on Mexican culture. They had long discussions about Frida Kahlo and Diego Rivera, all while listening to Chavela Vargas. As she waspishly flattened out the dough in her hands, she talked about how her Dad would beat her Mom as her and her five other siblings watch, sullen with sheer helplessness. When Bernice was in her late 20's, she walked miles across the desert to escape to America. She wasn't sure how she ended up in Philadelphia, but expressed that she was grateful to be welcomed into the system.
Heinrich made a fried potato dish called Bratkartoffeln, a dish that's native to Germany, which is originally where he's from. He came to Philly for an internship at the mutter museum, which he did obtain, but after a night of bar hopping and binge drinking he somehow wandered off and found a home with the other alters. Heinrich was a quirky guy who not only knew how to cook, but also knew how to have fun and enjoy the simple things in life; good food, good books, and good beer—as he put it. Yugen enjoyed his simplistic outlook on life, as well as his morose sense of humor and his questionable infatuation with Rammstein. She found each of Kevin's alters deeply fascinating, unique, and complex. Since his alters seem to just wonder off, she wondered if they could be ghosts, lost souls that didn't feel finished and managed to find a purpose.
Barry and Yugen sat back on the couch, snuggled under a pink blanket sipping eggnog. The fire place crackled, an orange glow flickered around the dark apartment, creating romantic ambiance in a silent atmosphere. A vintage wooden bowl filled with pine cones sat in the middle of the table, filling the air with cinnamon spice.
"You know uh—some of the others, they're getting onto me about… you meeting Kevin." Barry stammered with reluctance.
"Well, maybe it would be a good idea… I mean, he deserves the light just as much as you and the others do." Yugen paused to take a sip of her eggnog, allowing Barry to think as he gazed into the flames, "plus, I would like to meet him."
Barry immediately looks over at Yugen, "you do understand that Kevin is very fragile? Even if he is in the light, it may be a matter of time until he pulls away from it." Barry's eyes were wide with anguish, yet sparkling with hope.
Yugen gives him a reassuring smile, "I know that Kevin will require some patience and I'll help him as much as I can, but I would still like to meet him; even if it's only for a moment. Besides, there are a few others I haven't met right?"
Barry looks down at his eggnog, tapping his glass apprehensively. A loud crack came from the fireplace, prompting him to answer. "Yeah um—well, Rakel and Felida are the main reason you haven't met Polly, Kat, and Jalin. Don't be offended, it's just they're very protective of them in particular. And Hedwig… he can be a bit of a handful. Dennis and Patricia on the other hand, you are NOT allowed to meet."
The names Hedwig, Dennis, and Patricia rang a very loud bell. Yugen hadn't heard those names in months and she wasn't entirely sure if they were alters, but now she knew, and that knowledge made her throat dry as her heart began to drop. She cleared her throat and asked, "Why not?"
"Well their beliefs for one, they have this idea that this… beast made up of various animals that I take care of at work was born to… avenge the broken?" Barry scoffs at the abstract philosophy that him, as well as others felt was nothing more than fear mongering, "It's completely ridiculous! And Dennis..." Barry sighs and shakes his head, resistant to continue, "he has a fondness for watching young women dance naked."
Yugen's thoughts drifted between Barry's words and one profound memory—she thought of the large, terrifying animal in the clearing, he too must be an alter; one that hasn't fully emerged and only the three other alters must know about him. Her emotions shifted between terror and intrigue as she realized she must've been in Kevin's mind, then her mind diverged from her current train of thought back to Barry's words, "how young?" She asked.
Barry explains that he prefers women sixteen to seventeen years of age, that it had something to do with a girl Dennis and Kevin knew, just before Barry emerged. He didn't know the full story and Dennis refused to talk about it, rendering Barry no other option except to ban him from the light. Yugen understood, then decided it was best not to press the matter any further. Instead, she asked Barry where he came from and how he became a part of the system.
Barry grew up with a his mother who raised him by herself, she was an alcoholic artist that moved them all over New York, in search of her big break. Although she was very talented, she had no motivation. Barry loved his mother when she was sober, but when she was drunk she would say very cruel things to him, blaming him for her shortcomings. He was often left with messes that consisted of paint and vomit, up until she died when he was 17.
"The doctors said it was liver failure…" Barry's eyes burn with melancholy as he stares into the fire.
Yugen rests her head on Barry's shoulder with a soft smile, "It's okay, I understand. As far a Kevin is concerned, one day?"
"One day." Barry winks at Yugen then holds up his glass of eggnog, they clank their glasses together, then knock back the rest of their drinks in mutual agreement.
"By the way, I thought you were the bossy fix it guy at the zoo?!" Yugen vivaciously changed the subject, hoping to lighten the heaviness in the air.
Barry titters and his cheeks turn pink, explaining that he was nervous on their first date and that it wasn't a complete lie. He began to describe his job more indepthly—the majority of his job consists of supervising employees as well as the care and handling of animals. He reveals that he isn't that handy, but then playfully affirms that he assigns and supervises other handy men. Although Barry didn't show it, he was constantly thrown by her attention to detail, and a bit unnerved by her tendency to keep it to herself; unknowing of the many revelations that await him.
Yugen stands up and takes both of their glasses to the kitchen, "By the way, I have a present for you."
"Uh oh! Dare I ask what it is?" Barry asked playfully as Yugen fetches the flat rectangular gift, neatly wrapped in red paper with happy little snowmen.
"You'll just have to unwrap it." Yugen states with a flirtatious smile.
"Hm, maybe later." Barry teased, quickly looking her over before tearing the paper off, exposing an exact replication of his appearance in Kevin's mind. Barry's eyes were wide, fear and confusion obliterated his normally friendly face.
Very quickly, Yugen became concerned. Oh shit! What the hell was I thinking?! Her thoughts were consumed with panic and self loathing, her brows knitted and her eyes glistened as she slowly began to drown beneath a wave of sadness. Barry's head began to dart back and forth between Yugen and the painting before responding, "um Yugen, what is this? H-how?"
Devastated by the trembling in his voice, Yugen took a deep breath, blinking back the threat of tears. "During my period, I go into a trance and I do these paintings…" Yugen's voice wavered, she sniffled and took another deep breath, "they seem to happen within minutes. I know this because I've gotten used to checking the time and whatever takes over likes to record everyth…"
"Do you have any video's saved?" Barry interrupted.
"Um yeah, you… wanna see them?" Yugen wondered inauspiciously, yet blaming no one but herself for the possibility of loosing Barry and the others.
Barry simply nodded, his eyes were round and his jaw clenched, leaving Yugen glooming at the idea that he was angry and disappointed with her. Yugen went over to her desk and grabbed her laptop, then set it on the table in front of them. She clicked on an older video—a naked woman with dark hair obscuring her face stands motionless in front of the camera, a blank canvas lay in front of her, bottles of paint and brushes surround her; left disorderly.
Barry watches silently and intently, he drew back a little and his forehead creased with confusion as the video skipped, and the woman he recognized to be Yugen was suddenly a quarter way done with her painting. "Yugen honey, this just looks like some sort of glitch." Barry states dryly, desperately wanting it to be true, but knowing good and well it wasn't.
Yugen points at the bottom right hand corner of the screen, "Look at the numbers." The video skips, but the numbers do not.
Barry attempts to rationalize everything as the video continues to 'glitch' several more times until the painting is done, and the camera just shuts off. He stares at the screen silently for a moment, swallowing hard.
"You're freaked out aren't you?" Yugen noticed Barry's distress, normally he took everything in stride and was very good at diffusing tension, but for the moment she felt she had to be the one to diffuse an awkward situation; which is something she's terrible at.
For a split second, Barry looked at her like she's stupid for even asking, then his face began soften. He took a deep breath, and took Yugen's hands in his. "A little, but… you have to understand sweetie, I kinda feel like I just found out my girlfriends the Blair Witch."
Yugen chuckles at the comparison, "I know, I'm sorry I just…" Barry brushes a lock of dark hair behind her ear, then Yugen looks him in the eye, "I wanted to be honest with you."
Barry cups her face with his hands and gives her a soft, sensual kiss on her forehead and whispers, "I know. How about we talk about this more in the morning, alright?"
Buzzed from food, sugar, and alcohol—Yugen simply nods, feeling the small slice of death tugging at her eyelids.
That night, Yugen and the others fell into a deep sleep, Kevin's head rests against hers as they cuddle in a warm embrace. Yugen's eyes flutter open—she stands naked in a dark room filled with chairs, right in the middle of a beam of light that caressed her skin with warmth like that of the sun. She steps over the rubble as she observes her surroundings, rubbing her upper arms as the sun-kissed radiance left her body. Yugen was suddenly hit by a deluge of sadness, fear, and confusion; her eyes settle on a crib in the corner. She walks over to it, silently whispering to herself that she hopes this is all a dream.
Yugen examines the infant in the crib, then at the name in cursive blue letters, "Kevin Wendell…"
"Don't!" Yugen jumps at the voice behind her, turning quickly to notice the woman in the forest clearing. "Do not say his name, if you do you'll throw us all into chaos." Patricia spoke firmly without surrendering her maternal grace, "and no, you're not dreaming." She hands over a slate gray button down to an awestruck Yugen.
Yugen slips on the shirt, then buttons it up, "thank you."
Patricia smiles warmly, "you're welcome dear, would you like to hold him?"
Yugen gazes at the baby, knowing now without a doubt that it is was mind she entered. What the hell is going on with me? She turns back to Patricia and nods, "yeah."
Patricia picks up Kevin, carefully handing him to Yugen, then guides her towards the light. Baby Kevin endearingly clutches Yugen's index finger, she smiles down at him affectionately, just before the light flashed quickly, blinding her and banishing her from Kevin's mind.
Suddenly, she was awake… THEY were awake.
RECOMMENDED SONG: Lacuna Coil-Spellbound