It's a pitch dark night in the Magix County Jail. The cells have no windows, and the only source of light comes from the magical wards placed on the prisoners' cell doors. Inside the cells furthest from the only entrance are six new arrivals. Powerful fairies that the dimension once regarded as heroes.

They hadn't planned to do it on the same day. Each had simply reached their limit in their relationship at the same time. It didn't matter if you were a commoner or a princess. An obscure unknown or a ubiquitous celebrity. If you were a woman, there was a man out there ready to treat you like trash.

These were the thoughts on the fairies' minds as they muttered alone to themselves.

The tall blonde whispered first, "shop."

Next came the one with short black pigtails. "Witch."

The athletic one with natural curls. "Kicks."

Short pink hair. "Error."

Fiery red locks. "Diaspro."

Soft brown tresses. "Sketches."

They were a far cry from 'merry' murderesses, but that night, each one sat slumped over on a limp cot. Locked away in the Magix County Jail, they knew sleep would elude them. All they could do was replay the events that had led to their captivity. Their "Cell Block Tango."

"Shop."

"Witch."

"Kicks."

"Error."

"Diaspro."

"Sketches."

They repeated their whispered chant over and over as it grew in fervor. The imaginary music swelled behind them… or was it imaginary? The Fairy of Music was among those locked up tonight, after all.

Finally ready to address each of their respective crimes, they all came together in a furious chorus. "He had it coming. He had it coming. He only had himself to blame. If you'd have been there. If you'd have seen it-"

Bloom broke off by herself in a harsh bellow. "I betcha you would have done the same."

They went back to chanting their individual words until one girl was ready to explain the circumstances behind her boyfriend's untimely demise. Stella mustered the courage first.

"You know how people have these little habits that get you down? Like Brandon. Brandon liked to hide my wallet. No, not hide. Steal!" Stella spat.

"So I come home this one day, and I'm really irritated, and I'm looking for a bit of retail therapy, and there's Brandon, trying to hide my wallet in his cape! Not hiding. Stealing! He told me I shop too much. I said 'say that one more time!' And he did! So I took the Ring of Solaria out of my jewelry box, and I fired two solar flares…" drum beat. "Into his head."

Stella's friends understood her immediately. When it came to Stella and shopping, anyone standing in her way did so at their own peril. "He had it coming. He had it coming. He only had himself to blame. If you'd have been there. If you'd have seen it. I betcha you would have done the same."

Picking up where Stella left off was Musa. She stepped forward towards the door of her cell, walking on beat as she did. "I met Riven at Red Fountain about two years ago. He told me he was single, and we hit it off right away. So, we started hanging out together. He'd go to class, he'd come visit, I'd fix him a snack, we'd have dinner… and then I found out."

She snarled, throwing her head back in a dramatic flourish. "'Single,' he told me? Single my brass!" She flashed an image of the trumpet she liked to play. "Not only was he dating, oh no, he had a girlfriend. One of those Trix, you know? So that night, when he came by for our date, I fixed him a snack as usual." She smirked. "You know some guys just can't hold their nightshade."

Stella and Musa dropped into synchronized choreography while the other four girls chanted the opening words. "He had it coming. He had it coming. He took a flower in its prime. And then he used it. And he abused it. It was a murder, but not a crime!"

Aisha stepped into the spotlight, hips swaying with attitude. "Carving up the dancefloor for exercise, minding my own business, and in storms my betrothed Nabu in a jealous rage. 'You've been tangoing with Roy,' he says. He was crazy, and he kept on screaming, 'you've been tangoing with Roy!" And then his neck ran into my foot. He ran into my foot ten times." She delivered ten flawless showgirl kicks for reference.

Drumroll... Then the music came back in. "If you'd have been there. If you'd have seen it. I betcha you would have done the same."

Tecna listened to her friends tell their stories with shock. Her experience couldn't be any more different than theirs. "Timmy and I? We were working on a new invention together. A device that draws on raw magic from the primordial dimensions. We were running tests, but the portal was unstable. Timmy died in the explosion while I was away. I tried to tell the police there'd been a calibration error, but they didn't understand my technology."

"So you didn't mean to do it?" Stella asked.

"No!" Tecna protested. "I'm not guilty!"

A bright white spotlight flashed around Tecna, invoking both her innocent intent and the explosion that had taken Timmy's life.

As the white light faded, the hues of the room shifted to orange and red. Fire colors. The Winx girls' voices dropped to whispers of the chorus as Bloom took center stage. "My boyfriend Sky and I were an instant love story, and no doubts ever traveled around with us. For the Day of the Royals, I went to see him perform twenty specialist feats in a row. Swords, spears, fists, race, beasts, backflips, motorbike riding… one right after the other.

"So while I'm watching the show, I'm down in the audience's student section. My friends and I are watching, having a few gasps. I realize we've run out of food, so I go to the concessions to get some. I come back, open the door, and there's Sky's fiancee Diaspro, acting like the biggest Sky fan you've ever seen!"

Flash. "Well, I was in such a state of shock, I completely blacked out. I don't remember a thing. It wasn't until later, when the Royals of Eraklyon and Isis were chasing me that I even knew they were dead."

Bloom belted the chorus all on her own, the fire burning in her voice just as it had at Red Fountain that day. The other Winx girls offered backup vocals in a round. "They had it coming! They had it coming! They had it coming all along! I didn't do it, but if I'd done it. How could you tell me that I was wrong?"

The flames receded, replaced by a soft green glow as Flora's soft melody took over the song. "I loved Helia more than I could possibly say. He was a real artistic guy. Sensitive, a sketcher. But he was always trying to draw the human form, and on the way, he sketched Amaryl, Nova, Clarice, and Riven." She paused for the beat, showing off the drawing of a nude Riven in the shower. Riven looked blissfully unaware he was being depicted in art.

Flora winced, calling a vine towards her to demonstrate strangulation around her neck. "I guess you could say we broke up because of artistic differences. He saw himself as alive. And I saw him dead." She cocked her head to the side, pantomiming suffocation from the vine's grip.

For a split second, the music cut out. Then it came back, pushing to a boil Everyone locked in the jail was singing now. "The dirty bum, bum, bum, bum, bum! The dirty bum, bum, bum, bum, bum!

"They had it coming! They had it coming! They had it coming all along! 'Cause if they used us, and they abused us, how could you tell us that we were wrong?

"He had it coming. He had it coming. He only had himself to blame. If you'd have been there. If you'd have seen it. I betcha you would have done the same."

The chorus faded, replaced by the overlapping grumbling of each Winx girl. "You hide my wallet one more time-

"-single my brass-"

"-ten times-"

"-calibration error-"

"-that fiancee-"

"-artistic differences."

The music faded as each fairy laid back down on their cot. They went back to repeating the one word they had before.

"Shop."

"Witch."

"Kicks."

"Error."

"Diaspro."

"Sketches."

Clang! The guards opened the door to see what all the noise was about. "What's going on in there?"

Seeing nothing, they quickly left the girls alone again. Now the Winx had nothing but their anger and regrets to keep them company.

A/N's: This is not a serious fic. I haven't written for this fandom in YEARS. I literally just wanted to break my writer's block and try to put less pressure on myself as a writer. I wanted to get back to putting out fun works or works that might be kinda cheesy. That's what this is for.

Also: I sang along with these lyrics as I was writing. They should (mostly) fit the meter. Have fun, y'all!