Rated M for drug misuse, language and violence.
This story is set in January 1986, between Stranger Things Season 3 and 4.
Still Here.
Following the recurring disasters taking place in the once peaceful Hawkins, there has been a rise in depression and other mental disorders. However, this is 1986, and there is a lack of understanding on mental health-related issues, therefore people haven't been receiving proper treatment. And, because of this, there has been an increasingly high demand in drugs around town. Ecstasy, cannabis, crack-cocaine, you name it, someone will be selling it in Hawkins.
So with so many people around town trying these substances, they're not really hard to come across, so even the some of the gentlest of people have been struggling to hold back the temptation surrounding them, and with that, I'm onto the story.
Saturday, January 4th, 1986
Max Mayfield sits alone in her new trailer bedroom. Following her step-brothers death and her "Dad" walking out, she's had a lot on her mind. She's been distancing herself from her friends, not because she doesn't like them, but she really just needs to be alone for now. Forever maybe. Maybe not. Who knows? But for now, she's alone.
She takes out the diary given to her by the school counsellor, and begins to write.
January 4th 1986
Dear Diary. I still hate my life. I know hate is like, a strong word, but come on, you would hate it too if you were me. I haven't talked to the old gang in months, and I know I have myself to blame for that, and I know that. But no matter how bad I want it, something just stops me from speaking to them. Like, I just despise them, but I don't know why. it makes me sad sometimes, but it is what it is I guess...
They all seem to be doing well for themselves though. Dustin and Mike are acing High School, Lucas earned a place on the basketball team, and from what I've heard Will and El are enjoying life in California.
Maybe one day we could be friends again, but I don't know. Like, my brain's telling me to speak to them again, but my heart just won't let me.
I guess I'll just see what happens.
Her dog barks from outside, it needs feeding.
Max (voice raised): Coming...
She heads outside, past her drunken mother lying on the sofa. As she walks up to the dog he bounces up and down. She picks up the packet of dog food on the ground from earlier. She strokes the dog's head.
Max: Here you are buddy, I won't let you starve.
Max says, feeding the dog.
Max: Who's a good boy
She finishes feeding the dog, and follows with a rub on the head. Behind her there are a group of thugs not much older than her, "Stoners" if you like.
Stoner 1: Oh yeah, you guys'll never guess what I've got my hands on.
Stoner 2: What?
Stoner 1 takes off his hat and reveals a bag of blue pills.
Stoner 2: Jesus Christ.
Stoner 3 (laughing): Where the hell did you get a hold of them?
Stoner 1: Some guy over at the east-end of town. Denzel Cooper. He's selling them all over the town, making a fortune out of it too I'll tell you that.
Stoner 2: How much?
Stoner 1: it's a bag of 40.
Stoner 2: No, I mean how much did it cost you?
Stoner 1: 50 bucks.
$50 back then is the equivalent to $140.85 nowadays.
Stoner 3: Jesus Christ man, where the hell did you get that?
Stoner 1: My Dad pawned his wedding ring.
Stoner 3 (surprised): You're joking.
Stoner 2: I thought your Dad hated you getting stoned? Why would he pawn his wedding ring?
Stoner 1: Well he don't know he pawned it yet.
They all laugh.
Max is disgusted by the group and heads inside. "No class." she thinks to herself, as she climbs into bed for an early night.
As she lies in bed, she thinks to herself...
What does a pill really feel like, or weed? Someone had told her that weed can make you "taste colours", whatever that means. She's dead set on not trying drugs, Max had watched Quadrophenia, she knows that's not a good idea. Although, "I've not got anything to lose" she thinks to herself. "Have I?". "My friends?" "No, we haven't talked in months." Max tries to shake the thought, deep down she knows it's wrong. But when you're alone in your bed at night there isn't much to do but wonder. Well, there is, but there's nothing else I'd like to write about.
The name "Denzel Cooper" echoes in her head. If she did want to try something, all she needed to do was look up his name in the phonebook. Max had a bit of money saved up, in the Summer she was saving up for a crazy new skateboard she's seen in the Starcourt Mall, but obviously in the end that all went to shit, and nothing else had ever come up that made her want to spend her money. So there was about $30, nothing much but she could probably afford something small. "No!" Max screams in her head. She thinks of her Mother, if Max ever took some kind of reaction to the substances and lost her life, or became disabled in any way, how would her mother cope? She wouldn't. However, as the night goes on, Max just can't shake the thought, and by the morning, it was settled. She was going to give Denzel a call. Max was going to buy drugs.
Sunday, January 5th, 1986
Early in the morning, 6am, Max's alarm goes off. She wanted to make the call before her mother was awake, and from the way things were going, she did have until 11:30, but it's still better to be safe than sorry. She climbed out of bed, got dressed, then went to the telephone box at the end of the street. Max picks up the phonebook inside.
Max: Cooper, Cooper, Cooper.
Max scrolls through all the people with the surname Cooper in town.
Max: Jimmy, Sheldon, Bradley...
Max: Denzel.
She looks at the name, and the number next to it. She then puts a quarter into the machine and dials the number. The phone rings for a few seconds.
Denzel: Hello?
Max: Uh, hi... is this Denzel?
Denzel: Yeah, who's asking?
Max things of a fake name just to remain anonymous.
Max: My name's um, Jane. Jane Smith
Denzel: Jane Smith?
Max: Yeah.
Denzel: Sounds like a fake name.
Max: Hm?
Denzel: That sounds like a fake name.
Max: N-no, no it's not.
Denzel: Alright, "Jane", what do you want?
Max (now having second thoughts): I- um, I if I phoned you I could... buy something... "nice".
Denzel: "Nice" huh? You'll need to book in.
Max: Ok, um, I'll book in.
Denzel: Right, is 2:30am tomorrow good?
Max: Um, bit early, isn't it?
Denzel: Yeah well, would you rather we do this in broad daylight?
Max: Right, right, fair enough. 2:30's good.
Denzel: Great. So, how "nice" are we talking. Anything specific?
Max: No, nothing specific. I guess just something "nice" enough to not cost over $30?
Denzel: Oh. Well, I can do you a small bag. It could last you a few days.
Max: Oh, great thanks. Could you tell me what I'll get?
Denzel: Can't say over the phone. But just think of it as a really good Pick n' Mix.
Max: Got it, thanks.
Denzel: 308, Negra Arroyo lane. On the East side of Hawkins.
Denzel hangs up the phone. Max takes a deep breath and heads back home. When she walks inside she sees her mother, Susan, lying on the sofa just waking up.
Susan: Oh, morning Max. Where were you?
Max: Oh um, just at the shop.
Susan: What for?
Max: Milk. We ran out.
Susan: Oh, thanks, I'll give you the money for it.
Susan gets up from the sofa.
Susan: I'll just make some cereal.
Max: Oh um, I didn't get any.
Susan pauses for a second.
Susan: Why not?
Max: It was out of stock.
Susan: Oh, pity. I'll get some later.
For the rest of the day it was just an average depressing Saturday in Hawkins. Watching television, eating junk, sleeping, drinking. This is what Hawkins had become. A Slumville.
Monday, January 6th, 1986
It's 2am. Half an hour until the deal. Max's alarm goes off, but the sound is muffled by the blanket she wrapped round it so it doesn't wake her mother.
She gets up, and switches the alarm off. It's time. She gets dressed, picks up her Walkman, inserts her New Order: Low-Life tape and climbs out her bedroom window.
Max walks to the end of her street but then pauses, she sees two of the three stoners from yesterday, the ones she heard about Denzel from. They're crying, and high, or drunk. Well, she knows something's not right about them, asides from the crying. She keeps walking, but slower, and looking at the stoners. "What's up with them?" she thinks to herself. Then it hits her. "Oh fuck, is the other guy dead?" she thinks. It hits her, it's not definite, but she's pretty sure that's what happened. "Jesus." She continues to walk towards Denzel, but she has an uneasy feeling now. She's nervous. Her legs are weak. She has a feeling in her stomach like the one you'd get when you've been frightened, but it's frozen in time.
Max had never been out this late before, or early, however you look at it. The amount of drunks, stoners and gangs is unbelievable to her. She had no idea this is what her home looked like after hours. Her mind can't help but think back to the sight of those two young boys. She really hopes the third boy isn't dead, because stoner or not, that's someone's son. And yeah, some people do say "well they shouldn't have tried drugs then", but it's not really that simple. Some people are pressured to do it by friends, some people see it as the only way, and some people just see it as a part of life. Of course, you do still get people trying them just because they're stupid, but you just don't know. Also, people who try drugs aren't necessarily "bad people", if they aren't selling them, or hurting people to get their hands on them, they're really just on the wrong path. This is all Max can think about as she walks to Denzel's. "That guy's poor Mom."
Max stops in her tracks. "I can't do this."
But the problem is, she'd already booked the appointment. And she knows what these drug dealers are like, well, she doesn't actually, she's only seen the movies. And that's a bit of a problem, because she doesn't know what to expect. If she misses her appointment what will he do? "While he... mind?" "He will, I've made him wake up at 2am." "Oh shit." "Well, I gave him a fake name." "No but, can he track the phone call?" "Doesn't matter though, I used a phone box." "Jesus he could send people out looking for me, he knows my voice." "Fuck." Her mind races.
"I need to talk to someone."
There's only one person she knows who's up at this time. Steve. He's been trying to find a hobby, because he has everything else he wants in life, barring a girlfriend. He has money, he's in good-shape, he's happy with who he is, he just doesn't have anything to do with himself. So to keep life interesting, he's taken an interest in cars. Nowadays he stays up until around 3 working on his engine and spray paints and whatnot. So Max turns around and heads towards Steve's place.
When she arrives she sees a garage wide open and Steve inside using some sort of tool on his car, orange sparks are flying everywhere. She approaches not sure of what welcome she'll receive.
She waits patiently for Steve to finish with his tool. Once Steve is finished he takes off his goggles and turns around. He is surprised to see Max standing there, very surprised. He isn't sure if he's hallucinating from lack of sleep.
Steve (hesitant): Max?
Max: Hi.
Steve: Hi? Um, what are you doing here, it's nearly 3 in the morning. How do you even know where I live?
Max: You have the biggest house in town.
Steve: Right, yeah. So what are you doing here?
Max: I'm sorry um... I really need to talk to someone, and you're the only person I know who's up at this time.
Steve knows Max is going through a hard time so he tries to be understanding.
Steve: Oh, right. Um okay, sit down.
He pulls out a chair for her and takes a seat on his workbench.
Steve: What's on your mind?
Max explains the whole situation to him. She's not like herself. She's not brave, or confident about this. She's on the verge of tears. Steve does his best to make her feel safe, but he's not really good with this kind of thing.
Steve: Oh, Jesus. Uh, look, I'll sort it ok? You'll be alright.
Steve has no idea what he's going to do and has no idea if Max will be alright.
Steve: Look uh, you said you had an appointment with this guy. What if I go for you? I know I'll be late, but I can just give him a little extra, I'm sure he won't mind.
Max: I told him my name was Jane.
Steve: I could just tell him he misheard me and my name's John.
Max: Are... you sure?
Steve: Look Max, don't worry, I can handle this.
Max: What are you gonna do with the drugs?
Steve: I'll just pour them down the drain or something.
Max: Ok... Thanks.
Steve: Any time. Now look, you give me this guys address and head home ok? You've got school in a few hours.
Max: Yeah. Yeah, thanks.
Max gives Steve the details of the appointment and heads home. Steve was a little afraid himself, but he didn't show it. Since he came to realise how badly he treated people in his youth, he's done everything he can to make up for it, and most of the people around him have seen him change. They're forgiven him. But Steve just can't forgive himself.
Half an hour later Steve arrives at the address. He knocks on the door. Less than a minute later the door opens, standing there is a skinny man with glasses and a T-shirt that reads "Everything happens for a reason. The reason is Physics." This doesn't look like a drug dealer, this looks like a dumb kid who thinks Space Invaders counts as national service.
Steve: Um, hi, is Denzel in? Denzel Cooper.
Denzel: Correct.
Denzel sounds like your stereotypical nerd. All "Yes I love maths formulas and Beethoven." Like Lester from Grand Theft Auto.
Steve: Right. I um, I have an appointment.
Denzel: Jane Smith?
Steve: No, it's a- it's John Smith, you must have misheard me.
Denzel: Hm. You don't sound like the person I was talking to.
Steve: Well, has anyone else showed up?
Denzel pauses for a moment.
Denzel: Very well, come in.
Steve enters the house and follows Denzel through into his bedroom. It's filled with computers and Sci-Fi posters, the carpet is disgusting and the smell of outdated milk is in the air.
Steve: How old are you?
Denzel becomes immediately suspicious that Steve is a cop. He immediately begins to pat Steve down to make sure he isn't taping this whole deal or anything. Steve jumps away.
Steve: Woah. What the hell are you doing?
Steve begins to think this guy didn't want to be payed in cash.
Denzel: Why would you care how old I am?
Steve: You just, look young.
Denzel: Well for your information I'm 29. But I must make sure you're not recording this.
Denzel begins to pat Steve down again. While Steve is being searched he thinks about how weird this guy is. He clearly doesn't leave the house, he speaks like it's the 1886, and his room is disgusting.
Denzel: I see, all clear.
Steve: Yeah...
Denzel opens a bedside drawer and pulls out a little bag.
Denzel: One dope and pill pick n' mix. Thirty dollars.
Steve pulls the money from his pocket and hands it to Denzel. Denzel hands him the bag of cannabis.
Steve: Thanks.
Denzel: Pleasure doing business with you.
Steve nods, to him it was anything but a pleasure.
Denzel: Will I be seeing you again?
Steve: Uh, maybe.
Denzel: Good, good.
Steve leaves the house.
Steve (under his breath): Fuckin' freak.
About 10 hours later it's 12:15pm, and in Hawkins High School all the students are in class, all the students except Max. Max is in the school counsellor Ms. Kelly's office.
Ms. Kelly: Hi Max, it's good to see you again.
Max: Yeah, you too.
She fakes a smile.
Ms. Kelly: So did you have a good Christmas?
Max: Yeah, how was yours?
Ms. Kelly: Great, thank you for asking.
Max is uneasy. More uneasy than usual. She's fidgeting, her hands are sweaty, she feels hot and she can't look Ms. Kelly in the eye.
Ms. Kelly: Are you okay? You look a little nervous.
Max: Yeah. No. Sorry, I'm fine thanks.
Ms. Kelly: Alright, well just remember this is a safe space.
Max: Yeah, thanks.
They both stay quiet for a moment.
Ms. Kelly: So, have you been writing much in your diary?
Max: Uh, yeah, a bit.
Ms. Kelly: Good. Always remember, when you're struggling, just talk to someone. And if you can't talk to anyone, write about it. Anything's better than keeping it all bottled up.
The session goes on for another quarter-hour.
Monday, January 13th, 1986
A week has passed yet not much has changed in Hawkins. Most residents are depressed, druggies roam the streets at night, and Max is failing every subject in school. However, there is some excitement in the air. The schools "Golden Boy" Jason Carver is hosting a party. His home is huge and his parents are out of town all week so this is bound to be a wild one. And boy does everyone know it, word has spread so far that everyone knows about this party. Even the schools principle, and he for one was not going to have his students wasted on a Monday morning. There was an assembly held explaining the dangers of drug misuse and alcohol misuse, because although Jason never said anything about drugs or alcohol being, everyone knows what these kinds of parties are like. Especially considering the state Hawkins is in right now.
During lunch break, Max walks down the hall with her headphones on. "Life On Mars?" by David Bowie playing through them. She is tapped on the shoulder, Max turns around. It's Lucas.
Lucas: Hey Max?
Max: What.
She speaks to him coldly.
Lucas: I was just wondering if you were gonna be coming to Jason Carver's house party?
Max: No, I'm not.
She turns to walk away, Lucas grabs her shoulder.
Lucas: Wait, look, me and Jason are pretty good friends. And we'd be more than happy to have you there.
This is a lie, because at this point in time Lucas has been on the bench in all of his basketball games, and has hardly ever spoken to Jason. He was only invited because Jason considers himself "loyal" to the team. Not that it matters anyway, because most people showing up probably won't have an invite anyway. But who cares? Jason certainly doesn't.
Lucas: There'll be free booze, and snacks, and other things. Maybe some... shit?
Max: Shit?
Lucas: You know... like... Dope? Or Pills? We could have a great night.
Max: Lucas I don't care about your fucking pillhead party. I don't care about Jason. I don't care about drugs. And I don't care about you.
This was was really cold, even for Max, but she never betrays what she thinks. They both stand silently for a moment. Max then walks away.
Saturday, January 18th, 1986
It's 00:09am on the night of Jason's party. Max is sitting in her trailer, home alone. Her Mother is out clubbing, after claiming that she "isn't living life to the fullest". Max is watching Back To The Future on Video Cassette. The house phone begins the ring, Max gets out of her seat and answers.
Max: Hello?
?: mm- Max. Fucking love you.
Max: What?
?: I... Fucking Love... you.
It seems to be a very drunk Lucas. Or wasted. God, who knows, but he's definitely on something.
Max: Lucas?
Lucas: mm... mhm. Love you dude.
Max: What are you... what are you doing?
Lucas: Frickin' love you, cuh.
Max sighs, and hangs up the phone. She can tell Lucas isn't in his right mind, and she's sure whatever he's been doing ain't just alcohol. She pauses the video tape, and puts her jacket and shoes on. She is going to go and pick up Lucas before he does something he regrets. Thanks to Billy, she knows all too well what drink and drugs make people act like. Max might not like Lucas very much anymore, but she is not going to let him do this to himself. And at the end of the day, everyone knows this isn't him. Lucas only ever got involved with this crowd in a desperate attempt to become popular.
Max walks through the now uninviting streets, past all the alcoholics and glue-sniffers. There is glass bottles and plastic packaging everywhere. The weather isn't to pretty either, light drops of rain fall onto her hood.
After nearly 20 minutes of walking, she arrives at the Carver's house. Music is blaring and lights are blinding. She needn't knock, nobody else did. Max walks through the front door, welcomed by the site of two grown teenagers trying to sled down the stairs. She knows this won't end well, but she doesn't really care and walks through to the living room, where the action is happening. It's the biggest living room she's ever seen, about 3 times the size of her trailer. Yet it's still crammed with wasted teenagers. As she squeezes through the crowd she sees a few familiar faces. And the last faces she expected. Mike? Dustin? Nancy? Steve? Max is shocked to see these guys, I mean it's one thing being at this party but, they all look so... pissed. Seriously, Dustin and Mike were the nerdiest people she'd ever met, Nancy always seemed quite reserved, and Steve? Well, she could see that, but she thought he was passed those days. Guess not.
In reality, on the way home from that drug deal with Denzel, Steve had actually tried some of the substances he'd bought, and he was hooked. Since then, he's been trying it all.
As Max continues through the crowd, she ends up in the kitchen, to find Lucas chatting up some other girl. She's a little hurt by this, but fair enough, they broke up, Lucas can talk to whoever he likes. But not tonight, Max is taking him home.
Max: Lucas.
Lucas: Oh! Max,
Max: Come on man, I'm taking you home.
Max grabs him by the arm and tries to get him to leave.
Lucas: No. No.
Max: Come on Lucas, you're drunk, or high, or... something.
The girl Lucas was talking to steps in.
Girl: Hey! Fuck off he's mine.
Max: I'm not his girlfriend, I'm just walking him home.
Girl (yelling): Fuck Off!
The girl punches Max in the face, bursting her nose. Max holds her nose, trying to stop the blood from flowing. She stands, shocked.
Lucas: Yeah, fuck off.
These words hit Max harder than any punch could. Sure, Lucas is wrecked and this isn't something he would normally say, but man, that one ripped straight through Max's heart.
They are all silent for a moment.
Max: Fine then. Enjoy your fucking party.
Max storms off back through the crowd and out the front door. Her heart is broken and her blood is boiling. She was only trying to help, man.
She walks back home through the depressing streets and the now pouring rain, blood still running from her nose, but she doesn't care anymore. Tonight has changed her perspective of life, she's done with love, and parties, and friends and all the other bullshit. As Max is walking home she sees a red haired girl who looks just like her, and she's standing outside Denzel Cooper's house. Max just looks the other way and keeps walking.
Months pass and Hawkins continues its downward spiral. Word has it there was a stabbing at that party. Two drunks got in a fight about relationships or something. One of the girls was called Chrissy, she was the most popular girl in school, and Jason's girlfriend. She was stabbed in the throat and died instantly. Another blow for an already grieving community.
Vecna, who would've went on a killing spree ripped Hawkins apart as he did in Season 4, decided that watching Hawkins destroy themselves is far more amusing than his original plan.
On April 11th 1987, Dustin Henderson and Mike Wheeler were attempting to smoke cannabis in an abandoned warehouse. However, what they didn't know was that there had been a gas leak in the building, and as soon as they lit that cigarette, the whole building went up in flames. Dustin died in a matter of seconds and his body was burned beyond recognition. Mike managed to survive the initial fire, but spent the next few weeks comatose. On May 1st 1987, he was pronounced dead.
Steve Harrington continued to struggle with his addictions, and they only got worse. The alcohol more than anything else. On July 14th 1995 he was killed in a car crash due to driving under the influence of alcohol. He was cruising along the highway at 75mph, and meant to turn in to the lane next to him. However, due to his lack of coordination he rotated the steering wheel too much and spun out of control. The lorry behind him? El smacko.
On November 11th 1999 Nancy Wheeler and Robyn Buckley moved to England. They'd had enough of life in Hawkins, and watching everyone throw their lives away or get themselves killed. They wanted to enter the coming Millennium with a fresh start.
On March 16th 2002 Max's mother Susan passed away due to heart complications caused by her now lavish lifestyle.
February 3rd 2024
38 years have passed since that awful party, yet Max still leads a somewhat identical life. Luckily, she managed to move out of her dreadful trailer in the late 90's, and now lives in a home in one of the nicer areas of Hawkins. While cleaning up one day she finds her old diary from so long ago. She opens it, and reads through all those chapters of her teenage years. Then, she gets to the end, and sees that there is still one empty page. She grabs a pen, and begins to write.
February 3rd 2024
Dear Diary, been a while, huh? I don't know why I'm writing in here to be honest, but I guess you could use a little update. The world has changed a lot since I last wrote in here, including Hawkins. Is it better or worse? Well, most people would say worse, but I'd have to disagree. Usually, people look back at the 80's a time for being carefree and having fun, but everyone always overlooks the bad bits. Drugs aren't half as easy to get now as they were back then, and there are far less kids doing drugs and whatnot, despite what the internet tells you. Oh yeah, the internet is a new thing. It's like, imagine a huge newspaper, on your television, that anyone could write in. Actually, that's a terrible explanation, but I guess it doesn't really matter.
Anyway, since the last time I wrote here, my friends have all gone. Steve, Mike and Dustin all passed away, Robyn and Nancy emigrated to Britain, and Will and El still live in California. i haven't spoken to any of the people in about 24 years now. And, I can't lie, I'm partially to blame for losing Steve. One night, he did me a huge favour, which led to him losing his life a few years down the line. But I know if he hadn't helped me that night, it would be him that was still with us, and not me, I owe him my life for that.
And I know it's pretty rich to call them my "friends" considering how I used to write about them, but they've always had a special place in my heart, and they always will.
But I do have some good news, in 2008 I had a little girl, her name is Lily. She's beautiful, and she's definitely a better kid than I ever was. Her Dad never stuck around, but that's ok, he was a dick anyways. It's just me and Lily, partners in crime.
Oh yeah, I know I mentioned earlier that everyone from my old life is gone, but Jason Carver is still around. And he's nothing like he used to be, back then he was all aggressive and boisterous, but now he's pretty gentle. All classy and polite. I never thought I'd say it, but he's actually a nice guy. I used to blame him for all my problems, mainly my friends' addictions, and God did I let him know it. But as I got older I accepted the truth. Everyone is responsible for their own actions.
It's weird really, I never thought my life would turn out this way. My friends are all gone, and the world is nothing like it used to be. But Jason's still here.
And I am too.