Exception

By: Aviantei

63. I Swear There's Thematic Resonance Here

It took Ivy an understandably long time to wrap her head around what Alma was saying, mostly because it seemed to clash spectacularly with everything she'd experienced so far that day. Alma had been nothing but supportive of Ivy and Kanda as a couple, and they even had just said that they were glad that Kanda had someone like her around, so Ivy was feeling like she'd just been hit with the most extreme of mixed signals possible.

Once the initial shock wore off, though, she transitioned into no-nonsense business mode. Minomasu Ivy was not a fan of leaving misunderstandings out to fester, and she wasn't about to let this conversation became an exception.

"When you say you love him—"

"Romantically, yes." It seemed that, for all their bubbly attitude, Alma was just as capable as being frank as Kanda and Ivy alike—or maybe it was because of his honest nature that was the case? In either event, they offered a smile, despite Ivy's eyes narrowing on instinct. She hadn't even noticed her response, otherwise she would've fixed it right away. "You don't need to worry. I'm not going to do anything to get in your way. I love him, yeah, but that doesn't mean I want to steal him away. Not whenever he looks so happy with you." Which, when it came to one Kanda Yū, meant that his resting bitch face became a little less severe, but both present parties knew that already, so there was no need to bring it up.

Which begged the question: "If that's the case, then why even bring it up at all?"

Alma puckered their lips for a moment in thought. "Well, you're smart, yeah, Ivy-chan? I figured that you'd eventually notice. So I figured it was way better to be up front about it than to make you worry more than necessary." Their expression became apologetic. "Sorry, was that wrong? I mean, I can't take it back or anything, but it's still right to apologize."

"Since I haven't experienced the alternative, I can't say which I would've preferred, so…" Ivy sighed, running a hand through her hair.

"I guess it's just a lot to process no matter which way you learn about it, huh?"

You got that right. Maybe it was because Ivy had gotten her full burst of panic out of the way earlier, but she wasn't necessarily worried. She couldn't tell if picking the situation apart logically instead was better or worse, though. Ivy pressed her palms together and gestured to Alma with her fingertips. "Okay, so you love him—" and though she'd said it herself, just repeating the phrase was enough to make Ivy feel a little bit self-conscious "—why are you going around telling me this instead of him?" Because if Kanda knew, then Ivy was fairly confident he would've mentioned it at least once.

Alma continued to smile, but it was almost a sad thing, and Ivy couldn't ignore the ping that raced through her chest at that. "Because I'm stable now, sure, but there's a chance that that's going to change any day," they said, and Ivy was reminded with stark clarity that they were still in Alma's hospital room. "Yū deserves better than being tied to someone that's tied to an IV drip just to keep existing."

"You—" —don't get to decide that for him, was what Ivy wanted to say, but she didn't. For starters, it wasn't any of her business what Alma said and felt, either.

"Sorry, though, I was trying to help, but I think I just complicated things." The worst part of it was that Ivy couldn't even bring herself to be mad about it, not whenever it was clear that Alma had no ill intent whatsoever. Everything that she was feeling in the moment, with all her feelings getting stirred up worse than confetti in the wind, were hers to deal with, not theirs. "But like I said, I don't intend to get in your way or anything cliché like that, so please don't worry. I just want Yū to be happy, that's more than enough for—"

"Stop it." Ivy had meant for the words to come out with much more of an edge to them, but instead she sounded far more desperate than she intended. "You don't have to make yourself say something like that. Just watching from the sidelines to make sure he's happy is enough? That sounds like a bunch of bullshit to me." Maybe it was because she was selfish at her core, but Ivy didn't think she'd ever be able to feel that way, nor did she trust that anyone else could.

If you've accepted that's as much as you're going to get, that's fine, but don't try and gaslight yourself into pretending that being okay with it is something noble to go ahead and do.

Get mad, dammit! Your situation sucks! It's okay to think that! It's okay to fight against it! Even if winning isn't possible, you don't have to pretend to be some saint! I'd much rather you blame me for getting in your way than—than—whatever the hell this is!

Alma's mind was already reeling from having someone call them out in such a way, but they still made themself laugh. "See, Ivy-chan? I told you you were smart enough to figure it out."

Ivy, on the other hand, was already long past any point of keeping her patience intact, and thus she had no intention of even entertaining the compliment shed been delivered. "Have you ever told him how you've felt?" she asked without any sense of mercy. Alma looked away, which was answer enough. "Look, I know it's rough. You heard the whole story; even I didn't think there was a chance that Kanda would like me. But I think you owe it to yourself to at least say something instead of letting those feelings fester around inside you. So I'm giving you permission."

On a base, teenage girl level, Ivy kind of hated the idea of letting someone else confess to her boyfriend. In fact, were it anyone else, she wouldn't have let them even try. But Alma deserved was already going through enough, so what would it hurt besides Ivy's pride to let them try? If nothing else, the two of them were friends now, even if it was in the loosest of senses, so she wasn't the type to let a friend sit there and suffer on the sidelines, just to let herself and Kanda be happy.

Alma blinked, not having expecting that sort of response whatsoever. Maybe they'd been reading too many love triangle Webtoons or something, but the idea of a peaceful reaction hadn't ever crossed their mind. Sure, they couldn't see all of Ivy's internal thoughts on the matter, but they were pretty sure most people wouldn't react that way upon such a revelation.

"Do you just want to sit there with that feeling hanging over you the rest of your life?" Ivy asked whenever it seemed that Alma's mouth wasn't about to start working anytime soon. "All you've been doing is imagining Yū-kun's response, instead of seeing what he'd actually say. And, yeah, the timing of him dating me is kinda shitty, I'm not gonna say it isn't, but better now than never or something?" She scowled, hating how uncertain she felt about what she was saying, but it wasn't like she could just stop now. "Alma-san, listen: I know that high school relationships don't always pan out, and I can't predict the future. But right now I have every intention of staying with Yū-kun as long as possible, so don't just go imagining some future possibility where we break up and you can sweep in or something."

It was the first time Ivy had put it into words, but it was the truth. She liked Kanda, more than enough to want to stay by his side long into the future, whether that meant college or afterwards. Kanda made her feel safe and stable in a way she couldn't remember ever feeling, and that was worth so much to her. He was her place to breathe, the anchor that kept her steady in the sea of life. And maybe that was a bit overdramatic considering they'd been dating for the span of a few scant months, but it was still the truth of how she felt, and fuck anyone who wanted to dismiss that.

Alma had no intention of dismissing those feelings, though they still couldn't help but let out a chuckle. "You're kinda fearless, aren't you, Ivy-chan?"

"Not even close." There were so many things she was afraid of, so many things she hadn't been able to bring herself to admit, even to Kanda. "Right now, I'm scared, too. Because what if there's a chance he's willing to choose you over me?" She could've been overthinking, yes, but there was no denying the possibility. "But if something like that's going to happen, I think I'd rather know about it sooner rather than later, you know?" Considering that the big life milestone of graduating high school was coming up and there were decisions to be made on that front, Ivy didn't want to push forward with the plan that had been silently forming in her mind if it wasn't going to pan out.

It was kind of a selfish motivation, sure, but Ivy had never claimed that she was anything else.

"You have a point," Alma said, though they chose not to admit that seeing Ivy's own resolve just seemed like all the more reason to never say a thing. "But saying it today feels kinda wrong. I…I promise I'll do it soon, but I need a little time to prepare myself."

"That's fine." Ivy honestly needed a little time to prepare herself, too. "But I'd really appreciate it if you took care of it soon. If you chicken out on telling Yū-kun, then it's just gonna make a bigger mess for all of us."

Alma smiled, recognizing that fact more than anyone else. "Don't worry, Ivy-chan. I'll keep that in mind."

And while such hesitance seemed to just be begging for Kanda to show up at the perfect moment for dramatic effect, our resident grump had chosen to take the longest possible route to pick up drinks so that Ivy and Alma would have some time to get to know each other better without him in the way. As such, upon his return, the rest of the visit went smoothly, and they had delightful rest of the afternoon until the couple started to head home.

It was a quiet drive, as per usual, and Kanda was feeling pleased that his oldest friend and his girlfriend seemed to be getting along. Meanwhile, Ivy was thoughtful, but it wasn't even about what she and Alma had discussed. No, she'd shared her thoughts on the matter, and it was just unfair to view Alma as a threat. Instead, she was thinking about another matter, something she hadn't let herself ruminate on since she'd moved.

It's been a while since we saw each other. I wonder how…

Old friends, in case you hadn't guessed, just happened to be the theme of these couple of chapters.

While Ivy and Kanda were off having their own adventures, one Allen Walker was in the middle of trying to do his best to have a relaxing spring break—a fact that was rather impeded by the presence of one surly guardian also being out and about the house.

The relationship between Cross Marian and Allen Walker could be considered a strained one by the most generous of observers. One the one hand, Cross had taken Allen in whenever he'd lost his previous guardian and had nowhere else to go. On the other hand, Cross was complete and utter trash at being even remotely guardian-like, and that lead to an extensive number of complications, such as Allen having to get his shit together to care for himself at a young age. In fact, Allen was quite of the opinion that not having Cross around made his life easier.

There was no need to skulk around his own house just to avoid the man! There was no putting up with empty alcohol vessels scattered everywhere! Sure, on occasion there was chasing off a debt collector with the insistence that Allen had no idea where Cross was (and that baby face sure did him wonders in that regard), but the man could keep the lights on from anywhere in the world, so it really was for the best whenever he was gone!

Which was why Allen was taking his morning without Cross in the house as the blessing it was. There was still plenty of the man's stuff out and about to indicate that he wasn't permanently gone, but his car hadn't been in the garage since Allen had woken up, so that seemed like an excellent opportunity to unwind, take his time cooking a massive tower of breakfast foods, and share the whole thing with Timcanpy, who was more than excited to have Allen home every day, even if he didn't quite understand what was going on. All the doggo needed to be happy was Allen and food, and considering that they both had matching infinite stomachs, they were a perfect match in every possible way.

Whenever that task was done and Allen felt satisfactorily convinced that Cross wasn't about to come home any time soon, Allen set about lounging about the living room without a care in the world. Usually he'd indulge in some hobby or another, but it was a rare day off without Cross nearby, so he allowed himself the pure bliss of doing nothing while you had nothing to do, and he'd dozed off into a peaceful half sleep with Timcanpy doing the same upon his chest. Stuffing yourself silly tended to lull you into sleep, after all, infinite stomachs or no.

In the back corner of his mind, Allen had potentially imagined waking up to the afternoon sun and taking Timcanpy outside to relax (he had a little bird harness and everything!). After all, that activity meant that he wouldn't be subject to the moment Cross returned home and made a mess around the house, and then he'd know what to expect whenever he eventually made it home for the evening. Such fantasies might've even slipped into our beloved Brit's dreams, bringing his day to peak slice of life energy.

Instead, Allen woke up to the door slamming open with such force that one might suspect a break-in. Even Cross in his worst of drunken moods didn't make entrances like that, and boy and bird alike were instantly bolted awake. It took a few seconds for Allen's groggy mind to catch up with the situation, and he blanched at the same exact time as Timcanpy took off in a blur of golden feather racing to the front door in excitement.

Well, Allen thought, I guess I should count myself grateful that I even got half a day of peace this break. Because he certainly wasn't about to get any more from that moment on, guaranteed. Not whenever the sound of the ruckus from the doorway was growing closer and closer to the living room, one stomping step at a time.

"Oh, Allen, you are home!" Elizabeth said upon spotting him, and he promptly threw all the bags in his arms to the ground in one haphazard pile of luggage to hug the brit on the couch, crushing the poor boy in the process, causing Allen to regret not having composed a will. With everything he'd gone through in his life up to that point, one would think that he'd have gotten on that already, but no dice.. Timcanpy flew in an excited circle around Elizabeth's bags for a moment before alighting on Elizabeth's back. "I'm super excited to see you. It's been ages."

"It's good to see you," Allen wheezed out, ever polite to a fault. "I thought you were still in India?"

"I went to Africa, actually, but I figured it was time I stopped by and checked in." Satisfied with the force of his hugs (for the time being), Elizabeth gave Allen back the ability to breathe and plopped down on one of the couch cushions proper, Timcanpy alighting back down on the pig-tailed man's back. With his dark hair, glasses, and general distain for all things conceived of as a stable gender, Elizabeth seemed to have chosen a style for the day that wouldn't have looked out of place on some Kpop idol or another. "'Sides, Cross said he was coming back, and I thought it would be cruel and unusual punishment to make you deal with him all on your lonesome."

Despite the force of the greeting, Allen could admit a small sense of relief at Elizabeth's presence. Having both been pseudo-raised by Cross, the two had traveled with each other for years, and as such had a sibling-like relationship, with the sibling part there to emphasize how Elizabeth could feel like a brother one day, a sister the next, and just fuck-all to the labels, let them care about Allen, dammit. And while Elizabeth was a chaos gremlin at his best, it was always better to have someone around to distract Cross's attention from you than not.

"Are you gonna be around for a while, then?" Allen asked, trying to brace his overall sanity for the outcome. Living with Elizabeth and Cross was a special skill that not many could master, and if he was going to be playing the long game, Allen needed to plan accordingly.

Elizabeth hummed, looking to the ceiling as if it would hold all the answers to the universe. "You know me, I don't like planning much. Though if I could, I'd at least like to hang around for a few months. 'Til summer, probs?" At this point, that was at least two and a half months. Not the worst, but still in need of some ample mental preparedness. Elizabeth shrugged. "It's not something I'm gonna say for certain, but you know how it goes." Allen nodded, more than used to Elizabeth's whims—which was why he wasn't surprised whenever the man stood up and stretched. "Man, those overseas flights are brutal. I'm gonna go take a nap. Wake me up whenever dinner's ready…" And he let to wander upstairs…

"At least pretend that you're going to take your bags with you, Eli!"

…leaving just the first of many messes in his wake.

[Author's Notes]

Whoops, more complicated romantic situations. Also: Elizabeth, who was originally a character of a friend who I'm no longer in contact with. Unlike with Ari, who debuted in person, Elizabeth was just name-dropped, so I completely revamped his character concept and went with this. This is clearly the enby/agender arc for Exception, and I have no regrets.

Also: happy February! Somehow I'm three days into the month and already overwhelmed. I would like to retreat back to being a hermit for the rest of winter, please and thank.

Next Time: "64. How to Get Revenge: Soccer." Please look forward to it!

-Avi

[3 Fenbuary 2024]