Swinging her legs, Angie waited in the chair outside the office and fiddled with the visitor lanyard.
A shadow accompanied by large booted feet passed in front of her, slowing slightly before stopping in front of the door.
The nine year old tracked up from the boots until she was craning her chin back to see a huge man standing there, looking down at her with a frown. His arms were thick, he was tall, broad shouldered, stern faced and had next to no emotion in his steely eyes.
Ice washed through her and Angie quickly looked away, heart pounding.
The first thought that entered her head when he opened the office door and walked in was that she wasn't sure what would be worse at this point; If this was her dad and he wanted her, or if this was her dad and he didn't want her.
If he did, she would end up with a complete stranger who was immensely scary and if he didn't she would end up with her uncle, another near complete stranger that her mother had been adamant she should never be alone with because he was a bad man who hurt people and got away with it.
Still, given the options and that her mom had been in the midst of trying to track this man down before she died, Angie figured he had to be the better of the two options.
That was a small consolation and Angie bit her lips, swinging her feet.
If he fell through, there was always option three. She tapped her backpack with her toe, reassuring herself she still had everything for her plan if this didn't go well.
From where she sat she could hear some of what was being said in the office, but only if she really strained her ears.
Turning and peeking over the edge of the window of the door, she tried to catch a glimpse of her social worker and this man, 'Scott Carter' , who was likely her dad.
He didn't look happy and Angie's heart sank with stinging disappointment. Of course. Why had she expected anything else? Ronda had warned her this could happen.
"Even if she is mine, what the fuck am I supposed to do with the kid!? I'm not exactly set up to take care of a child!" He's voice raised a little as he splayed his hands in frustration. "Doesn't she have anyone else?"
"The only other option besides foster care is an aunt and uncle."
Angie's stomach dropped. No. Not Uncle Curt. Mommy said he was a bad guy and had bad friends. That's why she was never allowed to go for sleepovers with her cousins!
"Well, why doesn't he take her then! Surely that's a better option!"
Ronda pursed her lips and put a hand on her hip. Angie prayed she wouldn't give up yet.
"Well, I guess it's starting to look like the only option, but they already have eight kids and I have concerns that Angie's needs won't be met there."
"I might not even be her father!"
"Are you willing to consider doing a paternity test?" The man behind the big desk asked quietly.
"What difference would it make? My life is not set up for a child, Blackburn! She'd be miserable with me! What would I even do with her when I have to deploy?"
Exhausted, Angie slumped down from the edge of the window and stared at her dirty old shoes.
She didn't want to hear anymore and that familiar feeling of going completely numb set in.
He didn't want her and she was doomed to foster care or living with her Uncle. Neither sat well with her. Even at her young, tender age, she'd heard stories from kids at her school who were in foster care.
Frustration and anger started to bubbled up, and Angie suddenly decided there was only one place in the world she wanted to be, and that place was definitely not with adults all trying to pass her off as some broken inconvenience.
She needed to get out of here, but how could she slip off a military base without being seen?
One step at a time, she supposed. She wouldn't know till she tried.
Slipping off the chair and picking up her backpack, Angie tucked out of the line of sight Ronda would have had if she looked her way and headed down the quiet hall.
Passerby's didn't give her too much mind. Curious glances, but mostly they were all so busy with their own thing and she walked with enough pretend confidence that they didn't bother with her.
When she approached the doors they'd come in from the parking lot, Angie squared her shoulders and acted like she was supposed to be there.
"Hey! Kid." A young man in uniform stopped her. "Where are you going? Why aren't you with someone?"
Pretending it was all just a game, Angie looked him dead in the eye and lied, "My Aunt Ronda asked me to go wait in the car. She's having a discussion that I'm not supposed to hear with someone else."
He narrowed his eyes, studying her suspiciously. She could see him debating if he wanted to play babysitter or not. The grimace told Angie a great deal and she felt hope bloom in her chest.
"Alright, but go straight there. No detours."
Heart singing, Angie gave him a sweet smile and said, "Thanks! I will!"
She could feel him watching her from the doors as she crossed the parking lot so she slipped between the vehicles until she was blocked by a few bigger trucks.
Opportunity knocked moments later.
A group of people were heading out in the lot, talking and completely oblivious to her as she slipped silently around the cars and trucks.
One of them unlocked the black truck three feet from her. It even had a storage box in the back she could slip under to hide!
Pulse thundering in her own ears, she peeked over the truck and saw the men examining another man's car, laughing and teasing him about something.
Yes! Luck was with her!
Standing on her tippy toes, she tossed her bag in and used the back tire to climb over the edge of the box and slipped under the storage at the front of the truck bed.
All that was left to do was wait for him to leave! Then she could just slip out again and figure out where the nearest bus station was.
"Look. I'll take the test, but I can't promise what my answer will be if it turns out she's mine." Metal stated shortly, mind still reeling with the news that he might have a kid and that said kid's mother was dead, leaving him as her only living parent.
"Alright. Thank you. That's all I ask." Ronda looked a little too relieved and smug, like she'd caught him and he just didn't know it yet.
Hell. She was probably right. If the kid was his…shit…how could he not take responsibility for her? What kind of an asshole would he be if he gave her up to foster care? Still, the Uncle was an option…she'd have a family she deserved-
The smile on Ronda's face fell when she looked at the office door.
"Oh, you have got to be kidding me!" She stalked across the room, heels clicking and hauled open the door, head craning round the corner to the chair outside it. "She's gone."
"What the hell do you mean 'she's gone'?!" Metal growled, looking for the little girl with dark, honey colored curls, big brown eyes and freckles that had been sitting outside when he walked in here fifteen minutes ago.
"I mean, that she's not where I left her!" Ronda sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose.
"Is the kid prone to wandering off like that?" Blackburn asked as he picked his phone to alert security.
"No. She's a really good kid! I've never had any problems with her, but grief affects them all in different ways. She could have been hiding things from me." Ronda said, looking up and down the hall, worried.
The simple sentence twisted a knife deep into Metal's gut and he shoved the guilt away. Not his problem, probably not even his kid…probably…right? Still, kid had just lost her mom.
Catherine Thatcher. He definitely remembered her mom. Nine years ago she was probably one of the few he'd ever been willing to take a chance with in a real life together, but she'd up and left suddenly. Maybe this was why. Had she not wanted him part of his own kid's life or had she thought he wasn't interested in raising one?
Truth be told he hadn't been interested back then. Didn't mean he wouldn't have tried though.
"Alright, thank you. You said Master Chief Hayes's truck? No. That's not necessary. We'll handle it." Blackburn hung up the phone and exhaled sharply. "You aren't going to believe this, but security footage shows that Angie stowed away off base in the back box of Jason's truck about ten minutes ago."
"What!?" Ronda squawked. "You have got to be kidding me!"
"How in the hell did no one see her and stop her?!" Metal asked, incredulous and amazed all at once. Maybe it was his kid after all.
"Bets me, but it's a security breach and there will be an investigation. You can be sure some heads will be rolling on this one." Eric said seriously as he started calling Jason.
Waiting anxiously, Angie lay very still as the driver of the truck got out and made his way across a plaza. She had never been so terrified in her entire life, but playing it like a game was helping. She pretended she was a secret ninja princess on a special mission. She wasn't afraid of anything and nothing could hurt her.
Slowly, inch by inch she slithered out from the suffocating tight space between the truck bed and the storage book and peeked over the edge.
He was far enough away now, with his back to her and answering a call on his phone as he walked.
Wasting no time, Angie flung herself over the side of the truck and lowered herself until her feet were dangling a little off the ground before letting go.
"Say that again!?" The man had stopped, turning around suddenly and looking at the truck.
Insides freezing, Angie ducked down, using the vehicles to hide her as she edged around between a line of cars.
"How the hell did she even get that far without someone stopping her!?" The man's voice was sharp as he approached, still talking into his phone. "What's her name? Angie Thatcher. Got it."
He was talking about her.
Panic rose in her gut and Angie gasped a little, trying to think of a way out before he found her and dragged her back.
He was bigger, so she couldn't run. She couldn't hide out here unless she climbed into the back of another truck and there weren't any close enough. Besides, she couldn't get up and in without being seen. She could hide under a car instead, but what if it drove away and she got squished.
Then another idea sprang into her head.
They weren't the only ones out here. It was a mall parking lot. People were coming and going at the height of the busy hour. The man had never seen her before. Maybe if she pretended to belong with another family he wouldn't figure it out!
She was already two rows away from the man's vehicle. He was checking the back of his truck now, then under it and scanning the parking lot.
Spying a large family heading into the mall, Angie slipped between two more rows of cars and trailed behind, walking close enough to the group that she hopefully looked like she belonged.
Sweat poured down her back and she struggled to keep her breathing steady as she silently prayed that she would make it inside.
It worked right up until they reached the doors and she couldn't resist looking back over her shoulder.
He was watching her. Even with the sunglasses on, Angie knew. He was still talking into his phone when he started moving, walking briskly in her direction the second she looked at him.
Heart in her throat, Angie ducked inside the doors.
Somewhere to hide. She needed somewhere to hide. Where could she-
There! Mattresses, couches, all kinds of furniture.
This was ok. This was just a game. Hide and seek. That was all it was. Just a game of hide and seek with her friends and not a big scary man. She was ok.
Attaching herself to another couple when she entered the store, Angie got inside without any questions.
She stole along the isles until she found the perfect spot, then, when no one was looking, she slipped underneath a low bed frame, hugging her backpack to her chest.
Then she waited.
And waited. And waited, all the while playing her games and pretending she was brave.
By the time thirty minutes rolled around, Angie had counted sixteen pairs of feet walking past her hiding spot and only three looked like they could have been the man's.
Angie decided it was time to venture out.
The next part of her plan required getting to a bus station, but she didn't know which one yet and she needed wifi to look it up on her tablet.
Momma always said a coffee shop and a bookstore were a girl's best friend, so Angie couldn't think of anywhere else to go. They usually had free wifi, right? At any rate, her mother used to let her run wild around bookstores with cafes attached all the time. No one would question a random child in the kids section.
She just needed to get there without being caught.
Leaving the store while trailing behind an older woman, Angie scanned the large, busy halls as she hunted for a bookstore.
She flinched whenever someone of similar build to he man caught her eye, paranoid at every lingering glance, but the whole way to the bookstore, she never saw him. Once she thought she spotted a big, barrel-chested muscle-biker-gang type of guy do a double take and start texting, but he didn't approach her and walked the opposite way.
Once inside the comforting aroma of new books, coffee and plush stuffed animals, Angie made herself inconspicuous in the children's section and pulled out her tablet.
By now her hands were shaking and she could hardly type in the passcode. It took three tries, but she got it.
Mind going blank at the sight of the back screen picture, Angie swallowed a painful lump in her throat.
It was her and her mom at the cabin by the lake. That was their favorite place.
And that was where Angie needed to go, because maybe if she got there a part of her mom would still be there and then the world would make sense again.
She just had to get there. She was committed now. She'd never caused so much trouble before. She'd run away. She'd lied, stowed away, snuck off a military base (she left the lanyard in the parking lot, so she couldn't add stealing to the list yet).
People were looking for her.
Determination flared.
All the more reason to get to the cabin. She would be safe there. Then…then maybe she could figure out what she would do next.
Connecting to the wifi, Angie searched google for the nearest bus station, then cost of a train ticket, and finally directions to the cabin.
"Going somewhere?" A deep, gravely voice asked from right next to her.
Angie squeaked, jumping so badly that she nearly dropped the tablet and smacked her head a little on the edge of the bookshelf she was resting her back against. She'd been so absorbed in her task and exhausted already from her adventure that she never noticed the approach of the giant man now within arms reach of her.
At first she expected it to be the man from the parking lot. Instead, crouched down, but still managing to tower over her, was Scott Carter. The man who didn't want her. The man who her mom was adamant about being her father.
Angie swallowed thickly as she stared, wild eyed at the face of the other, shock holding her still.
He was unreadable. Mouth set in a firm line, eyes hard and intense, massive forearms resting on his knees as he loosely clasped both hands together in front of him.
"Ronda is pretty upset," He stated in a gruff voice as he studied her. "Best we get you back to her."
Ronda. Social worker.
Angie looked away instantly and down at the tablet in her hands.
Ronda was going to take her to her uncle's or to foster care.
No! Oh, no she wasn't! She couldn't let that happen. Mommy said he was a bad man and to stay away from him and she wasn't going to live with strangers who would hurt her! Kelly said it was bad!
No.
She was going to the cabin. Mommy would be there…somehow, someway. She promised she would always be there!
Angie put the tablet in her bag and got up, hoisting her backpack on and ignoring the man crouching next to her as much as she dared.
She just needed to get to the cabin. Everything would be ok then.
Scott rose to his full height too, folding his arms across his chest as he watched her.
Judging the distance to the door, Angie started walking away.
"Where do you think-?" A hand grabbed the handle of her backpack, dragging her backwards again with surprising gentleness. "Seriously? Get back here!"
Fear and numbness closed her throat. She wanted to scream bloody murder, but couldn't manage to release a sound.
"She still trying to run?" The man whose truck she'd stowed away in was back, blocking off the mouth of the isle she'd been hiding in.
"Uh huh," Scott still hadn't let go of her backpack.
"ANGIE!" Ronda came around the corner, heels clipping along in a frantic staccato. "What were you thinking!? What are you doing!?"
This was all wrong. It had been for weeks.
The smell of the books, the coffee, the murmur of voices, that was all perfect, except the one voice she wanted wasn't there.
There was no way to put that in words. How could she? They wouldn't understand something she couldn't fathom herself!
All she knew was that she hurt. Her heart hurt. Her head hurt. Her chest HURT. Wait, when did she stop breathing?
"Metal…she's getting pretty white-"
That was muffled. There was a rushing sound in her ears and her vision started to go funny as she stared at the floor. Why was she so cold?
Her vision went dark, followed by her knees crumpling under her. The oblivion stretching out before her was welcoming. Maybe this was better. Maybe if she just stopped then nothing would hurt anymore.
"Angie! Hey! Come on, honey…wake up!" Someone was shaking her. Tapping her face. "Scotty, get her feet up a little more. Ronda, does she have any water in that bag of hers?"
She groaned and then whimpered when she couldn't lift her arms to push the hands away.
Coming back was worse than going. She was cold and clammy. Her head throbbed and she felt sick to her stomach.
"Angie? Can you hear me?"
"Jason! Hey! Did you find- Wow…what happened?"
"Trent! Good. She passed out on us." The voice of the one shaking her was grim and tired all at once. "She's coming round now. You wanna get the rest of the guys to run crowd control? Unless she doesn't wake up, this doesn't need to be a huge thing."
Voices. Too many voices. No. She didn't want to hear them. Why couldn't they just leave her alone?
"Come on, kid. You're almost there. Wake up!"
Someone brushed her hair back from her forehead the same way mommy used to, only this person didn't have a soft, delicate palm. It was big, rough and calloused.
Her eyes fluttered against her will and she squinted up at the two faces leaned over her.
She was flat on her back and Scott was holding her feet up off the ground, while the other rubbed their knuckles against the long bone in the middle of her chest, shaking her gently.
"There she is!" The man from the parking lot smiled at her, the worry crease lifting from between his brows. "Hey, Angie! You're ok. You fainted, but we got you. Everything is ok."
She did not feel ok. Nothing was ok!
"Jason? I found water…Oh, Angie! Honey…you poor thing!" That was Ronda.
The sound of Ronda's voice made her close her eyes again.
"Hey! Angie…open those eyes for me, sweetheart!" Jason, the one she'd stowed away with, was shaking her again.
"I'm not living with Uncle Curt." She mumbled weakly.
"What was that?" Jason leaned closer and asked the question quietly, as though opening the door for her to confide in him some great secret.
"I won't live with Uncle Curt. I'll run away again!" Angie said weakly, tears leaking out from under her lashes and dribbling into her ears. She was devastated that all she had left were her words to save her. People didn't listen to her. No one listened anymore. "Mommy said he's a bad person and hurts people. S-why I can't ever go for sleepovers."
There was long silence in the wake of her words and Angie kept her eyes clenched shut as she wiggled her feet loose from the hand holding them up and curled onto her side, blocking out the world the only way she had left with her arms around her head.
"Do not look at me like that! I had no reason to believe he was questionable! This is the first I'm hearing about it! Everything else checks out about him!" Ronda's voice shook with emotion. "Angie…honey, what exactly did mommy tell you? Maybe you misunderstood-"
"Doesn't matter if she misunderstood or not." Scott had been silently kneeling next to her on the other side. His voice was hard and angry despite how quiet the growl was. "She's not living with him."
"You haven't even done the-"
"I don't care if she's my kid or not! She's not living with him." The man's tone set the hair on the back of Angie's hair on end.
"Ok. You know what? Let's just worry about that later, alright?" Jason was speaking again and Angie guessed the warm hand on her back belonged to him. "Angie, let's get you off the floor and somewhere where we can talk about this more, ok? No one wants you scared or feeling unsafe. Ok? Can you sit up for me?"
Shaking her head, Angie curled tighter into her ball and said weakly, "Don't feel good."
"Yeah, you probably feel pretty crummy right now," Jason was rubbing her back sympathetically now, "Hey, you know what? Sometimes when I feel crummy like that being outside helps. Do you think I could take you outside?"
Overwhelmed by the smells and sounds that triggered too many painful memories, Angie nodded miserably.
"Yeah? Ok, good. I'm going to carry you out, ok?"
Angie didn't care. She just wanted to be somewhere else.
Arms slipped under her, lifting her off the floor and cradling her so her head tipped into a broad shoulder.
"Angie, why did you run off like that?!" Ronda asked.
Clenching her jaw as she swung her legs, Angie didn't answer. She hadn't spoken since the bookstore. Jason had carried her outside and set her on the tailgate of his truck before making her drink some water and asking questions that she wouldn't acknowledge.
"Honey, I can't help you if you don't talk." Ronda tried again.
Still Angie couldn't bring herself to speak. She was too hyper aware of the huge, silent man leaning his arms against the side of the pickup just out of the corner of her eye.
"You know…" Jason leaned forward so his forearms rested on the tailgate next to her and tilted his head as he studied her. "You seemed like you had a pretty well thought out plan there. And you managed to evade some pretty skilled people for a lot longer than anyone could have expected. That's impressive."
Feeling like she was being tricked by the compliment but disarmed all at once, Angie frowned a little and slowly let herself turn her head so she looked at him.
"With something as well thought out as that, I can imagine that there was more to it than just hiding in a mall though." Jason fixed her with a look she'd only experienced with her mom and Angie's throat closed up. The truth was going to pour out of her in a minute. She could feel it being coaxed out by patience and that knowing understanding that always made her feel safe, even when she'd messed up. "Am I wrong?"
One tiny little head shake as her chin dropped so she could study her sleeves again confirmed his theory.
"What was the plan then?" Jason's low timber tugged at her gently. "You were pretty determined to get wherever you were running to. Where did you need to go?"
That word. That one word. Need . It crushed her and her lips started to tremble.
"T-the cabin by the lake." Angie whispered.
"A cabin by the lake…that sounds really beautiful!" Jason said quietly. She could feel him watching her closely. "Why there?"
"W-we used to go there," Tears crawled up Angie's throat and she swallowed back a sob with a whine. "Mommy and me…it was our place and-and I-I-I just wanted to go because-because things are safe there and they make sense there and-and I just want my m-mom and maybe-maybe some part of her is still there because she promised she wouldn't leave me and I need her-"
Angie lost her battle with the volcano bursting in her chest and she burst into ragged sobs, "I just need to go there! I want her back!"
"Oh, Angie!" Ronda was moving closer, hand resting on her knee. "Honey-"
Miserable and reeling with the eruption of sudden grief, Angie let the woman hug her.
"I can't go live with Uncle Curt." Angie mewed between deep, hitched sobs. "Mommy said to stay away from him! And I'm scared to go live with a foster family cause last year a girl in my class was a foster, and she- she had bad things happen and-"
"You're not living with the asshole Curt and you're not going to foster care."
The sudden words from Scott made Angie jump a little because while they were quiet, they were hard and convicted.
Turning her face from where she'd buried it against Ronda, Angie peeked at the stone faced, hulking man.
She was surprised to find something in his face was softened. Somehow the hard lines weren't as scary and there were creases of compassion around his eyes now when she met his gaze.
"But you don't want me." Angie blurted, another sob slipping out with the words.
He shook his head once and his jaw clenched a little while he tightened his loosely folded hands until the knuckles showed white. "I said a lot of things today, but I never said I didn't want you."
Disbelief paused Angie's tears and she blinked at him. A hot indignation boiled up in her chest suddenly as she remember the conversation she eavesdropped on and she heard her self arguing, "No, you said 'what would I do with a kid' and asked if I had anyone else and why didn't I go live with them and that it didn't even matter if you were or weren't my dad because you wouldn't take me anyway."
His eyebrows raise nearly to the edge of his backward baseball cap and some unidentifiable emotion flickered through his face.
"I did not say I wouldn't take you. I said I didn't know what I would do with you and it was going to cause a lot of changes. That is not the same thing."
"It sounds the same to me." Angie gulped, starting to lose her nerve the longer she maintained the staring contest and finally turning back into Ronda.
"Fair enough." His growl was huffed and held a hint of defeat that didn't give Angie any satisfaction. Next he was addressing Ronda. "What happens next here."
"Well, if you're still willing to, we go get the paternity test done. If she's yours and you're willing to take custody of her, then we start making those arrangements. It shouldn't be too much red tape. I did my research on you before we came and you check out, with a few minor concerns. If she's not yours…then I figure out somewhere safe for her to go and she's no longer your concern."
"Then let's get it done."