The first week is pretty easy, at least by Jackson's standards. He spends 3 of those days in the daycare when he drops. Getting to play with April and Alex improves his mood by a lot. He truly hadn't realized just how much he missed it there. Mark even came to visit a couple of times to play with him and they got lunch together.
The other 3 days, he spent in Mark's office. He watched movies on his laptop, read medical journals and even got to walk around a little to catch up with everyone. He longed for Mark's day off by the end of the week. The older surgeon wasn't supposed to work 6 days in a row but given the previous week he took off, he had a lot of work to catch up on. Not to mention the plastics department being down a whole doctor.
Jackson spends the day off at the gym, happy to get back in. He spends the last of the day cuddled up with Mark and watching yet another movie.
All making a plan for his final week. He's feeling completely fine now. There's no reason why he can't return to work as usual.
"Alright, Ducky," Mark says as they step off the elevator and head towards the offices. "I have a pretty big surgery today. So, you're going to hang out with Derek."
"I can be in your office alone."
"If you need anything, Derek will be there," Mark continues as if he hadn't said anything. "He's got a lot of boring paperwork so you can just chill."
"Why don't I come with you?" Mark opens his mouth but Jackson powers on. "I could at least observe. Like I used to, when I was a resident."
Mark smiles a little. "You're not a resident anymore, bud. Besides, that's still working."
"I wouldn't touch patients."
"One more week and we can go back to working together." Mark squeezes his shoulder. "I miss you too, you know?"
"I think you've seen a bit too much of me lately," Jackson says with a small smirk. "Maybe you should be sick of me."
"Never. Now, here." He removes the backpack from his shoulder. "Laptop, cards, medical journals, other books. Oh, I packed you a snack and your juice. Left you money for lunch, even though I'm sure Derek will insist on paying." Mark rolls his eyes and Jackson chuckles at the irony. The caregiver always pays for stuff, even after Jackson has told him a million times that he has money. At the very least, Mark's allowed him to start paying rent recently. "Plus stuff you'll need if you drop. Including Hank and Ranger."
"And my appendix pillow?"
Mark sighs, shaking his head. "And your stupid appendix pillow."
"Don't hate just because you don't have one."
"Hate?" Mark repeats. "Is that some kind of slang?"
"Try to keep up, old man."
Mark pops his bottom. Jackson jumps, poking out his tongue. Mark chuckles and knocks on Derek's door. Once they get the go ahead, they walk in. Derek's office is a little stuffier than Mark's. While the plastic surgeon's is mostly chrome and modern, the neurosurgeon's is filled with oak. There's pictures of ferry boats scattered about. His desk is littered with ones of Meredith and Alex. In fact, one of the few bits of whimsy are coloring pages and scribbles, likely done by the newest peds attending, as well as a miniature basketball hoop hooked up to the door.
"Hey, guys." Derek rises from his desk. "You ready to spend the day with me, Jack Jack?"
Jackson tries to hide his blush. Derek has gotten far too comfortable with giving him nicknames. "I guess. You know, you really don't have to. I'd be fine in Mark's office by myself…"
"And you'll be just as fine with me." Derek gestures to an overstuffed leather couch. "You can sit there if you like. Or there." He points to one of the chairs in front of his desk. Jackson shrugs and places his backpack by the couch. "We'll get lunch together later."
Jackson nods, his insides burning. He's being babysat. Jackson is in an older space and he's being babysat. By the chief of surgery of all people.
Yeah, he needs to be back at work now.
"I'm scheduled to be done by 7," Mark says. "I do have that surgery at 2, but who knows what else will come up in the meantime." He looks at Derek. "Page me if you need anything."
"I will." Derek gives him a reassuring smile. "Don't worry, he's in great hands."
"He's standing right here," Jackson mutters. "And I'm not some little kid."
"No, you're not. You're just recovering from surgery." Mark squeezes his shoulder. "Just relax, alright? Listen to Derek. Be on your best behavior for me, alright?"
"Yeah." Mark fixes him with a look. Jackson sighs. He doesn't want to lie. Okay, maybe he can persuade Derek without being a total brat. He is an Avery after all. It's their job to charm others. "Yes, I promise."
"That's my boy."
Jackson smiles a little as his caregiver kisses his forehead and gently squeezes his cheek. Mark turns back to Derek.
"Thanks again."
"Of course. You don't have to worry, we'll be just fine."
"I believe that, but I'll still worry."
Derek chuckles. "I figured."
Mark gives Jackson one last kiss. "I love you, Ducky."
"Love you too."
Jackson settles onto the couch as Mark leaves. He takes out a book and begins to read. Derek settles behind his desk and attends to his paperwork. Jackson takes interest in what he's reading. Best not start bugging him right off.
Jackson impresses himself with his patience to wait to bring up the subject until lunch. As expected, Derek doesn't let him pay. As annoying as it is, he just plasters a smile on his face and says "thank you" before they walk over to the tables. Jackson looks around.
"No Alex?"
"It's his day off. He didn't drop, so he's running errands."
"I don't think I could picture Alex running errands."
"Well more accurately, he's probably running a shopping cart up and down an aisle. Speaking of which, excuse me a minute." He pulls out his phone and squints to read the screen of his phone. Derek usually wears glasses during surgery. Jackson almost wants to suggest he put them on now, but again, saves his energy. Eventually, he types out the message and slides his phone back in his pocket. "Sorry about that."
"No problem." Jackson stabs his salad and takes a bite. "Mind if I ask what that was about?"
"Just reminding Alex that he does not need sugary cereal. And that I'll bring him back to return it if he brings it in the house." Jackson snorts. Derek tilts his head. "What?"
"You just sound like such a…dad."
"Hate to break it to ya, Jack, but I am one."
Jackson nods, going back to his food. Derek starts talking about a surgery he has planned for the following day. Jackson listens intently. While he has no regrets going into plastics, there's no doubt that neurology was a close second for him. All parts of the body are fragile, but the brain more so. He still gets a little nervous when performing around that.
Halfway through the story, Jackson finds his mind drifting away. He glances out the window. There's a resident he vaguely recognizes waiting outside the locker room. Mark walks over and they begin conferring. Jackson bites his lip as he stabs his salad yet again and takes an aggressive bite. Mark mentioned having a new "kid" on his service today. That means he'll get to observe the surgery. Yet, Jackson is stuck upstairs.
He doesn't quite understand the pang of jealousy that takes over his stomach. Of course Mark is going to have new residents on his service. That's just a part of being a teaching hospital. Jackson isn't a resident anymore. He'll still work closely with and even alongside Mark. It's still not the same. Mark is going to spend all day with this "kid".
Is he a Little too?
Jackson can't hear what they're talking about but from Mark's facial expressions, he's probably making the same jokes. The resident laughs along. It seems genuine. Mark is not that funny.
Why does this stupid resident have to be with his dad?
No, no. His Mark.
Dammit.
Jackson clicks his tongue and takes a long sip of his ice tea. Derek breaks out of his story and observes him.
"You okay?"
Jackson lowers his cup. "Yeah, fine. Um, can I ask you something?"
"Of course." Derek dabs the corners of his mouth. "What's going on?"
"So, I know Meredith says I can't come back on until next week…"
"She did, and I agreed," he swiftly interrupts. Jackson holds back a sigh. "You're not ready quite yet."
"It's just one week," Jackson argues, keeping his voice light. "What's really going to change in that time?"
"I'm sure you're tired of this argument, but what would you tell a patient?"
Jackson takes a deep breath. "I am tired of hearing it, because it doesn't apply here."
"Jackson." Derek gives him a patient smile. "I know you're anxious to get back to work. I can appreciate that. But, you only have 7 days left, you know? That's not bad, all things considered. You've made it this far. No need to stress out over one week."
Jackson stares down at his salad. There's a tone of finality in the air. Why can't Derek understand? It was one thing when he was home on bedrest or even in the daycare. Now, he's spending time in Mark's office or, as of today, Derek's. He's just a few months out from passing the boards. This is the time where he's supposed to be making his mark. Not sitting around with his thumb up his ass.
Derek changes the subject before he can argue more. So, Jackson lets it go. For now.
In his past year as a father, Derek has grown used to the endless questions. Having 4 sisters gave him endless patience. Being both a father and a brother have made him into a stronger person.
Jackson Avery apparently lives to test that.
Derek wasn't dumb enough to truly believe that Jackson accepted his time off. Still, he thought he'd at least wait a little before bringing it up again.
They're not back from lunch 15 minutes when he broaches the subject again. Then another 45 minutes later. Each time it's the same.
"Meredith said you're not ready and I agree."
It's brought up 4 more times within the next few hours. Jackson will take a break. Watch an episode of some show on his laptop or flip through a medical journal. It lulls Derek into a false sense of security as he returns to his paperwork and sets up meetings for the next few weeks.
Then he hears Jackson pipe up.
"Really, after today, it's just 6 days. I don't see how this really means much."
Derek tries to ignore him. He's not going to feed into this any longer. Gritting his teeth, he starts to return an e-mail.
"If you truly want your time to sort all this paperwork out, you could easily put me into rotation again."
Derek's fist slams against the desk. "Jackson, I swear, I am not having this conversation with you again." The younger surgeon's lips form into a pout. Derek shakes his head. Exhaustion cancels out any sympathy. "You will not step foot in an OR until I give you authorization. That's it. No negotiating."
"Everything is negotiable."
"Maybe in the world of the Averys, but this is my hospital." Derek narrows his eyes. He watches as Jackson does the same. "Now, unless you want to face some serious consequences, you will not bring this up again."
Jackson grumbles and curls up on the couch. Derek sighs and looks back at the computer. He runs his fingers through his hair.
"I have to use the bathroom," he says, pushing back his chair. "Wait right here."
"You're not going to rope some intern to be my nanny in your absence?"
Derek holds up a hand as he leaves the room. He can't wait to talk to Mark about all this. Deep down, he knows this isn't Jackson. Usually, he's focused on gaining respect of everyone. This means at the very least, he feels comfortable with him. That's something to cling to.
After taking a bit of a breather, Derek returns to the office with an attempt at a new frame of mind. They still have another few hours left. Maybe they can turn this around. He can't let Jackson look at any classified information, but surely he can find something for him to do.
"Hey, Jackson, look," Derek starts as he enters the office.
He trails off when he finds the couch empty.
The interest in renewing the afternoon floats out the office.
"Jackson!" Derek huffs as he turns a corner.
Ben holds up his hands. "Hey, man, he came to talk to me."
Derek sighs and goes to answer when he notices Jackson is starting to slip away. He quickly grabs hold of the hood on his sweatshirt and yanks him back. Derek keeps a firm grip as he looks back at Ben.
"You go about your day," he says. "I hope he wasn't bothering you."
"Just venting," Ben says. He shoots Jackson a sympathetic smile. "See you next week."
"No, you'll see me…" A firm look from Derek cuts him off.
Once Ben is gone, Derek moves his grip to Jackson's arm and guides him back towards the elevator. The younger surgeon squirms against him.
"Shepherd!" Jackson's cheeks are pink. "Let me go!"
"I just spent the past 45 minutes looking for you! I was this close to calling a Code Purple!" Derek's booming voice catches the attention of some of the nearby nurses but they quickly pretend to busy themselves. "Do you realize that?"
"I was just talking to Ben."
"And what? Hoping to get him on your side?" Derek jams the button for the elevator twice. "You realize he has no say when you go back. I do."
"You're not even listening to me…"
"Oh, I have," Derek swiftly corrects. "This is all I have heard for hours."
He jams the button one more time. Finally, the doors open. Meredith is about to step off when she sees the two of them. Instead, she presses for the door to remain open. Derek gestures to the spot beside her.
"After you," he says. Jackson remains planted in place. His cheeks are bright red. Derek sighs. It shouldn't have gotten to this point. If he just stayed in the damn office, they wouldn't be here right now. "Jackson Avery…"
"You're not the fucking boss of me!" Jackson snaps. "I don't have to listen to you!"
Derek clenches his teeth. Once again, he grabs hold of Jackson's arm and drags him back onto the elevator. This time, the younger surgeon doesn't attempt to pull away. His eyes are wide. Derek isn't sure if he sees some recognition in them. Still, he ignores it.
Meredith places a hand on his shoulder. He meets her eye. She inhales then exhales, gesturing for him to copy. Derek does when he realizes she isn't letting up. He releases his grip on Jackson's arms.
"Take him to Mark's office," he whispers. "I…I need a minute."
Meredith nods. She rubs his back and kisses his cheek. "I'll call a nurse to grab Mark when he's done with his surgery."
Jackson chooses then to speak up. "Wait…"
"Jackson." Meredith's voice shifts to a tone she usually reserves for Alex. "It's in your best interest to keep quiet right now."
The rest of the elevator ride is silent.
Mark feels he's aged 50 years after that surgery. The stubborn old man nearly died on him twice at the end. There was no way he was going to face that sweet old lady in the lobby and tell her that her husband wouldn't make it home for dinner, all over a broken nose. He'll die in a few years from old age, as the good lord intended. Luckily, he pulled through seamlessly.
Not 10 minutes after the short old lady squeezes him tight for fixing her Edgar does he get a chance to look at his pager. Derek. He quickly checks his phone. There are three texts requesting he come up to the chief of surgery's office, now.
"What the hell did that kid do," he mumbles to himself.
Mark strides into Derek's office. His best friend rises from his desk. That disappointed frown is spread across his face.
"Where is he?" Mark asks.
"In your office. I put him in the corner."
"And left him alone?!"
Derek inhales and shuts his eyes for 5 seconds before exhaling and opening. "No. Meredith is in there with him."
"What could he have done that pissed you off so bad?"
"He wouldn't stop asking me about when he could come back to work. I told him to cut it out. Then, I left the room for 5 minutes to pee. When I came back, he was gone." Mark's eyes widen. "I had to run around the hospital for 45 minutes and found him harassing Ben. I tried telling him to come with me and he told me, and I quote, "you're not the fucking boss of me"."
Mark gulps. Derek stuffs his hands into the pockets of his lab coat.
"I have half a mind to extend his leave."
Mark blinks a few times. He tries to compartmentalize. There's one part of him that wants to deal with Jackson for his disrespect right now. The other that needs to apologize profusely to his friend and feel shame for his kid doing this in the first place. Oh, and the final one that wants to beg for him to not act rash.
"Derek, I…I am so sorry." He goes with the groveling first. "I know he's been in a bit of a mood these past few weeks, but I never could've imagined…I mean, are you sure he said that?"
"Meredith was right there if you truly don't believe me."
"No, no, I do. It's just…he's never said anything like this before. Has he?"
"Not to my knowledge." Derek folds his arms over his chest. "But that hardly matters now."
"No, no, of course. It's just…I'm sorry," Mark repeats. "You have to believe me that if I thought for a minute he'd act this way that I wouldn't have asked you to watch him."
"I do. The truth is, I know this isn't Jackson." Derek sighs. "It doesn't change the point that his behavior today was completely unacceptable."
"I know. I promise you, I am going to handle it. He's going to apologize. It will never, ever happen again."
"It better not."
Mark draws back a deep breath. Derek doesn't look as pissed as he should. Proof that he did the right thing by having Meredith step in. At least he's had the time to calm down.
"Derek, I know I am in no position to ask for a favor," he says. "And realistically, anyone who spoke to you like that needs consequences. But I need you to please trust I can handle it. Don't extend his leave."
"Why? Because you think he'll throw a bigger fit? That's not a reason."
"That's not why I'm asking." Even though a small part of it is. He isn't sure how much more of this he can put up with. He loves Jackson. He will help him through every tantrum and big feeling. There's no shortcuts in parenting. If he can avoid it, though, he's sure as hell going to try. "There's no excuse for what he just did. But if you know this isn't him, and I know this isn't him, can you trust me to make sure it doesn't happen again?"
Derek purses his lips. He studies Mark's face for a moment. Things haven't been this tense between them in quite a bit. Just when their friendship seems to be getting on track, there's another roadblock. If there was ever a disagreement about kids, Mark expected it to be something Alex did. Now, here he is, the one who has to grovel.
"I'm giving him one shot," Derek says. Mark exhales a sigh of relief. "But if he has another break down like this, I will extend his leave. No hesitation."
"I completely understand. Thanks, Derek." Mark runs his fingers through his short curls. "I really am sorry about all of this. I don't know what has gotten into the boy."
"I think it goes beyond the appendectomy." Derek's voice is calming some. "He's been through a lot of changes these past few months, Mark. Accepting his classification, getting a proper caregiver. That's not to mention the boards and all the new responsibilities he has at the hospital. This is just the straw that broke the camel's back."
"How am I going to fix it?"
"You'll talk to him about it. Get to the root of the problem."
"He never wants to talk."
Derek shrugs. "Guess now he doesn't have much of a choice."
"I don't know if I can make him…"
"Maybe you can't make him, but you can sure as hell try. You wanted to be his caregiver, Mark. This is a part of the territory. Getting them to talk about the rough stuff."
Jackson stares at a spot on the wall. The navy blue paint is chipping. He resists the itch to pull off a particularly long piece. His hands stay by his side, not wanting to be yelled at by Meredith again. Okay, maybe she didn't yell. Derek did.
Who is he to yell at him? He's not his caregiver. Jackson isn't Alex. This whole thing is ridiculous. They shouldn't be able to put him in timeout. He's not even feeling little!
The door opens. Jackson braces himself for Derek. Instead, he hears Mark's voice.
"Thanks, Meredith. I've got it from here." There's a pause. "I'm sorry for all this."
"I understand," she says, her voice kind but tired. "These past few weeks have been a build up of emotions."
"That doesn't make it okay. He knows better."
Jackson's cheeks flush. They're talking about him like he's not right there!
The door opens and shuts once again. Out of the corner of his eye, Jackson sees Meredith head for Derek's office.
"So," Mark says. Jackson turns around to find him with his arms folded over his chest. His brows are furrowed in frustration. "How does it feel to be in the running for Seattle Grace's brattiest surgeon?"
"I mean…there's Karev."
"You think this is funny?" Mark asks. Any warmth slips from his voice. Jackson shrugs. "You realize you cursed at the chief of surgery, don't you? The fricking chief."
"It's Derek…"
"When we're here, he's the chief!" Mark snaps. "If any other doctor spoke to him the way you did, they'd likely be written up. One in your shoes, potentially have their leave extended."
Jackson's eyes widen. "Did he…"
"No. He didn't." Jackson allows a short sigh of relief. "But, that only came after I pleaded your case and promised I'd handle you properly."
"Look, Mark, I'm going to apologize to Derek, okay?"
"Oh, yes, you will. But that's not the end of it. You were disrespectful beyond belief today. Not to mention, running off and hiding for nearly an hour? What the hell has gotten into you?!"
Jackson bites his lip as he tries to evaluate the question. He just wanted to get back in rotation. He wanted to feel normal again. He wanted to work with his dad…his Mark.
All he wants is for things to stop changing so damn much.
None of that comes out of his mouth. Instead, he heads for the door. He isn't even surprised when Mark grabs his arm. What he is surprised to find is when he receives 10 firm smacks to his bottom. Jackson jumps a little.
"Mark…you…"
He's gotten a few warning pops here and there over the past few months. Nothing like this, though.
Mark ignores him. He leans Jackson over a bit and administers another 10 swats. Jackson squirms and kicks his legs.
"Stop!"
"Are you going to run off?"
"No!"
Mark releases his arm. Jackson drops onto the couch and rubs his bottom. It doesn't hurt too bad, but the shock of Mark spanking him rattles his body.
"You are out of control," Mark continues. "I understand that things haven't been easy these past few weeks. You're itching to get back into surgery. But you have one week left. 7 days. And now is when you decide to go nuclear? Put your career in jeopardy? And for what? Because you're bored?"
"No!"
"Then what?"
"I don't want to talk about this anymore!" Jackson snaps. The tears are burning in his eyes. "I said I'd apologize to Derek, alright? I shouldn't have taken off and I shouldn't have cursed at him. I'll beg him to not extend my leave. What I did was wrong! I know that!"
"Yes, it was." Mark purses his lips. "And I want to know why you did it."
"I don't know!"
"See, I think you do. Contrary to being put in timeout just now, I know you haven't dropped. Which means you're of your adult mind. You can tell me what's going on, and you will."
"No, I won't! I told you before, I don't want to talk!"
"And I said you don't have a choice!"
"Of course I don't!" Jackson snaps, jumping up. "I haven't had a choice in a really, really long time."
Mark goes quiet. Jackson rubs the back of his neck. He continues to will the tears to go away.
"I…I'm not talking about you, alright? I chose this. I chose you to be my caregiver and that's what I want!" Jackson clarifies. "But it doesn't change that I didn't choose…this…me…my stupid classification in the first place!"
"You were born with it," Mark whispers.
"It doesn't change that I didn't choose this. I didn't choose for my deadbeat dad to walk out on me. Or for my mom to focus on the foundation instead of her own damn son. I mean, who does that?" Mark nods. "I didn't choose for her and my grandfather to put me in that camp. I…I didn't choose to lose Calvin."
Jackson wipes at his eyes with the back of his hands. He is not about to cry over a dumb stuffed tiger.
"I didn't choose to be in that horrible place and humiliated every day of my life. Sure, I chose med school and to be a doctor. But…but now, my classification's out. And my entire life is different! I've tried to get used to that. Used to the fact that no matter what, I've lost a great deal of my independence. Get used to…to having someone who actually cares! But then I have to get my stupid appendix out. Which means I lose out on work and I just…I can't do anything! It's not fair!"
The tears start falling. Another thing Jackson has fallen powerless to. Mark has remained mostly silent through this. Pity is written in his blue eyes. Jackson whimpers.
"You've got stupid new residents. And I…I'm just stuck here. Can't do surgery. Can't work. Then sometimes, it doesn't seem so bad. And I hate that! I hate that I'm starting to actually…" Jackson trails off.
"Enjoy being Little?" Mark whispers.
"Yes! I'm not supposed to! I'm supposed to be a big boy! I…I'm not supposed to be a stupid baby."
"Enjoying your time off doesn't make you a baby. It means you're taking some much needed rest."
"I don't want rest! I just…I want things to stop changing!"
Jackson buries his face in his hands so Mark won't see the tears that keep falling. A moment later, he's lifted off the ground. Jackson throws his arms around Mark's neck and clings on for dear life. His caregiver settles onto the couch as Jackson buries his head in his shoulder.
"You have had a rough few months," Mark whispers. "Hell, I'd say even a rough few decades, hm?" Jackson sniffles as the tears continue to fall. "So much has been out of your control and I know that's frustrating."
"I don' like it," Jackson's voice is muffled from his spot in Mark's neck.
"It's not very fun. These past few weeks especially."
"I…I'm scared," Jackson whispers.
Mark rubs circles on his back. "Scared of what, Ducky?"
"Scared that everything will change again. That I'll lose all of this and have to go back to the way it was before."
"I've told you, buddy. That'll never happen."
"It could."
"No, it won't. Because I'm not going anywhere." Mark gently rocks him. "I can't promise more things won't change. That's a part of life."
"That sucks," Jackson makes out behind a shaky breath.
Mark chuckles. He strokes Jackson's temple. "I know it does," he coos. "I don't think anyone is a huge fan of change. Not even me."
Jackson looks up at him with wide eyes. Mark nods.
"That's right. It's not easy for me either." He rubs Jackson's knuckles with his thumb. "And it's okay to be upset, frustrated, however you feel. But, buddy, you cannot handle it the way you did today. Badgering Derek and then blowing up on him? That's not you. That's partially why he went easy on you. He knows the man you're capable of being. The serious, professional, hardworking guy who is learning to balance work and his younger space."
Jackson chews on his lip. Anxiety balloons in his stomach. "I was a dick," he whispers.
"Language. Even though, yeah, you were." Mark gazes down at him. His blue eyes are stern, but there's still love there. "You'll apologize to him, Meredith too."
Jackson nods. "But…what am I supposed to do about the rest of it?"
"These are things we'll have to work on together. Like it or not, as I said, things may change, Jackson. In fact, not even may, they will. Sometimes, as much as we'd like, we won't always have control over everything. It's scary and no fun at all. Remember what I told you last week? We can't control our emotions or what happens in life. All we can do is control how we react to them."
Jackson rubs his face against Mark's scrubs. "I don't wanna blow up at everyone."
"I know you don't. So, we'll find some techniques to prevent that, hm? Even beyond this situation."
Jackson nods. The fear and anxiety linger as Mark gently rocks him and presses kisses to his face.
"Did I hear something about "stupid residents"?" Mark mutters as he gets him on the nose.
Jackson pouts. "New kid on your service."
Mark smiles a little. "Someone's a bit jealous?"
"No! I just…I don't like change. It's like I just said."
"Ah, so not a flicker of jealousy?"
"No. Have fun with him," Jackson mumbles.
"He's not there to have fun with me, Ducky, he's there to learn. But that's all it is. I've still only got one little boy, and that's you." Jackson chews on his lip. "Buddy, there may always be changes in life, but there will also be constants. And I want to be that for you. Someone who is by your side, no matter what."
"Even when I blow up?"
"Even when you become cranky Jack Attack who's crushing all the villages," Mark rocks him again. "I will be here. Be here to pop your bottom or ground you, which you are by the way." Jackson makes a face. "But I'll still be here. And not just to punish you. For the love, the talking and all the cuddles."
Jackson nods. He clings to Mark's lab coat.
"I meant what I said," he whispers. "You're one of the few things I chose. Glad I did."
"I am too, Ducky." Mark kisses his cheek. "I am too. You are one of the best choices I ever made."
The briefest smile tugs on Jackson's lips. "I should apologize to Derek."
"You can do that in a bit." Mark bounces his leg. "I have to get some paperwork done and you're going to stay with me. Give you some time to find your words."
"Words suck," Jackson mumbles.
"I know. But doesn't it feel better to use them?"
Jackson hesitates then nods. He buries his head in Mark's neck as he's carried back to the desk.
"Love you," Jackson whispers.
Mark nods. "I love you too, Ducky."
Jackson remains curled up into his Mark's side.
His dad's side.
The word sits heavily on the tip of his tongue. And yet, it doesn't fall off.
Instead, Jackson takes a much needed nap curled up on the lap of the man who just displayed one of the biggest acts of unconditional love. Isn't that what a dad is supposed to do?
How would he know? It's not like he ever had one before.
Next time, we get the long awaited Alex and Jackson playdate! There'll be fluff, angst, hurt/comfort and family feels galore!
Let me know what you think! As always, feel free to leave prompts or ask me questions! I am on Tumblr and love communicating on there, as well as in the comments