CHAPTER 2: SEPTEMBER

James left his luggage with the luggage elves and boarded one of the train cars. He was walking through the corridor when he heard somebody playing, as well as singing, Hot Love.

(By T Rex)

"Well she's my woman of gold and she's not very old, uhuhuh!"

James knocked a couple of times before opening. And sure enough, there was Sirius, stretched across the seat, guitar in lap.

"Hi!" said James and sat down on a cat toy. "Ow."

He removed the cat toy from under his butt. His throat began to itch.

"Remember me?"

Sirius scratched a cat on his shoulder.

"'Course I do. A teacher never forgets a student."

He was extremely well dressed today. Everything he wore had been tailored to perfection. James was reminded of those fanatically purist kids he had attended his previous school with.

"Did you make enough money for a Twister?" Sirius asked.

"No I did not make enough money for a Twister."

James got up to put his backpack on the luggage rack. There were two cats up there so he decided he didn't want hair all over it.

"What about you? Did you make enough money for a castrato master?" he asked, sitting down again and unpacking his cortihistamine.

"No. The Ward has stopped paying spotters because of budget cuts."

The train started moving. James's eyes were drawn to a snake brooch that Sirius was wearing. He had snakes embroidered all over him, from his collar to his socks no doubt. Even the collars on his cats.

Just great, he thought when he realised he was sharing a compartment with a purist. He could not be arsed to look for a different one.

"I came pretty close," said Sirius. "You got into it a little late. Maybe you could have made more if you hadn't been so slow. It can take a while to get into a good rhythm."

James swallowed a handful of cortihistamine tablets and unpacked his Q Mag.

"Yeah but I think the real problem was that my mum took all my money because I got my neighbour in trouble."

The memory pissed him off more than he had thought it would. He realised he had been taken for a ride by a fascist.

Sirius stopped playing and frowned at him.

"You outed a shifter and your mum took all your money for it? You should have been rewarded."

"She took all my money because Mr Teller-Penn is innocent. Your system fails."

"How do you know this person is innocent? You did the test, did you not?"

"I pricked my neighbour Mr Teller-Penn by accident, not realising it was him. And when I did I had already summoned aurors."

"O...kay? Maybe I forgot to tell you that even your neighbour can be a werewolf. Really thought it was obvious."

"Mr Teller-Penn is not a werewolf!"
"You said you did the test! Did you not do the test?"

"Your test is shit is what I'm saying!"

"Um no it is not shit! You just didn't like what you found! I'm sorry to say I think your mum could be suffering from were-blindness. Do you know what were-blindness is? It's what can happen if a person gets too close to a werewolf on a personal level. They start to think of them as 'people too!' and then BOOM!" Mime explosion. "That's how they get you most of the time. It's a surefire way to get marked. Do you know what it means to be marked? It means that they imprint their scent on you so that next time there's a full moon out, they will find you. All it takes... is the slightest touch."

He gave James a light tap on the shoulder.

"Wop."

"I know what it means to be marked!" said James, who couldn't stand having things he already knew explained to him. "You're not listening. If Mr Teller-Penn was a werewolf there would be other signs."

"Like what?"

"Like the rain would make his eyes bleed for example."

Sirius rolled his eyes at him.

"Do you believe everything you read in the Daily Erised?"

"I don't, unlike you."

"Their eyes don't bleed when it rains. They shrivel and fall out."

"People just know. Whenever you read about somebody being caught, the neighbours are always kind of: 'Yup! We always sensed something was weird about him!' Then all of a sudden everybody has a story."

"Mr Teller-Penn might just be a very recent convert. What did the aurors say?"

"Mr Teller-Penn is a retired auror too so they let him off."

"Well. Aurors will have each other's backs, is that also news to you?"

"I walk his dog all the time. Your test is shit and you are a fraud."

He added, mumbling: "Just like you all are."

He opened his Q Mag in front of his face to signal talk over.

The train bumped along. It began to rain. James plopped a Quality Street in his mouth, looking at pictures of Darren O'Hare's beach condo. Sirius stopped playing.

"His OWN cinema, WOW!" James mumbled.

"My granddad's dead."

James looked up from his Q Mag. Sirius was stroking his cat and eating liquorice worms.

"I'm sorry," said James. "Quality Street?"

Sirius passed on the Quality Street. James hated liquorice but accepted a worm just to be polite. He stuck it between the seats.

"Was he old?"

"Pretty old. My mother says we must be grateful he lived for as long as he did."

"How old was he?"

"53."

"That's not actually old in granddad terms."

"Maybe it's not very old when you consider that Dumbledore is 200."

James's toffee penny fell out of his mouth.

"Dumbledore is 200?"

"My granddad was never that interested in rushing his immortality project. I think he thought he'd always have time, so he kept putting it off."

He looked genuinely sad. Another cat came down from the luggage rack to curl up on his lap. James had counted three black cats. He looked forward to not having to live with three cats.

"How did he die?"

"He was murdered."

James's toffee penny fell out again.

"Murdered?"

"You'd think it was natural causes but no."

"Did they catch the murderer?"

"No. He was the headmaster here, you know. Dumbledore was the last person to see him. Now he is the headmaster. Do you want to play exploding shithead?"

Sirius unpacked a deck of cards and they played exploding shithead to the tune of smattering rain for hours until the conductor announced that they had reached their destination.

"So," said James when they were standing in line to get on the bus. "What house do you think you will be?"

Because maybe, JUUUSSSST maybe…"
"Slytherin. Definitely Slytherin, there is no doubt about it. I have never been more sure of anything else and it is what I want."

"Oh. I see."

It was clear to James now that they would never get on and that they had nothing more to say to each other.

"Although," he said, "On the bright side, I guess I won't mind having you as a rival."

"What makes you think you will have me as a rival?"

"Look, it's a tradition old as time itself. My father had a rival before him. His father had a rival before him."

"Ok but look, you still have to deserve me. I want a worthy rival. I want a smart Gryffindor even if that is asking a lot."

"Who'd be a better rival than me?"

Behind them, some fat chap slipped and fell in a puddle.

"Him?" Sirius got on the bus laughing.

"I'm sorry," said James when they were seated in the back. "When you said you wanted a worthy rival I thought you meant that I wasn't worthy, not the other way around. Not as full of yourself as I thought."