All rights are reserved to their respective owners. I own nothing in this piece of fiction except my OCs and the story itself.
"Hmph. Haters will hate, I suppose." The masculine and sophisticated voice responded to AL's boisterous complaint.
Gris grew from a flat 6'0'' to a towering 6'4''. His hair turned jet black as it spiked up, akin to a certain earring fusion, complete with the two signature bangs as it became much more gravity definition.
His eyes also shifted from a shining grey to onyx black with white power signal pupils in his eyes. His body became more defined as his muscles were more on the aesthetic side but still retained their mass as he stood with a stoic stance as he folded his arms as his head was tilted with a neutral expression.
The now divine assassin wore a full spandex bodysuit that was black like Brave Heart's, except it covered his entire body to his wrists rather than leaving his arms exposed.
He radiated big PP energy because what else could you categorize male CPUs by?,
Power? This ain't that much of a shonen.
He also possessed white accents on his suit as he had white gloves that only went up to his mid-forearm area. The equipment had some black outlines as well as his boots that would look akin to Brave Heart's but was white with black and some grey as well on the tips.
He also initially was lacking flight processors, identical to the blue CPU's first time.
Brave Heart gave the new god a thumbs up as AL scowled in disbelief.
"Well, I'll be. Gris IS CPU material. Thought that killstreak would muck it up, but if the rock turns a blind eye, then so be it." The first CPU God shrugged.
"I think it was still remembering the corruption it was previously in and brushed Gris off as worthy because he's not a complete piece of shit. Or killed millions.'' AL spat.
"All I hear is boorish and piteous theories, AL. Come up with something remotely factual, backed up with none circumstantial evidence or be silent." Gris directed a humored glance to the fire user.
"...Next thing he'll say is 'indubitably'," AL grumbled as he looked away, not wanting to start an altercation with another deity.
He had enough of that already for the day, and it began two hours ago.
"So, what do you want to call this version of yourself?" Brave Heart questioned his fellow god.
"That's a fine question..." Gris would ask. "How about... Grey Heart?" He began the suggestions.
"Basic." Nebula and AL chanted.
"Steel Heart?" The spiky-haired new god raised a brow.
"Meh." Brave Heart sounded. It was barely decent but needed some more oomph.
"Agony Heart?" The deciding god's brows leveled.
"You're not that evil... I think." AL second-guessed. Prior experiences might argue otherwise.
"Shadow Heart." The dark deity was brought up. AL nearly choked on a third SP Charger he chugged down as he laughed within the can.
"Pfft!" Brave Heart held back a laugh.
"Dark Heart...?" He stated questioningly. Even he wasn't sure of that epithet.
"Might as well just flat out say Edge Heart at this point." AL joked.
"Edge Heart... Excellent...!" He slammed his fist into his open palm, a eureka moment going off within his mind.
"... I hope that's a joke-" AL warned.
"That's his nickname." Brave Heart laughed.
"Nope. That is now my divine epithet. I find the irony endearing." He accepted with a humorous huff.
Silence.
"Hm? What's the matter, you two?" The newly named Edge Heart asked with a questioning gaze
"You can take a jab at being edgy in this form?" Brave Heart observed, wide-eyed.
"I'm more accepting of my flaws. Just like how I've come up with Meme Heart for your nickname, you insufferable meme lord." Edge Heart rebutted.
"And have good comebacks, too? Edge Heart it is." AL nodded with a mixed expression of surprise and satisfaction as he internalized the fact that a sarcastic jab was the new god's namesake.
"This characterization can only end well..." The blue god facepalmed with a snigger.
But then, a voice rang through, echoing.
"The explosion must have originated from here." The voice of Uni could be distinguished from the distance it was heard from the trio.
She was tired, the proof in the pudding lying within some bags under her eyes from being woken up with the Oracle telling her that something amiss to an invasion had occurred with all the conundrum that had gone down in the area she was approaching.
Behind her were some Lastation troops, all with firearms, the shot of energy from coffee and 4 Hour Energy, and formation to boot.
Brave Heart and Edge Heart heard them with their enhanced hearing as they turned in the direction. AL looked confused until he sensed and felt the familiar energy as he too turned to see them.
"Is that...!" AL recognize the energy.
"Looks like Uni's here. I don't really feel like explaining why we're not terrorists aligned with ASIC, and we have to head to Lowee anyway so let's skip all the exposition that we'll need to do and bounce!"
FLY!
Brave Heart brushed aside as he took off.
BOOST!
AL followed suit as he would have recovered enough energy to use his thrusters somewhat.
LEAP!
...
...
...
LAND!-
CRASH!
Edge Heart tried to follow them as well, but only ended up jumping high.
Which prompted Uni to hear him land as he did so with her enhanced hearing that all CPUs and CPU Candidates possessed.
"Hey, over there! I see someone!" She yelled. Her squadron that Kei sent immediately followed her as she ran towards them.
"C'mon, Edge Heart! Fly! FLY!" Brave Heart encouraged, trying not to laugh at the name.
"Fly, you fool!" AL yelled down.
JUMP!
...
LEAP!
...
...
LEAP!!!
...
...
...
SPRING!!!!!
"Shouting at me is not going to teach me how to do it, you simpletons!" Edge Heart barked back as he jumped higher and higher, but not flying as he ran on the ground.
"We're almost there! Stay right where you are!" Uni shouted as she neared.
Her rifle was be held at the ready in case the figures she saw tried to attack above her. The darkness concealed them so they were hard to make out, even with all the commotion that they made.
LAND!..
CROUCH!...
"One more jump!" Edge Heart stressed as he crouched for the next attempt..
SUMMON!
He then felt something behind him materialize.
It appeared to be a set of 8 processor units. They were all be projected from two singular black and dark grey cybernetic structures that were akin to the outermost wing bone of a bird.
JUMP!
...
SOAR!
From them projected some holographic white digital wings in the shape of a certain dividing dragon. They illuminated the area around him as he blasted off into the sky.
"That's our cue, AL!" Brave Heart recognized the processors appearing as they followed the ascending Edge Heart.
Uni only arrived shortly after they had left, to see 3 glimmers in the clearing clouds above.
TRANSFORM!
PILLAR!
BOOM!
BOOM!
BOOM!
She fired some shots at them as she transformed into HDD to try and bring them down, but even her marksmanship would be voided and dodged by all three in their heightened forms, not to mention they were basically out of her range, and with her weary eyes, she was basically shooting at flies.
"They got away." Black Sister grumbled with a cross look as she went to pursue the flying trio before she got a call from Kei. The device automatically answered as the Oracle's voice came through.
"Head back, Uni. You in that state would only accomplish burning out the rest of your energy." Kei gave instructions to the girl through the communicator.
Black Sister sighed as she looked up at the sky one last time and saw the glimmers disappear before she would revert to Uni.
"I'll get them for this..." She clenched her fist, as she returned to the Basilicom, with the squadron closely following her.
The trio had successfully escaped while simultaneously incriminating themselves in the process.
In hindsight, maybe explaining themselves would have taken less energy.
The night sky over the seas of Gamindustri was cold, peaceful, and tranquil as they were as elegant as ever.
ZOOM!!!
FLY!!!
BOOST!!!
The peaceful tranquillity was interrupted, however, as the escaped trio of heroes blazed by, embarking on an overseas round trip to the icy nation.
Brave Heart, Edge Heart, and AL were currently flying over the moonlight glistening oceans to Lowee.
The warriors (sans Edge Heart) their long-awaited trip to the snowy nation, where the girls were headed. Probably sleeping either in the nation if they took too long, or near it if they did make it before nightfall.
And long-awaited it was since AL had to made a quick circle back to Lastation, and picked up their bag with all their things by the Basilicom in his Burning Fever form since it took forever to get it back up to max.
The guard looked at him funny but would be dreadfully tired, even with the possible terrorist attack from ASIC that he returned from, so he just let him take the bag without much hassle.
He was healed by Gris, his temporal healing being dramatically increased as his battered body was brought back to tip-top shape in a minute.
After that, Gris was getting the hang of regulating his speed after flying for a bit, so they currently flew over 10,000 meters over the ocean at Mach 10 since that was the fastest AL could go.
Due to the speed that they were traveling, they were able to talk normally to and hear each other and ignore conventional physics, because of anime logic.
I know, weird right?
"Well, I for one don't mind it. If Gamindustri wants to be weird, let it. It's nice in a random, eccentric kind of way." Brave Heart stated his opinion as they zoomed across the clouds.
"It can get out of hand, sometimes," AL added.
"Sometimes is an obscene understatement, AL." The prestigious sounding CPU corrected.
"But back to the story, why are the three of us going to Lowee?" Edge Heart queried. He could leave his house for a few days, a couple of weeks at most, but he would have to return at some point to see if someone didn't ransack the place.
Or if the tax people came for an unexpected visit.
Or if his current girlfriend came by after he ignored all her calls.
OR-
"To stop ASIC." AL simply stated.
"Well, more precisely, to find the Mascots within Lowee and Leanbox, and get them to agree to lend us its power so that the CPU Candidates can rescue their sisters. We need all of them to help us so that we can defeat ASIC and prevent them from destroying the world. Or conquering it or something." Brave Heart gave the new god a more fleshed-out explanation.
"I still have mixed feelings about attacking my clients." Edge Heart stated. He knew that he made up his mind before, but some sort of feeling resembling a code of sorts bugged him.
"Your 'client' is trying to take over the world. And probably kill you in the process so they don't have to pay you." AL deadpanned. "What is there not to get?" He asked.
"They're a CRIMINAL SYNDICATE for crying out loud. Trusting them to do their part is like trusting a pedophile with your 10-year-old child." AL made the disturbing comparison a good point as Edge Heart sighed.
He took his job seriously, but if what AL was telling him was true, then it was better to forgo the mission after all.
...
...
...
"Alright. I'll let it go for now." The CPU sighed.
"For now?" Brave Heart asked.
"We still never found out how that battle would have ended. We'll settle that fight too, and now that I am a god, the scale with being even." Edge Heart cockily decided as they flew.
"Touché. Maybe we'll have a match after ASIC is defeated." Brave Heart agreed.
"But I'm still spinning you like a top any day of the week." The blue CPU challenged.
"How laughable." Edge Heart responded in turn.
"Your mom is laughable." Brave Heart fired back in a half-assed attempt. Mom jokes were Ol' Reliable for posh archetypes such as his peer.
"Nebula, I swear to Celestia." Edge Heart shouted, deeply annoyed. He had no idea where the last part came from but rolled with it.
"Poggers." That was all AL had to comment on as the three were approaching colder temperatures as they neared the city.
FREEZING!...
"Did the temperature just dive? I reckoned the transition would be a bit more smooth than this." Edge Heart commented as he changed the subject, a faint light shining in the distance.
"Forgot about that. Whenever you near Lowee, the temperature drops around the surrounding areas to suit the climate of the nation depending on your proximity. Probably due to sharing energy or something." Brave Heart gave the educated answer.
"It's because Lowee is the Land of the Lolis, and the temperature drop is there to simulate how cold your jail cell will be if you try to lewd any of them." AL gave a dark humor version of the explanation.
"Both of those explanations make sense, and I will make sure not too lewd any lolis while in Lowee, or anywhere else for that matter. I prefer of age, voluptuous women to avoid the term 'jailbait', like all men with rational tastes." Edge Heart wisely nodded as he took both explanations seriously as the city became clearer as they approached.
The city was not be as illuminated as it would be at say... 7 PM, but it still gave off enough light for the three flying males to see.
The central building, which was probably the Basilicom, was some kind of castle that was lit with yellow light, as opposed to the surrounding buildings that were shined blue.
LAND!
COLD WINDS!
The inns were closed by now, or any inn that wasn't a heavy hit to the OG duo's pockets, so they landed at the outskirts as they would feel the brunt of the cold temperature to stay undetected by the militia forces as pre-emptive invaders.
"Sure is cold. Good thing I'm a fire user." AL breathed a sigh of relief as he was unaffected.
"Easy for you to say." Brave Heart as he had to activate a thin KI aura to keep warm.
Even as a CPU, his good form was still somewhat affected to a lower degree than his human form.
"At least you two have precautionary measures. I'll have to brave the elements for now." Edge Heart said as rubbed his arms a bit before putting them back down. The trio then walked towards civilization.
"Wait. Our clothes are shredded." AL would say as they walked. "How are you two gonna survive?" He asked.
"Shit. You're right. All the stores are closed." Brave Heart said as he cupped his chin with his other arm under the first one.
"Guess we will have to rent a hotel, after all. Lucky I brought my wallet with me." Edge Heart remembered.
"Oh yeah? How much you got?" AL asked in a challenging tone.
"Enough." Edge Heart pointed out with an equally content smirk.
"Fair. You better hope it's enough." Brave Heart agreed with some banter.
"You guys can shut it." AL shushed as he swatted. "Let's just get some rooms at an inn and get some rest. "I've had enough shit from CPU for one night." The human complained.
"Agreed." Edge Heart and Brave Heart would say before pausing and thinking about what they just said.
"Wait-" They caught on as the scene changed-
The three soon found a luxury inn, and with the help of Gris' apparent bottomless pockets, they got some of the best rooms in the damn building.
Guess killing people does pay big.
In other words, blood money is real money. They each had their rooms as they rested for the night.
Nebula, AL, and Gris would have reverted and bought some Lowee coats and clothes so that they didn't freeze to death in the morning. They wore snow garbs in the morning, which was now!
The power of time skips, people.
The trio had awakened to get cleaned and dressed relatively quickly since the girls were still traveling, and there would be no possibility for ecchi walk-ins with the absent female cast, and they all had their bathrooms anyway.
The trope had been defeated by default. How cathartic.
They were properly dressed for some business in Lowee as they walked out of their rooms.
Nebula was dressed in a winter parka that was tangerine. He had on an indigo blue long-sleeved undershirt, and a black under undervest as he would have some layers for extra warmth as he kept his orange bandana scarf to his forehead as it was now an actual bandana in this part of the adventure.
He still retained it because it dodged a fatal blow that was last night. The god also had some blue winter gloves to match his shirt. His pants were some navy blue hiking pants that were stuffed into some burnt orange winter boots that were comfy and had brown fur at the mouth of the shoe.
Psuedo protagonist partakes in Winter Wonderland expansion pack-
Gris was in another trench coat, even though the last two got burned off. Maybe the rule of three would save this one. It was black (Of course) with a parka hoodie as it was pulled over his head this time to preserve as much body hear as possible, with the additional obligatory turtleneck and undervest.
He possessed a grey scarf that was wrapped around him as it provided extra warmth. His gloves were a darker shade of grey as they covered his hands. His pants would be very light grey, as they were some hiking pants that would be stuffed into black winter boots with white fur at the mouth.
Anything more and you'd swear he was in a film noir from sheer lack of color-
AL had on less layered clothing, as his power would let him feel unaffected by cold weather for the most part. He was in a scarlet red hoodless winter jacket with a maroon undershirt and some black jeans as he would be wearing some red winter boots with, but of course, the fur on the mouth of the shoe.
He also had on some red gloves and have on some goggles on his forehead for the winter accessory. How lucky he was, to not be required to layer due to his convenient affinity for fire-based attacks. It was also balanced out by the fact that he still couldn't just walk out in Lowee with nothing less than a layer of winter clothes.
It was simply illogical and not based.
They soon found themselves downstairs from the upper floor and would be sipping some hot cocoa at the Café area of the hotel on a three-seat table.
Today was a free day, so AL and Nebula saved some remaining credits while Gris was happy he didn't have to spend money.
"Well then, gentlemen. What's the plan." Gris put down his mug.
"We have to wait for the girls to show up firstly. My main character senses tell me that doing things too quickly ahead of time will just make the fandom upset." Nebula explained.
"Who even are these girls?" Gris raised a brow as he took a sip of his cocoa.
"The CPU Candidate of Planeptune, a Guild Member, A Nurse, well... Nurse-In-Training anyway, and a Heroine of Justice," AL explained after sipping his cup. "Sounds weird, but what isn't in this place." He would admit.
"CPU Candidate, huh," Gris repeated as he thought about the implications of such an esteemed individual on their team.
The Guild Member would most likely be from Planeptune as well, alongside a... Nurse-In-Training? Wouldn't she be in school? Meh. And a... Heroine of Justice, probably overbearing and spoke dramatically, could even bet his Lastation 2 that she made poses.
The Candidate though... Might be able to give him some pointers on the abilities and powers a CPU possessed.
"She's innocent as a baby, so don't try anything. Lest you incur the cockblock of the Guild Agent and the Heroine." AL gave some advice before taking a sip.
"Innocent, too. That means I have to censor myself. What a drag." Gris grumbled as he took another sip and grumbled.
"Half of them are innocent, and the Guild Agent may or may not be a lesbian. The Heroine of Justice..." AL paused.
"She's...?" The silver-haired assassin lead on.
"Flat." AL cringed in pity.
Gris lowered his head.
"Unfortunate." He mused.
"But I see you two have nothing to gain in their presence in a romantic sense." Gris raised it back up, however, as he chuckled, before taking a sip.
"I slept with one of them." Nebula stated as he sipped his cocoa with closed eyes and a small smile, which prompted Gris to nearly choke on the mouthful that he just swallowed as AL watched the assassin in cruel amusement.
COUGH!
HACK!
GRUMBLE...!
"-What..?!" Gris struggled as he was still beating his chest. "What did you just say?!" He asked his words askew by nearly choking on cocoa.
"I. Slept. Next. To. Her." Nebula repeated it, word by word as AL snarked into his hand as he laughed. Gris just watched the fellow deity very suspiciously as he regained his composure.
"For a moment there, I thought you weren't a meme lord virgin. Shame for giving me such a scare." Gris composed himself as he wagged his finger as he looked to Nebula, who had a smug look on his face.
WAG!
WAG!
WAG!...
WAG!...
...
...
"..." He stopped wagging.
"Heh."
"...!" AL was looking forward to Gris' next reaction. This was the payback he needed for the assassin trying to kill him.
"...You are lying." Gris assumed with a scowl.
"Nope." The both of them sounded out.
"Lost my virginity at 16. It was with a girl that liked me for a while in high school. Was an elf hybrid too, so you know she was saying stuff like 'Defile me, you orc!' in the sheets." The CPU put on a high-pitched effeminate voice to mimic the voice lines heard in many forms of media depicting the activists that took place between the two fantasy races in that specific "situation".
"She also didn't have blonde hair, which was refreshing now that I think about it, not I have anything wrong with the stereotype." Nebula explained. "Her name was Taleia. Best fuck, probably because it was my only fuck." The blue adventurer snorted, trying to look over the bland depiction of his sex life.
AL watched in amused silence once more as Gris just shakily drink some more of his cocoa to down his hidden disappointment that he couldn't annoy the adventure's soul by calling him a virgin.
But that wasn't to say that he was still one either.
"Anyway, what should we do? You only told us that we should wait for the girls to arrive, and they probably won't get here for another few hours." AL checked the time as he used his phone since his watch got busted up. It read 8:50 A.M.
"I think we should spend some time training my godly ability." Gris suggested as he recovered from the info drop. "I got them mere hours ago.." He added. "How long have you had yours, Nebula?" Gris queried for perspective.
"6 months."
"Only? I thought you had it for 3 years or something." The hitman inquired.
"If I had it for that long, ASIC would be nothing more than a bad memory, and Xero would have been forced to use his VPU form or something. Not to mention I'd be an insufferable and boring Gary Stu." Nebula shrugged, becoming aware of the medium he was in.
"Let's just get moving already. My feet are starting to sleep on me." AL decided as he finished his cocoa and got up.
"Alright. How 'bout it?" Nebula looked to the hitman after he also finished his cocoa. He stood up also.
Gris finished up his cocoa before getting up as well.
"Let's head out." Gris nodded as the three would walk out of the inn.
They then walked through the city of Lowee, looking at the city for a short bit before they huffed off for some training. The buildings were covered in snow, but that was to he expected as the climate was like that year-round.
The structures themselves were all sorts of bright colors and cylindrical as some, in particular, had dome-shaped roofs, almost like mushrooms.
And the people were wearing very warm winter clothes, also in many different colors as the vibe they gave off was warm and welcoming, standard Loweean behavior.
Children played in the playgrounds, building snow people and making snow angels and collecting familiar coins that were almost like a certain franchise's-
The place was a winter wonderland. Too bad it was influenced by ASIC at this point by the flyers put up at every corner.
"Sure is jolly," AL commented.
TEAR DOWN!
"ASIC still holds a grasp here though." Gris was the bearer of bad, but obvious news as he tore down a flyer.
"Example." Nebula pointed as they saw Underling, who was promoting the organization and trying to hand out flyers.
"And if you join ASIC today, you get to be a certified member and receive a free voucher!" She said in a loud and easily recognizable voice.
Linda was back, and being a pain in the side of good once again.
"Who's that?" Gris asked once more for the umpteenth time.
"That's one of the peons. Her name's Linda, but we call her Underling to piss her off." Nebula explained.
"I see." Gris trailed off as a smirk came onto his face from the idea.
"It's to the point where some think her parents gave her the name Underling.'' AL laughed.
"Oh really? Then who am I to break that chain." Gris voiced as he internally hummed in laughter.
"Let's bug her a bit before we go train. Might get some leads." Nebula offered as they approached the grunt.
"Join ASIC today!" Underling yelled as she looked to the side.
"ASIC sucks balls!..." AL blurted.
"Who said that!" She reacted as she turned, only to see the towering males.
"Gah! It's you two! The memelord and the knucklehead!" She identified as she pointed.
"And you must be Underling. How fitting." Gris took in the visage of the green haired grunt as she shifted her gaze to him.
"And who the hell are you?" She demanded harshly.
"I'd tell you, but you'd have to not be an underling for it to matter. But since you ARE an underling, you serve no greater purpose than to push the corporate and meta narrative forward." Gris flamed, which would get Underling to growl at him as Nebula stifled a laugh and AL flat out laughed once, hard.
"Snrrk!"
"HA!"
"Now somebody I don't even know is calling me Underling and making fun of my entire character for it! It's LINDA, you dunderhead!" She told Gris.
"Don't remember asking that question, but alright then. Your brain must be as underdeveloped as your chest if you're gonna spout shit that's irrelevant to the conversation. Oh wait. That's your character archetype." Gris responded, in a rather pretentious tone.
The reactions he got did not disappoint.
"I've just seen a murder. Call the police, AL!" Nebula's tried and failed not to laugh.
"HOOOOOOOOOOOOOLYYYYYYYYYYYYYY SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT!!!!!!" The fire user hollered as everyone in a 30-meter vicinity turned towards the two.
"That girl's gonna need an ice bath after that one." A random teenage NPC in the back cringed from the sheer power of the roast.
"That was legitness." The NPC's little brother watched in a mix of awe and an impressed look.
"Yeah, it was, ha-" His friend began until the grunt lost it.
"MY CHEST IS NOT UNDERDEVELOPED! JUST SHUT THE HELL UP YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE!" Underling yelled at the top of her lungs, her face scarlet from embarrassment, hurt feminine pride, and scorn from her attacked image.
Her tirade of expletives would have continued and surely escalated to a fight that she'd surely lose if it were not for Nebula.
"Hey, Underling." The blue-haired hero called.
"What!" She fiercely barked at him, her eyes welling up with angry tears.
Yes, she was that mad.
"Before you end up getting beat up again, answer me this." He asked. "Did ASIC ever put a bounty on someone's head in the last couple of days?" The god interrogated.
"Huh?... Oh, you mean the hit they put on some guy? Yeah, they hired some top of the line assassin to clean him, and once he does the job, they'll just off him too! They even promised him a big chunk of funds just to pull him in!" Underling explained as she laughed.
Gris' smile had faded away the moment those words left Underling's lips.
"What." The assassin dangerously asked.
"Wait... Sniff... That was you!? Pfft!" Underling then changed from a look of frustration and anger to one of amusement as she laughed at how the hitman had been roped into a one-sided deal.
CLENCH!
ドドドド!!!
Gris then clenched his gloves as he lowered his face, bangs covering his eyes.
ゴゴゴゴ!!!
ゴゴゴゴ!!!
ゴゴゴゴ!!!
"Well Underling, the guy who has the hit on him is me-" Nebula revealed as he cracked his knuckles, his face darkening as the girl stopped laughing. "-And the assassin is well, you know who it is..." He tilted his head to Gris, who gained a menacing aura as her eyes became white circles.
"Tell me how you want to die Linda." Gris inquired in a deep and unnerving voice, calling the grunt by her real name for the first time.
"I... I... I-I...!" Underling was startled and frightened at the top-notch assassin that was hired and his target was now in front of her.
So she did the only sensible thing she could have thought of at the time.
Run for the snowy hills.
She bolted as her life was in mortal danger, and Gris was more than ready to chase the punk girl and wipe her off the face of the franchise when AL grabbed his shoulder.
"Hold it. You might be fast, but she maxed out her speed stat." AL explained.
"I know I'm faster than her," Gris assured both to him and himself as he got ready to chase the fleeting girl.
"You run and fight. She just runs from all her problems. I'm telling you, it's unparalleled, Gris. The only thing that runs faster than her is a neglectful dad dodging child support and the expansion of the universe. Also tax fraud statistics." AL compared as Nebula laughed.
BZZT!
"YOWCH!" She cried out.
Gris squinted at the fleeting grunt before clenching his fist and relaxing it, giving in to the humor as a smile somehow got to his face as only just fired a jolt of lightning at her from his finger, which shocked her in the behind.
"She better hope she never sees me again," Gris warned as he would ignore the stares of the townspeople around them.
"You're gonna see her again." Nebula deadpanned. "And when did you learn electrokinesis...?" He continued.
"When did you learn to address the 4th wall?..." Was his simple response as he rebutted effortlessly.
"Touché." Was the answer that was met with the on-point observation.
"Let's just go. Where are we going to train?" AL questioned.
"Somewhere uninhabited." Nebula would decide. "I was thinking the island off the coast of Lowee, since the only thing there are monsters that aren't too strong, but weak enough to pose an acceptable threat." Nebula explained as he transformed.
"Access!"
TRANSFORM!
PILLAR!
The pillar of light would engulf him, and he transformed into Brave Heart.
Gris mirrored the command.
"Access."
TRANSFORM!
PILLAR!
The pillar would come down onto Gris, and he emerged as Edge Heart as he returned.
AL just flexed his muscles as he went into a crossguard before quickly bringing his forearms parallel to the ground as he went into his Burning Fever state.
ABLAZE!!!
"Hrah!"
The citizens gaped and gasped as they were in the presence of not one, but TWO CPU Gods.
How meticulous.
"CPUs?! And they're guys?! This is unheard of!" One of the citizens would shout. It appeared to be an elderly one from its hoarse tone.
"They are attractive, though..." A female voice thought aloud.
"And they chased off that ASIC lady just now!" Another male voice yelled. It was a street sweeper.
"My fanfiction is real! YEAH BOOOOOOOI-" A writer jumped for joy.
"The Loweeans are getting confused, let's leave why we can." Nebula would say as he blasted off.
FLY!
"Avoid exposition!" The god yelled as he blasted off again.
"One just left!" A small girl would point out.
ZOOM!!!
BOOST!
Gris and AL soon followed.
"And the other one with the fire guy just left as well!" The same teenager pointed out.
"Do they know about what happened to our CPU?" A guard of Lowee seriously questioned.
More people gathered as they circled the last location as they saw the figures in the air shrink.
''It's too late to ask them now. They left further north." Another guard answered.
The crowd was soon broken into by two little girls.
They were both be 4'03'', and both possessed dirt blonde hair, with one of them being long as it went to her mid-back, and the other reaching about shoulder length.
They wore matching clothes, being overcoats with white puffballs, the one with short hair being light blue, and the long-haired one light pink, their ribbons being the color the other had which was blue for the pink one, and pink for the blue one. So basically a mirrored color scheme to represent them being either related or involved with each other in some aspect.
Their hats also matched their overcoat colors with white in the mix as a pink rectangular symbol would be present in the center of their hats as an added detail. Their legwear consisted of white tights as their shoes would be cute snow boots that matched their colors and the ribbons as well with some golden bells being on their shoes alongside their overcoat.
They both also had a face of blue eyes and innocent expressions. And no, I'm not telling you're their cup size, you weirdos. We already have someone that fits that bill and my audience is not to fall down that demented path-
"Hey, what's all this crowding about?" The one in pink asked, annoyed. Her expression mimicked her tone of voice.
"I dunno, Ram." The one in blue responded, albeit slower than the average person.
"Oh! Rom and Ram! Some CPUs were just here a few seconds ago." The second guard answered.
"What?! CPUs?! They came to take our shares!" The pink one known as Ram exclaimed.
"Take... our shares?!" Rom reeled in surprise and slight fear.
"Uh... I don't think they seemed very interested in taking our shares, Lady Ram." The first guard pointed out.
"Because they probably left to come back with a better plan!" Ram assumed with a sure gaze.
"Sneak attack..!" Rom also contributed to the conversation.
"Hmm. It seems probable." The second guard thought about it.
"Are you going to take their word for it? They just came! At least ask the Oracle!" The first guard said in exasperation.
"Right!" The second guard agreed as he went to notify the oracle.
"Ugh. Men." The first guard sighed as she returned to patrolling the city.
"Yeah, Rom! Let's tell Mina about what we heard!" Ram called her sister as she responded.
"R-Right!" Rom nodded as she trailed her sister back to the Basilicom.
"Good luck, you two!" The guard waved as his peer gave him a fed-up look.
The trio was currently on the northern island near the outskirts of Lowee. They landed in the middle of the landmass, which was just pure snow and some trees in a winter forest to the side, with a couple of mountains on the other side.
Monsters were few and far between as the only ones present would be some Tetris and Shrotamobs.
Not pushovers in the traditional sense, but nothing that two literal gods, plus an experienced martial artist couldn't handle.
"Alright, maggots! We're here." Brave Heart shouted in a drill sergeant tone.
"Sir yes sir, Meme Sergeant, sir!" AL shouted back as he comically saluted.
SALUTE!
"Nebula, stop this stupidity." Edge Heart had their face fall into a flat expression as he folded his arms.
"No can do, Edgy. I must properly train you in the art of being a meme CPU!" Brave Heart instructed as he shouted the words.
"Then I will partake in insubordination. Your training methods will probably equate to your level of IQ."
"Just like your body count." The veteran god shot back.
"Sacrificed himself to deliver the roast," AL observed as he did some sets of push-ups in the back.
"Extreme, but effective." He finished as he continued his sets of 100 push-ups. AL had a field of gravity that Brave Heart set up for him as his body was under twice the normal gravitational pull of the planet as he exercised.
His muscles flexed as he went down and up, fighting the push of the universal force. His Burning Fever was at its twofold state, which allowed him to take the brunt of the force of gravity as if it were normal.
It also left out parts of his body that couldn't take the brunt of the pressure such as his heart, lungs, and brain as most if not all of his internal organs were excluded thanks to the KI shield he had active from within.
How convenient.
He was even building a sweat in the cold temperature as this method of training had proved effective. His sweat drops froze as soon as they left his body, though.
"My 'virginity' has nothing to do with this conversation, you twit.'' Edge Heart jabbed as he then looked at his dominant hand after air quoting.
"And you still owe me my sickle." He reminded as he clenched it before looking back at Brave Heart.
"Wait, can't you just materialize a new weapon out of your god powers?" Brave Heart asked.
"You're asking me? I thought you were the expert." Edge Heart said with an amused look.
"But I don't use a weapon, you edge lord. Just like, close your eyes and think about what you want as a weapon or something." The blue god shrugged as Gris followed the more experienced god's instructions.
Gris shut his eyes and thought about his sickle kusarigama hybrid.
...
...
...
...!
He then felt a pull that turned out to be something coming towards him.
SHATTER!
ZOOM!!!
Meanwhile, at a crime lab somewhere in Lastation, a random stick flew out the window at hypersonic speeds.
"The hell?!" The forensic scientist frantically asked as the item he was studying for the Oracle flew through the window.
"What's all this commotion about-" His colleague would walk in with the intern.
"Uhh..." The scientist just stood there stumped. "The item we were studying just freaking flew out the window." He put it as best he could.
"How does this happen whenever I leave the room, Greg?" His friend sighed with a hand on her hip and a facepalm with the other.
"How is this my fault?!" The scientist gawked as the intern just looked around awkwardly.
"Uh, can I go on break now?" The intern asked, wanting none of this conundrum.
Back at the island, Gris felt the pull getting stronger as his hand began to shake.
"What's going... On over... There?" AL would ask as he would be on his third set of push-ups.
"Gris is feeling a disturbance in the Force." Brave Heart referenced as he had his arms folded as he watched the god's hand have an aneurysm.
The three males then heard a low whistle as AL and Nebula turned around to try and locate where the sound originated.
"Is that... Another portal?!" AL asked as he stood up, on guard.
"No. The sound is too natural. This is something that's coming towards us and fast." Nebula identified as he looked for the sound.
Then, they saw a faint dark object rush towards them and parted the snow as they turned to see it approach. It was the beaten and black rod that used to be Gris' weapon when they fought him before he agreed to join them.
DODGE!
WHOOSH!
GRAB!
Nebula had to weave his body and dodge the rod as it would then be clutched by Edge Heart before it was engulfed in a pixelated white and black light.
It was indistinguishable in shape and size as Brave Heart commented.
"That's the 19th time something in training almost killed me!" He noted incredulously as AL continued his set.
"Hard... Luck... Dude...!" AL responded in between push-ups.
"Says the guy who almost died from internal bleeding." Brave Heart reminded me.
"Shut... The... Fuck... Up...!" AL snapped back before continuing his training.
The pixels faded away after a bit and formed what looked to be a long weapon of sorts.
When they completely dissipated, Edge Heart was holding the pitch-colored shaft of a 6 and a half foot long scythe. It boasted an impressive 5 foot long curved metallic blade on both ends that had artic blue lights on the side that were in three diagonal lines on the flat side of the blade.
There was a blade on the bottom of the shaft as well, which would be about a foot long, and would be diagonal from the base to the side the scythe blade was on as it would also be metallic as it radiated white energy as it appeared to be a small hole, where the top of the scythe would be, dividing the long side of the blade from the short side.
Brave Heart and a training AL became agape as they looked at the weapon.
SWING!
CRASH!
PIXELATE!
RUMBLE!
Edge Heart twirled the scythe before swishing it to the side, causing a random Tetris that was about to attack him to be effortlessly pixelated as the snow would crash and the ground would slightly tremble.
The boys marveled at his weapon with some satisfaction as he raised it back up before planting the bottom blade into the snow.
"I can get used to this feeling. Already adapting as we speak." Edge Heart smirked as he looked between the two.
"Nice oversized farming tool." Brave Heart snarked as he got into a stance.
"Think you might be able to cut me down to size with all the grass you'll cut with it?" He would say with a confident smirk. "Or is it just what media portrays it to be? An overrated dysfunctional tool in practical combat." He left the statement for interpretation based on the results of the fight.
AURA!!!
"I believe you are underestimating my weapon, Nebula." Edge Heart cool warned as he pointed his blade at the god. "Know that the media overexaggerates everything for the sake of the Rule of Cool, and you will learn so the hard way... Retroactively, since my weapon is also cool." He retaliated as his aura returned to him, shining ever so brightly in his ascended state.
BURST!!!
The wild aura of Brave Heart burst to life in an orange explosion of power.
VANISH!
"Well then! Let's begin." Brave Heart motioned with a 'come hither' motion before vanishing.
PHASE!
"Tsk tsk tsk. Trying to outdo me in speed of all things. Truly a fool." Edge Heart's smirk widened to a grin before phasing as well.
"98... 99...100!" AL finished as he got up.
"Time for some squats! Never skip leg day, kids!" AL said to the audience before beginning to exercise again. "1... 2... 3..."
...Elsewhere, in the air...
SWING!
DODGE!
FLY!!!
Brave Heart dodged another slash of Edge Heart's scythe which let some wind blast out from the sheer pressure before flying further upwards.
ZOOM!
CHARGE...!
The scythe-bearing god chased his brethren, before beginning to slash the air while channeling some energy into his scythe.
BZZT!!!
"WHOA!"
DUCK!
Edge Heart then swung as an electric arc of energy expanded from the weapon as Brave Heart barely managed to dodge the attack.
The god dodged the arc as he felt a sense of dejá vu wash over him before shaking it off it as more electric arcs came flying at the god.
BZZT!!!
DODGE!
BZZT!!!
MANEUVER!
BZZT!!!
MANEUVER!
BZZT!!!
MOVE!
BZZT!!!
EVADE!
VOLTAGE!!!
CONNECT!
Brave Heart then maneuvered to dodge a vertical, then a diagonal left, followed by a diagonal right, before another vertical, then a horizontal, and finally a bigger X shaped one that clipped him on the leg in an electronic discharge.
"roblox screaming kid.mp3"
"Did you just recycle that meme?-" Edge Heart was cut off by the advancement of the plot.
PLUMMET!-
CRASH!!!
CRATER!
Brave Heart was dealt a shocking blow as he slammed into the ground, a crater forming on his landing.
Edge Heart then heard a voice that whispered something into his ears.
What if we put a gun... AND a scythe together?
The god raised an eyebrow as he pointed his scythe to Brave Heart.
BURST!
The targeted CPU in question quickly generated some KI in a sphere before enlarging it to the size of a car before throwing it.
BLAST!!!
"Catch!"
DODGE!
...
EXPLOSION!
WIND PRESSURE!!!...
The god blasted the energy ball that Gris easily dodged as it made the sky turn orange for a brief second as some wind blew behind him.
BOOM!
Edge Heart then gripped the shaft of his blade as an electrical round escaped from the small hole in the opening on the top.
"!!!" The two gods reacted to the mechanic of the scythe.
LEAP!
DISCHARGE!
"Shit!"
Brave Heart had to fly out of the way as it exploded in a radical discharge on contact, once again.
BOOM!
BOOM!
BOOM!
BOOM!
The blue god set off into a mad dash as the weaponized deity returned to giving chase as he flew over him, shooting his lightning rounds at Brave Heart.
VANISH!
VANISH!
VANISH!
VANISH!
Brave Heart however evaded the god once more as he ran on the snowy floor as it slightly reverberated from each shot that hit the ground. He dashed aside and vanished at each shot that tried to land its target.
It was some good training though, as they were somewhat developing their reflexes and speed respectively, as well as learning the kinks of the godly assassin's gardening tool.
"Rapid Rapture!"
BLASTBLASTBLASTBLASTBLASTBLAST BLASTBLASTBLASTBLASTBLASTBLAST BLASTBLASTBLASTBLASTBLASTBLAST BLASTBLASTBLASTBLASTBLASTBLAST BLASTBLASTBLASTBLASTBLASTBLAST BLASTBLASTBLASTBLASTBLASTBLAST BLASTBLASTBLASTBLASTBLASTBLAST BLASTBLASTBLASTBLASTBLASTBLAST BLASTBLASTBLASTBLASTBLASTBLAST BLASTBLASTBLASTBLASTBLASTBLAST!!!
But Brave Heart wouldn't be the mouse in this chase forever, as he soon began to levitate off the ground as he used his wings for support and would begin to fire back at Edge Heart.
The orange blasts expanded from the god's hands like automatic shotgun pellets as they raced towards Edge Heart.
ZIP!
ZIP!
ZIP!
ZIP!
ZIP!
ZIP!
ZIP!
ZIP!
ZIP!
ZIP!
ZIP!
ZIP!
ZIP!
ZIP!
ZIP!
ZIP!
ZIP!
ZIP!
ZIP!
ZIP!
ZIP!
ZIP!
The god clad in black now not only had to aim and fire at Nebula and land a hit which was challenging in itself, but also multitask with not getting hit by any of his retaliatory attacks.
BOOM!
ZIP!
ZIP!
ZIP!
BOOM!
BOOM!
ZIP!
ZIP!
BOOM!
ZIP!
ZIP!
ZIP!
BOOM!
ZIP!
BOOM!
ZIP!
Edge Heart soon began to aerial maneuver through the blasts as his shots would now be harder to land. He still attacked Brave Heart within the dodging aspect of his movements he was now be dodging his attacks simultaneously.
DISCHARGE!
DODGE!
DISCHARGE!
DISCHARGE!
VANISH!
DISCHARGE!
DISCHARGE!
DISCHARGE!
DODGE!
DISCHARGE!
DODGE!
VANISH!
DODGE!
DISCHARGE!
"This game of danmaku is getting hectic. Time to fly!"
FLY!
DODGE!
VANISH!
BOOM!
PHASE!-
BOOM!
EVADE!
ZOOM!!!
The levitating CPU decided to take the spar back up to the skies after dodging a few more of Edge Heart's shots as e ceased his attack. He flew up, while dodging more rounds from Edge Heart as Brave Heart would close the gap between the two.
SWING!
CLING!
CLASH!
SHOCKWAVE!
Edge Heart now switched to a more cclose-upstyle of fighting as he reached the god. They soon clash as the god swung his scythe as the blade glowed white as Brave Heart coated his arms in KI as he blocked with his arm.
PUNCH!
CLANG!
Brave Heart quickly threw a straight that was blocked by the shaft of Edge Heart's scythe.
"Hmph!" The god clad in black harrumphed.
Brave persisted with a follow-up jab before he was met with the bottom of the scythe raising to slash him.
JAB!
SLICE!
GRAB!!!
He grabbed the blade as his focus was redirected and barely had enough time to straight kick Edge Heart straight in the chest as he jerked the end of the scythe higher up to off put the scythe god, giving him the opening he needed.
YANK!
"Tch!" Edge Heart grumbled as he wrestled for control.
SLIP!-
KICK!!!
IMPACT!
"?!" He reacted as Brave Heart overcompensated his opponent's direction of applied force, causing him to fumble the blade with his godly strength.
Edge Heart was pushed back before he stopped himself midair.
STRETCH!
...!
GRAB!!!
He dusted off his chest as he looked at Brave Heart as he reached for his falling scythe, making it move towards his hand before he grabbed it.
Brave Heart backed away as he was lightly breathing. The god took his fingers and crack them forward as he stretched his arms.
"Although reused, that scream that was let out when you were struck was moderately humorous." Edge Heart remarked.
"Hey, I have PTSD with scythes. Still gotta get back at CFW Magic for that." Brave Heart cringed as he scratched his back in remembrance of the wound.
"Whom?" Gris inquired.
"Leader of ASIC. Goth mommy blah blah blah Strongest one blah blah blah, end of days blah blah blah, She duffed me blah blah blah She manhandled all 4 CPUs and the Candidate I told you about blah blah blah... Look, let's just take the training up a notch. It looks to me like you're getting the hang of that garden tool." Brave Heart gabbed as he stopped cracking his fingers.
"So be it." Gris agreed as he would get his scythe ready. "Wait, did you just refer to her in a sexualized manner-"
CLASH!
SHOCKWAVE!
They then rushed at each other before clashing in a shockwave.
They disengaged as they flew around, causing more shockwaves from following clashes as they would be moving at high hypersonic speeds.
SHOCKWAVE!
SHOCKWAVE!
SHOCKWAVE!
SHOCKWAVE!!
SHOCKWAVE!!
SHOCKWAVE!!
SHOCKWAVE!!!
SHOCKWAVE!!!
SHOCKWAVE!!!
SHOCKWAVE!!!
They zigged and zagged, corkscrewed, and covered long distances with each clash before re-engaging as they blitzed each other for a potential one up at every twist and turn.
"95... 96... 97... 98... 99... 100!" AL, back on the ground said as he then attempted to stand back up.
"Urk!... Hnn!... Aw shit." The flame user cursed as he realized he was now perpetually stuck. His legs had become too worn to get him out after 5 consecutive sets.
"Hm. What if I-" AL was cut off by a shockwave, bringing a wave of snow onto him as another shockwave echoed near him.
SHOCKWAVE!
He turned around just in time to be buried underneath 10 feet of snow.
"Wilhelm scream.mp3"
And AL now had to dig himself out of a hole. Well, hopefully before the gravity and snows combined weight crush him like a grape.
Elsewhere, in the vast expanses of space, a half mineral man, the half-animal statue would be floating. It had been there for thousands, millions, if not tens of billions of years at least. It had stopped thinking for several years so vast, that it could not even grasp its value for its superior intellect anymore.
...
...
...
The statue had long hair that sprawled about in its rock-like state.
Wings that were curled, with the action of trying to fly to somewhere in eternal cosmic stasis. It wore some sandals and a battle loincloth, its arms curled around its body as it moved in one central direction.
The statue's existence was lonely, boring and a possibly infinite step down from its previous prestigious placement on its previous planet.
...
...
...
It floated aimlessly, forever paying the price for what it had tried to do to another habitable planet by a hero now long gone.
The statue moved at the crawl he was pushed outwards into space all those years ago but, fate had something in store for the space rock...
This is a fanfic, of course, it did-
The mineral statue gravitated towards Gamindustri, the planet's surface and exterior reminding him a bit of his past world if he were conscious to witness it.
But fortunately enough, in the direction that the statue was drifting, he would be heading directly for the planet's exosphere. The statue was still in its inactive state of thinking, even when it approached the home of the CPUs.
His direction was towards the Loweean territory, of the coast of the nation, onto a certain uninhabited island...
...
...
...
GRAVITATIONAL PULL!
...
...
...
FALL!
The rock had finally been subject to the pull of the gravitational field of the planet as it was directed to the ground of said planet. It descended as the rock heated up.
FRICTION!
ABLAZE!
ZOOM!
The rock began to burn up in the atmosphere as it would be falling down the exosphere as friction would cause the rock to heat up substantially.
In the midsts of falling the statue started to have its color return to it as its features once again became distinguishable. Its skin was a healthy light peach tone as his wings retracted as his body would be very well built and tall.
6'8" to be exact, as had deep reddish-purple eyes that were currently fish-eyed for now as his hair returned to its wavy and dark magenta pigment as it flapped wildly in the atmosphere.
His loincloth became royal purple as his crotch guard underneath became its signature brown again alongside his leather boots as he raced to the surface.
TERMINAL VELOCITY
NYOOM!
He plummeted into the thermosphere as he hit terminal velocity soon after.
...
...
...?
He fed for a few more minutes as his consciousness would begin to return to him.
...
...
..!
His eyes slowly regained their alive gaze as he returned from his otherwise indefinite stasis.
He was still cramped and somewhat starved from drifting in space, but soon enough by the time he reached the stratosphere, he regained most of his consciousness.
"...?!" The statue turned alive wiped his eyes as he realized he was falling.
The humanoid creature analyzed that the temperature was cold from the wind and atmospheric pressure from intense calculations within his mind and that he was approaching an arctic continent from what he saw below, but wouldn't recognize the landmass at all.
The gravity would also be akin to his old planet as he adjusted accordingly.
"...What is this place?!" He asked himself as he fell, unable to use his wings properly as he would still be cramped up rom being a statue for the last 69,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 years.
Nice-
He then outstretched his wings in a gliding position as the friction died down as burned his skin at first before regenerating as he adjusted his speed. He still would be flying at quite a speed as he entered the troposphere.
CLASH!
BOOM!
CRASH!
RESOUND!
The gods continued sparring down below as they flew.
They connected before dispersing and coming back to clash again and again.
SWING!
CRACKLE!...
Edge Heart swung his scythe once more, as the familiar electric arc would return to strike Brave Heart.
"Bakuhatsu!"
THROW!
Brave Heart challenged the attack with a Bakuhatsu blast as he threw the attack.
SWING!
BZZT!
WOOSH!-
BOOM!!!
SMOKE!
The god chucked the energy blast as it collided with the electric arc and would cause a golden explosion in the sky. Subsequently, a large smoke cloud would have been formed as a result.
POOF!
...
CLASH!
Edge Heart flew through the smoke as he then came up close to Nebula once more as he flew straight through the smoke cloud.
POOF!
ZING!...
They continued their fighting shortly before another flying person fell through the smoke cloud.
"What the..." Brave Heart turned.
"An unfamiliar energy." Edge Heart described.
POOF!
PIXELATE!
ZOOM!
It killed an unsuspecting Shrotamob as it was there one second, and gone the next extremely quickly as it would continue to fall.
"?!" The spar was halted as Brave Heart sensed the unfamiliar energy that came from the figure that passed through the smoke cloud.
"Wait just a sec, Edgy. Did you see what just went through that cloud?" Brave Heart hissed his fellow god.
"No. The smoke obstructed my vision" Edge Heart reported since he was looking at the smoke cloud, rather than Brave Heart, whose back was turned.
"Meme Sergeant is disappointed. Well, from what I felt came through there, and it does not feel Gamindustrian. At all. " Brave Heart further described as he narrowed his eyes at the figure.
"Is it like Xero and Vhestora?..." Edge Heart asked as he too sensed the energy of the figure.
"Unlike them either. We might be dealing with the extraterrestrial." Nebula said as he would look at the falling object.
CRASH!!!
BOOM!!!
CRATER!!!
It soon landed in the snow as it caused some snow to be blown away, with AL as it freed him.
"Meep!" AL screamed as he was blown out of the snow, and finally into the open again.
He sprawled in the air before flipping and landing on a slide, regaining his bearings as he looked at the person within the crater that was formed from the impact as he breathed in sweet oxygen.
"The fuck?!" The afro fighter looked back as he saw the crater.
LAND!
GRAVITY!
CLEAR...!
The CPUs landed beside the flame user as Nebula switched to gravity and dispersed the field of excess snow that was pushed out from the crash landing.
STEP!
...
STEP!
...
STEP!
...
The trio would then watched the smoke cloud as it blocked the figure as said being emerged from the snowy landing site.
The figure stepped forth from the cloud as he looked around. He immediately recognized the place to no longer be the same planet he was blasted off of. For one, it was very cold as snow-covered for miles around, and the ecosystem from what he could tell was rather bizarre, which was unintentionally ironic coming from him.
The wildlife was something never before seen to the man as he glanced around. He would have to get some more answers, which came in the form of the three individuals in front of him.
They looked anthropomorphic, dare he say human, but inhuman at the same time. The middle one had flames for pupils and the other two had distinct glowing symbols for pupils.
They were tall, around the height of the man who sent him flying into space in the first place, and the blue one's hair colour was very out of place from where he originally came from, with the one clad in black's hairstyle.
But he wasn't even sure if they spoke his language. So to test the theory that they did speak the same language, he would remain silent to hear their utterances, and see if it resembled any language he knew.
"..." He stared among the three of them.
"His face sure is girly. Near effeminate." Brave Heart pointed out as he cupped his chin and squinted his eyes.
"But he's oddly masculine, simultaneously." He continued.
"I think his appearance is outshined by the fact that he's an alien." Edge Heart gave his peer a dull look.
"He freed me from the snow, so at least the first thing he did was helpful." AL pointed out as he cautiously looked at the alien man as he scratched his head.
"So you do speak something coherent to my ears." The alien man responded in a smooth and accented yet powerful voice.
"!?" AL would react.
"Damn, that alien speaks human!" The blue CPU shouted as he pointed his finger as his eyes widened.
"Humans? They exist here as well?" The alien asked. His face became serious as he awaited his answer.
"You are of human heritage?" Edge Heart asked back. The alien scoffed at the notion that he was compared to inferior lifeforms.
"Bah! Do not compare me to such lowly ants. I am Kars! The Ultimate Life Form! " He announced as he spread his arms as wings came forth from his arms, sprouting dark feathers as they were manifested.
He retracted them as the trio became shell-shocked surprised at how he grew them out of nothing.
"What the hell?!" AL questioned, startled as he took a defensive step back as he watched the avian appendages sprout.
"My word!" Edge Heart exclaimed. He grabbed his scythe defensively as the change surprised him.
"Holy fucking shit!" Brave Heart cured. He would also get some weird sense of familiarity with the term 'Ultimate Life Form' concerning a black hedgehog, a bio-android, a pocket monster made in a lab, and the king of ants.
SHING!...
Kars enjoyed the surprise towards himself and marveled as his face would have a slight smirk unnoticeable to the trio as he continued, going back to his arms being brought down as his forearm guards would return with long shimmering blades.
"Tell me. How are the humans of this world? Are they still as weak as I remember?" He queried with a questioning tone, as AL came forth.
"Why don't we go a few rounds and find out Cars? " AL challenged as the alien would be blatantly disrespecting his race just as he landed.
He staggered forward a bit as his legs were still wobbly from the training. He stood tall as he faced the alien.
"Oh? I've just landed and one of the inhabitants of this planet already wishes to die? " Kars retorted with a challenging tone.
"You don't seem ready to battle from my perspective, human." Kars pointed out as AL did not like the alien's condescending attitude.
"Calm down, AL." Edge Heart told the fire user as he switches his gaze to Kars.
"You perceive the humans to be feeble, yes? They are not. Humans have become capable of performing grand feats throughout the years. Myself a prime example. I was once human before I ascended into godhood." Edge Heart told the alien.
"A god?... How did you go about doing such a seemingly impossible task?" Kars asked, gathering information on the process.
"Hmph. Even if I did tell you, the necessary item needed is not found on this planet. Or dimension." Edge Heart specified as Kars' eyes widened.
"Dimension?! Just how advanced are these humans...?!" Kars questioned aloud as he was now interested in the previously assumed inferior beings.
"Wouldn't you like to know. But I would notify you that we are far from civilization, confined to a singular island." Edge Heart continued.
"And you seem decently powerful for your stature. I doubt someone who refers to himself as the Ultimate Life Form can thrive, let alone ascertain the information needed to survive in such lonely conditions, and with no one to test his superiority against with such a grandiose title." Edge Heart used the alien's title to draw out the possibility for the demonstration of his power.
A test was for his form, and this alien might be his match, as he would most likely strive to kill him.
"Likewise, coming from the one who calls himself a god. I suppose you are a 'god' as well?" Kars asked as he would turn to Brave Heart.
"Correctomundo. I am Brave Heart." The god introduced himself.
"And I am known as Edge Heart." The scythe-wielding god interjected as he identified himself as well. "And I have a proposition to make with you, Kars." The deity suggested outright.
"Proposition? What do you propose, god?" The ultimate life form asked.
"Simple. A fight. I and my fellow god were sparring, and you interrupted. As a consolation, you will fight me. If you win, we will tell you more about the planet you have landed on. If I win, your life will be spared, and you will have to manage on your own." Edge Heart proposed as he set his terms for their bout.
Kars reflected on the words of Edge Heart.
He was challenged to a fight by one of the gods of the planet, of most likely the human ones since he was of human heritage. He was also able to gain very important and helpful information on the customs, machinery, and lifestyles of the humans which were also most likely the dominant species of this world.
But from what he saw as the animals themselves were not like the ones back on earth- not in the slightest, he bet that something stronger than the humans existed here.
He could also refuse the offer and venture on his own, but they would most likely prevent him from doing so as he was foreign to their entire species and would be carried in for some kind of inspection, discretion, or several uncomfortable fates if he fought all three and lost.
FLAP!
FLAP!
FLAP!
FLAP!
WOOSH!!!
Not that he could lose. He had much more to gain from victory than ignorance or defeat, so he accepted the god's offer as he looked down at him.
"I accept your proposition. For you need to be educated on the power of the Ultimate Life Form!" Kars yelled as his hands turned back into wings as he flapped away from the snowy cloud behind him, as well as blowing some snow in front of him with strong winds.
The trio was unfazed as they stood there. Kars stopped flapping as he would have cleared the smoke from his impact onto the planet's surface completely as the large crater was present behind him.
...
It was deep enough to distinguish the snow from the steaming dirt as there was still some heat from the impact, even after Kars used his wings to slow his fall.
"That's one big crater." Brave Heart commented.
BOOST!
JUMP!
"This battle will make a bigger one, so let's bounce and give the contenders some space." AL wisely decided as he used his arms to fly back as the blue god took a wide jump backward.
Kars reverted from his animal hybrid state as he was now in his most human state.
TWIRL!
TWIRL!
TWIRL!
Edge Heart twirled his scythe as it would generate some wind pressure as he did to show his power and newfound skill.
POINT!
WHOOSH!
"You said something about the Ultimate Life Form, correct?'' The god asked as he would then point the scythe at Kars.
"Let us witness just how far that epithet carries you!" Edge Heart declared as he pointed the weapon at the alien.
"Such overconfidence. Such drivel. To even believe for a second that you can outmatch me!" Kars loudly retorted as he posed menacingly as his blades gleamed off the sun.
"Your defeat will be music to the ears as I warm up!" He finished as the theme for the battle would have been set.
"Talk about menacing. We have a fitness god versus an edgy god." Brave Heart commented as they were atop a small mountain, watching the fight from there.
"They throw around a lot of smart people words too," AL added. "When was the last time you heard someone use drivel and epithet in a sentence?" AL asked.
"When was the last time you won a fight by yourself?" Brave Heart jabbed.
"Ok, that one stung, but when was the last time you boned." AL fired back as the god would clutch his chest.
"Oh, my fragile masculinity! To go only a few days without coitus would cause my testicles to pop like pimples!" Brave Heart acted hurt as he picked up Edge Heart's mannerisms of speaking.
"What was that?" AL wheezed out as he laughed.
"A version of me that felt hurt by your insults. Probably 4 parallel universes away." The god would respond.
"Tough crowd." AL breathed out. "But anyway, who do you think is gonna win this fight?" AL asked.
"That's a question that will reveal itself in due time, AL. Kars has yet to show any offensive capabilities, which leaves his moveset up for speculation at most for now." Brave Heart began.
"At the same time, Gris has still yet to fully figure out all the new moves and upgraded tricks of his CPU form. Both parties can pull either something out of their ass or learn something new from this fight depending on who we're talking about." The blue CPU further explained as he observed the stare down. "It can go either way. But I believe that the match can tip in Gris' favor, as long as he doesn't get too cocky." Brave Heart finished as AL nodded in understanding
"Right, right... That Kars guy seems pretty cocky as well, though." AL pointed out.
...
...
...
ドドドド!!!
ドドドド!!!
ドドドド!!!
"That's why. If Gris can figure out his moves while he boasts about them to the heavens, then he'll win when he counters. If the opposite occurs, then it'll be Kars who analyzes him and cuts him down with his arm blades or something... It really can go either way." Brave Heart stressed as they grew quiet to hear the match.
A/N:
Heya there, reader!
If you're seeing this, this is a rewrite of the chapter, just to correct some repetition, fix some spelling errors, and improve the spelling quality, especially in the earlier chapters.
So remember, italics and bold is going for gold.
Onto the Lowee Arc!
We got to see our local edgelord roast an ASIC member, as well as the twins mistaking them for invading CPUs... Somehow.
And alongside those shenanigans, we have a crossover character. And none other than the reference that referenced its way into pop culture references: JoJo's Bizzare Adventure!
Alternatively, Jojo no Kimyou na Bouken.
I picked Ultimate Life Form Kars for this one because his fate at the end was left for speculation, other than he stopped thinking and was left to drift in space for all eternity.
So I just figured, hey, maybe Kars went through a wormhole at some point during the events of Part 6, and boom, Kars got transported to a different franchise. Simple, yet interesting. Kind of ironic since the anime for Neptunia and JoJo's were both made by David Productions.
Also because Novel Kars would skull fuck the Hyperdimension Neptunia Verse.
Including my OCs right now-
So yeah, stripper alien vs edgy deity. Get ready for that.
Arrivederci.
Read and Review.