It was snowing out, when Lux stepped through the massive wooden door and out into the courtyard. Flecks fell from the sky, landing on her face and melting when they met her skin, leaving droplets of water to stream down her, almost like tears.
Tears she refused to let spill, as she wiped away the specs of water with the sleeve of her robe. She would not cry, not again. She was Lux Erzsebet, she was the beast that mortals feared, that mothers warned their children about. She didn't cry over things that she couldn't fix. She didn't cry at all, not anymore.
Even so, as her footprints crunched in the snow beneath her, two words bounced back and forth inside her head, over and over and over, like a vinyl stuck in a loop.
My fault. My fault. My fault.
The snow seemed to be speaking to her, whispering the words into her ears with every step she took, the sound of the snow crushing beneath her feet providing a rhythm for these words. All Lux could think about was Elias, his smile, the way he told her how he loved her.
Lux couldn't remember what she looked like anymore, but Elias's face still stuck in the forefront of her mind, to the point where she could count every freckle, every strand of hair, every splash of green in his otherwise brown eyes. Every drop of blood that poured from his neck when Philip ripped it open in front of her.
Philip grabbed her moments after, tore her out of the home her and Elias had been hiding out in for the past few months. Hiding from the Coven, the night she'd fled. She told Elias what she was, a vampire, a curse, a creature of the night, and he hadn't cared. He'd loved her, and when she confessed the atrocities committed against her by Philip, Elias had insisted she run away with him.
Lux had foolishly listened.
But Philip found them. He always did. Elias had let him into the flat they'd purchased together, while she'd been in the shower. She'd come out just in time to see Philip tear his throat out.
Three excruciating weeks went by before Lux gathered the courage to kill Philip. It hadn't been her idea, though. When she was dragged back to the Coven, Philip had considered killing her, but Odo stepped in, pleading for her life. So instead, Philip kept her in their bed at all times, locking the door when he'd leave the room they shared, isolating her from the rest of the Coven.
Except Fulk.
He was permitted to enter, to give her leftover blood from the creatures they feasted on. It wasn't much, either, only enough to keep her alive and well, but still leaving her craving more.
It was Fulk who planted the idea in her head of killing Philip. Fulk, who had given her the lighter, that muggles used to set their cigarettes on fire. Fulk, who had packed their things as the sun set and Lux and Philip went to their bed. And it was Fulk who distracted the rest of the Coven with the intention of feasting, while Lux set Philip on fire and watched him burn into a pile of ash.
Then, they fled. They ran into the night, never to be found again by the Coven, though they knew they couldn't hide forever. Couldn't hide from Adelais and her wrath.
But they could try. And for the next twenty years, they'd been successful.
Sometimes, Lux wished they hadn't. Sometimes, she wished Adelais and the others would find her, find her and kill her so she'd be with Elias. She never had the courage to end her life by her own means, but if someone attempted to kill her, if Adelais pinned her down and moved to run a wooden stake through her heart, Lux didn't think she's do much struggling.
A crunching in the snow jolted Lux out of the memories of her past that had consumed every ounce of her attention.
When she turned around, she expected to see Fulk making his way towards her, breaking her harsh request for him to leave her alone, but it was not the man who had both saved and damned her. Instead, it was a boy she'd never spoken to before, though she'd seen him in classes. A Slytherin, with greasy hair and a long hooked nose approached her, dark eyes fixed on her with intention written into them.
"Do you want something?" Lux cocked an eyebrow, trying to radiate confidence as she spoke to him, when internally, she felt like melting into a puddle of misery.
"You're the new girl, yeah? Lux Erzsebet?"
She nodded, eyeing him hesitantly, not liking the way her name sounded on his tongue. "I am, yes. And you are…?"
"Snape, Severus Snape." Snape folded his arms across his chest, taking another step towards her, leaving a mark in the snow behind him. "You know, I've always found it odd that Hogwarts would accept a new student. That rarely happens, and with such turbulence happening in the world around us, with the Dark Lord and all that…" He trailed off.
"Your point?" She shifted her weight from foot to foot.
"My point being, I didn't care much, but then you started hanging out with those bloody Marauders, and it sparked my interest. So I did a little digging — my mother is a pureblood, you see. She knows all the families of Britain, wizard and muggle alike. And according to her, the Erzsebet family line died out in 1666, with a lad called Elijah. He, and his entire family, died in the Great Fire of London."
At the mention of her brother, of the rest of her family, and a confirmation of their rate, Lux's stomach lurched, but before she could say a word, Snape continued,
"Odd, wouldn't you say?"
"It must be an ancestor of mine. Perhaps the Elijah you spoke of had children, before passing away in that fire." Lux shrugged, telling herself that she was shivering due to the cold, and not Snape's implications. What could he possibly know about her past? Any records of her family and herself were likely so skewed from the years, there would be no way to tie them to her, not concretely, anyways.
Snape tilted his head to the side. "Even stranger, though, the Erzsebet's were all muggles, save for one. A little girl, also called Lux went to Hogwarts, only to be caught with a spellbook and burned as a witch in her muggle village."
She let out a breath, the air around her fogging up as she exhaled. "What are you implying, Snape? That I rose from the dead? I share the name as an ancestor of mine. How shocking."
"I've seen you, when you thought you weren't being watched. I've seen how you sneak out in the nights, and into the forest, sometimes accompanied by Ingelger, sometimes not. Tell me, Lux Erzsebet, how do you walk in the sun? Is it an enchantment? Or have vampires evolved beyond the need for the darkness?"
Lux's dead heart fell to the ground, and any remaining color in her face faded into oblivion. "Don't be ridiculous." She managed to sputter out, her breath slowing down, as though her body was preparing to shut down once again, shut down like it had before when the flames had danced on her skin and burned her. Burned her like her family had burned, if Snape was correct.
"If anyone is being ridiculous, it's you, thinking you would be able to get away with such a secret in this castle for as long as you have. Surely you figured someone was bound to find you out, you and your 'father'."
"I don't know what you're talking about." Lux shook her head, pushing past him, though Snape grabbed onto her upper arm and held her down firmly in place. If she wanted to, she could surely fight against his grip — she was far stronger than him, after all, but if she were to do that, it would only confirm his suspicions against her. Her supernatural strength couldn't be revealed to him. So instead, she glared up at him and spat, "Let go of me."
"Make me." He tilted his head to the side, wearing a sardonic smirk that didn't suit his face whatsoever. It was like a man who'd for the first time in his life had glimpsed power, and was trying desperately to seem as though he'd had it forever.
When Lux said nothing, he tightened his grip, to the point where her arm began to ache from his touch. Still, even as his nails dug through her robes and into her skin, she remained stoic, firmly held in place without attempting to flee. "Tell me, Erzsebet, what was it like to burn alive?"
"If you don't let go of me, I'll make it my life's mission that you'll find out."
"Oh, cut the act." With his free hand, he waved dismissively, and Lux fought the urge to smack him. "It isn't as though I'll tell anybody — yet. As long as you do as I say. You and Ingelger's secret will be safe with me."
"You know nothing, Snape. Nothing. Now unhand me before I cut your fingers off one by one."
"Someone's feisty."
"You think I'm a vampire? How would you like to test that theory? Your blood is likely repulsive, but I suppose it'll have to do. Tearing out your throat would be oh so easy." As if to emphasize this, with her free hand, Lux trailed her finger over Snape's Adams apple, grinning to herself as he flinched.
"You kill me, and the entirety of Hogwarts will be trying to find you."
"I'm good at hiding." She said with the cock of her eyebrow. "Now, I won't ask you again, Snape. Let. Me. Go. Because I'm getting awfully hungry."
Snape obeyed, releasing her from his grip. "I'll get you for this, Erzsebet! Just you wait!" He pointed an angry finger at her as he stomped away, his chest rising up and down with every shaky breath he took.
Lux simply smirked, watching in satisfaction as he trembled his way out of the courtyard.
Sirius had never been more angry in his life, he realized as he stormed through the Gryffindor common room and up to his dorms, slamming the door behind him. Remus was supposed to be his friend, his best mate, at that. And here he was, coveting the one thing Sirius had wanted. Lux was supposed to be his, he was supposed to be hers! Remus didn't even like her!
"What has you in a mood?" James looked up from the book he was reading, sprawled across his bed, leaning on his stomach and propping his head up with his elbows.
"Has Lux woken up?" Peter asked before Sirius could say anything.
"Yep." He snapped, sitting down on his own bed and resting his head against his pillow. "She sure has."
"Oh no." James pressed his lips together, staring at him through his silver glasses. "What's happened?"
"Remus bloody happened."
"Moony?" Peter's brow furrowed together. "What did he do?"
"He kissed Lux."
"What?!" Peter and James shouted in unison, their heads both jerking towards Sirius with expressions of shock written into their faces.
"What do you mean, Remus kissed her?" James sputtered. "Tell me you're joking."
"Why would I joke about that?" Sirius grumbled. "He kissed her, and then shortly after is when Lux collapsed. That's what she told me."
"Did you talk to Remus about this? She could be lying."
"Why would Lux lie about that, James?" Peter frowned.
James shrugged.
"Remus admitted to it." Sirius sighed, running a hand through his long black hair. "He admitted to kissing her. To kissing Lux. Fuck, Prongs, I really like her. You know that, right?"
"Trust me, we know." James rolled his eyes. "You're a lovesick puppy when it comes to her."
"Always throwing the dog jokes at me."
"You make it too easy." Peter laughed.
"I just…I can't believe he'd do that to me."
"Did Lux kiss him back?" James asked.
Sirius shrugged. "I don't know. I didn't think to ask. Probably not. We all know she hates him, just as much as he hates her. Prongs, Wormy…fuck…this just hurts. This hurts so much. He bloody betrayed me."
"It was one kiss, Sirius." Peter sighed. "It probably meant nothing."
"How can a kiss mean nothing?"
"I mean, you snogged Mary MacDonald for all of your fourth year, and you two never properly dated. You aren't even going out with Lux, so I don't think you get dibs on her or whatever."
"It's not about that. It's not about Lux, it's about Remus." When James lifted an eyebrow, Sirius continued, "Okay, yeah, it's about Lux too. But he…he went after the girl I fancy. How fucked up is that? We're supposed to be best mates."
"Pads," James let out a breath. "You can't let some girl come between you and Remus. You've only known her for a few months, and Remus has been our best mate for years. Don't let Lux ruin the Marauders, and our friendship."
"It's too late for that, I reckon."